Today was an interesting day for me at work.  The first thing I had to do was  run an errand with one of the other interns to pick up some gear for a shoot tomorrow.  There was a ton of stuff and camera equipment is not light.  That was okay, only because I actually had someone to talk to the whole time.  As soon as I got back my supervisor texted me and asked me to meet her and a few other coworkers, at a storage unit place.  So I headed back out and met up with her and the other people I work with in the office.  We moved one of the cast members belongings into a storage unit, because we are looking for a new place for her.  They pretty much called me in to do heavy lifting, fun stuff, not.  When we got back to the office my computer was being used by someone else, so I had to go and sit at the front desk with another one of the interns, which was fine because I like to talk with him.  It was a busy day and one that was filled with interacting with others.

Although I was used as a lifting machine most of the day, because I’m so big and strong, I was happy.  I was able to talk to different coworkers in situations that I have not been able to before.  When you are in the office you make small talk with people, but that’s usually about it.  Today I was able to get to know the people that I work with much better and only because we were out of the office setting, and free to talk about whatever we wanted.  I learned about peoples apartments, significant others, their interests, and much more.  I feel like I actually know these people now, and its all because I got to spend a little more personal time with them.  They actually have lives outside of work.  It is always easier to work with someone when you can get an idea of where they are coming from.  It makes talking to them, and interacting with them more enjoyable.  I hope you all can get an idea where I am coming from as The New York Intern.

My brother and I. He drove down four hours just to see me

Bill bought me a gorgeous Kate Spade cross body bag. It’s perfect for nights out.

Dessert at The Melting Pot. I love chocolate fondue.

My sunflowers!

A friend has a few more pictures of me. I got so many awesome gifts too. Maybe I’ll post everything tomorrow.

Stay Hungry!

Xx Steffanni

I am not sure if I have written about this before, but my father-in-law is not well. Hasn’t been for years. And every once in a while we get the call to go to the hospital to see him right away, because he won’t be alive much longer. The last time we got this call was on My son’s 18th birthday back in March, until the other day. He is back in there and on life support. We have been in every day except today, but there hasn’t been any changes. The poor guy looks awful. If he doesn’t make some improvement in the next couple of days, they say they will “pull the plug” on him. I feel so bad for him and the entire family. Everyone has been through so much for so long. Of course we all love to see him come out of his coma and begin to make progress again, but how many times can an unhealthy person do this? How many times can the family do this? Anyway, we will be back at the hospital tomorrow to see him. It seemed strange not going in today. But the entire family showed up for my sons graduation.

So many mixed emotions for this mamma today. My baby graduated!!! We have all worked so hard to get him here. I am so very proud of him. He is such a good kid, well, young man.

I may have been an emotional wreck today, but in every single picture of me I have this grin from ear to ear. As sad as I was, I couldn’t have been any prouder of my son and my entire family.

I hope you all had a great weekend, and I hope to get back to writing daily when things settle down with my husbands dad. Good night every one.

Anyway, I tried to stay awake to see the Celtics playoff game and they ended up in over time. Thankfully they won, but by then I was exhausted.

I have been super busy taking on all kinds of writing jobs. Things are crazy but I am finally starting to build a small, but very helpful income. I hope it all keeps up and the income builds.

Other than that my life has been pretty normal. Everyone seems to be feeling well. My son is graduating on Sunday. I can’t even believe it.

We are still trying pull plans together for his party. The girls party was a great success and I hope his is at least comparable.

Well, I am done for now. I hope you all have a great night!!

I already had three more articles to write for Fiverr and now I started getting hits on the new site. I made $66.00 today with a $75.00 order pending. Really? This is nuts. What is wrong with these people? Who pays that much just to have something written? Granted, the $75.00 one is a few days worth of work, but it still isn’t anything major. I can still do everything I am now plus that.

I kind of like the variety of stuff that comes from these off the wall sites. Keeps things interesting and I am learning a lot. Of course, these sites are like all of the other ones where you have to wait almost a month to get your money. But as I see it, next month I will have a little bit of money for at least a couple of weeks so far. I hope this keeps up and picks up!

I do have a question for you all. Have any of you ever written ebooks? I saw those on-line today too and wondered about them. I never have and I didn’t look into them, but I was just curious if they were worth the time.

I am exhausted and getting ready to sign off for the night. I hope you all have a great evening!!

Very strange things happened today directly due to that Father’s Day poem. My parents are a little different from I am when it comes to raising kids. I did not grow up hearing “I love you” or with hugs and all of that. Where as I smother my kids and husband with hugs, kisses and “I love you’s” all day long. I can’t say it or show it enough.  Over compensating? Most likely. But they will never wonder in their adult life if I loved them or not.

So today my mom and step father came home from camp (just for the night) and while I was out mowing the lawn I had three missed calls from my step father. So instead of calling him back I stopped in there on my way home from the bank (I got another check from my work today).

It was odd. My step dad seemed different. Almost awkward. I didn’t think anything of it and after visiting for a minute, I left to come back home.

Five minutes later my husband brings me the phone. It was him. And again he sounded awkward. But he said that he read my Father’s Day poem and loved it. He thanked me and told me how much he appreciated it. I was just like, oh good. I am glad you liked it! Now I was being awkward.

So then I was listening to my voice mails that he had left earlier in the day and do you all want to know what he said on there? He asked me to call him, let me know that they were home from camp for the night and then he said those words that I have NEVER heard come out of his mouth. “I Love You”. To me, on my voice-mail.

I don’t even know what to think. I mean, I know he loves me and I love him. He has raised me since I was like five or so. But this is not what we do. We don’t show affection. Me, the most loving person in the world to my kids, husband, nieces and nephews do not know how to handle this. It is weird to me.

I just started saying I love you to my mom since I have been sick I think. It has always been this way. I have my mom and Larry. Not dad or anything sentimental. I love my in-laws but I also call them by their names not mom and dad. I love them dearly, and do not mean anything by it, it is just how I was raised and how I am.

What is wrong with me? What do I do if he says it to my face? I would have to say it back and for some reason this is really weirding me out. My in-laws used to be offended when I didn’t call them mom and dad, but when I still wouldn’t, they just accepted it I guess. But that freaked me out too. They are not just words to me. I don’t throw them around like candy, I need to mean it. And that is the strangest part. I love all of them!!!

So, I am not really in a dilemma or anything. But my next few visits will be a bit awkward at the very least. Blogging is really pointing out all of my flaws. ha ha You guys all know more about my feeling than my own family. And my family already knows that I am a little “off” sometimes. lol

Well, I am done for tonight. I can’t seem to stay awake and it is only 7:30. Have a great night everyone!!

When I read it I see the truth. And I still think that the ones that are offended are most likely the guilty ones. I hate to smother all of you with another article, but I am posting it here and if you all could just read it and let me know what you think? I have a lot of respect for your opinions. http://voices.yahoo.com/a-poem-all-step-dads-fathers-day-11384186.html

If I think about it, I would not have written it if my dad was still alive, because yes, it would have hurt his feelings and I do not like intentionally hurting anyone. But it is still true and I can’t even count how many times he had hurt me. Which doesn’t make it right. I am confused. Apparently I write my true feelings and I guess that is not always a good thing. Should I stop writing or is writing with your heart a good thing? I love it, I really do. And this poem did make my step father just glow. He was so proud. I didn’t see his face when my mom read it to him, but she described it to me. She said it was priceless.

Well, I guess I will continue on the way I am and just try to be more careful. I really don’t like controversy. Your feedback will help me a lot. You guys make me look outside of the box and that is a good thing.

I am off to bed for tonight. I hope you all sleep well.

But today has been cool enough outside that it wouldn’t be too bad without fans, but not having the internet would drive me crazy!! Our power just flashed though. Then we unplugged the internet box and the big tv just to be safe through the worse part of it.

I can hear it coming back though, so I will make this short. I am still pretty tired anyway. But one of these days I need to vent about a few things. Nothing major, just annoying and unnecessary. But that will be another day. I hope you all have a great night!!

But the weather was great, everyone felt pretty good and my mood stayed up!! I was still very tired but having my head actually feel good has been a bonus.

I came home to over two hundred emails!! OMG!! But I weeded through them and discovered that two more of my articles were published while I was gone and my doctor emailed me to let me know that my potassium was low and she was putting me back on potassium tablets and re-checking my levels in three weeks.Do you think that may have been sparked by a phone call from my psychiatrist? I think so.

Oh I almost forgot to tell you what happened to my son Friday night, our first night at camp.Well, as most of you know, he has multiple concussions and was just cleared on Thursday to resume normal activity as tolerated. We were in the camper making his bed up and this random bar just popped off the board that was screwed in with FOUR screws (screws went flying everywhere) and the bar snapped down and slammed him right in the back of the head. I was standing right there and could do nothing. It happened so fast. I held my breath and he just fell to the bed holding his head. I just stood there. Finally he sat up and said oh mom that really hurt. I just stared waiting to see his eyes roll into the back of his head. But they didn’t. He rubbed his head for a minute and said that it was feeling better. Thank God!!! The bar hit low enough on his head that it didn’t cause another concussion. He ended up feeling great all weekend and even took a four-wheeler ride with his uncle all the way to the Canadian border. A small headache that night, from being in the sun and possibly the vibrations of the ride, but he was fine other than that. What good news this is for all of us!!

Now my goal when I go to Jackman is to see how many moose I can find. And the past couple of years has been very grim, for me anyway. The rest of my family sees all kinds of wildlife, but I never seem to anymore. So I was very excited when we were driving home and my hubby spotted one in this marshy area and I was able to take pictures. I don’t think my camera zoomed in enough for you all to see it but it is there. ha ha

There really is a moose in this picture

The same moose

Then a half mile after we saw this one, we saw a little baby moose lying on the side of the road. It was so sad. We called 911 to let them know. The guy thought it had been reported, but he would let them know so they could go get it out of there. I know this sounds awful, but even though it wasn’t alive, I wanted to take a picture anyway. It was just a baby and I am not sure what I was thinking, but hubby said no because that was a little morbid. I agreed, I guess it was.

So anyway, I am home now and I am extremely tired. Way too much fresh air for me. just kidding. But it did wipe me out. So I hope you all have a great night.

Today was good for me too. More articles got published and I felt good – even went out to Margarita’s for dinner with my girlfriend. We had a great time. I really miss doing stuff like that!

Hubby had a very bad day today, and that makes me feel bad that I was feeling so good. But he is sleeping now and hopefully will feel better tomorrow. Camp will really stink if he can’t move. Let’s just hope he feels better.

So unless I get to jump on the laptop before we leave tomorrow then I won’t be blogging again until Monday night. I am not sure how I will be able to handle being out of the loop for that long. When I go up for two weeks I will bring it and take a drive to find service every other day or so. But not just for the weekend.

I hope you all have a great long weekend!! Stay safe!!! I will be a whole year older by the time I get back. ha ha Have a great night all!!

Good news: Yahoo! finally published my short story about my dogs!!

Better news: I am getting like a million rave reviews on it from my friends!! Like, not a million, but a whole lot more than I expected. I had never written a short story before so I am in shock right now. I am adding a link (ya ya again) to it just in case you are curious.

http://voices.yahoo.com/a-dogs-life-11375902.html?cat=44

Ok so are you all ready for the next part?

Great news: I saw my psychiatrist today (first time since my little episodes) and he looked at my records and asked me questions and said that it was NOT conversion disorder!!!!!!! Ok so it even gets better from there – he also explained to me in great detail about my having a long history of low potassium along with my issue with my blood pressure, the three days without my diuretic (and was finally taken within an hour before my first episode) and how that Tuesday was so amazing, which in turn landed me with another episode on Wednesday, then all of the muscle weakness and all of that was caused by my FLUCTUATION of POTASSIUM!!!!! My body is not regulating it naturally. Too low or too high. He was calling my doctor to “discuss” what he thinks. Either way he was pretty sure it was not conversion!!!

Ok, can you handle a little more good news from me today? While I was at the hospital getting blood work done today, I was talking to the financial/registration office and not only do I qualify for medical coverage through them (which is great, even though my doctor and my psychiatrist are not included under that umbrella) but they think that I will be eligible to get my Mainecare back.

Wait wait wait – a little more?? When I got home and checked the mail guess what was in there? First thing was a letter stating that as of May 17th I have my Mainecare back!? (confusing since my psych went into the Mainecare system today and it said I did not have it) But it was still good to see. And last but not least: There was a check in the mail with my name on it for $292.00!!!! It was from the Sate of Maine (my old job) saying that I had over paid on my dental and medical insurance at some point. Really? I haven’t paid anything in a year. Well, maybe it was from when I tried to go back to work in October, and of course only made it a few days, but that may be when it happened. Either way, I don’t care!! I went right to the bank and was going to deposit it all to pay my electric bill next week, but my daughter called and asked to borrow it so she and her boyfriend could come camping with us this weekend. And of course I want her to be there so I agreed. She gets paid next Friday and I know she will give it right back. No worries.

So what do you think? Not a bad day huh? I think I am still on cloud 9 from it all. The Celtics are playing and I haven’t even been able to concentrate on it at all.

I better call it a night. My son has an early appointment in the morning. Have a great night all!!

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I Write Articles For Two Large Websites.

Come Check Them Out – Follow Me or Subscribe (it is free)

Examiner.com – Readfield Mentor Examiner (relationships)

http://www.examiner.com/mentoring-in-portland-me/angela-godbout

Yahoo! – Yahoo Contributor (articles or stories of your choice)

http://contributor.yahoo.com/user/1590342/angela_godbout.html

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lol except for not quite so large. Nothing in Yahoo has been published yet. Not sure how long that takes. But I hope they hurry. I need money.

Today has been a great day. I seem to be feeling better and better all of the time. I have cut back on coffee, and am trying to eat a little better. Baby steps for now. I even took a walk around the yard the other day. That felt good. When the rain stops I will try it again. Although we may be at camp by then. But I will try to walk a little bit there too.

I really can’t wait to be completely back on my feet, and I feel like this is a good start. I want it so bad. I want to work. I want to feel free again. Instead of a prisoner in my own room/house. The unfortunate thing is that I am the prisoner and the guard. But I feel like I am making progress so I am happy with that.

Two things I want to add before calling it a night. First, my niece that we raised? Well she is pregnant. Did I already tell you that? I was kind of waiting for her to get over the first trimester. She came to visit the other day and she has a little baby bump. So very cute.

Second, do you remember my nephew that lost his mom a few weeks ago? Well, his aunt that he is living with is now calling, texting and Facebook message me and my two nieces. About trying to track down my brother for him to sign that paper. I told her that I have no idea where he is or what he is doing so she started on the girls. And saying stuff like she can’t get his SS check until she gets legal rights over him. And that we are just hurting my nephew by not giving her the info. Well, I very nicely asked her not to upset my girls like that again and insinuate that they are lying to her. I was so angry. I mean, I know something needs to be done, but come on. I raised my niece without one cent from anyone and she has more money  than I ever had. She is just irritating me so much. And now the way my nephew talks to me it almost sounds like he is brain washed. I don’t know what to do. After Memorial weekend we will have him for the next couple of weekends straight, and then hopefully for at least a couple of weeks once school is out. But there really is not a whole lot I can say to him without him getting defensive or upset. What is she doing to my boy?

I am off for now. Have a good night all.

I hope the links work so you all can check them out if you are interested. It is free for you and I actually get paid by you looking at them and reading them. Not a bad deal.

I also have sent in two articles to Yahoo and one short story. But those are not published yet. The short story was harder than I thought it would be. I think my attention span is meant for articles. 300 to 500 words or so, but a short story is like 3000 words. It took me all day to write it. And it wasn’t like I had to or anything. It was in the topics that they pick that I can choose from and you get paid just a little more for them, if they publish them.

I think my short story is cute though. It had to be humorous and fiction. So I wrote about my dog’s. Lol I can’t wait for my kids to read it. I am making them wait until it is published so I can get paid for them to read it. I got to do what I got to do.

So it was another hot day today. I spent most of it writing anyway, but I am still feeling pretty good. But I usually do when I stay focused on something. I hope this lasts.

My sons headaches have started to let up. Which is a very good sign. He may get back to school after all. I hope he does. Graduating with his friends means a lot to him.

Well, I am off to bed for the night. I hope you all have a great night.

If there aren’t any pictures did it really happen? 

This weekend was my birthday weekend!! And it was maybe the best one in 25 years!  However it would seem that I didn’t manage to take pictures of anything from my bright yellow skirt to the karaoke shenanagins on Friday night and the awesome Ingrid Michaelson concert on Saturday night. So here are the few that I did manage to get of our delicious bbq for Saturday night dinner (and some other bits)! I’ve said it a million times already but I’m so thankful for my Philly family making it such a great weekend!!

Like I said before Mike and I decided to go up north to Burlington, Vermont this weekend for my birthday. Since both of my sisters go to school in Vermont I thought it would be a ton of fun to go up and visit them and I was right! I just wish the temperature had been a little bit warmer, a few weeks ago it was 85 degrees in Burlington but last weekend the temperature didn’t get above 40. What can you do, crazy New England weather!

We got to Burlington on Friday afternoon and after picking up my sisters we went to go check in at our hotel. We stayed at the Hilton which was right on the water and had a beautiful view! After some menu searching we decided to do a late dinner at a really amazing Chinese restaurant, A Single Pebble, so that we could walk around Burlington and do a little bit of shopping on Church street. It is amazing how much Burlington is tailored to college students, the city is so easy to navigate and a very short walk from UVM College. If I could handle the cold a little bit better I could have really seen myself enjoying going to school there.

I wasn’t really in blogger mode at all on Friday since it was my birthday and I was really excited to see my sisters so I barely took any photos. You will just have to take my word for it when I say the dinner was amazing, and my sisters gluten/dairy free birthday cake was delicious

The next morning we headed off early to a local farmers market. The market was still inside because of the temperature but was going to be moving on out in the next week or so. For an indoor market it sure did have a lot of options though! I had a really fun time walking around, checking out all the local stands, and sampling pretty much everything I could.

Around noon on Saturday we took off for a fun tour of Stowe, Vermont and a few other great stops along the way. Stay tuned for that re-cap coming up tomorrow!

I like all living things, for the most part (insects are NOT my thing).  But, I didn’t like this bird very much!  He was a jerk.  This was another one of our daily journey’s on Spencer’s birthday weekend.  We made a stop at Ambleside Park in North Vancouver.  It’s a nice beach and park to go to and there is a lot to see.  The beach, the ocean, the park, the pond full of ducks!!  Yes, I said ducks.  I love ducks, so we went over to the pond to watch them swim.  On our way over, we had to cross over a grassy field, which happened to be full of geese and crows.  Gross!  Goose poop!  I also noticed the tree in the photo I’m including with this post.  It was FULL of crows!!  So, of course, as we were walking over the grass to the pond the birds and geese started flying away.  All, except this one crow.  He was mean!!  He squawked at us like there was no tomorrow and refused to leave that tree.  He was ‘beaking off’ at my kids big time.  I told him to ‘shut-up’! (As if he would) But he did so I quickly grabbed the camera and snapped this shot.  Look at the way he’s glaring at me sideways!!!  What an ‘Angry Bird’.

We went to this great Thai restaurant. The food was amazing, all the veggies in attendance could eat meat-free, and it wasn’t too expensive. I shall definitely come here again. But even though it was a great meal, this is where the trouble begins. Wine. We had wine with dinner. Lots of it.

Then we went to the pub and started on the shots. And from there we ended up at a club and had more shots. Then we stumbled home at about 4am and drank some more.

I vaguely remember having a good time. I remember chatting to some guy I’d met previously – he might have been the birthday boy at that dinner we went to in Broughty Ferry. Or, he might have been… Oh, I don’t know who he was. He wasn’t at Pete’s birthday-dinner, and only arrived when we got to the pub, so by that time I was already half gone. But he kept talking about my ‘boyfriend’, and at one point even said, ‘It’s unusual holiday romances work out. You two are a lovely success story.’ I was a bit bleary-eyed, and I got a bit confused and blurted, ‘Yes, but he’s not gotten a divorce yet. So I don’t know where that leaves us.’ To which the guy says, ‘Pete’s married?’ 

This shook me, momentarily, out of my drunken stupor enough to realise my faux pas. So I answered, ‘What? Pete’s not married? What are you talking about?’ and I wandered over to the bar. Yeah, I think I covered that one well.

Finally, after finishing off a post-going-out bottle of wine in the flat, everyone went home. I crawled into bed, and Pete lay down beside me. I fell asleep for a moment, and woke up to Fife kissing me. He was running his hand up my leg, kissing my neck. I kissed him back and pushed my hand down his front. I opened my eyes for a moment and saw my familiar room.

Shit! This wasn’t Fife.

I sprung out of bed, with Pete asking what was wrong. I had to think of something quickly, ‘I’m sick. I think I’m going to be sick…’ And I ran to the bathroom. The funny thing was that I got to the bathroom and was actually sick. Very sick. 

I came back to bed and lied down. Pete lay next to me stroking my hair, and I remembered why I first fell for him. He is actually a good guy. A bit gormless, and very clueless. But a good guy. It’s a shame that things haven’t worked out for us, but I’m sure he’ll find someone better suited to his ridiculous ways. Maybe PoshPhD will take him for me.

• 3 apples
• 4 oz lean pork chop
• 3 oz scallops with brussel sprouts and bok choy
• 3 spears asparagus
• (sigh) 3 pieces chocolate
• 1 hour tae kwon do
• 50 oz water

The chocolate I ate was the last of the temptations, and had a good workout.  Tomorrow I will focus on staying focused on protein and veggies only.  I am weaning myself off the carb, sugar and dairy.

Now, If I can go a few days without all the bad stuff I should be back in business. And my goal is to be at a decent weight in 4 weeks – spring break.  By decent, I will accept back where my low was before, but I would prefer a bit lower.  Really just 5 pounds in those weeks and I will be a happy camper. I am not sure where I really am today – I know my puffy weight – from all the crud I ate on my  birthday yesterday- but I will use whatever I am tomorrow morning as my starting weight.
Sigh, here we go again…

It’s official.

The countdown is finally coming to a close as Masquerade Motel and Ultra are finally approaching. As this will be my second year in Miami for WMC, I’m pretty excited. Not only do I get to see my baby bro down there but it’ll also be a mini UMich reunion. We’ve got a solid crew for the trip down south that took months (yes, months) of planning.

Don’t these tickets look amazing?

Did I mention it’s also my birthday weekend?

Can you tell I’m excited?

Now the only concern is trying to figure out how to go to both Ultra and MM on Friday..

2  On our way back we walked at the high tide line noticing so many beautiful things and I collected lots more little treasures for my ‘washed up’ collection.

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3  My turn to host the Treggies’ Sunday singing session – it was a good one. The neighbours loved hearing us through the walls!

xoxoxxxx