Snickers’ Super Bowl commercial.

Happy centennial, vidheads. I thought I would celebrate my 100-plus blog hits milestone by posting my favorite Super Bowl XLIV commercial. Is it just me, or do the commercials get suckier every year? I call it the “Golden Sh*t Rule”: He who has the gold doesn’t necessarily have a stellar creative advertising team. There are one or two gems among all the nuggets every year (seriously, GoDaddy.com, Danica “Sell-Out” Patrick has run the sex appeal thing into the ground). The beer companies usually come out swinging,though, especially Budweiser and Bud Light. The one a few years back where the horse farted in the girl’s face was CLASSIC, and last year’s guy getting thrown through a high-rise office window was hi-fargin-larious. This year’s “House O’ Beer” was comedic genius as well, but I gotta hand it to Snickers: Their commercial featuring a smack-talking Betty White and Abe Vigoda in a pick-up game of tackle football took the cake. Or, deliciously filling candy bar, rather.

Seems like the best thing I can do, considering that my team lost. Ah well. Good for the Saints. They were long overdue (given that they had never won a Super Bowl before. Ever). Go Colts 2011.

LA Record recently published my review of Kyle Mabson’s Birthday Party at Pehrspace. Click here to read it. It features my perspective on Signals, Breezee One, XboxRox, and Abe Vigoda. I think that it came out really well, although there are two typos that I made and didn’t catch before I sent it to the editor. I won’t tell you where they are.

image source: associated press

Congrats to the Saints for their big win last night! Okay, let’s move past football, because as we know the Super Bowl telecast isn’t really about the game but the commercials.

With the exception of a couple of gems, I found most of the ads this year to be boring, and in some cases kind of disturbing (who knew Doritos had so much rage). Oh, and CBS really cranked out the promos…was that how they were able to sell all the ad space because they kept more than usual for the network? Hmmm. Anyway, speaking of promos, definitely the  highlight of the night was the Late Show with David Letterman spot, with guests stars Jay Leno and Oprah Winfrey. Wow, everyone was able to stay hush-hush weren’t they, as we definitely didn’t see that coming:

And then the Snickers ad which featured Betty White and Abe Vigoda. Awesome:

I was mildly interested in HomeAway.com with the whole National Lampoon’s Vacation thing:

What else…the Google ad was two parts ridiculous and one part clever; the Denny’s ads made me chuckle; and the killer whale in the backseat for Bridgestone Tires was way too obvious before they even mentioned bachelor party, although it kind of gets funnier the more you watch it. Here’s the clip…because I’ve always wanted to end a blog post with video of a killer whale:

I adore Betty White (and all her fellow Golden Girls.) In fact, I’ve been known to slam down half a cheesecake — by myself, sigh — in their honor. Joined by the incomparable Abe Vigoda, they almost made all the incessant Super Bowl ad chatter worthwhile. I love Abe Vigoda so much, that I want a Jesus Fish, only I’d call it a Fish Fish and it would have Abe Vigoda’s his head on it. Saying “What Would FISH Do?” (WWFD?)

In fact, a super someone made me one. Behold!

Here is the the Ad, in case you are like me and avoid football thingies at all costs:

Super Bowl Sunday has come and gone. It was a great game. The Saints won. Lots of my friends lost money because of it. The halftime show was interesting (more on that after my rant on the commercials) The commercials were back to being humorous … sort of. I was expecting a lot more from them this year. A lot of hype was put out pre-game talking about how the commercials would be back to fun this year. There were some, but others fell flat for me.

I have to admit I did not watch the entire game. I had no stake in the teams playing so we turned it off around the end of the first quarter and DVRed the rest of it. I am LOVING DVR but more about that in a future Techtainment Tuesday. One thing I will say however, and this can really be noticed when you watch the game at a later date, is that it seems that the game is more centered around the commercials instead of the other way around. I remember watching football and you would actually see them on the sidelines talking, watch some of the injuries being taken off the field, see the crowd reactions that aren’t placed advertising. Now, anytime there is the slightest break in action, the squeeze in a commercial. Granted this is the Super Bowl and they want the money … but still.

On to the commercials. I may have missed a few, or just don’t remember them if they weren’t that good, but a few did stand out. They are in no particular order of showing during the game, just as I remember to talk about them as I am writing. (You can see all of them here. I linked to the ones I liked individually below.)

First we have the much hyped and highly controversial Tim Tebow/Focus on the Family ad. I was expecting a much harder pro-life message that I saw. Despite my personal beliefs, I was a little disappointed. If you are going to throw a controversial message out there, go for it. Don’t wuss out. After all the talk about it, I think the soft message hurt their cause. But that is just me.

Next we have the commercial I was really excited about when I heard about it. The Snickers ad with Betty White and my main man, the defyer of the death pool, Abe Vigoda. Now I know they are both too old to actually play football, but I would have loved to see a little more Abe in there. I also would have liked to see a little bit more of Betty’s sassiness.  Overall, wanted more but still a good one.

Simpson’s And Coke. Since I love all things Simpson, and I am a Coke addict, this was a knock out in my opinion. Not much more for me to say on that one other than “Exxxxcccelent”

I don’t know about anyone else, but I was a little uncomfortable for the 10 seconds of the Leno/Oprah/Letterman ad. I understand that they have all had their feuds, but I just didn’t get it.

Doritos made me COL (chuckle out loud) with 2 of their spots. The “No Bark Collar” I thought was pretty good and I really liked the “Boy Slaps Man” spot.

Is Google trying to maneuver itself into being a dating site next? I don’t want to think that they will be the next great matchmaker. Too much creepiness when it is really thought about.

I almost forgot that I did like the Kiss Dr. Pepper commercial. Although I can’t stand Dr. Pepper. I would die of thirst first. But I liked the commercial.

That leads me to my favorite commercials every year, the Talking babies of E*TRADE. I am not sure why I like these so much but I do. They are hilarious to me. This year was no exception. My favorite of them was the “milkaholic”, That one was funny wolf style aaahhhoooooooooo. We talked about the Milkaholics, now is time for the geriatrics.

Moving on to the halftime show. I have to mention it briefly because I have learned something. I have to stop watching the Super Bowl Half Time Show whenever they have “classic” music acts. I was excited to see The Who. I have been a Who fan for years. I even watched Roger Daltrey as an immortal on Highlander. What I can say about their performance last night is … they had a cool light show. I hate to say it but they are showing their ages. (It looked like they even brought in Dr. Kevorkian on keyboards). I had the opportunity to see The Who in concert at Alpine Valley back in 1988 or ’89. I went with a couple of my buddies John and Mike. (Mike actually is the author of the Olive Oil & Garlic blog) Of course this was many years ago when they were probably around my age now. They were still good. Roger’s voice could still get up there. Watching the aging rockers, no matter who they are, make me cringe a little bit. They had a cool light show though.

Well, that is about it for today. Nothing profound, just wanted to get a few things off my chest. I am sure I forgot plenty of commercials and like some others didn’t and I KNOW I hated some that others liked. Let me know if you agree with me or not on anything. Especially The Who. I would love to hear from my more musically aware friends on that um … experience.

I will see you all at Denny’s tomorrow for the free Grand Slam Breakfast. Until then remember … Metamucil: It helps you go to the toilet so you won’t get cancer and die.

It seems we may have survived Snowpocalypse 2: The Snowmaggedon, so let’s have some cawffee and tawk, shall we?

The Morning Brew: Good to the last drop

• Several years from now, young children will ask where I was when the great Blizzard of 2010 started.  I shall regale them with stories of bartending a packed bar (and making money hand over fist) on Friday night.  Snowmaggedon almost took EddieRue Elaine the Explorer hostage at 3:15am Saturday morning, determined to keep her trapped in the alleyway by the bar.  But for a shovel and some kitty litter, all would have been lost.  EddieRue mustered all of her energy and, using the kitty litter, obliterated the Snowmaggedon’s thousands of MinionFlakes and away we went….slowly.  Very, very slowly.
• Pat Collins of NBC Washington was a workhorse during the Storm of the Century, reporting live from Connecticut Avenue NW throughout the day Saturday.  Two of the best moments: Pat joins Brenda to go get some coffee.  AND  Pat interviews Sandwich Girl who walked 6 miles total, during the Blizzard, for a free sammich from Giant.
• As part of Snowmaggedon’s nefarious plot to consume our lives, it took away power, heat, and the ability to keep eggs cold.  During my adventures Saturday, I found several poor souls, just a few blocks away who were unfortunate enough to live in a power grid which succumbed to Snowmaggedon.  With board games, wine, and salsa in hand, these refugees (also known as my friends Jay, Este and Chris)  returned with me to Crystal Towers to enjoy the heat, television and the ability to charge cell phones.  As we continued through the evening, more refugees from the neighborhood trekked through Snowmaggedon to join us.  Surrounded by packed moving boxes, our little refugee camp enjoyed 5 bottles of wine and polished off a bottle of Ketel One.  Rumor has it, the power grid finally won it’s battle with Snowmaggedon sometime yesterday.  Hot showers were had by all.
• Apparently, in the midst of the Snowmaggedon, and proving that real life exists outside the Beltway Bubble, there was some sort of sporting event.  Commercials were to be watched.  Watch them, I did not.  Until this morning.  Thank you, YouTube.  Betty White & Abe Vigoda?  EPIC CLASSIC.  Leno, Oprah and Letterman?  A RIOT.  #GeauxSaints.

And…back in the ol’ hometown…

• GOD BLESS YOU State Journal-Register for giving me this gem this morning!  I shall reprint the whole thing in its 3 sentence entirety. 
  • A 21-year-old woman used a pan as a weapon while fighting with a 34-year-old man Sunday morning, according to a police report.  The victim said the dispute occurred about 9:25 a.m. inside the kitchen of a home in the 1500 block of South Seventh Street.  The victim suffered scratches and lacerations, police said.

Re Tweet Tweet

• @thisismewriting   Luv how Washington Post–breaker of Watergate–has been reduced to covering the #snowpocalypse snowball fight schedule. http://bit.ly/cThnv8
• @wilw In space, no one can hear you take off your sunglasses. // This is now my official deep thought for the day. Bless you wilw!

…The Mid-Morning Boost

The Snowmaggedon in Pictures:  Part 1 & Part 2

Super Bowl commercials this year had their moments: Leno/Oprah/Letterman was a surprise, Doritos had quite a few good ones and I personally liked the beavers playing the fiddles and of course, “House Rules” where a kids slaps some rules into his mother’s date. There was also the Snickers commercial with Betty White and Ave Vigoda which was one of the most popular this year, and won USA Today’s poll for top commercial of the year (see link below).

But, overall, this years commercials pretty much drew a yawn from me. I’ll admit, I’m in the minority who found the “pants off” commercials funny, but there were just too many of them for one to stand out. And of course there was Tim Tebow. The much hyped “Focus on the Family” ad was a dud. I should have known in advance, but I’m glad that it ranked so low (54 out of 65 according to USA Today).

So let’s hear it from the people. What were your favorite commercials this year? Did they live up to expectations?

From USA Today:

Three years after getting hammered by gay activists for what many felt was an anti-gay Super Bowl commercial, the Mars candy walked off with the Super Bowl’s best-liked commercial in USA TODAY’s Ad Meter.

And there was nothing controversial about it this time — unless you have a problem with old folks getting decked.

“Obviously, we were very, very concerned about portraying a brand like Snickers in the most positive light,” says Carole Walker, head of integrated marketing communication at Mars. “It’s three years later, we’ve done our homework. We’ve done our research. We were absolutely not nervous about the campaign in any way.”

The Betty + Abe Vigoda = The only reason the Super Bowl exists

So it turns out that I wasn’t the only person who was underwhelmed by the quality of the Super Bowl ads. Advertising Age sage Bob Garfield ’77, who’s been rating the ads for 24 years, had this take: “We will say this: We are totally pro-TiVo.”

Garfield’s best grade was three and a half stars, and only three ads earned it: Audi’s green police (yes, I laughed), Chrysler’s ad for its new Charger, and Qualcomm’s FloTV. The last two went over bigger with the two guys I was watching with; I’m just a little tired of the ads that Garfield calls “being emasculated by the ol’ ball and chain.” He did, however, rightly call out Go Daddy for its incredibly sexist, juvenile spots; he gave the company zero stars and called it “a national embarrassment.”

I’m a little disappointed that Garfield gave only two stars to a consensus favorite in my living room: the Snickers ad with Betty White and Abe Vigoda. And, probably because his review is done Friday, he didn’t even mention our favorite: David Letterman, Oprah Winfrey, and Jay Leno at what certainly was the world’s worst Super Bowl party. (Here’s the story behind that ad.)

If you need to refresh your memory, you can watch all of the ads here.

Lori Shontz, senior editor

I wanted to do a running diary of Super Bowl XLIV, but didn’t want to miss a second of it, so I decided to jot down my thoughts with pen and pad (remember those things) in very rough shorthand. Hopefully I can read my notes! Enjoy!

FIRST HALF

1:08pm Pacific Standard Time – On the way home from picking up some snacks at Foodland (the line for the raw fish was insane!) I heard Jim Gray on the radio say “They’re clearing the field for Queen Latifah.” That’s sad to hear. Last I heard, she had lost a lot of weight.

1:16pm Pacific Standard Time – Stopped off for some Korean BBQ and see a father and son doing yard work outside. If you make your son do yard work on Super Bowl Sunday–especially that close to kickoff time–you’re a Nazi. Fuck off.

1:21pm Pacific Standard Time – I took the Underwood on who would sing the national anthem. Gonna Carrie on with the game now.

1:22p PST – You don’t hear “ramparts” and “o’er” used much anymore. That’s some Star-Spangled banter right there for ya.

1:23p PST – Only in Hawai’i do the locals let off fireworks in their backyards at the conclusion of the national anthem.

1:26p PST – I love the other McDonald’s commercial featuring Shaq and Dwight Howard shooting free throws. They were originally going to play for lunch at the Super Bowl, but nobody made a free throw ’til October.

1:27p Cris Carter not in the Hall of Fame is a travesty.

1:27p Jeez. Russ looks awfully Grimm today.

1:27p I hope John Randle shows up for the Hall of Fame induction ceremony with his trademark face paint on.

1:31 Oh great… Jim Nantz and Phil Simms. I get to hear these two idiots argue about the most mundane details for 4 hours. I guess I should just be ecstatic that Joe Buck is nowhere near the broadcast booth. Whew.

1:33 Early on, Dwight Freeney looks about as explosive as Richard Reid’s shoe bomb.

1:36 If Pierre Garçon was in France, would calling him by his last name be insulting?

1:37 Nice grab by Austin “the Great” Collie.

1:42 FG by Stover. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: If you grade on a 2010 Playoffs curve alone, Matt Stover has looked like the best kicker of all time up to this point.

Indianapolis 3 New Orleans 0

1:43 Betty White and Abe Vigoda in the same ad (Snickers)? I’m speechless. And orgasmic.

1:44 One Korean BBQ plate down, lots more face-stuffing to go.

1:45 It’s official. Nice commercial, Hyundai. My next car will be a Sonata.

1:46 The only way that Boost Mobile Shuffle commercial could have been better is if it were longer. 4 stars.

1:47 Kudos to Jim Nantz for trying to make a non-fumble that was caused by the ground and recovered by the Saints anyway sound like an important event. Way to go, slugger.

1:48 If they keep using this music for breakdowns, Colin Cowherd will be forced to change his theme music. CBS ruins everything!

*side note* Watching Mike & Mike in the morning as I type this up and unfortunately that means I get to hear from Reisha Candidate twice every hour. She is simply the worst. She belongs with all the lackluster (non-)talent on Fox Sports.

1:49 I have a feeling Dallas Clark and Reggie Bush will have big games. Peyton + Clark = money in the bank and Bush has tons to prove.

2:01 Garçon scores. Sacrebleu!

Indianapolis 10 New Orleans 0

2:03 Undercover Boss? Sounds like a horrible cop movie starring Bruce Springsteen.

2:08 Nice Hangover ripoff, Bridgestone!

2:13 Lovely run by Pierre Thomas. Has there ever been a Super Bowl featuring two Pierres?

2:17 Freeney detonates, sacking Drew Brees with authority. Garrett Hartley kicks a FG.

Indianapolis 10 New Orleans 3

2:19 Shutter Island is destined to be the best film about window blinds ever.

2:20 Leno and Letterman together!? Simply perfect. Please tell me they double-teamed Oprah after the shoot.

2:21 Career Builder’s “Casual Friday” commercial was phenomenal. But I think they already go to work like that in Europe.

2:22 The funniest/scariest thing about that Favre in 2020 ad is that it is within the realm of possibility.

2:24 Joseph Addai looking like an MVP candidate thus far.

2:25 Garçon drops a big pass. I love that they put the accent mark on the back of his jersey. Classy.

2:26 Bud Light is an easy winner thus far for most consistently annoying and over the top (not in a good way) commercials.

2:32 What a privilege it is to get to see Brees & Manning in their primes on the grandest stage there is in pro sports. They are the epitome of slick.

2:33 When practicing reverses, coaches need to remind WRs to throw the ball away when the reverse is going nowhere.

2:38 CSI: Miami in outer space? That makes sense, actually. The galaxy is the only place big enough to contain David Caruso’s ego.

2:40 I’m impressed at how Gene Simmons always finds new, fresh ways to embarrass himself completely and that people keep allowing him to do so.

2:42 Colts D steps up. Oops. No TD for you, Saints.

2:45 Jim Caldwell looks a bit like ROC, doesn’t he?

2:49 The Intel commercials are pretty great…until the annoying conclusion-when Intel employees go “bom, bom, bom, bom.” Ugh.

2:50 Garrett Hartley is starting to look like Matt Stover. FG Saints.

Indianapolis 10 New Orleans 6

HALFTIME

2:52 Will.I.Am should be nowhere near a Who song. First Dylan, now the Who? Please just stay the fuck away from the Beatles, asshat! Why don’t you just f-f-fade away?

2:54 OK, I’m getting an Acura now. That was purty.

2:56 Shannon Sharpe is a freakin’ weirdo. I think CBS should trade him to Fox Sports for Terry Bradshaw.

3:03 “Baba O’Riley” is quite possibly my favorite song of all time. “…teenage wasteland”, huh? Isn’t that what Pete Townshend calls it when all of his crushes get too old for him?

3:06 “Who are you?” That’s exactly what everyone under the age of 20 is wondering about the Who this very second.

3:10 Literally got goosebumps in the middle of “Won’t Get Fooled Again”. Another one of my all-time favorites.

3:11 Roger Daltrey must have got directions from George W. Bush. He pointed to the right when he said “left” and vice versa.

3:12 Tuck your shirt in, Pete. The Feds are watching.

SECOND HALF

3:22 Onside kick! Finally a moment that got me off my seat, clapping and whooping!

3:23 How was a personal foul not called on the Colts’ player who was kicking a Saint repeatedly? That’s not very Christian of you, sir!

3:26 Lots of holding calls not being penalized by the refs. Looks like they’re letting ‘em play. Kind of refreshing. The second quarter flew right by.

3:27 Pierre Thomas TD!

New Orleans 13 Indianapolis 10
Pierre Thomas 6 Pierre Garçon 6

3:28 I’m loving Jake Gyllenhaal’s British accent in this upcoming Prince of Persia movie.

3:30 Stevie Wonder and Tracy Morgan? What a duo!

3:32 Until a second ago, Peyton Manning had thrown as many completions in the last 70 minutes as Curtis Painter.

3:35 Mark it down: This Manning kid’s gonna be in the Hall of Fame someday. Sorry. I just passed out for a minute and dreamt I was Larry King.

3:38 There have been more missed tackles in this game than that Browns-Lions game. Addai scores.

Indianapolis 17  New Orleans 13

3:39 Clark Griswold in the Napoleon Suite? Why didn’t he just use the Underhill’s account?

3:41 Free Denny’s Grand Slam breakfasts this Tuesday! The heart disease will cost you a little extra.

3:49 Garrett Hartley has been magnificent. FG Saints.

Indianpolis 17 New Orleans 16

3:53 Shit! Kia Sorento, you will be mine. I’m a sucker for awesome commercials.

3:57 Don’t thank us die hard fans yet, NFL. Just make sure there are no lockouts in your future and we’ll thank you.

4:05 Matt Stover misses. Garrett Hartley has just overtaken Stover as the best kicker in NFL history.

4:05 Matt Stover misses a big kick? Fantasy football veterans are not the least bit surprised by this development.

4:14 TD Saints! Nice to see Jeremy Shockey get another chance at a big Super Bowl moment.

New Orleans 22 Indianapolis 17

4:19 Lance Moore makes a miracle grab for the 2 point conversion. Great call to overturn the original call of “incomplete” by the crew upstairs.

New Orleans 24 Indianapolis 17

4:20 Just got a visit from the mongoose who lives in my backyard (“Moki”). Judging by his skin tone, he’s a fan of the Saints. He has exquisite taste.

4:20 Fuck! Looks like I’m getting a Honda Crosstour now! Ad wizards, I tell ya.

4:27 “The Green Police” was a great concept and commercial. Oh, and I’m getting an Audi now.

4:29 Pick 6 by Tracy Porter!!! The most exciting play in sports

New Orleans 31 Indianapolis 17

4:30 Tim the Dorito ninja is my new hero.

4:30 That pick 6 by Peyton Manning was a very Favre-ian throw.

4:31 It’s a good thing Simpson didn’t break that kickoff return for a TD. That holding penalty would have been heart shattering.

4:33 Alrighty, Hyundai. You got me back. You had me at…um…Hyundai. I’m getting a Sonata.

4:43 Pass incomplete on 4th and goal for the Colts. The Saints will be champions! Very happy for Sean Payton, Drew Brees and the city of New Orleans. They all deserve it among countless others. Go Saints! Congratulations.

4:45 “Mardi Gras is about to breakout in Miami.” – Jim Nantz. Damn skippy.

4:46 Burn your paper bags, New Orleans fans! The Saints are champs and no one can ever take that away from you. “Ain’t” it sweet?

4:50 Moki the mongoose is back. He must be here to gloat.

4:57 Good to see Len Dawson looking bright eyed and bushy tailed as he brings forth the ultimate prize in the NFL. That put a legitimate smile on my face.

5:03 Drew Orleans is a class act. I’m not the most lovey dovey person in the world and I’m not even sure I ever want to have a child, but that moment with his infant son was a very special, tender moment.

5:10 That game wore me out. I like the Colts, but I like the Saints more, so I was glad to see them win. I enjoyed the game and the ads. Nantz and Simms did a fine job. I’m going to go take a nap now.

Got to love this commercial. Poor Betty White (or Abe Vigoda). But the lesson is truly clear: “If you don’t want to play like a geriatric Golden Girl, have a Snickers.”

word

ebullient [i-buhl-yuhnt, i-bool-] adj. 1. overflowing with fervor, enthusiasm, or excitement; high-spirited: The award winner was in an ebullient mood at the dinner in her honor 2. bubbling up like a boiling liquid

birthday

Samuel Butler (1612), John Ruskin (1819), William Tecumseh Sherman (1820), Jules Verne (1828), Kate Chopin (1850), Lana Turner (1921), Jack Lemmon (1925), Neal Cassady (1926), James Dean (1931), John Williams (1932), Ted Koppel (1940), Nick Nolte (1941), Robert Klein (1942), Mary Steenburgen (1953), John Grisham (1955), Vince Neil (1961), Joshua Kadison (1963), Gary Coleman (1968), Mary McCormack (1969), Seth Green (1974)

standpoint

I’m a football fan but not a huge one. I halfheartedly participate in two (2) fantasy leagues and have a moderate interest in my hometown Philadelphia Eagles, but I’m much less emotionally invested in the NFL than I let on. Most years, I watch the Super Bowl more out of some misplaced obligation to some archaic sense of manhood. But I didn’t feel the same way this year. I actually had a mildly strong desire to watch last night because I like both the Indianapolis Colts and the New Orleans Saints, along with their respective quarterbacks, Peyton Manning and Drew Brees.

But I was curious to see how Super Bowl XLIV would be a different experience for me. And, lucky for you, I chronicled it. Here goes.

Note: I was reasonably sure that the Colts would win and cover the spread (+5.5) and the over (57 pts.) would become a matter of fact.

Pregame

» Not going to lie, I watched golf until just about the start of the game so I didn’t get to see what inane crap led up to the actual footage from Miami.

» But I did tune in time to see the Colts get introduced onto the field to the same song by The Who that opens up every episode of CSI:Miami, which turned out to be all of The Who I needed.

» Queen Latifah sang America The Beautiful with a choir and musical accompaniment. It didn’t really work all that well. Looked like she was never really in sync. Carrie Underwood sang The Star-Spangled Banner and it was better. During all this, cameras were on Peyton Manning, who looked amped to the point he was cursing the fact Francis Scott Key and Katharine Bates were ever born.

» The next class of inductees to the Pro Football Hall of Fame were introduced as honorary whatevers to the coin toss. Emmitt Smith was the honorary coin tosser. Saints called heads. Smith flipped the coin directly at the Saints players, who sidestepped it. It was heads. Saints got the ball.

1st Quarter – 6:20(ish) PM

» Betty White and Abe Vigoda starred in a clever ad for Snickers. I’m completely sure those two actors were used because about 99% of viewers thought both had died years ago.

» The ad for the Boost Mobile Shuffle, featuring prominent members of the 1985 Super Bowl Champion Chicago Bears, was awful.

» In keeping with Hollywood’s trend of recycling, there’s another Robin Hood movie coming out starring Russell Crowe. Looks like both Braveheart and Gladiator ate a bunch of bows and arrows and vomited on each other. I’ll probably go see it.

» First quarter came to a close. Colts-10. Saints-0. I wasn’t paying much attention to the actual game.

2nd Quarter – 7:00 PM

» Pretty fast 1st quarter. At this point, I was certain the Colts were going to run away with the game.

» A Cars.com ad came on, detailing the life of a boy genius type doing all sorts of amazing boy genius type stuff. But when it came time to buy a car, he was at a loss. He looked to his mobile device for answers and, you guessed it, Cars.com came to the rescue. At one point during the ad, the boy genius delivered a baby Bengal tiger while on safari. That kicked off a conversation between my girlfriend and I where we discussed her desire to bring a baby panther into the apartment. Negotiations reached a stalemate after she refused to budge on the name of the baby panther. Oh well.

» The Saints began to make a game of it. Pretty sure they kicked a field goal.

» One ad had Jay Leno, Oprah Winfrey and David Letterman on the same couch talking about something. I’m not sure what because I was distracted. Leno didn’t look like he was actually there. The next ad (maybe) had Brett Favre making fun of the fact he never actually retires. I like it when celebrities/athletes know to do that.

» The Colts stopped the Saints on a 4th and goal from the 1-yard line with less than 2 minutes remaining in the half. See? I pay mind to the important stuff.

» I wasn’t quite sure how it happened but the Saints kick another field goal just as time expires on the 1st half. Colts – 10. Saints – 6.

Halftime – 7:50 PM

» The Who played. The Who sucked. I monitored Twitter feeds instead. Best Tweet? “Wake up your great grandma. The Who is on.”

3rd Quarter – 8:22 PM

» The Saints began the 2nd half with an onside kick. Which they recovered. Which turned out to be huge. Saints – 13. Colts – 10.

» According to a new Volkswagen ad, the classic car game, Punch Buggy, has now been expanded to include the entire Volkswagen fleet. As a matter of fact, it seems whatever substance it’s painting its cars with nowadays is so cutting edge, even Stevie Wonder can see it. Much to the chagrin of an arm sore Tracy Morgan. Classic.

» The Colts’ Joseph Addai ran in for a touchdown. Colts – 17. Saints – 13. I was a little disappointed about how good of a game it was becoming. I’m not used to the Super Bowl being about the Super Bowl. Not being able to run out of the room in between commercials was messing with my head.

» Two commercials gave me pause in different ways. First, the new E*TRADE baby wasn’t half as funny as the original. Second, Google aired its first ever television ad. I think.

» The Saints kicked another field goal which flew under my radar. End of the 3rd quarter. Colts – 17. Saints – 16.

4th Quarter – 8:56 PM

» Honestly, I should’ve been playing closer attention. The Saints started scoring. They took the lead. They intercepted a very important Peyton Manning pass at a crucial time. I watched the whole thing. I swear. But, as happens more than not, I became embroiled in a debate that made the game take a backseat.

» Super Bowl XLIV ended at 9:45 PM. The New Orleans Saints beat the Indianapolis Colts by the score of 31-17. If I bet the game the way I thought it would go, I would’ve been dead wrong. Yet another reason why I’m not a gambling man.

Overall, a most exhilarating football contest. The best Super Bowl in years. Congrats, New Orleans. Call me when you’re done partying. That should be around June.

quotation

Everybody gets told to write about what they know. The trouble with many of us is that at the earlier stages of life we think we know everything- or to put it more usefully, we are often unaware of the scope and structure of our ignorance. ↔ Thomas Pynchon

tune

One band from the 80s that doesn’t get enough credit is The Housemartins. I like to think of them as a sort of catchier version of  The Smiths. Also, they’ve got one of the best titled songs ever – “The People Who Grinned Themselves To Death.” Actually, after just listening to it, it seems to work nowadays as well.

gallimaufry

→ I just got done reading King of Russia: A Year in the Russian Super League, and it was simple and great. Former NHL head coach and current Phoenix Coyotes assistant coach Dave King narrates his experiences as the first ever Canadian coach in Russia. The guy really knows his stuff and he provides great insight into Russian hockey and its players, especially Pittsburgh Penguins superstar Evgeny Malkin.

→ Speaking of the Pittsburgh Penguins, yesterday afternoon’s game between them and the Washington Capitals was just about as complete as you could ask for. Caps won it in overtime 5-4 after being down 4-2 going into the third period.

Copyright 2010 National Football League. Media use only.

Super Bowl XLIV was quite an event, both in terms of sports and advertising.  We are still dumbfounded about why Microsoft did not take the opportunity to play off the roman numerals this year to promote XBox LIVE.  But hey, our pet idea… not theirs.  The moment has passed.

This year’s commercials fell into one of four categories: “Pain is Funny,” “Naked is Amusing,” “Concept Ridden to Death” or “WTF is this doing on the Super Bowl?”  Spots, this year, ranged from $2.5 million to $3 million.  The first half definitely has our vote as the funniest half in a long time.  The first Dorito’s Crash the Superbowl ads brought a bit of relief in last year’s game, which was quite unfunny.  Even with this year’s entries, “Money Out the Wazoo” still holds a special place in our hearts.

Instead of trying to talk about all the commercials until we are blue in the face, here are our top three picks in each category.

Top 3: Pain Is Funny!

1) Snicker’s – Betty White: There is nothing funnier, or more hilarious to watch, than Betty White getting tackled in the mud and then exclaiming, “come on man, you’ve been riding me all day.”  When Betty’s girlfriend brings in the Snickers bar, Betty turns back into a guy and all is well.  The message: You aren’t yourself when you are hungry.  The commercial ends with an old guy (Abe Vigoda) getting tackled.   Painfully funny…

2) Dorito’s – Kid’s Rules: Children of single parents, especially hot ones, or hot mommas will appreciate this one.  Guy walks in to take “momma” on a date.  Guy checks out “momma.”  Kid catches guy checking out “momma” (and his bowl of Dorito’s) and lays down the rules.  The commercial really starts rolling as soon as the kid slaps the guy.  The rest you will just have to see.

3) Dorito’s – Underdog: “If you want the Dorito’s, you have to speak.”  See what the dog does to retaliate.  Oh yes, revenge and human pain are very funny.

Top 3: Naked Is Amusing!

1) Careerbuilder – Casual Fridays: Let’s just say if Casual Friday was really like this, it would get very distracting.  It would also get very gross.  Mandatory Casual Fridays like this, yeah we’d have to quit too.

2) Dockers – Wear the Pants:  Almost like an answer to Casual Fridays, Wear the Pants comes in immediately after with a field full of men who seem to have forgotten their pants.  Do we see a trend?

3) KGB – Sumo: What is “I Surrender” in Japanese?  KGB can tell you.  Of course, in the meantime you will be standing there shirtless in a Sumo diaper.

Top 3: Concept Ridden to Death

1) Go Daddy Girls: So you got banned one Super Bowl.  Now you are riding these “see what happens” commercials to the grave.

2) ETrade Babies: Enough, we’re done.  It’s Geico’s Cavemen retread with babies.  Babies jealous about other babies?  Come on.

3) Coca-Cola – General Weirdness: We are so tired of the high concept branded soda commercial.  No wonder the actor was sleep-walking.  He was bored too.

Top 3: WTF Is THIS Doing on the Super Bowl?

1) Sketchers Shape Ups: We seriously thought this was a local cable spot until someone told us otherwise.  According to a major agency ad executive, who is tightly connected with PopTwist, the agency that did this spot should be “beaten, skinned alive, then dunked in ammonia and then shot in the shoulder and left to die for airing that commercial.”  The spot was off brand, badly concepted and atrociously executed.  Spend the money you plopped down on three Super Bowl spots and buy only two spots.  Use the money from the third one to get yourself a new agency.

2) Hyundai Sonata: This was just another boring car commercial.  Seriously, why spend all the money to read the definition of the word “Sonata” from the dictionary?

3) Audi A3 TDI – Green Police:  Green is good!  We are generally pro-green.  But arresting people for using plastic bottles, sitting in a hot tub, having the “wrong” light bulbs?   You were probably trying to be cute.  But showing a police state where everyone who doesn’t comply with the “green way” gets arrested is just wrong for the Super Bowl.  You have alienated about half of your audience, you know, the people who prefer plastic over paper and don’t like the idea of getting arrested for it.

What were your favorites?  Which commercials did you hate?  Shout back.

Again there were lots of great commercials this Super Bowl but this is the first time I get to blog about them. Let me start off by saying GoDaddy.com is dead last just because I hate GoDaddy commercials so very much. Congratulations to the New Orleans Saints! The better team won even though the interception looked choreographed.

Ten Favorite Super Bowl Commercials 2010

1. Betty White – Abe Vigoda Snickers

2. Young Son Doritos

3. NCIS Headslap

4. Dog Collar Doritos

5. Bud Lite Party Right

6. Oprah, Jay and Dave Letterman

7. Brett Favre – Hyundai Sonota

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Even though Western history often excludes the accomplishments of historical Black individuals, often the truth can be found handed down from generation to generation in other societies. African traditions teach that Makeda, the Queen of Sheba, circa 960 BC, was a Black woman. Makeda and the King of Israel, Solomon. The Queen of Sheba became curious with King Solomon’s reign and paid a state visit to him that lasted for months. That would be like President Obama visiting a county with a female leader and staying there for months. Eventually King Solomon and the Queen of Sheba became lovers.

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I heard the Superbowl was today. I don’t really care. I don’t like sports, Television or commercials. I went to an indie rock benefit concert instead.

Look at this great sign the promoters made for the event. I’m sure if Abe Vigoda saw this it would make him happy. That while 40% of all Americans with television sets were watching him and Betty White in a snickers commercial (1), we little Indie kids were busy fighting cancer instead.

I’m surprised that no one has updated Abe’s wikipedia page yet. Maybe I’ll take a few minutes and do that right now.

Update: 6:02 p.m.  I just updated the wikipedia page. It’s not the easiest task, they require that you be v v thorough and understand some coding.

The first band I saw play at the benefit show was the Cowabunga Babes and this girl I know who lives in Austin now was their drummer. I didn’t even know she played drums until I saw her sitting there in her cute flower print dress wearing a big happy grin on her face, which I caught on camera.

This guy standing in front of me was wearing these stellar Fred Perry shoes. I love Fred Perry. I had a Fred Perry jacket that I left at a party once. The girl who’s house it was stole it. I kept calling her to get it but she never called me back. It sucked. I really liked that jacket, like, a lot. I guess that’s what happens when you get drunk and forget your things places, which hasn’t happened to me in a very long time. Maybe it’s time to reward myself with a new Fred Perry jacket and matching shoes.

Hope you had a really awesome Superbowl Sunday! Here’s that clip of Abe Vigoda and Betty White in case you missed it.

References:

1.  SuperbowlMondays.com. A really weird site dedicated to making Superbowl Sunday a national Holiday. Becuase, you know, Haiti’s got a lot of support already and this is important too! Accessed Feb. 7th, 2010.

OK, I was thrilled that New Orleans Saints defeated the Indianapolis Colts by a score of 31–17, earning their first Super Bowl win. But I was more interested in the commercial during the Super Bowl.

Here were my two favorite commercials:

Snickers commercial – Betty White and Abe Vigoda

Budweiser ad featuring the relationship between a Clydesdale and a Longhorn steer

Half the fun of watching the Super Bowl is watching commercials. What were your favorites?

Superbowl Sunday is definitely one of my favorite days of the year.  I’ve been planning the big day for weeks.  Then I saw the flyer for this event breaking in the stage at the brand new art gallery/venue/performance space at 4316 Melrose Ave. called The Strange.  No Age…Vivian Girls…Abe Vigoda…Best Coast…Darker My Love…on the same day…at the same show…all for just $10!  I can’t think of a better curated lineup.  But when I realized this was on Superbowl Sunday…I was devastated.  There was no way I was missing the Superbowl…but there was no way I was missing this show.

Then….I read the fine print.  The game was to be shown on a big screen TV at the show!!  Along with free beer, food, and these awesome cats “jockeying the discs”:

Keith Morris (Circle Jerks)
Jim Smith (The Smell)
Sean Carlson (FYF Fest)
Jimmy Jamz (Brother Reade)
Jennifer Clavin (Mika Miko)
Jessie Clavin (Mika Miko)
Jesspeleta (Neverever)
Heather Gram (Pearl Harbor)
Blaque Chris (duh)

and Special Guest MCs…
Josh Fadem and Preston Olson

I’ve had some pretty awesome Superbowl shindigs, but I don’t think Superbowl Sunday gets any better than this! 

The Superbowl….and Rock and Roll.   Epic.

Click here for tickets…..if they’re not already sold out!

Live and Love,

The Hangman

Abe Vigoda – “Dead City / Waste Wilderness” (MP3/download from Skeleton cassette tape; FANTASTIC)
Abe Vigoda – “Lantern Lights” (MP3, also from Skeleton)

If Abe Vigoda were a shotgun, they’d be locked and loaded and pointed at yr head.

If Abe Vigoda were a grapefruit, they’d be ripe and sweet-sour and on sale.

If Abe Vigoda were a movie, they’d be Joe Pesci in Goodfellas, because they “wow” you then stab you in the face.

Abe Vigoda are tour guides for post-post-punk. Whereas most bands take you to the same old destinations, AV show you the back alleys, the bloodstains in secret corners of apartment buildings, the old opium dens and the relics of crime few even know about any more.

Pull the curtain back from their genius and it’s all pretty simple: Riff, rhythm, rowdy, random, RIPPIN’ … that’s essentially the formula. A host of modern bands lend a hand, including:

• The Smell compatriots No Age;
• Slaraffenland’s chanting and guitarpeggios;
• Liars‘ disaffected, disinterested-sounding (which is actually much more interesting than sounding interested) drone-rock;
• Fellow post-punkers like Clip’d Beaks, Deerhunter and Each Other;
• Swell Maps’/Epic Soundtracks‘ anything-goes attitude;
• Post-everything rockers like Portugal. The Man, Dirty Projectors …
• Groups on the harder edge of the spectrum like Shearing Pinx and Pissed Jeans;
• Jay Reatard (RIP);
• Hell, throw a little Minus The Bear and Animal Collective in there, for flavor;

There’s more, but I’ll make you hunt for it yrself. Skeleton is a tape Abe Vigoda made for sooo-hot-right-now Not Not Fun Records and it smokes just about everything else I’ve heard lately. These guys mean business. They’re flooding the world with material both vinyl and cassette, have carved a distinctive niche in Los Angeles and sit atop the Smell bandwagon.

What else is there to do? Keep FIGHTing, that’s what. Skeleton is a charge ahead, a denial of the posturing and the appropriation of the indie rockers of today, a statement that says, “We can stick with the punk-rock set-up and deliver something wackier than anything you can fry up on a synth stove.”

While groups like Matmos and AC are doing interesting things in the digital realm, hearing a band having so much fun with the standard guitar-bass-drums-vocals template is absolutely divine, a kick in the pants with a steel-toe work boot.

Don’t sleep on this shit. Abe Vigoda are incapable of producing non-events, immune to the instantly recognizable influences so rampant in intense brands of rock these days, true flag-wavers like Drive Like Jehu before them and Black Lips concurrent to them.

And the cassette tape: Is there anything more beautiful? Seriously, I need a moment here …