@HollywoodSupa June 12, 2013

Yesterday tempers were high in the matchup between the Los Angeles Dodgers and the Arizona Diamondbacks. The tention erupted into violence after Ian Kennedy beaned the hell outta Zack Greinke. The benches cleared and EVERYBODY got involved including old timers Mark McGwire, Don Mattingly, and Alan Trammell.

THIS BRAWL IS WWE STYLE LOL PEOPLE GETTIN THROWN OVER THE ROPES AND ALL LOL #RoyalRumble

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Update (4/12/13): Greinke is out for approximately eight weeks. Quentin has been suspended for eight games, Hairston, Jr. for one game. Both of those players have appealed.

This blog has already morphed and transformed 100 different times tonight as more and more details are released about the ridiculous brawl at Petco Park. We have embedded videos from sources like MLB and ESPN to give you a clear timeline of what went down. Enjoy the madness, and vote in the polls below!

Bottom of the 6th inning:

Carlos Quentin, leading off the 6th for the Padres (who were down 2-1 at the time), took the count to 3-2 against Zack Greinke. That next pitch got away inside and nailed Quentin on the elbow, at which point he charged the mound. You can see the fight in its entirety here:

As many Tweeters reminded us, Quentin routinely leads the league in hit by pitches:

Carlos Quentin has been hit by 97 pitches since beginning of 2008, most in MLB

— Eric Stephen (@truebluela) April 12, 2013

These things happen when a batter crowds the plate and takes away the pitcher’s inside corner. And it doesn’t help that Quentin clearly has no idea how to get out of the way of an inside pitch (from the first game of the series on Tuesday):

As you see in the video of the brawl, Quentin and Greinke collided shoulder-to-shoulder, and the 50-pound advantage of the batter definitely took its toll on the smaller pitcher. The benches cleared as Dodgers catcher A.J. Ellis tackled Quentin to the ground. Many people thought Greinke may have yelled something to Quentin after the beaning, which this ESPN video shows is true (embedding ESPN videos does not work on WordPress):

http://espn.go.com/video/clip?id=espn:9162952

My expert lip-reading abilities tell me that Greinke said something along the lines of “F— off.” Hardly grounds for a rage-induced attack on Quentin’s part. For all I know, Greinke may just have been tired of Quentin’s act, as a fellow NL West pitcher became last season:

Last August, #SFGiants pitcher Vogelsong criticized #Padres Quentin for being “pissed” about an inside pitch. Called the reaction “tired.”

— Tom Krasovic (@UTkrasovic) April 12, 2013

Vogelsong on Quentin last yr: “The guy hammers balls over the plate and then gets pissed when you throw them inside.” csnbayarea.com/blog/andrew-ba…

— Bill Shaikin (@BillShaikin) April 12, 2013

Before we go any farther, let me bring you back a few years…

April 8th, 2009:

Different teams, a different division, in a different league; same matchup. In Greinke’s 2009 Cy Young year with the Kansas City Royals, he beaned then-White Sox Quentin in the 4th inning of an early-season game. Quentin took a step toward Greinke before being cooled off and taking first base.

After that outing (the Royals won 2-0), Greinke said it was an accident, and even mentioned that he was “scared” for Quentin at first, thinking it might hit his head:

“He had a reason for [being upset],” said Greinke of Quentin. “Any time you throw it that high, it’s justified. You’ve got to be better than that and not pitch like that. You’re going to make mistakes, but the last thing you want to do is hit someone where it could seriously hurt them. As soon as I let go of it, I was scared for him.”

So there was history. Whether or not it was intentional then, or intentional this year, is a matter we can likely never pinpoint. But in both instances, Greinke held a slim lead–hardly a situation in which you want to put anyone on base purposely.

Unless Quentin slapped Greinke’s mother years ago for some unknown reason, there is no motive for Greinke to throw at Quentin in the first place. Not to mention, that little dust-up was four years ago now. That’s a long, long time for someone to hold a grudge in sports.

Okay, memory lane was fun. Let’s bring it back to present day…

Halfway through the brawl:

In the video of the fight, you can see Matt Kemp going absolutely bonkers in the scrum (kerfuffle, if you will). At one point, he had multiple teammates restraining him after getting in a face-to-face shouting match with Padres manager Bud Black.

After it looked like the dust had settled, Dodgers utility man Jerry Hairston, Jr. took off toward the Padres dugout with his finger pointed at someone. If Don Mattingly’s postgame comments are any indication, the Padre in question was backup catcher John Baker, who was raised in my hometown of Walnut Creek, CA and does not seem the type to be involved.

But as Hairston, Jr. tweeted later, he was going at the Padres because he saw a player making fun of Greinke:

Losing Zack stings, but we ll pick each other up. Zacks like my little brother. Saw someone making fun of him being injured.Not cool!!

— Jerry Hairston, Jr.(@Therealjhair) April 12, 2013

Finally, the skirmish ended and Greinke was walked off the field by head trainer Sue Falsone. The umpires eventually ejected the pitcher, along with Quentin, Kemp, and Hairston, Jr. Shortly thereafter, Chris Capuano relieved Greinke on the bump for Los Angeles, and promptly allowed a game-tying single.

Though the unlikeliest of heroes, Juan Uribe, went deep later to help seal a 3-2 victory for the Dodgers, nothing could take the sting out of the news that broke after the game.

Postgame press conferences:

As soon as the game ended, fans demanded answers. Mattingly was happy to give them his, with multiple microphones stuck in his face. But first, the Dodgers got awful news regarding their $147 million pitcher:

BREAKING: Zack Greinke suffered a fractured left collarbone.

— Los Angeles Dodgers (@Dodgers) April 12, 2013

According to Yahoo’s Jeff Passan, who is by no means a medical expert but does his research very thoroughly, the Dodgers can expect to miss Greinke for at least six weeks:

Broken collarbone is usually a 6-to-8-week recovery. So looks like a June-or-so return for Zack Greinke.

— Jeff Passan (@JeffPassan) April 12, 2013

So needless to say, Mattingly was upset with the result of everything except the win. When pressed about the incident, Mattingly referred to Quentin as an “idiot” who has “zero understanding of the game of baseball,” given the situation in which he charged the mound.

Most shockingly, the skipper also declared that Quentin deserved to be suspended for as long as Greinke was on the shelf. Many writers on Twitter agreed with this sentiment, and yours truly can’t argue the idea. Of course, Quentin won’t get a lengthy suspension. Chances are, he’ll be looking at a four or five game suspension at the most. But we will have to wait and see what kind of action the league decides to take, and also to see if they discipline Kemp for his actions.

As if Quentin needed anyone else against him, A.J. Ellis told Dylan Hernandez of the L.A. Times that a few Padres apologized to him on their teammate’s behalf:

A.J. Ellis said #Padres players apologized for Quentin’s actions. “It’s not right, it’s not right,” he said one player told him.

— Dylan Hernandez (@dylanohernandez) April 12, 2013

We also have the video of Quentin’s postgame chat with reporters here, which is full of blame deflections and question avoidance. Black, Quentin’s manager, said the history between the two players did play a part in the brawl. Greinke responded with some comments of his own, insisting he didn’t mean to hit Quentin and never has in the past. Plus, additional notes from Mattingly on the injury at the beginning of the video:

After cooling off, you’d think the situation would be put to rest. Alas, this night got crazier…

In the clubhouse tunnel:

Kemp couldn’t let the issue go, and stayed extremely fired up at Quentin for injuring Greinke. He went after Quentin by the player’s exit, reportedly asking why he charged the mound and ended up injuring Kemp’s teammate:

Kemp and Quentin face to face in the hallway.

— Dylan Hernandez (@dylanohernandez) April 12, 2013

Players just ran out of Dodgers clubhouse…appears Matt Kemp and Carlos Quentin went after it in players parking lot

— Marty Caswell (@MartyCaswell) April 12, 2013

As Quentin walked into the parking lot, Kemp told him, “We’ll see, bitch.”

— Dylan Hernandez (@dylanohernandez) April 12, 2013

The Associated Press was able to snag a picture of the two players arguing (see below) before they were separated. The scene could have gotten much uglier, but it was luckily diffused in time. On one hand, you have to admire Kemp’s willingness to defend his pitcher and not back down from what he considered a threat. Leadership like that can pull a team closer together.

But on the other hand, the last person the Dodgers need getting suspended or playing upset is Kemp. The star center fielder is already struggling with the bat so far in 2013, and needs to recognize the difference between playing hard and playing pissed.

At the end of the night, Dodgers shortstop Hanley Ramirez (who was injured in the World Baseball Classic and has been on the DL all season) tweeted a slight silver lining, apparently in an attempt to calm the angry hordes:

Cast coming off today!!!! Thanks god!!!!!

— Hanley Ramirez (@HanleyRamirez) April 12, 2013

So the Dodgers won the game, the series, and a bit of hope from Ramirez. But losing Greinke is a huge blow for the Dodgers pitching staff, who will likely replace him with either Ted Lilly or Chris Capuano–both massive downgrades. San Diego and Los Angeles reconvene at Dodger Stadium for a three-game set on Monday, prompting the Dodgers official Twitter account to put out this gem after the game:

See you on Monday in Los Angeles: twitter.com/Dodgers/status…

— Los Angeles Dodgers (@Dodgers) April 12, 2013

At the very least, that series will be under an intense microscope by fans, players and journalists everywhere. For the Padres, a chance to be relevant. For the Dodgers, a chance to prove that they are more than a rich all-star team–that they can win with talent and heart and team chemistry.

Stay tuned to Three Up, Three Down for more coverage as the news continues to roll in. Please vote in the polls below, and feel free to share your comments with us, too.

- Jeremy Dorn (@Jamblinman)

Follow @3u3d on Twitter and LIKE us on Facebook at Three Up, Three Down for all your breaking MLB news!

Calico Joe was one of the books piled on the bottom shelf under FIC GRISHAM JO. I was clueless of what it would be but I grabbed it anyway. Now don’t judge me on my book picking strategies. I’m not an impulsive borrower. As a matter of fact, I had reasons – it was light (which doesn’t say much good about me) and it was not law-inclined. With the little I know about law, I was certain Calico Joe could not be a lawyer’s name or a crime or a firm. It was simply different. And I thought it would be a relaxing read from Grisham – a big break from a streak of attorney-at-law jargon.

I was right about one thing. Calico Joe could not be less lawful. Instead, it took me to a whole new world of jargon – baseball. What promised to be restful turned out to be intense. Yes it was only half the length of my successive Grisham reads, but it took me twice the effort to suck in the details. I know bases and bats and hits and pitches and homeruns. Everything else, however – foul ball, fast ball, walk, mound, bean, singles, doubles, triples, among other – were a little bit elusive. Plus, it took me a casual conversation with dad to make me realize that most, if not all, of the baseball teams mentioned were real. Dad’s only a bit more of a fan than I was so I never found out if the players and hall of famers quoted were also non-fictional. The only name that struck me was Joe DiMaggio who I know not as a baseball player but as a celebrity closely linked to Marilyn Monroe. What a pity.

Given the circumstances, I didn’t give up on my read. A few chapters of alternating present narration and flashbacks gave me the promise that I’m learning so much more than a ball game. I know it was obvious. There’s a baseball and a baseball stadium on the cover. I should’ve known there’d be baseball in it. And I did. But I didn’t know how much. Now I do, and it turns out, the percentage of baseball it had was overwhelming. But I was coping positively. And I’m proud of having survived until the last word of the author’s note. If I gave up soon after the bombing of sports jargon, I never would’ve proven my claim – indeed, I was learning something more than a ball game.

I learned about mistakes. Intentionally or unintentionally, we commit mistakes. Regardless of intent or premeditation of an act directed towards causing harm to others, they thrive. Our mistakes may paralyze our enemy for a while, but they haunt us for life. They can be stopped though. With a heart humble enough to admit wrong and strong enough to endure unknown consequences, our souls can rest in peace. Forgiveness and second chances. Who knew a morale such as those could be learned on a big diamond of grass?

Bernie Mack, Kathy Jones, Rebekah Black, and Jody Dean

If it came out of Jody’s mouth, we’re frantically trying to add it here! We’re updating this page constantly throughout the morning, so refresh often!

We have a few things going on this morning…

5:45AM – Notes from the News

6:45AM – We’re going to talk ‘Hollywood’ with Mike Evans, the Hollywood Insider.

7:00AM – Winning Wednesday!!!

7:15AM – William Shatner stops by the show!!!

7:45AM – They Walk Among Us

8:00AM – Winning Wednesday!!!

Rebekah Black…Life Coach

kluv

Marriage proposal, the white buffalo, and a ban on pot shops in…Notes from the News!!!

Beltre got beaned in the head last night!!!

What is your most recent pet peeve???

Kristen Stewart cheated on Team Edward!!!

Christian Bale visits shooting victims in Colorado.

Jessica Simpson may have given up on losing the baby weight!

Umm, there’s a mountain lion on my porch.

Mike Evans has all the Hollywood scoop!

Actor Chad Evertt passed away at 75.

‘Jeffersons’ star, Sherman Hemsley, passed away yesterday.

William Shatner stopped by the show!!!

Thank you Lord!!! Carly Rae Jepsen has a new single!!!

kluv

Dance ban, a giant lobster, and Disney drama in…They Walk Among Us!!!

The Jackson family saga continues…

Leave goat man alone!!!

• Caterpillar Bruiser Scrunch Damen Winterstiefel.
• Mit einem Obermaterial aus Leder.
• Gefüttert mit Kunstfell am Knöchel.
• Mit einer Gummilaufsohle mit Profil.
• Kann am Einstieg umgeklappt werden und mithilfe von einem Kordelzug zusammengerafft werden. Bitte beachten Sie, dass dieser Schuh weit geschnitten ist.

Caterpillar Bruiser Scrunch Damen Winterstiefel. Mit einem Obermaterial aus Leder. Gefüttert mit Kunstfell am Knöchel. Mit einer Gummilaufsohle mit Profil. Kann am Einstieg umgeklappt werden und mithilfe von einem Kordelzug zusammengerafft werden.Material: Obermaterial: Leder, Futter und Decksohle: Natürliche und synthetische Textilien, Laufsohle: Sonstiges Material.Bitte beachten Sie, dass dieser Schuh weit geschnitten ist.

• Caterpillar Bruiser Scrunch Damen Winterstiefel.
• Mit einem Obermaterial aus Leder.
• Gefüttert mit Kunstfell am Knöchel.
• Mit einer Gummilaufsohle mit Profil.
• Kann am Einstieg umgeklappt werden und mithilfe von einem Kordelzug zusammengerafft werden. Bitte beachten Sie, dass dieser Schuh weit geschnitten ist.

Caterpillar Bruiser Scrunch Damen Winterstiefel. Mit einem Obermaterial aus Leder. Gefüttert mit Kunstfell am Knöchel. Mit einer Gummilaufsohle mit Profil. Kann am Einstieg umgeklappt werden und mithilfe von einem Kordelzug zusammengerafft werden.Material: Obermaterial: Leder, Futter und Decksohle: Natürliche und synthetische Textilien, Laufsohle: Sonstiges Material.Bitte beachten Sie, dass dieser Schuh weit geschnitten ist.

Nationals General Manager Mike Rizzo responded to Cole Hamels’ admission he drilled Bryce Harper on purpose last night in harsh terms, saying MLB should suspend Hamels and calling out Hamels as “fake tough.”

“Players take care of themselves,” Rizzo said after I called him this morning. “I’ve never seen a more classless, gutless chicken [bleep] act in my 30 years in baseball … It was a gutless chicken [bleep] [bleeping] act. That was a fake-tough act. No one has ever accused Cole Hamels of being old school.”

“Cole Hamels says he’s old school? He’s the polar opposite of old school. He’s fake tough. He thinks he’s going to intimidate us after hitting our 19-year rookie who’s eight games into the big leagues? He doesn’t know who he’s dealing with.”

First of all…

Just shut the f*** up Rizzo. Seriously, just shut the f*** up.

You drafted a highly talented player with a truckload of baggage, as I have documented several times.

First there was this from Baseball Prospectus before Harper was drafted:

“It’s impossible to find any talent evaluator who isn’t blown away by Harper’s ability on the field, but it’s equally difficult to find one who doesn’t genuinely dislike the kid.

“One scout called him among the worst amateur players he’s ever seen from a makeup standpoint, with top-of-the-scale arrogance, a disturbingly large sense of entitlement, and on-field behavior that includes taunting opponents.”

“He’s just a bad, bad guy,” one front-office official told Baseball Prospectus. “He’s basically the anti-Joe Mauer.”

AFTER you draft the kid that was basically considered the biggest douche bag baseball has seen in decades (and that is saying quite a friggin’ bit) your organization does very little to rein his punk ass in.

The first sign you needed to do so was last spring training, where it was heard that the kid was rubbing some veteran teammates the wrong way. The sentiment was “he thinks he has actually already earned his way to the big leagues & he couldn’t be more wrong”.

Then there was an incident in the minors where the young phenom hit a towering home run off an opposing pitcher then not only admired his handy work, but was arrogant enough to blow a kiss at the man standing on the mound.

This was in the minor leagues…as a supposed f***in’ professional. This isn’t just about holding stuff against him he did in junior college, it goes well beyond that.

In yet another incident, Harper and the opposing pitcher exchanged words after Harper took a called third strike.

Harper hit a home run prior to the strikeout and seemed amazed the umpire dared to question his knowledge of the strike zone when called out. When the opposing pitcher reminded him where the bench was located at, the fuse was lit and it was “on”.

That type of behavior continued throughout the entire season, only ending when he was shut down for the remainder of the season with some minor, nagging injuries.

So how did your organization go about doing it’s best to get his head straight over the off-season.

How did the Nationals go about managing this dumpster fire waiting to happen?

You ignored the root of the problem you asshat.

Your big, bold move…was to make him shut down his Twitter account.

That’s it.

So don’t sit here & cry in my f***in’ ear about how “fake tough”, “gutless” and “chicken shit” Cole Hamels is when you can’t man up & grow a pair when dealing with your prized teenaged assclown.

Hamels did what pretty much everyone outside of the Nationals fan base or organization felt needed to be done. He let the kid know that kind of shit wasn’t appreciated & would not be tolerated at the professional level.

He didn’t go head-hunting, he buried one into his rib area and he did it in the National League, knowing full well that he was going to be the recipient of any retribution.

Not exactly what I consider to be the act of a “fake tough” guy.

Be thankful someone else had the stones to do what your little bitch ass couldn’t.

UPDATE: On a related note, Johnny Bench is right up there with me and thinks Hamels did nothing wrong, saying it is just part of the game. How do you detractors like dem apples?

For years, superstar author John Grisham has wanted to write a novel about baseball.  Unfortunately, the story just never came to him.  Then, a couple of years ago, Grisham read a story about Ray Chapman, a baseball player who was killed by getting hit with a fast pitch.  There was much speculation about whether the player was “beaned” intentionally.  Grisham thought this would make an excellent basis for a story, and so we have his latest novel, Calico Joe.

I was sent an advance review copy by the publisher.  I think it will have fairly broad appeal.  The story is really about three people:  Joe Castle (the player that got beaned), Warren Tracey (the player that hit him), and Paul Tracey (Warren’s son).  It’s a nice story about fathers and sons, baseball, and forgiveness.  The release date of April 10th should make this book a must have for father’s day shoppers everywhere.

While I thought the story was good, it doesn’t have the depth of emotion that the backstory could have brought forward.  Maybe it’s a guy thing.  Men don’t like to go too deep.  It’s also an easy read.  I finished the book in less than 24 hours.  Another recommendation:  someone should make this book into a movie.  There is so much visual information relating to the games, that I think it would come across better on screen.

3 stars (out of 5)
Published in 2012
198 pages

Later on, my wife and I headed out for lunch in Old Town Orange. It is one of our favorite places to go for a meal and stroll around the Plaza. On the drive over, my wife started talking about a movie she and Bronte had watched the previous evening. In the story, a young man looked back on playing on his high school football team. During a practice scrimmage he got the snot knocked out of him. The poor kid was dazed and in pain. The coach took him off the field, with no sympathy barked at him to walk it off. In man-talk, this is tough love, a teachable moment.

It hit me with a profound punch to say the very least. My wife, fully understood its impact and with a smirk allowed me to process through the moment. Over the past 3 months, I have been mulling over the issues surrounding a major career change. In spite of all that has happened, it has been a good thing (simply a matter of perspective). I am still dealing with frustration and pain from leaving a career I loved for the past 30 plus years, but the coaches voice keeps reminding me to walk it off.

My bride is a no-nonsense individual that views life in simple terms, directly, and is able to cut to the chase quickly. I tend to over process long after the issue is dead and buried. We are uniquely paired. I needed her wisdom today. Again, walk it off.

My friend Rod said it best, “You are in a season of rest”. Rest doesn’t mean sitting idol, but to pull away for a period to regroup, recoup, and rebuild. It is a season to recreate in order to move forward again with precision. A season for retooling! Interesting thought.

As a ball player, Rod mentioned that taking one for the team is often a sign of commitment and character. Getting beaned by a fastball is painful, but walking it off and heading for first base is thinking of the team. It is also a strong character trait. You don’t give up no matter what. Basically, no sympathy, get over it and move forward.

Wondrous how God has planned for us a unique wife and good friends to be available during intense personal challenges to comfort or kick us in the tail. It is a shared experience with the ones around us not to be under estimated. It is God’s great love, tough love at times, to walk it off and grow again.

 Psalm. 4:1 Hear me when I call, O God of my righteousness! You have relieved me in my distress;  Have mercy on me, and hear my prayer.

 Psalm. 18:32-36  It is God who arms me with strength, and makes my way perfect. He makes my feet like the feet of deer, and sets me on my high places. He teaches my hands to make war, so that my arms can bend a bow of bronze. You have also given me the shield of Your salvation; Your right hand has held me up, Your gentleness has made me great. You enlarged my path under me, so my feet did not slip.

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12  Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help him up. Again, if two lie down together, they will keep warm; but how can one be warm alone?  Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him. And a threefold cord is not quickly broken.

Bronte’s dad

p.s. Bronte smiles!

Baseball is fun — fun to play and watch.

Getting hit by a baseball is not fun — not fun in the groin, back or face.

Tyler Fox, a player for the Denver-based PlayBall baseball team, knows at least part of that is true.

On Sunday, Fox was hit in the face by a pitch during a game against the Oklahoma City Ambassadors in Parker, Colo.

The pitcher fired, Fox turned his hips towards the mound, and a split second later, the ball drilled him in the face like an overhand right from Ernie Shavers. Teammates jokingly say he cried like a baby. I almost did looking at the damage three days later. The mass looks a lot like something my mom might cook (and she is not known for her fine cuisine).

After he was hit, Fox began walking down the third base line — fully unaware of what was happening — and abruptly fell to the ground. He said the last thing he remembers is blood running down his face. Hopefully his pinch runner scored. Hey, it’s the small victories that count.

To paraphrase my introduction…

Getting hit by a baseball is not fun — not fun in the groin, back or face… though getting a nice impromptu portrait of someone else who has been hit, well, that’s just a dandy, snazzy and eye catching.

The baseball seams on his cheek coupled with the light made for a nice portrait. I am sure, however, that Fox would have rather his faced remained unharmed.

I guess all of this will at least teach him that sometimes it is O.K. to take his eye off the ball.

-AAron

Jackson is batting .337 so far this term

The offending fastball crept very high and tight on Jackson, who joined Jim Leyland’s side from the Yankees as part of the Curtis Granderson trade this winter, striking him on his helmet just above the brow.

“He got smoked pretty good,” said Detroit manager Leyland. “It’s just one of those unfortunate things that happen, and it’s part of the game. He came around pretty quickly and he appears to be OK, but you’ve got to be extremely cautious with that type of situation. “

After a scan the center fielder was declared okay but will most likely miss the final game of the series in Dodger Stadium, much to Leyland’s chagrin.

Since his move out of pinstripes and into Tiger Stadium the 6-foot-1 star is batting .337/.393/.451 with a home-run and six stolen bases.

It was hot man. You know, August in the sun belt. We were nuts enough to spend the afternoon sucking at golf. What’s more, we decided to suck on the longest course in town. So, when we were about four holes from heat stroke, my oldest brother, Chip, hacks one into a grouping of Pine trees. Being the good baby brother I am, I went in to help look around in the tall grass to find his ball faster. That’s when I heard a series of cracks that sounded like small arms fire. First I heard it, then I saw it.

“What the hell”?

And I looked over and my brother was holding the top of his head.

“Somebody hit me in the head with a freaking ball!”

Man, I couldn’t help from laughing. So, as my brother described it, sirens were going off inside his head and flames were shooting out from a hole on top of his head. Didn’t sound very pleasurable but it was really excruciatingly funny.

These two geezers who were putting out on a green near the pines saw my brother get whacked and yelled over to see if he was OK.

“Hey Sonny. You OK?”
Pointing in the direction of my other brother, one of the geezers said,
“I think a fella from over there hit that ball”

To which my brother replied, “Yeah, I think it was one of my brothers”.

Which surprised me because he only has two brothers and I was standing right next to him. He must’ve really sustained a fantastic whack in the noodle not be able to distinguish which one did it. I mean, would it be too much to ask for a guy to pin the offense on the right brother? Anywho, Geezer number two said, “Well, guess you can’t do too much about that”.

Yeah right.

About 20 seconds later, my middle brother comes around the corner with his clubs like he was late for a party and said,

“Hey, you guys see my ball around here”? and of course Chip said,

“Yeah, you jacknard, you bounced it off the top of my head”!

And here it is. It’s what we were waiting for. As my brother and I were laughing the rest of our cracks off, he said,

“It’s not funny”!