Super produccion,Ambientada en el ambiente duro de la policia de Miami, asi como la DEA, capos, contrabando de droga etc, junto a los actores Will Smith, Martin Lawrence como agentes de la policia de Miami, asi como hector “Jonhy”Tapia como el capo cubano ,la mejor pelicula que he visto, realizada en el año 2003, ya algo antigua pero buena, dura como 2 horas y media ,espectaculares efectos especiales, carros de lujo, etc y el Soundtrack “Shake Ya Tailfeather “ con los raperos Nelly feat. , P. Diddy & Murphy Lee

Okay as you guys know I am half gay. I like chicks, just not on regular basis.  I don’t spend my days thinking about women and no women barely turn me on. But when I am on, I am on. So as I was sitting here thinking I came up with this. What we would it be like to bang……

Megan Fox

Maybe its the eyes, the tats, whatever it is she is hot.. At least to me. She looks like she has been with a couple of chicks. Just sayin…

Nicole Narain

Sexy. I remember seeing her in a Fabolous video a couple years back. Real cutie.

Kim Kardashian

We have all seen the sex tape with Ray-J. I cant lie it was hot. I normally don’t like chics with big butts, but Kimmy gets a pass.

Next…

Meagan Good

This is like ole faithful. She still got it. She stands the test of time through all the new chics. Those lips. (Sorry really gay moment)

Last but not least…

Gabrielle Union

I remember  Nicole and I were watching Bad Boys 2 and we couldn’t decide who to look at Will Smith or Gabby. Very sexy.

That concludes the list. Just a little insight into the women that peak my interest and make me feel like more of a full time lesbian than an occasional one.

Check out the trailer here.

This film almost made me reconsider my love for Team America: World Police. There are no lengthy musical numbers to speak of, nor are there any wooden puppets (with the exception of Dennis Quaid), but the premises feel very much the same. IN THE VERY NEAR FUTURE, an uber-patriotic team of American heroes (well, they’re actually a multi-national NATO force based under the sands of the Sahara, but who’s counting) utilize high-tech weapons and a complete disregard for national sovereignty to fight the forces of evil. In this case, the forces of evil include a rogue weapons manufacturer with a plot to “steal” some high-tech nanobot warheads – which he also manufactured – and use them to destroy three major cities, which will allow him to take over the world. Somehow.

Why he can’t skip the pretense of stealing the warheads is unclear, since he does have an underwater base and an entire army of fearless, mind-controlled super-soldiers at his disposal – a base which, according to the Joes, is “the perfect location – difficult to locate, and easily defensible”, and yet becomes the perfect deathtrap as soon as someone cracks one of the windows. What it becomes is a climactic set-piece for an underwater version of a Star Wars battle, and the result is cheesy, but satisfying.

Conversely, the Joes’ base was one of the worst setpieces in the film. At no point does the base feel like it could be a real place on this planet. It makes Team America flying out of Mt. Rushmore seem plausible. The CG design of this place was laughable, and indeed, a lot of complaints have been made about the “bad CG” in this film.

But I must speak to one sequence of “bad CG”, in which the two lead Joes (played with great gusto by Channing Tatum and Marlon Wayans) don “Delta-6 Accelerator Suits,” which allow them to run and jump at superhuman strength and speed through the streets of Paris. The movement of these entirely CG characters does indeed look cheesy and artificial, but I must question whether any such CG could ever truly look realistic. Even the best uses of CG involving humans will inevitably break the illusion as soon as the characters engage in impossible stunts. And while this particular sequence could certainly have looked better, I don’t think it could possibly have looked real.

They’re chasing a Humvee with a spiked snowplow on its front – a vehicle with the uncanny ability to hurtle skyward any car that it smashes through. It’s as if Stephen Sommers’ saw the legendary car-tossing sequence from Bad Boys 2, and thought to himself, “Needs more cars.” The sequence is absurd, plays freely with the laws of physics, but is nonetheless quite fun. The only drawback was the complete lack of tension over whether or not the Eiffel Tower would be destroyed, thanks to the film’s trailer. The only real surprise is the sheer amount of collateral damage inflicted upon the population of Paris by both sides in the process.

I won’t speak too much about the acting, since the only actor that seems to be straining his craft is Channing Tatum… Dennis Quaid swaggers maniacally as General Hawk, with a voice somewhere between John Wayne and George C. Scott. Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje (“Lost”, “Oz”) reverts to his native, but nonetheless uncharacteristic British accent, and Jonathan Pryce dons a half-assed American accent as the completely useless American President. I was pleased to see the return of Brandon Soo Hoo (Tropic Thunder) for one of the film’s many brazen flashback sequences (in a scene that was shockingly brutal and effective for one involving child actors).

I’ll say very little about Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s character, except that I thoroughly enjoyed his performance, and his comical (and digitally-enhanced) voice reminded me a great deal of gay porn star Brandon St. Randy* (Justin Long) from Kevin Smith’s Zack and Miri Make a Porno (clip is likely NSFW, due to language and brief Seth Rogen ass):

*An observation I first heard from IFC.com’s Matt Singer on a recent episode of the /Filmcast, but the resemblance of the voices was uncanny nonetheless.

Laremy Legel of Film.com, in a recent article, makes a pretty convincing case against lowering one’s expectations for any film. The point applies quite broadly, but really didn’t apply to this film for me. G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra delivered on most of my expectations, and to say that I lowered them would be an oversimplification.

I’ve had a great affection for director Stephen Sommers ever since the Mummy films. He’s an earnest Michael Bay – a purveyor of CG diarrhea who seems to genuinely believe that he’s creating artful cinema, and the results are generally pretty satisfying. And despite my nitpicks about this film (of which there were many more than I included in this review), I actually had a very good time with it.

FilmWonk rating: 6.5 out of 10

Check out the trailer here.

IN THE VERY NEAR FUTURE, the top spectator sport in the country is “Slayers”, a first-person shooter in which gamers take mental control of a real human being in full-scale combat. The top competitor in this game is Kable (Gerard Butler), who is controlled by Simon (Logan Lerman), an overprivileged teenager. From the trailer, this film looked like a second-rate knockoff of a third-rate remake, Paul W.S. Anderson’s Death Race, and indeed, the backdrops are very similar. In both films, the participants are ostensibly volunteers – death row inmates (of which there seems to be an ample supply) playing in exchange for a slim chance of freedom. And in both films, society revels in the violence inflicted by the inmates upon each other.

Unlike in Death Race, the viewers aren’t just casual observers of a gladiator-like spectacle; they’re active participants. In addition to “Slayers”, there is a game called “Society”, an X-rated mind-control version of “The Sims”, in which blubbery leviathans take control of attractive people and force them to engage in every kind of debauchery. While the gamers who play “Slayers” use full-body controls and appear to be in good shape, we are shown a typical “Society” player who is depicted, to put it mildly, as a fat, self-deluding, sexually deviant waste of life.

I probably wouldn’t have bothered with this film, if not for the fact that it is written and directed by Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor, the same team of manic guerilla filmmakers behind the thoroughly entertaining Crank series. Neveldine and Taylor bring their usual frantic handheld style to this film, along with their particular flavor of over-the-top action.

But unlike in the Crank series, this film starts out taking itself completely seriously. And the result is a rather boring first half. The gaming sequences, which make up the majority of the first hour, exist in the same generic grey/brown ruined city and shaky-cam style that all boilerplate first-person shooters include at some point. These sequences are jarring, frenetic, and subject to constant interruption by fake static and video cutting out, which made them almost impossible to comprehend.

Nonetheless, there’s still some pretty compelling imagery in the first act. The prison where these men are held (when they’re not playing) appears to be set down inside a canyon, and is shot in such a way that the desaturated blue sky feels huge and all-encompassing. The resulting setpiece feels bizarre and otherworldly – an almost Limbo-like place for these men to await their doom.

The film really hits its stride in the third act, when we’re subjected to the most hilarious scenery-chewing from the Southern dulcet tones of Michael C. Hall (“Dexter”) as Ken Castle, the inventor of “Slayers” and “Society”. Castle is basically Dr. Evil – a parody of a James Bond villain, and Hall is immensely fun to watch in this role.

This film’s most significant improvement over Death Race is that it effectively depicts just how backward, complacent, and violent a society would have to be in order to support this kind of system. And this may also be its most significant disadvantage. Gerard Butler plays his part completely straight, given that Kable has real stakes (wife and child), but the film just doesn’t make enough sense to be taken seriously. And while the ending is immensely satisfying, I can scarcely say the journey was worth it.

FilmWonk rating: 5 out of 10

(This is an old post, and a goodie.)

Armageddon. Pearl Harbor. Bad Boys. These movies have six things in common: bombastic action, ham-fisted acting, dumb explosions, ADD-like editing, unnecessary romance and Michael Bay. The cinematic auteur/Helen Keller of the movie industry, Michael Bay has managed to make a career out of catering to the lowest of the lowest common denominator–making popcorn flicks that are jam-packed with empty calories and brain cancer. (He centered Pearl Harbor, a movie about the BOMBING of Pearl Harbor, around a love triangle!) If any director is proof of making a deal with the Devil, it’s this dude.

A picture is worth a thousand words.

So it was no surprise that his work needed to be celebrated–any be celebrate, I mean mock openly and cruelly. Picking two bad Michael Bay movies was like picking which Wayans Bros. movie was not an NAACP violation. We ended up settling on The Island, a futuristic, high-concept/low-executed action flick, and Bad Boys II, a present-based, low-concept/lower-executed exercise in self-hatred. We didn’t even make it an hour into Bad Boys II, which says a lot about the quality and time length of this shit. (2+ hours for each movie? 2.5 hours for Bad Boys II?!?!?)

"Plan Your Escape... from the theater."

We started with The Island, which for most directors would be the black mark on their resume; for Michael Bay, it will be his magnum opus. The setting is a futuristic world where rich humans clone themselves for spare organs and parts. (If I spolied it for you, be thankful that you don’t have to see it.) The “insurance policy” clones live in an underground Arizona facility (yay?), cut off from the human world. The “Island” appears to be the nirvana the innocent, simple-minded clones are waiting for, with one person “picked” to leave the facility for an exotic giveaway; in actuality, it was their call-up to serve their function as organ/baby/limb generators. Lincoln Six Echo (Ewan McGregor) learns the secret of The Island and the trappings of the underground area, freeing Jordan Two Delta (Scarlett Johansson) and discovering the truth–complete with dumb explosions. ham-fisted acting and bombastic action sequences in the process.

"We're in WHAT movie?!"

So what is bad about this, you ask? Good question, as it sounds pretty interesting. In reality, it’s far from it. While the movie sounds like the Blade Runner/Logan’s Run action-thriller that would have been nice, it was just another dumb Michael Bay movie. Bombastic action: check; That ham-fisted acting: check (particularly the overacting of Michael Clarke Duncan and the blank-slate blahness of Johansson); Dumb explosions: brain-rotting check; ADD-like editing: check (following this movie was like playing Pong on crack); Unnecessary romance: check (formulating a romance in a futuristic action-thriller is like the chocolate chips in a pancake-coated sausage-on-a-stick: superfluous, silly and stupid).

Ewan McGregor and Scarlett Johansson's romance in The Island.

And the two biggest crimes were that this shit went on for more than 2 hours, and that Johansson was refused the opportunity to do a nude scene. (In an industry like Hollywood that expects actresses to go in the buff to either lend a movie artistic credibility or save a B/C-grade pile of dreck, Michael Bay insisted Scarlett not take the naked walk–once again showing he has no idea what to do with a movie.) By the time the credits rolled, I felt robbed of a lot of things, and while it sounds like I’m being pervy by going on about Scarlett’s lack of skin, it would have made a horrible movie merely mediocre.

Speaking of horrible, we then watched Bad Boys II.

Look at the flames! Flames mean AWESOME!

Oh lord, this movie was bad. Because the world banged down Michael Bay and Jerry Bruckheimer’s door for a sequel to the Shakespearean drama known as Bad Boys, we were shoveled this crap followup. Set several years after the first action-comedy buddy romp, we are thrust into a Miami ecstasy drug ring, and only our two joke-cracking wiseguy cop heroes (Will Smith as Mike Lowrey, Martin Lawrence as Marcus Burnett) can save the day!

"We're in WHAT movie?!"

Because we only made it through one hour of the 147-minute runtime (that’s 2.5 hours for you math-challenged folks), there’s not much to comment on. However, there was more than enough to hate. (And we missed the destructive car chase in Cuba, plowing through poor shanty-like homes like playing cards, as well as numerous N-word bombs.) Bombastic action: check (over-the-top violence and destruction); That hamfisted acting: CHECK (lots of yelling and mugging by both Lawrence and Smith; histronic cookie-cutter police chief Joe Pantoliano); Dumb explosions: check and check; ADD-like editing: check (I swear that I went cross-eyed at one point); Unnecessary romance: check. (Lowrey carries on a secret romance with Syd, played by Gabrielle Union, who is the sister of Burnett and is also an undercover cop. WHAT?!?)

Had we finished this epic crassness of a movie, there would be more to complain about. Perhaps that was for the best. Since we didn’t, here’s another AWESOME poster:

The flames! The explosions! The moistness!

This was the first time we were not able to fully complete a Bad Movie Night. I think that warrants a future Michael Bay Bad Movie Night to polish off the dirty deeds of the first. It should be fun… and awful.

Ecco gli ascolti, basati sui dati forniti quotidianamente da Auditel, dei programmi di prima serata di ieri 22 maggio 2009, e a seguire una guida completa a cosa potremo vedere questa sera sui principali canali TV italiani in chiaro e a pagamento.
Per maggiori informazioni sulla programmazione televisiva visitate le sezioni Telefilm News, Cartoon News, Sat News e Dig News, per esprimere la vostra opinione utilizzate la sezione settimanale TelePagelle.

VENERDI’ 22 MAGGIO 2009

BILANCIO DELLA SERATA: la terza puntata del gioco di RaiUno “Affari tuoi – Speciale per due” con Max Giusti ha mantenuti gli elevati ascolti delle scorse settimane, superando un po’ a sorpresa l’episodio inedito della serie italiana “I Cesaroni” con Claudio Amendola messo in campo da Canale 5. Gli episodi inediti della serie ospedaliera di RaiDue “E.R. – Medici in prima linea” rimangono leggermente sopra i due milioni, superando tutte le proposte delle altre reti Rai e Mediaset, che comprendevano le repliche dei film “Bad Boys 2″ con Will Smith e “La figlia del generale” con John Travolta, e il programma “Mi manda RaiTre” con Andrea Vianello; infine, il programma settimanale di La 7 “Tetris” con Luca Telese (con 795.000 spettatori ed il 3,81% di share).

LE FASCE DI PRIMA SERATA (ore 20.30/22.30)

	Pubblico	Share %
	6.220.000	26,51
	1.952.000	8,32
	1.838.000	7,83
	201.000	0,86
	10.211.000	43,52
	5.988.000	25,52
	1.680.000	7,16
	1.825.000	7,78
	85.000	0,36
	9.579.000	40,82
	750.000	3,20
Altri canali terrestri	1.287.000	5,48
Canali satellitari	1.638.000	6,98
TOTALE	23.464.000	100,00

A seguire alcune segnalazioni sugli ascolti disponibili di prima serata, e per concludere una guida alla TV di questa sera.

IERI SERA IN TV…

• Alle 21.14 la terza puntata del gioco “Affari tuoi – Speciale per due” (6.971.000 spettatori – 28,65%, preceduto alle 20.41 da “Affari tuoi – La scelta” con 5.417.000 spettatori – 24,68%).
• Alle 21.02 gli episodi 14-15 “Piccole e grandi storie” della quindicesima ed ultima stagione inedita della serie ospedaliera E.R. – Medici in prima linea, con 2.001.000 spettatori (8,22%). Alle 23.09 il programma “L’era glaciale” (1.029.000 spettatori – 12,22%).
• Alle 20.37 il 2.809° episodio della soap italiana “Un posto al sole” (2.468.000 spettatori). Alle 21.10 la ventinovesima puntata del programma “Mi manda RaiTre” (1.864.000 spettatori – 8,19%).
• Alle 20.47 il varietà “Striscia la notizia” (6.375.000 spettatori – 28,35%). Alle 21.24 l’episodio 27 “Foto di famiglia” della terza stagione inedita della serie italiana “I Cesaroni”, con 6.318.000 spettatori (25,54%). Alle 22.29 la seconda parte della terza puntata “Quella notte a Fregene” della miniserie “Piper”, con 3.546.000 spettatori (19,66%).
• Alle 20.28 il gioco “La ruota della fortuna” (1.487.000 spettatori). Alle 21.12 il film d’azione “Bad Boys 2” (1.930.000 spettatori – 9,52%).
• Alle 19.43 la soap tedesca “Tempesta d’amore” (1.615.000 spettatori). Alle 20.29 l’episodio 1 “La vendetta dei McLains” della sesta stagione del telefilm Walker, Texas Ranger, con 1.961.000 spettatori. Alle 21.14 il film thriller “La figlia del generale” (1.913.000 spettatori – 8,75%).

SABATO 23 MAGGIO 2009

Sono elencati principalmente i programmi di prima serata. Gli orari e i programmi indicati possono variare senza preavviso.

CANALI IN CHIARO

• Alle 21.10 il varietà musicale “Ti lascio una canzone” con Antonella Clerici – puntata 8.
• Alle 21.05 la serie poliziesca Cold Case – Delitti irrisolti con Kathryn Morris e Danny Pino – episodi 5×03-04.
• Alle 20.10 il programma “Che tempo che fa” con Fabio Fazio, Filippa Lagerback, Antonio Cornacchione – ospiti Cherie Blair, Orietta Berti, Flavio Caroli. Alle 21.30 il programma documentaristico “Ulisse – Il piacere della scoperta” con Alberto Angela – puntata 12. Alle 23.40 il programma “Amore criminale” con Camila Raznovich – puntata 8.
• Alle 21.10 il film thriller “Il Codice Da Vinci” (2006), con Tom Hanks e Audrey Tautou.
• Alle 21.10 il film commedia “La tela di Carlotta” (2006), con Dakota Fanning.
• Alle 21.10 il film commedia “Bomber” (1982), con Bud Spencer e Jerry Calà. Alle 23.10 la serie poliziesca Law & Order: Unità speciale con Christopher Meloni e Mariska Hargitay – episodi 9×01 e 7×15.
• Alle 21.10 il film western “I Magnifici Sette cavalcano ancora” (1972), con Lee Van Cleef.
• Alle 21.00 il varietà comico “Central Station” con Omar Fantini.
• Alle 21.00 il programma musicale “Classifica Album”.
• Alle 20.30 il programma sportivo “Diretta Stadio… Ed è subito goal!”.
• Alle 21.15 il programma “Shuttle” con Giovanni Mucci.

SUL DIGITALE TERRESTRE:

• Alle 21.10 la serie cinese The Legend of Bruce Lee con Chan Kwok-kwan – episodi 15-16. Alle 22.50 il documentario “L’urlo di Chen terrorizza ancora l’Occidente” - puntata 8. Alle 23.05 il film TV thriller “44 Minutes: The North Hollywood Shoot-Out” (2003), con Michael Madsen e Ron Livingston.
• Alle 21.00 il film commedia “La poliziotta fa carriera” (1976), con Edwige Fenech. Alle 22.30 il programma “Io mi racconto: Lina Wertmuller”. Alle 23.20 il film commedia “La dottoressa del distretto militare” (1976), con Edwige Fenech.
• Alle 21.00 il varietà “Wannadance 3”. Alle 21.30 la sit-com Kirk con Kirk Cameron.
• Alle 21.00 la serie animata “La principessa Sissi”. Alle 21.25 la serie animata “Jolanda la figlia del Corsaro Nero”.
• Alle 21.00 la replica del programma “TV Talk” con Massimo Bernardini.
• Alle 21.10 lo sceneggiato “Primo cittadino” (1997), con Tullio Solenghi e Giulia Boschi – puntata 3.

CANALI A PAGAMENTO

Nell’elenco non considero i vari canali “+ 1″ disponibili ed i canali trasmessi in alta definizione.

DIGITALE TERRESTRE

• Alle 21.00 il film drammatico “Mio fratello è figlio unico” (2006), con Elio Germano e Riccardo Scamarcio.
• Alle 21.00 il film commedia “I Muppets alla conquista di Broadway” (1984), con Juliana Donald e Lonny Price.
• Alle 21.00 il film d’avventura “Space Cowboys” (2000), con Clint Eastwood.
• Alle 21.00 la serie poliziesca Canterbury’s Law con Julianna Margulies – episodio 2. Alle 21.45 la serie Saving Grace con Holly Hunter – episodio 2×11.
• Alle 21.00 la serie Fringe con Anna Torv e Joshua Jackson – episodio 1×17. Alle 21.50 la serie di fantascienza Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles con Lena Headey e Thomas Dekker – episodio  2×16.
• Alle 21.10 la serie animata “Diabolik” – tre episodi. Alle 22.25 la serie animata “Hunter X Hunter” – tre episodi.
• Alle 21.00 la replica dell’incontro di calcio Inter – Siena di Serie A.

DIGITALE TERRESTRE

• Alle 20.45 l’incontro di calcio Mechelen – Genk valido per la finale della Coppa del Belgio.
• Alle 21.00 il programma sportivo “Sport Unlimited” – puntata 12. Alle 22.00 il programma sportivo “Tony Hawks Gigantic Skate Park Tour” – puntata 3.

DIGITALE SATELLITARE

INTRATTENIMENTO:

• Alle 21.15 il varietà “Fiorello Show” con Fiorello – puntata 21. Alle 21.50 il talent show “America’s Got Talent” - puntata 2×08.
• Alle 21.00 la serie Dr. House – Medical Division con Hugh Laurie – episodi 2×12-13. Alle 22.40 la serie Lost con Matthew Fox e Michael Emerson – episodio 5×07.
• Alle 20.30 la serie poliziesca Bones con Emily Deschanel e David Boreanaz – episodi 2×02-03. Alle 22.20 la sit-com Samantha chi? con Christina Applegate e Jean Smart – episodi 2×05-06.
• Alle 21.00 il legal drama Avvocati a New York con Mark Paul Gosselaar – episodio 1×10. Alle 21.55 la serie poliziesca C.S.I.: Scena del crimine con William Petersen e Marg Helgenberger – episodio 9×11.
• Alle 21.00 il varietà comico “Colorado Cafè”.
• Alle 21.00 il programma “Chef per un giorno”.
• Alle 21.00 la serie d’azione Codice Matrix con James Denton e Kelly Rutherford – episodi conclusivi 15-16.
• Alle 21.00 la serie poliziesca australiana The Strip con Aaron Jeffery e Vanessa Gray – episodio 5. Alle 21.55 il film d’azione “Delta Force” (1986), con Chuck Norris..
• Alle 21.00 la replica della puntata di ieri sera del programma “L’era glaciale” con Daria Bignardi.
• Alle 21.00 il film TV drammatico “Giuseppe Moscati – L’amore che guarisce” (2007), con Giuseppe Fiorello e Kasia Smutniak – prima e seconda parte.
• Alle 21.00 la replica del “TG5″ delle ore 20.00. Alle 21.30 il film TV commedia “Un amore di strega” (2008), con Alessia Marcuzzi e Pietro Sermonti.
• Alle 21.00 il programma “Hip Hop Girls” – puntate “Le regole del gioco” e “Voci che corrono”.
• Alle 21.00 il film drammatico “Agatha Christie” (1979), con Vanessa Redgrave e Dustin Hoffman.
• Alle 21.00 la serie familiare Settimo cielo con Stephen Collins e Catherine Hicks – episodi 11×03-04.
• Alle 20.50 il documentario “Addio Sicilia”. Alle 21.50 il documentario “Mafia Top Secret”. Alle 22.10 il documentario “Licenza di uccidere”.
• Alle 21.00 il film commedia “Giulietta degli spiriti” (1965), con Giulietta Masina e Valentina Cortese.
• Alle 21.05 la serie Il Corvo con Mark Dacascos e Marc Gomes – episodio 19. Alle 22.00 il film drammatico “La spia che vide il suo cadavere” (1972), con George Peppard.
• Alle 20.15 la sit-com inglese The Vicar of Dibley con Dawn French – due episodi. Alle 21.35 la sit-com inglese Ideal con Johnny Vegas – episodio 3. Alle 22.05 la sit-com inglese Thieves Like Us con Tom Brooke – episodio 3.
• Alle 21.00 il varietà “Due sul divano” - puntate 5-6.
• Alle 20.50 il varietà “Guinness World Records Spagna”. Alle 21.40 il varietà “Guinness World Records Australia”.
• Alle 21.00 la serie animata “Samurai 7” – tre episodi. Alle 22.30 la serie animata “Yattaman” – tre episodi.

SPORT:

• Alle 20.45 l’incontro di calcio Villareal – Valencia valido per la 37ª giornata della Liga spagnola.

CINEMA:

• Alle 21.00 il film commedia “Juno” (2007), con Ellen Page e Michael Cera.
• Alle 21.00 il film TV commedia “Una reginetta molto speciale” (2008), con Nikki Blonsky.
• Alle 21.00 il film commedia “Avventura nello spazio” (2001), con James Woods.
• Alle 21.15 il film thriller “Minuti contati” (1955), con Johnny Depp
• Alle 21.00 il film TV di fantascienza “Post Impact – Il giorno dopo” (2004), con Dean Cain e Bettina Zimmermann.
• Alle 21.00 il film drammatico “Il padrino – Parte II” (1974), con Al Pacino e Robert De Niro.
• Alle 21.00 il film commedia “Veneri al sole” (1965), con Franco Franchi e Ciccio Ingrassia.
• Alle 21.00 il film poliziesco “Il colpo sulla metropolitana” (1998), con Edward James Olmos e Vincent D’Onofrio.
• Alle 21.00 il film poliziesco “Bulletproof” (1996), con Adam Sandler e Damon Wayans.

DOCUMENTARI:

• Alle 21.00 il programma “My Shocking Story” – puntata “L’uomo senza volto”. Alle 22.00 il documentario “Gemelli siamesi”.
• Alle 21.00 il programma “Megastrutture giganti” – puntata “Portaerei”. Alle 22.00 il documentario “Corvette”.
• Alle 21.00 il programma “Roma: il trionfo e la caduta” – puntata 3 “Giulio Cesare”. Alle 22.00 il documentario “La Bibbia segreta” - puntata 3 “Chi erano i discepoli di Gesù?”.
• Alle 21.00 il programma “Le avventure di Austin Stevens” - puntata “Il pitone gigante: il grande invasore”.
• Alle 21.05 il programma “Mega World” – puntata “Dubai”.

RAGAZZI:
(i canali Disney Channel, Playhouse Disney e Cartoon Network sono anche ricevibili sul digitale terrestre all’interno del bouquet pay Mediaset Premium Fantasy)

• Alle 20.55 la serie animata “L’incantevole Creamy” – due episodi. Alle 21.45 la serie animata “Piccole donne”.
• Alle 21.00 la serie Drake & Josh con Drake Bell. Alle 21.30 la serie Ned – Scuola di sopravvivenza con Devon Werkheiser.
• Alle 21.10 la serie animata “Scooby Doo”. Alle 21.30 la serie animata “Le nuove avventure di Scooby Doo”. Alle 21.55 la serie animata “Star Wars – The Clone Wars”.
• Alle 21.00 la serie animata “Tom & Jerry”. Alle 21.35 la serie animata “Popeye – Braccio di Ferro”.
• Alle 20.50 la serie musicale inglese Britannia High con Mitch Hewer e Rana Roy. Alle 21.35 la serie animata italiana “Winx Club” – episodio 3×11.
• Alle 21.00 la serie animata “La canzone della buonanotte”. Alle 21.10 la serie animata “I fratelli Koala”. Alle 21.25 la serie animata “I Numerotti”.
• Alle 20.55 il film TV commedia “Alieni in famiglia” (2000), con T. Hope e C. Draper.
• Alle 21.00 la serie animata “Le nuove avventure di Winnie the Pooh”. Alle 21.25 la serie animata “Minuscule”. Alle 21.30 la serie animata “Monster Allergy”.
• Alle 20.55 la serie animata “Yin Yang Yo” – due episodi. Alle 21.50 il telefilm Piccoli brividi. Alle 22.15 la serie animata “Shaman King”.
• Alle 21.15 la serie australiana The Sleepover Club. Alle 21.40 la serie animata “I Famosi 5”.

= film, serie o fiction in prima visione sui canali non a pagamento, o al primo passaggio sui canali Sky.
= film o film TV.
= telefilm (serie/sit-com) straniero o cartone animato [l'indicazione tipo "3x01" segnala il primo episodio della terza stagione].
= fiction di produzione italiana o straniera.
= soap opera italiana o straniera.
= programma sportivo.

I want to be a mechanic like Megan Fox in Transformers.

That's totes how you look under the hood of a car

No one will really care that I don’t actually know how to fix anything as long as I do stuff like this:

I love getting my hands dirty

Yeeeeeeeeeeeah.

In “Revenge,” you flee evil Decepticons for just about the entire movie. At least your male co-stars hauled butt in comfy sneakers — you were in heels!
Megan: Stilettos — and for the last part of the film, motorcycle boots. I had major shinsplints and threw out my back a couple times. Beyond that, Michael likes everyone freakishly tan, so we were painted maroon, like in the old Westerns when they hired Caucasians to play Native Americans. I had on fake eyelashes, running through the desert with sand stuck in them, and I’m sweating off all the makeup. It looked like we were making a tragedy.

For serious???!!! Is that supposed to be a funny anecdote? Because it sounds like a nightmare. But this is just accepted as part of the “Michael Bay experience”. Haha, you know how Bay is! Good times… Argh! I thought she looked dirty in the first film. WTF? So many, many shades of lame.

Here’s an interview with Gabrielle Union re: Bad Boys 2:

UGO:: In that one scene with your wire on that tiny dress – how did that work?

GU: You know, that wire also functioned as my mic for the scene, so it had to work, and we had to make that work. It was very tricky, I will say. Where the pack was…was not the most comfortable of places. You can use your imagination on that one.

UGO:: How are you able to wear those heels?

GU: The Jimmy Choos? They had to go. They cut out this scene where once they save me at the mansion, I have to sprint down the steps, sprint outside, we are running through the thing, jumping into the lagoon, and I am dipping in the grass. They are like, “OK, you look ridiculous.” We had to add this little shot where you see me throwing off my shoes to make it a little more believable, because I was falling down the steps. I was just watching behind-the-scenes footage of the day that we blew up the house, and I’m running down the steps, and you see me falling the whole way down. I don’t know how they cut that together but I was falling the whole way down the steps. It was terrible. Jimmy Choos are made to prance in, not do action movies.

YA THINK???!!!

I hate you Michael Bay.

HAVANA – A push in Congress to do away with U.S. travel bans on Cuba could set off a flood of American visitors to the long-forbidden island.

Whose seen Bad Boys 2? That’s exactly what Cuba is like! I’m trying to go to Cuba son! Who’s down? Joe’s sailing (put that civic up on cragislist).

Shit’s gonna be just like that, something to remember.

Calz1.

There’s a lot of ridiculous junk out there in the wide world and more often than not, it all comes down to a single naive, oaf of a person. But when the ridiculous junk comes from an Organisation with morals that are pure; I can’t think properly, I’m sorry. It’s been so hot here in New Zealand these past couple of days. I can’t sleep, eating is a chore, any type of sexual activity is just awkward, and trying to empathize with “People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals“ seems pointless and is doing me-ed-in!

 PETA dresses in KKK garb outside Westminster Dog Show

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals knows how to grab attention. And show off its laundry.

The animal rights group, which every year stages a protest at the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show, had two of its members dress in Ku Klux Klan garb outside Madison Square Garden on Monday.

Their goal, according to a post on the PETA website, was to draw a parallel between the KKK and the American Kennel Club. “Obviously it’s an uncomfortable comparison,” PETA spokesman Michael McGraw told the Associated Press.

But the AKC is trying to create a “master race” when it comes to pure-bred dogs, he added. “It’s a very apt comparison.”

The group passed out brochures implying the Klan and AKC have the goal of “pure bloodlines” in common.

“I can’t speak for everyone, but the vast majority of the people exhibiting and handling and showing at Westminster are more interested in the health of dogs than anything else,” Westminster spokesman David Frei told the AP.

“We want to produce the next generation of healthy and happy dogs,” he said, “not just for the show ring but for the couches at home.”

Bystander Fatima Walden told the AP the KKK imagery was inappropriate no matter what the message. [I second that]

“They could have used something else as an example,” she said. “You should be considerate to everybody.”

Other than a shouting match during the hour-long protest, police said the scene remained calm.

[side note] I think every blogger should post at least one story about PETA.
It’s just so damn fun.

Here are some more, err, umm, protests/ridiculous junk:

NBC notified Peta that their 2009 Superbowl Commercial ‘depicts a level of sexuality exceeding NBC’standards …Shame.

Change The Way You Make
Ice Cream

The animal rights group “Peta” sent the Vermont based ice cream company a letter asking it to start using human breast milk instead of cow’s milk.

PETA says cow’s milk has been linked to juvenile diabetes, allergies, constipation, obesity, and prostate and ovarian cancer.

Ben & Jerry’s responded saying…

“We applaud PETA’s novel approach to bringing attention to an issue, but we believe a mother’s milk is best used for her child.”

A woman, clothed only in a bikini, mouse ears and a tail, laid in the grass on the side of the road in a simulated glue trap.

PETA said it is targeting Lowe’s because while other retailers, such as Walgreen’s, CVS, Rite Aid, Albertsons, and Safeway have pulled glue traps from their inventory—Lowe’s continues to sell them.

So, why does PETA have a problem with glue traps?

“They ensnare any small animal that crosses their path. They are absolutely indiscriminate, so mice, birds, even kittens have been caught on these. They struggle to free themselves for days until they finally starve to death,” said PETA spokesperson Cassandra Curbelo.

PETA’s beef [pun intended] with M&M’s is actually with Mars Candy Company, who owns the brand. According to PETA, Mars is funding animal testing and research in order to improve their products.

“By exposing myself, I hope to expose others to the many benefits of a vegetarian diet”, says Bingham [Pfft]

Here’s an awesome counter advert by another organization that feels PETA objectifies and exploits women:

 And tell me this isn’t a paradoxical advert:

So what have we all learned - Well, PETA thinks Animal Rights appeals to emotional women which is why they think it takes half naked women to get people to even think about it? You know what, I’m a good person, so EFF PETA! EFF PETA IN THEIR WELL ROUNDED BUTTS!

I mean it seems they like to contradict their cause with obscene nonsense, the sad part being is that they’re consistent. I’m all for love and harmony and stroking things, but regardless of the 2 million+ supporters; selling sex and the female body as a first priority is utterly weak.

Behind their cause, or rather, behind the softcore porn; this organisation runs on cheap publicity and sexploitation.

I think PETA should undergo new management
…or just start making porno already jeez.

I sent a complaint to the broadcasting committee over Michael Bay’s actioner BadBoys2 on the 24th September:

20 Minutes into the screening of “Bad Boys 2″ last night, the word “Fuck” was censored (understandable) but not the word “Nigger”

Personally I’m not a huge fan of Director Michael Bay nor am I big on cliché Hollywood action dialogue; but your broadcast movie censorship of “Bad Boys 2″ last night was a double standard. “Fuck” and “Nigger” are both offensive terms and the fact that one word was censored over the other upset me, regardless of their use in context.

Here’s what they said Today:
The TVNZ Appraiser who viewed the movie and made these cuts, also made the decision to leave the word nigger in the broadcast. She considered that the use of the word nigger was in context for the scene involving members of the Ku Klux Klan assaulting the black policeman and that to cut the word nigger would have rendered the exchange nonsensical.

So they felt it exemplified the KKK huh?
“Nonsensical” A better decision would have been to play a better movie.

They declined to uphold my complaint.
Fair enough, can’t say I was all too anal about it in the first place.

Michael Bay is still a douche… Hurry up with Transformers 2 already!

Hollywood cranks out products like Sex and the City, Hitch, and Gossip Girls that show the characters living fantastic lives that are completely divorced from economic reality. There’s no way Carrie Bradshaw, to name one example, could live in a lavish Manhattan apartment on the salary of a single weekly column. And while it’s easy to dismiss such criticism as “it’s only a movie,” the lifestyle portrayed in these films – filled with amazing real estate and perfect fashion – buttressed by fiendishly clever product placement — is completely aspirational. Viewers are implicitly told that not only they should strive to buy into this lifestyle, but that they deserve this lifestyle. Is it any wonder why the middle class have bankrupted itself to buy a plasma screen TVs, McMansions, and gargantuan SUVs? The road to middle-class respectability is now found through buying things that are beyond the means of most in the middle class.

More unsettling is the action spectacular where this same sense of entitlement pervades. Instead of getting a thrill of vicariously consuming, movies like Wanted, Déjà Vu, and Bad Boys 2 are all about the vicarious thrill of wasting things (and people). Because Will Smith is chasing the baddies, he is entitled to trash city centers, torture people, and destroy impoverished third-world shantytowns with a Hummer (if you can think of a better metaphor for the Bush administration, tell me). Both trends represent the worst stereotypes of Americans – thoughtlessly wasteful, thoughtlessly violent, shallow, and spoiled.

There is a counter-current roiling against this trend. Movies like Children of Men*, Idiocracy, Wall-E and books like The Road and Parable of the Sower detail the aftermath of pursuing this American dream. The environment is wrecked beyond repair. The underpinnings of civilization are atrophying away. And in some cases, the fate of humanity itself is in question. The delirious party of waste and consumption is long gone and those remaining have clean up the mess.

All of these works are in the sci-fi genre, but there’s one work more that I’d include that shares these elements. The Wire, hailed as the best show ever on TV, is sprawling narrative about a city, Baltimore, struggling under the weight of failing schools, funding cuts from the government, and rising crime. The show very vividly and very accurately details a dystopic world where the underpinnings of civilization have atrophied away and where every day citizens are forced to live in a world of random violence, police brutality and utter hopelessness. A less exaggerated version of the world found in Parable of the Sower, The Road, and Children of Men. It’s a far cry from the luxury of a world like Sex and the City, yet it exists right along side of it. The underclass neighbors are its shadow. This isn’t necessarily a cheap Marxist screed against class, either. We as Americans chose to create this world. By picking leaders who favored tax cuts for the rich, cutting benefits on the poor, the corporatization of government, and an outsourcing of blue-collar jobs, we, like the characters of Idiocracy and the humans of Wall-E have through our short-term greed and idiocy fashioned a world like the nightmares of our movies.

*I know that Children of Men is a movie set in Britain. But it’s themes perfectly fit within an American context. It’s also a really freakin’ good movie.

For those of you who don’t already know the Voice of God has passed on into the other world (8/26/40 – 9/01/08).  Don LaFontaine best known as that kickass motherfucker who’s voice you’ve heard all over your favorite coming attractions has died, over 5000 trailers to be exact!  For those of you who are less educated he also starred in that nettlesome ass Gieco Commerical where that arrogant bitch recants her woes about losing two vehicles in a storm, like we give a shit, lady you’re just swimming in LaFontaine’s jet wash!

The news of Donny LaFontaine biting the big one comes as a personal disappointment to me, since I really had my hopes on Donald playing my wake.  His meliflous voice ricocheting all over the inside of McBubbleton’s Funeral Home would be something my honored guests would never forget.  On a side note, I heard he once kidnapped a random baby off the street and held it hostage as collateral until Michael Bay agreed to pay up for the work LaFontaine did on the trailer of Bad Boys 2.  Of course I do drink quite a bit so that might not be entirely accurate.

I love you LaFontaine!  Have fun upstairs!

- Mike James