*Every week I send a goofy email out to an e-list for my Christian fellowship. Since some of the stuff in them is somewhat funny, I thought it would be worth posting them on here. Note that names have been changed to preserve privacy.

Table of Contents

I. Introduction

II. Absolute Monarchy

III. Jocundity

–

I. Introduction

I was in downtown Ithaca, right at the intersection of Seneca and Cayuga, when I saw something that brought my mind to this particular email. It was a magical afternoon; the weather reminded me of leisurely mid-summer days full of feasting and dancing. It was as if some force had worked on the cold winter air to make it like the middle of May again.

Hello everyone, my name is jPothen. My parents decided to give me that esoteric name because they admired an ancient Jewish king. Last Wednesday I finally fulfilled my promise to Dorothy about giving the Lion of Judah his claws back. This week, I think it’s time for something more appropriate for the time of year when we all turn into bon vivants.

–

II. Absolute Monarchy

Pilate asked him, “So you are a king?” Jesus answered, “you say that I am a king. For this I was born, and for this I came into the world…”

The true King is ruling from His throne high in heaven, and I suspect that His jollity is beyond our own comprehension Yet as you and I both know, his good cheer was hard won. I’m going to indulge in a little bit of amateur theololgy to note that his blood poured out became wine. Wine is the symbol of joy in the New Testament, and it reminds me of the proper response to the sacrifice he offered: a contemplation that leads us to joy.

We used to be petrified (not unlike Hermione), but now that we are thawed we can become they royalty that we are. Indeed, all of us are kings and queens, princes and princesses. The submission of our rule to His makes us truly just and yet merciful. And the recognition of the royalty of the people around us may make us more loving and enjoyable.

The moral for this week? Don’t be a sad-sack. Cut loose a little, laugh, feast, maybe dress up with a nice coat, and treat your local beavers properly – even if they knaw down your favorite oak tree.

–

III. Jocundity

What? That’s it for this week! I’m already counting down until I see Santa Claus. Go read some Tin-Tin or something if you’re bored.

“Lucy Harmer’s shamanic astrology book is truly amazing. I use it in my work every day as a therapist to help people understand their personality and find their pathway through life.”
–Jean-Francois Beltrami, counselor and kinesiologist

Welcome to Lucy Harmer’s Shamanic Astrology monthly forecast for the Northern Hemisphere! Each month Lucy shares inspiration and ideas for the coming weeks from her book Shamanic Astrology: Understanding Your Spirit Animal Sign.

Shamanic Astrology is based on the study of the movement of the sun and the moon during the different seasons of the year. There are twelve astrological ‘”signs” which are represented by twelve different spirit animals. To find out your own personal spirit animal sign (the sign you were born under), please check the table of spirit animals at the end of this article. Shamanic Astrology teaches us that inner power derives from knowing the properties, characteristics, and qualities of each spirit animal (known as their “medicine”), and applying this in our own lives.

Each month I will focus on the spirit animal for that month, and describe the “energy” of the month itself and also the influence of the moon. I will also indicate which other spirit animal signs will find this month to be particularly beneficial, and why.

November 22-December 21: OWL

Month of Hibernation and Long Nights

Spirit Animal Sign of the Month:
Owl is the spirit animal which corresponds to November 22 – December 21 (in the northern hemisphere). If you were born at this time, your spirit animal sign is Owl and you share Owl’s strengths of being fair, honest, wise, philosophical, idealistic, optimistic, and independent. You are someone who enjoys the good life! You may also share some of Owl’s weaknesses and can have a tendency to be restless, negligent, intolerant, proud, irresponsible, tactless, superficial and excessively optimistic.

Medicine: Owl’s medicine is the ability to seek out truth and justice in all
circumstances. This can be used in any ambiguous or unclear situation, to find the path to follow and to restore order.
Element: Fire
Stone: Obsidian
Color: Gold
Plant: Mistletoe

Energy of the season:
Owl’s month, which ends with the winter solstice, is that of hibernation and long nights. The sun is at its lowest in the sky and the nights are at their longest. This is a period for introspection, spiritual seeking, visions, plans and preparation for the future. Everything undertaken during this month will need a greater dose of enthusiasm, spontaneity, and optimism than at other times and will have to be on a sound ethical basis. Projects conceived now are often highly ambitious.

Energy of the moon:
Owl’s new moon started on Nov 16th and the full moon is on December 2nd 2009. The period from November 22nd until December 2nd is the ideal time for conceiving or launching projects. These will have a high rate of success, as long as they have a sound ethical foundation. After the full moon, from December 3rd until 15th December, time is best used for introspection and deep spiritual growth. This is a time for learning from the past and for setting new goals for the future. December 16th brings the new moon in Snow Goose; this is a time for putting new structures in place for the year to come, with much determination.

This month is particularly favorable for the following signs:

Owl:
If your sign is Owl the energy of this month is very favorable because it corresponds to the month and the moon of your birth. A new cycle is about to start in your life and this is the best time to start planting seeds. Use the sun’s energy to take stock and head off in a new direction.

Falcon/Salmon:
If your sign is Falcon or Salmon, this is a very lucky month for you, with lots of harmony because you are in your own fire element. A multitude of opportunities will open up for you in this period and this is the best time to give destiny a helping hand!

Raven/Otter:
For Raven and Otter people, this is a very dynamic month, full of energy which favors the conception and birth of new projects. You will feel new motivation and a renewal of your energy at this time.

Table of Spirit Animal Signs:

To find your spirit animal sign, just locate your birthday from the dates below, according to your place of birth. If you were born north of the equator (eg; USA, Canada, Europe), then look for your date of birth in the column headed “Northern Hemisphere.” If you were born south of the equator (eg; Australia, New Zealand, South Africa), then look for your date of birth in the column headed “Southern Hemisphere.”

© Copyright 2009 Lucy Harmer

Shamanic Astrology is available for purchase directly through NorthAtlanticBooks.com, as well as major book stores and online retailers.

CLICK HERE to learn more about courses, seminars and workshops offered by Lucy Harmer.

CLICK HERE to learn more about Shamanic Astrology.

CLICK HERE to learn more about Discovering Your Spirit Animal.

*Photography: Empty L.A. – where the humans have all been removed from the city – is another illustration of absence. [highindustrial]

*Online: Tumblr is wine, Twitter is crack – what are some other popular internet vices? defined. [coudal]

*Food: Beaver recipes. For preparing beaver. [neatorama]

*Videos: This post linking to all 6 parts about a BBC documentary called “Krautrock” is worth clicking through to for the title alone – “stretchmarks on a rock cabbage.”

Also, Pitchfork has posted the documentary “Ladies and Gentlemen… Mr. Leonard Cohen” for a week. The documentary depicts Mr. Cohen in his days as a poet; before he took up pop music. [mefi]

*Phones: And the next blook deal goes to…”People Talking on Bananas.” (This site should auto-play Raffi singing “Bananaphone” when you open it.) Well, the next one to get a deal AFTER Regretsy. [presurfer]

*Music: Listen to these Singing Science recordings. Clear, earnest, strangely compelling. [coudal]

*Fashion: Whoa. If I were a woman I would totally get a book handbag! I think. (I don’t have any tendencies in that direction.) [craft]

*Today’s links: F

Do you have a to-do list? Does your partner give you, or suggest things for you to do as well? We tend to think that men are the only ones with a honey-do list.  Well that’s just not so.

I normally have ‘chores’ that fall into the weekend list; grocery shopping, cleaning house (to the extent that I ever do housework), maybe leaf blowing.

Next week I won’t have to worry about weekend chores. No job, no structure, no time lines….

But for now… note to self: razor blades

Como diría el Broso, “Hola piojosos”, pos acá les vengo dejando dos videos de una banda que me late un buen y que me cae a toda madre. Si alguien en este congal toca el bajo, sin albur por esta vez ñeros, no me podrá dejar mentir cuando digo que todo bajista ha tenido sueños húmedos con las líneas de bajo de este cabrón, así como trepadas de payaso con la persona en cuestión porque está bien cagado. Los dejo con Primus con el castorzote café de Winona.

Primero el video de estudio

Luego el de en vivo, no menos cagado

Aprovecho para mostrar mi repudio a que en la parte baja del video que se reproduce, sale el pinche comercial de iTunes para comprar la rola. Hijos de puta, algo de respeto pinches culeros atascados!

Awesome song!

Growing up in rural Canada (Ontario, to be exact – it’s a province,,,kind of like a state, but with different spelling) my parent’s owned a business. It was a motel and restaurant called The Beaver Motel and Restaurant. My dad actually built the restaurant on the property with his own hands. My parents worked their asses off in that place 24/7. It was a good upbringing though because there was always great food on the table and, if you needed something, my folks were always close by.

However, I’m always glad that Mexican food wasn’t popular at the time…I can hear the patrons now:

Let’s go to the Beaver for a fish taco.

(Mommies can have sick senses of humour too, you know)

It’s become fashionable, particularly among journalists, to lament the sorry state of contemporary journalism. Papers may be folding, reporters may be getting laid off, sure, but that doesn’t stop devoted professionals from bringing you the news that matters, day after day.

Take Debbye Turner Bell here of CBS’s The Early Show.

Make that DOCTOR Debbye Turner Bell, former Miss America.

Since she was crowned Miss America 1990, Dr. Debbye Turner has spoken to 500,000 students at hundreds of schools, youth organizations, and college campuses. Her topics include personal excellence, unrelenting determination, goal setting, and the importance of a solid education. She strongly believes that any person has the potential for success no matter their race, socio-economic background, or gender. She uses her own life as an example of triumphing over the odds. It took seven years, eleven tries, in two states to get to the Miss America Pageant.

Heartwarming, is it not? Why, her parents must be so proud. It must be a great joy to them to turn the television on and see their little girl, all grown up and getting sprayed with urine by a flailing Canadian beaver.

THERE SHE IS, MISS AMERICA
From “The Miss America Pageant”
(Bernie Wayne)

There she is, Miss America
There she is, your ideal
The dream of a million girls who are more than pretty can come true
in Atlantic City
For she may turn out to be the Queen of femininity

There she is, Miss America
There she is, your ideal
With so many beauties she took the town by storm
With her all-American face and form

And there she is
Walking on air, she is
Fairest of the fair, she is
There she is – Miss America

Yes, this is a post about how to eat beaver. Not just ANY beaver, you understand; we have us some STANDARDS around these parts (these ones right down…here) and will not show you how to gnaw on gristly old beaver, the kind like an old baseball mitt made out of bbq jerky.

This kind:

The wife coyly tried to explain her purchase of a new pair of expensive imported panties. “After all, dear,” she said to her husband, “You wouldn’t expect to find fine perfume in a cheap bottle, would you?”

“No,” her husband replied. “Nor would I expect to find gift wrapping on a dead beaver.”

No indeed!

We’re all about the fresh, young beaver here. Although perhaps not as much as the lesbians down at Lick might like, now that we think of it.

Where were we? Oh yes, speaking of ourselves in the second-person plural, for no reason we can fathom other than it’s practice for when Randy Andy comes to his senses, loses some weight, and gets his butt off the golf course and marries me. Or Hot Ginge, I’m easy.

Anyway, it does look like some people could use instructions for the most basic things, like the great Canadian (yes, it’s Canadian, check out the website) art of beaver-eating. Why, we’ve even got 1/24th of each day devoted to beaver!

Dude, it’s too late for us to help you. Whereas, in my country beaver-eating is a competitive sport.

And the Aussies are no slouches at taking care of beavers, as you can see in this video that Metro has been waiting almost exactly one year for me to steal.

The Brits, on the other hand, have to go to great, bureaucracy-enveloping lengths to be reintroduced to beavers. What, they don’t have Lavalife there? Apparently, they killed every one they could find, thus bringing to life the old cliche about, If I see something I’ve never seen before, I’ll shoot it. Boarding school has a lot to answer for, I’m telling you.

Russia, of course, being somewhat desperate and all out of ponies and small children since Yeltsin sold every mammal larger than a husky, has developed its own way to prepare beaver for eating, and here it is, with photos. Warning! Very wet and lots of bare flesh!

The Catholic Church, surprisingly, has no issue with the Beav, and encourages people to eat it on Friday. Well, it’s a start, I guess.

The 17th century Catholic Church actually declared beavers to be a fish according to dietary restrictions, meaning they are ok to eat on both Fridays and throughout Lent.

Well, this should be more widely known, is all I have to say about the matter!

Some organizations can be so forward-thinking. Look at the Boy Scouts, for instance:

Did you know that the US Cub Scouts give a Silver Beaver award? I nearly got thrown out of the leader’s meeting for laughing so much when they gave it to a retired woman with grey hair.

Hmmm, it’s given for Outstanding Service to Youth. I know more than one or two beavers that would qualify under those criteria!

In the spirit of these fine organizations and countries comes a post from Bug Girl on her serendipitous discovery of a tome of wisdom devoted, at least in substantial part, to instructions on pleasing one’s wife with wild games and, of course, the preparation and consumption of beaver.

The author claims the meat is “dark, moist and tender”; Hmmmm, sounds like somebody’s got a touch of Jungle Fever.

I wonder if it has some tips on how to stuff a beaver? It’s been so long I’ve forgotten.

I happened to find this very entertaining Extension Publication in a box: Good Eating from Woods and Fields.  It’s a 1960 reprint of an earlier pamphlet, and what a cultural artifact it is!

I couldn’t decide which of the photos to put here, and so went with my Beavis and Butthead instinct: Roast Beaver.

The pamphlet opens with instructions on how to please ‘the housewife” and also contains historic info on game hunting. Except… they sort of forgot to mention all the people that lived here and hunted for centuries before the Europeans with guns showed up. Whoops!

There are also recipes for rabbit, squirrel, woodchuck, and muskrat.

This handsome buck was in front of our neighbors’  home this afternoon.  I can be ignored but that shaggy black dog must be watched every second.  These two does at North Mountain Park were on full canine alert.

Two trees felled by local flat-tails, that would be beavers.  You can see their handiwork, but never the workers themselves.  They’re constantly on the night shift.  Who said logging is dead in Oregon?  These trees are along Bear Creek across the street from North Mountain Park’s nature center.

Rainbow over Bear Creek above.  To the left snow on Mount Ashland.

I guess Beaver has the inside track on not flunking class?!? Uhm, Beav — wipe that spot off your nose…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_oEUvP7tAi4&hl=en

1 idea, 3 styles to pick from. Yes…that is a mouse and a beaver rolling a money-bank down the road. If you’re wondering why then you’ll have to wait until next month to see the whole story…!

Wow, talk about service! Reaction Grid has set up our first four sims in a matter of hours. And my big thrill? I can change sim names for free!

A brave new world for this little beaver!

Stay tuned as we discover what we can do (we really only know the Second Life paradigm but are eager to learn and make huge 256 metre tori!).

looks like Ener?

If you thought the world’s largest cocktail napkin was cool (it is a top search term for some odd reason on the iliveisl blog), wait till you see the incredibly amazing giant rotating donut (oh, such talent – how can one beaver have such creative gifts!) =p

Just in case – a torus is a donut shaped prim, so the talent to make one is . . . well, pretty nil! =D

First plans are to actually get there (could be a challenge for this beaver – where is Ener Hax to hold my paw?) =0

And then to create public use spaces just like we have in Second Life! As you may tell, I am a little excited (read: full on spaz mode engaged).

Hey, if you can’t enjoy what you do, then why do it!

i live in simulator lands earns it’s “s” today! =)

Stay tuned . . . .

*hmm, giant donut could be hollowed into a meeting space*

martini time sounds awefully tempting!

reposted from iliveisl’s blog and please note that this blog will be moving to a self-hosted WordPress blog soon

Each month author Lucy Harmer dedicates her journal entries to the theme of “transformative and inspirational living” – finding the fun, magic and laughter in everyday occurrences! She explores ideas, thoughts and quotes from her two books, Discovering Your Spirit Animal and Shamanic Astrology.

November 2009

Shamanic Astrology
Exploring the Personality of your Spirit Animal Sign

© Copyright 2009 Lucy Harmer

Last month in my journal (October 2009), I gave an overview of what Shamanic Astrology is. This month, I am going to explore the twelve spirit animal signs of the medicine wheel a little deeper, so that you can begin to discover the special qualities each sign possesses.

There are twelve astrological “signs” on the medicine wheel, which are represented by twelve different spirit animals. Shamanic Astrology teaches us that inner power derives from knowing the properties, characteristics, and qualities of each spirit animal (known as their “medicine”), and applying this in our own lives.

To get you started, here are some of the main strengths and weaknesses of each of the twelve spirit animals. It is really interesting to note that weaknesses are often just a mirror of our strengths and qualities. What we see as “weaknesses” can often be transformed into “strengths.” Take Falcon people, for example, whose “weaknesses” can be their tendency to be impulsive and headstrong. Transformed, these qualities become Falcon people’s strengths – their spontaneity and pioneering nature.

(If you are not sure which spirit animal sign you are, you can find out by looking your birthday up in the second table below – “Which animal sign are you?”)

Strengths and Weaknesses of the twelve spirit animal signs:

I always find it fascinating to look up the qualities of my friends, family and work colleagues. It is amazing how much their spirit animal sign can tell you about why they may behave in certain ways!

You can find out more about the personality of your own spirit animal and how you relate to the other signs, in my book Shamanic Astrology: Understanding Your Spirit Animal Sign. You can also discover the different spirit animal clans that you, your friends and family belong to, and your own special plant, stone, element, color and life path.

Which animal sign are you?
To find your spirit animal sign, just locate your birthday from the dates below, according to your place of birth. If you were born north of the equator (eg; USA, Canada, Europe), then look for your date of birth in the column headed “Northern Hemisphere.” If you were born south of the equator (eg; Australia, New Zealand, South Africa), then look for your date of birth in the column headed “Southern Hemisphere.”

This month, I wish you lots of fun and magic in exploring the strengths and qualities of your own spirit animal sign, and discovering those of your friends, family and work colleagues too!

Love and blessings,
Lucy

Shamanic Astrology is available for purchase directly through NorthAtlanticBooks.com, as well as major book stores and online retailers.

CLICK HERE to learn more about courses, seminars and workshops offered by Lucy Harmer.

CLICK HERE to learn more about Shamanic Astrology.

CLICK HERE to learn more about Discovering Your Spirit Animal.

If you want to expend your developed fashion sense and reflect that refined taste onto others, by making visual your particularly good taste and high spirits, wrap yourself in a stylish fur coat! These days, fur coats are no longer for merely special occasions. There are many fur fashions hitting the market, and it is satisfying fur lovers everywhere.

There is a high demand from quality fashion lovers everywhere to obtain fur coats. This demand is met through a variety of means, one of which includes international trade sectors. With the coats on the market, one must expend the use of these coats. Some ways they are going about this is through fashion marketing, fashion shows, fur trade fairs and so much more.

New designs of fur coats are coming out all the time and being purchases and worn. You can pick your style according to what your preference is. Choose from full length fur coats, fur-lined jackets, coats to the knee or pretty much any design you are interested in buying. Regardless of you design interest, as you can buy nearly any fur coat and look stylish, fur coats have surpassed practicality and become downright fashionable.

One type of fur coat in particular served many uses in the 19th century and was rendered quite popular and extremely useful: beaver. In that time, they were used for things such as jackets, collars, coats, and fur trimmings. Needless to say, they were considered quite valuable. So valuable, in fact, that the demand began rise and since regulations were poor, beaver soon became and endangered species! Beaver fur hats were considered a symbol of status for men, and beaver fur coats for women. Due to endangered species crisis, they adopted a new trend to associate with wealth by substituting beaver hats with silk hats. Tighter regulations today have deterred any population threat to the beavers.

Beyond beavers’ basic uses, however, they are valued for even more reasons! Their fur is water repellant, and has amazing warmth abilities, which needless to say, would make for a very warm and practical coat. They are semi-aquatic animals, who are large, and live in North America, sporting dark brown to reddish hair.

Beaver fur coats are considered one of the best types of fur coats, much as they were in the 18th century. Those who wear these beaver fur coats tend to be associated with a certain class. Beaver fur coats are still considered and valued to be one of the best kinds of fur coats out there, so if you want to relish in the beauty, warmth, and associations brought to you by beaver fur coats, then what are you waiting for? Go relish.

I NEED YOU HELP!!!

I need your help, I’m on a mission to connect 1,000,000 people with 1,000,000 cars, I have recently partnered with a few companies in the tri-state area that have an OVER STOCK of vehicles that need drivers, yes these cars need drivers. They range from bank repossessions to trade ins, these vehicles range from 6 months old to 25 years old, manufactures from AM General to Yugo, trucks to motorcycles, forklifts to bulldozers, what ever you are looking for I can offer at a discount to any advertised retail price. The inventory changes daily, I come across many vehicles.

I am working mostly in the New York, New Jersey area, this does not make a difference, even if you are in a different state or country I can still ship and/or export you the car you are looking for.

I like to work with individuals, but I will take on a legitimate businesses looking to liquidate or up grade their fleets.

I’m not looking for anyone to sell anything all I’m asking is if you know someone looking for any kind of car THAT DOES NOT WANT TO PAY FULL RETAIL PRICE, forward this e-mail and my phone number and this is what I will do for you and anyone that buys a vehicle.

I’m going to give away 10% on the purchase price of any vehicle up to $1000 to your favorite non-profit charity in your name. I’m not only going to give the store away, I’m going to give it away in someone else’s name. What is he crazy! No I just know if I help others help others, life is better for all. This means if you or someone buys a car or light truck for $2500 I will give $250, buy for $4000 I give $400, buy for $6,000 I give $600.00, etc on up to $1000.00

Listen to what I am saying I am going to give away most if not all of my profit in your name to YOUR charity this is a win win for all. We all know someone who needs a car or wants to upgrade to a newer model and wants to save some money. You get a tax deductible donation that did not come out of your pocket, and your charity gets the help it desperately needs, if that’s not giving I don’t know what is.

That’s all I’m asking this in not a joke I am very very serious. Please read all attachments, if you have any questions you can call between 8am-6pm. At 631 671 9779 You can e-mail questions and vehicle request at ejacksoniaia@gmail.com, I will need to talk to you to verify all emailed info so don’t forget the best phone number to call you back

Every day I check the statistics on my blog. Just the total visitors. After all I am not a fanatic.

Much.

But occasionally I look at the other statistics WordPress provides. It is interesting (to me) to see what brings people to my blog.

So here are the ten most viewed articles on the archive over the past 30 days.

Pornography, Censorship and Art. Same old, Same old!

The Best Camel Toe Picture Ever Taken

Nude Gymnastics and Swimming

Second Best Camel Toe Picture Ever Taken

Shaving Her Beaver

Nine Inch Nails Meets Harry Potter

The Seven Dwarves

Blonde Chick with a Nice Pussy

What Is The Speed Of Light?

It is fascinating that top of the list is a serious article although I realise it has only gained popularity because Google decided to use the image of a young girl from that post as their top image for a search on “Bill Henson”.

I’m not sure just why an image lifted from “Looks Just Like” has jumped up into sixth spot or why three innocuous cartoons are in the list.

The entry which leaves me shaking my head is at number 10. Out of 3,399 posts on the archive (this is post No. 3,400) a serious – well, sort of -  post on science rates this highly. It doesn’t seem to fit with the other nine which could be grouped as “Sex, Celebrity and Censorship”.