If the State taketh away, taketh it back!

This is quite possibly one of the coolest ideas the MTA has had in the last decade. According to the Gothamist, the MTA rolled out an LCD at the Bedford Avenue station on the L train line in NYC. Ordinary displays they are not? Displaying relevant information, it might.

The screens cull data from the L line’s computerized operating system, which tracks exact train locations and then shows them advancing (or not!) along the screen.

That is pretty cool. This could stop a lot of idiots (myself included) from constantly having to lean over the platform edge just to see if a train is coming or not. On the other hand, NYC’s already bitchy and cranky ass commuters could also have a whole lot more to bitch about. For example, now that they know the position of the train; if it’s not moving, they will whine about that instead of just not knowing where the train is if it is in between two stations with a reasonable amount of distance.

A year ago, the MTA started to roll more and more lightboards onto station platforms (L and 6 train line) that displayed simple information such as the time and date and whether a train was arriving or not. Most of them are hung from the danky ceilings of platforms and go unnoticed, but I really think the LCDs could take off, given that they are placed in accessible spots and not outside of the turnstiles in a token booth, where riders on the platform can’t see it. Hopefully the LCDs won’t be scratched left and right by jerks who have no respect for the subways.

Nevertheless, I am expecting great things from new MTA Chairman Jay Walder. His goal is to bring the MTA into the 21st century through technology and overhaul the aging system. I welcome this guy 1000%. He is doing things and will make this beautiful maze of a transit system into something that will meet the expectations of the world. Down with MetroCards and bring on the RFID tapping cards.

Gothamist

Après Coney Island, parenthèse étrange, retour au début de l’histoire avec Brooklyn et ses rues si spécifiques, ses “brownstones” (ces maisons qui m’ont inévitablement fait penser à celle du Cosby Show), la gentillesse de ses habitants et tant d’autres choses. Brooklyn est la circonscription la plus peuplée de New York, faisant d’elle la quatrième ville des États-Unis. Autant dire qu’il ne s’agit pas d’un petit quartier …

Reflet hautement symbolique …

Nous avions loué un appartement dans le quartier où vivent en majorité des Afro-Américains. Autant dire que nous faisions tache dans le décor mais nous avons été accueillies à bras ouverts. Vous connaissez beaucoup d’endroits où tous les habitants de la rue vous saluent sur votre passage le matin (et le soir) ? A part chez Disney … Bien évidemment, tout n’est pas si joyeux dans ce quartier, mais nous nous y sentions comme chez nous. On sait que Brooklyn en général n’a pas toujours eu une bonne réputation, je me souviens notamment (ne riez pas) de … Tony Mitchelli dans Madame est Servie qui venait de Brooklyn et souhaitait travailler ailleurs parce qu’il ne voulait pas que sa fille grandisse là-bas. Aujourd’hui, les choses ont bien changé, Brooklyn devient agréable et branché. Le risque c’est que les branchés friqués fassent grimper le taux de l’immobilier et que les habitants plus pauvres soient obligés d’aller plus loin … Cependant, d’après ce qu’on a pu voir à de nombreuses reprises, les New-yorkais qui traversent le pont pour s’y installer semblent être ceux que le tumulte  et le coût de la vie à Manhattan ont fait fuir et pour qui (pour la majorité) l’argent n’est pas un moteur. Ils aspirent à plus de tranquillité, de verdure (eh oui!), et d’une façon de vivre plus “réelle”. Pourvu que ça dure …

Les clichés qui suivent ont été pris à la fois dans le quartier de “DUMBO” et celui de Bedford Avenue, dont je reparlerai.

© Mam’zelle Poupée // In my meadow. Tous droits réservés.

Le prochain billet “made in Brooklyn” ? Il sera notamment pour les papilles … les gourmands vont me détester

]]> http://wrennoble.wordpress.com/2009/08/11/williamsburg-walks-sunday-morning/ Tue, 11 Aug 2009 18:55:35 +0000 Wren Noble http://wrennoble.wordpress.com/2009/08/11/williamsburg-walks-sunday-morning/

Pedestrian-Only Times Square (Source: The World Edition)

In a dramatic reappropriation of urban space for public use, Times Square was closed off to cars earlier this summer. Less well known is that Summer Streets are already in place all over the five-boroughs this summer, thanks to the NYC Department of Transportation (DOT) and that a section of 34th street will have a pedestrian-only zone when the next bus rapid transit (BRT) phase is installed. Interestingly, there have been many studies showing that traffic does not deteriorate when public space is added – even a mathematical theorem called the Braess Paradox to explain the phenomenon.

This Saturday, Williamsburg Walks converts Bedford Avenue into a pedestrian-only zone, brought to you by L Magazine and the Neighbors Allied for Good Growth (NAG). The event tagline: “rethink your public space.” Yours truly, with Kittens Ablaze, will be performing at L Magazine’s Live on Bedford event on Bedford Avenue between N 6th and N 7th streets at 2pm.

Williamsburg Walks (Source: Streetsblog)

It has been argued that bureaucracy makes it difficult to engender change in New York. But many public initiatives carry the fingerprints of particular officials and their personal interests. Iris Weinshall, former NYC DOT commissioner, pitched and implemented the concept of “Thru Streets,”which improved cross-town travel time up to 25% by prohibiting turns except on Park Avenue and a few other exceptions. Similarly, although Janette Sadik-Khan, NYC DOT commissioner, has been making waves recently for her research travel to far-flung places such as Bogotá and Beijing, we can credit the successful implementation of the 200-mile New York City bike network to her avid interest in cycling.

Frank Lloyd Wright's Broadacre City

The automobile and road culture of the United States can be attributed to cold war defense programs such as the Eisenhower Interstate System, infrastructure stimulus packages throughout the last century, urban planning theories that glorified technology and the automobile, and most simply – that Henry Ford was an American. Regardless, it is important to realize that public space is at a premium whether in dense urban areas such as New York City or in areas of great suburban sprawl. Car-free zones in urban areas, with a mix of recreational and entertainment activities, address important issues on how public space should be created, allocated and utilized.

We left work at 3 and were drunk by 4. By 5 we had purchased neon purple galoshes and by 6 we were unable to walk in them, or walk at all. By 7 we were soaking wet. At 8 we were in the mud, watching TV on the Radio and swearing, water rolling down our foreheads and dripping down our nose, sliding mascara streaks into our eyes and across our salty lips. At 9 we were in Brooklyn. 10 we were walking a stranger’s dog down Bedford Ave, 11 we were drowning out the screaming girl band with more booze, 12 we were back in the city. 1 was one more scotch and soda. 2 was too much.

I WANT TO TURN YOU ALL ON to a new weekly feature on Brownstoner, the powerhouse Brooklyn real-estate website without which I would have about one-fifth of my readership.

“Walkabout with Montrose” is the work of a Crown Heights resident, adept with camera and keyboard, who styles herself Montrose Morris after the Renaissance Revival architect of the same name (active in Brooklyn in the late 19th century, he built the over-the-top Alhambra apartments on Nostrand Avenue, as well as the Renaissance, the Imperial, and other then-prestigious buildings).

Montrose trolls the streets of central Brooklyn with a sharp eye for architectural detail, amassing a body of invaluable documentation you won’t find in books.

The first in the series was ironwork on March 31, followed by terracotta on April 7, and my favorite so far, the esoteric and totally undocumented automobile row on April 14 — the great Art Deco showrooms and other auto-related businesses that sprouted on Bedford Avenue in the ‘teens and ’20s.

This week, on April 22, Montrose focused on brick; go here for the whole post.

Thanks, Montrose, for your scholarly contribution to Brooklyn’s rich architectural history, and for wearing out your shoe leather (or rubber soles, as it were) so the rest of us can benefit.

Charlie Tu believes these items will be hot in 2009!1

French Bulldogs: small enough to bring into M2M

California Style Garlic Salt: Who has the time to buy both?

FACEBOOK Groups for Foods You Eat When Drunk

Guide Ponies on Bedford Avenue.

____________________________________________________________

Photo of striped hipsteress by Lola Wakefield for Stuff Hipsters Don’t Like ©2008.

MANIAC KNOCKED OUT BY WOMAN SURGEON

Dr. Crawford Subdues Him with a Blow When He Attacks Her in Ambulance.

SHE NEVER LOST HER NERVE

When He Renewed the Struggle the Resourceful Surgeon Resorted to an Eye Trick.

Dr. Mary Crawford, the woman ambulance surgeon of the Williamsburg Hospital, for the second time since her connection with it had an encounter yesterday with a madman.

With a right had blow on the chin of her assailant she almost knocked him senseless.  The man was Michael Ford, a mechanic, whose address the police were unable to learn.

It was shortly after 1 o’clock yesterday afternoon when there was a call for an ambulance at North Eighth Street and Bedford Avenue.  Dr. Crawford found there a crowd of several hundred, in the centre of which were two policemen of the Bedford Avenue Station and several volunteers struggling with a madman.  She directed the policemen to hold the man while she gave him treatment.  This seemed to have a quieting effect, but only a few minutes.

With a yell Ford broke away from the policemen.  He was captured again and bound hand and foot with ropes.  The captive was then placed in the ambulance.  Dr. Crawford climbed in and Policeman Selvey jumped on the step.  On the way to the hospital Ford broke the ropes which bound him and suddenly attacked Dr. Crawford.  She landed on his chin with a right hand blow and Ford fell back in the ambulance.  As he did so he seized her by the throat before either Policeman Selvey or the ambulance driver, Hugh Gromley, could go to her assistance.  The doctor did not lose her nerve.  Pressing her thumbs under the man’s eyebrows, she stopped the blood circulation to his brain, and he gradually released his hold on her throat.

But when Dr. Crawford removed her thumbs from the madman’s eyes he renewed his attack on her and tried to throw her from the ambulance.  By this time Policeman Selvey and the driver, who had stopped the vehicle, seized the madman and rebound him.

While Dr. Crawford was at Cornell University she took part in the athletic games, and one of her pastimes is boxing.

Originally published on September 7, 1908 in the New York Times

Women at Cornell: The Myth of Equal Education (Cornell Paperbacks) by Charlotte Williams Conable

Doctors Wanted: No Women Need Apply: Sexual Barriers in the Medical Profession, 1835-1975 by Mary Roth Walsh

Elizabeth Blackwell: First Woman Doctor of Modern Times by Adele Glimm

Send Us a Lady Physician: Women Doctors in America, 1835-1920 by Ruth Abram

Click here for the link to download the audio track!

I am live-blogging on-stage at this pageant where the hipsters are in full-force!! They are intently watching me as I type into my blogging machine, though they appear to be baffled by its high-tech interface. I think, looking at this crowd… this is what Union Pool must be like. I have never been there before but if it’s anything like this I will have unlimited blog fodder for life! In fact, there are so many of them here that it reminds me of my first time at McCarren Park.

It was my second day in Williamsburg when I went to that magical screening of A Wet Hot American Summer, and couldn’t believe my eyes! I had never in my life seen so many hipsters in one location before, and was so mystified that I decided then and there to devote my spare time to studying them in their natural habitat of Williamsburg.

But now, in the ultimate twist of irony, the hipsters are studying me! They have already sized up my style and judged me as I awkwardly answered a series of interview questions. But IIII am the one who is supposed to be doing the judging here. Irony such as this it typically too much for hipsters to tolerate But at this caliber, even I am having trouble stomaching it.

Ugh! Why did I sign up for this? This judgment is one-hundred fold that which one encounters while walking down Bedford Avenue. And, the very fact that this is, indeed, a “pageant,” it’s stirring up memories that I’ve worked so hard up until this point to repress…

Should I disclose this information to this gang of blood thirsty hipsters?

I was 7 years old and for some reason – probably the barrels of Seventeen Magazines I was consuming at the time – I wanted to enter a local beauty pageant. I had never been in a pageant before and my mom, out of sadism or some desire to exclude me from the pageant world, let me pick out my own outfit,

WHICH WAS, a red coulotted number that had a large black collar covered with neon polka dots!

The hipsters are now eying me with jealousy that I owned such an item, or perhaps it is skepticism.

Perhaps they do not believe that my story is real.

Moments before my friend, hiding behind me, knocked over the entire row of trophies.

Oh yes. It was real. The only reason why I’m smiling in that picture though is because my mother strategically took it before the competition using the trophy as a prop.

I had one opponent in my age bracket, who was far more skilled in pageantry than myself – or had one of those overbearing, obsessed pageant mothers. My competition came onto the scene with the whole pageant getup. She had the poofy debutante gown, the high heels, the fancy updo, and of course, the Jean Benet Ramsey- style tramp makeup.

During the interview portion, I spent five full minutes telling the judges about my pet parakeet and firebelly newt, while my opponent talked to them about her extra credit work in school and, GOD.

I lost, of course. And perhaps it was that devastating blow to my confidence that pushed me towards my hipster fence-sitting ways.

Since that fateful day, I haven’t thought about entering another pageant, and I don’t know how I got finagled into being in this sideshow. But now I am the one with the poofy debutante gown and…(sniffle) all I can think about is how much I wish I had that red coulotte dress! If I had sported that in the street wear segment, this pageant would have been over. I think the hipsters in the audience would have tried to rip it from my very body so they could wear it out on Bedford Avenue. The judges would have had no choice but to crown me Miss Williamsburg!

But actually, I don’t care if I win. Only a hipster would actually want to win this, and – pft- I am not a hipster.

Whew. Done. Time to go drink all memories of this pageantry right back where they belong: in my subconscious. Ok, edit edit, any typos? Ha, of course not. I believe this post is ready to be published.

______________________________________________________________________

Monlogue performed live on stage at the Mr and Miss Williamsburg Pageant by Lola Wakefield.

Audio recording and editing by Maty Serwer, my roommate who stayed up all night making this with me and subsequently went to his grandmother’s funeral drunk.

As I was closing up shop after a long day’s work sitting around on Bedford Ave at 10pm tonight, I was shocked to see something that I never thought I would ever see: Hipsters assembling! On their own accord – they weren’t even tricked by advertising gimmicks or indie bands!

At first I wasn’t quite sure what was going on. There were hundreds of hipsters in the street walking alongside cop cars with flashing lights. My initial thought was that it was a parade, and the helicopter flying overhead was lighting the way as a good Samaritan effort. Like the fun parades where the cop cars and firetrucks sound their sirens real loud right before the old men in Kiwanis come out driving little cars and beauty pageant queens and the Mayor ride by in convertibles.

Well, if it was one of those parades I would have peaced out. But naturally, because I saw an abundance of hipsters, I followed the commotion right to the center.

After traveling all the way from Union Square, the hipsters had come to a halt at Bedford Avenue. Led by “Panda-monium,” the group who -get this- routinely assembles at “The Change You Want to See” building on Havemeyer, protestors (and hipsters who like costumes, woo!) attempted to relcaim the streets for the purposes of the people who live and play there as opposed to profit-seeking companies encouraging consumption. Dozens of Williamsburgers decked out in Panda masks (one even had a fluffy white belly) were leading protest chants about Pandas and, later on, police brutality.

Aside from the pandas though, there were at least 200 other people assembled around Bedford and N. 6th. I’m not really sure what made them stop there: Was that their destination or did they just get distracted by all the bars and hipster activities? I’ve heard some rumors of a police blockade, but I don’t know about that. I’m pretty sure the panda-hipster group decided that if there was going to be a showdown, the Bedford stretch, AKA the Hipster Embassy, was where it must be.

At first there were only a few cops actually standing in the street. They were telling people to get out of the street with the ol’ “we really want to stop you from assembling but can’t legitimately make you until back-up arrives, so for now just stop blocking traffic – also, I’m really a nice guy!” trick. One hipster was really fucking with him, to my amusement, first standing in front of cars trying to pass and then standing directly next to the officer pretending to join in chastising the other hipsters for dancing in the streets. He was pretty tolerant though… or outnumbered and waiting. Either/or.

Then back up arrived and they were really trying to make people get out of the street. Apparently, they didn’t get the Pandamonium flier! Otherwise they would have known that that was the whole point…

Surprisingly, people did get out of the street for the most part. I would have thought the hipsters would have been lunging at the cops in herds trying to get arrested to boost their street cred. But except for a few people trying to cross the street for various reasons (one of those reasons may be just ‘because,’ but whatever), the streets became relatively clear and everyone pooled on the sidewalks. But I guess the cops felt like it would be really lame or something to just stand around in the street and not make a show of anything when they were all dressed up and ready to go. (Note: Cops value street cred wayyy more than hipsters.) Clearly, the youth of Williamsburg was a dangerous force with their panda costumes, excessive standing on the sidewalk and chants that couldn’t even last for more than 5 rounds.

The last straw for the police was when a really good song came on a boom box that this guy was holding on his shoulder a few feet away from me. The cops must have known that something sinister was taking place because there were at least 10 people dancing to the music. Given that hipsters shun all forms of dancing in public, this must have signified that they were about to form some kind of revolt.

Then a cop grabbed the guy with the boom box by the back of his arm and yanked him into the street, pushing him to the ground and making him loose grip of the stereo. Now, I know that dancing is illegal and also a sin, but I think there was excessive force used in this situation. The stereo fell, batteries flying everywhere, and when a few of his friends picked it up, a woman cop angrily lunged for the boom box and tried to further dismantle it!

Seriously, when she did that, all I could think about was that scene in Disturbing Behavior when the creepy yet heroic janitor turns on the stereos and all the robot people freak out and attack them. I guess if music-playing devices to cops are pretty much the equivalent of WMDs, I can see why she tried to attack the boom box. She was unsuccessful though, as the dancing criminal’s friends battled it out of her grip.

I was also standing next to a girl who got tackled and possibly tased for sprinkling water on her friends. She didn’t get it on the cops at all, so I don’t understand what about this behavior provoked them to the point that one of them literally ran from the street to where she was standing up against a storefront, grabbed her by the collar and threw her into the street and pounced on her along with several other burly police officers. I mean, you could tell the people around her on the sidewalk were kind of like “Spraying water is more of a hot concert thing than a riot thing but whatever?” The only thing that cop might be able to plausibly say to justify arresting that girl is that he thought the water was actually lighter fluid and she was attempting to burn down the Pizza Place behind her Do the Right Thing-style. “It’s your turn now, mothafucka!”

One potentially good thing about the people getting arrested and brutalized for absurdity though is that approximately 45 people captured everything on video. The currently sad thing about that is that there is only one YouTube video posted of it as of now.

So what have the hipsters learned tonight?

A) Hipsters will assemble if a raucous street costume party is involved, regardless of if they understand that the motivation behind the assemblage is attacking their habits of consumption.

B) Police officers have ocular implants that compel them to crush musical machines.

and C) Hipsters will (probably) use their tendencies to excessively capture life in digital form instead of experiencing it directly to contribute to the public sphere of information… in a few days, or weeks. Maybe… if they feel like it.

________________________________________________________________________

Video by Frooze.

PS: Girl who got arrested, I have your Yankees hat if you want it! A police officer found it on the ground and threw it towards me after they dragged you away. I picked it up, put it on backwards, and gave him the finger.

***RECENTLY UPDATED***

The other day, I did something awful for which I will surely be shunned throughout Williamsburg:

I got hired.

Oh, it gets worse. I didn’t just get hired at any old dive bar or bodega – I was hired by a corporation in the financial district where I would work 9-5 shifts. At such an institution, the term “disposable income” might cease to be an intangible concept like “the real world” and “success.” (Note: especially for hipsters, these things are eternally intangible.)

I don’t know what made me apply with that temp agency in the first place. Hipsters characteristically abhor employment and having self-generated income, preferring instead to spend their days complaining about their lack of adhesion to the larger world outside their college bubbles. To be a genuine hipster, I should have embraced my inner insecurity and continued spending business hours searching craigslist job postings at the local internet cafe and sleeping in my windowless room. By joining Corporate America, my hipster dilemma would cease to be a dilemma.

But as I would learn going to my job interview, the worst part about being employed by a corporation is that you automatically become excommunicated from hipster social circles. This happens for many reasons, the most prominent of which is that you are forced to do something that is intolerable in a hipster’s mind: You must wear “corporate attire.”

It was on this day I realized that while hipsters will enthusiastically faux-grudgingly wear any combination of seemingly ridiculous or unfunctional clothing and walk down Bedford Avenue with pride (or at least with a “I know I’m hot but if you look at me again I will fucking kill you” ambiance), the one thing a hipster will not wear is a suit. They are also hesitant about anything that falls under the “corporate attire” category.

For example, here is a website that attempts to market corporate attire to hipster females:

This website attempt to lure its target audience by advertising with two things hipsters dislike: working and participating in "new trends." Perhaps they thought the irony would fool them into buying their merch?

As you can see, this company is trying to market it’s clothing to both the hipster and the corporate whore, but I anticipate their plan will fail due to the prominance of the “how to” section on their site. Hipsters would never buy anything from someone who is telling them how to do something, especially if that something is dressing like a yupster.

Walking down Havemeyer at 8:00 am (AM!!! Note: This is a hipster’s deepest REM sleep time), the streets were empty save a few hipsters in suits. If you think that the disposition of a hipster is generally distraught, seeing the agony on the faces of the few hipsters whoring themselves out to Corporate America, onlookers would surely assume they were on their way to a concentration camp.

Beyond being physically uncomfortable in the loose-fitting slacks, non-v-necked button-up shirts and other items of customary corporate garb, hipsters feel the utmost sense of embarassment while walking the streets of Williamsburg in such blasphemous clothing. As researchers have learned through in-depth interviews with corporate hipsters, this feeling can only be compared to what hipsters felt when were forced to walk the halls of their middle schools wearing parentally-purchased items that weren’t at all what the “cool” kids were wearing. As this crippling stage of development is known as the root of all the common hipster’s problems (and is therefore considered the inspiration for their pilgrimige to Williamsburg), the irony that these feelings should be rekindled in their place of solace is too much for the hipster to bear. To compensate, the corporate hipster then spends approximately 85% of his gross income on cocaine and Jack Daniels.

At my interview I was instantly hired and asked to come in for a background test the next morning. I left feeling desolate at the thought I would have to endure the hipster walk of shame every week day. I couldn’t even fathom what the walk home from the JMZ would be like, what with the hipsters awake and in full force. I resigned myself to taking comfort in that I would soon be home and could change into an empire-waisted plaid dress and flip flops.

****UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!****

Good news: By a stroke of luck I slept through my background check! I was deeply humbled by that extreme close call and have since vowed to never work anywhere where “corporate attire” is required. Or anywhere that I have to wake up at 7:30 am every day. Or anywhere with the word “Corporation” in its title.

That same day, I was hired on Bedford Avenue! When I walked in on my first day, my manager (who wears tight jeans and has hella tattoos) was smoking a cigarette outside while the front desk was unattended. Hence, my first official training exercise was “how to smoke cigarettes and stand around.” I go into work at 4pm and the only requirement is that I “try to be nice to people.” I’m making a full $10 and hour less than I would be at the corporation, but I can do whatever the fuck I want (which consists of blogging and drinking coffee)!

Expect great posts to come.

Over the past 10 years, the town of Williamsburg has become the latest magnet for high-income business people, driving property value and the cost of living way up for all, including local Puertorriqueño, black and hipster populations. As a result, crime is at an all-time high (note: I really can’t verify that statistically, but two people definitely got stabbed with machetes by a gang in the nabe recently.)

When asked if the victims were also gang members, a police officer stationed nearby the scene replied, “Nah, they were probably some kids from Oklahoma who started shit with the people who have lived here their whole lives.”

While hipsters have multiple tattoos and like to dress “hard,” they are not actually skilled with martial arts or weaponry. It is likely that in this case, and many other gentrification-driven acts of violence, hipsters have been wrongfully targeted and blamed by those in financial duress, who confused them with the corporate tools who work so much they don’t even have the opportunity to walk around the streets after 10 pm to get attacked.

If there is one thing hipsters hate more than being victims of violent crime, it is being confused with young professionals. I mean, they wear nothing but navy pantsuits and topsiders.

Thus, hipsters view gentrification as a serious issue.

Aside from being offended by mistaken associations, hipsters naturally clash with the corporate-attire wielding market researchers and investment bankers slowly filling the luxury condos and artist lofts. This is not necessarily because hipsters are morally opposed to the corrupt processes that these people willingly feed with their employment, but because their oblivion is soo ironic it hurts a hipster’s mind to think about. The whole point of living in an artsy slum is to be able to work 3 shifts a week at a shitty coffee shop and have money for rent, drugs and concert tickets. But the gentrifiers in Williamsburg work 40-hour weeks and listen to bands like Bon Jovi, missing out on the finer points of the location they are co-opting.

Kristen Reynolds, 24 who recently moved to Williamsburg from Portland and works at a local restaurant, put the situation nicely:

“I mean, why should I have to take out more money from my trust fund in order to be able to live near some professional stock loser? I would rather be mugged than hear Elton John through my wall.”

Torn between living in immediate danger and immediate wet-towelness, gentrification has forced the hipsters to retreat to the north, unofficially designating “red zones” where hipsters are ill-advised to live. These zones can be seen by this carefully rendered map:

As you can see, the only areas not vetoed by the hipster population are within a 3-block radius from the north side of Bedford Avenue, and maybe Soho.

Hipsters also do not like gentrification because some righteous hippies on city council are using it as an excuse to close McCarren Pool (and by close I mean spend millions of dollars to make it an actual pool again). See the third thing Hipsters Don’t Like for more on this.

__________________________________________________________________

Map editing by Lola Wakefield for Stuff Hipsters Don’t Like ©2008

Uploaded to Flickr by Give A Dam

Hipster: The Dead End of Western Civilization

“You’re not some club kid in New York in the nineties. This shit is so hipster!” – which sparks a bit of a catfight, causing me to beat a hasty retreat.

It’s the cover story of Adbusters this month, and it’s not just another article making fun of hipsters. Def worth a read, especially if you work in marketing.

“Take a stroll down the street in any major North American or European city and you’ll be sure to see a speckle of fashion-conscious twentysomethings hanging about and sporting a number of predictable stylistic trademarks: skinny jeans, cotton spandex leggings, fixed-gear bikes, vintage flannel, fake eyeglasses and a keffiyeh - initially sported by Jewish students and Western protesters to express solidarity with Palestinians, the keffiyeh has become a completely meaningless hipster cliché fashion accessory.”

Def add Australia to this list!

It used to be that one had to seek out what was cool..sure there were always sources to turn to for guidance, but are the days of pouring through a Vouge, running to the store and showing up to school the next day with that, “I love this dress sooo much, but is anyone/everyone else going to think so” gone by? Does anyone not have a clue what’s cool or what’s not when you can browse millions of websites telling you so? Or even better, no real need for browsing when you can have your RSS/subscription email/facebook app/friend feed do it for you!

“The dancers are too self-aware to let themselves feel any form of liberation; they shuffle along, shrugging themselves into oblivion.

Is self-awareness a trait that will be more and more ingrained in us and generations to come? Has the internet and our ‘virtual persona’ (how we represent ourselves online) made us more aware of how we present ourselves in real life? Since it could easily come back to haunt us via google cache/facebook photos, are we slowly self-regulating?

Skater, hiphop, indie, they are all wearing the same graphic hoodies, listening to Daft Punk and amalgamating into one giant, watered-down hipster. What happens when the counterculture becomes the mainstream and does this global homogenization mean the end of counterculture? Is this a reflection of a new ‘we are all connected’ generation?

“Hipsterdom is the first “counterculture” to be born under the advertising industry’s microscope, leaving it open to constant manipulation but also forcing its participants to continually shift their interests and affiliations. Less a subculture, the hipster is a consumer group – using their capital to purchase empty authenticity and rebellion. But the moment a trend, band, sound, style or feeling gains too much exposure, it is suddenly looked upon with disdain. Hipsters cannot afford to maintain any cultural loyalties or affiliations for fear they will lose relevance.”

no comment ☺

As some of you may know, my old computer decided to die on me, leaving me desolate and alone. Those days are now over and I’m back on-line! WOOT! I am so behind on ithinkyoureswell.com updates and this blog, it sucks. I made two updates to ithinkyoureswell.com a day ago so go check those out and the many more to come within the next few days. I can’t wait to just be back on top of things and back in the flow I had become accustomed too. My new computer is insane and fast as hell! Ha. Sony VAIO is pretty much my new lover. I don’t even like leaving it at home…I start to miss it when I’m away too long… Today I installed about 11,000 fonts and then preceded to look through about a fifth of them just too see some of what I had gotten. Most of them are pretty dope and stuff.

So the other day I went over to Beacon’s Closet a.k.a. Hipster Heaven and sold like 5 bags of my clothing, the stuff I wore when I was really fat, and got about 100 dollars from it and also a sick pair of old school NIKE hightops. My roommate sized them up and believes they are from the early 80s and then preceded to drool all over them. I love em’ they are too sick. I will take some pics of em soon, probably tomorrow.

HERE ARE THE LATEST UPDATES TO ITHINKYOURESWELL.COM:

Here are some random photo’s I have taken in the last month. I don’t usually put pictures up that aren’t party related or nightlife influenced, but I am turning a new leaf and will do so more frequently from now on.

Later nerds,
Antwan.

music: Andrew Bird – Scythian Empire

I love my friends a lot. That’s why it doesn’t bother me to put photos of them on my website or on this blog in compromising positions. Whether they be sneezing, biting their toenails, or sleeping in bad underwear. They are all good people, people you all should meet, and they are mine forever pretty much.

We go out to eat whenever we all have time, which is usually on Sundays, this summer isn’t nearly as exciting as the former as we do not get to see one another nearly as much as we’d like. When we do gather, I like to snap pictures of things that they do like eat. They hate it–I love it. WIN WIN!

ENJOY THE PICTURES.

These were taken after The McCarren Pool party last Sunday which featured the band, The Liars and the Fuck Buttons.
I took photos of the shows and the people there which will all be featured on the SESAC website at a later date so stay tuned. Also, my computer motherboard crashed so ithinkyoureswell.com will be at a slight standstill for about a week. Be patient people.

Later nerds,

Antwan

This just in…  MTV plans on shooting the 21st season of the Real World in Brooklyn, I pray that they do not come to Brooklyn Heights as you know all it can mean is more street closures for parking.  I would assume they would be shooting it in Williamsburg, but no official announcement has been made as to which part of Brooklyn it will be in.  Only if I get cast for the 21st season will it be ok.  MTV, feel free to contact me.

Update: Damn, I am good on my prediction! The 21st season of the Real World will indeed take place in Williamsburg. I don’t know how official this is, but I can make out that its somewhere on Bedford Avenue, but I cannot tell what the other cross street it.

Did you notice that I only posted once last week?

And only once the week before that, and the week before that, and the week before that? And that the posts really haven’t been about food?

Our friend Jack did.

On Friday nights we like to stop by the bar that used to be our neighborhood local when we lived in the Lower East Side. We go to catch-up with friends, drink beer and laugh, you know, the usual things people do at bars. My job keeps me late on Fridays, so Isaac gets time to play pool and chat and gossip before I get there. Last Friday, Jack turned to Isaac and said, “So, what have you guys been eating? Annie hasn’t been posting…”

I laughed and laughed when he told me this the next morning. It’s true. I had gone into a bit of a cooking slump right before Christmas. But boy, I was out of the gate fast and with gusto in the new year. The kitchen has been in heavy use and some truly spectacular stuff has been flowing out at a steady clip, but I seem to have lost all time management skills.

Case in point? This post. It’s at least a week late. But, it was held up for good reason. What’s the reason? Cartography.

A few weekends ago, Isaac and I went on an epic walk. We walked Bedford Avenue from start to finish (give or take a block or two). Bedford is considered by many to be the longest street entirely contained within the County of Kings, a fact gleaned from Barry Lewis on Thanksgiving. Once we learned that, we knew we had to walk its 10 miles.

We awoke two Saturdays ago to a glorious, warm January day. It was time. And so with coffee and bialys in hand, we rode the Q out to Sheepshead Bay, camera in tow. I got a little lost trying to get us from the subway station to Voorhies Avenue, the actual head of Bedford, so we started our trek at Avenue Y instead.

I know you’re all thinking, “Right, so you guys went on a walk, what do maps have to do with this?” Well… I made you one! Right here. Complete with pictures and captions. I think it puts the trek into a better context. And I did it because I love maps.

We have an entire hallway lined with them in the apartment, right outside the bathroom. They’re those antique reproduction posters of cities like Paris, London, Venice and New York that you can buy in any art store. I love to study them while I’m brushing my teeth. And since I have a penchant for reading slightly trashy historical novels, they often provide insight as to where the characters are living. And, since we’re going to Florence in two months, I’ve been studying that one especially hard.

But, enough about maps, back to the walk.

We stopped for a “light” lunch somewhere around the midpoint of the walk. The plan was to snack in the middle and to end our trek in Greenpoint with a great, steaming bowl of white borscht like Brooklynguy suggested. Alas. Balboa was too much for us. The curry chicken, oxtail and mac & cheese (Oh the mac & cheese! How have I never thought of eating my mac & cheese with curry sauce until that day?) were delicious and filling enough to carry us through. We wanted to stop for borscht, but it just wasn’t prudent.

But what we did discover is that the trip to Greenpoint is actually quite easy from Bay Ridge, so we’ll be going back Brooklynguy! Don’t you worry! And soon. I need to have a borscht-off of some sort this year, since I failed so miserably at the Great De-Beet 2008.

We were achy and sore when we got home, because no matter how many times you go to the gym, a ten mile walk is still a ten mile walk, especially when it’s ten miles on hard city sidewalks. So dinner was a modest affair. Pasta in a thrown together tomato sauce. But the next night? Oh delicious soup!

I’m beginning to think there’s such a thing as blogronicity. Two days before New Year’s Eve, as Isaac was in the kitchen cooking up his pot of cauliflower soup, I surfed over to Clumsy’s blog and found she had just made a cauliflower & leek soup. Monday morning as I was desperately trying to catch up on my interweb surfing, there she was again, with French onion soup, the meal I’d cooked the night before. I find it amusing how two people on two different coasts experiencing vastly different winters can crave the same thing. Funny.

So, in celebration of my new discovery, blogronicity, I’ll leave you with our recipes for the two soups, even though I know you’re just really here for the map.

Head below the jump for Isaac’s Cauliflower Soup and Annie’s French Onion Soup.

Isaac’s Cauliflower Soup a la Ripert

prep time: 20 minutes ~ cooking time: 1 1/2 hours spread out over two days

• 1 large head Cauliflower, washed and roughly chopped into florets
• 3 medium-sized Leeks, sliced into rings and well washed to remove sand
• about 6 cups Stock & Water to cover the cauliflower
• 1 large knob Butter
• 1 cup Goat’s Milk
• Salt & Pepper
• Bacon
• 1 Preserved Lemon, flesh removed, rind very, very, very finely minced
• a few sprigs fresh Dill

On the first day, cook the cauliflower and leeks in the stock and water until tender and reduced by about half. Turn off the heat and purée with a hand blender. Pour into a storage container and stash in the fridge overnight.

The next day, bring the soup to a light simmer over a medium flame. Add as much butter as you dare, then add a little more. Stir in the goat’s milk and season with salt & pepper (white pepper if you’ve got it).

Serve the soup in bowls garnished with a few pieces of bacon and allow each person to flavor their soup to taste with the preserved lemon and dill. Enjoy!

Adapted from A Return to Cooking by Eric Ripert and Michael Ruhlman.

Annie’s French Onion Soup

prep time: 15 minutes ~ cooking time: at least 1 hour

• Butter
• Olive Oil
• 6 Onions, not sweet, sliced
• 1/2 c. Cognac
• 6 c. or 1 1/2 quarts Beef Stock or a combination of water and Beef Better than Bullion
• 1 piece of Stale or Toasted Bread per person
• Cantal or Gruyère cheese, grated

In a medium sized stock pot add enough butter and olive oil in a half-and-half ratio to cover the bottom. Add the onions and cook slowly over a medium-low flame, covered, stirring frequently, until they are becoming deep golden brown. This can take quite some time, 20-30 minutes. The key thing is to take your time and allow the onions to caramelize naturally.

Remove the lid and raise the heat and cook, stirring very often to prevent sticking, until the onions are a deep mahogany color. Add the cognac and cook until almost completely evaporated. Add the stock and bring to a boil. Cook 15-30 minutes to allow the flavors to meld (the length of time really depends on how hungry you are, 15 minutes is sufficient, but if you’ve got time, why not?). Taste the soup and season generously with pepper. Salt is probably not necessary, but taste to make sure.

Preheat the broiler. Place a slice of bread in an oven-proof soup bowl for each person and place the bowls on a cookie sheet. Spoon the soup into each bowl and sprinkle generously with cheese. Carefully place the cookie sheet with the soup under the broiler and cook 2-5 minutes until the cheese is bubbly and golden delicious. Very, very carefully remove the cookie sheet from the broiler, turn off the broiler and carefully transport the bowls to the table. Eat with abandon. Enjoy!

Two weekends ago Isaac and I went for a walk.

A very long walk.

Almost the entire length of Bedford Avenue, give or take a block or two. Why? Because Bedford is either the longest or the second longest street contained entirely within the Borough of Kings (aka, Brooklyn). Who wouldn’t want to walk that?

Walking the length of Bedford Avenue takes you through every type of house, neighborhood and era imaginable. As cheesy as it may sound, it’s a walk through history.

For those not in Brooklyn or not able to take the walk, click on any photo for an annotated map of our amblings.