(effectivement il y a de quoi être attristée.

Ses petites oreilles stimulent le clitoris et son godemichet vibre et tourne. Le masturbateur anal est le sex toy idéal qui délivre des sensations proche de la sodomie dans un anus humain. Je vous donne un exemple: le lubrifiant, lors de la masturbation du pénis avec une main, permet à la main de mieux glisser sur le pénis ainsi que des modifications d’orientation de la main sans lâcher l’organe.

Le double godemichet est un long (et habituellement flexible) godemichet avec deux extrémités conçues pour la pénétration. Some models include a protruding clitoral stimulator, designed to stimulate the clitoris during sex. Water based lubricants are best and they should be stored in a dry place.

Cock rings prolong male erection by withholding blood inside the penis. vibrators intended for sexual use are often dildo-shaped, although they also come in a wide range of shapes and sizes, allowing internal and external use. Il existe une variante vibrante.

La. S. A man may wear a cock-ring to combat erectile difficulties, or because for the sensation of tightness and engorgement that wearing one provides.

Certains peuvent être utilisés comme jouets de bdsm, ou comme éléments de torture. L’un des accessoires les plus érotiques pour des jeux érotique en couple. Si vous l'utilisez sur votre partenaire, faites-le par exemple après l'avoir observé s'en servir soi-même.

Enfin pour obtenir une dilatation anale à votre rythme, on trouve des sextoys anal que l’on gonfle avec une poire et c’est alors à vous de determiner les limites de votre plaisir! Plus du godemichet externe destiné au partenaire, un ou deux plugs internes destinés au porteur ou à la porteuse de la ceinture. Par ailleurs, ces boules de geisha se retirent très aisément à l’aide du cordon.

Vous pouvez sortir de chez vous ou rester à la maison, selon votre état.

Les poupées sexuelles sont des imitations de la forme humaine destinée à la simulation des actes sexuels. L'utilisation de boules de geisha est parfois conseillé aux femmes souhaitant remuscler leur plancher pelvien après un accouchement ou en cas d'incontinence. Les godemichets ceintures utilisés.

Il est par ailleurs le premier musée au monde à s'être entièrement dédié aux sex-toys et objets de plaisir très divers. Le cockring est employé pour fournir une sensation supplémentaire (à un ou aux deux partenaires) en enveloppant la base du pénis. For long periods of time.

Le feeldoe a la même fonction qu’un gode-ceinture mais il possède deux têtes, une petite et une grande. A triple crown is a special cock-ring that has additional rings for restraining the testicles. Principalement utilisé en dehors des rapports sexuels, rien n'empêche d'intégrer les boules de geishas à des jeux érotiques.

Il existe différentes sortes de sex toys selon vos goûts et envies. Some rubber toys contain phthalates which are used to soften rubber, but carry serious risks. On trouve des boules de geisha légères ou lourdes, en métal ou en plastique souple, avec des boules internes plus ou moins puissantes et qui font plus ou moins de bruit.

L’ excitation est proportionnelle aux mouvements du corps qui vont faire que les billes vont rouler à l’interieur de vos boules de geisha qui mesurent entre 3 et 3,5 cm de diamètre; Le harnais godemichet est un godemichet fixé à un harnais attaché à l'aine et aux hanches pour permettre à une personne de pénétrer son partenaire, comme si le godemichet était le propre pénis du pénétrant. Prostate massage toys are specially curved toys that are designed to stimulate the prostate, such as the aneros.

Vous avez été bien sage, cette année ? Oui ? Alors, après ces quelques tutos pour Photoshop, voici, cette fois-ci, une sélection d’objets vectoriels (au format AI ou EPS), toujours sur le thème de Noël. Encore une fois, si vous utilisez les ressources proposées ci-dessous, pensez à mentionner les auteurs. C’est le seul prix à payer. Comme quoi, le Père Noël existe pour de vrai… Pour chaque ressource, cliquez sur l’image pour accéder au site/blog de chaque contributeur.
Certaines ressources sont libres pour un usage privé et commercial, d’autres pour un usage privé seulement.
Pensez à lire les conditions d’utilisation définies par les auteurs.

PEHAA
Un superbe tuto pour commencer :

MINERCIA

ARAMISDREAM

123FREEVECTORS

FLASHTUSCHKA

MARIANNASM

DMMUSIKFAN

THIN-SPARK

10STOCK

SYNTHES

STOCKGRAPHICDESIGNS

DRYICONS

DRAGONARTZ
Beaucoup de ressources également sur Vector4Free…

PALMATEER DESIGN

ONETER

MOHSENFAKHARIAN

ARTBON

NAMALINA81

NEITHNIM84

LIBERTI

CHINA063

DESIGNIOUS TIMES

Cyberskin is a thermal plastic elastomer and is a close emulation of real skin.

Les lubrifiants à base d’eau sont les plus flexibles : ils n’endommageront pas les préservatifs, se lavent facilement et ne laissent aucune traces sur vos textiles. Même si la pénétration anale ne vous inspire pas car ce n’est pas quelque chose de naturel, vous changerez d’avis en testant un plug et serez surpris de la palette de sensations qu’il vous fera ressentir. Les jouets sexuels n'incluent ni la contraception, ni la pornographie, ni les préservatifs ou les digues dentaires.

Cette féminisation s’accompagne, chez ses promoteurs, d’une mise à distance de la pornographie, pratique typiquement masculine, jugée sale et malsaine (une ancienne responsable de magasin déclare par exemple : « on refusait de vendre des représentations basiques du pénis. The toy can be heated or chilled before use. vibrator wands, such as the hitachi magic wand, are large vibrators that generally plug into a wall (versus operating on battery power) and are marketed as back massagers.

Le but de son utilisation est semblable à celle d'un cockring. Longtemps que vous voulez, sans avoir besoin de s’arrêter pour relubrifier. Cyberskin is made from ingredients on fda approved lists and it does not contain phthalates, polyvinyl chloride (pvc), heavy metals or latex.

Le sextoy anal sur la photo ci- contre a quelque chose d’original par rapport aux masturbateur classiques : vous pourrez régler la force de succion afin d’avoir un anus plus ou moins étroit. Pas seulement liées aux préliminaires, elles. La pose de différents piercings sur le gland est parfois considérée comme érotique, voire stimulante lors de la pénétration.

Mais visiblement il y en a à qui c’est arrivé puisqu’ils les reproduisent pour en faire des godemichets!

If you were paying attention, and I’ll assume that you were, as hanging on my every word is quite unavoidable, you’ll notice where I called this page a sports site. This is only partially true (you’ll find, as we go forward, that partial truths are one of my many fortes, along with sneaky lies, eloquent hyperbole, and expertly placed scorn). In addition to sports, I will also be covering games. To deal with issues of server space and short attention spans, the two have been amalgamated under the catch-all phrase “sports” in such a way that they’ve lost all distinction. Well, I’m here to set the record straight… which should have been listed amongst my fortes… setting the record straight. I’m very good at it.

And actually, the distinction is quite simple to understand… and here’s the litmus test; if a fat 60 year old can do it moderately well, it’s not a sport, it’s a game. Simple as that.

So let’s get to it, shall we?

But first, let’s start by saying I’m not going to mention anything that’s so obviously a game that its’ combatants won’t even complain at having it called so. These include poker, backgammon, Madden challenge, Scrabble, spelling bees, etc… These have at most a very little physical aspect to them, and thus don’t qualify as a sport under any definition of the world. Plus, a fat 60 year old, after some practice, could be the best in the world at any of them.

American Football – Sport. Clearly, our fat 60 year old could strap on a helmet and shoulder pads and proceed to play the game, but this is where the “moderately well” portion of our litmus test comes into play. I would also recommend a stretcher, ambulance, priest and his loved ones be nearby.

Archery - Game. Games can be broken down into two categories… strictly mental games, like the ones mentioned above (Poker, Backgammon, etc…), or games that combine both mental and physical aspects. Alas, when it comes to archery’s physicality, we’re talking hand-eye coordination (true of many games) and average levels of strength. A fat 60 year old can handle those aspects.

Australian Rules Football – Sport. I would, though, like to see our fat 60 year old in one of these. Wait, no I wouldn’t. Forget I said that.

Auto Racing – Game. Let’s be honest here… the cars are the athletes. They’re the ones competing in a sport. The drivers, not so much. Yes, it’s physically and mentally demanding… but can you really sit there and tell me, perched on your high chair like you most certainly are, that a fat 60 year old couldn’t win one race, let alone do moderately well? Already, Mark Martin of Nascar fares quite well at age 50, and the oldest winner was 52. Formula one’s oldest winner was 53. And we’ve got a fat guy that regularly wins in Tony Stewart. Would he win? Probably not. Could he do moderately well? Definitely.

Badminton – Sport. Yes, our fat 60 year old, depending on what strata of society he finds himself within, might play regularly… probably with regular breaks for tea and judging people. But put that same fat 60 year old in a competitive environment, and he loses every time. There’s nothing “moderately well” about that.

Baseball – Sport. Baseball’s one of the trickier ones to call, actually. Most players are involved in a sport, but pitchers, particularly those pansies from the American League (what with the designated hitter rule), might be playing a game. We’ve seen plenty of successful fat guys… C.C. Sabathia, David Wells, Bartolo Colon, Jumbo Brown… most of them pitchers (though certainly the aforementioned designated hitter and first base are prone to successful fat guys, like Cecil Fielder, and John Kruk)… but could our 60 year old do it, at least moderately well? Maybe, but he’d have to be pretty special. And since most baseball players qualify as athletes playing a sport (unless you could see our fat 60 year old chase down a fly ball, or steal second… I don’t), we’ll call baseball a sport.

Basketball – Sport. Through and through. Even if our fat 60 year old was 7′4″, he still wouldn’t hold up, and that’s saying something.

Bobsleigh – Game. Any activity where gravity does the most work is a game. That fact should maybe be at the top, but at least it’s here. A fat person actually benefits from these kinds of games. As a matter of fact, until the governing body instituted a weight-limit rule in 1952, bobsleigh crews were very heavy. It should also be noted that bobsleigh inverse to baseball, as the pusher might actually be playing a sport, at least at the start of the race. This is of course before the gravity takes over, and it’s the pusher’s job to get the sled moving. But for most of the race, all members of the team are playing a game, hence, its’ designation here.

Bossaball – Sport. And a wild one at that. And just look at that photo (you’ll have to hover over “bossaball” to see it)… if any of you know a fat 60 year old that could even do that without gravely injuring him/herself, I want their name and number. I have an idea for a viral video. Oh, and if you want to know just what the hell bossaball is, check this out.

Boules – Game. Uh, yeah. This one’s obvious, right? From a class of games that includes Bocce, Lawn Bowling, Petanque, Boule Lyonaisse, Klootschieten and Varpa… games seemingly specifically created for the elderly (but fun nonetheless).

Bowling – Game. Again, no questions here, right? If so, just head to your local bowling alley. You’ll see plenty of fat, drunk 60 year olds bowling in the 200’s regularly. Not a sport.

Boxing – Sport. This one’s a bit thorny. George Foreman, at this very moment, is a fat 60 year old (ironic for a man synonymous with the Lean Mean Fat-Reducing Grilling Machine, but I digress). Could he really not fare at least moderately well in the ring today? Probably so… but this one comes with a caveat. The only way this could work is in the heavyweight division, where lumbering, plodding heavy punchers will always have a place. You can be all of those things as a fat 60 year old. In no other weight class would this be plausible. So on the whole, boxing’s a sport, whether the heavyweight division is a game or not.

Competitive Dance – Sport. So us macho types, like, for instance, myself, don’t like to admit that dance is a sport. But step back and take a look at it… extreme athleticism? Check. Very competitive? Check. Exclusion of fat 60 year olds? That’s a big fat check. And those of you who have been to a competitive dance… uh… competition?… and seen the merciless backstabbing and cutthroat sabotage that regularly unfolds know damn well that this is no game.

Cricket – Sport. The art of bowling sets cricket apart from baseball. As opposed to the standstill throw a pitcher delivers, the bowler’s is a violent, full-body action with an extended run-up that would certainly throw out the backs of most fat 60 year olds. Even the act of batting is more involved, as batsmen have been known to switch sides of the wicket while the bowler is in his run-up (this would be akin to a right-handed batter jumping over home plate to bat left-handed during a pitcher’s windup). No easy feat, and no place for a fat 60 year old to tread.

Curling – Game. There’s nothing about this game that a fat 60 year old couldn’t handle. They might be the best in the world at it, for all I know.

Cycling – Sport. A fat 60 year old in spandex? We don’t think so.

Darts – Game. One of the few games where being a fat 60 year old is an advantage.

Decathlon/Heptathlon/Pentathlon – Sport. This would, of course, be the end of our fat 60 year old. We had some good times, fat 60 year old. We’ll always remember you.

Disc Golf – Game. Another addendum; if stoners, hippies and other movement-reluctant bums fancy it, it’s a game.

Discus Throw – Game. The actual throwing of the discus any fat 60 year old could handle, and while some of them might be hilariously awful, some could reach the “moderately well” threshold… that’s the rub. It’s the leadup to the toss that gets a bit dicey. Most athletic 25 years olds will end up on their ass following it… and a fat 60 year old? He’ll get vertigo… unless… he/she was already an experienced discus thrower. A former champion, let’s say. Could he/she still fare moderately well? Of course.

Diving – Game. Here’s the thing… at the elite level, yes, diving is heavily populated by 15 year old, 58 pound Asians. But tack on 45 years and 200 pounds to those same Asians… and splashy, cannonball-esque entry aside, could they not at least fare reasonably well in a diving competition? I think so, yes.

Downhill Skiing – Sport. OK, let me explain. Yes, gravity plays a major role here, in fact, it’s the agent propelling the skier down the hill. But what sets downhill skiing apart from say the bobsleigh or the luge is that the skiier must use his/her athleticism against gravity, to turn, sometimes sharply. Without the ability to do so, the ability to fare, oh, I don’t know, let’s say moderately well, goes down the tubes. Our fat 60 year old would be carried faster than most down the hill, thanks to the “fat” part, would his/her 60 year old muscles be able to turn him/her appropriately? We have our doubts.

Equestrian – Game. Again, who’s the athlete here? Is it the person riding the horse, or the horse doing all the work? The horses are certainly competing in a sport… the person sitting on the horse? Not so much. Though we will admit that we certainly feel for the horse that has a fat 60 year old on its’ back.

Fencing – Game. We’ll admit, fencing takes incredible instincts and quickness, and the reflexes of a… uh…. well, something that has really fast reflexes. So we’re under no illusion that a fat 60 year old could be a champion. But let’s say renowned champion Sergei Golubitsky hits 60 and has let himself go a little (or a lot, whatever picture you throw into that head of yours). Were he to enter a competition, could he not fare at least moderately well? It says here he could.

Figure Skating – Sport. Unless points were awarded for sliding along the ice on your ass or stomach, our fat 60 year old would stand no chance here. None at all. Though, this does give me an idea. Who wouldn’t pay money to watch fat 60 year olds attempt some of these advanced moves. It’d be a train wreck, and train wrecks make good televsion… hmmmmm…. We’d have to come up with some appropriate clothing, but yeah, I think I could make it work.

Fishing/Angling – Game. Go watch your local fishing tournament this weekend. Take note of the number of people that aren’t fat 60 year olds. Now, nod in agreement with me.

Gaelic Football – Sport. A fat 60 year old would spend the entire game getting embarrassed, thus causing him, if he’s Irish (as we would expect, if he’s playing Gaelic Football), to pick a fight with every player on the pitch, followed by that particularly intoxicating brand of Irish violence… utter chaos, generally speaking… which would subsequently lead to everyone getting drunk together and singing songs. Stereotypical? You betcha… but I’ve lived it. And stereotypes exist for a reason, right?

Golf – Game. First, it’s a favorite of fat 60 year olds. Second, you could easily see one heating up and shooting a 70 on the same day Tiger Woods shoots a 72. An activity where you could play better than the world’s best? That’s a game, my friends. Let’s put that same fat guy up against Lebron James in a game of one-on-one. Does he ever win? Of course not. If we tied one of James’ arms behind his back, does the fat 60 year old ever win? Of course not. I believe I’ve eagled this one.

Gymnastics – Sport. OK, picture the fat 60 year old, and let’s go with a male. Now… and this won’t be easy… picture him in a unitard. Get past it, you can do it. OK, good. Now, picture him going through a routine on the pommel horse. How many times did he crush his nuts? 30? 40? No, this is no place for a fat 60 year old.

Hammer Throw – Game. Like the discus throw, the problem lies in the lead up to the throw. And like the discus throw, most people would end up on all fours attempting such a thing, with probably a vertigo supplementation for our fat 60 year old. But, like the discus, an experienced discus thrower who just happens to be fat and 60 could fare moderately well… thus… it’s a game.

Handball – Sport. Like many sports, a fat 60 year old could play handball, and like all of them, against decent competition, he’d get embarrassed to the point of taking up shuffleboard.

Hockey – Sport. Whether it be the ice or the field variety, the end results are the same. Our fat 60 year old hospitalized, probably with a feeding tube and catheter. It wouldn’t be pretty.

Horse Racing – Game. A great sport for horses, a decent game for humans. Again, how is this a sport for jockeys? Actually, let’s put it this way, if the real athlete in the sport (the horse) would be better off without human involvement (you know, faster without something on its’ back), then it’s no sport for humans. There. And yes, we’d need a very special, strong horse for our fat 60 year old, but there’s one out there that could lead it to a moderately decent finish.

Hurling – Sport. And one I’m not sure should be legal. Picture, Americans, a combination of baseball, soccer and handball. That’s right, they run around with what amounts to baseball bats in their hands, freely swinging them on the field of battle, with others all around them. Hence the helmets. I don’t think we should allow our fat 60 year old to even try this one. Let’s move on.

Hydroplane Racing – Game. Another sport where the humans are just controlling the athletes… in this case, crazy-fast boats. And another one a fat 60 year old would fancy his chances in. He might even prevent things like this from happening, what with the extra weight and all.

Jai Alai – Sport. I don’t think “the fastest sport in the world” is any place for a fat 60 year old. I don’t know, maybe that’s just me, but I’m gonna go ahead and give this one the sport nod, and move on, thus saving the life of our fat 60 year old, in all probability. Ed Honcho, hero.

Javelin Throw – Game. As with most throwing sports, where your average fat 60 year old wouldn’t be able to compete, one with experience should be able to at least fare moderately well. Hence the designation as a game. They are the Olympic Games, after all, right?

Jumping – Sport. This includes the High Jump, Long/Broad Jump and Triple Jump, not to mention certain obstacles for fat 60 year olds… namely, the whole jumping part.

Luge – Game. This falls under our aforementioned gravity rule (see: bobsleigh). Our 60 year old’s girth would do nothing but help him/her. Sure, he/she might end up in the hospital, but that’s true of thin 26 year olds as well.

Martial Arts – Sport. Unlike boxing’s heavyweight division, there are very few plodding, heavy hitters when it comes to any discipline of the martial arts. My recommendation to our fat 60 year old? Start tapping out as soon as the competition begins. I’m tired of these hospital bills. It’s starting to add up.

Motorcycle Racing – Game. Again, and maybe I should just put this on repeat. The humans here aren’t the real athletes. The motorcycles are. They’re the ones competing in a sport. The humans… simply enjoying their game. And sure, your average 60 year old would struggle… but a former motorcyle jockey who spent 10 years gorging on Tastykakes? He could fare, you guessed it, moderately well.

Netball/Korfball – Sport. Very similar to basketball, though not quite as arduous physically as one’s movement is restricted. Thus, at amateurish levels, a fat 60 year old could hold his/her own. But once we start to creep into the levels of “moderately decent”, the fat 60 year old falls short.

Orienteering/Rogaining – Game. Navigation-based competitions will always fall into the category of games, for obvious reasons, the most clear being that many fat 60 year olds already participate, and can certainly fare at least moderately well. The “fat” part undoubtedly doesn’t help, as these competitions are all on foot, but this deficiency can be made up for in other areas.

Pole Vault – Sport. The mere idea of a fat 60 year old attempting the pole vault has me sitting in my chair laughing my ass off (or SIMCLMAO, from here forward). This is no game.

Polo – Game. This is a combo event between the horse and the human, with the horse playing a sport and the human playing a hand-eye-coordination-based game. Our fat 60 year old could play this game, with a big enough horse, and play it quite well.

Racewalking – Game. This one just feels like a game, doesn’t it? It’s got that game funk all over it. And I’m not coming at this from a “what’s shoved up those guys asses?” point of view either. Nope. I know they’re great at what they do, and it takes talent. It’s just, what’s the ceiling on speed if you’re walking? And what’s the ceiling on speed if you’re a former racewalking champ who’s put on a few and 60 years old? Are they that far apart? That’s the thing. The slower racewalking speeds allow for the discrepancies in time to remain close, as opposed to running, where the difference increases exponentially. Thus, our fat 60 year old can log his/her moderately well and move on with his/her life.

Rock Climbing/Bouldering – Sport. Yeah, our guy would be dead. Fat and rock climbing/bouldering go together like…. uh, fat and… modeling. I don’t know. Two things that don’t go together very well. Cut me some slack, I’ve run out of coffee.

Rowing – Game. This one’s not so easy. Could a fat 60 year old row well. Yes, and with great power. Would his/her girth keep him/her from our “moderately well” standard? We say no, not if he/she were an experienced rower. This one definitely toes the border between sport and game, though. But hey, the rules are the rules… hard and fast. Just like me. Except for fast. Sometimes… depends what we’re talking about. Let’s just move on.

Rugby – Sport. Sure, Rugby (both League and Union) has its’ fat guys, but they’re not really fat guys, they’re just sports fat guys. You know, the kind of guy that drinks all night and doesn’t pay any attention to what he puts in his body… fish & chips, meat pies, etc… But they’re not really fat, not by society’s standards, at least. They’re just sports fat. Our 60 year old is society fat, plus, you know, he’s 60. He might hold his own in a scrum, but otherwise, it’s back to the hospital with him.

Running – Sport. Including sprints, marathons, hurdles, etc… And we’re moving on.

Sailing – Game. Now, we certainly don’t want to downplay what they do, but could a fat 60 year old be part of a winning team? You betcha. Could he win an individual competition? Unlikely, but could we expect him to do reasonably well? Were he a former champion, yes, we could. And I’m sticking with it, no matter how many hateful emails I get.

Shooting – Game. Encompassing sporting clays, skeet and trap shooting, our fat 60 year old is already moving into the semifinals.

Shot Put – Game. Our fat 60 year old is excited to try this one out. No running, no jumping, just sheer strength. And it says here they’ll fare at least moderately well.

Shuffleboard – Game. Funny story, our fat 60 year old is actually the reigning world shuffleboard champion. True story.

Skateboarding – Sport. We’re eagerly anticipating our fat 60 year old’s turn on the half-pipe. We’re guessing the judges don’t throw the term “moderately well” around. Maybe something more along the lines of “OH MY GOD! CALL 9-1-1!!!”

Ski Jump – Game. The ski jump, as opposed to downhill skiing, requires very little active resistance to gravity. Gravity hurls it’s participants down the ramp, a small, quick, powerful burst of the legs when the ramp turns up, then it’s all about holding your form. Our fat 60 year old, a former ski jumper, could handle this sort of thing, and his performance would be deemed “moderately well,” grammar be damned.

Snowboarding – Sport. And this includes virtually every form of snowboarding sport there is, whether it be boardercross, halfpipe, big air, slopestyle or simply racing. Now, some of them do start to creep into game territory… for instance, our fat 60 year old could get good air, and maybe perform enough tricks to fare moderately well… but we doubt it. And the rest of the events would leave him/her at the ski lodge in a full body cast… so yeah, we’re going sport.

Speed Skating – Sport. It’s a matter of sheer physics, really. As our fat 60 year old made a turn, provided he/she had any sort of speed built up, the centrifugal force would carry him/her into the boards, everytime… partly because their mass would be difficult to stop/turn, and also because their older legs wouldn’t be able to do it. I like to call it the “law of hilarious crashes where hopefully nobody gets hurt”. I am having some trouble getting it to stick. Maybe you guys can help me out? Spread the word. Spread the love.

Soccer/Football/Calcio/Futbol – Sport. Sure, lots of fat 60 year olds play soccer, but have you watched them? Let’s just say that their version is a sedentary one, rife with mis-kicks, hand-balls, shin-shots, beer and singing. OK, so it’s not that much different than the EPL… but just enough that our fat 60 year old narrowly fails the test.

Softball – Game. Though really, the way women play it, it’s a sport. But the way the vast majority of people play it, it’s barely a game. More like a mixer, or a party, or something between grilling and horseshoes. Our fat 60 year old is right at home.

Surfing – Sport. First of all, fat, in the surfing world, means shark food. Second, well, let’s go back to physics. The best surfers don’t sit too far down in the water. They skim the surface. Fat means skimming becomes more difficult… means jumps don’t look as good… means tubes aren’t properly navigated… means “moderately well” is out of the picture.

Swimming – Sport. Unless you consider drowning a success, in which case, you need to go talk to someone. Seriously.

Table Tennis – Game. To play at the highest level, with the best of the best, you cannot be fat, or 60. It takes hummingbird-like reflexes that, let’s face it, have left our fat 60 year old over time. But to play the game moderately well? Our fat 60 year old can handle that, especially if he/she has history in the game.

Tennis – Sport. It’s like table tennis, if the table were expanded to 10 times it’s normal size and you got on top of it. This means 10 times more ground to cover for our fat 60 year old. That’s about 9 times too much.

Triathlon – Sport. Maybe if the swim were 25 yards, the bike 1/4 of a mile, and the run 30 steps… maybe, our fat 60 year old could fight his/her way into the “moderately well” category. Anything more and he/she suffers a stroke.

Ultimate Frisbee – Sport. That’s right. Ultimate has moved out of the realm of hippies and stoners and been taken over by real athletes. The amount of athleticism required to catch the many errant throws that occur alone dooms our fat 60 year old (and if you don’t believe me, check out the photo if you hover over “ultimate frisbee”, or this one).

Volleyball – Sport. If we’re talking water volleyball, our 60 year old might stand a chance. But beach, or indoor? Uh, no. Even if he/she were 7′0″ tall, his/her lack of quicks would doom him/her. Plus, that’s not even an insurmountable heighth these days when it comes to volleyball. No, we’re quite sure our fat 60 year old would be humiliated.

Water Polo – Sport. Treading water is an underestimated exercise. It’s exhausting. Trust me. Ed Honcho spent his formative years as a lifeguard (what did you expect?), where part of the certification process was to hold a brick over your head and tread water for 1 minute. Go ahead and try it, we’ll wait… no? Pansies. What you’d find is that it’s not the sort of thing a fat 60 year old should be attempting under any circumstances, brick or no. Though, I will admit, it might come in handy during a lifeguard certification class, as you would most certainly be dragging them off the bottom of the pool, maybe putting them on a backboard, and potentially administering a little mouth-to-mouth. Three birds with one stone. I’m surprised they haven’t thought of this one yet. What I’m not surprised about, is that I have.

Waterskiing – Sport. Have you seen some of the things these people do? Yes? Can you imagine a fat 60 year old doing any of them? Yes, but only poorly, and quickly followed by a horrible wipeout? Me too!

Weightlifting – Game. Plenty of fat people excel at weightlifting… remember, fat people can be very strong, whether they be 20, 40, 60 or 80 years old.

Wrestling – Sport/Game. Truly, in wrestling moreso than any other sport, it depends on the discipline. Freestyle or Collegiate wrestling is a sport. Fat 60 year olds would get twisted into pretzels. Greco-Roman wrestling is a game, since it relies almost solely on upper body strength, which a fat 60 year old might have in spades… or, at least enough to fare moderately well. Submission wrestling is a sport, as a fat 60 year old wouldn’t have the speed to contain someone at the top of their game… not to mention someone at an average level of their game. Arm wrestling is a game, which should be patently obvious to anyone but the dullest of minds. Sumo wrestling is a sport, as, though our 60 year old is fat… that gives him no advantages. Instead, it’s about quickness at that size, something that puts our 60 year old at a decided disadvantage. And, of course, professional wrestling is neither a game or a sport, it’s what we like to call “acting” in the business.

So there you have it… I would normally spend the next few hours waxing poetic about my prophetic… ness. But it does appear as if our fat 60 year old is in need of immediate attention. What do eyes rolled back in the head usually mean? Is that bad? Yeah. OK, I gotta go. Spread the word people. Let’s make this stuff fact. Oh, and if you want to send any particularly hateful emails my way, sure, I can take it. Just send it to icanbesurprisinglysensitive@edhoncho.com. Yo.

La pose de différents piercings sur le gland est parfois considérée comme érotique, voire stimulante lors de la pénétration.

vibrator wands, such as the hitachi magic wand, are large vibrators that generally plug into a wall (versus operating on battery power) and are marketed as back massagers. Cyberskin is a thermal plastic elastomer. Mais visiblement il y en a à qui c’est arrivé puisqu’ils les reproduisent pour en faire des godemichets!

The toy can be heated or chilled before use. Même si la pénétration anale ne vous inspire pas car ce n’est pas quelque chose de naturel, vous changerez d’avis en testant un plug et serez surpris de la palette de sensations qu’il vous fera ressentir. Le sextoy anal sur la photo ci- contre a quelque chose d’original par rapport aux masturbateur classiques : vous pourrez régler la force de succion afin d’avoir un anus plus ou moins étroit.

Ne sèchent presque pas, ce qui permet de vous consacrer à votre partenaire aussi longtemps que vous voulez, sans avoir besoin de s’arrêter pour relubrifier. Les jouets sexuels n'incluent ni la contraception, ni la pornographie, ni les préservatifs ou les digues dentaires. Les lubrifiants à base d’eau sont les plus flexibles : ils n’endommageront pas les préservatifs, se lavent facilement et ne laissent aucune traces sur vos textiles.

Cyberskin is made from ingredients on fda approved lists and it does not contain phthalates, polyvinyl chloride (pvc), heavy metals or latex. Cette féminisation s’accompagne, chez ses promoteurs, d’une mise à distance de la pornographie, pratique typiquement masculine, jugée sale et malsaine (une ancienne responsable de magasin déclare par exemple : « on refusait de vendre des représentations basiques du pénis. Le but de son utilisation est semblable à celle d'un cockring.

Les anneaux à tétons sont une famille d'outils qui appliquent une pression aux mamelons.

Comment bien choisir son lubrifiant pour bien choisir le lubrifiant selon vos besoins, il vous faudra respecter 4 critères: la matière : la matière jouera énormement sur la sensation ressentie lors de l’acte. Avoir son anus ornée d’une rose, d’un dauphin ou simplement d’un cristal est non seulement orginal mais également prompt à susciter l’imagination de votre partenaire! Il vous faut le jack rabbit, dont charlotte ne peut plus se passer dans sex and the city!

The g-spot vibrator is curved at one end to facilitate stimulation of the female g-spot. Optez pour les animaux coquins! Elles sont destinées à être introduites dans le vagin et portées lors des activités journalières.

Image grandeur nature d'une star du porno ou d'animes (ils sont aussi dotés de temps en temps d'un orifice pour stimuler la verge). Artificial vaginas, also known as pocket pussies, vaginas or masturbators, are modeled to accept a penis. Le rosebud est un bijou anal qui appuie sur la partie interne du vagin comprimant ainsi le sexe lors de jeux érotiques.

On peut aussi utiliser un sex toy seule. Les grosses machines de plaisir ressemblent davantage à des machines de torture dans leur apparence. En forme de carotte, cigare, ou tout simplement pénis, c'est une valeur sûre.

Ce sont des chercheurs hollandais qui ont réussi ce pari incroyable de faire vibrer de la glace! Vous pouvez lui attacher les bras dans le dos ou pour plus de confort, allongé sur un lit, les menottes reliées à un des barreaux du lit. Je conseillerais donc aux femmes qui ne lubrifient pas beaucoup d’employer un lubrifiant avant de jouer avec leur godemiché ou leur vibromasseur.

anal beads in practice anal beads are balls or bumps on a string or a semi-rigid wand.

Fall has arrived and Bob’s 47 Oktoberfest has tempted Savor’s taste buds.

How could we resist this seasonal lager? It’s maltiness can stand up to stronger flavors so Savor rolled a ball of spice cake and local pumpkin, enrobed it in smooth white chocolate and topped it with a c

Oktoberfest Beer Boules (featuring Bob's 47 of Boulevard Brewery)

ute fall leaf. We bet you noticed its sexy picture on our Savor profile pic on Facebook!

We’re hoping it caught the eyes of the Boulevard crew. After all, this love affair is a fling of fall because Bob’s 47 Oktoberfest is just around for a few months.

Don’t worry – Savor will move along to another crush, but we might stick with our spice fetish…. anyone for a Nutcracker ale? Either way, any of Boulevard’s smashing classic beers is a lovely accompaniment to Cake Boules (regardless of the flavor).

Check out Boulevard’s tasting notes when you are snacking on a Beer Boule or pairing it with another Savor favorite: http://www.blvdbeer.com/bobs47.htm

N’était qu’un grand jeu à dégommer les statues

Julien: «Ça vous dit de jouer aux boules?»
Franck: «Ouais ça pourrait être bien! Tu connais ça le jeu des boules Boubou?»
Boubou: «Ben je penses ont a pas la même version de jeu de boules…»

*************************

Ce que les Français appelent «Jouer aux boules» est en fait jouer à la pétanque. Et n’aller surtout pas dire que c’est «pépère» ou «ringard» puisqu’il s’agit d’un sport national.. et croyez moi, ils savent jouer! Sauf Fred…

Nice weekend? For the first time in a long while I managed to miss London Open House, thanks to a combination of laziness and Other Things Happening, although I did go to a great wedding reception in an LOH venue, Greenwich Yacht Club, which is a terrific little place – great views up and down the river – and comes highly recommended.

I also found myself playing pétanque in Deptford. No, seriously. The court, in Charlotte Turner Gardens, off Caravel Mews and Macmillan Street, only opened a couple of months ago, and I ambled along for a little Greenwich and Lewisham Green parties get-together. I hadn’t played since I was a child, but found myself enjoying it much more than I expected, although I wouldn’t exactly call myself world-class…

Anyhow, while we were playing, a chap ambled up to us and said it was the first time he’d seen anyone use the court – which is a shame, because it’s a fun game and quite easy to pick up. Boules can be hired from the Dog and Bell pub in nearby Prince Street, which also has loads of great real ales and a damn good Sunday night pub quiz. So, if you’re at a loose end and fancy stooping around like an old Frenchman while the weather’s still warm enough – you know where to go.

Dialogues de la vidéo : c’est ici !

C’EST QUOI LA PÉTANQUE OU LE JEU DE BOULES ?

La pétanque -ou “le jeu de boules” comme l’appelle la majorité des français- se joue avec des boules en acier de 650 à 800 grammes, diamètre de 7,05 à 8 centimètres ; et un cochonnet ou bouchon (mots populaires – “bouchon” étant plus méridional) ou un but (mot professionnel) : une petite boule en bois, plus exactement en buis de 2,5 cm à 3,5 cm.

Je vous conseille de jeter un oeil sur ce site de “La boule bleue” (fabricant de boules de pétanque). L’histoire du jeu de pétanque y est racontée très bien.

A COMBIEN ON JOUE ET QU’ELLES SONT LES RÈGLES ?

Les règles du jeu sont assez simples mais ce jeu demande de la concentration et de l’adresse. On lance le cochonnet d’abord et l’objectif est de se placer le plus près possible avec ses boules près du cochonnet en pointant, dégommant, faisant des carreaux sur les boules des adversaires. 

La pétanque, contrairement à la vidéo ci-dessus (qui est le “jeu provençal”- voir en fin d’article), se joue à l’arrêt, les pieds joints. On trace un rond sur le sol entre 30 et 50 centimètres, et on commence à jouer. Pétanque veut dire en langue occitane : pèd = pieds  et tancar : stopper

Essayez de jouer aux boules sur votre ordinateur !

Avec combien de personnes peut-on jouer à ce jeu ?  A 2 en “tête à tête”, à 4 “en doublette” 2 contre 2, ou à 6 “en triplette” 3 contre 3…si vous voulez en savoir plus sur les règles qui sont simples, je vous renvoie à nouveau vers le site “La boule bleue”!

C’est un jeu convivial qui a l’avantage de faire participer toute la famille du plus jeune au plus vieux. Bonne ambiance assurée !

Pour tous les âges je vous dis même à 105 ans ! Interview de la vielle dame c’est là !

 C’est aussi un jeu reconnu comme un sport avec des compétitions internationales. Il a été introduit par les Romains sur notre sol en Gaule -ancien nom de la France-  (après être passé par l’Egypte et la Grèce). A travers l’histoire, les boules ont été en argile, en pierre, en bois et maintenant en acier.

LE VOCABULAIRE PARTICULIER À LA PÉTANQUE

TU TIRES OU TU POINTES ?

POINTER

C’est lancer la boule avec adresse pour s’approcher au plus près du cochonnet. On est dans le cercle tracé au sol et on lance sa boule accroupi ou debout

 TIRER

C’est lancer la boule avec force en visant une boule particulièrement de façon à la déplacer.

                                                                               Faire un carreau en tirant

c’est prendre la place d’une autre boule

comme ça ↓

Le texte du reportage c’est là !

“EMBRASSER FANNY ” – “BAISER FANNY” – “ÊTRE FANNY”

Pour le folklore et certains respectent encore cette tradition, si une équipe gagne par 13 points à 0 alors l’équipe perdante doit embrasser le cul de Fanny . Il s’agit de faire un bisou sur la représentation des fesses de Fanny en statuette ou sur un tableau. Mais pour en savoir plus sur cette étrange habitude  je vous laisse lire l’origine de cette habitude qui ne vient pas de Provence et je vous propose de voir un extrait du film “Le temps des amours” d’après le livre de Marcel Pagnol.

Mais que vous jouiez bien ou mal vous aurez sans doute le droit de boire  “pastis” (ou le Pastaga comme on dit dans le sud-est) qui va avec la partie de boules (pour les non-professionnels évidemment). 

En 2007 

CENTENAIRE DU MONDIAL À PÉTANQUE à MARSEILLE 

Une vidéo sur le centenaire de “La Marseillaise” – le Mondial de la Pétanque qui se déroule tous les ans au parc Borelly à MARSEILLE (au tout début, ce sont des “people” qui ouvrent le Mondial)

 TOUT SUR “LA MARSEILLAISE” CETTE ANNÉE 2009

 Voir le site F3 dédié à “La Marseillaise” 

AUTRES JEUX DE BOULES MOINS POPULAIRES

LE JEU PROVENÇAL (PRESQUE LA PÉTANQUE !)

Le jeu provençal “la longue” se distingue de la pétanque principalement par le terrain qui est beaucoup plus long (jusqu’à 24 mètres de long) et la manière de lancer la boule. Là on prend trois pas d’élan pour la lancer comme dans la première vidéo ci-dessus.

LA BOULE LYONNAISE

La boule lyonnaise (moins connue des français) qui n’est pas la pétanque est un jeu de boules beaucoup plus sportif car il nécessite de courir et le rythme est assez soutenu. Je vous laisse découvrir la vidéo explicative ci-dessus.

LA BOULE DE FORT

Originaire de la région d’Anjou (centre de la France – ville principale ANGERS). Il se joue sur un terrain qui n’est pas plat avec des boules qui ne sont pas rondes et en plus AVEC DES CHAUSSONS (des charentaises) !! et surtout avec humour et décontraction comme tous les jeux de boules…pardon les sports de boules.

And oh what a party it was!

Jacob, the other PhD student in the research group, and his wife, had their birthday at the end of July (within 2/3 days of each other or so). So guess what they did? Organised a birthday party…WOOHOOO!

The party was at their house, in the garden (luckily it was decent weather ). The food was all home made(GORGEOUS hummus, great ice-cream…yeps…home-made as well)…even the TABLES were homemade…hehe. Yeps…as you are probably guessing, it was a great and amazing party…disappointed that they will be soon leaving London . But why am I talking about the party? I haven’t talked about arriving there!

So Linda and Irina (the two research assistants) and I had decided to meet at Victoria station to get a train from there (yeps…they live a bit far out…around 15mins by train). Irina and her husband were running late, so Linda and I popped in for a drink at Starbucks. When Irina arrived then we sauntered off to M&S to buy some stuff, and then on to buy train tickets. Off to catch the train…oh NOOO! It left just as we were going through the access gates (mainly my fault as could not find my travel card I guess :-/). This was already 1 hour after we had originally planned to meet, so we had to wait for the next one in half an hour.

One problem…who had printed the instructions to Jacob’s house? Hmm…no one? Oh well…we’ll see! We phoned him for the post-code at least as Irina’s husband had a mapping tool or something on his phone. One problem…not all the roads were marked on this tool! We had to pass through kissing gates we were told…but apparently our idea of a kissing gate was the wrong one…so we passed straight past them! After quite a bit of walking however we finally arrived.

Kissing Gate

OUR idea of a kissing gate

We arrived in the most gorgeous garden I’ve seen in London (probably cos that is the ONLY garden I’ve seen which can decently be called a garden? ). People had already gathered (of course…we were quite late ). But we immediately settled in. There were people from Tate and English Heritage (where the birthday couple work) and of course us from UCL. It was a good crowd.

And besides the food? There were also games…woohooo! There was badminton, croquet (we couldn’t understand anything of THAT…it just reminds me of Alice in Wonderland that’s it!) and even boules!

Croquet in Alice in Wonderland

And there was also a pinata! Having played softball Jacob pin-pointed me out to hit it quite early on…I managed to give it a few good whacks (maybe cos I could see it a bit? )…but being one of the first meant that I didn’t get any sweets…boohooo to that! Not a problem though…there was MORE than enough desserts on the table…there was the most wonderful pavlova…and remember…everything was homemade!

Well…all in all a wonderful end to the weekend. It was good to relax with the UCL people (rather than mainly meeting at uni…even though we get a good chunk of socialising there as well, what with going for coffee or shopping for groceries from Tesco or whatever together…or buying bananas )…and can’t wait to do it again.

Boulophiliste depuis 1996, à l’origine joueur de pétanque, le virus de ce sport m’a rapidement poussé vers l’histoire et les origines de cette activité.

Désireux de faire partager mon violon d’Ingres au plus grand nombre, j’expose depuis 2003 dans les régions ouest de la France et plus particulièrement dans les Pays de la Loire où je demeure et d’où je suis originaire.

Je suis également à l’origine de ce mot Boulophiliste qui a reçu, en 2006, l’aval des sages de l’Académie Française.

bienvenue sur mon blog "collection boules à jouer"

salon La Guerche 2004

salon La Guerche 2004

salon La Guerche 2004

salon Poitiers 2004

salon Poitiers 2004

]]> http://theyellowkid.wordpress.com/2009/07/23/yellow-carpet-solange-un-sosie-ti-tiny-louis-vuitton-mya-shaq-jay-z-fergie-pharrell-williams-nigo/ Thu, 23 Jul 2009 16:03:59 +0000 The Yellow Kid http://theyellowkid.wordpress.com/2009/07/23/yellow-carpet-solange-un-sosie-ti-tiny-louis-vuitton-mya-shaq-jay-z-fergie-pharrell-williams-nigo/

Attention, une erreur s’est glissée sur cette photo de Solange. Soit elle est sortie sans capter qu’elle n’avait pas mis sa perruque, soit elle a une maladie incurable foudroyante, soit elle fait une imitation de Boy Georges. Dans tout les cas, il faudrait que la mode de la tête rasée s’arrête rapidement, ou ce blog va se transformer en supplément détachable de Miss Ebène.

Attention, une erreur s’est glissée sur cette photo de Fabolous et Trey Songz, et je ne parle pas de l’illusion d’optique qui laisse penser que la meuf à droite fait un remake de l’accident de Michael Jackson (quand il s’est transformé en Ghost Rider). Je parle plutôt du sosie officiel de Rick Ross en bas de l’image, qui prennait du bon temps en soirée alors qu’il aurait dû être à la prison de Rikers, où il était attendu pour jouer une pièce sur la vie de Ross. Quelqu’un vient de se faire virer.

Attention, une erreur s’est glissée sur cette photo de T.I et Tiny. Une erreur d’environ 1m60 pour 65 kg, un piercing au sourcil, des tatouages sur les seins, un sac Vuitton acheté à Marrakech et un rocher lunaire en guise de bague de fiançailles. Vous voyez toujours pas?

D’ailleurs en parlant de ça, attention, une erreur s’est glissée sur cette photo de la boutique Louis Vuitton de Sarajevo. Ils auraient dû faire comme sur les Champs Elysées et intégrer un musée, ça leur aurait permis de défiscaliser et d’acheter la boutique Chanel d’à côté, que Zevs vient juste de finir de repeindre.

Attention, une erreur s’est glissée sur cette photo de Mya: elle a beaucoup trop de vêtements sur elle. Combien de fois il faut vous le répéter les filles, si vous voulez buzzer dans le R&B en ce moment, d’abord vous vous rasez la tête et ensuite vous vous mettez à poil. C’est pas compliqué pourtant.

Attention, une erreur s’est glissée sur cette photo de Shaquille O’Neal. Enfin, “l’erreur” s’est plutôt glissée entre les fesses d’un panda trop choqué pour comprendre qu’il est en train de se faire violer par un basketteur en rut qui se prend pour un hardeur, et se rendre compte que ce sera lui la star de la prochaine sextape balancée sur Internet. Dire qu’il ne verra plus jamais les bambous de la même façon.

Attention, une erreur s’est glissée sur cette photo de Jay-Z. C’est vrai quoi, depuis quand est ce que les chameaux ont besoin de boire?

Attention, une erreur s’est glissée sur cette photo de Fergie des Black Eyed Peas. A vue d’oeil, je dirai une erreur de 15cm, qui risque de dépasser à tout moment. J’imagine qu’en voyant que les paparazzis la mitraillaient, elle a dû avoir les boules.

Attention, une erreur s’est glissée sur cette photo de Pharrell Williams et Nigo. Mais qu’est ce que je raconte, sérieux? Si seulement yen avait qu’une seule.

The temperature was rising and the beads of sweat on our foreheads resembled the droplets of water running down the cold bottles of rosé. Above us, through the trees, whose leaves provided welcome relief, stood the Sacre-Coeur, its bells busy on a Sunday afternoon. Just across the steps a band played jazz for a large family barbecue and feral children invented their own adult-free amusements. The smell of freshly cooked sardines was intoxicating.

I am an ordinary englishman, I don’t know the international rules of etiquette. I am middle-class, I am taught that taking part is what counts, to try to win and yet never really expect to.

“It’s your turn l’anglais”, they say, laughing at the obvious drawn line of division.
“C’est moi?”, I reply, suspecting in my own head that my Hugh Grant-esque attempt to be continental (turned-up chinos and sockless loafers) was my subconscious attempt to hustle them at their own game.

In reality I was guessing; and my feet were bleeding.

I was no Wellington. I was apologetic, profoundly so. But my awkwardness had escaped me; perhaps it was the alcohol, perhaps the angels were on my side. Whatever the reason, I hadn’t meant to win, I was supposed to let them do that. Somehow I was giving the game away because I was too good; I was not exactly as I seemed. I had both planted the seeds of doubt and watered them and my daft impressions of shock were not sufficient at hiding the joy I showed when I got two boules points for the winning score. The clenched raised fist gave the game away…

Ok so a few days ago (don’t ask for the date, I’m not good with dates when I’m not keeping track) I took part in a photowalk with several English-speaking photographers living in Basel. We ventured over to the Munster to shoot the church. It wasn’t the most exciting of ventures per say, but it was good fun, and nice to shoot surrounded by other people. They were all duly impressed at the 300mm VR I dragged along. I got some nice shots with it too. Here, are some of the shots from the walk:

D300 + 300mm f/2.8 VR @ 1/320s f/2.8

D300 + 300mm f/2.8 VR @ 1/250s f/2.8

I really began experimenting a lot with point of view and depth of field on this walk. It was good experience. You’ll see it as a recurring theme here.

D300 + 300mm f/2.8 VR @ 1/320s f/2.8

D300 + 300mm f/2.8 VR @ 1/320s f/2.8

D300 + 300mm f/2.8 VR @ 1/160s f/2.8

D300 + 300mm f/2.8 VR @ 1/100s f/2.8

D300 + 300mm f/2.8 VR @ 1/400s f/2.8

D300 + 105mm f/2.8 VR Micro @ 1/100s f/2.8

D300 + 105mm f/2.8 VR Micro @ 1/50s f/3.5

D300 + 105mm f/2.8 VR Micro @ 1/320s f/3.5

D300 + 105mm f/2.8 VR Micro @ 1/125s f/3.5

D300 + 105mm f/2.8 VR Micro @ 1/80s f/7.1

D300 + 105mm f/2.8 VR Micro @ 1/800s f/2.8

D300 + 105mm f/2.8 VR Micro @ 1/1600s f/2.8

D300 + 105mm f/2.8 VR Micro @ 1/1250s f/2.8

D300 + 105mm f/2.8 VR Micro @ 1/800s f/2.8

D300 + 105mm f/2.8 VR Micro @ 1/800s f/3

D300 + 105mm f/2.8 VR Micro @ 1/400s f/3

D300 + 105mm f/2.8 VR Micro @ 1/1250s f/3

D300 + 105mm f/2.8 VR Micro @ 1/2500s f/3

And quite frankly, that’s all folks. HOWEVER! drop by tomorrow for another post because I took some smashing macro shots today, and I wouldn’t want you to miss them. Hope you enjoyed this little collection.

Mon coeur d’éleveur est complètement déchiré.
Depuis que je laisse partir mes petites boules de poils chéries.
Mais qui peut me comprendre à part un passionné.
D’avoir si mal au ventre de voir partir mes bonnes amies.

Elles sont mes confidentes et toujours elles écoutent.
Me regardant avec leurs beaux yeux pendant qu’les miens dégouttent.
Elles ont un air sérieux, je crois qu’elles me comprennent.
Elle devinent, collées contre moi, comme mon âme a de la peine.

Elles ne m’en veulent même pas d’avoir choisi qu’une quinzaine.
Elles me font confiance croyant que je leur ai trouvé un domaine.
J’avoue qu’elles ont raison, c’est là mon plus grand désir.
Qu’elles finissent leurs vieux jours remplis de joie et de plaisir.

Dites-moi, le savez-vous, est-ce une maladie mentale.
D’aimer autant ces animaux à en perdre la pédale.
C’est, comme, gravée en moi, une marque d’amour bien tatouée
Sur mon coeur beaucoup trop lourd d’avoir à me résigner

Elles si charmantes et douces, que dire d’leur affection
Tout ce qu’elles demandent en retour c’est un peu d’attention
Fragiles et à la fois fortes, pourtant une proie facile
Pour tous ceux qui veulent mettre leur précieuse vie en péril

Je veux le meilleur pour elles car elles m’ont tant donné
Un beau foyer douillet ou elles seront aimées
Ainsi mon coeur d’éleveur sera réconforté
D’avoir laissé partir mes petites boules de poils “adorées”!!!

AlgieVab juin 2009