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Questions re the oral contraceptive pill answered.

L’Orient le Jour

Le taux d’abandon de l’école parmi les jeunes réfugiés palestiniens au Liban est très élevé, avec 50% des adolescents de 17 ans qui ne bénéficient pas d’éducation scolaire, s’est alarmée vendredi l’ONU.

Nous tirons la sonnette d’alarme sur le fait que le taux d’abandon est trop élevé parmi les enfants en âge d’être scolarisés”, a déclaré à Beyrouth Ray Virgilio Torres, chef du Fonds des Nations unies pour l’enfance (Unicef) au Liban. L’Unicef publiait vendredi un rapport sur le sujet à l’occasion du 20e anniversaire de la Convention internationale des droits de l’enfant. M. Torres a expliqué que près de 15% des enfants âgés de 7 à 17 ans résidant dans les douze camps de réfugiés du pays et dans des zones de regroupements de Palestiniens hors des camps avaient quitté l’école. Un tiers de ces enfants sont illettrés, selon le rapport. “Ce chiffre est vraiment inquiétant quand vous considérez que la moitié des enfants âgés de 17 ans et 40% de ceux âgés de 16 ans ont abandonné l’école”, a indiqué M. Torres. “C’est un âge sensible, et si vous ajoutez cela à d’autres risques auxquels ils sont exposés dans les camps, il y a des raisons de s’alarmer.” Le responsable de l’Unicef indique que la plupart des enfants abandonnent l’école en raison de la pauvreté, du manque de programmes scolaires appropriés et de perspectives quant à leur avenir. “Les jeunes disent pourquoi étudier quand, après, je ne peux pas travailler”, a dit M. Torres. La loi libanaise interdit aux réfugiés palestiniens d’exercer la plupart des métiers et de posséder des propriétés. M. Torres a indiqué qu’un autre facteur inquiétant était le taux de travail parmi les jeunes réfugiés palestiniens qui s’élève à 6,1%, des garçons pour la plupart. “Ce chiffre est trop élevé si vous le comparez à ceux des pays développés où le travail des enfants a pratiquement disparu.”

Entre 250 000 et 270 000 réfugiés palestiniens vivent au Liban. La majorité provient de familles arrivées en 1948 après la création de l’État d’Israël.

If your teen constantly complains of headaches, it may be more than an excuse to skip school.  The onset of migraines can coincide with the start of puberty, and a study reveals that they affect more than 2 million kids in the U.S. “We hope that if we treat adolescents, then these kids won’t have more frequent headaches when they’re adults,’ says Paul winner, D.O., director of the Palm Beach Headache Center in West Palm Beach, Florida.  If your teen doesn’t get relief from pain within two hours of taking an over-the-counter medicine, make an appointment with his doctor or a headache specialist (find one at achenet.org). – Bethany Gumper

Besides the professional info you can see at LinkedIn, here are a few things:

~ My own two healthy teens are 19 and 16 ~ and we actually enjoy each other these days

~ I am not a grandmother, but I was bumped up a generation when I became a great-aunt last year

~ I am beginning to realize that our early interests never really disappear: I read my first book on parenting when I took care of 3 cousins for 10-12 hours a day the summer I was 15 years old! Not saying that’s necessarily a good thing, but very indicative of things to come!

“A novel … does not come into the first class unless it contains some person whom one can thoroughly love, and if it be a pretty woman, all the better.”
– Charles Darwin, as quoted in Charles and Emma

The winners of the 2009 National Book Awards will be announced Wednesday, and the finalists in the category of young people’s literature include Deborah Heiligman’s captivating Charles and Emma: The Darwins’ Leap of Faith (Holt, 268 pp., $18.95). This dual biography is a portrait of the loving marriage of the author of The Origin of Species and his spirited and intelligent wife, who held religious views he did not share.

This excerpt describes how Charles and Emma Darwin spent their first days in their new home in London after their wedding at a Staffordshire church on January 29, 1839:

“In their first few days together, they mostly stayed in – it was snowing. But they also did some shopping for furniture, dishes, and clothes, including a morning gown for Emma. It was ‘a sort of clarety-brown satin,’ she wrote to [her sister] Elizabeth, and she felt it was ‘very unobjectionable.’ They borrowed some novels from the library, starting a lifelong tradition of reading together – usually Emma read to Charles while he rested from his work. Charles liked novels with happy endings, and he once wrote, ‘I often bless all novelists. A surprising number have been read aloud to me … and I like all if moderately good, and if they do not end unhappily – against which a law ought to be passed. A novel, according to my taste, does not come into the first class unless it contains some person whom one can thoroughly love, and if it be a pretty woman all the better.”

An earlier post on Charles and Emma has links to more information about the book.

The publisher recommends Charles and Emma for ages 13 and up — perhaps because of occasional mature content, such as the passing use of the word “erection” — but it may also appeal to younger children who are strong readers.

Note: Since I posted this, a visitor has pasted into comment #1 a good short video about this book that lets you hear Claudette Colvin and see some of the excellent archival photos in the book. You can watch it without leaving this site. Jan

CLAUDETTE COLVIN: Twice Toward Justice. By Phillip Hoose. FSG/Melanie Kroupa, 133 pp., $19.95. 10 and up.

By Janice Harayda

Claudette Colvin brings down from the attic of American history a life that deserves a place on its front porch. The judges for the National Book Awards will announce on Wednesday whether this 2009 finalist is, in their view, the year’s best book of young people’s literature. It is certainly one of the most inspiring.

Beginning in late 1955, tens of thousands of black residents of the Alabama capital refused to ride the city’s buses after the police arrested Rosa Parks for not giving up her seat to a white passenger. The Montgomery bus boycott lasted until the U.S. Supreme Court affirmed a lower court’s ruling in Browder v. Gayle that segregated buses were unconstitutional. The decision strengthened the civil-rights movement and the career of the young pastor of the Dexter Avenue Baptist Church in Montgomery who had encouraged the protesters to remain nonviolent, Martin Luther King Jr.

A plaintiff in Browder v. Gale was Claudette Colvin, an intelligent and strong-willed teenager from a family who lived in one of the poorest sections of the city. Nine months before Parks took her historic stand, Colvin was arrested and jailed after she refused to give up her seat to a white woman on a Montgomery bus. At the age of 15, Colvin had studied black history in school and idolized the abolitionist Harriet Tubman. So she did not go gently, as Parks did, when ordered her to yield her seat. As the police dragged her backwards off the bus, she screamed, “It’s my constitutional right!”

But while Parks became famous, Colvin remains little known. Phillip Hoose shows the injustice of that neglect in this fascinating story of her early years – much of it told in her words — that combines oral history and pictorial biography. Colvin’s memories of growing up in segregated Montgomery are at times almost heartbreaking in their understatement. “My mother had always said, ‘If you can even talk to a white person without lowering your eyes you’re really doing something,’” Colvin recalls. And such comments are enriched by well-chosen black-and-white archival photos, including a copy of a Jim Crow–era sign that says: “NO DOGS NEGROS [SIC] MEXICANS.”

Claudette Colvin leaves unanswered many questions about Colvin’s later life, apparently because some events were too painful for her to discuss. But anyone would prefer to have this fine story of her life than none at all.

“The wonderful thing which you have just done makes me feel like a craven coward,” a man in Sacramento wrote to Colvin after hearing that police had arrested for her staying in a bus seat she had paid for. “How encouraging it would be more adults had your courage, self respect and integrity.” Indeed, it would.

Best line: One of many memorable details of life under Jim Crow laws, in Colvin’s words: “We could shop in white stores – they’d take our money all right – but they wouldn’t let us try anything on … When [my sister] and I needed shoes, my mom would trace the shape of our feet on a brown paper bag and we’d carry the outline to the store because we weren’t allowed to try the shoes on.”

Worst line: None.

Read an excerpt from Claudette Colvin.

Furthermore: Claudette Colvin is a finalist for the 2009 National Book Award for young people’s literature. the winner will be announced on Nov. 18, and the prize sponsor has posted more on the book on its Web site.

About the author: Hoose’s other books include Perfect, Once Removed, a memoir of the summer when his cousin Don Larsen pitched a perfect game in the World Series.

You can also follow janiceharayda (@janiceharayda) on Twitter www.twitter.com/janiceharayda, which may have other comments on the National Book Award finalists.

© 2009 Janice Harayda. All rights reserved.
www.janiceharayda.com

This is an area that is important regardless of a child’s developmental history, socioeconomic status, gender, or race.  As parents, we watch as our children are generally so carefree and assured, with the slightest compliments effectively reinforcing their every move.  Then we have to let them go at some point; to go away from the safety and comfort of our homes, and enter into the land of school.  We now don’t have any control over who they will meet or how they will be treated.  We must simply wait and pick up the pieces as we try and put on our best ‘poker face’ listening with angst, guilt, and anger (among other emotions) to our child recount being teased earlier that day.  I used to believe, perhaps hope, that self-esteem was not at risk until the junior high/middle school years, or what I like to call: “the years in which all kids should either hibernate or be allowed to stay home until maturity sets in.”

Unfortunately now I know better.  Self-esteem is at risk the moment a child enters preschool or daycare.  It just looks different.  Kids as young as preschool age can be heard telling each other, ‘I don’t want to be your friend,” or “I don’t like you.”  I recently listened to one of my colleagues recount how when her son was younger he came home one day and told her, “Johnny told me that he didn’t want to be my friend!”  She recalled how she bit her lip and was ready to give him a big hug as he was surely on the verge of tears.  She put her ‘poker face’ on and asked her son, “What did you say?”  Her son responded in a matter-of-face tone, “Who cares!?”

There has to be something to that response.  Some kids are simply born with a suit of armor that can repel these meaningless comments while others are devastated at the very thought of anyone not liking them.  Self-esteem begins to be chipped away each day in school whether a child is having a difficult time with math, or reading, or friendships, or basically anything that the child begins to internalize as making them ‘defective’ or ‘flawed’ in any way.  This is the same reason why the notion of a child being deemed ‘lazy’ by their teacher is ridiculous.  Kids are absolutely devastated when they cannot keep up in class, don’t answer a question correctly, take longer than their peers to complete an assignment or test…the list goes on and on…  You tell me how that is lazy.

So what is self-esteem and how can we help our kids achieve and maintain it?  My favorite definition comes from a pioneer in the field of psychology, William James.  He defined self-esteem with the following equation: Self-Esteem = Success/Pretensions (or Success divided by Pretensions).

Pretensions are viewed as goals, purposes, or aims, whereas Successes constitute the perception of the attainment of those goals.  Thus, we essentially decide in our own minds when we have achieved success based on our own expectations for that success.  When self-esteem begins to suffer is when an individual comes up short in his or her perception of reaching a particular goal, especially when the individual compares his or her achievement of a goal against the achievement of others.   So, for the child who either tells himself (or hears it from his parents) that he must get straight A’s and then gets a ‘B’ in gym class only to be outdone by one of his academic rivals, self-esteem has just taken a ‘hit.’   Whereas the child who really struggles in gym class and has lower expectations but eventually achieves a ‘B’ in the class may have a rise in self-esteem.

The bottom line, which is as important for adults as it is for kids, is that we have to have multiple ‘columns’ or ‘pillars’ of support to our self-esteem.  If we rest all of our esteem on how well we do in school and then do lousy on a test, then we are in trouble.  This is why I strongly encourage kids to pursue a variety of interests beginning in middle school even if they only end up liking a few things.  I don’t expect that they will like everything they try, but having at least a few new interests to add to the old can insulate them down the road if just one of their previous interests does not go well.

Imagine that I, a pediatric psychologist, enter a contest and win the opportunity to throw out the first pitch at a baseball game.  I practice a little so that I don’t embarrass myself on the big day and then the day arrives.  I step up on the mound, try a bit of a wind up, and throw a wild pitch that sends the catcher scrambling and draws jeers from the fans.  It’s all in good fun and I laugh it off.  Why don’t I hang my head and beat myself up about this?  Why hasn’t my self-esteem suffered?  Well, for starters I am not a trained professional pitcher so why should I be expected to throw an accurate pitch from that distance?  But what if I were and I performed the same way?  Then my self-esteem might be in jeopardy because my pretensions are different.

The young boy I discussed earlier comes to mind.  As a psychologist, my reaction to my wild pitch can safely be “who cares?”  There are plenty of other things I do well and my pretensions for throwing the ball well were low.  As a result, not achieving success was okay.  This is exactly why we need to have multiple pillars of support.  If my entire self-concept is tied up in how knowledgeable and helpful I am as a psychologist, and a child comes to see me that I can’t seem to get through to, then I might beat myself up and question my competence.  However, if I go home to my family that night and watch as my daughter runs to greet me and play with me, I am reminded that there is more to me and my self-concept than what I do at work.  Adults as much as kids run into this problem and it gets them into big trouble.  The workaholic father, for example, who is so angry with his family every night because the he can never truly be successful at work due to his extremely high pretensions.  His goals are too lofty and as a result he cannot find happiness in other areas…work is his only pillar of esteem and he has little energy left for much else.  Kids need to be reminded multiple times each day of their lives to find successes in what they do and increase the chance of that by doing a variety of different things.  A bad day at school is only devastating when the pretensions of how school should go are set too high.

Often what I worry about with the kids I treat is that they have suffered too many losses of esteem and don’t like the feeling anymore.  As a result, they fall into the cycle of avoidance.  Indeed, in their minds they think: With no attempt there can be no failure; with no failure no humiliation.

So our self-feeling in this world depends entirely on what we back ourselves to be and do. It is determined by the ratio of our actualities to our supposed potentialities; a fraction of which our pretensions are the denominator and the numerator is our success: thus…

Self-Esteem = Success/Pretensions.  Self-esteem is ultimately increased by increasing our successes in life while also decreasing our pretensions.  I would strongly encourage all of us to keep our pretensions realistic and not depend on too much success in any one particular area of our lives.  The more we spread it out, the safer we are or the more intact our self-esteem remains.  Keep your options varied and open and don’t lose sight of what you are good at, even when you had a bad day and one of your columns of support happened to collapse on that particular day.

Dr. Mark Bowers is a Licensed Pediatric Psychologist and Autism/Anxiety expert at the Ann Arbor Center for Developmental & Behavioral Pediatrics in Ann Arbor, Michigan.

© 2009 Mark Bowers, Ph.D.

]]> http://thejuma.wordpress.com/2009/11/10/time-together/ Tue, 10 Nov 2009 15:01:31 +0000 el burro http://thejuma.wordpress.com/2009/11/10/time-together/

It can be tricky to find times to connect with all four of the kids every day, especially the older two, who are so busy with their own lives.

Which is why I get up a full hour before I really have to.

I set the alarm before the sun gets up so that I can wake R. He could set his own alarm, and make his own breakfast, and he’d be out of the house and off to the uni. before the little ones even got out of bed, but he asks me to wake him. Every morning I go down to the kitchen, put the kettle on, then go down to the basement grotto where he has his adolescent den before heading back to my room to get my running stuff on.

We meet at the kitchen table after he has his shower, and we read the paper together.

Very often nothing is said. He’s not much of a morning person. Or a talker.

But words probably aren’t what he’s after.

J’ai toujours pensé que Google avait une certaine censure dans son programme Google Adwords.

Je peux vous dire une chose.  Soit qu’il y en a et qu’elle est mal appliquée ou soit qu’il y en a pas dutout.

En cherchant l’expresson “resto hot” dans Google ce matin je suis tombé sur une pub qui disait “Scènes HARDS X Gratuites”.  Je vous épargne les détails du site en destination “Sucez-moi” quelque chose dans son URL.

Disons que je n’aimerais pas voir des jeunes et des ados tombés sur pareil site via une publicité vue dans Google.

Je suis déçu du programme Adwords de Google.

Background: There is accumulating evidence that adolescents with specific language impairment (SLI) have impairments in domains beyond formal language that may affect academic and social outcomes. The findings of previous studies as well as parent reports of behavioural concerns suggest that they lag behind peers in functions such as self-regulation of verbal behaviour and strategic language use suggesting that executive function may be a potential domain worthy of study in adolescents with SLI. The evaluation of executive functions in daily living could provide critical information for intervention for adolescents with SLI, and also inform studies of the relationship between language and executive functioning in a developing system.

Aims: To compare ratings of executive function in adolescents with specific language impairment to those of their parents and typically developing peers.

Methods & Procedures: This study examined parent and self-ratings of executive function in adolescents with SLI and typically developing peers. Twenty-one adolescents with SLI and 21 age- and gender-matched peers (age range = 11-18 years) rated their executive functions in daily living using the Behavior Rating Inventory of Executive Function — Self-Report Form (BRIEF-SR), and their parents provided companion ratings.

Outcomes & Results: Adolescents in both groups rated themselves more positively than did their parents, and the presence of language impairment was associated with more negative ratings by both parents and adolescents. Fifty-seven per cent of the parents of adolescents with SLI rated their child’s executive function abilities as being in the clinically impaired range, compared with 10% in the typically developing group.

Conclusions & Implications: The results of this study suggest that many adolescents with SLI have perceived impairments in executive functions that affect their performance in daily living. What remains to be determined is whether language and executive function impairments are co-morbid conditions or causally linked. Few assessment tools address the unique characteristics of adolescent clinical populations, including those with SLI. These findings suggest that self- and parent ratings of executive function may offer useful information for treatment planning. A greater understanding of the relation of executive functions to language has important implications for the timing and content of therapeutic intervention.

from the International Journal of Language and Communication Disorders

459438     พฤติกรรมผิดปกติในเด็กและเยาวชน     Behavioral Disorder in Childhood and Adolescents

ชนิดของพฤติกรรมที่ผิดปกติ สาเหตุ การวินิจฉัย และการรักษาแบบต่างๆ

(The categories of abnormal behaviors. Various causes, analysis, and treatment.)

(459438 มหาวิทยาลัยเกษตรศาสตร์)

Street Sex Workers in Bangladesh are Very Mobile

-Mohammad Khairul Alam-
-Executive Director-
-Rainbow Nari O Shishu Kallyan Foundation-
-24/3 M. C. Roy Lane-
-Dhaka-1211, Bangladesh-
rainbowngo@gmail.com
www.newsletter.com.bd
Tell: 880-2-8628908
Mobile: 01722344997

Asia has one of the fastest rates of spread of HIV/AIDS infection in the world. At present, HIV/AIDS infection is still virtually nonexistent amongst most of these populations in Bangladesh. But it is extremely likely that once it is initiated, it will spread rapidly through these extended networks of risk. Prostitutes exist at significant levels in Bangladesh, India and Philippines, and condom use is minimal in these areas. In Bangladesh, sex workers in brothels as well as on the streets report rather high client turnover, by Asian standards. Sex workers contact around 19 clients per week on average and the ratio for the street workers is reported to be between 12 and 16 in different cities. Consistent use of condom is one of the lowest in the South Asia region.

The social exclusion of sex workers exacerbates the situation of the more vulnerable groups among them, such as minors, drug users, ethnic minorities or migrants, and finally the people who are under the total control of pimps and/or traffickers. All these groups face the pressure of repressive legislation, which often excludes them from the legal, social and health care facilities available to the general population. A prerequisite for the social inclusion of sex workers, including the above-mentioned groups, is the recognition and protection of their human and civil rights, irrespective of issues if they are migrant, local, drug-using or homosexual people.

Many women and girls from rural areas in developing countries feel it is their duty to migrate to urban areas to lessen the impoverished condition of their family. Some of them leave their familiar environment and live in the cities without much support. Theses women and girls who migrate are highly vulnerable to sexual exploitation, abuse or violence. This is where they are often exposed to high-risk situations for which they are not prepared to save themselves. These circumstances of instability and vulnerability often leave these female migrants easy prey to sexual exploitation and also very much vulnerable to HIV as a result.

Street sex workers in Bangladesh are very mobile. They typically work in one place for around a year before moving on to another location. In a survey conducted in Dhaka city by Rainbow Nari O Shishu Kallyan Foundation (2007), Floating/street sex workers interviewed were predominantly adolescent, illiterate, poor who come from rural areas. Street sex workers are at a heightened risk for acquiring HIV due to the fact that they go through multiple sexual contacts per night and rarely care about consistent use of condoms. Street sex workers, especially those new to the sex worker chain, are also very much vulnerable to HIV infection during their first six months of sex work, when they have minimal bargaining authority.

Due to the nature of their business – often as street gangs, overlooked by pimps – they are also a difficult group to educate and to be reached. Some NGOs, like the Rainbow Nari O Shishu Kallyan Foundation, have initiated livelihood training, through which they hope to provide these street girls with an alternative to prostitution. Consisting of education and awareness building programs in schools at the target areas, reaching out to students aged 15 and above, these programs are designed to give an overview of Reproductive Health, safe sexuality, STDs and HIV/AIDS awareness. But many of the street girls who end up on the training center at a very early age – 12 to14 years, would probably not benefit from the training program because there is a good chance that they might dropout from such program due to their frequent ratio of migration.

Behavioral change of men is essential to prevent unprotected sex as well as protecting commercial sex workers from physical violence. Because of their multiple sex partners and potential for HIV transmission through unprotected sex, sex workers are considered one of the highest risk groups for HIV. The Rainbow Nari O Shishu Kallyan Foundation found that floating sex workers with an average one year’s experience attend five clients per week. They work in diverse locations at night, most commonly in gardens, parks and terminal place, and also in the streets and markets. Many sex workers are faced with more immediate problems such as instability, loss of family environment, forced sex, violence, and social exclusion. Judging by all these aspects, this group does not emerge on a high position in our list of priorities to work with, because they are less likely to be found as a group.

Source: Rainbow Nari O Shishu Kallyan Foundation, UNAIDS, CARE, UNICEF

The Heath Behavior News Service has reported a study which found that plainer cigarette packages make smoking less appealing to teenagers.

Melanie Wakefield, Ph.D., who co-authored the Australian study, stated “We found that when branding is progressively removed from a cigarette pack, adolescents not only perceive the packs to be less attractive, they associate the brand with people who have less favorable attributes.”

Using three popular Australian cigarette brands, the researchers looked at how adolescents perceived cigarette packs and what their expectations were about cigarette taste. The packs showed a gradual diminishment of brand information on the front and a progressively larger-sized health warning. Researchers randomly assigned each teen to rate one of 15 pack conditions.

Click here for more information and to view the full article.

Children that have musculoskeletal problems (NMS) suffer physically and psychologically; preventing or interrupting their abilities to participate in sports and daily activities.  The inability to keep active plays a toll a child’s overall growth, emotional and physical well being now and through-out life.  A research study was performed in Germany by interviewing children and their parents about the number of children that complain of musculoskeletal problems. [1]  The percentages of children that have a NMS complaint is may surprise you:

• 749 children/adolescents were interviewed and 83% (622) had pain in the past 3 months
• 30.8% of these children/adolescents stated they had pain for more than 6 months

Inactivity of children/adolescents is a big problem with their ability to flourish.  This plays an important role in contributing to muscle weakness, decreased bone strength [2], decreased oxygen, obesity, decreased immune function and diabetes. [3]  It is very important to keep our children/adolescents active, but hard to do if they are in pain and cannot do the activities to promote health.

What can be done to decrease NMS pain in your child/adolescent and even yourself? See a Chiropractor in your community.  A Chiropractor adjusts the spine and other joints that are misaligned in order to better align them in order to decrease stress on the nervous system, the joint and the muscles/ligaments surrounding.

Do not let NMS pain prevent you from maintaining a healthy lifestyle.  It is amazing how many of the parents interviewed in the Germany study that were unaware of the pain or problems that were affecting their child.  Do not suffer anymore.  Contact a Chiropractor and experience the difference it will have in you, your child’s and your community’s life!

REFERENCES:

1. Pain among children and adolescents: restrictions in daily living and triggering factors, Pediatrics 2005 (Feb); 115 (2): e152-62

2. Peripheral bone mineral density and different intensities of physical activity in children 6-8 years old: the Copenhagen School Child Intervention study, Calcif Tissue Int 2007 (Jan); 80 (1): 31-8

3. A conceptual framework of frailty: a review, J Gerontol A Biol Sci Med Sci 2002 (May); 57 (5): M283-8

4. Recurrent Neck Pain and Headaches in Preadolescents Associated with Mechanical Dysfunction of the Cervical Spine: A Cross-Sectional Observational Study With 131 Students, J Manipulative Physiol Ther 2009 (Oct); 32 (8): 625-34

Bonjour à tous!

Bon bien je ne sais toujours pas si Moto-Men m’a démasquer, je vais faire l’Autruche, si jamais cela se présente, je serais franc.  Après tout il n’y a rien de vraiment compromettant…. J’avoue que d’Avoir sa vie affective au grand public c’est pas top, mais bon… Comme quelqu’un m’a dit, t’es comme ça! It’s so cool to be uncool….

Hier on a passé une belle soirée et ce soir il revient me voir.  Imaginez  que lundi je le boudais et il en faisait autant, je le voyais sur MSN et il me voyait.  J’avais décidé hier de ne pas le relancer parce que je le boudais parce qu’il m’Avait dit qu’il était incertain de notre relation.  Le pire c’est que nous avons discuté et il m’a dit qu’il ne me contactait pas parce qu’il attendait que je fasse les premiers pas… Tu parles de 2 adolescents…. C’est fou se que la peur peux faire, ce que l’insécurité du début d’une relation peut ammener….  Tous les prétextes sont bons pour s’éjecter.  Comme dirait Janette: ” la communication dans un couple est primordiale!”

Par ailleurs, saviez-vous que le nombre de visiteur dépasse le 1000 en ce moment, c’est donc dire qu’il y a des habitués…. Si vous avez la chance de distribuer l’Adresse, faite-le…. On sait jamais je pourrais en vivre et voyager en mettant de la pub: Priape, Trojan, ville de Montréal, social, Lavalive et voyager et vous informer de mes découvertes…. Faites-le on sais jamais…..

Concernant la cause de la Vilaine Charrue, je me cherche encore, pardon, je cherche encore…. Puisque tout a été dit et fait sur la planète, je dois chercher les trucs déjà existant? continuer à chercher des causes moins noble… Comme je suis idéaliste ça ne fonctionne pas, je dois viser le maximum, frapper fort…. En attendant je Blogue et reblogue….

Une idée pour Miss Peggy, vous connaissez dans Facebook des gars sexy Célibataire, envoyer le nom de la personne dans Facebook et on va matcher notre belle miss Peggy…  Je ne lâche pas on va la Matcher comme Cochonne Nationnale.   Et encore, si vous connaissez des gars sexy dans Facebook, envoyez-les nous! on va coter, ça vous tente?

Et vous avez-vous votre cause?

Bon Mardi.

Adolescence is a time for “sexploration.”  And with the click of a button, the internet has made it extremely easy to acquire information about sex and sexuality!  The internet has increasing become the primary source of sexuality education and information; leaving a generation of adolescents more confused, misinformed and unprepared for the consequences of receiving inaccurate or misleading messages about sexuality which unfortunately results in increasing teen pregnancy rates, increasing rates of sexually transmitted infections including HIV, abortions and/or mental and emotional damage. 

While I am all for the promotion of and accessibility to comprehensive sex education, I am not quite sure I can totally endorse the concept of adolescents totally relying on the internet as a means of receiving true comprehensive sex education.

My concerns are based on the accuracy and reliability of the information and material that may be posted on such “sex education” website. Teens need to have a reputable place to receive education and information about sexuality. Websites like www.beautifully-me.com, Coalition for Positive Sexuality or Planned Parenthood’s www.betterthansexed.org, website offers reliable education and information from a staff of qualified professional sex educators. In addition, Beautifully Me’s website offers readers an opportunity to receive answers to any questions they may have by contacting our professional sex coach via email or telephone. This is an important component to our online sexuality education website because it allows readers to gain clarity or clear up any misconceptions by immediately providing access to someone who is qualified to address their questions or concerns.  That way our reader leaves our site fully informed and empowered!

Another concern with online sex education websites is that the meta tags, which are designed to help users when searching for websites, could possibly be redirect a user to an sex porno, adult chat and/or adult sex & swinger website versus an educational sex website with material that is appropriate for adolescents usage which could potentially present a more dangerous situation for a vulnerable and uninformed adolescent.

Parents need to be aware that your teen maybe viewing some of these “sex education” websites. If you find that to be the case, visit the website yourself to ensure the integrity of the materials on the website.  Review the content of the website with your adolescent to ensure that they understand what they are reading. Use it as a great talking point to begin open and honest conversations about sex.  Remember it is not the responsibility of the internet to educate your adolescent about sexuality. If you are uncomfortable talking with your adolescent about sexuality, refer them to a qualified sex educator.

Si l’image choisie pour illustrer cet article contraste avec son contenu, c’est sans doute parce que cette photo a été prise dans un lieu où la présence de l’islam traditionnel est prégnante et culturellement installée.

Elle permet ainsi d’apprécier le contraste entre le sens que prend un discours lorsqu’il est tenu dans des contextes différents.

J’ai ainsi été particulièrement impressionné par deux articles parus récemment, l’un en carte blanche du journal “Le Soir” le 27 octobre dernier sous le titre “Femmes voilées: laissons-les en paix” et l’autre intitulé “Le voile, symptôme de la modernité” publié sur le réseau Voltaire.org ce 3 novembre.

Les deux articles me paraissent traiter la question du voile pour ce qu’elle est … la question du voile. Arrêtons d’utiliser toutes les formes de différences pour exorciser notre peur de l’autre. L’article du Soir me paraît remarquable en ce qu’il montre comment “les arguments invoqués pour persécuter le foulard sont d’une part aveugles à leur propre partialité et d’autre part trop peu sensibles aux conséquences qu’un brin de réflexion suffit à anticiper.”

Prenant ainsi l’exemple d’une “civilisation” dans laquelle il sied que les femmes portent jupes et talons aiguilles, et où si les hommes sortent “naturellement” torse nu sur les plages en été, il est loin d’en être de même des femmes, l’article montre  comment “Les critères de décence varient d’une culture à l’autre. Dans les sociétés libérales comme dans les sociétés musulmanes, la différenciation sexuelle de ces critères est la règle et manifeste des rapports de pouvoir complexes entre les sexes. L’obsession actuelle pour le foulard semble donc difficilement pouvoir échapper à l’objection des « deux poids, deux mesures ». Loin de défendre « nos valeurs », elle viole l’idéal de respect mutuel impartial dont se revendiquent nos démocraties libérales.’

La carte blanche adresse ensuite avec tout autant de pertinence la question de la liberté et celle des signes religieux, mettant bien en évidence qu’il ne nous revient pas de déterminer la liberté au nom d’un autre, mais que notre système éducatif devrait sans doute plus s’attacher à faire comprendre comment la liberté s’exerce. Sur la question religieuse, le débat est suffisamment ouvert que pour ne pas le trancher sans en être un expert.

L’article de la sociologue Tülay Umay sur voltaire.org commence par une remarque importante: au plus un état prend des mesures pour réduire la présence du voile, au plus celui-ci s’installe. Elle note aussi qu’il s’agit là d’un discours qui se substitue à la parole des femmes elles-mêmes. On estime d’ailleurs qu’il n’est pas nécessaire qu’elles parlent. Elles n’auraient rien à dire de spécifique. Elles ne seraient que de simples femmes porteuses de valeurs qui ne leur appartiennent pas, de valeurs qui seraient celles des hommes de leur communauté. Il n’y a fondamentalement pas de discours plus infantilisant et moins respectueux que celui qui se dit à la place de l’autre.

Dans le cadre de l’étude sociologique qu’elle a mené, Tülay Umay met en évidence qu’il apparaît que ce phénomène n’est pas d’ordre religieux, ni d’ordre communautaire. Lorsque l’on interroge ces jeunes femmes, ce qu’elles mettent en avant, c’est leur volonté propre, la démarche individuelle qu’elles ont faite. En fait, aujourd’hui le voile joue un rôle émancipateur paradoxal dans notre société: il est devenu présence du corps féminin, présence de la femme dans l’espace public.

Ces deux articles illustrent quelques principes fondamentaux de toute approche constructiviste et interactionnelle de la vie:

• celui selon lequel lorsque nous pensons disposer d’une solution qui a fonctionné dans certaines circonstances, nous pouvons l’appliquer avec succès à toute situation que nous jugeons similaire (un peu comme si on disait que puisque l’on peut contribuer à éradiquer l’extrême droite en interdisant les symboles nazis, on pourrait éradiquer le terrorisme islamiste en interdisant le voile). L’expérience ne fonctionnant pas, nous choisissons de faire “plus de la même chose”, pour finir par obtenir le contraire de ce que nous recherchions: en fin de parcours, des écoles ghettos risquent de voir le jour qui généreront elles des populations totalement déconnectées des valeurs fondamentales de notre société;
• lorsque nous interprétons les actes des autres, nous le faisons à travers notre propre système de valeur. Or, il n’existe pas de réalité objective en dehors du regard que les hommes pose sur cette réalité. Donc la réalité est toujours le fruit de la construction réflexive, et donc la “réalité objective” n’existe pas. Si nous n’acceptons pas de regarder chaque réalité par les yeux de ceux qui la vivent de la manière la plus intense, nous risquons de prendre des décisions dont nous ne mesurons pas toujours l’impact.

Toute cette approche respectueuse du point de vue de chacun devrait être au centre d’une approche médiatrice d’un conflit comme celui qui se pose aujourd’hui. Et si une décision juridique devait s’imposer dans le futur, la plus prudente serait sans doute celle qui permettrait à chacun de repartir à zéro, en reprenant le slogan de mai 68: “il est interdit d’interdire“. Le mérite principal d’un tel changement serait de couper radicalement l’herbe sous les pieds de tous les extrémistes qui essaient de tirer parti de ce faux débat.

A banda começou em 1980 e mesmo com muitos hiatos, infinitas trocas de membros e problemas com gravadoras e até com o próprio público, o grupo de punk Adolescents [ou The Adolescents] está na ativa até hoje. Os tiozões do punk ainda vivos continuam a tocar seu som punk, ora sujo, ora bem trabalho, mas sem nunca deixar de ser punk! E sempre influenciando novas bandas a surgirem, como The Offspring e Bad Religion. O primeiro cd deles foi o que basicamente se tornou o único a atingir sucesso de crítica e sendo considerado um dos melhores álbuns do gênero de toda a história.

Aqui para download o debut homônimo Adolescents      Download

1 – I Hate Children