With Christmas just around the corner, many consumers are scrambling to find the perfect, not to mention the cheapest, gift they can. Wal-Mart, Target, and many other discount retailers are surging, which is certainly good for the giver, but in some cases, not so good for the receiver. Taking a different, albeit selfish approach to gifting this year; the Unemployment Line is thinking long term. Since the gifts you will be receiving will presumably fall short, justify a big purchase with an investment. Presenting the top four gifts you should get for yourself this holiday season.

The Nook from Barnes&Noble

1. If you haven’t already, go ahead and do it. Buy the e-reader you’ve been looking at for the past few months; there are several to choose from that will keep you occupied and entertained during your commute. While the Amazon Kindle and Sony Reader have established some dominance in the market, Barnes&Noble has introduced the Nook just in time to stuff in your stocking. A nice feature that the Nook offers, which others do not, is the ability to loan books to friends – just as you would with a paperback.

2. Tired of twisting your neck to watch the Manning-Wayne touchdown? Welcome the new decade with a flat-screen TV. An instant upgrade to any tube, a flat screen will not only enhance your viewing experience, it will dramatically enhance your living space. From Sony, Vizio, Samsung and Panasonic, incredible deals are being made on sleek and modern flat-screens for the holiday season.

3. Many in the industry know the importance of a good suit, but few take the steps to invest in one. If you have a big pitch, big meeting, or that big interview; a tailored suit will provide an instant shot of confidence, and instant respect from across the table. Invest in one versatile suit – one you can wear to weddings, work and even The Globe on a Friday night. Retailers such as Armani, Versace and Tom Ford continue to make the best suits available, while budget-stricken shoppers can opt for a suit from Topman or Club Monaco without skimping on style or quality. A quarter inch on the cuffs, a slight break in the leg and you can’t go wrong.

A classic Patek Philippe

4. Finally, an investment that will truly stand the test of time; a watch. Try to avoid the Ari Gold Special and opt for a more traditional and simple timepiece that screams sophistication. A classic watch will always be in style, but if you’re buying vintage –be on the lookout for two brands: Patek Philippe and Rolex. If you’re seeking a modern take on the classics, brands such as Audemars Piguet, IWC and TAG Heuer produce some of the finest watches in the world at more reasonable prices.

There you have it – the top four gifts that you should consider getting for yourself this holiday season. I know what you’re thinking, “Times are tough; should I really buy myself something so grand?” Trust me, I know your concerns – and don’t do it if you aren’t comfortable with it. But if you’re planning on buying a bigger gift this year, make it one that will last.

The party is a quiet one. It should have been a great night- Ari’s army had made their way from Chavez Ravine to the coast with no casualties at all, unless you counted a little indigestion and light vomiting. They’d plundered and looted a swath as wide as a football field across the remains of the city, and now here they were at the end of a hard day’s work, in Santa Monica, ensconced in the safehouse of the late beachfront luxury hotel, Shutters.

The boss had made a perfunctory toast – thanking everyone for their hard work – but no one was really buying it. He wasn’t smiling, and everyone knew what it meant when the boss didn’t smile at all, which was the same thing it meant when the boss smiled too much- which was that heads were going to roll, and soon.

Mr. Gold disappeared immediately afterward, bound for a sound- and light-proof suite on a floor so secure that 99 percent of the guests at the party would be shot dead before they were allowed to set foot on it. So the party isn’t very good, because everyone is just standing around looking at everyone else, trying to figure out who’s going to be dead before seven tomorrow morning. Some people are trying- there was a run down to the beach, and a few people even went in the water, laughing off the risk of certain, fast, extremely painful death that comes when you feel a forty-foot tentacle tightening around your ankle.

No one sees one of Things in the water on this night; no one sees anything much unusual- least of all the spirit, or avatar, or whatever of Vincent Chase floating in the dark outside the big hotel windows and looking in at Ari Gold holding a glass of fine red wine. Not only do they not see Vince, they don’t see Ari either because Ari has retired a good three hours earlier. Ari is 16 floors up, mired in combination of a meditative state, sleep, and a stupor induced by three of the industrial-grade Sequonel tranquilizers he carries at all times, in a little zippered compartment on the inside of his left boot.

The party actually looks pretty good to Vince, floating outside the window. No one seems to be having much fun, sure, and it’s a total sausage fest. But Vince’s standards are not what they once were. He sees these professional mercenaries- sipping wine and cocktails, and talking quietly in pairs and small groups about who pillaged what and the things and people they shot- and he experiences an overpowering urge to be with them, just for ten minutes, cracking jokes and holding court again, having three or hour drinks and then, when his new friends have been brought effortlessly into his orbit, heading out to look for some weed, or some girls – anything – just keep the night going and see what happens.

The urge is so strong, there are so many memories coming back now all at once that Vince wants to cry, or scream that it’s all a mistake, it has to be a mistake it wasn’t supposed to turn out like this- but there’s no time because he’s flying now, away from the hotel and the lights of the restaurant perched on the end of this ruined city: The last light in the world- and it shrinks smaller and smaller behind him until it’s a tiny yellow-white dot swallowed by the endless night, and Vince feels himself being torn away from everything that he ever loved, or wanted in his life, and now there is no light at all and nothing below him but the bottomless black ocean, and now he is falling.

Colman Domingo does the dance of the flaming pastry with De'Adre Aziza, Soara-Joy Ross and Eisa Davis. (Photos copyright 20009, Steven P. Marsh)

Actor Colman Domingo’s birthday is Nov. 28. He celebrated at home with some close friends.

Colman channeling Maya Angelou.

Two nights later, on Nov. 30, he turned Joe’s Pub into a reasonable facsimile of his living room two nights later when he threw Colman Domingo’s BIG ASS 40th Birthday Party for his friends, family and fans. It was an evening of irresistible fun.

The stage was filled with singing and stories from Colman’s varied acting career, some from Passing Strange (De’Adre Aziza, Eisa Davis and musical director Jon Spurney) and others, including Ari Gold, Marva Hicks, Soara-Joy Ross and director Charles Randolph Wright, from other acting ventures.

Colman, who is one of the sweetest and most genuinely real actors I know, was touched by the audience’s enthusiasm. And he was thrilled to donate the evening’s proceeds to the Save the Children charity.

If you missed it, nothing I can write here could really recreate the moment, so just sit back and enjoy lots more photos after the jump.

Colman, De'Adre, Eisa, Ari, Marva and Neil Totton join voices.

Colman sharing the love.

How does De'Adre sing like that?

Eisa Davis at the piano.

Marva Hicks blew the crowd away.

Ari Gold serenading Colman.

Colman needs a moment!

Vince and Mary stand in the living of the abandoned, unfinished house. Vince is dazed and confused, dead on his feet.

“We need to get you into bed,” Mary tells him, and no argument is forthcoming from Vince. She takes him up the stairs into the master bedroom- somehow there is furniture here after all- and she puts him into the big canopy bed. Vince experiences neither shame or arousal as Mary strips off his clothes- only a distant, fuzzy gratitude and a longing for sleep.

“I’ll be back,” she whispers, and then she kisses him on the forehead and turns out the light.

Down in the kitchen, Mary fires up the portable gasoline generator she’s brought in, and she has the water boiling in five minutes flat. She uses two teabags, a little sugar, and a few special ingredients all her own.

Mary’s voice calls Vince back out of a deep sleep. She sits on the bedside and she gives him the tea. “Careful, it’s hot.” Vince sits up, leaning back on a big pillow, and he takes the first experimental sip. It’s good.

Before Vince has even finished the tea, he starts to feel himself floating upward, like the ghost of a dead husband he played once in a television movie. He sees the stars through the open roof and they seem to be falling on him, but no- Vince is rising, flying and he’s not afraid now- it’s amazing actually:

He flies out of the house and looks down on the entire abandoned subdivision, the roads and cul-de-sacs from above like runes carved onto the desert by a people now as ancient and inscrutable as any in the Social Studies classes Vince missed anyway because he was making out in the janitor’s closet. Vince flies higher now, far above the desert and west, back towards the ruined city. Through the permanent layer of pollution and soot Vince can somehow see it all: the studio lots, the hills where he once lived, the streets and clubs of Hollywood where he had been a Boy-King- there are almost tears in his eyes now but there’s no time because he keeps flying west, over the luxury fortresses of his former agents and lawyers.

The coast is coming up fast now, Malibu off to the north-west and directly below, the Palisades and Santa Monica, lit by the last red ray of the huge sun as it sinks into the western ocean. Vince circles lower now- he’s not really in control of his flight, but he has no fear either- wherever he’s being taken, he’s pretty sure it will be OK and if it’s not, well… Vince is willing to take his chances at this point.

He makes slow circles over the Santa Monica pier, skirting the blackened hulk of the Ferris wheel, and then lower, below the roofline of the luxury hotels he flies south towards Pico, over the Beachfront Walk where the deathracers speed by, day and night, and then Vince is over Shutters and floodlights beam into the sky around him because, unbelievably, there is a party going on at One Pico.

Somehow Vince knows to fly lower now, and he descends with perfect control until his feet are only eight inches off the path- behind him a three-wheeled death race bike rams its two-foot-long spiked blades through the inadequate armor plating of a hapless opponent and metal screams and blood flies through the air but Vince takes no notice at all – because he is looking the other way, into the big floor-to-ceiling glass windows of the restaurant, and not six feet away, staring out at the waves and holding a glass of red wine, is his former agent and friend, the Warlord Ari Gold.

Happy Anniversary! I am really excited and honored to be celebrating my one year anniversary! “Adaumbelle’s Quest” is a dream come true for me. I would like to take this opportunity to send a big, huge “THANK YOU” to  everyone that has given their time to “Adaumbelle’s Quest” over this past year…from my participants to the press agents who helped get some of my participants to my dedicated and wonderful fans to those who helped get “Adaumbelle’s Quest off the ground which I could not have done on my own. I have thoroughly enjoyed this first year of “Adaumbelle’s Quest” and look forward to the coming year.

To celebrate, I thought it would be fun to interview myself for this special day and let my fans and participants learn a little bit more about me.

1. Who inspired you to become a performer/blogger? Every actor, artist, and performer I’ve ever been a fan of, plus every participant of “Adaumbelle’s Quest” (after all if they didn’t inspire me, I probably wouldn’t have interviewed them). Ever since I was a kid, I always wanted to entertain people. I never really knew how I would do that, I just thought it would happen, but eventually I learned. I always enjoyed making people laugh with my stories and parody lyrics. The comedians that inspired my style of comedy were Ellen DeGeneres, Sandra Bernhard, and fellow “Adaumbelle’s Quest” participant Wendy Liebman. It wasn’t until an open mic night while volunteering with AIDS Action in Boston in 1999 that I thought about pursuing comedy as a potential career. That night was magical with all of us volunteers performing, including fellow “Adaumbelle’s Quest” participant CeyJay Jumo-as. After 7 years of trying to make it as a comedian, I took what I thought was going to be a hiatus, but instead turned out to be a retirement. During that time I sure did miss entertaining people on-stage and thought very hard about what my next move would be. It wasn’t until I attended fellow “Adaumbelle’s Quest” participant Gavin Creel’s concert at The Zipper Factory and heard him sing “The Upperhand,” that I knew something was going to come my way. The song is all about letting “The Upperhand” guide you and that is just what I did. You see, as a theatre lover, I would read all the interviews on Playbill.com, Theatermania.com, and Broadway.com and thought to myself, I would love to interview the artists and performers I admire and ask them what I consider to be the everyday burning questions. One day at work, I was sitting in the lunch room with some of my coworkers and we were talking and I was telling them my thoughts and next thing I knew we were rattling off questions and potential titles to call my blog. I immediately thought of “Adaumbelle” because of the history behind the name (which you can read by clicking on the “Adaumbelle’s Origin” tab) and “Quest” came out of the fact that I’m on a quest to get answers to my burning questions.  With the help of a lot of people, I started researching blog sites and decided to settle here at WordPress.com. With the popularity of Myspace and Facebook, I started “friending” the artists and performers I wanted to participate, sent them e-mails asking to them be part of “Adaumbelle’s Quest” and next thing I knew, I started getting responses and “Adaumbelle’s Quest” was born into reality.

2. Who is the one person you haven’t interviewed that you would like to? That’s not fair to make me single out just one person I still want to interview, so I will list a few…Dolly Parton, Liza Minnelli, Cyndi Lauper, Joan Rivers, Cheyenne Jackson, Lynda Carter, Cher, Chelsea Handler, RuPaul, John Tartaglia, Tyler Maynard, Kathy Griffin, Stephanie J. Block, Betty White, and so, so, so, so many others that I could spend all day listing names.

3. Who do you consider to be your hero? My parents and grandparents.

4. If you could dream about anyone while you sleep, who would it be? My grandparents, so I can spend more time with them and update them on what’s been happening since they’ve been gone.

5. Starbucks or Dunkin’ Donuts? What do you order? Vanilla Chai Latte with Skim Milk. Most of the time it’s Starbuck’s, but if I could go to an independent coffee shop I would. Oh how I do miss The Factory (they used to be in the West Village in NYC), not only did they make the BEST vanilla chai latte, it was just a great place to hang out.

6. Favorite way to stay in shape? By watching what I eat, and by watching I mean watching it go from my plate to my mouth. When that doesn’t work, I enjoy going for a walk to get a vanilla chai latte and lifting the cup to and from my mouth for that extra bit of exercise.

7. Boxers or Briefs? Briefs because they accentuate the positive.

8. Favorite website? Besides, “Adaumbelle’s Quest,”  Olivia Newton-John.com,  Dollymania.net, Amazon.com, and Facebook.

9. Favorite TV Show Theme Song? “Wonder Woman,” “Patty Duke,” “Mr. Ed,” “Punky Brewster,” “Jem and the Holograms,” “Beauty and The Beast,” “Family Ties,” “Silver Spoons,” “Sister Kate,” “Diff’rent Strokes,” “The Facts of Life,” “Saved By The Bell,” “California Dreams,” and “Sordid Lives: The Series.”

10. Superman or Wonder Woman? Wonder Woman

BONUS QUESTIONS:

11. Best holiday gift ever? My signed and framed picture of me and Olivia Newton-John swimming with dolphins.

12. Favorite play/musical? To pick one is very, very difficult, but I will say the one musical that really changed me was “Tommy” because it was a show I had no desire whatsoever to see and afterwards I left the theatre singing and dancing. That experience is what I consider to be “The Power of Broadway.”

Entourage & the Modern Jewish Experience

We recently had a showing of the popular TV show “Entourage” in our community (to ages 16 and up). Entourage is a story of an up and coming movie star living life in Hollywood with all the glitz, glamour and struggle. To many, what makes the show such a hit is the character of the movie star’s Jewish agent Ari Gold: a hard lined, extremely aggressive and no holds barred agent who stops at nothing to be number one in his business, often jeopardizing other priorities in his life.

Ari Gold is not only Jewish but proud of it. He unabashedly makes reference to his Jewishness and his being part of the Jewish people, even happily telling his clients that today is Yom Kippur, the holiest day of the year – so they order another round of drinks to celebrate. In fact there is an entire episode about Yom Kippur, where Ari’s wife makes sure he is without his cell phone during services so he won’t be doing any business. Even so, there is a big movie deal that needs to happen, so he secretly keeps his phone in his pocket to make the phone calls to secure the deal. When his wife finds him being outside of the services, understanding in shame of his incessant need to work and to be on his cell phone, even on the holiest day of the year, she sends out their daughter to find him. The daughter finds him talking in secret outside of Temple on his cell phone with his colleague. Ari comforts his daughter by telling her, “That is the beauty of Yom Kippur honey. As long as you apologize by sundown, it doesn’t matter what you do”.

But there is pride in Ari’s Jewishness. He invites his clients and associates to his daughter’s Bat Mitzvah, invites people over for brisket after Yom Kippur, and consistently makes proud, unabashed and confident one-liners about being Jewish, even saying once about himself, “It’s all going to be fine, the Jew has arrived.”

There are two things that make Ari’s character all the more intriguing. One is that he is based on a real person, a Hollywood agent Ari Emanuel (Rahm Emanuel’s brother, Obama’s Chief of Staff) and the other is that a significant percentage of Jewish people today would probably meet Ari’s experience of being Jewish. That experience being on the one hand of being proud to be Jewish: proud of Jewish customs, traditions, foods, culture and people hood. Proud of our history, of our story and of our ability to seemingly overcome all of history’s obstacles that have come in our way – we are strong and we are proud.

This means that although this is merely a TV show and possibly exaggerated at times, it is more of a reality show that tries to portray the life of a living and breathing Jewish person today. What it portrays is a person who yes, is proud to be Jewish. But more so, portrays a person who although deeply identifies with being Jewish, is quite far from what Judaism is supposed to be for a human being.

In a marital therapy meeting, here is the following exchange.

“Mrs. Ari (doesn’t want Ari to pick up his phone during couples therapy): I ask for one hour of a day for his undivided attention, and I can’t even have that.

Ari: You could have it if you want to live in Agoura Hills, and go to group therapy. But if you want a Beverly Hills mansion and you want a country club membership, and you want 9 weeks a year in a Tuscan villa, than I’m gonna need to take a call when it comes in at noon on a Wednesday.”

Money driven, insulting, one up-manship, angry, afraid and most of all isolated from his family and his wife is the painting of this caricature. There may be Jewish pride, but this is not living the power of Jewish life, and why I feel so many Jewish people today feel estranged from Judaism and look elsewhere for meaning.

What it all comes down to though, is that I do not see joy in the life of Ari Gold. Not in him, not in his colleagues and not in his clients. There is lots of money, lots of fame and recognition, lots of mansions and fancy sport cars – but no joy. True this is not reality and only a TV show, but this show is entirely based on reality and on real people; and I would like to offer a perspective of Torah on how to live a life in Hollywood and anywhere in the world with joy, meaning, trust and be able to spend time with family as well.

“The days of Chanuka are days of gratitude, as it says in the Siddur, ‘and they established these 8 days of Chanuka to appreciate and praise God’. And gratitude is the experience of heavenly enjoyment and pleasure…for in the end of days, there will be nothing but gratitude”

– Rebbe Nachman of Breslev, Likutey Mohoran, 2:2.

When a person lives every minute with gratitude for everything they have, they live a life of enjoyment and pleasure. Because if I am grateful and appreciate all that I have been given, not paying so much attention or focusing on all that I don’t have and that which is wrong, then everything I have is enjoyed. To appreciate is to enjoy and to be grateful is to be alive. This is so deeply essential in Judaism that we are called, “Yehudim” Jews, which come from the Hebrew word, “modeh” meaning to be grateful, for that is the essence of Judaism.

Ari Gold works hard to bless his family with all the blessings of this world: a Beverly Hills mansion, country club membership and a villa in Tuscany – but all that his wife wants is an hour with him. An hour to appreciate eachother, to talk, to relate, to appreciate what they have instead of running around maintaining what they have. But Ari can’t see it. If Ari were to go out of his way to spend that hour (or two or three or four) with his wife, to focus, to talk, to relate and ultimately to appreciate the life he has with her – not only would she be happy, but he would as well.

It is also an illusion to think that he can’t give up his time, either on a Wednesday afternoon or Yom Kippur in order to live the life that he wants. Because there is another essential element, more fundamental, critical and even urgent than anything else in Judaism – and that is to experience and know God.

“From Rosh Hashana to Yom Kippur it is decided in heaven how much money a person will earn for the upcoming year. This amount is added to, to the extent one invests in Torah and Charity.”

– Talmud, Rosh Hashana

“A person has to know 3 things: That everything that happens to him/her is from God; that everything that happens to him/her is for the best; and that everything that happens to a person is a direct communication from God, a communication of how God is trying to bring the person close to them”

– Rav Shalom Arush, Garden of Emunah

When a person lives with the reality that his money is from God, there are no worries in the world. When a person lives with the reality that everything is for the best and a direct gift from God who is trying to communicate with us – what need is there to worry? Obviously there is a need to work, but to overwork is unnecessary. To the extent that in Judaism we all have to take one day off every week to totally relax, be at home and reconnect with our lives and ourselves. Because ultimately it’s all beyond our control, but is in the control of the One who gave us life.

If Ari Gold took an hour off his day to spend quality time with his wife, it would change his life. If Ari would take off Shabbos to reconnect with his family to be at home to reconnect, that would change his life. If Ari spent a little time everyday studying what Judaism is really about, what our power and strength really are, studying books that open our mind and hearts to a greater reality, to settle our mind, to awaken our soul and to learn how to live a life of gratitude (literally Jewish) – even for 10 minutes a day, he would be a different person. A more settled person, a happier person, a richer person, a more confident person, less stress and more chilled person; Ultimately a more Jewish person.

In the end though, I have a soft spot for Ari. Despite his rough exterior and demeanor, he has a good inside filled with a desire to give to his family, make things work for his clients and ultimately is someone you enjoy seeing in action.

So thank you to Ari Gold, Ari Emanuel and everyone at Entourage for giving us all the opportunity to think and rethink what it means to be a Jew in today’s world.

Wishing a happy Chanuka to the entire Jewish world. Everyone should be proud of their Jewishness and enjoy it, and God willing enlighten us all to become truly appreciative, generous and happy people.

Ari Sherbill

(Article appeared in the Shalom Magazine of the Atlantic Jewish Consul)

Entourage Star Jeremy Piven as Ari Gold making a statement to his wife and marriage counsellor. Pretty good speech.

 Where The Music Takes You Maxi-Single by Ari Gold

2009 (9 tracks, 1:05:09)

pop

She has not yet developed a dangerous addiction to sushi.

Name: Amari

Major: Sociology

What I would’ve majored in 4 years ago had I known the economy was going to hell: Engineering… with a minor in “How to find social value in an i-banking job so you can make some mo-nay”

Why I decided to waste $160K $200K on an Ivy League education: Because I didn’t… My grants and scholarships did. ZING!

Current City of Residence: Yonkers, NY

Ideal City of Residence: Manhattan, NY… with the weather of Los Angeles, LA

Current job: Counter worker at Balthazar Bakery in SoHo.

Dream job: Ari Gold, minus the insensitivity and propensity to exercise his healthy lungs. And his love-fake-hate relationship with Asians and the gay community.

Resume claim to fame: Working amongst the publicists of too many Oscar winning actors and popular culture icons to count.

Greatest achievement I don’t like to talk about on interviews: I won $50,000 on an academic Apprentice-style reality show (it was much nicer, don’t worry) when I was 17.

Down on the highlights but everything else looks great!

No, he really didn’t say that, but he definitely hinted at the subject title.  The Seattle PI gives us the lowdown

First Jeremy Piven blamed sushi for mercury poisoning, and now the actor claims he grew man boobs (aka moobs) from drinking excessive amounts of soy milk.

Jeremy Piven leaves Broadway show on doctor’s orders

“I was the guy that dabbled in soy milk, but now I’ve found out soy milk has enough estrogen for me to grow breasts,” Piven told Scottish STV. “I had to put the soy milk down. It was a very confusing time.”

Consumer and nutritional sciences expert Jill Hamilton-Reeves told AOL that she learned the 44-year-old Entourage actor was drinking 12 cups (about three-quarters of a gallon) of soy milk a day. “That means he was taking in approximately 360 milligrams of isoflavones a day,” Hamilton-Reeves said. “And isoflavones are what people generally believe to be responsible for any effects in male reproductive hormones.”

Perhaps someone needs a lesson in moderation.

See Jason…this is why we wonder about you and it’s the reason that Ronin was worried about your health.  Stay off the soy milk…..

Ari Gold.

LEGEND.

Something which I suggest to good students of intuition is to always remain open to a thought or action which impresses you – but for which a good reason to do something about it doesn’t seem apparent. So this morning as I watched an inspiring conversation with Neil Peart of the band Rush by Ari Gold of Adventures of Power, I was compelled to take my own advice.

Like all things worthwhile, you’ll need to watch the full interview at Drum Channel for best results. The short clip from it, shown above, doesn’t do Gold or Peart justice. But there’s something about watching this clip which one or many of us are going to find seminal. I’ve not a clear idea or vision of what it is in this moment. Time will tell. One doesn’t always have to do a reading, but simply trust that what’s going on will work out for the highest good of all.

Tip your glass to the adventure, and whoever this is for, please let me know when the lightning of inspiration strikes. We’ll have some fun ‘remembering’ what we pretended to ‘forget.’

Because of Neal Peart’s brilliant lyrics, I was first attracted to Rush’ music many years ago.

Una frase que me gusta es esa que dice que los años empiezan en Septiembre. La verdad es que quien lo dijo tenía toda la razón; en Septiembre empieza todo, el curso escolar, el curso político, los fascículos, las series de la tele… Ahora que ya llevamos unas cuantas semanas dentro de lo que es el curso televisivo me parecía adecuado hacer un pequeño resumen de las que van a ser mis asignaturas fijas este año 2009-2010. Iba a poner estrellas para valorarlas, y luego me he dado cuenta de que a todas les iba a poner la máxima puntuación…

HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER

Empiezo con una serie que es fija para mi, HIMYM ya va por la quinta temporada y se consolida en mi parrilla semanal como los veinte minutos en los que más me río del día. Sitcom de risas enlatadas con ínfulas de Friends (aunque con alcohol duro en vez de café), HIMYM no hace temblar a los seis vecinos más famosos de Nueva York pero les homenajea muy dignamente. La verdad es que me da igual que lleven cinco años explicando como conoció a la madre y que a estas alturas el planteamiento original esté más perdido que Andy&Lucas en una biblioteca; mientras Barney Stinson (Neil Patrick Harris) siga haciendo de las suyas yo seguiré siendo fan de esta serie.

ENTOURAGE

Traducida en España como “El Séquito”, esta serie cuenta las aventuras de un chico de Brooklyn ascendido a actor de la flor y nata de Hollywood. Cuando vi el primer capítulo me aburrió y la dejé abandonada en un rincón de mi disco duro, pero este verano me quedé sin cosas que ver y, en vez de estudiar para mis siete exámenes de Septiembre, me dediqué durante dos semanas a verme seis temporadas del tirón con lo que los suspensos estaban asegurados (luego no fue así). La joya de esta serie es Jeremy Piven, que interpreta a Ari Gold, un judío agente de estrellas de cine que encarna todos los arquetipos del perfecto white-collar killer. Mordaz y despiadado, Ari Gold le ha reportado varios Emmys a su intérprete y ha protagonizado la que es, para mi, la mejor escena de la historia de la serie.

GOSSIP GIRL

Decid de mi lo que queráis, pero yo todos los martes tengo una cita pendiente con la crema del Upper East Side neoyorquino para empaparme de sus cotilleos, traiciones, desengaños y maquinaciones. Gossip Girl podría pasar perfectamente por la típica serie para adolescentes hiperhormonados. El clásico Física&Química yanqui, vamos. Pero nada más lejos de la realidad; Gossip Girl tiene un guión cuidado y sin giros imposibles que ya va por su tercer año de éxito, una banda sonora bien escogida y unas interpretaciones creíbles y auténticas. La palma se la lleva Chuck Bass, ese enfant terrible con Visa oro que es el sueño húmedo de todas las chicas que conozco, y el lado oculto del golfo que todos llevamos dentro. La publicidad de la serie, como habéis podido observar, no le va a la zaga.

LOST

Un clásico, ¿no?. Esta serie me engancha tanto que sólo la veo cuando tengo al menos una temporada más “de reserva”. Just in case de que me de la neura y el final de cada temporada no me deje conciliar el sueño, siempre es bueno interponer al menos veinte capítulos entre la actualidad y yo. Creo que no hace falta que explique mucho sobre lo que es LOST, y de hecho aunque quisiera no podría ya que ni sus propios guionistas se aclaran, y sin embargo esta serie tiene algo extrañamente atrayente para mi. Bienvenidos a la isla.

HOUSE

Le han salido imitadores en todos los campos. Médicos, abogados, policías.. pero sólo él es el borde original por excelencia. House lleva seis años dando cera a todo el que se cruce por su camino. A pesar de su constante acidez (pH<1) también hemos podido comprobar que tiene un corazoncito latiendo entre tanta Vicodina. House es el médico que nadie se quiere encontrar en la consulta, excepto cuando de lo que se trata es de que te salven la vida.

FLASHFORWARD

No, no me he comido un espacio. El tapado de esta temporada se escribe todo junto. Esta serie de premoniciones temporales está a punto de estrenar su quinto capítulo y sus productores ya han firmado una temporada entera gracias al éxito que ha tenido. Un reparto de lujo con Joseph Fiennes al mando y un guión sin huecos y con cierto toque lostiano hacen de esta serie una candidata fija a ocupar mi ancho de banda del Viernes. Muy recomendable y, aunque soy consciente de la pereza que da ahora que Cuatro la emite casi en directo, es obligatorio verla en inglés.

Fy, det var ett tag sen man skrev något här. Vet inte riktigt varför. Har inte varit på humöret senaste tiden och har inte haft lust helt enkelt. Men nu ska det bli bättring på detta ( I promise ).

Så vad har hänt sen sist. Jo, när det gäller musik så har jag haft inte så mycket att göra. Spelar inte på Platå längre ( fråga inte varför, för jag vet inte det själv ), och det har varit rätt så skönt att faktiskt kunna ha tid till annat. Jag har varit otroligt dålig på att hålla kontakt med mina vänner ( vilket jag har en förklaring till , som jag inte tänker dela med alla här ), men det ska bli ändring på detta. Sedan mitt senaste inlägg skrevs här så har följande hänt ;

Min bror har tagit ett stort kliv i sitt liv och gift sig. Hans underbara tjej sedan många år tillbaka är nu Fru Mutic. Stort grattis till dem och jag önskar dem givetvis all lycka i världen.

Min kusin har gjort detsamma. Gått och blivit man han med. Ni fattar inte vilken press jag har på mig nu; ni vet, hos oss blattar ska man ha gjort sånt innan 30. Här är man 31 och har inte ens en tanke på det.

När det gäller musik så har jag bytt från Ableton till Logic. Mest för att jag inte får tag i Ableton 8 till Mac ( då kan inte vill köpa skiten, IGEN ) men också för att Logic har så sjukt mycket mer att erbjuda, när det gäller sättet jag vill producera musik .

Nu till det som är riktigt viktigt, Ari Gold´s finest. Några oförglömliga quotes från Ari Gold. Man önskar bara att man kunde säga saker han säger .

Här kommer några klassiker :

1. Ari (to Lizzy): You so much as eyefuck an agent in this building, and I will deport you naked to the Taliban.

2. Lloyd: I’m gonna make it through this Ari Gold!
Ari: It will be worse then when you had your anal cherry popped, but hey, you just might.

3. Andrew: Not bad, but I’m talking about Lizzy Grant..
Ari: The junior agent with the great ass. Is she offering it up?

4. Ari: Die, die, die Lloyd! And when you’re gagging on Davies’ balls I want you to bite down, so he can die too!

5. Ari: Have you ever heard of a fucking prenup?
Terrence: Oh, you have one?
Ari: I’d kill my wife before I got a divorce.

Det var 5 otroligt sköna quotes by Mr.Gold . Och varje inlägg fr.o.m nu kommer påbörjas med en ny qoute. Imorgon kommer ni läsa lite mer om musik och utrustning och lite annat smått och gott .

Ari Gold is not at peace. Never has been, and apparently never will be- not if bullshit like this keeps happening. You can’t get good help: That’s the one thing that’s never changed since the old days.

And they still get out of his way when he walks down the hall- that hasn’t changed either. You would too, if you saw the Ari Gold of 2039 coming at you. The big pistol on his belt, the bulging arm muscles, obvious even under his suit. And then there’s those legs- cosmetic surgery has come a long way in thirty years. It’s hard to even call it cosmetic anymore, when the recipient’s leg looks more like a horse’s, and he can (and has) knocked people stone cold unconscious with one kick to the head.

It’s obvious to Ari what happened. They came up through the tunnels, under the wall. The places his men are supposed to be charting, and mining, if they weren’t so scared, and lazy, and worthless. They’re still scrubbing the blood off the walls and taking the bodies away when Ari gets there. He feels nothing for these men, nothing at all. They were weak, and lazy, and careless. All the evidence he needs to make this judgment is right there in front of him, stiffening by the minute.

In a few minutes Ari finds the storeroom he was looking for, the place where they came in. A quick inspection, and he knows exactly who he’s dealing with. The calling card is handed to him a second later by an underling who literally turns and flees in terror before Ari can say a word to him. The black card, blacker now with dried blood, only confirms what Mr. Gold already knows.

He reads the label anyway: “The Murphy Group.” A little smile curls on the end of his lip. They realize, of course, that this means war.

Meanwhile: Turtle’s slow breathing is the only movement in his cell. There is no light, no sound, no nothing. Right now there is not even Turtle. He throws his entire self into the meditative void with an almost Trappist zeal.

Ari Gold is meditating too. His practice area is a little different: For starters, there’s the gigantic gold-plated Buddha that almost envelops Mr. Gold as he sits cross-legged in front of it on the giant, Opium-den-red pillow. There are Buddhas everywhere, and maybe a few of the more well-known Hindu deities for good measure. As he sits, Ari’s mind is not what a Zen teacher would consider “clear” by any stretch. When he closes his eyes, his anger does not dissipate. No, quite the opposite. With his concern temporarily withdrawn from the waking world, Mr. Gold’s rages are free to careen though the black gulf of his semi-consciousness , like pulsars transmitting through deep space.

But maybe that is a kind of meditation. Beggars can’t be choosers. And maybe, just maybe, on some astral plane, the minds of Ari and Turtle meet. They’ve had thirty years after all, to get to know each other, to get inside each other’s thoughts. Thirty years since that fateful day when Turtle barged into the offices of the Miller/Gold agency and demanded Ari helped him go into business. He’d said “no,” of course, given the kid some big, half-made-up lecture about what it had been like for him starting out, and then sent him on his way with no help whatsoever- just as a matter of principle. That had been the beginning. And now, the beginning of the end.

Ari, lost in memory, is maybe the only thing in his entire fiefdom not moving right now: In the cyborg workshops under the Silver Lake reservoir, in the hangars and barracks of what was once the Paramount lot, from the tops of skyscrapers and half a mile under the Hollywood Hills, Mr Gold’s people are preparing to make war.

But first, dinner. Ari halted his practice mid-breath and stood to the meditation cabana. If he’s going to unleash hell, why not a little taste of heaven first? He walks to the table, where a lavish meal is waiting: The finest veal still gettable anywhere west of the Great Divide, and an eight year old Bordeaux brought up from the deep cellar for the occasion. His face bathed in red-tinted candlelight, Mr. Gold eats.

People love them stars, yes sir they most certainly do. Look at how they carry themselves some mutter. Don’t they look perfect together? How is she so thin? Why is he so brooding? Why am I talking to the LCD?

The fold is always happy to provide the answers:

Physics.
No.
Surgery.
Tosser.
The crystal!

If we were to distance ourselves from the glossed silicone for two minutes, we would see that every acclaimed emmy-coveted docu-dramedy has a support performance of such brilliance and restrained subtlety – you barely notice they damn near made the show.

Heres six of the best.

Hiro Nakamura (Heroes, played by Masi Oka)

It’s disappointing to see how far our heroes have fallen from season to season. You can fly for Christ sake – go take a trip, look at the Northern Lights. Let’s see if that doesn’t broaden the horizons you sulking little cretins. While many have faltered over the years, one has remained true to his mission statement and true to the fans – Hiro Nakamura. Yes Hiro, the subtitled bit, where the texts jumps around like a giddy school girl and the fans scream Waffle! Hiro is the only realistic portrayal of an otherwise unfathomable high-concept. Put simply, if you had powers you would enjoy them. And Hiro certainly does that. It has now got to the stage where I simply gloss over the screen until that cheery chubby cherub turns up to save the day.

Ari Gold (Entourage, played by Jeremy Piven)

Like it, Loath it. It is probably because of one man – Jeremy Piven’s alter-ego onanist Ari Gold. Piven brings such a high level of intensity to the character that its got many people wondering how does the man do it. I heard through the grapevine he isn’t actually acting. Fair dues though.

Tobias Funke (Arrested Development, played by David Cross)

While the cast of Arrested Development nailed their roles to absolute perfection, it was David Cross’ Tobias Funke that stood out amongst the rest. Cross plays ambivalence down to a science, and in a strong emsemble, somehow managed to steal the show with each one of his pathetic attempts. Arrested Development went under the radar over here and if you haven’t heard of the program I strongly recommend having a ganders. We could all do with a bit more Funke in our lives (sorry, no more puns – im better than this!).

Jack Donaghy (30 Rock, played by Alec Baldwin)

Ladies, Mr Jack Donaghy. NBC’s head of television programming and microwave ovens and a voice that would make a wolverine purr. Since I keep throwing out statements as facts, I shall continue to keep balance. He is the greatest suit to ever appear on television, with humour so dry he could pass for cider. Alec may be known stateside for his numerous SNL appearances. Over here we know him for straight to dvd flicks. But I think it’s time Baldwin Sr. got a few more roles thrown his way – we can forgive him for Sisters Keeper.

Benjamin Linus (Lost, played by Michael Emerson)

It’s a piece of piss to play the lead on a primetime show. You got a chin? You got the part stubbles! To play the creep though; you need a solid thespian. Linus has mastered the art of being the unnerving, unknowing specimen that has become the hallmark of the franchise. Oh he’s so evil, so bloody weird looking! The fans passionate disdain for this character speaks volumes of just how good a job Michael Emerson is doing. For this reason, I think he might just be my favourite character on the most frustrating, unrewarding programme to have ever been conceived by man.

Omar Little (The Wire, played by Michael K. Williams)

There are too many strong performances in The Wire to mention in this one post, but you knew if you had to pick one, only one, it would be Omar Little. The homosexual-gangster-whistling-robin-hood-assassin takes the biscuit for strange hyphenated partners. I’m pretty certain David Simon simply threw contradictory stereotypes into a bucket, tossed them against a wall and brought to life one of the most compelling characters in television history. This takes nothing away from Mr K. Williams performance. Brando put cotton wool in his mouth and talked like a chimp for an Oscar. Omar has not only redefined ethnic categorisation in contemporary culture (listen to Kane and Ghet’s for proof of the pud), he’s done it with a kick in his step and a whistle in his…

Anyways. Keep ya leads, we got these.

Dré

Not that I would ever do it, so kudos to Yvonne.  She is taking part in a feel better “Hug-a-thon” today in New Haven.  That’s a pretty big time deal.  To get a warm embrace from Connecticut’s favorite morning anchor.  So Get there early, I imagine a long line.  The even starts at two pm.  This also reminds me of other “famous” hugs.  There is Ari from Entourage:

Huggy Bear Old School: and new school:Diapers:

Dave hugs: and a funny bear hug: 

Also, a great way to brighten up a mood:  a scoop of ice cream at 8:30am.  No, it’s not breakfast, I had that at 2:30, this was a mid-day snack(sorry, that was for my wife and her best friend.) 

Enjoy you Wednesday.

-Jason-

Nu kör vi!

Dags att lägga en värdelös fredag bakom sig och dunka friskt resten av veckan.

Som en sann säljare har man värmt upp i helgen med att kolla säsongsavslutningen av Entourage, vem blir liksom inte taggad på att kränga grejer av att se Ari Gold in action. Där har vi en kille som kan sälja stenar på Honö.

Don’t forget to catch fellow “Adaumbelle’s Quest” participants Ari Gold & CeyJay Jumao-as performing together in Tuscan, Arizona’s Gay Pride Saturday, October 10. Two “Adaumbelle’s Quest” participants in one place, you know Tuscan is the place to be!

Well, if its Friday, then it must be time once again for your friendly neighborhood GonzoGeeks to share their favorite finds from the internet this week.

Because nobody asked, LinkFrogging, a term created by Stephe, is that activity where you follow a link off the page you were looking for and then another link and another until you find yourself in some dark scary corner of the net inhabited by Furries and vampires.

This week’s slice of cheesecake is Kate Beckinsale who was voted the “World’s Sexiest Woman” by Esqurire this month.  Its a nice change of pace from all the incessant coverage of Megan Fox, her tattoos and minimal acting skills. 

On to the links…

1. One of the Seattle Mariners broadcast crew/regular media makes an impressive prediction.
2. Cory Booker, the mayor of Newark who’s having a “feud” with Conan O’Brien, is a really interesting guy, as evidenced by the documentary “Street Fight” (chronicling his race to become mayor) and this follow-up article in Time Magazine.
3. Crappy Canadian Thanksgiving, starring Juno’s Ellen Page, Dodgeball’s Justin Long and pop music god Har Mar Superstar.
4. It looks like Ron Howard has finally beaten some sense into Michael Cera.
5. Smart Football (the most in-depth blog we’ve seen as pertains to game strategy) breaks down how Florida’s offense looks different without Tim Tebow.
6. College football guru, Phil Steele, picks every football bowl subdivision game in the country every week.  This link is for entertainment purposes only, of course.
7. Is Nickelback the worst band ever?
8. Since my team, Coconut Bangers Ball, started 0-3…
9. Keeping with the NFL theme.
10. I hope he has been practicing his Shaq-Fu.
11. Speaking of MMA (WARNING CONTAINS BLOOD).
12. He should have tapped!
13. Stay classy Miguel!
14. Another theory on the identity of Jack the Ripper.
15. Eric Berry “gets it” more than any star athlete John has been around.
16. The latest from the Mayor of Parts Unknown.
17. Just a humble little independent wrestling federation in east Tennessee.
18. Downsizing…Ari Gold style.
19. Matt Damon was the funniest part of the Entourage season.
20. Superhero Facebook updates.
21. Speaking of superheroes, maybe the movie madness has gone too far.
22. Will require a viewer to translate, or be content with cool pictures.
23. And finally, another plug for my friend David’s Iraq deployment blog.

Live with style

De fleste drømmer om det, men ganske få opnår det…

En ekstravagant livsstil med store huse, hurtige biler og gudesmukke kvinder…

Det tætteste jeg kommer på en luksuriøs livsstil er mit fladskærmstv, min Armani Black Code og den tjekkede drengerøvsserie Entourage..

Hvis du ikke har stiftet bekendtskab med drengerne fra Entourage, syntes jeg bestemt, at du skulle overveje at tænde for TV2 Zulu, når denne glimrende serie kører over skærmen!

Baggrunden for serien er sådan set meget simpel: Producer Mark Walhberg mente, at hans liv mere eller mindre kunne laves til en TV-serie, og det må man sige, Marky-Mark havde ret i, da serien nu kører på 6. sæson…

Serien følger superstar Vincent Chase (Adrian Grenier) i sin jagt på damer og filmprojekter i selskab med sit entourage i form af manager Eric Murphy (Kevin Connolly), brormand og falleret skuespiller Johnny “Drama” Chase (Kevin Dillon) og den lille altmuligmand “Turtle” (Jerry Ferrara).

De fire gutter fører en, mildest talt, komfortabel tilværelse i og omkring den amerikanske filmindustri, og mens kvinderne dåner over Sex & The City livsstilen!, har mændene endelig fået en pendant i Entourage (Ikke at Sex & The Fucking City kan sammenlignes med Entourage!!)…

Den cool livsstil bliver krydret med en flabet agent i form af Ari Gold, som bliver fornemt spillet af Jeremy Piven… Hans one-liners og hyper personlighed blandet med vulgære gloser gør Ari Gold til en af mine personlige favoritter i showet..

Men hvad er det så helt præcist vi bliver hypnotiseret af???

Øhmm, alt for fanden!

Der er de hurtige biler, naturligvis! Aston Martin, Maserati, Rolls Royce og Hummeren er alle repræsenteret på bilfronten, og hvem ville ikke ønske, de stod ude i garagen i stedet for en Toyota fra 1984.

Så er der vejret…! Hvorfor pokker er man ikke et sted, hvor solen skinner 24-7, og folk ikke kender til vejrfænomenet vind…. Så sidder man herhjemme og kigger ud på vejrhanen, som er ved at knække af pga. stormvejr, mens regnen er ved at drukne gråspurven ude i fuglehuset….

Endvidere er der de fænomenale omgivelser… Kæmpehuse, som får Amalienborg til at ligne en lerhytte, skyder op alle vegne omkring Vince og co. med tilbehør som swimmingpools og haver på størrelse med 22 cricketbaner..

På toppen af kransekagen finder vi storslåede fester, lækkert mad og gorgeous kvinder, og så kan man sidde hjemme i sofaen og savle over løjerne på skærmen, mens de sorte frikadeller, du har sat på bordet som aftensmad, langsomt bliver kolde.

I de 25 minutter, som Entourage varer, kan du flygte fra en knap så glamourøs og problemfri hverdag, og jeg byder den oplevelse velkommen med åbne arme.