IV. – Rappelle-toi depuis combien de temps tu remets à plus tard et combien de fois, ayant reçu des Dieux des occasions de t’acquitter, tu ne les as pas mises à profit. Mais il faut enfin, dès maintenant, que tu sentes de quel monde tu fais partie, et de quel être, régisseur du monde, tu es une émanation, et qu’un temps limité te circonscrit. Si tu n’en profites pas, pour accéder à la sérénité, ce moment passera ; tu passeras aussi, et jamais plus il ne reviendra.

V. – A tout moment, songe avec gravité, en Romain et en mâle, à faire ce que tu as en mains, avec une stricte et simple dignité, avec amour, indépendance et justice, et à donner congé à toutes les autres pensées. Tu le leur donneras, si tu accomplis chaque action comme étant la dernière de ta vie, la tenant à l’écart de toute irréflexion, de toute aversion passionnée qui t’arracherait à l’empire de la raison, de toute feinte, de tout égoïsme et de tout ressentiment à l’égard du destin. Tu vois combien sont peu nombreux les préceptes dont il faut se rendre maître pour pouvoir vivre d’une vie paisible et passée dans la crainte des Dieux, car les Dieux ne réclameront rien de plus à qui les observe.

VI. – Injurie-toi, injurie-toi, ô mon âme ! Tu n’auras plus l’occasion de t’honorer toi-même. Brève, en effet, est la vie pour chacun. La tienne est presque achevée, et tu n’as pas de respect pour toi-même, car tu mets ton bonheur dans les âmes des autres.

VII. – Les accidents du dehors te distraient-ils ? Donne-toi le loisir d’apprendre quelque bonne vérité, et cesse de te laisser emporter par le tourbillon. Évite aussi désormais cet autre égarement. Insensés, en effet, sont ceux qui, à force d’agir, sont fatigués par la vie, et n’ont pas un but où diriger tout leur élan et, tout à la fois, leur pensée tout entière.

I. – Dès l’aurore, dis-toi par avance : « Je rencontrerai un indiscret, un ingrat, un insolent, un fourbe, un envieux, un insociable. Tous ces défauts sont arrivés à ces hommes par leur ignorance des biens et des maux. Pour moi, ayant jugé que la nature du bien est le beau, que celle du mal est le laid, et que la nature du coupable lui-même est d’être mon parent, non par la communauté du sang ou d’une même semence, mais par celle de l’intelligence et d’une même parcelle de la divinité, je ne puis éprouver du dommage de la part d’aucun d’eux, car aucun d’eux ne peut me couvrir de laideur. Je ne puis pas non plus m’irriter contre un parent, ni le prendre en haine, car nous sommes nés pour coopérer, comme les pieds, les mains, les paupières, les deux rangées de dents, celle d’en haut et celle d’en bas. Se comporter en adversaires les uns des autres est donc contre nature, et c’est agir en adversaire que de témoigner de l’animosité et de l’aversion. »

II. – Tout ce que je suis, c’est une chair, avec un souffle et un principe directeur. Renonce aux livres ; ne te laisse pas absorber : ce ne t’est point permis. Mais, comme un homme déjà en passe de mourir, méprise la chair : sang et poussière, petits os, tissu léger de nerfs et entrelacement de veines et d’artères. Examine aussi ce qu’est le souffle : du vent qui n’est pas toujours le même car à tout moment tu le rends pour en avaler d’autre. Il te reste, en troisième lieu, le principe directeur. Pense à ceci : tu es vieux ; ne permets plus qu’il soit esclave, qu’il soit encore comme tiré par les fils d’une égoïste impulsion, ni qu’il s’aigrisse contre son sort actuel, ou bien qu’il appréhende celui qui doit Venir.

III. -Les œuvres des Dieux sont pleines de providence ; celles de la Fortune ne se font pas sans la nature ou sans être filées et tissées avec les événements que dirige la Providence. Tout découle de là. De plus, tout ce qui arrive est nécessaire et utile au monde universel, dont tu fais partie. Aussi, pour toute partie de la nature, le bien est-il ce que comporte la nature universelle et ce qui est propre à sa conservation. Or, ce qui conserve le monde, ce sont les transformations des éléments, aussi bien que celles de leurs combinaisons. Que cela te suffise et te serve de principes. Quant à ta soif de livres, rejette-la, afin de ne pas mourir en murmurant, mais véritablement apaisé et le cœur plein de gratitude envers les Dieux.

Stretches and a little exercise helped me stay awake for this morning’s meditation. Detecting “stickiness,” as I observed thoughts/images/feelings arise and pass — but I didn’t get lost in it as I often do. Got stuck briefly (well, it felt like a long time) on that weird “chalkboard-scratchy” feeling at my throat (where I had a thyroidectomy many years ago). Buzzy feelings there, emotional-screechy; then series of small “waves” in throat area that made my throat/jaw/head shake slightly.

TORONTO (Dow Jones)–Even a small change in the U.S. Federal Reserve’s statement Wednesday could prompt a big reaction in foreign exchange rates, given the uncertain mood in the market and the speculation about what the Fed might say.

Few expect a substantial change in the Fed’s position when its two-day meeting concludes Wednesday. But a slight change in nuance in the statement that accompanies the Fed decision could have a major impact on a market thirsting for any hint of how the U.S. central bank will exit from its stimulative policy stance.

“While rates are almost guaranteed to remain at current levels, any sort of shift in policy stance or, more importantly, tone … could send [forex] volatility through the roof,” says a report from Jamie Heighway, a market analyst at Custom House, a currency services firm in Victoria, B.C., Canada.

However, a big reaction to the Fed statement isn’t guaranteed; a status quo statement would only elicit a shrug from currency traders. Also, the chance exists that a status quo statement is exactly what will be forthcoming from the U.S. central bank.

While it acknowledged the U.S. economy was leveling out in its last policy statement Aug. 12, that process might not be advanced enough to warrant any significant change in posture from the Fed.

Analysts believe a debate is likely between Fed decision makers about whether to signal the beginning of the end of stimulative policy, or in the parlance of the day, to discuss its “exit strategy.” But that debate might remain behind closed doors until there’s compelling evidence the recovery is robust enough to withstand even just an intimation of higher rates from the Fed.

In the meantime, the market is anxious for the next chapter in the global recovery to unfold. It’s starting to put the push and pull of risk appetite/risk aversion behind it and wants to begin focusing on interest rates and other fundamentals.

A Fed statement that offers any hint that rate tightening is in the works could therefore be pivotal for the U.S. dollar and other major currencies.

“We think the Fed statement is going to be important, and it’s going to be surprisingly more hawkish than people think,” said Greg Salvaggio, senior vice president of capital markets at Tempus Consulting in Washington.

He will be watching for a timetable from Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke and his colleagues for the increase of interest rates next year. “Falling short of establishing a timetable, he will indicate that they believe the economy is recovering and that excess stimulus and capacity in the system will need to be soon addressed,” Salvaggio said.

Such a stance would have a positive impact on the dollar, he said. “If I was positioning ahead of the Fed, that is the trade I would take,” he said.

A more status quo statement could intensify pressure on the U.S. currency or at least leave recent selling pressure unchecked.

“The less change there is, the worse it is for the dollar, at this point,” said Vassili Serebriakov, currency strategist at Wells Fargo Bank in New York.

“The status quo from the Fed would imply status quo for the currency markets, and that is to continue selling the dollar,” he said.

If the Fed does provide more substance on exit strategies, the market could reconsider some of the recent weakness in the dollar, Serebriakov said.

“It’s probably not going to be a medium-term dollar-trend turnaround at this point, but at least we won’t see further dollar weakness,” he said.

(Don Curren, a reporter based in Toronto, has covered Canadian currency and fixed-income markets for more than 10 years. He can be reached at 416-306-2020 or at don.curren@dowjones.com.)

Saturday and Sunday nights are now reserved for reading and research. My work-a-day routine has taken a turn for the worse with a new assignment, perhaps the worst in my military career. Much more busy than before, but with nothing to really do but go through the motions and hope for the best. By far the least challenging, least rewarding assignment I’ve ever had, with perhaps the least constructive guidance and the most uninspiring and disinterested leadership.

It could be a deal breaker for me — once the organization you trust and love turns its back on you, with the cold shrug of institutional impunity, it’s time to move on. (I believe the term used in the familiar patois of my organization would be to “suck it up”. I never “suck it up” for very long. I’m not that kind of Marine.) To be fair, the USMC has invested a significant amount of time and treasure in me…all the more reason for me to wonder why it seems so passive about this investment. I took it seriously. I believe I’ve demonstrated this amply. To no avail. On a personal level, a colonel has made a deliberate decision to sacrifice my career in order to satisfy a temporary but non-urgent requirement. (We have a phrase for that: “Needs of the Marine Corps”.) So be it.

I try to remind myself that this is what happens in any large organization, when the bureaucracy tends to sacrifice purpose and creativity to process and procedure at precisel the wrong time for a useful asset. Despite the logic and actions of the individual who has condemned me to this posting, perhaps I’m after all just a number, a statistic, a check in the box, a code on some staffer’s spreadsheet back in Quantico or DC. Perhaps my perception of my own value to the organization is overestimated. Nobody is irreplaceable, after all. There are more than 200 thousand people in this organization now and its strategic focus has been stretched in unprecedented ways. Not surprising that a few of us who were once promised bright futures should languish in the inertia of what is still a government agency trying to find its way in “uncertain times” — whatever those may seem to be to the decision-makers.

Anyway, the point is that I’ve had to sacrifice a bit of personal time to maintain my commitment to what has become a passion. It is a bitter pill for wifeykins, but she is on board as long as I am careful and don’t overstretch. I’ve been in tighter spots before. I know I’ll succeed. I will balance family, friends, profession, person and passion once again. With a little moto riding and maybe some lolcats surfing in between.

Enough of the throat clearing. The markets seem nervous. We seem to be in the eye of the storm right about now. Winds have abated. The sails are slack. The tell-tails are fluttering in no particular direction. The skies seem clear, but there is an uneasy pressure and smell in the air. The light is a bit strange. “Not quite right,” as wifey would say. Ambient noise seems oddly attenuated, muffled. What will happen to the USD? What will happen to equities in the US, Europe and Asia? What will happen with crude, gold and ags? Where are the funds? Where is the real money? What is following what? Who is following who? We know the other side of the storm is coming. What will be the best course of action?

As for the who part, I think hedge funds are following the real money. In the US markets, the funds are late to the risk party and will probably get hammered (again) unless the rally extends through the end of the year. Bravo to those funds who were winners. This has been a tough year for them and we aren’t even on the final lap yet. Most of the flows are still moving out of USD and US equities to MOE — markets other than Europe. This is one of the reasons I added to the short EURUSD trade — because the flows certainly aren’t going into Europe as far as I know. There is little yield to be had there and risk aversion trading will gain substantial momentum starting in October, if not this coming week, and continue into 2010. Probably helpful for my EURUSD short, but not very much for the USDJPY long, as another unwinding of too hastily taken young carry trades will benefit both USD and JPY. Probably the former less than the latter. But when will this unwinding occur? And then at what level will it be good to get back in? (Note to self: Watch NZD and AUD, as well as treasuries.)

I would like to build a large-ish short ES position in the 1180-1100 area, but I think I’ll stay tactical for now because markets usually tend to move further than any rational explanation would allow. (One of the principles behind the Knotty positioning strategy, but I’m not well capitalized enought to execute this strategy in the futures markets and would get a margin call holding ES over a several thousand tick range!) My expectation is that the S&P could move as high as 1150, but that it will eventually retrace to 750 at least. I may also take tactical shorts 6E over the same time horizon. But what about the yen? This is what I’m trying to make sense of at the moment.

FM Fujii has made some careless but revealing remarks, and I like them. Letting economic conditions determine the value of the yen more than narrow interests and cronyism would allow me to get a better feel for general direction. Time will tell if Hatoyama’s regime can make it a reality. I don’t think Fujii’s remarks mean the yen will appreciate to wild and wacky levels, but I doubt the yen will weaken much in the near term. We certainly won’t see 100 anytime soon. (I’m still hoping for 97.40, however.) And then there is the meeting between President Obama and President Hu ahead of the G20 meeting. Both are very formidable minds from very different intellectual spaces. Wish I could be a fly on that wall. In any event, I’ll be paying attention to the buzz around that meeting.

Leading indicators coming out that will put that meeting into context as well. I’m interested in what the Fed will say about an exit strategy — or what it won’t say. I can’t imagine the Fed will extend QE much more. I just can’t imagine it. Seems something would snap. The G20 itself will probably be a sleeper. The sideshows during and after will be interesting, however. Probably lots of the typical BS from China, Russia and Japan and lord only knows from who else. And of course, our own brand of it here in the US — hard to tell which branch of government is more full of it, these days. Most of the stink will probably be about trade. China’s predatory practices vs. our protectionism, is how the MSM will probably frame it. In reality, it is China’s predatory practices and its protectionism, vs. our protectionism. This is why the US and others will have no choice but to do what they do. China itself has no choice. It cannot develop internal markets fast enough so it must engage in predatory trade. Financed by our debt. It is a matter of survival for China’s regime, which has no intention of letting go of power. I digress. Any progress between Obama and Hu in the meetings ahead of and after the G20 session will be good for risk appetite. I’ll be watching for that from a tactical standpoint.

Check out the remarks made by Almunia with respect to Chinese diversification into the euro. To sum up: “No bueno.” Developing…

Today was a very exhausting day for me. I had to take the little one to hospital to get her legs checked out. Nothing serious, but it did involve examination and an x-ray.

We went to Whittington Hospital and I have to admit it was one of the worst places I’ve been to. The appointment time was completely unsuitable for a toddler (over lunch and nap time). They let us wait for over an hour before we finally spoke to the doctor (ever tried keeping a toddler busy for more than 20 mins in a boring waiting room??). Then we were sent to x-ray where we had to wait another 30 mins. The little one was seriously scared of the doctor and the x-ray terrified her and afterwards I had trouble getting her to sleep, even though she was simply exhausted. What an amazing day.

I can’t wait for next week when the children centres open again properly and the stay and plays start again. I am just planning which groups we’ll try out next week and I’ll publish what I thought of the groups here. I am surprised how little information about different toddler groups are provided online.

I’m not one to usually recycle news without some sort of comment/insight (errr… at least, not on a consistent basis and based on reporting from other sites), but the following news (as reported by Aversion) certainly speaks for itself:

Much to the delight of uptight moms and punk kids alike, Brokencyde’s pulled out of the Warped Tour.

No reasons were given for the band’s departure from the last four stops on the package shoe commercial/sort-of punk festival.

I guess this is where I’d normally add some two cents to the mix, but I’m honestly a little confused by the news. Chances are something must have happened to affect one of the members of brokeNCYDE personally, which, despite any reservations one may have about scrunk/crunkcore, must be bad enough to warrant such an action and isn’t something to make fun of.

But, as of now, there’s nothing to support the following claim:

Hopefully some more info will be made available to clear up these questions…

EDIT: I knew something might be a little off about this info, as Warped Tour wrapped up yesterday… still no info about this, so unless something new comes out, put this matter aside…

I’ve always had a problem the show The Biggest Loser.  I just never liked the title.  I thought it was demeaning towards obese people.  Yet it was my family (who are regular watchers) that pointed out how empowering the fitness program is for the contestants on the show and the life changes it produces for them – and possibly by extension the viewers watching.  Well, I have to admit that I am now in agreement with them – even though I still don’t like the title.  Here’s why.

Humans hate to lose.  We hate to be a loser.  Research has shown that we will go out of our way to avoid losing something.   The psychological phenomenon of “loss aversion” illustrates that a loss has two times the emotional impact that a gain of the same value has.  This is tied to “risk aversion” in the sense that we will go out of our way to avoid a loss even if the payoff from risking the loss is big.

Now, apply this to weight management.  Why would anyone want to lose weight? The goal of dieting to lose weight is at direct odds with our tendency for loss aversion.   Even if all that fat is something we don’t want, losing it has a bigger emotional impact than the reward of having lost it.    If that doesn’t make sense to you then re-read the paragraph above that starts with “humans hate to lose”.

So if the reward of being fit doesn’t outweigh the negative emotion of loss (of all that fat), then the logical solution is to find a bigger negative emotion to trump the aversion of losing fat.    A bigger negative emotion – how about embarrassment?   Yale Law School professors Ian Ayres and Barry Nalebuff tried just such a thing for a segment of ABC’s Primetime.   They took photographs of five volunteers in bikinis then told them that they needed to lose 15 pounds in two months.  If they didn’t they were going to reveal the bikini photos on national television and on the Web.   What happened?  They all lost the weight.  The fear of loosing their reputation, prestige or honor was greater than their loss of fat.   Sometimes we try this on our own when we say “I don’t want to feel embarrassed in my bathing suit  this summer so I’ll loose 15 pounds in two months”.  But there are too many outs.  If we fail, we can just buy a different suit, or just go to the beach in our clothes.  We need some means to hold us accountable, other than ourselves.

Programs like Weight Watchers can be helpful for some, but again, the focus is on weight loss.    We need the focus to be on fitness with failure tied to a bigger emotional loss.  That’s the idea behind the website stikk.com where you take a contract out on yourself and stake something of value that you risk loosing if you fail to meet your goal.    Let’s say you set a goal of loosing 20 pounds in 20 weeks, or 1 pound a week.   Then you stake some money, let’s say $10 per week.  If you fail to loose the 1 pound, stikk charges your credit card for the $10 and gives it to someone you designate or a favorite charity or (and I like this one) an anti-charity!

An anti-charity is an organization that you can’t stand.  So the stakes are even higher – your $10 per week might be going to that organization that makes you cringe at the very mention of its name.   Now we’re talking real loss as the fat melts away and you achieve the reward of greater fitness and a trim body.  There is some research however, that suggests that money isn’t always the best motivator in weight loss.  That’s why what ever you stake on your progress must have the potential to be big – for you.

Okay, I’m not trying to promote the stikk.com website,  but what I am trying to illustrate is that losing is contrary to our human nature.  So if you want to change your body or any aspect of yourself, a twist on the old adage rings true – if there’s no risk of pain, there’s likely to be no gain.   I think this is also one of the factors that makes the show The Biggest Loser worthwhile.    In that show it’s not just about winning the grand prize, it’s also about being honorable in losing.

Sources:

NPR

Yale Law School

Wikipedia

StikK.com

New York Times

Rule: Total Acceptance

I Hate Vegetables

Meera aged twelve, doesn’t fancy vegetables in any form and fruits as well. She wanted to change he diet pattern.

Shobana taught her EFT informally and gave her the affirmation, “Even though I don’t like to eat vegetables and fruits, I choose to accept myself totally”.

Within three days of tapping on herself, Meera could comfortably start eating vegetables and fruits.

Sleepless in Chennai

Venu was doing his last year in an Engineering College. So he had a many a late night preparations for the final year exam and the project as well.

He didn’t mind going to sleep late, though he found it difficult to sleep well.

He will be lying in bed for an hour or two, before he can go into a sleep. In addition, he was getting few nightmares too. Therefore, when he gets up in the morning, he was feeling tired and restless.

Accept Myself Totally

After hearing about Meera from Shobana, he affirmed the following while tapping on him:

“Even though I am not happy about my progress in my studies, I choose to accept myself totally”.

“Even though I feel as a looser, I choose to accept myself totally”.

He started sleeping well.

He is continuing this approach for other problems as well. He find as long as he can accept himself in a situation, he is able to handle the situation comfortably.

ADVANTAGE Acceptance

“I choose to accept myself totally” – what does that mean.

It means we accept ‘My feelings’, ‘My Thoughts’ and ‘My Life Situations’ as ‘Myself’ indicates all of them.

The energy stream produced among them can thus be settled amicably.

When you accept, what happens to the mind – which is the creator of all emotions and thoughts?

When you don’t observe the thoughts or emotions, they will dominate you. Then you are led by the mind. 

You will behave in the same way as you behaved in a similar situation from the past. Thus, one becomes a Robot.

When you affirm, “I accept myself totally”, the mind is baffled because it didn’t not expect any observation from you.

When you go on accepting the thoughts and emotions as they arise, they cannot stay in the same energy pool. Thus it won’t be able to sustain the old thinking cum action pattern.

New Choice New Behaviour

They just die down (get released) and you become free.  When you become free, you have a new choice. You can wait for events to unfold in a different way.

Accepting is nothing but changing the path of mind. Therefore, it can access a neural path and a new behavior is elicited.

I recently took up Ngondro meditation practice, and I think it’s working.  Ngondro is a set of meditation exercises designed to help you begin removing your head from your ass and become a more compassionate person. I was pretty discouraged early on, because I found out you have to do each of the 9 practices 100,000 times to complete a cycle. The way I see it, if I’m done in 10 years I’ll have worked at the limits of my capability for dilligence.

But now I’m encouraged. Here’s why: Last night I had a dream about a former arch-nemesis. We worked together several years ago, and as is the case with most of the people you come to hate vehemently, we started out as friends. She’s the kind of person who likes to play complicated games with people, and she eventually got around to doing it with me, and the aversion began.

Eventually she got a diagnosis that meant she might die soon, and she missed a lot of work. I was surprised to notice a complete lack of concern on my part. In fact, I started taking candy from the jar on her desk, knowing it would piss her off if she knew. Finally I realized that if this woman died, I would not care at all, that I would just finish all her candy and not have to worry about the repercussions. That bothered me.

Then she had surgery and her doctors discovered they’d made a mistake. Her health problem was not serious as it turned out. Soon she was back at work, and mad about her missing candy. Damn.

The day she returned, that bitch asked me if I’d been concerned about her welfare. When I said yes, we both knew I was lying, and I hated myself for being too scared to tell the truth. That ho had gotten the better of me again.

I knew enough about her to understand why she was such a mean, narcissistic freak. Intellectually, I did have compassion for her because it was so clear why she’d turned out the way she did. But I felt none in my heart. All I felt was fear that events might convene in such a way as to make me turn out the same way she did.

Anyway, last night I had a dream that the two of us were on a road trip together. I was pissed off and guarded about having to sit in a confined space with this person, but I found that her personality had softened and expanded somewhat. Though she didn’t apologize and I didn’t totally let my guard down, I did forgive her without saying so. I was stunned by what a relief it was to finally let that go.

So now I’m not as focused on the goal of doing 100,000 of each of nine meditation exercises, and I’m more excited about what might happen on the way.

I never used to question the motivation some people have to convert others to their religion. I always thought it was just the natural order of the world. You embrace the truth as you see it and try to get everyone else on board. The same goes with other issues like abortion, gay rights, drug policy reform. People usually come up with a set of evidence, present their arguments and convince some people that they’re right. But at some point I started to question the reasoning behind some people’s desire to convert others. Jehovah’s witnesses have an excuse that the only way they can get into heaven is if they recruit you and then the only way you can go to heaven is to recruit more people into what is likely the most zealous and self-righteous pyramid scheme movement ever conceived. That aside, most religions do not have a prerequisite that you are required to convert people to get into heaven. It’ll earn some points unless you’re a Calvinist but it’s not required. In Islam, you get earn points based on the actions of people you’ve taught, again

Since there’s no requirement to convert other people, we have to wonder about why some people are so adamant in their attempts. I’ve read that these people are insecure in their beliefs and need validation. The best way to get validation is see everyone around you agreeing with you (and ignoring those who disagree, as is only human).  This is why it’s so discomforting to have someone close to you who disagrees with your beliefs. It’s scary that someone whose opinion matters thinks you’re wrong. Another reason is that it looks good in front of other religious brethren to bring salvation to the masses. It’s certainly a great way to get noticed as a pillar of faith in the religious community except that such public displays are pompous and motivated by the worldly desire to be admired. God knows this of course, so if he existed, those hypocrites would burn in the flames. Another reason which is more obvious to religious people is that they want to get others into heaven, particularly their close friends. This sounds very nice and noble of them to want to help you out. I imagine my friends would be sad to not see me in heaven.

But hold on a minute there. What did I just say? My friends would be sad to not see me in heaven? How is that possible? Heaven is supposed to be an amazing place where we feel nothing but happiness, joy and satisfaction as an eternal reward for abstaining from worldly desires. If I were sure that I could get into heaven with just a baseline amount of worship, why would I bother doing anything more? Even if I thought there were multiple levels of heaven, what does it matter? Am I going to enjoy my first level less because there are higher levels? It’s not like there’s anything to gain in the grand scheme of it all. Envy and jealousy are human character flaws that we wouldn’t have in heaven since we are perfectly content. It’s silly to think that those of greater piety would be more perfectly content than others.

Forgetting about the absurdity of levels, even if there were heaven, where’s the motivation to do more than the bare minimum? In real life, it doesn’t always pay to put in 100% but it often does, especially when it’s revealed later that you worked hard. In life, how much you do and how hard you work often correlate with how well you do. This is ideal, but the heavenly scheme is far from ideal. Infinite punishment or reward for finite sin or merit, respectively, is not only unfair, but irrational. There is actually no real motivation to try to be more religious than is absolutely necessary to ensure a spot in heaven. People say that it’s not really being religious if you’re only doing it to get into heaven, but what else is there? The betterment of this world is meaningless in the scope of the situation, so you may as well enjoy what you can while you can and still skate by the guard at the gate.

If you say that it’s for the love of god, I challenge anyone to believe in and worship a god that they believe will definitely send them to hell anyway. There’s no way in the world that anyone would submit to a god or give up worldly pleasures in order to worship a god who banishes him/her to hell anyway without any chance for redemption. What would be the point? No one worships and loves god unconditionally. It’s based on the hope that god will let followers into heaven. That’s why preachers always toe the “seek salvation and you shall be saved” line and it’s also why Calvinism isn’t very popular. It’s a quid pro quo that has nothing to do with love or reverence. It’s just business.

It scares me,
knowing he does what I have done:
tracing my face, my habits,
the shape of my body with his eyes,
learning and sensationalizing everything about me.
Wishing I would touch him.
Wondering what a goddess’s hand
feels like on his face.

Let the universe be my spouse
and my next-of-kin be what I write.

     I know it has been a very long time since I last posted anything on this blog. It is not due to a lack of material, believe me. I have plenty to write about, but I haven’t found the time lately. I have much more I intend to write about and I hope that I can get to it sooner rather than later. Nevertheless, I do have a very short post to add.

     I have helped different people from around the world with English from time to time and as I have helped them to find the meanings of words in dictionaries I have started to notice something strange. In some of their electronic dictionaries they are given definitions that can hardly be regarded as definitions. I don’t know the rules of writing a dictionary definition, but I assume that you have to use detailed descriptions and not be allowed to use the same word to define its own meaning. Am I right or wrong on this? I don’t actually know.

     So for a while now I have been keeping note of words that should have a better description in the dictionary. I won’t mention which dictionaries did this as it is from multiple sources, but tell me if it is just my imagination or is there something wrong with these definitions?

ABORTION: The act of aborting.
ABORT: To undergo an abortion.
DISREGARD: The action of disregarding.

     I am not a dictionary writer, an expert in English, or a professional teacher and even I can see there is something lacking in these definitions. If you were unable to speak the English language or if you didn’t already know the meanings of these words, do you think these are adequate definitions? I would like to know who it is that makes these definitions. However, the next example is even better. Let’s assume that you don’t know the English language at all and you are learning it for the first time. You do not know the meaning to the following words: aversion, antipathy, or repugnance. Now, we know they have similar meanings, but assume you don’t know their meanings at all. This is what I found in a certain dictionary:

AVERSION: Repugnance or antipathy.
ANTIPATHY: Habitual repugnance; aversion.
REPUGNANCE: The state of being repugnant.

     Does that define it for you? You should have a complete understanding of their meanings now. I haven’t seen such terrible definitions in dictionaries before. And these last three definitions are from an American dictionary. What is happening to our language? Are we really unable to define our own words? I wish the definition writers would stop to think how a foreign person will view or understand these definitions. Or what about an American child who is trying to learn these new words for the first time? How can someone learn the meanings of words with definitions like these? This seems so absurd!