Vou brincar de Xou da Xuxa e dedicar esse post pra Julie, que pediu o tema, pro Marcelo, que me divertiu horrores no casamento do fim de semana, e principalmente pra Renata e pro Alexandre, que casaram numa cerimônia linda (or so I heard) cheia de referências cinematográficas, da qual pretendo bancar o Rubens Edwald Filho numa faixa em áudio do dvd do casório. Mas vamos ao meu top!

5- Gilmore Girls

Então, como a Julie não disse que era pra escolher episódios de séries com casamentos, vou colocar combos e acreditar piamente que não estou roubando. Por exemplo, Gilmore tem o não casamento da Lorelai com o Max, mesmo depois dele mandar mil margaridas pra ela, numa cena tão linda… Teve o casamento de coadjuvantes na pousada da mesma, quando ela tava se acertando com o Chris, mas ele descobre no meio da festa que a ex-namorada estava grávida. Teve o não casamento dela com o Luke, que culminou com uma cena que eu mal conseguia olhar pra TV de tanta pena alheia, onde a Lorelai usa o casamento (viu? mais um!) da Lane pra fazer um discurso sobre como ela nunca iria casar, na frente da cidade inteira. E finalmente teve o casamento dela com o Christopher, em Paris, na finada temporada. Todos muito importantes e decisivos pra trama. E sim, eu sou meio girlie, e assisto Gilmore Girls.

4- How I met your mother

Essa é uma daquelas séries só eu assisto e todo mundo mais vai pular sem ler, né? Mas enfim, o casamento do Marshall com a Lilly (Alyson Hannigan, a Willow de Buffy) é um dos melhores momentos da série. Em primeiro lugar por ser um dos meus casais favoritos na TV atualmente. Eles estavam noivos desde o primeiro episódio da série, e depois de indas e vindas, eles finalmente casam. Quase teve casório em águas internacionais, mas o casamento em questão aconteceu no final da segunda temporada. Marshall estava impagável com as luzes no cabelo, no seu desespero em raspar só no meio, e passar a cerimônia inteira de chapéu (e sensacional que no começo da temporada, em um flash foward, ele já estava de chapéu, mostrando que tudo foi milimetricamente calculado). Além disso, Ted e Robin terminam, e foi realmente emocionante. Eles eram um casal fofo, mas que tinham que terminar para dar continuidade para a série. A cena onde Robin acha que Ted está pedindo em casamento, mas na verdade era o pessoal da outra mesa (fugurantes que realmente ficaram noivos) é bem bacana, e de partir um pouco o coração. Assim como Sex and The City prova que mesmo num episódio que deveria ser sobre a sacralização da relação de duas pessoas, o amor entre amigos é tão forte quanto.

3- Friends

Muita gente não lembra mas Friends começa com um casamento, que não se concretiza, entre Rachel e Barry. Impossível esquecer da Jennifer Aniston vestida de noiva entrando no ap. Tudo começa assim. E desde então, Ross se casa mais duas vezes, uma com Rachel e outra com Emily, Phoebe casa com Mike, e Chandler casa com Mônica. Difícil dizer qual é o melhor. Gosto muito da Mônica com o Chandler, e o episódio com ele freak out, e quase abandona a noiva no altar, que culmina com Rachel grávida, é bem legal. Mas desse casal ainda prefiro o noivado, em que tudo parece perdido, e Mônica que faz o pedido. Emily e Ross já foram citados aqui, eu gosto, mas é o anti-casamento, e eu odeio a Emily. Aquele episódio é totalmente roubado por Chandler e Mônica tentando fazer sexo antes de voltarem. Então acho que o meu favorito fica sendo o do Ross com a Rachel, na capela com os dois bêbados e de cara pintada. Se nâo me engano, tem um outro casamento hilário onde a Rachel canta “Copacabana”, mas nâo é o suficiente pra entrar aqui, mas vale citar…

2- Brothers and Sisters

Como nâo colocar meu casal gay favorito da TV, né? Pelo menos posso dizer que entre aprovarem o casamento gay, e o banirem com a Prop 8, Scott e Kevin se casaram. Tão lindos… Eu sei que o Scott é malinha de vez em quando, mas no geral, acho o casal muito fofo. E foi bem melhor que o casamento da Kitty, que tá se tornando uma personagem bem chatinha. O Justin deve casar essa temporada, mas eu ainda não comecei a assistir, mas ninguém barra o Kevin, o melhor personagem da família, junto com a Sarah. Ficam com a minha prata.

1- Ally McBeal

Ally, em 5 temporadas, tenta casar de qualquer jeito, e tudo teria dado certo se o Robert Downey Jr não tivesse estragado tudo. Mas como isso não aconteceu, dou meu ouro pro que provavelmente é o melhor não casamento da TV. Ally aceita ser dama de honra de uma das suas clientes, e no meio da cerimônia reconhece o noivo (e dá um grito histérico enquanto a noiva sobe ao altar) como um cara com quem ela transou num lava-carro. Obviamente, minha advogada delusional favorita decide interromper a cerimônia numa cena hilária com um grande “nooooooooo” em slow motion. Quando o padre pergunta porque eles não podem se casar, ela sussurra (em seu microfone) que transou com o noivo. A mulher o perdoa mesmo assim, e decide continuar com a cerimonia. Não satisfeita, Ally decide interromper novamente, é vaiada, só pra contar pra noiva que não apenas transou, mas que foi o melhor sexo da vida dela, e que se a noiva não achava que ele era um bom amante, é porque tinha alguma coisa errada. O casamento não prossegue e alguns episódios mais tarde, a noiva processa Ally por ter estragado o casório e pelo sofrimento emocional. Defintivamente, mereceu meu ouro.

Segue o vídeo que eu mesmo ripei correndo pra vocês verem como é hilário:

Angie posted this meme earlier this week, and how could I resist? Compile a list of your top 10 favorite TV couples to share. These are in no particular order.

1. Josh & Donna, The West Wing

2. CJ & Danny, The West Wing

3. Bartlet & Abby, The West Wing

What West Wing fan didn’t feel all warm and fuzzy when Josh and Donna finally became a couple? I love watching the banter, the way they know each other so well, and the way neither lets the other get away with any crap. They can make each other laugh, and they are always there when needed. Josh is brilliant but arrogant, and a good friend; Donna is gullible yet savvy, smart, and can see right through him. A good tv couple, in my opinion, has loads of tension and what-if build-up. And two characters who challenge and complement each other.

And that’s why two more of my favorite couples also come from West Wing. CJ and Danny circle each other more obviously, maybe, than Josh and Donna, but the connection is still complex. And they are still two smart and funny people who get each other.

Then there’s the President and First Lady. Some of the best scenes in the show are when they’re fed up and yelling at each other, because it shows a strong relationship many years in, and with many problems and strains. They push each others buttons, but they, too, know that underneath everything is support and strength.

4. Veronica and Logan, Veronica Mars

This clip says it all, doesn’t it? Epic, volatile, dangerous, yet also vulnerable and sweet.

5. Rory & Jess, Gilmore Girls

Jess might be my favorite tv bad boy. He’s always been my favorite of Rory’s boys. He’s smart and is a reader, so can meet her on an intellectual level, but he challenges her goody-goody nature. And he just always kept coming back. In my mind, at the end of Gilmore Girls, Rory went off with Obama’s campaign, saw Jess during a stop in Philly, and they live happily ever after.

6. Ally McBeal & Larry, Ally McBeal

The favorite TV couple from the college years. Robert Downey, Jr. playing Larry completely won the hearts of me and my roommate. He and Ally are just so adorably crazy, in such compatible ways.

7. Scarecrow & Mrs. King, Scarecrow & Mrs. King

How can you not love an ’80s spy couple?

8. Roger & Joan, Mad Men

They’re funny, they’re challenging to each other, and they always know where the other stands. And who doesn’t love Joan?

Bromances. Sometimes the best couples are friendships rather than romances.

9. Seth & Ryan, The O. C.

I never really watched much of The O. C. because I couldn’t stand the girls. But every once and a while I’d turn it on and would be totally charmed by the friendship between Seth and Ryan. They’re hilarious, and such terrific friends.

10. Stefan & Damon, The Vampire Diaries

They so often make me laugh! I think their banter may be one of the main reasons I have gotten so into this show.

Per farmi perdonare del recente periodo di assenza , vi regalo una delle scene più esilaranti di una serie TV mitica: Ally McBeal.

Il pezzo naturamente è il celeberrimo successo di Barry White che fa da sottofondo al fantastico ballo di John Cage. A voi.

Ok.. I couldn’t do just 5… it was friggin’ impossible!! I couldn’t leave one off without feeling bad…. Though there are 11 I can think of, properly favourite, so one was kicked. Who? I won’t say, cos I still feel bad…

(Literally ALL the eye of the tigers have embedding disabled… so looks like you’ll have to go to yt anyways… evil.. but I supplied the HD one above, so its easy to find lol.

Now, the only one I put in order is Tennant, cos he is my all time favourite, and that will NEVER change. Unless a taller awesome scottish guy comes along. Who’s a more accessable age lol. The rest are in no particular order.

From Tooth and Claw from series 2 of new Who.

1. David Tennant, 6′1″, 38, doesn’t look it… :swoon:

Because the man is pure brilliance. The voice, the body, the hair. Everything about him is AWESOME, but not completely perfect, ya know what I mean… he’s not…. conventionally conventional. There are flaws, but they just add to his character lol. I could listen to that voice saying anything… for hours… he’s just too lovely. And looks awesome in anything. ANYTHING.  Some say he looks elfen, delicate features or whatnot, which could mean I like pretty boys. So untrue. He does fit the pattern of innappropriately aged men lol. Though… he’s the one who started it… I was 15… he was 34. Casanova. All to blame hahahaha. He fits into the ‘tall, dark and handsome’ archetype though. TDH for short.

From High Fidelity, 2000

• John Cusack, 6′3″, 43

Not only is he a brilliant actor, a joy to watch, he’s cute too. Not too cute, but cute. And lovely. And so funny. Serendipity is possibly my favourite Cusack flick. Though High Fidelity comes damn close. Then Grosse Point Blank and Being John Malkovich and Con Air. Theres more… but not now lol. He fits with the older man type. TDH.

My favourite photo of Misha to date. Though its hard to pick lol.

• Misha Collins, 6′0½”(exact same height as me…cutting it close lol), 35

He’s just… he’s yummy. First noticed when portraying Castiel in Supernatural in season 4. Just… so…awesome… so adorable as the ignorant/innocent… character. (Can’t say too much….spoilers n whatnot, my friend might read this.) But I tracked down the majority of his other stuff, and he’s just as yummy. Yummy with slightly naff hair and hick-accents and even russian, thought russian I’m not against lol. Can’t wait to meet him at the convention later this month, 2 weeks away! :woooooooooooooooooo!!!! I get to have a picture with him! Eeeeeeeeeeeee! (I’ve let the fangirl out. If you couldn’t tell. lol.) He fits into TDH too, but with gorgeous blue eyes instead of gorgeous brown. I don’t know quite what I’ll do when I meet him….. eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Currently my favourite photo of Jensen I thinks....

• Jensen Ackles, 6′1″, 31, getting younger slowly lol.

All because of Supernatural. After I gave in and watched Supernatural late last year, I had to make a choice between Jared Padalecki, aka Sam, or Jensen Ackles, aka Dean. As you can see, I went for Dean, sure he’s 3 inches shorter than Sam, but Dean is… Dean…. just….Dean…slightly morally questionable and more bad boy than his younger brother, but not too bad boy, that’d be boring lol. You’d understand if you watched Supernatural and are either a girl or gay lol. Jensen wins over Jared, but the team of the two of them are soooooo cute. He’s of the TDH variety, but with slightly lighter coloured hair lol. He’s a bit younger than the majority of the list too haha. Only 11 years older. He’s engaged to his long term girlfriend Daneel Harris. I’ve only seen her playing total bitches in tv shows or movies, I dunno what she’s like in real life, she’s gotta be nice though, cos Jensen is weirdly shy sometimes apparantly lol. Unless he’s the bitch and she’s the butch LOL. That’d be hilarious if true.

The first image of JJ that made me take notice lol. Also the pic that prompted me to watch Fringe lol.

• Joshua Jackson, 6′2″, 31, CANADIAN!

JJ combines 3 of my favourite things. Tall, Canada and JJ Abrams. He’s in Fringe. Awesome new series from JJ Abrams. I notice lots of J’s in my list lol. More to come too. He fits TDH too. In a slightly pudgy faced way. But he’s awesome in all the stuff I’ve seen him in, in a cute, droll, sarcastic way. I started watching Dawson’s Creek because of this guy! Thats like… the lowest I’ve sunk to watch favourite actors… and I’m becoming strangely addicted… DAMN ME…. damn the fluffiness…. damn JJ being in it….

JDM. The Comedian to most guys out there, Denny to me.

• Jeffrey Dean Morgan,6′2″, 43

Another older guy. This time I’m blaming Grey’s Anatomy. JDM was Denny Duquette. My favourite guy in the show. Grey’s fans will know of him. Most of you lot won’t lol, some will I’m sure, cos Grey’s Anatomy will be a guilty pleasure, like Dean has ‘Dr Sexy MD’ in Supernatura lol. (A clever combo of House MD and McDreamy from Grey’s.) JDM is….pure sex. The voice is gorgeous. And the eyes…. there used to be a fansite called JDMSchool, but it went away… I don’t know why, but all I know is the creators of the site were far too scary, refered to him always as Daddy for his role in Supernatural as John Winchester, Dean+Sam’s daddy. Also, JDM is the sole reason I finally decided to watch Supernatural. Theres a clear path from one actor to another lol. He again, is TDH.

RDJ in an awesome car advert.

• Robert Downey Jr, 44, 5′ 8½”

Shortest of my whole list. First noted while watching Iron Man. Who didn’t? Seriously? The mans hot stuff. Not long after I saw Kiss Kiss Bang Bang by order of one of my friends. But its when I came to uni the fangirling really took off. I bonded with two other girls over RDJ, to begin with lol. We had movie nights, I managed to procure a large amount of his filmography which we watched one by one lol. Charlie Bartletts one of my favourites. He makes up for his lack of height in awesomeness. I watched season 4 of Ally McBeal, got addicted, watched season 5, then started from 1 lol. Got the boxset for christmas. Fits the DH part, but not tall. Tall for some girls I’m sure, but not me lol. I should also mention, RDJ is the reason for the JDM phase, which lead to the Ackles, which lead to Misha. lol. A trail. What did I say?

From Love Actually, a movie I dont actually like lol.

• Colin Firth, 6′ 1½”, 49

I can’t remember why I was watching Love Actually… but I do remember Colin Firth’s pretty face staring at me on the DVD case. So I’m blaming that. He may be a archetype for the posh british kinda guy, but least he’s not like Hugh Grant, bumbly british guy… bah…. Firth is…. yummy. He’s the oldest of my list, unless I start counting the semi-fangirlisms lol. He’s just… I dunno… I saw Pride n Predjudice when I was like 5-6, so it can’t be the Mr Darcy thing… He’s got a lovely voice to boot. I went on a Colin-kick a few months ago, got like 6 movies with him lol. Not all good ones. Last Legion is… bad…. very very naff… but he’s in it… so it makes up for it lol. I think late 30’s, early 40’s is optimum Firth age in movies lol. And yes, he’s very TDH. No blondes yet I hope you notice lol. Not sure why that is…

He's riding a unicorn fercryin' out loud! Worship the man!!!!

• Neil Patrick Harris, 6′1″, 36, didn’t know lol… was still thinking he was 34 lol.

Now, this guy… less mancandy, more pure win. He’s Barney! Barney Stinson is the pinocle of awesome. The pinocle of Legendary. And he’s not bad to look at lol. I prefer Ted though. (Josh Radnor) Both who I saw in How I met your mother. Later night fluffy comedy. Loved it. And Ted’s just so cute. But NPH has to be on this list cos he’s pure win. He’s in Starship Troopers! In Harold and Kumar go to White Castle(or Get the Munchies here in the UK lol)! And, he is Dr Horrible. He’s epic. I refuse to watch Dougie Houser though, would scare me and scar me lol. First blonde of the list lol.

So smexy.

• Nathan Fillion, 6′ 1½”, 38 Same age as Tennant.

Nathan Fillion. Capt Mal. Capt Hammer. And, most recently, Richard ‘Rick’ Castle in Castle lol. He’s tall. He’s Canadian. He’s got brown hair. And he’s got that crooked hot thing going on. Slightly rough around the edges rather, same as RDJ and JDM has I spose lol. Definately TDH. And Canadian! :woop: Not as good as Scottish, but better than Irish lol. First noted in Serenity. Then watched Firefly. I know, shoulda been the other way round, but if I didnt see the movie on ITV4 I probably never would have seen it at all lol. Love that movie.

So… what do these guys say about my taste in men? lol. Well, men over boys definately. 30 is a great age for guys. So’s 40, but when you’re not even 20 (yet, December) its not really feasable lol. I do prefer dark over blonde… but its not exactly important lol.

And do you see any Zac Efron-likes in this list? NO! Thats cos I have decent taste lol. Lowest I’ve sunk is Chad Michael Murray in One Tree Hill. (I didn’t mean to…. :sob:) And my youngest mancandy is Steven Strait. The perfect Jacob. He’s 23 I think. And tall enough. 6′2″ Mmmmm…… and yeah, 23, just IMDB’d him to double check lol.

And, because I just gotta, a few more pics I wanted to use, but didn’t. MANSPAM!!!!!!!!!

Ahhhh the lols.

Cas and Dean. The winningest couple in Supernatural lol. Destiel ftw!!!!

Kinda reminds me of Liev Schreiber in this pic... which aint a bad thing if ya know what I mean. LOL

A pic with Anna Torv from Fringe.

Even with a blue mohawk and eyeliner, you still would. Don't deny it. He wears a kilt in the movie too. It's soooo good lol.

One of my favourite episodes, because he does his real accent, and shivers go up spines.

Even in a bowtie. And I hate bowties.

Dean on the Impala. Doesn’t get much hotter.

End of his epic Eye of the Tiger lip sync. I mean epic. Its so good. And he's so cute when he's smiley like that.

Doesnt happen enough in Supernatural. Dean smiling like that I mean lol.

From a pilot of a series called 'Reinventing the Wheelers', which I really wanna see.

I think lol’s are deserved here. Specially if you watch it over and over….which you shouldn’t lol… I must stop now…. ok now…. NOW!!!

by Beal

In the first grade, local weatherman Kevin Orpurt visited my elementary school. The student body gathered in the gymnasium and sat on the floor (wow, this is even more low rent than I originally remembered) for Kevin’s captivating presentation about weather patterns and storm facts, probably, I can’t actually remember, because I was SO EXTREMELY PUMPED THAT I WAS MEETING A REAL LIVE TELEVISION STAR. Now, keep in mind that I was six and I had no idea what a “local affiliate” was or that MY “local affiliate” was located in Terre Haute, Indiana. What I thought was that Kevin Orpurt was the WORLD’S meteorologist and that me and my school were so special that he traveled all the way from 30 Rock to share his love of climate with us. Eventually, my excitement for meeting Mr. Orpurt turned to shame and a source of family mockery. Sixteen years later, I moved to Los Angeles where celebrity sightings are typical and routine so when I encountered one in the drugstore, the post office or a coffee shop my reaction was more of a “oh cool” than “HOLY SHIT HE’S ON TV!!!” Excitement-wise, nothing can compare to the Kevin Orpurt incident (that’s the saddest thing I’ve ever typed) but here are a few TV STAR ENCOUNTERS that come close. . .

5.  Jasmine Guy — Whitley Gilbert in  A Different World (1987-1993)

You know what’s greater than seeing Jamie Lee Curtis or Meredith Baxter Birney walking into an A.A. meeting? Seeing Jasmine Guy approaching the facility in which the meetings are held at the time in which they are held. See, I used to work four doors down from a church that held celebrity-studded alcoholics [not so] anonymous meetings on Thursday mornings at 9 a.m. The first time I saw Jamie Lee (who once called me “lovey”) I thought, no shit? what’s she doing walking around here at 9 a.m.? Until my boss informed me what all those people that smoked in front of the church were there for. Now Jamie didn’t smoke, and I can’t say that I ever say M.B.B. did either, and that doesn’t really matter, because the point is those two SEEM like they could be alcoholics. BUT WHITLEY GILBERT??? You’ve got to be kidding me. I’ve never been closer to figuratively shitting my pants. I had roughly a solid minute of Jasmine Guy approaching me head on, since I was walking up the street towards my office and she was walking down the street, POSSIBLY towards this meeting. Now, I can’t say for certain, but she had parked up the street (meaning she didn’t live in one of the houses down the street) and the only thing between her and the church was a nail salon, a waxing store (what do you call those?) and a boutique. HOWEVER, none of them opened until 10 a.m.! So, by the powers of deduction, Jasmine Guy may or may not have a drinking problem and I [sort of] witnessed it first hand.

4.  Patricia Wettig — Nancy Krieger Wilson in thirtysomething (1987-1991)/Holly Harper in Brothers & Sisters (2006-present)

Perhaps Patricia Wettig isn’t exactly who you think of when you think “Television Star,” but she made my list because of the frequency in which I ran into her, literally one time RAN INTO her (incidentally on the same day I “ran in” to her co-star, please see #1). From what I gather, Patricia (and her husband Ken Olin) must live in Pacific Palisades, a smalltown-esque celebrity enclave nestled on the bluffs between Malibu and Santa Monica. We share a favorite restaurant, Cafe Vida, because I saw her there at least once per week. It’s a small place, less than 20 tables, so no one could come in without you noticing (which Heidi and Spencer, vomit, did on the daily). I always really wanted to approach Patricia, and tell her I really liked her show, but I could never bring myself to do it, for fear of appearing as if I cared about celebrity (so instead I am blogging about it years later). The last time I saw her was at the CVS on 26th and Santa Monica Blvd. I was visiting L.A. the week before Christmas, stopped at the drugstore for something and as I rounded the corner of one aisle I smacked head on into another person. When I looked up and made eye contact, it was none other than Patricia Wettig. We said, “Excuse me” to one another, all the while making solid eye contact, and for a brief moment I considered sparking up a conversation. However, she seemed to recognize me (no doubt from our regular luncheons) and that was more satisfying to me than mentioning that strangely (and sounding made up) I had just seen her co-star at the mall.

3. Will Smith — Will Smith in The Fresh Prince of Bel Air (1990-1996)

Spotting celebrities in traffic is pretty spectacular. It’s like they think that within the confines of their $100,000 automobile, they are invisible. It’s quite the opposite actually. You see a retardedly expensive/shiny car and, as much as you wish you didn’t, you wonder who is inside. Nine times out of 10, it’s a nobody with a car payment that will bankrupt him before his cheating trophy wife can do it but once in awhile it’s Dennis Quaid or THE FRESH PRINCE OF BEL AIR! Heading into Hollywood one sunny afternoon I noticed a lustrous black Bentley convertible to my right. From a slight distance the driver appeared to be a Laker, but when the light turned red and I rolled up directly next to the vehicle, a perfect place to cock my head and stare, I noticed that it was, in fact, Will Smith. It was Will Smith, sitting in traffic next to me biting his nail. It was Will Smith spitting his finger nail into mid-air in the general direction of my car! The light turned green and, partly horrified, I continued east on Sunset Boulevard. Traffic is thick and another light turned red, aligning Smith and I for yet another couple minutes. I played it cool, nonchalantly looking to my left away from Smith and wouldn’t you know it, there he was again, this time as Hancock on an excessively large billboard. I turned back to my right, as it was exciting having both a picture of his face and his actual face on either side of my vehicle. THIS TIME, Will, a friendly guy, noticed me staring. He gave me a head nod which I returned (desperately wishing that I had “Gettin’ Jiggy With It” in my stereo) before he pulled in front of my car and turned left on Laurel where low-lifes like me, fear to tread.

2.  Ali MacGraw — Lady Ashley Mitchell in Dynasty (1984-1985)

Perhaps Ali MacGraw (no relation to Phil) is better known for her Academy Award nominated performance in Love Story than she is for her role in Dynasty, where she was killed in the Moldavian Massacre, but humor me. Now, admittedly, Ali MacGraw isn’t really on my celebrity radar. In fact, I had no idea who she was until after our chat. I was in a boutique store in L.A. trying on jeans when someone else came in to look around. I heard her tell the manager/my friend that she’d been keeping busy “working for Vogue.” Being that there was no mirror in the dressing room, I was soon forced to exit in order to use the large one located in the middle of the store. I plant myself in front of the mirror, and Ali MacGraw says to me, “Oh my god, those jeans were MADE for your body. You really have to get them.” Now, maybe she was just being nice, or maybe I was having a skinny day, or maybe the jeans were just high-waitsed enough to hide my muffin top BUT I will never be above taking false fashion compliments from a maiden of Vogue. I decide to purchase the jeans and for the next 15 minutes chat with this lady about her new home in Sante Fe, how she doesn’t miss L.A. and how much she loves this one kind of sandal that my foot is too fat for. After her departure, I was told who she was and thank god I didn’t know before or I may have had a Sweet Dee-style dry heave right in front of her or more likely done the ever-rude “My MOM loved that when she was a kid”. I still have the jeans, which I refer to exclusively as “my Lady Ashley Mitchell jeans.”

1.  Calista Flockhart — Ally McBeal in Ally McBeal (1997-2002)/Kitty Walker in Brothers & Sisters (2006-present)

The story I’m about to tell you is true. I almost [accidentally] killed Calista Flockhart. Part of me is glad that this was an “almost” situation and the other part of me wonders what doors would have opened up for me if I had, in fact, killed Ally McBeal or at least maimed her. Last December, L.A. was unseasonably cold, and rainy so instead of shopping outdoors on Melrose or the Promenade, I was relegated to the indoor Westfield Shopping Center in Westwood on Pico. Apparently the same thing happened to Calista. Now, I wasn’t actually living in Los Angeles at the time, only visiting,  and my friend Bic (you know, the girl who likes pens) was kind enough to loan me her apartment and brand new car for the week–the car that nearly killed Calista. As an Angeleno, parking AS CLOSE or CLOSER to the entrance as humanly possible is requisite. I noticed a spot and headed straight towards it at a reasonable speed. From the corner of my left eye I noticed a quick flash of a vehicle’s tail lights, no doubt the result of someone pushing the lock button on their deal. WITHOUT LOOKING FOR CARS, said person steps directly into oncoming traffic (me, in Bic’s car) FORCING me to SLAM on my breaks. This person gets out of harm’s way somehow (I couldn’t see my head was flying forward due to the violent slamming of the breaks) and is now standing directly next to my driver’s side window. I look over and wouldn’t ya know it! It’s Ally McBeal! She makes an “oops” face, smiles and politely waves. I smile awkwardly and wave back–a mutual exchange of “I’m not sure which one of our scatter brains lead to this almost tragic accident.” (Classic Ally). I quickly parked the car and spent the next hour stalking her and her family in Nordstrom.

Have u ever heard this song?

You’re my Honeybunch, Sugarplum
Pumpy-umpy-umpkin, You’re my Sweetie Pie
You’re my Cuppycake, Gumdrop
Snoogums-Boogums, You’re the Apple of my Eye
And I love you so and I want you to know
That I’ll always be right here
And I love to sing sweet songs to you
Because you are so dear

I like this song so much…. It’s was the cutest little song I’ve ever heard.

Actually this chorus from Amy Castle’s version of “You’re My Honeybunch”. Lyrics and music by Judianna and Buddy Castle.

Who is Amy Castle anyway?

Amy Jessica Castle is an American actress that was born on April 2nd, 1990 in Woodland Hills, California. She has appeared in many shows, including Ally McBeal, The Norm Show, Providence, Lizzie McGuire, Oliver Beene, Malcolm in the Middle, and Summerland. In 2002, Amy won a Young Artist Award for “Best Performance In A Comedy Series – Guest Starring Young Actress” for her work on Lizzie McGuire in the episode “Just Like Lizzie”.

Amy Castle recorded this song in 1994 when she was 3 years old. And here is the video, watch it and enjoy it…..

In 1997, I got into Ally McBeal from episode one.  I don’t even know how I found out about it, how I managed to win the TV battle with my sister.  (Only TV battle against her to date?  Party of Five over Dawson’s Creek.  Suck it, Dawson.)  Also, I’m not entirely sure why I liked it.  I was fourteen.  Not exactly the show’s demographic.  (Or the soundtrack’s, which I still have on cassette somewhere.)

But by the second season, I wasn’t as impressed.  The quirky things that would have been fine in moderation (dancing baby?) went full-force somewhere in season two, and by season three, they had lost me all together.  (That didn’t, however, stop me from watching the series finale years later and crying anyway even though I had no idea what had transpired in the intervening years.)

Every once in a while, when I did DVD checks, I never saw Ally McBeal.  There was a best-of type, but not a complete first season.  (Like other good shows, it happened in Europe before it happened here.  Explain?)  And then, and then, a few weeks ago, there it was!  First season and a complete box set of the entire series.  So, since that day, the first season has been sitting on my coffee table, waiting for me to actually have the time to sit on my futon and enjoy it.

Which I did on Saturday.  Oh, my goodness.

It took a minute to switch from Calista Flockhart as Kitty McCallister back to Calista Flockhart as Ally McBeal, but, once I got there.  Excellent.

All of the love came right back.  Even at fourteen, I knew I was a neurotic ball of mess, prone as Ally McBeal to fantasizing about various forms of destruction mid-conversation, a perpetual voiceover narrating my every move.  The other characters that I enjoyed so much were there as well – nebby Elaine, smart-mouthed Renee, Vonda Sheppard singing at the bar, the unisex bathroom, and all the hilarity that appropriately ensues.

And it was in that first episode that new things appeared that would have made sense one way at fourteen that make a totally different level of sense at twenty-six.  In that episode, Ally says, “I feel like the clients look at me like I’m a little girl, and I feel puny.”  A week or so ago, though this happens with some regularity, I was discussing with one of my classmates the problem with being a small woman: you forever see yourself as a little girl and can’t help wondering if people who are younger, but bigger, maybe see you in the same way.  I automatically hand over authority to those larger than I am, even if, at the time, or in retrospect, I know it’s often ridiculous.

I also recently had a conversation with a professor about the realities of being a female in academia, even in 2009.  And so, if Ally McBeal wants to offer me commentary about being a woman in the real world, and the way some things never change, I’ll accept.  I’ll take any guidance I can.  Especially nuggets like this one: “The more lost you are, the more you have to look forward to.”

I look forward to a lot.

And now that this DVD dream has come true, I put in a bid for Boston Public.  Anyone else with me?

Mai tineti minte scena asta? Sau alea in care Ally McBeal tipa “I object!”? Dupa Dallas, serialul asta mi-a marcat copilaria – bine, nu eram chiar asa de mica

Ally McBeal illustration by Gluekit for Entertainment Weekly magazine, 2009.

Is he the one-armed man?

Harrison Fucking Ford.  It’s his middle name, really.  (No, not really.  He has none.  He did go by Harrison J. Ford early in his career as not to be confused with the silent film actor of the same name, but I digress.)

Back in the 70’s, 80’s, 90’s, and, um, just 2000, Ol’ Harry was at the top of his game (for the most part).  Not only did he bring us the above two scoundrels with their hearts of gold (each for three movies, since there is no Crystal Skull, just as there are no prequels), he also brought us:

• a cowboy in a roadster (American Graffiti)
• a cowboy in a temple (The Frisco Kid)
• a detective in a strange land – the future (Blade Runner)
• a detective in a strange land – Amish country (Witness)
• a doctor chasing after terrorists who kidnapped his wife (Frantic)
• a doctor chasing a one-armed man who murdered his wife (The Fugitive)
• a doctor chasing his wife to murder her (What Lies Beneath)
• a lawyer trying to put his life back together (Presumed Innocent)
• a lawyer trying to put his life back together (Regarding Henry)
• a business man with love problems (Working Girl)
• a business man with love problems (Sabrina)
• a cop that shares his home (The Devil’s Own)
• a cop that sells homes (Hollywood Homicide)
• a politician having a problem before a plane crash (Air Force One)
• a politician’s aide having a problem after a plane crash (Random Hearts)
• a father in the jungle (The Mosquito Coast)
• a pilot in the jungle (Six Days Seven Night)
• a soldier during the Vietnam War (Apocalypse Now)
• a soldier during the Cold War (K-19: The Widowmaker)
• Jack Ryan (Patriot Games)
• Jack Ryan (Clear and Present Danger)
• a flop (Firewall)
• a flop (Crossing Over)

Whew.  That was easy.

Anywookiee, there might be a light at the end of the tunnel.  Despite the missteps in the late 90’s (Sabrina, The Devil’s Own, Six Days Seven Night), he had a good run.  What changed, you might ask.  I might say:

Sixty-five-year-old Harrison Ford met Calista Flockhart, 44, in 2002, when she reportedly spilled wine on him at the Golden Globes. The pair immediately started dating and have been together ever since. (via iVillage)

A-ha!  Calista Fucking Flockhart happened!  So if Harrison Ford wants to get back to creating iconic characters, he needs to say sayonara to Ally McBeal. I know they’re engaged and he co-adopted her adopted son, but it’s never too late to get out of it…

Harry - remember how much divorce costs?  $85,000,000 ring any bells? (Notice the date of this article announcing his break from Melissa Mathison.)  Don’t you see what a mistake K-19: The Widowmaker that ridiculous Russian non-accent leaving the beloved screenwriter of E.T. did to your film career?!  Here’s to hoping you lose those diamond earrings and that “television star,” and you’ll return to save the Star Wars series in Episodes 7, 8, and 9!!!1!  You can even have Han Solo die in 8 and skip 9 if you’d like!  Whatever it takes!  Be daring like Indy used to be!

Stop this from ever happening again:

In Ally McBeal, season one, episode 17 (“Theme of Life“), Ally’s therapist, Dr. Tracy Clark asks Ally to think of a theme song – something she can play in her head to make her feel better, when necessary.  In this episode, Dr. Clark says her song is “Tracy” (by The Cuff Links), like her name.

Ally has trouble choosing a theme song, but I think she settles on”Tell Him” (by The Exciters) in the end.

I really related to this episode (not sure if that’s a good thing…!) and have since been trying to come up with the perfect ‘theme song’.  I actually have a playlist on my iTunes called ‘Theme Songs’ which I regularly listen to.  I’m down to a top 5 now I think.  And they are…

What’s Up – 4 Non Blondes

This is a classic for me, and one I always sing at karaoke!

☆★☆

Ain’t Never Been Cool – Lucky Soul

I can just relate to the lyrics of this one – it reminds me of being a kid at school, and I’m disturbed to find that life doesn’t change as you get older!

☆★☆

Perfect – Fairground Attraction

I’m a perfectionist – what more can I say?

☆★☆

Dare – Stan Bush

Classic get-up-and-go song!

☆★☆

Vienna – Billy Joel

This one is probably more of a movie montage song than a theme song. It calms me down though.

☆★☆

So, what do you think?

(1) What should I choose as my personal ‘theme song’?

(2) What would you choose?

Please leave your thoughts and musings (and YouTube links) below!

Oh, and by the way, you’ve gotta love John Cage’s theme song in Ally McBeal…

Vækkeuret ringer onsdag m orgen klokken 8..

Du grynter surt og rammer snooze knappen..

Fem minutter senere ringer det igen, og du rejser dig op i sengen i en zombie-lignende tilstand..

Du kigger på skemaet og indser, at dagen i dag byder på timer fra 8.45 til 15.00..

Med denne realitet i underbevidstheden bestemmer du dig for at lukke øjnene igen og “uheldigvis” sove over dig..

Da du vågner rammer en anden realitet dig i fjæset, da en hverdagsformiddag (og tidlig eftermiddag) er en røvssyg fornøjelse, hvis du ikke har noget som helst at give dig til..

Derfor tænder du for flimmeren for at spilde tiden i et par timer med dødssygt TV, som kan få selv Ole Henriksen til at krumme tæer.

Følgende serier fra formiddag/eftermiddag på dansk TV rammer beskrivelsen: Spildtid

Amy i aktion!

Judging Amy (Amys Ret) (TV2) – Den empatiske dommer Amy sidder og spiller højhellig som høj instans indenfor retsvæsnet.

Kedsommelighedsfaktor: 9 ud af 10 (Jeg dømmer dig til….. ZZzzzZZZzzz…)

Babefaktor: 2 ud af 10 (Amy Brenneman får ikke just mændene til at hyle mod månen, så forhåbentlig for dig, er der en gæsterolle som kan bringe dit pis i kog)

Egen erfaring: Da undertegnede måtte nøjes med DR og TV2 i en måned, havde jeg den uheldige fornøjelse at stifte bekendtskab med dommer Amy og hendes øretæveindbydende moder lidt for mange gange… Jeg kunne jo så også bare have slukket TV’et!

Spildtid: 10 ud af 10 

The doctor is here!

Dr. Quinn – Medicine Woman (Lille Doktor På Prærien) (TV2)

Kedsommelighedsfaktor: 6 ud af 10 (Det hænder da, at der er en form for action i dette “hæsblæsende” Wild West drama. Men det kan da undre, at der aldrig er deciderede skuddueller med dødsfald i det vilde vest)

Babefaktor: 5 ud af 10 (Jane Seymour aka Dr. Quinn får masser af TV-tid og er easy on the eyes på en lidt traditionel måde – tjek hende dog ud i Wedding Crashers -, og det hænder da, at der er gæsteoptrædener af et par ganske labre kvindfolk)

Egen erfaring: I en kort periode i sommerferien var jeg desværre på det stadie, at jeg semi-fulgte med i serien…. Og jeg skammer mig….

Spildtid: 7 ud af 10

Life in an airport

Airport (TV2)

Kedsommelighedsfaktor: 5 ud af 10 (Airport er interessant til tider, men har også øjeblikke, hvor du ville ønske, du stadig lå i sengen og snorkede…)

Babefaktor: 1 ud af 10 (Note to self: Undgå engelske lufthavne, når du søger job)

Egen erfaring: Da jeg var en lille purk, fulgte jeg faktisk Airport i en rum tid, men nu bliver det til meget få afsnit, og det har jeg det sådan set fint med…)

Spildtid: 5 ud af 10

Its the Home Edition

Extreme Makeover – Home Edition (Ekstrem Hjemmeservice) (TV3)

Kedsommelighedsfaktor: 6 ud af 10 (Snøft… Følelsesporno af første klasse…)

Babefaktor: 6 ud af 10 (Et par af værterne scorer rimeligt på baberanglisten)

Egen erfaring: Man skal være en koldhjertet skiderik, hvis man ikke finder et par af historierne rørende, men det betyder dog ikke, at jeg gider at se dette ultra amerikanske koncept!

Spildtid: 6 ud af 10

I want YOU to join the Dr. Phil mania

Dr. Phil (TV3)

Kedsommelighedsfaktor: 7 ud af 10 (Kommer an på gæsterne ligesom i andre talkshows og så selvfølgelig også an på Dr. Phils Words of Wisdom… Men hyppigt er det en gang tårevædet tomatsuppe, hvor man er tæt på at knække sig ud over sofaens kunstlæder)

Babefaktor: 0 ud af 10 (Dr. Phil er ikke just en høj barmfager blondine)

Egen erfaring: Har formodentlig aldrig set et helt afsnit af Phillys show, hvor en wanna-be psykiater spiller Goody Two-Shoes i en time!

Spildtid: 10 ud af 10

Jethro is back!

Navy CIS (3+)

Kedsommelighedsfaktor: 6 ud af 10 (Mark Harmon er vrisne Jethro(!) Gibbs i en discount udgave af CSI! Har holdt ufattelige syv sæsoner, hvilket dog ikke er rekord for en jammerlig serie, da den kvalmefremkaldende 7th Heaven kørte i helt ubegribelige 11 sæsoner!!!)

Babefaktor: 6 ud af 10 (Navy CIS gør sig bemærket ved at bruge okay lækre agenter i deres interne rækker) 

Egen erfaring: Har set et par afsnit i en projektperiode, uden at jeg dog har nydt det på nogen måde!

Spildtid: 8 ud af 10

Rats on water

Water Rats (Canal 9)

Kedsommelighedsfaktor: 5 ud af 10 (Australsk “kult” serie på vandet, der dog ikke kommer op på siden af legendariske serier som McGyver, TJ Hooker og Texas Walker Ranger)

Babefaktor: 4 ud af 10 (Kan ikke huske noget nævneværdigt, men tror da, der var en eller anden form for æstetisk behovstilfredsstillelse)

Egen erfaring: Da jeg var yngre og skippede Handelsskolen en seks dage om måneden, var Water Rats overeksponeret på det daværende TV Danmark, så selvfølgelig måtte man da følge serien sammen med den episke Pacific Blue.

Spildtid: 8 ud af 10

Smart dolphin.dk

Flipper (TV2 Charlie)

Kedsommelighedsfaktor: 10 ud af 10 (Øhhh, en serie om en fisk… Og en ganske elendig remake af den gamle serie fra 60′erne!)

Babefaktor: 2 ud af 10 (Colleen Flynn var ikke just nogen babe, hvilket jeg baserer ud fra googles billedresultater, og future superstar, Jessica Alba, var lige en tand for ung!)

Egen erfaring: Så et par afsnit for lang lang tid siden og zapper aldrig over på Charlie medmindre det er kultserien Allo Allo eller Andy Sipowicz og NYPD Blue!

Spildtid: 10 ud af 10

En tynd omgang sødsuppe

Dawsons Creek (TV2 Zulu)

Kedsommelighedsfaktor: 10 ud af 10 (Puke!)

Babefaktor: 7 ud af 10 (Ikke dårligt på trods af de horrible plots og kummerlige skuespilspræstationer)

Egen erfaring: I dette øjeblik vil jeg hellere have revet rygsøjlen ud af røvhullet end tjekke Dawsons Creek ud på Zulu! Min samlede erfaring løber formodentlig op i mellem 3 og 12 afsnit tilbage i Dawsons Creeks guldalder!

Spildtid: 10 ud af 10

Lawyer at work

Ally (TV2 Zulu)

Kedsommelighedsfaktor: 8 ud af 10

Babefaktor: 7 ud af 10 (Den lesbiske Portia de Rossi og According to Jims Courtney Thorne-Smith giver serien lidt krydderi, men desværre er størstedelen af fokus på den anorexi-ramte Calista Flockhart…)  

Egen erfaring: Ikke lige min kop te, da Calista Flockhart har samme indvirkning på mig, som Moby har på Eminem - Barry Whites cameos er dog et plus!

Spildtid: 8 ud af 10

Feeling heaps better.. although that depends on your defination of better. My tooth is killing me.. no seriously it is.. I cant think and and most importantly I cant eat.. Life without food.. is no life at all. My hotness is being denied food.

I recived this link that you can actually make money from writing blogs or more accurately by having adds on your blog and when people click on it, you can make money so I’m thing of changing over to blogger instead of wordpress and see if it actually works, Im not really sure if anyone reads this but hey what the hell, If you dont try, you will never know. Right?

Woke up late today, didnt have time to be as awesome as I usually am and this bloody tooth ache just kills any intention of looking hot!!! But than again when I’m not hot, I’m still hot. God it feels so liberating talking about myself. Anyways I am not in denial anymore about my feelings for Sami. Yes I’m jealous that hes got someone else, and moving one and I secretly hoped that one day we will get back together again, this is based on the fantasy, where one day I rock up at some place (didnt think that far) looking absolutely awesome that he falls in love with me and we get to live happily ever after and now I realise that this is not going to happen and I should be happy with the memories that I have and wish him all the best with his life and I should move on as well.

I mean seriously the train buddy is this close to proposing.. well he doesnt know it yet but I’m sure he is. Hopefully not today, as I dont really look my best. Anyways I knew it was love the moment I laid my eyes on him.. and he loves me too but hes too scared to approach me as he knows I’m way out of his league. Its hard being so pretty all the time ( correction – most times).

Ling Woo: It’s a problem being beautiful. It’s only the handsome men

that ask us out because they’re the only ones who think they have a chance. And handsome men are dolts. Life is unfair to us. At some point we have to face the certain reality: despite all the good the world seems to offer, true happiness can only be found in one thing – shopping.

 - Ally Mcbeal

Shopping – the second most important thing in life right after – Being Hot!!

Again, I write from the floor. Again, I write in front of Ally McBeal reruns.

Holidays are wonderful.

I also haven’t been smacked in the face with any sporting implements yet, either.

G and I drove down to Melbourne on Friday, and I am well and truly in a spectacularly chilled out holiday mode. Which may not be so great, considering I still do have a lot of work to be doing, but I’m in no way ready to do any of it. The drive down was fun – we turned it into a proper roadtrip, complete with stops at all the major tourist attractions that the Hume Highway has to offer. It was possibly the longest drive from Canberra to Melbourne ever made (excluding my six hour stop in Holbrook when Harriet broke down in 07), especially since I got a little lost with the new roadworks from the Hume into the city. I missed a city turn off that I wasn’t expecting, and we ended up on the road out to Geelong before I turned around and somehow found myself crossing the West Gate Bridge from the other side of the city. The whole thing was a bit of a mess, but in the end I didn’t have to cross four lanes of traffic like I would have had to in the past.

G and I went into the city on Saturday, ostensibly to see Dali, although we didn’t actually get to see it. Having spent large amounts of money in several vintage stores we eventually wandered down to the NGV to discover it was going to be a three hour wait to get into the exhibition. It was the final weekend of the exhibition, so naturally everyone in Melbourne had decided they would go that afternoon. We were both kind of wrecked by this stage, and decided we would go and look at the permanent collection and then come back after dinner to see what the line was like. (I heard the following day on the news that at four o’clock in the morning, the line was from the NGV all the way back to Flinders St station.)

We discovered an awesome installation upstairs in the contemporary gallery – a ladder, made from led lights, from the floor to the ceiling. At the top and at the bottom, there was a mirror, so that when you looked up it was like the ladder went up forever, and when you looked down it was like it disappeared into a bottomless hole. It was really awesome, and just a little bit scary.

After the permanent collection closed, we went for some (very questionable) bowling at Crown. Actually, that’s not fair, G was quite good at bowling. I was extraordinarily bad. After a few beers and some very bad pool, we decided to go and put a couple of dollars into the pokies. We got lucky again, and this time won $80 after putting in six. Not a bad record for the entire two times I have played the pokies in my life – $50, and then $80. Of course, I could never play the pokies without G, as I would probably never win again. She kind of understands how the things work. I just enjoy the flashing buttons and putting in the dollar one at a time.

By the time we got back to the NGV, the line was around to the edge of the building (yeah, not as bad as it got), and we were wrecked, so we just grabbed our bags and went home. It was a real shame we didn’t get to see Dali, but it was a fun day in the city nonetheless. If I lived in Melbourne, I wouldn’t have left it to the last weekend of the exhibition… and seeing as I live in Canberra I blame ANU’s stupid term system for the reason that I could only get there on the final weekend of the show, rather than three weeks ago.

I should go, my car is at the mechanics and requires picking up.

Scarjo in the recording studio; image courtesy of actressarchives.com

Scarlett Johansson wants to be considered a hyphenate. And not by joining her surname to husband Ryan Reynolds’s. She wants you to think of her as both actress and singer.

Now, I’m not sure when hyphenates like “actress-singer” or “singer-model” or “model-actress” became a punchline, but I think it suggests a certain snobbery toward classical training and finely-honed technique, usually acquired from years of stage work. Having just watched another episode of Glee, I wonder if guest-star Kristen Chenoweth and principal Lea Michele, both Broadway babies, lend legitimacy to the hyphenate. You could sub in any number of singing actresses with considerable stage training for more examples — Patti LuPone, Julie Andrews, Rita Moreno, Bernadette Peters, Vicky Lewis, Jane Krakowski, the mother-daughter legacy that is Judy and Liza.

Jane Krakowski as Lola in Damn Yankees; image courtesy of playbill.com

And yet, if actresses like Scarlett Johansson, Juliette Lewis, and Gwyneth Paltrow try to establish a musical career, their efforts are dismissed with a derisive chuckle (okay, admittedly, GOOP made Paltrow more of a punchline than Duets ever could). 

But Johansson is an interesting case, because she seems to want to tap into some of the indie caché that fellow It Girl Zooey Deschanel has cultivated with projects like She & Him, if not at the very least balance it with an attempted career in the imagined, perennially just-emergent film musical revival.

Johansson has made music for some time, having taken music and dancing lessons as a kid. Fans of Lost In Translation, her break-out movie from 2003, were perhaps charmed by her performance of The Pretenders’ “Brass In Pocket” during the scene at the karaoke bar. I know some girls who donned that pink wig for Halloween.

Johansson also leant her vocals to a cover of George Gershwin’s “Summertime” for a charity album in 2006 and performed with proto-shoegaze royalty Jesus and Mary Chain at Coachella back in 2007. Again, anyone who saw Lost In Translation can walk through the big symbiotic moment that results from having the actress sing a song featured in the movie that made her a star. That she is alongside the band that authored such a legendary song in the first place and performing it at such a public, credible venue as Coachella should not be overlooked. 

But Johansson’s first widespread effort to tap into hipster-approved musical ventures was her Tom Waits covers record, Anywhere I Lay My Head. Pointedly, this effort was widely dismissed by its target audience. The critics were not kind, dismissing it as a vanity project, discrediting Johansson’s ability, and crying offense that some starlet would dare cover the songs a musical legend like Tom Waits.

Cover of Anywhere I Lay My Head, released in 2008 on Atco/Rhino; image courtesy of tomwaitsuper.blogspot.com

Now, I don’t consider Waits’s ouvre or anyone else’s to be a sacred text. Songs are malleable. What’s more, covers are really fascinating. When they’re bad, they test what you actually like about the original. When they’re good, they can be transcendent, forcing you to rehear a song you already know and love. The Wire faced this each season when they re-worked Waits’ “Way Down in the Hole” for the opening credits, the original only being heard in season two. Let it be known that I think Steve Earle’s pedantic version for season five that swipes from the theme to Law and Order made me question if this song was actually good. Conversely, The Neville Brothers’ version in season three reminded me that it totally was.

Oh, have you seen The Wire? If you haven’t, you should.

For me, then, it wasn’t so much that Johansson, an actress, dared attempt reworking the songs of the (male) master. I could think of far worse things Johansson could do with her time and resources (get arrested for drugs, get cosmetic surgery, get really skinny, make another movie with Woody Allen).

My big frustration with her Waits covers record, which is where I ended up siding with some of the critics, is that I couldn’t actually hear Johansson. Perhaps putting her vocals so far down in the mix was meant to free her from any tethers to the master’s words. But, to my ears, it kind of sounded more like an attempt for producer David Sitek to upstage her, twiddling knobs and piling on layers of reverb so that her voice lent a “cough medicine/Tinkerbell“ vibe to the proceedings. Sitek’s futuristic, anthemic sensibilities usually do it for me, particularly with the work he’s done with Telepathe, The Yeah Yeah Yeahs, and his own band, TV on the Radio (aka my favorite band, aka the rock band of the 2000s). But here, I was like “oh, this is really his record.” It seems to make all the difference when she sings the song live.

Despite this setback, Johansson continues to make music. Last summer, she covered Jeff Buckley’s “Last Goodbye” for the soundtrack to He’s Just Not That Into You, a movie I did not see because I figured an ensemble rom-com of needy skinny women, aloof men, and Wilson Cruz being underused would make me yell “feminism!” and throw tampons at the screen and that’s why we watch movies at home. I can’t valorize her efforts, because the original is a song that made me so swoony for the beautiful boy singer that I taped a photo of him in my notebook and spent my allowance money on Grace. Johansson’s version, on the other hand, reminded me of Vonda Shepard. Tepid execution of such a powerful song makes me feel like a wet noodle.

But now Johansson has recorded Break Up, an album she did with Pete Yorn (who has not had the effect on me that Buckley has, but he seems nice enough). If you’d like to hear some songs off the album, along with their interview with NPR, check it out here and then thank my friend Kristen for, once again, pointing you (and me) in the right direction.

Cover to Break Up, released in 2009 on Atco/Rhino; image courtesy of forthempire.info

Yorn had Serge Gainsbourg and Brigitte Bardot’s collaborations in mind when composing these songs and casting long-time friend Johansson, who he felt was today’s version of the French bombshell.

The music itself sounds fine, and definitely lines Johansson up more closely with the indie-friendly retro cool Deschanel has found for herself. I still feel like her voice, while more expressive and interesting here, seems a bit flat and projectable. And, of course, there’s something potentially unsettling about Johansson being linked with men like Yorn and Sitek who seem to have a little too clear a vision of what they want to construct instead of fostering a more openly collaborative relationship. One could easily extend this reading into a comparison of patriarchal impulses surrounding production between musicians and movie directors. 

So while I don’t want to suggest that Johansson isn’t singing for herself, I also hope she keeps striving to find her own voice.

I thought I’d get you up to speed with what shows I’m watching right now – maybe someone wants to talk about one of these shows, or recommend others?

I’m in happy TV-land right now and might be overdoing it a little. But then again, when there’s good stuff, you have to take advantage of it, don’t you?

• Finished Season 2 of True Blood. No surprise there, I guess. But I’m thinking about actually trying the books again because the ending of this season and what Alan Ball said about the next left me on tenterhooks and I don’t know if I can wait for Season 3. [SPOILER] Thank Goodness that Maryann is finally gone. What’s up with Annoying!Tara? And please, let Jessica and Hoyt work things out, I really liked them together! [/SPOILER]
• Started to watch Sanctuary and finished the first season. While I thought most of the stuff was pretty unimaginative and a little stuck on clichés, I somehow still got hooked. So it won’t be my most favourite show ever, but I guess I’ll still continue watching. Though I have to admit that their constant use of the word “abnormal” bugs me to hell. [SPOILER] Does anybody else think that even non-vampire Tesla has more teeth in his mouth than any person should have? What’s with Brainwashed!Ashley? And can somebody please exchange Amanda Tapping with an actress who can actually act? [/SPOILER]
• Picked up watching My Name Is Earl again. I don’t remember why, but I stopped watching in the middle of Season 3, probably for no good reason. I now finished this season and will start Season 4 as soon as I have a disc drive that actually works.
• I finished Season 1 of the Sarah Jane Adventures (in the absence of all things Doctor and Torchwood) and it is actually quite amusing, even if really for kids. I’m now getting into Season Two and waiting for a Doctor cameo.
• I rewatched Ally McBeal and remembered why I never finished it. Season 1 is very good. Season 2 is fine. Season 3 starts to drag a bit. Season 4 is good again. And Season 5 sucks great big ass.
• I finished the fifth season of The Closer. [SPOILER] Watching the fights between Brenda and Captain Raydor was pure joy. Huge props to both, Kyra Sedgwick and Mary McDonnell. [/SPOILER]
• Leverage is pretty cool. But what’s with this break right now? Why doesn’t it go on? [SPOILER] And I’m afraid what will happen if Sophie really doesn’t come back. She is one of the best things about this show. [/SPOILER]
• The start of the second season of Fringe is already awesome. I’m really looking foward to what happens next. [SPOILER] Butbutbut WHY DID IT HAVE TO BE CHARLIE??? And will there be another Spock cameo? [/SPOILER]
• Watched the pilot for Eastwick. I am not convinced. [SPOILER] Couldn’t they have found an actually attractive Devil? [/SPOILER]
• Community on the other hand, had me laughing right away. That one’s a keeper. [As far as I can say that after two episodes.]
• I watched the first season of Nurse Jackie and it is pretty awesome. I love Jackie and I’m really looking forward to Season 2. Although it does give me weird Twilight-crossover reactions. [SPOILERS] Peter Facinelli, in Twilight Carlisle the Doctor, in Nurse Jackie Fitch the Doctor, has a nervous tick where he grabs women’s breasts when he gets nervous. Everytime he does that in the show, I’m tempted to say, “CARLISLE! YOU’RE A MORMON VAMPIRE WHO PROBABLY NEVER EVEN TOUCHES HIS WIFE’S BREASTS, LET ALONE THOSE OF ALMOST COMPLETE STRANGE NURSES AND DOCTORS!” And then I remember what I’m watching… [/SPOILERS]
• Watched the pilot of FlashForward and so far, they’ve got me. I mean, how could I not like a show that has Shakespeare, Sulu, Merry and Captain Norrington? And Alex Kingston is always a plus. And the mystery intrigues me. Of course, there are some faults with the pilot and this is only a preliminary report, but…
• Glee is kind of a serialised High School Musical. It’s sweet and the music is really good. But if they won’t stop focussing solely on the white able-bodied people and keep the sassy black girl and the shy Asian girl and the boy in the wheelchair the stereotypes and the “look at us, we’re so politically correct” casts they are now, I won’t be watching it much longer.
• I’m a little behind on Numb3rs, but I plan to rectify that. And then I can watch the new season.
• Season 2 of Dollhouse started with quite a bang… [SPOILERS] So, Echo/Caroline remembers already? And Dr. Saunderson character development is pretty amazing. And I loved that we got a closer look at Topher. And also the scence with De Witt and Victor. [/SPOILERS]
• The same old awesomeness in the new season: Castle, The Big Bang Theory, How I Met Your Mother, Eureka.
• Season Premiers I’m still awaiting: Lie to Me (tonight, yay!), 30 Rock.
• New shows I’m gonna try: V, Three Rivers (Alex O’Loughlin is all I’m going to say to that).

Una povera avvocatessa desiderosa solo di concentrazione è tormentata ogni giorno da telefonate di persone sempre diverse che chiedono di un certo McBeal