Blogs about: A New Level Of Hell
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At what price pain?
I have someone who helps me–she helps me put a pain I cannot categorize into a context that I sometimes forget–because I am in such pain. She helps me find the evidence to disarm my fear. … more →
Surviving Recovery
At what price pain?
notanun wrote 4 months ago: I have someone who helps me–she helps me put a pain I cannot categorize into a context that I … more →
The Witching Hour
notanun wrote 9 months ago: I could learn to hate midnight. At midnight the pill that brought blessed unconsciousness some hours … more →
After Waiting
notanun wrote 9 months ago: Yesterday the past four months seemed like an eternity in Hell. This morning it seems like just minu … more →
Permission to Leave
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notanun wrote 9 months ago: First, I never wanted cancer. I never wanted to be a widow or celebate or sad or angry. I never want … more →
Waiting Room
notanun wrote 10 months ago: There is a room in my house where I wait. It used to be my bedroom and now I hardly recognize it. Th … more →
Quiet Time
notanun wrote 10 months ago: It is a quiet time in this house. There are few noises to interrupt the silence. There is a snore fr … more →
Not alone yet
notanun wrote 10 months ago: He coughs in his sleep. He sleeps a lot. When he is awake, it isn’t really him. The cancer cha … more →
Who takes care...
notanun wrote 11 months ago: A ribald old ditty from my formative years keeps whistling through my mind,”Who takes care of … more →
A Trying Time
notanun wrote 11 months ago: I try so hard to stay up. I try so hard not to let the water get from the back of my nose to the fro … more →
Okay
notanun wrote 11 months ago: Am I okay? No not today. When will I be okay? I wish I knew. I have never done this before. In fact, … more →
A Silver Anniversary
notanun wrote 11 months ago: Yesterday marked the beginning of our 26th year together. I wear a very lovely princess cut diamond … more →
Oh, Tannenbaum
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notanun wrote 1 year ago: It’s hard to know that you will be the one putting up the Christmas tree alone next year. It’s hard … more →
We Gather Together
notanun wrote 1 year ago: It is Thanksgiving again. I am struggling with the whole attitutde of gratitude thing. I have a few … more →
Which Stage is it Today?
notanun wrote 1 year ago: Some very clever people have written about the seven stages of grief. I seem to trill through them l … more →
Fighting Fair
notanun wrote 1 year ago: We are fighting cancer. Cancer has the muscle and smart money behind it. We have chemicals and radia … more →
Dorothy, this isn't Kansas
notanun wrote 1 year ago: The Hospice nurse is named Dorothy. She is gentle and soft spoken. Every Kaiser nurse I’ve met … more →
Chemo Interruptus
notanun wrote 1 year ago: Necessary caveat: This blog is entirely, unashamedly self serving. I don’t care whether it has … more →
PICC a Line
notanun wrote 1 year ago: This is a week of learning. We have learned that every time you think there is no deeper pain, you c … more →
The Rollercoaster Leaves the Loading Dock
notanun wrote 1 year ago: Today marks the beginning of cancer reprise week 3. Three weeks ago we were healthy, we were looking … more →
