“Our Thought-life will be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives.” Bg Bk pg. 86

Ps 119:57-60
57 Thou art my portion, O LORD: I have said that I would keep thy words.
58 I intreated thy favour with my whole heart: be merciful unto me according to thy word.
59 I thought on my ways, and turned my feet unto thy testimonies.
60 I made haste, and delayed not to keep
thy commandments.
(KJV)

Abandon yourself to God as you understand God. Admit your faults to Him and to your fellows. Clear away the wreckage of your past. Give freely of what you find and join us. We shall be with you in the Fellowship of the Spirit, and you will surely meet some of us as you “TRUDGE” the Road of Happy Destiny.
May God bless you and keep you – until then. Bg. bk. pg 164

Joh_14:6 Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.

{ This is the Happy Road ~ Matthew chap 5 translated the word Blessed to calmly happy.}

Joh 14:12 Verily, verily, I say unto you, He that believeth on me, the works that I do shall he do also; and greater works than these shall he do; because I go unto my Father.

{ Definition of TRUDGE

intransitive verb
: to walk or march steadily and usually laboriously }
RARELY HAVE we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path. Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program,

Christ does not fail us, we do that on our own. We blind ourselves.

Joh 14:17 Even the Spirit of truth; whom the world cannot receive, because it seeth him not, neither knoweth him: but ye know him; for he dwelleth with you, and shall be in you.
Joh 14:18 I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you.
Joh 14:19 Yet a little while, and the world seeth me no more; but ye see me: because I live, ye shall live also.
Joh 14:20 At that day ye shall know that I am in my Father, and ye in me, and I in you.
Joh 14:21 He that hath my commandments, and keepeth them, he it is that loveth me: and he that loveth me shall be loved of my Father, and I will love him, and will manifest myself to him.

Praise the LORD for truth !

Mat_11:29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.
Gal_5:1 Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage.

Alcoholics Anonymous, Principles of. ( “Doing The Right Thing” )

BB p. 79 –
    Although these reparations take innumerable forms, there are some general principles which we find guiding. Reminding ourselves that we have decided to go to any lengths to “Find a Spiritual Experience”, we ask that we be given strength and direction to do the *RIGHT THING*, no matter what the personal consequences may be. We may lose our position or reputation or face jail, but we are willing. We have to be. We must not shrink at “Anything.
    Usually, however, other people are involved. Therefore, we are not to be the hasty and foolish martyr who would needlessly sacrifice others to ‘save himself’ from the alcoholic pit.

BB p. 87 –
    We usually conclude the period of meditation with a prayer that we be shown all through the day what our next step is to be, that we be given whatever we need to take care of such problems. We ask especially for ‘*Freedom from Self-Will*’, and are careful to make no request for ourselves only. We may ask for ourselves, however, if others will be helped. We are careful never to pray for our own ‘*Selfish Ends*’. Many of us have “Wasted a lot of time doing that and “It doesn’t work”. You can easily see why.
    If circumstances warrant, we ask our wives or friends to join us in morning meditation.> If we belong to a religious denomination which requires a definite morning devotion, we attend to that also<. If not members of religious bodies, we sometimes select and memorize a few set prayers which emphasize the “Principles” we have been discussing. There are many helpful books also. Suggestions about these may be >obtained from ones priest, minister, or rabbi<. ‘Be quick to see **where religious people are right**. Make use of what they offer.

 ABSI p. 103 – “ As Bill Sees It “(honesty, tolerance, and true love of man and God)

Principle Before Expediency
    Most of us thought good character was desirable. Obviously, good character was something one needed to get on with the business of being self- satisfied. With a *Proper Display* of honesty and morality, we’d stand a better chance of getting what we really wanted. But whenever we had to choose between character and comfort, character- building was lost in the dust of our chase after what we thought was happiness.
    Seldom did we look at character building as something desirable in itself. We never thought of making honesty, tolerance, and true love of man and God the *Daily Basis* of living.

<< << <<   >> >> >>

 Mat 6:11  Give us this day our *Daily Bread*.

 How to translate a right mental conviction into a *RIGHT* emotional result, and so into easy, Happy, and Good living, is the problem of life itself.

                                                                                                     Twelve and Twelve  pg. 71-2  *”Grapevine,  January 1958”*
              

ABSI p. 310 —  “ As Bill Sees It “(mutual trust)
Our entire A.A. program rests upon the principle of mutual trust. We trust God, we trust A.A., and we trust each other. Therefore, we trust our leaders in World Service. The “Right of Decision” that we offer them is not only the practical means by which they may act and lead effectively, but it is also the symbol of our implicit confidence.
               Twelve Concepts  p. 16

 Deu 6:18  And thou shalt do that which is *RIGHTR* and Good in the sight of the LORD: >That it may be well with thee<, and that thou mayest go in and possess the good land which the LORD sware unto thy fathers,

 Deu 32:4  He is the Rock, His work is *Perfect: for all His ways are judgment: a God of *Truth and without iniquity, just and *RIGHT is He.

 Psa 19:14  Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be *ACCEPTABLE* in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer.

 Isa 1:17  ‘Learn to *DO WELL*; seek judgment, relieve the oppressed, judge the fatherless, plead for the widow.

Rev_3:20 Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.

So Christ Jesus is knocking on the door of your mind ~

Step 12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs. Many of us exclaimed, “What an order! I can’t go through with it.” Do not be discouraged. No one among us has been able to maintain anything like perfect adherence to these principles. We are not saints. The point is, that we are willing to grow along spiritual lines.
Why would they say that ~ so we have Christ wanting to sup with us ~ lets see the meaning of that in the greek ~
G1172
δειπνέω
deipneō
dipe-neh’-o
From G1173; to dine, that is, TAKE THE PRINCIPLE ~

Alcoholics Anonymous: pg. 17
The tremendous FACT for every one of us is that we have discovered a common solution. We have a way out on which we can ABSOLUTELY agree, and upon which we can join in brotherly and harmonious action. This is the GREAT NEWS this book carries to those who suffer from alcoholism.

Eph 4:3 Endeavouring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.
Eph 4:4 There is one body, and one Spirit, even as ye are called in one hope of your calling;
Eph 4:5 One Lord, one faith, one baptism,
Eph 4:6 One God and Father of all, who is above all, and through all, and in you all.
Eph 4:7 But unto every one of us is given grace according to the measure of the gift of Christ.

Above all, he believed he had acquired such a profound knowledge of the inner workings of his mind and its hidden springs that relapse was unthinkable. Nevertheless, he was drunk in a short time. Bg bk pg. 26

Job_38:2 Who is this that darkeneth counsel by words without knowledge?

That would be the LORD asking that ?

Jer 17:5 Thus saith the LORD; Cursed be the man that trusteth in man, and maketh flesh his arm, and whose heart departeth from the LORD.

Bg Bk 13 Bills Story

There I humbly offered myself to God, as I then I understood Him, to do with me as He would. I placed myself UNRESERVEDLY under His CARE and DIRECTION.

Nah 1:7 The LORD is good, a strong hold in the day of trouble; and HE knoweth them that TRUST in HIM.
Psa 31:3 For thou art my Rock and my fortress; therefore for thy name’s sake lead me, and guide me.

Step 1
For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but to perform that which is good I find not. For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do. Now if I do that I would not, it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me. – Romans 7:18-20
Step 2
Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things [are] possible to him that believeth. And straightway the father of the child cried out, and said with tears, Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief. – Mark 9:23-24
Step 3
The LORD [is] my shepherd; I shall not want. He leadeth me beside the still waters. He restoreth my soul:he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou [art] with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever. – Psalm 23 (KJV)
Step 4
All the ways of a man [are] clean in his own eyes; but the LORD weigheth the spirits. Commit thy works unto the LORD, and thy thoughts shall be established. – Proverbs 16:2-3
Step 5
Confess [your] faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much. – James 5:16
Step 6
Wherefore gird up the loins of your mind, be sober, and hope to the end for the grace that is to be brought unto you at the revelation of Jesus Christ; As obedient children, not fashioning yourselves according to the former lusts in your ignorance: But as he which hath called you is holy, so be ye holy in all manner of conversation; Because it is written, Be ye holy; for I am holy. – 1 Peter 1:13-16
Step 7
I sought the LORD, and he heard me, and delivered me from all my fears.They looked unto him, and were lightened: and their faces were not ashamed. This poor man cried, and the LORD heard [him], and saved him out of all his troubles. – Psalm 34:4-6
Step 8
Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become [as] sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. And though I have [the gift of] prophecy, and understand all mysteries,and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed [the poor], and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing. Charity suffereth long, [and] is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things. Charity never faileth: but whether [there be] prophecies, they shall fail; whether [there be] tongues, they shall cease; whether [there be] knowledge, it shall vanish away. For we know in part, and we prophesy in part. But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away. When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things. For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known. And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these [is] charity. – I Corinthians 13
Step 9
Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift. – Matthew 5:23-24
Step 10
For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think [of himself] more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith. – Romans 12:3
Step 11
Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord [is] at hand. Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. – Phillipans 4:5-7
Step 12
Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven. – Matthew 5:16

It took a complete surrender of my life to the Master on my knees in a Episcopal church in Negaunee  Michigan (Way up North in da U.P.of Michigan) , I did that also in a treatment center to get an A in treatment and it did not work until I called out to the Great Physician to heal me from my obsession to drink and the behaviors that brought upon that obsession, This I did 8 years sober and a mental and spiritual mess!!! The North Congregational Church in St Johnsbury is a majestic home of faith and well worth the trip to step into and reaffirm your faith to the creator, 10 years ago I was able to do that!!I Ron Gilly” Gilmore – Kincheloe, MI.. upgilly@aol.com 

Submitted on 2013/04/16 at 5:51 am

Grape Vine Article Bill W. After 25 yrs Documents Christian Roots To the A.A. Program 1960

You can use the link Below.

Bill W. Articles After-Twenty-five-Years-March-1960 A.A. Grape Vine Documents Christian Roots

Exo 20:1 And God spake all these words, saying,
Exo 20:2 I am the LORD thy God, which have brought thee out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage.
Exo 20:3 Thou shalt have no other gods before me.

As we became subjects of King Alcohol Bg Bk. pg 151

Step 1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol – that our lives had become unmanageable.

Keep GOD 1st ~ HE is the only one that has the POWER to relieve us of our bondage ~ action and more action need to keep us out of it and to repair that relationship with HIM.

Our description of the alcoholic, the chapter to the agnostic, and our personal adventures before and after make clear three pertinent ideas:

(a) That we were alcoholic and could not manage our own lives.
(b) That probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism.
(c) That God could and would if He were sought.

*”The Spiritual life is not a theory”*. ~We have to live it.~ Unless ones family expresses a desire to live upon “Spiritual ‘Principles” we think we ought not to urge them. We should not talk incessantly to them about “Spiritual” matters. They will change in time. Our behavior will ‘Convince’ them more than our words.
( Side Note: Principles= (noun)
1. rule of conduct or action:)
2. fundamental truth or cause”)

Big Book p. 125 “The Family Afterward”
— ( avoid hurtful gossip)– “Tolerance”, and true “Love” of man and God
We families of Alcoholics Anonymous keep few skeletons in the closet. Everyone knows about the others’ alcoholic troubles. This is a condition which, in ordinary life, would produce untold grief; there might be scandalous gossip, laughter at the expense of other people, and a tendency to take advantage of intimate information. Among us, these are rare occurrences. We do talk about each other a great deal, but we almost invariably temper such talk by a *Spirit of Love* and *TOLERANCE*.

Another “Principle” we observe carefully is that we do not relate intimate experiences of another person unless we are sure he would approve. We find it better, when possible, to stick to our own stories.
ABSI p. 103 –As Bill Sees it- (“Honesty”, “Tolerance”, and true “Love” of man and God)
Principle Before Expediency.

Most of us thought good character was desirable. Obviously, good character was something one needed to get on with the business of being self- satisfied. With a proper display of honesty and morality, we’d stand a better chance of getting what we really wanted. But whenever we had to choose between character and comfort, ~Character- Building~ was lost in the dust of our chase after what we thought was happiness.

Seldom did we look at ~Character Building~ as something desirable in itself. We never thought of making ‘Honesty’, *TOLERANCE*, and true *LOVE* of man and God The ‘Daily basis of living.
<< << << >> >> >>
Rom 5:5 And hope maketh not ashamed; because the *LOVE* of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Spirit which is ‘Given unto us.

Zep 3:17 The LORD thy God in the midst of thee is ‘Mighty; He will save, He will rejoice over thee with Joy; He will rest in His love, He will joy over thee with singing.

Twelve and Twelve p. 71-2
Grapevine, January 1958
How to translate a right mental conviction into a right emotional result, and so into easy, happy, and good living, is the problem of life itself.

ABSI p. 158 –As Bill Sees it- (*Tolerance, love*, inclusiveness)
“We found that the ‘Principle’ of *TOLERANCE* and *love* had to be emphasized in actual practice. We can never say (or insinuate) to anyone that he must agree to our formula or be excommunicated. The atheist may stand up in an A.A. meeting still denying the Deity, “yet” reporting how vastly he has been changed in attitude and outlook. Much experience tells us he will presently ‘change his mind about God, {*”But nobody tells him he must do so”*}.

“In order to carry the ‘Principle’ of inclusiveness and *TOLERANCE* still further, we make no religious requirement of anyone. All people having an alcoholic problem who ‘Wish’ to get rid of it and so make a happy adjustment with the circumstances of their lives, become A.A. members by simply associating with us. Nothing but ‘Sincerity is needed. But we do not demand even this.

“In such an atmosphere the orthodox, the un- orthodox, and the unbeliever mix happily and usefully together. An opportunity for “Spiritual” growth is open to all.”
letter, 1940

Luk 8:15 But that on the good ground are they, which in an “Honest” and ‘Good heart, having heard the word, keep it, and bring forth fruit with “Patience”.

Psa 86:15 But thou, O Lord, art a God full of ‘Compassion, and ‘Gracious, ‘Longsuffering, and ‘Plenteous in ‘Mercy and ‘Truth.

(‘Definition for the word Tolerance’.)
1. a fair, objective, and permissive attitude toward those whose opinions, practices, race, religion,nationality, etc., differ from one’s own; freedom from bigotry.
2.
a fair, objective, and permissive attitude toward opinions and practices that differ from one’s own.
3.
interest in and concern for ideas, opinions, practices, etc., foreign to one’s own; a liberal, undogmatic view point.

Eph 4:22 That ye put off concerning the former conversation the old man, which is corrupt according to the deceitful lusts;
Eph 4:23 And be “Renewed in the “Spirit of your “Mind;
Eph 4:24 And that ye put on the “New man, which after God is created in righteousness and true holiness.

THE DOCTOR’S NIGHTMARE pg. xxv 4th edition

If you still think you are strong enough to beat the game alone, that is your affair. But if you really and truly want to quit drinking liquor for good and all, and sincerely feel that you must have some help, we know that we have an answer for you. It never fails, if you go about it with one *Half the Zeal* you have been in the habit of showing when you were getting another drink.
*” Your Heavenly Father will never let you down!”*
( Where do you think Dr.Bob got this Statement ? If you read the 4 Gospels you will Notice Jesus Never Called God, -God.. He always Called Him Father. Fact.)
Psa 21:13 Be thou exalted, “LORD”, in thine own strength: so will we sing and praise thy *:Power”*.

Joe and Charlie Big Book study – Recorded in 1998 Step 12  

The Original Joe & Charlie Big Book Talks Step 11  

.

(a) That we were alcoholic and could not manage our own lives.

(b) That probably no human power could have relieved our alcoholism.

(c ) That GOD could and would if HE were sought.
… Bg Bk pg 60

1 Sam 2:1-2
1 And Hannah prayed, and said, My heart rejoiceth in the LORD, mine horn is exalted in the LORD: my mouth is enlarged over mine enemies; because I rejoice in thy salvation.
2 There is none holy as the LORD: for there is none beside thee: neither is there any rock like our God.
3 Talk no more so exceeding proudly; let not arrogancy come out of your mouth: for the LORD is a God of knowledge, and by him actions are weighed.
4 The bows of the mighty men are broken, and they that stumbled are girded with strength.
5 They that were full have hired out themselves for bread; and they that were hungry ceased: so that the barren hath born seven; and she that hath many children is waxed feeble.
6 The LORD killeth, and maketh alive: he bringeth down to the grave, and bringeth up.
7 The LORD maketh poor, and maketh rich: he bringeth low, and lifteth up.
8 He raiseth up the poor out of the dust, and lifteth up the beggar from the dunghill, to set them among princes, and to make them inherit the throne of glory: for the pillars of the earth are the LORD’S, and he hath set the world upon them.
9 He will keep the feet of his saints, and the wicked shall be silent in darkness; for by strength shall no man prevail.
10 The adversaries of the LORD shall be broken to pieces; out of heaven shall he thunder upon them: the LORD shall judge the ends of the earth; and he shall give strength unto his king, and exalt the horn of his anointed.

Speaker meeting With Russell S. Step 1

.

A.A. Speaker Meeting With Russell S. Step 2 Unity,

BB p. 47 — (*”Willingness is Spiritual cornerstone”*)
 We needed to ask ourselves but one short question. “Do I now believe, or am I even willing to believe, that there is a Power greater than myself?” As soon as a man can say that he does believe, or is *”Willing to believe”*, we emphatically assure him that he is on his way. It has been repeatedly proven among us that upon this simple cornerstone a *Wonderfully effective “Spiritual” structure can be built.
 That was “Great news to us”, for we had assumed we could not make use of “Spiritual” principles unless we accepted many things on faith which seemed difficult to believe.

 Mat 26:41  Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the “Spirit” indeed is *”Willing”*, but the Flesh is weak.

2Co 8:12  For if there be first a *”Willing mind”*, it is accepted according to that a man hath, and not according to that he hath not.

 BB p. 570 –

 Most emphatically we wish to say that any alcoholic capable of honestly facing his problems in the light of our experience can recover, provided he does not close his mind to all “Spiritual” concepts. He can only be defeated by an attitude of intolerance or belligerent denial. We find that no one need have difficulty with the “Spirituality” of the program. *”Willingness”*, honesty and open mindedness are the “Essentials of recovery”. But these are indispensable.

Joh 6:63  It is the “Spirit” that quickeneth; the flesh profiteth nothing: the *Words* that I speak unto you, they are “Spirit”, and they are life.

1Th 5:6  Therefore let us not sleep, as do others; but let us watch and be *”Sober”*.
“There is a principle which is a bar against all information,
  which is proof against all arguments and which cannot fail to
  keep a man in everlasting ignorance–that principle is contempt
  prior to investigation.”
         –Herbert Spencer

Marcelle Wanzek Comment:

I am only commenting to let you be aware of of the fantastic encounter my cousin’s girl undergone studying your web blog. She mastered a good number of issues, which include how it is like to have a wonderful coaching style to make others with ease master various tortuous matters. You really exceeded my expected results. Thank you for rendering those priceless, healthy, revealing not to mention unique tips on that topic to Evelyn.

Reading through the book, I have learned that even though I had reduced my alcohol intake from when I was younger, I was still behaving very much like an alcoholic.  I treated my wife like shit, I was overbearing with my children and often quite rude to those I called my friends but treated as anything but.  There are many times I have cried while reading this book when I realized I was displaying many of these behaviors…  I wasn’t just an asshole, I was suffering from the disease of alcoholism as well.

I have hurt so many people in my life…  I am on the road to recovery but it is going to be a long hard journey.  I have made some good friends in the Halls and I know they are going to be there for me when I need the support.  I have a good sponsor who will be guiding me through the book and the steps and he is always there when I need someone to talk with.

I am becoming a new person, and I approve of him greatly.  He is more tolerant, patient and caring than he used to be.  I sincerely wish I could have experienced this a few years back so I could have saved my marriage, but past is past, I cannot afford to dwell on it anymore.  All I am allowed to do is live day-by-day and perhaps hold a few hopes for the future.

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AFTER the breaking up of our home, my Father went west and took up his work and became fairly successful.
Then it was decided that I should be sent to a preparatory school so to a midwestern school I was sent. It didn’t last long for I got into a jam and left.
I went to Chicago, wrote my Father and he sent me fare to come on west, which I did. I started in to High School after I got there, but I had no companionship, for my Father was away most of the day and when he came in he always spent the evenings reading and studying.
This all caused me to become very bitter towards anything religious, because I felt that I was only in his way when he wanted to read his religious books and he took only enough interest in me to leave a dollar on the dresser each morning to buy my meals with. It caused me to become so hostile towards anything religious that I formed a hatred against religion which I was to carry for years.
During the time which I spent by myself, I had found that I could buy wine and loaf around saloons and it wasn’t long before I had formed a taste for drink. I was only about fourteen years old then, but I looked eighteen.
When vacation time came I wanted to go to San

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The Rolling Stone
Francisco. My father willingly let me go and after seeing the sights of that city I decided I wanted to go to sea and see the world, so it was only a short time before I found myself signed as an apprentice at sea and leading a new life.
In the meantime my mother had married again. I knew she was well taken care of so my letters were few and my visits home were years apart, and through the selfish interest I had taken in myself I never gave a thought to how worried she might be over me. I had become a person wrapped up in my own life only and giving no thought of anyone else.
Starting to sea out of San Francisco brought me in and out of port there a great deal so I considered San Francisco my home, and as I had arrived there about 1905 I knew the old San Francisco of before the earthquake where the lid was off and vice flourished at all times.
In my young life I saw all and knew all and considered myself well able to play the game as others did.
I developed into a steady drinker and, when going to sea, was sure I took enough liquor along to take care of me for the trip. When we arrived at a foreign port we would go ashore and proceed to see the sights which mostly started at the first saloon. If American liquor was not to be had or was too high in cost then we would drink their native drink, and as I look back it hardly seems possible that I have a brain left to remember with for I have done about everything possible to destroy it by over-indulgence in alcohol.
I have been to most of the ports in this world; have

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stayed in some for some time; have put in a winter in Alaska; lived in the tropics; but no time did I ever find a place where I could not get liquor.
I quit the sea when I was just past 20. I had become interested in construction work, also had studied some art and learned the Freco decorating trade. Eventually I went into the building trade and have followed that ever since.
I had always made good wages or made good at contracting, but was ever a rolling stone, never staying in one place long and drinking just the same as in my seafaring days.
I had always a certain respect for myself and I carried my liquor well for years; knew enough not to make a show of myself and stopped when I had enough.
Then came the war. I was 29 years old and was in Texas when I went into the army and went overseas from there. After leaving Texas I found out that we were stopping in my home town for an hour and I received permission to call my mother when we arrived there, so fortunately I was able to get her down to the train before I left. I had not been home in 11 years and I then told her if I came back alive I would come home to stay.
I had not been in the service long before I was a high ranking non-commissioned officer, for I had learned army discipline years before in the army transport service and while in this country and when behind the lines in France this gave me a chance to get my liquor when my buddies couldn’t.
But when we got to the front lines it was the first

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time in years that I was unable to get my daily share of alcohol but, when it was possible, I never missed.
On into Germany for six months where I made up for lost time. “Schnapps” was barred to American Troops but I got mine. After coming back to the U.S. I received an honorable discharge and came back to my home and mother.
Then I started trying to break away from liquor but it did not last. The last few years found me in all kinds of mixups for I had at last developed into an alcoholic.
When I drank I would get to the state where it required a doctor to straighten me out. The times I have had to rely upon doctors are numerous. I even tried sanitariums for relief. I had plenty of suffering thrown in but still I would drift back again to that first drink and off again I went.
I wanted to quit but each time I drank it was worse than before. The misery that my mother went through was unbelievable for I had become her sole support. I was willing to try anything if I could only get a release from this curse. I knew it was breaking up my home and I was losing everyone that was dear to me.
For a few months I was successful in discontinuing drinking. Then all of a sudden I fell again. I lost my position and thought I was through.
When I was told of a doctor who had been successful in overcoming alcohol and was asked to go and see him in a nearby city, I consented but with a feeling that it was just another cure.
From him and a number of other men, however, I found it was possible to become a man again. He sug-

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Alcoholics Anonymous
gested my entrance into a hospital to clear my mind and build me up. Meals had become a thing of the past for me. I had lost all appetite for food but forced myself to eat a little to survive.
This doctor told me that unless I was sincere in wanting to quit drinking, I would be wasting his time and mine and also money in doing this. My answer was I would try anything that would release me.
I went into the hospital and started to build my body up again through proper nourishment, and my mind through a different method than I had ever known of.
A religious awakening was conveyed to me through some unseen force. I at one time would have laughed at such a possibility because I had tried it and failed because I had not applied it properly. I, at last, was shown the way by these men to whom I am now most grateful.
I am now 50 years old, unmarried, have become sane and sensible again, have made my mother happy and brought back those who were dear to me, have made many new friends, mix where I never mixed before, received back my old position. I have the respect of my fellow men and have learned how to actually live and really enjoy life. It has been nearly six and a half years since I have found this new life and I know as long as I do the few things that God requires me to do, I never will take another drink.

p.390

The following is a talk Bill gave to the American Psychiatric Association in 1949.

Alcoholics Anonymous is grateful for this invitation to appear before The American Psychiatric Association. It is a most happy circumstance. Being laymen

We have naught but a story to tell, hence the quite personal and unscientific character of this narrative. Whatever their deeper implications the attitudes and events leading to the formation of Alcoholics Anonymous are easy to portray.

Two alcoholics talk across a kitchen table. One is drinking, the other is not. Severe chronics, the threat of commitment hangs over both. The time is November 1934. The active drinker became, years later, the writer of this paper.

My sober visitor was an old friend and schoolmate, long catalogued by physicians and family as hopeless. I enjoyed the same rating and well knew it. My friend had arrived to tell me how he had been released from alcohol.

In truth, the quality of his sobriety seemed different. Having made contact with the Oxford Group, a nondenominational, evangelical movement, my friend had been specially impressed by an alcoholic he had met, a former patient of C. G. Jung.

Unsuccessfully treating this individual for a year, Dr. Jung had finally advised him to try religious conversion as his last chance. While disagreeing with many tenets of the Oxford Group, my former schoolmate did, however, ascribe his new sobriety to certain ideas that this alcoholic and other Oxford people had given him. The particular practices my friend had selected for himself were simple:

1. He admitted he was powerless to solve his own problem.
2. He got honest with himself as never before; made an examination of conscience.
3. He made a rigorous confession of his personal defects.
4. He surveyed his distorted relations with people, visiting them to make restitution.
5. He resolved to devote himself to helping others in need, without the usual demand for personal prestige or material gain.
6. By meditation he sought God *s direction for his life and help to practice these principles at all times.

This sounded pretty naive to me. Nevertheless my friend stuck to the plain tale of what had happened — no evangelizing. He related how practicing these precepts, his drinking had unaccountably stopped. Fear and isolation left and he had received considerable peace of mind. With no hard disciplines nor any great resolves, these attributes began to appear the moment he conformed. His release was a byproduct. Though sober but months, he felt he had a basic answer. Wisely avoiding any argument, he then took leave. The spark that was to become Alcoholics Anonymous had been struck.

What then did happen at the kitchen table? Perhaps this speculation were better left to medicine and religion. I confess I do not know. Possibly conversion will never be fully understood.

Looking outward from such an experience, I can only say with fidelity what seemed to happen. Yet something did happen that instantly changed the current of my life. I haven*t had a drink for over fourteen years. All else will be mere personal opinion — or just fancy.

My friend*s story had generated mixed emotions; I was drawn and revolted by turns. My solitary drinking went on, but I could not forget his visit.

Several themes coursed in my mind: First, that his evident state of release was strangely and immensely convincing. Second, that he had been pronounced hopeless by competent medicos. Third, that those age-old precepts, when transmitted by him, had struck me with great power. Fourth, that I could not, and would not, go along with any God concept. No conversion nonsense for me. Thus did I ponder. Trying to divert my thoughts, I found it no use.

By cords of understanding, suffering, and simple verity, another alcoholic had bound me to him. I shall not break away.

One morning after my gin a realization welled up. Who are you, I asked, to choose how you are going to get well? Beggars are not choosers. Suppose medicine said carcinoma was your trouble. You would not turn to Pond’s extract. In abject haste you would beg a doctor to kill those hellish cancer cells. If he didn’t stop them, and you thought conversion could, your pride would fly away. You would soon stand in public squares crying Amen along with other victims.

What difference then, I reflected, between you and the cancer victim? His sick body crumbles. Likewise your personality crumbles, your obsession consigns you to madness or the undertaker. Are you going to try your friends formula — or not?

Of course I did try. In December, 1934, I appeared at Towns Hospital, New York.

My old friend, Dr. W. D. Silkworth, shook his head. Soon free of sedation and alcohol, I felt horribly depressed. My alcoholic friend turned up. Though glad to see him, I shrank a little. I feared evangelism. Nothing of the sort happened. After small talk, I again asked him about the Oxford Groups.

Quietly, sanely enough, he told me, and then departed.

Lying there in conflict, I dropped into a black depression. Momentarily my prideful obstinacy was crushed. I cried out: Now I’m ready to do anything — anything to receive what my good friend has. Expecting naught, I made this frantic appeal: If there be a God, will he show himself!

The result was instant, electric, beyond description. The place lit up, blinding white. I knew only ecstasy and seemed on a mountain. A great wind blew, enveloping and permeating me. It was not of air, but of Spirit.

Blazing, came the tremendous thought, You are a free man! Then ecstasy subsided. Still on the bed I was now in another world of consciousness which was suffused by a Presence. One with the Universe, a great peace stole over me and I thought, So this is the God of the preachers; this is the Great Reality. But reason returned, my modern education took over.

Obviously I had gone crazy. I became terribly frightened.

Dr. Silkworth came in to hear my trembling account of the phenomenon. He assured me I was not mad; that I had perhaps undergone an experience which might solve my problems. Skeptical man of science he then was; this was most kind and astute. If he had said hallucination I might now be dead. To him I shall be eternally grateful.

Good fortune pursued me. Somebody brought a book entitled Varieties of Religious Experience and I devoured it. Written by James, the psychologist, it suggests that conversion can have objective reality. Conversion does alter motivation, and does semi-automatically enable a person to be and do the formerly impossible. Significant it was, that marked conversion experiences come mostly to individuals who know complete defeat in a controlling area.

The book certainly showed variety. But bright or dim, cataclysmic or gradual, theological or intellectual in bearing, such conversions did have common denominators, they did change utterly defeated people. And so declared William James. The shoe fitted. I have tried to wear it ever since. For drunks, the obvious answer was deflation at depth and more of it.

That seemed plain as a pikestaff. I had been trained as an engineer, so the views of this authoritative psychologist meant everything to me.

Armored now by utter conviction and fortified by my characteristic power drive, I took off to cure alcoholics wholesale. It was twin jet propulsion; difficulties meant nothing. The vast conceit of my project never occurred to me. I pressed my assault for six months; my home was filled with alcoholics.

Harangues with scores produced not the slightest result. None of them got it. Disappointingly, my friend of the kitchen table, who was sicker than I realized, took little interest in these other alcoholics. This fact may have caused his endless backslides later on. For I had found that working with alcoholics had a huge bearing on my own sobriety
.
But why wouldn’t any of my new prospects sober up?

Slowly the bugs came to light. Like a religious crank, I was obsessed with the idea that everybody must have a spiritual experience just like mine. I’d forgotten that there were many varieties. So my brother alcoholics just stared incredulously or kidded me about my hot flash. This had spoiled the potent identification so easy to get with them. I had turned evangelist.

Clearly the deal had to be streamlined. What came to me in six minutes might require six months in others.

It was to be learned that words are things, that one must be prudent. It was also certain that something ailed the deflationary technique. It definitely lacked wallop.

Reasoning that the alcoholic’s hex, or compulsion, must issue from some deep level, it followed that ego deflation must also go deep or else there couldn’t be any fundamental release. Apparently religious practice would not touch the alcoholic until his underlying situation was made ready. Fortunately all the tools were right at hand. You doctors supplied them.

The emphasis was straightway shifted from sin to sickness — the fatal malady, alcoholism. We quoted doctors that alcoholism was more lethal than cancer; that it consisted of an obsession of the mind coupled to increasing body sensitivity. These were our Twin Ogres of Madness and Death. We leaned heavily on Dr. Jung’s statement how hopeless the condition could be and then poured that devastating dose into every drunk within range. To modern man science is omnipotent; it is a god. Hence if science would pass a death sentence on the drunk, and we placed that verdict on our alcoholic transmission belt, it might shatter him completely. Perhaps he would then turn to the God of the theologian, there being no place else to go. Whatever the truth in this device, it certainly had practical merit. Immediately our whole atmosphere changed. Things began to look up.

Bankrupt at the time, I stumbled into a business venture. It took me to Akron, Ohio, where the deal quickly collapsed leaving me dispirited. Alone, I panicked in fear of getting drunk. This was something new for I realized that I hadn’t thought of drinking since the December 1934 experience. I could now see my peril clearly and thus brush off the usual rationalizations.

With relief, I perceived that my new spiritual conditioning really meant something now that the heat was on. But that didn’t stop the compulsive up rush of drinking desire. I needed to talk to another alcoholic, and quickly.

Shortly I was introduced to Dr. Robert S., a surgeon. He was an alcoholic in a bad way. This time there was no preachment from me. I told him my experience and what I thought I knew about alcoholism. Needing him as much as he did me, there was a genuine mutuality for the first time and, as we now say in A.A., he soon clicked never to drink again. That was June 1935. We began to spend long hours on drunks at a local hospital. One of them is sober yet, no relapse. Though nameless, the first A.A. Group had actually started. Dr. S. has since hospitalized some 4,000 cases at Akron. The bulk have recovered. All this too without a cent of monetary return to him. Thus he became co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous. As I left Akron in September 1935 three alcoholics were staying sober.

Arrived at New York, I set to work and another A.A. group took shape. But nothing was very sure; we still flew blind.

It was soon necessary to retire from the Oxford Group. The good people there had disapproved of us. For our purpose, the Oxford Group atmosphere wasn’t entirely right. Their demands for absolute moral rectitude encouraged guilt and rebellion. Either will get alcoholics drunk, and did. As nonalcoholic evangelists, they couldn’t understand that. Good friends these, we owed them much. From them we had learned what, and what not, to do.

Then commenced a 3 year season of trial and error eventuating in our textbook, Alcoholics Anonymous, published in 1939. That book, now backbone of our A.A. society, opens with a typical story of drinking and recovery. Next comes a chapter of hope, entitled There Is A Solution. In A.A. vernacular two chapters describe alcoholism and the alcoholic, their object being of course to first identify and then deflate. A chapter is devoted to softening up the agnostic.

This leads to the Twelve Steps of present-day Alcoholics Anonymous. The heart of our therapy, and a practical way of life, these Steps are little but an amplified and streamlined version of the principles enumerated by my friend of the kitchen table.

The balance of the text is mostly devoted to practical application of these Twelve Steps, and to reducing the inner resistance of the reader. Working with other alcoholics is very heavily emphasized. Chapters are devoted to wives, family relations, and employers. The final chapter pictures the new society and begs the recovered alcoholic to form a group himself. This ideology is then shored up by 30 case histories, or rather stories, written by A.A. members. These complete the identification and stir hope. The 400 pages of Alcoholics Anonymous contain no theory; they narrate experience only.

When the book appeared in April 1939, we had about 100 members. One-third of these had impressive sobriety records. The movement had spread to Cleveland and drifted toward Chicago and Detroit. In the East it inclined to Philadelphia and Washington. There was an extraordinary event at Cleveland.

The Plain Dealer published strong pieces about us backed by editorials. A barrage of telephone calls descended on 20 A.A. members, mostly new people.

A.A. book in hand, they took on all comers. New members worked with the still newer. Two years later, Cleveland had garnered by this chain reaction hundreds of new members.

The batting average was excellent. It was our first evidence that we might digest huge numbers rapidly.

Then came great national publicity. The Saturday Evening Post piece (March 1941) shot thousands of frantic inquiries into our tiny New York office.

This gave us lists of alcoholics in hundreds of cities. Business men traveling out of established A.A. centers used these names to start new groups. By sending literature and writing often, A.A. groups sprung up by mail. With no personal contact whatever, this was astounding. Clergy and medical men began to give their approval. I wish to say that Dr. Harry Tiebout, chairman of our discussion today, was the first psychiatrist ever to observe and befriend us. Alcoholics Anonymous mushroomed. The pioneering had ended. We were on the U.S. map.

As of 1949 our quantity results are these. The 14-year-old society of Alcoholics

Anonymous has 80,000 members in about 3,000 groups. We have entered into 30 foreign countries and U.S. possessions; translations are going forward. By occupation we are an accurate cross section of America. By religious affiliation we are about 40% Catholic; nominal and active Protestants, also many former agnostics, and a sprinkling of Jews comprise the remainder. Ten to 15% are women. Some Negroes are recovering without undue difficulty. Top medical and religious endorsements are almost universal. A.A. membership is pyramiding, chain style, at the rate of about 30% a year. During 1949, we expect 20,000 permanent recoveries, at least. Half of these will be medium or mild cases (average age about 36) a fairly recent development.

Of alcoholics who stay with us and really try, 50% get sober at once and stay that way, 25% do so after some relapses and the remainder usually show improvement. But many problem drinkers do quit A.A. after a brief contact, maybe three or four out of five. Some are too psychopathic or damaged. But the majority have powerful rationalizations yet to be broken down.

Eventually this does happen providing they get what A.A. calls a good exposure, on first contact. Alcohol then builds such a hot fire that they are finally driven back to us, often years later.

They tell us that they had to return; it was A.A, or else. They had learned about alcoholism from alcoholics; they were hit harder than they had known. Such cases leave us the agreeable impression that half our original exposures will eventually return, most of them to recover. So we just indoctrinate the newcomer.

We never evangelize; Barleycorn will look after that. The clergy declare we have capitalized the Devil. These claims are considerable but we think them conservative. The ultimate recovery rate will certainly be larger than once supposed.

Such is a glimpse of our origin, central therapeutic idea, and quantity result.

The qualitative result is assuredly too large a subject for this paper.

Alcoholics Anonymous is not a religious organization; there is no dogma. The one theological proposition is a Power greater than one*s self. Even this concept is forced on no one. The newcomer merely immerses himself in our society and tries the program as best he can. Left alone, he will surely report the gradual onset of a transforming experience, call it what he may.

Observers once thought A.A. could appeal only to the religiously susceptible.

Yet our membership includes a former member of the American Atheist Society and about 20,000 others almost as tough. The dying can become remarkably open minded. Of course we speak little of conversion nowadays because so many people really dread being God-bitten. But conversion, as broadly described by James, does seem to be our basic process; all other devices are but the foundation. When one alcoholic works with another, he but consolidates and sustains that essential experience.

The forces of anarchy, democracy, and dictatorship play impressive roles in the structure and containment of our society; Barleycorn the Tyrant Dictator is quite impersonal. But Hitler never did have a Gestapo half so effective. When the anarchy of the alcoholic faces his tyrant, that alcoholic must become a social animal or perish. Perforce, our society has settled for the purest kind of democracy.

Naturally, the explosive potential of our rather neurotic fellowship is enormous. As elsewhere, it gathers closely around those eternal provocateurs: power, money and sex. Throughout A.A. these subterranean volcanoes erupt at least a thousand times daily; explosions we now view with some humor, considerable magnanimity, and little fear at all. We think them valuable object lessons for development. Our deep kinship, the urgency of our mission, the need to abate our neurosis for contented survival; all these, together with love for God and man, have contained us in surprising unity. There seems safety in numbers.

Enough sand bags muffle any amount of dynamite. We think we are a pretty secure, happy family. Drop by any A.A. meeting for a look.

But, there isn’t the slightest evidence that violent neurosis, drunkenness, or lunacy is to be the destiny of Alcoholics Anonymous. Such dark forecasts have not materialized.

Many an alcoholic is now sent to A.A. by his own psychiatrist. Relieved of his drinking, he returns to the doctor a far easier subject. Practically every alcoholic’s wife has become, to a degree, his possessive mother. Most alcoholic women, if they still have a husband, live with a baffled father.

This sometimes spells trouble aplenty. We A.A’s certainly ought to know!

So, gentlemen, here is a big problem right up your alley.

Now to conclude: We of A.A. try to be aware that we may never touch but a segment of the total alcohol problem. We try to remember that our growing success may prove a heady wine; that our own resources will always be limited.

So then, will you men and women of medicine be our partners; physicians wielding well your invisible scalpels; workers all, in our common cause? We like to think Alcoholics Anonymous a middle ground between medicine and religion, the missing catalyst of a new synthesis. This to the end that the millions who still suffer may presently issue from their darkness into the light of day!

I am sure that none, attending this great Hall of Medicine will feel it untoward if I leave the last word to our silent partner, Religion:

God grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change, courage to change the things we can, and wisdom to know the difference.

# Read at the 105th Annual Meeting of the American Psychiatric Association, Montreal, Quebec, May 23-27, 1949.

The Original Joe & Charlie Talks, on The Tenth Step A.A.