Existe algo pior do que uma segunda-feira?

Sim, uma segunda-feira pós feriado.

E o que devemos fazer? Rir da desgraça alheia!

Por Amanda Miranda

Esse seriado está bombando nos Estados Unidos. A história gira em torno da jovem Amy Juergens de 15 anos, filha de pais separados que, após uma noite com Ricky Underwood no acampamento, fica grávida. Sua irmã Ashley e os seus amigos estão sempre por perto para ajudar. Ela começa a namorar Ben que lhe dá todo o apoio que merece. Resumindo ele é um fofo, quer casar com ela e assusmir o filho que nem é dele (esse conto de fadas nem sempre acontece).

A Vida Secreta de uma Adolescente Americana

Esse seriado tem uma grande lição para as meninas que ficam grávidas nessa idade e têm que assumir essa grande responsabilidade, que não é nada fácil.

Eu quero falar aqui sobre isso. Hoje em dia existem métodos para evitar a gravidez, como o uso da camisinha (que serve para prevenir várias doenças sexualmente transmissíveis) e o anticoncepcional (para evitar apenas a gravidez). Antes deve-se passar na ginecologista para ela orientar e tirar todas as dúvidas que surgem nessa idade.

E para os meninos a dica também serve. Ser pai muito cedo também não é fácil. Tem que se cuidar porque quando se tem uma criança, além de ganhar responsabilidadeo, perde-se a adolescência que é uma fase ótima da vida e que deve ser aproveitada com juízo.

A série vai ao ar no Boomerang toda terça-feira às 21hs.

O trailer é em inglês, mas é só para vocês terem uma idéia de como é a série. Espero que gostem!

“May I have your visas please?” asked the friendly check-in clerk.

“Visas?” I said “No, you don’t understand. Let me explain – we’re British, we’re flying to Australia, we don’t need visas.”

How many of you know you need a visa to enter Australia? Well, how were we to know? Why didn’t you tell us! What ever happened to the British Empire and the map with a quarter of the world painted pink? You blink for half a century and it’s disappeared. Huh? We’re subjects of the same Queen! Isn’t Oz part of the Commonwealth for crying out loud?

We knew we needed extra security checks when travelling to the USA. The flight booking website informed us that the old Visa-Waiver system was no longer sufficient for Brits and that we had to apply on-line a month or two before with passport and travel details so as to get a Homeland Security check before entering the country. But you still didn’t need a visa for North America.

And so it was that we found ourselves at the Qantas check-in desk at Central Station in downtown Hong Kong, thinking we had timed things just nicely, early morning, a couple of hours to spare, we’d check in our bags at Central Station then take the MTR underground to the Airport and have a leisurely hour or so sipping lattes and espressos whilst waiting to board. Instead we had a rather sudden shock and a tense wait to find out if perhaps neither of us, just one or us, or (preferably) both of us could board the plane and fly to Oz!

I have to say the staff at Qantas Hong Kong were fabulous! On realising our predicament the check-in clerk informed us that they could apply to the Australian authorities on our behalf then and there, but could not of course guarantee whether we would be allowed visas. So they did, and whilst copies of our passports and documentation were made and quickly electronically whizzed into the ether, we were instructed to wait at Central Station. After about half and hour or so we were informed that Judith had been granted a visa but that they had not been informed about me.

Typical!

I remember once completing a life-assurance questionnaire; one of the questions was “Is your job dangerous?” I immediately thought of pastors and missionaries I knew who were daily facing persecution around the world, and hesitated for a moment before answering “It should be”. Perhaps this was now coming back to haunt me. Somewhere in the International Electronic Database there was an entry on Comrade Le Tocq J. P. which read “BEWARE: this man thinks he’s dangerous.” There’s only one thing worse than a man who’s dangerous and that’s a man who thinks he’s dangerous. At other times I would have been proud of this accolade but now there it was causing me to be barred forever from enjoying boomerangs in their natural habitat. Perhaps I would not be allowed back into the UK! Maybe I would end up marooned as some crazed, volatile, politico-religious exile in Hong Kong, without citizenship, lost in the maze of streets in Kowloon, trying to communicate in Pidgin-Cantonese “Oh Pea Roh… Me No Visa… Lob Loofah!”, proclaiming the end of the world, and thinking himself dangerous for the rest of his life.

We were informed that, because of time getting short now before take-off, we should make our way on the MTR from Central Station to Hong Kong Airport where we were to inquire at the Qantas desk whether I had been granted a visa or not. So off we went. And what a peaceful and gleeful train journey that was, as we calmly discussed whether just Judith should fly or should she wait in Hong Kong with me if it transpired that my visa was not issued in time, and whether we could afford the extra cost of new tickets. Of course we prayed a little too.

And so it was as the Qantas assistant at the airport desk recovered from the sloppy kiss I gave her (or was it ‘him’? – I never stopped long enough to check) having informed us that my visa had been granted, that Judith and I could be seen skipping through the Departures gate with time enough for a much desired espresso and a latte before we boarded the flight and headed south for the next part of our adventure towards Sydney, the land of Oz and Hillsong Church…

Just watch.  Please.

I was listening to some old school rap the other day on the Sirius Backspin station (love that station).  Special Ed came over my Sirius Radio with his song “The Mission.”  One of the lyrics is , “well, I was coolin’ at the crib with this girl Suzanne, and everything was goin’ just accordin’ to plan…”  That had me thinking…

Imagine this, fellas.  You meet a young lady on a night out or invite someone over.  There is some stimulating conversation, eye contact, a light touch on the arm.  The personal space between you is getting less and less by the second.  Perhaps a kiss.   The next thing you know, the two of you are alone in a dark room in the throws of passion.  It’s on.

The next morning (or even later that night. Damn fellas, ginseng), the two of you lay there for a moment, her snuggled up next to you with her head on your chest.  You gently kiss her on the head and think “Yes, that was awesome. Everything went just as planned.”

…according to your plan…or hers?

Women are a lot more aggressive these days in all aspects of their lives, career, finances, education (nothing wrong with that at all).  Why wouldn’t they be more aggressive in sex?   On occasion, I’ve heard women plotting on men as if they were going to club him over the head and drag him home for what they “needed”.  I used to be taken aback by this, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that this sort of role reversal was just a natural progression of the times.

I really don’t think we were ready for this.  Perhaps it happened with the change of the family paradigm or some women just got tired of traditional relationships.  Whatever it was, it’s changed the way relationships are.

In the 1992 classic film “Boomerang” (I know I’ve referenced it before ,but it’s a classic; if you haven’t seen it, rent it this weekend).  The character of Jacqueline Boyer (played by Robin Givins) represents what many women are involving into now:  a female that is successful, aggressive, and unapologetic.

There was one scene where Marcus Graham (played by Eddie Murphy) bought tickets for he and Jacqueline to go to a show…except she never showed up and had him waiting outside the theater like a fool.  She didn’t call to say she would be late and Marcus was calling everywhere to see if she was alright. Later, Jacqueline shows up at his crib damn near “butt ass neck-ed”, bangs his brains out, puts $200 on the dresser for him like he’s a project ho, and leaves!  No cuddle time or pillow talk involved.  Damn!

When “Boomerang” came out, many thought Jacqueline would be nothing more than a fictional character that would never play out in the real world.  Fast forward as we move towards 2010.  I’m sure we all know a few “Jacqueline’s”.

Funny thing.  Recently I went out with some friends and overheard two men talking (I tried not to listen, it was hard not to).  One guy was talking with the other about a woman he’d recently met.  He couldn’t understand what happened between them.  Their relationship seemed to be going well, but after they’d had sex a few times, it seemed like she didn’t want to see him anymore and wouldn’t return any of his calls.  It seemed like sex was all she wanted from him.  He wanted to know what happened.

What happened was everything went according to plan…

If you know a Jacqueline or just want to comment, feel free…

Saturday, October 31, 2009
Boardwalk

Sunday, November 1, 2009
Boomerang

The weekend did not turn out how I had planned.   But what else is new?   I’ve been battling migraines for the last 10 days or so, and Saturday’s hit me rather hard—I haven’t had one that made me cry and revert into a fetal position for almost 4 years.   It freaked my husband out as well, and he doesn’t freak out easily.    And it was Halloween, too, so that was a bummer, but my husband managed to get everyone where they needed to be.  Thanks to several drug aids, both over the counter and prescription, I was able to feel somewhat human by the end of the day, and we tried the Boardwalk martini.

It was made up of vodka, dry vermouth, maraschino, and lemon juice, with a lemon twist.   This tasted very much like a standard martini to me, but sweeter, so I was happy with that.    My husband thought it was too sweet—he is a purist and likes unadulterated vodka, not even the flavored varieties.   I think next time I would decrease the maraschino a bit, and perhaps cut out the lemon altogether.  I do not mind having other stuff in my martinis, a Cosmo comes immediately to mind.

Sunday was a difficult day for me.   One of my good friends has been battling breast cancer, she had finished up the chemo and was mid-way through radiation when she started to feel very poorly.    She ended up in the emergency room the week before (at the same time my mother was there, which is a different story.  It is very odd, serendipity, or maybe it is the Universe giving a not-so-gentle nudge) and has been in the hospital ever since.   The news is serious, and we’ve all been doing a lot of praying, visiting and putting our lives into perspective, or should I say realigning our perspectives.

Forgive me for digressing, I know this blog is supposed to be about Adventures in Martini-ing.    But our views are affected by what is going on our lives and what I can write about.

Back to the Boomerang Martini, which was Sunday’s experiment.    This was again similar to a traditional martini:  gin, dry vermouth (we used up all the vermouth, eeeek!), dash (only a DASH) of Angostura bitters, maraschino.  I failed on getting the kiwi garnish, oopsie.  I doubt it would have made much of a difference.  It was good, not completely memorable, but a solid martini-like drink, not too sweet or too bitter.   I had two, I think.  Or whatever was left over in the shaker after I had poured the initial one for myself and my husband.

Thanks for stopping by,
Sue

Two things happen when you’re a self employed single woman in New York City who writes, edits and researches for your cheese.

#1: During jury duty, you tell the plaintiff’s attorney that due to your multiple deadlines, his manipulative, time-eating banter with Juror Number Four is becoming an economic hardship for you.

#2: You lack the energy and concentration to blog for free.

You know, I recently realized that my relationship with this blog is like that of Angela from Boomerang and the young Black youth at her Saturday art class. Only I’m not pausing on small.medium.large after having my heart broken by a Jehri-box wearer named Maaaaaacuss. I’m forsaking it for the rat race. (Cue in “Love Should Have Brought You A Fellowship Last Night…”)

This is Angela in career gal mode. But she still has so much love in her heart.

Anyway, I want to be the Angela who gets the visit from the kids at her powerful new gig and presumably balances her community work with her for-profit endeavors. I want to be sweet Angie who designs blue people and makes inspired speeches about love.

So today I’m posting, quickly. If you’re still with me here, consider this an IOU, a public meditation of sorts. (And for the commenter who recently took time from her/his action-packed life to post “yawn” on an ancient entry, consider this your lullaby, bitch.)

I, Ak, pledge that I will post after seeing “Precious” on Saturday. Yes, my butt clenches every time I think of Lee “Monster’s Ball” Daniels adapting the pitiful story of a dark-skinned, fat Black teen with two kids by her stepfather and a mother who, at least in the book, forces her to perform oral sex on her. But I should at least see the film before I throw up in my mouth, right?

I’m also posting to tell you, my 16 devoted readers, that the book I co-edited, Naked: Black Women Bare All About Skin, Hair, Hips, Lips and Other Parts, has lapsed from printing. Apparently it sold well for years, then dropped off in the last two quarters. This is what the paperwork says, even though people keep running up on me in the street saying they just discovered and read it. The good people at the publisher’s office are working with us, but it’s still annoying as hell.

Naked, no more? Bah!

OK, this is starting to feel like something bitter-but-powerful Angela would write between barking orders at her incompetent creative staff so I’m signing off. But Saturday y’all.

E foi assim….

Em um domingo chuvoso.. sem nada passando nos meus canais, já salvos na lista de favoritos da tv a cabo, que decidi zappear por todos.

Primeiramente cai no Telecine, que passava o chatissimo Mamma Mia, o que me rendeu bons minutos de sono.

Ai acordei e continuei mudando os canais….

Do nada paro no Boomerang, canal que eu jurava nen existir mais, o nome na tela me chamou a atenção:

Fui obrigado a ver….

O Temporada de Moda, resultado de uma parceria entre o canal e a revista Capricho, funciona como um Project Runway TEEN. 

São eram 17 estudantes das melhores faculdades de moda de SP, que estão tentando para a concorrida vaga de estagio na revista.

Ao contrario do Project Runway, os participantes não fazem as roupas, eles são os produtores de moda, dai eles tem que se virar com o que tem e fazer sempre o melhor trabalho possível. 

Acho os trabalhos, de alguns, super legais. Adoro as coisas que eles falam, adoro as brigas (Episodio 7 tem a mais engraçada, tipo a menina, Clarissa, tenta provar que ela tava certa e manda voltar a fita. Eles voltam e fita e ela tava certa, mas como ela é muito fofa e meio barraqueira e controlada, ainda acha que pode estar errada.) Agora no episódio 8, prepare-se, a dupla que foi a pior na prova volta pra tentar salvar um dos participantes, o primeiro look deles deixa a cliente igual um colchão, o segundo igual um colchão amarrado e o terceiro igual uma virgem de 40 anos.

Enfim o programa é mara, algo que eu não espera encontrar na tv brasileira. 

Tirando o fato de que um dos editoriais (que pode ser visto na revista que está nas bancas) é uma leve (leia-se copia) inspiração do editorial da Emma Watson para a Teen Vogue, mas como na vida nada se cria tudo se recopia.. (confesso que adoraria a tirar fotos de um editorial legal assim!)

Pra quem se interessar: Todas as Quartas as 21hrs no Boomerang. E todos os dias no site.

La imagen más extendida de la navegación de los antiguos egipcios se ha asociado siempre a sus viajes a través del Río Nilo, sin embargo existen gran cantidad de indicios que señalan inequívocamente su presencia sobre los mares. En pinturas murales de más de 3.000 años de antigüedad, aparecen escenas de marineros que desde sus embarcaciones comprueban las profundidades del mar próximas a la costa con una pesa atada a una larga cuerda.

Los barcos egipcios más antiguos que se conocen estaban construidos sobre un armazón de madera y eran lo suficientemente grandes para albergar como mínimo a 20 remeros. Iban equipados con un solo mástil dotado de una vela rectangular y uno o dos grandes remos situados en popa que realizaban la función de timón, siendo capaces de transportar varias cabezas de ganado o el peso equivalente en mercancías. Su actividad comercial se extendía a varios puntos geográficos del Mediterráneo y Mar Rojo.

En la Piedra de Palermo aparecen datos de tiempos del Faraón Snefru (IV Dinastía), en los que se narra una expedición comercial de cuarenta barcos a la ciudad de Biblos en tierras de Canaán para cargar madera de cedro, un material muy apreciado por los antiguos egipcios, así como de la construcción de un barco de 52 metros de longitud.

SIGUE LEYENDO LA ENTRADA HACIENDO CLICK EN: “Leer el resto de la entrada”

En uno de los papiros que se guardan en el British Museum aparece el nombre de un gran puerto comercial, “Per Neferu” (Buen Viaje), punto estratégico para la llegada y salida de las rutas marítimas comerciales hacia tierras asiáticas. Del mismo modo también aparecen distintas relaciones del material necesario para la construcción de diferentes clases de barcos.

En el templo funerario del Faraón Sahure (V Dinastía), existen distintos relieves de barcos egipcios que regresan después de una expedición por tierras asiáticas cargados de esclavos y prisioneros.

LAS GRANDES EXPEDICIONES MARÍTIMAS

Existe una leyenda que incluso llegó a ser recogida por el historiador griego Heródoto, en la que se relata que, durante el reinado de Necao II (616 a.C.) se emprendió una expedición por mandato del propio faraón, y en la que se empleó a los más expertos marineros de aquellos tiempos, los fenicios. Durante un periodo de dos años, una flota fenicia armada por Necao II realizó un viaje de más de 20.000 kilómetros alrededor del continente africano.

Reproducción pictórica de un barco egipcio de altura procedente del templo mortuorio del Faraón Sahure

Los griegos recogieron también historias de otros de los mejores navegantes del mundo antiguo junto a los fenicios, los cartagineses. El caudillo cartaginés Hannon recorrió en numerosas ocasiones la costa occidental africana, fundando diferentes colonias como, Karikon, Teichos, Gytte, Akra, Thymiaterión, etc…

En una de las ocasiones organizó una expedición desde Cartago en la que participaron unos 60 barcos y en la que a lo largo de su recorrido se llegaron a fundar siete colonias. No se sabe con exactitud hasta donde llegaron en su aventura, pero las descripciones nos hablan de una montaña muy alta que arrojaba fuego y que denominaron “el trono de los dioses”, que ha hecho sospechar a los expertos que la expedición Hannon llegó a alcanzar el Camerún.

En el año 330 a.C., Piteas organizó una expedición rumbo al Círculo Ártico, surcando el Mar Báltico a través de los peligrosos témpanos flotantes de hielo. En la narración de sus aventuras aparecen aspectos que confirman completamente la veracidad de esta expedición, como la descripción con todo rigor de las interminables noches polares, un fenómeno desconocido en el mundo mediterráneo.

Egipto fue en su momento toda una potencia política, económica y militar, y dispuso de todo tipo de recursos, bien propios o de pueblos satélites como los fenicios, cartagineses o griegos para realizar grandes expediciones a distintos puntos geográficos del planeta.
Pero, ¿hasta dónde llegaron sus límites?

AUSTRALIA DESTINO FINAL

Una de las obras maestras de la literatura egipcia que ha llegado hasta nosotros es la conocida como “Relato del náufrago”. En ella aparecen las aventuras de un desafortunado marinero que naufragó cuando se dirigía en su barco a recoger minerales de territorio nubio. El barco lo formaba una tripulación de 120 marineros y sus medidas eran 60 metros de eslora por 20 de manga. Sucumbió en medio de una fuerte tempestad y ante el empuje de olas de 4 metros de altura.

Algo parecido tuvo que suceder en la narración que nos hace un conjunto de jeroglíficos ubicado en un lugar un tanto extraño y alejado de las correrías de los antiguos egipcios. Nos referimos a Australia, y más exactamente al Parque Nacional del Valle del Cazador, al norte de Sidney.

Sobre las rocas de un monte aparecen más de 250 jeroglíficos egipcios, entre los que destaca en un cartucho el nombre de Djedf-Ra (Diodefre), hijo de Keops y nieto de Snefru, lo que sitúa este hecho histórico dentro del Antiguo Imperio y más exactamente durante la IV Dinastía.

En estos jeroglíficos se narra la aventura de una expedición al mando de Djes-Djes-Eb, un noble egipcio que junto a su tripulación naufraga en tierras extrañas, y en las que después de pasar muchas calamidades fallece por la mordedura de una serpiente venenosa.

Arriba: la conocida como “Piedra de Tjuringa”, localizada en Australia Occidental

Ariba: la familia de Akenatón es envuelta por los rayos de Atón (el Sol). Observense las pequeñas manos al final de los rayos del Sol en ambas representaciones.

En Queensland, otra zona de Australia, fueron encontrados varios escarabajos sagrados egipcios y la estatua de un babuino, un animal desconocido en estos parajes y al que los egipcios usaban al igual que al pájaro ibis, para representar al dios de la ciencia, Thot. Otra de estas curiosas estatuas fue localizada en Leura, en las Montañas Azules de Nueva Gales del Sur.

En este mismo lugar, cerca de la localidad de Kyogle, la hija de un agricultor encontró en el campo un amuleto de ámbar con forma de obelisco y extrañas inscripciones. Expertos del Museo de Departamentos de Minas dictaminaron que el amuleto era egipcio y que su antigüedad alcanzaba los 5.000 años.

En una cueva de Tierra de Arnhem existe el dibujo de un Ojo de Horus, e incluso en el Museo de Katoomba se pueden ver diferentes monedas localizadas en distintos punto de Australia de origen egipcio y romano.

Dos estatuas fueron halladas junto al Río Hawkesbury en Nueva Gales del Sur, y en ellas aparecen las cabezas de dos hombres con unos claros rasgos faciales semíticos. En el Museo de Perth se puede ver un plato descubierto en 1972 de origen fenicio, donde aparece una estrella de David junto a caracteres fenicios y egipcios.

La conocida como “Piedra Tjuringa”, encontrada en Australia central, es una copia idéntica de como los antiguos egipcios representaban el símbolo de Aton (el Sol) allá sobre el año 1.000 a.C.

Izquierda: la estatua de un babuino. Este animal representaba al dios de la ciencia egipcia Thot, encontrado junto al Río Hawkesbury en Nueva Gales del Sur, Australia.

HUELLAS EN EGIPTO

Pero no sólo existen vestigios de la visita de antiguos egipcios a Australia. También en el propio Egipto podemos hallar huellas que nos indican que en algún momento de la historia los pobladores de Egipto y Australia cruzaron sus destinos.

En 1.984 el periódico “Cairo Times” publicó la noticia del hallazgo de fósiles de canguros cerca del Oasis de Siwa. En la necrópolis de Sakkara, en el conjunto funerario del Faraón Unas (VI Dinastía), se han localizado escenas de caza de distintos animales, entre los que increíblemente aparecían canguros. También en Tell al-Amarna, la capital que mando construir Akhenatón se han encontrado dibujos de estos animales.

La presencia de “boomerang” en relieves egipcios que ya en su momento aparecieron en la tumba de Tutankamon constituye uno de los mayores misterios, ya no sólo por su presencia en tierras del Nilo, sino incluso por su utilización por parte de los aborígenes australianos.

Derecha: imagen de un canguro aparecido en el complejo funerario del Faraón Unas en Sakkara (VI Dinastía) entre otras escenas de animales. Está resaltado en negro para que se pueda apreciar con calidad.

A finales del siglo XVIII fue descubierta la existencia de este extraño artilugio con increíbles capacidades aerodinámicas producto de muchos años de estudio y que no deja de representar todo un anacronismo histórico dentro de estos pueblos primitivos.

Sin embargo no todos los “boomerang” utilizados por los aborígenes tienen la propiedad de regresar a su punto de partida una vez lanzados, e incluso esta característica era desconocida para muchos de ellos. Sólo algunas tribus eran poseedoras de introducir esta capacidad en la construcción de los “boomerang” que fue heredada en tiempos remotos.

Esta circunstancia nos ha hecho pensar que, la fabricación de los “boomerang” estaba en pleno proceso involutivo a la llegada de los descubridores europeos a Australia, y que sólo algunas tribus de aborígenes conservaban una técnica, una estética y una calidad de acabado capaces de obtener la forma aerodinámica perfecta para ser dotados de la capacidad de regresar de nuevo una vez lanzados.

El uso que hicieron los egipcios de los “boomerang” parece que fue el de arma de mano, y ocasionalmente como arma arrojadiza para la caza. A pesar de ello se han encontrado “boomerang” perfectos, capaces de volver de nuevo al punto de lanzamiento, una característica que desconocían y que es sinónimo del origen exterior de esto artefactos.

Izquierda: colección de boomerang del Museo Egipcio en El Cairo

Arriba: escena de caza de aves en el antiguo Egipto con boomerang.

Ariba: un aborigen australiano prepara su boomerang para ir de caza.

Arriba: boomerang encontrados por Howard Carter e la Tumba de Tutankamon.

PIRÁMIDES AUSTRALIANAS

Son varias las noticias que apuntan a la presencia de construcciones piramidales en Australia, algunas de ellas aprovechando accidentes geográficos naturales para su realización. Naturalmente esta posibilidad ha sido completamente desechada por los arqueólogos.

Una de las más famosas “pirámides” se puede localizar en Gympie, al norte de Queensland, una construcción escalonada de unos 40 metros de altura, dónde curiosamente se encontraron numerosas piezas con representaciones de escarabajos sagrados y la estatua de uno de los “babuinos” a los que hacíamos referencia anteriormente.

Según las tradiciones aborígenes, esta y otras construcciones megalíticas existentes en toda Australia fueron realizadas por una raza de gigantes (se pueden ver huellas de pisadas fósiles de un tamaño gigantesco de fisonomía humana en estratos de esquisto en las Montañas Azules, Nueva Gales del Sur).

Oficialmente esta construcción es achacada a agricultores inmigrantes llegados a Australia en el siglo XIX, que levantaron terrazas para el cultivo, pero que la mala calidad del terreno les hizo abandonar. Otra de estas construcciones piramidales más famosas se localiza cerca de Port McQuarie, en Nueva Gales del Sur. Para su construcción se emplearon bloques de piedra que en algunos casos alcanzaban las 40 toneladas. También cerca de Gordonvale, al sur de Cairns existe otra construcción de tipo escalonado.

En cualquier caso, todas estas evidencias de un pasado desconocido son completamente ignoradas y desechadas por quienes de una forma interesada han escrito la historia.

FUENTE:

EL FARAÓN EXTRATERRESTRE

I was at a female friend’s place last Sunday watching a few of the football games.  Nothing sexual.  We’ve always flirted, but we kept it at that.  We kicked back on the sofa, threw a few pillows back and forth, ordered a pizza, and got ready for a full day of watching what many be the manliest of all sports.

She sat there in her t-shirt and oversized sweats, with her hair pulled back in a single pony tail.  No make up or perfume.  Just two friends layin’ back.

Out of the blue she says to me perhaps the sexiest thing I’ve ever heard…

“Notice how Eli (Manning) always says “Omaha” right before the snapcount they’re going on.  He might need to switch that up. The defense is starting to catch on.”

My head quickly snapped to.  Huh? How did she catch onto that?? And she said it before the announcer says the same thing.

Suddenly, she seemed to glow a bit, almost radiant.  A while later…

“Idiot!! Why would you pass on 3rd and a mile inside your own 10 yard line? You’ve given the other team great field position on the kickoff.  Why don’t you just give the game away? Moron.”

I smiled at her as she started talking about how the coach has been calling boneheaded plays all game, but I wasn’t paying attention.   I just kept staring at her longingly.  Luckily, I was able to come to my senses and focus on the game.

I almost got trapped.

Fellas, it can happen to you too.  Beware.  Nowadays, women are infiltrating the inner sanctum of our mancaves.  Football Sundays are no longer just ours.  Women are watching boxing more and more.  The commissioner of my fantasy football league is a woman (she’s good too).

It’s not a new concept.  We men have been doing that for years.  Tell me you haven’t tried to cook a woman a meal to impress her. Tell me you didn’t watch Eddie Murphy as Marcus Graham in the movie “Boomerang” put on his mac and seduce Lela Rochon’s fine ass  and say….”Hmmmm, rosemary, huh.  I’ll have to add some of that next time I cook salmon” (great movie, rent if you haven’t seen it).

I’ve talked with female friends of mine that admitted to me they learned more about a sport to trap a man.  I’m not saying that there aren’t some women out there that are genuinely interested in football, but when a female friend of yours starts breaking down the zone blitz to you, your radar should be going up.

Women are smart fellas.  No longer are they thinking “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.”  Now, they’re telling you why a wide receiver’s yards after catch should be higher.

If a girl you’re dating know more about your favorite sport than you, she’s got a plan.

I’m just trying to look out for you.

What are your thoughts? Feel free to comment.

I passed an old pizza place my college boyfriend and I used to go at least once a week this weekend. It’s been thirteen years, but my mind reached far back and I could see the two of us sitting there in the front booth, eating a large cheese pizza in front of the big-screen TV, watching ESPN.

Then I felt sad just for a bit because of the way it all turned out. I think it’s ok to mourn the death of what we had and and in no way is it a reflection of the feelings I have now for my husband. I was crushed – devastated (I’m talking Bella in New Moon) when he broke it off after three years. He was my first love and I guess it’s true you always keep a little tiny place in your mind for these memories.

But I know now it was for the best. I spent my senior year single and found my forever best friend, got a tattoo (with said best friend) and partied a bit (sorry mom) with that same best friend. (That same best friend that’s headed to LA with me in less than two weeks!!!)

I was single for four years, found myself, found my career, then found my sweet hubs – who “did not want a relationship” but couldn’t say no to me.

Isn’t it strange how these memories kinda pop up out of nowhere sometimes and they just kinda throw you back for a minute? Do guys experience these same kind of feelings, or is it just us emotional gals?

	Frankenstein’s Cat
	Sábado 31: 18:00 (DirecTV) / 15:00 (CableVisión)

	ICarly
	Sábado 31: 21:30 (DirecTV) / 18:30 (CableVisión)

	Oye Arnold!
	Sábado 31: 19:30 (DirecTV) / 16:30 (CableVisión)

	Roxy Hunter y una temerosa noche de… | Película
	Sábado 31: 22:30 (DirecTV) / 19:30 (CableVisión)

	Candy stunt | Especial
	Sábado 31: desde las 09:00 (DirecTV) / desde las 08:00 (CableVisión)

	PLAYHOUSE DISNEY:Una noche de Halloween | Especial
	Sábado 31: 19:00

	Halloweentown | Película
	Sábado 31: 16:00

	Halloween en Boomerang | Especial
	Sábado 31: desde las 10:00 (DirecTV)

	El mensajero de la oscuridad
	Sábado 31: 18:30 (DirecTV)

	Jeepers Creepers II | Película
	Sábado 31: 22:00 (DirecTV)

	Halloween, el comienzo | Película
	Sábado 31: desde las 09:00 (DirecTV) / desde las 08:00 (CableVisión)

	Criss Angel “Mindfreak”:Halloween Special | Especial
	Sábado 31: 10:00 | 13:00 (DirecTV)

	Los Simpson | Especial
	Sábado 31: desde las 18:00

	Monster House: la casa de los sustos | Película
	Sábado 31: 22:00

	Masters of Horror | Película
	Sábado 31: 23:00

	Stephen King “El hospital de los muertos” | Especial
	Sábado 31: desde las 13:00

	Subject Two | Película
	Sábado 31: 21:00

Nightmate on Elm Street 2 | Película Sábado 31: 22:30 (DirecTV) / 21:00 (CableVisión)

	Friends | Especial
	Sábado 31: 18:00 (DirecTV) / 16:30 (CableVisión)

	Especial de Halloween. Revelaciones.
	Sábado 31: desde las 20:00 (DirecTV) / desde las 19:00 (CableVisión)

Los horarios pertenecen al territorio de Argentina.

This is so true. When I was younger, in the early 90s, Cartoon Network was the greatest channel ever. With its random Hanna-Barbara resurrections and He-Man rip offs (or vice versa, Thundarr might have come first…) it was a goldmine for real, classic cartoons.

Today its a shadow of its former self, much like Melly Gibson or Tom Cruise, and that makes me sad…

RetroJunk has a great article on it. And by great article I mean three sentence blurb complaining about the same things I just mentioned. But still, its worth checking out. I have to disagree with them, though, as I believe Cartoon Network started dying as soon as they started cramming their own cartoons down kids’ throats…