Trash the dress
by S. INDRAMALAR
The Star
Publication Date: 21-12-2009
The winning shot that earned Tham ninth placing at The Wedding Photojournalist Association’s World’s Top Photographers competition last year.

There was a time not too long ago when, in the hierarchy of photographers, the wedding photographer was near bottom (if not at the very bottom). They came in after the leaders of the pack: commercial, editorial and fine art photographers.

How things have changed. These days, wedding photographers are a highly sought-after bunch who can afford to charge a lot for a basic “wedding package” – photos (and sometimes, videography) of you, your spouse and your friends and family on that grand occasion. Pre-wedding shots (engagement, registration, rehearsal dinner, etc) come with extra charges.

In the last couple of years, I have interviewed four wedding photographers who have (through their public relations people – yes, that’s how big they are) actively lobbied for their stories to be published. And, through the course of work, I have met at least five up-and-coming photographers who are just starting out in this lucrative industry.

In short, wedding photographers are hot property. To snag their share of the wedding market – the demand is always there – the photographers have to stand out from the rest. Besides taking good photos, they have to shoot each photo in a way no one else can or has. You know, be different.

The winning shot that earned Tham ninth placing at The Wedding Photojournalist Association’s World’s Top Photographers competition last year.

Emerging wedding photographer Edmund Tham did exactly that. Apart from journaling a couple’s wedding via pictures – he takes dramatic, candid and composed shots – Tham has taken his wedding photography to new heights by introducing a relatively new post-wedding concept (new to Malaysia, at least) dubbed Trash The Dress or TTD.

First introduced in the United States sometime in the early 1990s, TTD is a sort of post-wedding ritual; an edgy extension to wedding photography where an immaculately dressed couple decide to trash their wedding clothes to signify their commitment to each other. Destroying your dress means you don’t intend to ever get married again – ideally, that is.

A TTD photoshoot is akin to a fashion shoot; the creativity of the shoot depends on the photographer, says Tham who embarked on TTD photo shoots early last year.

“Some shoots see the bride walking into the sea or on the beach and that’s considered Trashing The Dress. I like to take it to the extreme. I have taken a bride in a dumpster, a bride in her gown sprayed with bottles and bottles of Coke, splattered with ice-cream, trashed in a greasy car workshop, a photoshoot in a wet market … and more.

“The idea behind this is really nice. It’s about the couple showing their loyalty to each other. After all, you won’t be wearing your wedding dress after your wedding, so either you store in it a box somewhere, or use it for a photo shoot like this.”

Tham concedes that TTD is not for everyone. “I only suggest it to couples I think are adventurous and are willing to try something different and daring,” he says, adding that the TTD photoshoot is not included in the standard wedding photography package.

So far, the response to TTD has been positive. “Many couples are curious. They find it interesting and they quite like the idea,” he adds.

Tham discovered photography as a teenager. While still a secondary school student in Kuala Lumpur, he worked part-time at a photo shop. He was a sales assistant to a boss who was generous enough to teach him the basics of photography.

“I loved it immediately. Soon after, when I turned 17, I bought my first SLR camera. It was a film camera, of course. I think it was the EOS 5. With my new camera, I started shooting and that was it,” says Tham, an award-winning photographer who was ranked ninth in The Wedding Photojournalist Association’s World’s Top Photographers index last year. Tham was one of two Asians who made it the list.

Despite his love for photography, Tham did not go to photo school. He studied graphic design at the then Alif College (now known as Alfa International College) and worked at an advertising agency for three years before deciding to become a full-time photographer.

“It was hard in the beginning. While I was working as a graphic designer, I did some freelance photography and through recommendations, I managed to get new clients.

“Initially I did all kinds of shoots to make enough money to get my business going,” shares Tham. He also advertised his work and services in several bridal magazines and in Weddings Malaysia, a comprehensive directory of wedding services and resources, which brought him a steady stream of clients.

In 2005, Tham started his own outfit – Edmund Tham Photography, focusing mainly on wedding photography. Recently, he opened eGallery in Selangor as a platform to exhibit some of his prize-winning pieces as well as the photos and videos of weddings he has shot.

Tham decided to specialise in wedding photography because “weddings are happy occasions”.

“Everyone is cheerful and at every wedding, I get to hear happy love stories. Weddings are a lot of fun and sometimes, it doesn’t feel like I am working,” he explains.

Despite being in the industry for close to a decade, Tham cannot afford to rest on his laurels because the wedding photography market, though not saturated as yet, is very competitive.

The number of up-and-coming and apprentice wedding photographers – many of whom are self-taught and highly passionate about their art – are impressive. To stand strong amidst such competition, Tham joined Signature Photographers, a professional wedding photographers’ outfit that strives to raise the standards of wedding photography in Malaysia by conducting workshops for potential clients (on how to select a wedding photographer that suits you, what is needed for a good photo shoot, etc) and interested members of the public. The members share know-how and sometimes even clients.

“We are all experts in different styles of photography. I am good at conceptual photography but I am not a master of candid photography. So, if I come across a client who wants only candid shots, I will recommend one of the members of Signature Photographers who is good at that,” says Tham who has photographed weddings throughout Malaysia and Asia as well as in Australia and Britain.

Tham does not feel uneasy about handing over clients to other members of Signature Photographers. “I am not worried. There is enough work for us all. We can only shoot one wedding at a time, so it’s better that we share the load.”

Signature Photographers currently has seven members: Tham, Patrick Low, Jason Victor, Zung, Jim Liaw, Alvin Leong, Saiful Nang.

One reason wedding photography has become such a lucrative business is because of changing consumer behaviour.

“People are slowly changing. The traditional way was to have your photos taken at a bridal studio. You still pay a lot of money but you can have your photos taken at your convenience … a month before the wedding or even a month after. It did not matter because they were taken at the studio and the shots were only of the bride and groom.

“Now, the younger generation, those who have studied abroad or who are educated and well-read, they want their wedding day to be documented in photos. They’re willing to spend a little more. After all, isn’t it better to shoot on your wedding day with all your family and friends there. It’s a once in a lifetime event for most people, and you have to capture it,” says Tham, convincingly.

On his part, to make sure he does not miss a crucial shot during the ceremony, Tham briefs his clients on how they should “pose” during their wedding. Even for “natural” shots, Tham believes strongly that some amount of co-ordination is necessary.

“Moments like the first kiss or the exchanging of the wedding rings, for example, are crucial and I don’t want a situation where the couple end their kiss too soon before I have a chance at a good photo. Or, imagine when they’re exchanging rings and the groom has his hand covering the ring. What kind of photo will that be?

“To avoid all that, I advise the couple to always pause for a few seconds so we can take some shots. When they kiss, hold it for a few seconds longer. When they walk down the aisle, look at their guests and smile. Just some guidance,” he says.

A good wedding photographer, Tham reckons, has to have a great attitude. “I think it’s important to be able to communicate and listen. You have to listen to your clients to find out what they want and what they’re like. And you have to be creative, of course.”

Avoid Drinking Fresh Sugar Cane Juice

Please take 2 mins to read this.
This email was sent by a friend whose father is working with the Ministry of the Environment in S’pore.

Health News – About Sugar Cane Drinks

A friend whose father works for the government health inspection passed on his info. Their job is to inspect all hawkers, their cooked food, their store hygiene, etc. They found sugar cane juice has the highest content of bacteria among all food. In fact, it has exceeded the set limit.

Hence, these guys had to find out why. They went round all sugar cane stores and watched the way the hawkers handled their sugar cane, wash their glasses, their entire procedure. But they couldn’t find the problem.

One day, they stayed till closing time and discovered some shocking facts! Whenever, the hawkers closed their stores, they would wash the floor with detergent.. As we know, the remaining sugar canes will be placed at the back of the store, vertically standing and as sugar canes are very porous, they tend to absorb whatever liquid around them. Besides the soapy water, the dirt on hawkers’ boots, cats’ urine, etc, will all be absorbed?? Now, whenever I eat at a hawker centre, I would warn all my friends about this and of course I stopped drinking my favorite sugar cane juice.

A friend, who loved sugar cane juice, was pregnant. She was always drinking sugar cane juice. Anyway, one day she miscarried and the fetus was already like 6 or 7 months old, I think. When the doctors did an autopsy to find out why all of a sudden the fetus had died inside her, they found traces of some chemical substance, which was found in cat urine. Large traces of it.

While it would not be able to harm adults, it was extremely toxic to babies, what more a fetus? So they tried to determine how this cat urine thing could have ended up in the fetus. This meant that it had to be digested by the mother, right? And the only logical conclusion they could come up with was that since these sugar cane juice stall holders just leave the canes lying around on the wet and dirty floor, it would not be impossible to think that stray cats could have peed on those sugar canes or near those sugar canes. So think carefully the next time you order that favorite sugar cane juice!

Please pass this on to everyone you know in S’pore & M’sia. Let’s take action to make this world a better & safer place for all of us & the generations to come..

EPF Rules that u might NOT know..
If ONE (1) of your Nominees in the EPF Nominees list dies, automatically the whole arrangement (EPF Nominees list) is VOID .. Meaning if, you only put in One (1) name & unfortunately he/she dies before you – automatically EPF will channel your EPF money to trustee of AMANAH RAYA upon your death. ( Eg : one of your parents, touch wood)

Even though if you have few names in the EPF Nominees list, – the whole arrangement is VOID & none of the individual names left in the EPF Nominees list will get their portion & automatically EPF will channel your EPF money to trustee of AMANAH RAYA upon your death.

Piece of advice – if any of the your Nominees in the EPF Nominees list dies, please do immediately approach the nearest EPF counter & present the Death Certificate of the individual & register your NEW / LATEST Nominee in the EPF Nominees list + NEW / LATEST percentage .

If, you & the other party (maybe spouse) involved in the same misfortune (accident / illness) that caused death to both yourself / spouse please, please, please alert your siblings / relatives / parents to immediately approach the nearest EPF counter & share the information within 3 days to AVOID all EPF money to be surrendered to trustee of AMANAH RAYA .

Upon surrender to trustee of AMANAH RAYA, your children will have to battle the money thru 3 channels;

Majlis Agama

Pejabat Tanah

Mahkamah

The normal period via above 3 channels usually takes 2-3 years (except if you have inside/tip top connection) at Amanah Raya.

Snatch theft turns fatal

KUALA LUMPUR: A routine trip to the shopping mall turned deadly for a 33-year-old man and his wife when they were involved in an accident believed to be caused by snatch thieves.

The man, Abdul Rahman Mohd Kalidin died while his wife suffered serious injuries.

They had just finished shopping in the mall at Taman Maluri, Cheras and were riding their motorcycle home when the tragedy took place at Jalan Perkasa 2, at around 3.30pm.

According to eyewitness accounts, two men in a Yamaha RXZ motorcycle approached them from the side and began to push them to the side of the road, said Cheras OCPD Asst Comm Ahmad Amir Mohd Hashim.

A life snatched: Forensic police examining the body of Abdul Rahman who was killed at Taman Maluri, Cheras yesterday. — Bernama
“It is believed the victim lost control of his motorcycle before crashing into a wall of a house beside the road.
“Abdul Rahman is believed to have died on the spot after suffering serious head injuries from the impact,” he said.

Meanwhile his 34-year-old wife sustained major injuries including a broken leg and is being treated at the Kuala Lumpur Hospital.

ACP Ahmad Amir said the case had been classified under Section 302 of the Penal Code for murder at the moment, urging anyone with information about the incident to contact the police or the Rakan Cop hotline.

‘Pied Piper’ Of Shah Alam Offers RM1 For Each Rat’s Tail

SHAH ALAM, Dec 25 (Bernama) — The Shah Alam City Council (MBSA) has also taken on the role of the “Pied Piper” and is offering a reward of RM1 for each rat caught around the Section 16 apartment complex in conjunction with its 3K (cleanliness, health and recycling ) campaign at the complex on Saturday.

Its deputy mayor Mohtar (Rpt: Mohtar) Hani said the reward was to serve as a motivating factor for the residents to go all out to rid the area of the rodents in the one-day campaign from 9.30am.

“We will reward RM1 for each rat’s tail brought to us in our effort to make the apartment complex, the first to be built in Shah Alam, rodent-free,” he told reporters after launching the campaign.

He added that more such campaigns would be held from time to time.

– BERNAMA

Taking a stand — P. Ramakrishnan

Monday, 21 December 2009 admin

Two years ago, I remember telling the folks who turned up at our Aliran celebratory dinner that we should deny the Barisan Nasional its customary two-thirds’ majority in Parliament. That majority was denied them in the last election. If only I had known that they would take my suggestion so seriously, I would have said, “Change the government”. We would have put a stop to the rot.

By P. Ramakrishnan (President, Aliran)

Our theme this year is “The struggle must continue — change will come”. Indeed the struggle must continue. There should be no let up. Struggle we must — if we want change. There is no option if we desire change.

But there are people who want change without the struggle. They fear that there may be upheavals when we fight for change. They want the good things to happen without stirring up the pond. “Don’t muddy the waters, don’t ruffle the feathers. Let things be as they are. Change will come”. That’s what they say.

But we cannot take any more chances. We cannot tolerate another 50 years of this rotten deal that we have been subjected to. During the last 30 years, the nation was almost bankrupted by reckless extravagance; the squandering of our wealth has continued unabated in spite of the Auditor-General’s report exposing unbelievable corruption and abuse of public money year in and year out; our fundamental rights are in danger of being whittled away very soon. Justice is no longer the last bastion for a remedy.

That’s why, the struggle must continue — change will come. But change will never come without a struggle. Let’s remember that.

Frederick Douglas, one of the greatest black activists of the 19th century who presented a strong case for constant agitation against all forms of oppression, said it simply and logically: “If there is no struggle there is no progress. Those who profess to favour freedom and yet deprecate agitation are men who want crops without ploughing up the ground. They want rain without thunder and lightning. They want the ocean without the awful roar of its many waters.”

It is a fact that the whole history in the progress of human liberty shows that whatever has been achieved is the result of struggle. Nothing comes free. It is as simple as that! And there are many issues that demand that the struggle must continue. Only then will change come.

There are too many restrictions that are unfair; there are many selective prosecutions that are blatant; there are many actions against dissidents that defy the rule of law. This is why the struggle must continue. Change will come.

If you cannot march for freedom, if you can’t light a candle for justice, if you can’t wear black attire to protest the death of democracy, if you can’t fast for a cause, if you can’t do yoga for your well-being, then the struggle must continue — change will come.

As long as our courts don’t deliver justice based on the merits of the case but continue to make a mockery of the judicial system as had happened in numerous cases, the struggle must continue. Change will come.

We wonder how the Court of Appeal could deny a person the counsel of his choice as had happened to Sivakumar, the Speaker of the Perak State Assembly. It is such an elementary thing; it is a simple question of natural justice. How could the learned judge ignore this simple principle?

How could the Federal Court dismiss the appeal of the residents of Kampung Buah Pala on technical grounds when there are substantive triable issues that should have been addressed and determined?

How could the Federal Court ignore the constitutional provision regarding the separation of powers guaranteed in the Federal Constitution in the Perak crisis? And yet the High Court upholds this provision as a matter of fundamental principle in Gobind Singh’s case!

Two contradictory judgments by learned judges that defy logic and bewilder simple folks like us! There have been occasions — and they still exist — when you can predict the judgments when the panel of judges is announced!

Likewise, when the royal commission that was set up to investigate the judge-fixing scandal involving V.K. Lingam found indisputable evidence against Lingam and recommended that action be taken against him and others implicated in this sordid affair, the police and the Attorney-General surprisingly found no evidence to prosecute them! Those shockingly implicated were top people in the judicial hierarchy. All these tainted characters were cleared in spite of what the commission had established after a thorough investigation.

This is why the struggle for truth and justice must continue if we want change to come. As long as information is denied and surreptitiously hidden from the public domain so that corrupt practices will never be known or exposed, the struggle must continue.

As long as the ISA is used and abused and Malaysians are locked away without being charged in a court of law, denying them the opportunity to defend themselves, the struggle must continue.
As long as foul means are resorted to in toppling a legally elected government as had happened in Perak, thus undermining the rule of law, frustrating the will of the people, demeaning democracy and ignoring the fourth principle of the Rukunegara which upholds “good behaviour and morality”, the struggle must continue.

As long as unscrupulous politicians exploit race and religion to agitate and inflame passions and emotions for their private gain and keep us divided as a people and as a nation through various discriminatory practices, the struggle must continue.

As long as the Election Commission does not conduct free and fair elections, providing equal opportunity in radio and TV time and insisting that news coverage should be without bias, the struggle must continue.

As long as selective prosecution takes place, putting the opposition at grave risk and danger as is the case on numerous occasions involving BN opponents, the struggle must continue.

As long as those elected by the people — be they BN or Pakatan representatives — as long as they do not live up to their public pledges and betray the trust of the people and do not pay homage to truth and justice, the struggle must continue.

The struggle must continue for change to come — and it will — but only if we persist.

For that change to take place successfully, it would take all of us and the rest of those who are the silent majority to make a stand. All those well-meaning Malaysians from the whole spectrum of society must decide that they can and will change the course of our history and determine the future of this country, where all of us can live in peace and harmony — before the articulate and aggressive minority make a mess of this country for all of us.
It is time we realised that there are those who lost their freedom, there are those who gave their lives so that we can be where we are today because of their sacrifices.

In a situation as we are in now, there is no room for neutrality. In matters of right and wrong, you cannot choose to be neutral. We must take a stand. We must be on the side of truth and justice at all times so that we can have the future we want. We must stand up and speak up.
The struggle must continue. Change will come.

This is a slightly abridged version of a speech made by Aliran president P. Ramakrishnan during an Aliran celebratory dinner on Oct 24 2009 at the Moral Uplifting Hall in Penang.

好震撼~~一定要睇~~仲要
請大家看後一定轉發。嚴懲這些畜.生。一定要讓上層知道，在中國還有這樣的事情！！！！！！！欲哭無淚。為那些無辜的嬰兒祈禱。同時詛.咒那些該死的畜.生永世不不得超生，墮入無間地.獄！！！！！！!如果是有良知
的人，請立即轉發。
東莞出現人食.人，“嬰.兒湯”擺上桌面，喪盡天良！！請看沒有人性的畜.生。
(摘吃.人肉 )
台 商最近流傳著一個駭人聽聞的進補潮流(嬰兒)湯。花三四千元人民幣，就吃到一盅用六七個月大的(嬰兒)燉成的補湯，台商則形容是壯.陽勝品。東莞王姓台商，自詡是(嬰兒)湯的常客，幾個月大的嬰兒，加入巴戟、黨參、當歸、杞子、薑片，加入雞肉排骨，燉八小時，很能補氣養血。他一邊緊摟身旁十九歲的湖南二 (奶)，一邊洋洋自得的說：以我六十二歲的年紀，每晚都可來一回，還不是靠這個。眼見記者滿臉狐疑，他自告奮勇，帶記者見識見識
第 一站，他帶記者到廣東佛山市，找到吃開(嬰兒)湯的餐廳，誰知主理的黎師傅卻說：排骨（他們的暗語，指嬰兒）不好搞，現貨沒有，胎.盤倒有新鮮的，這東西 不能冷凍，新鮮的好。黎師傅說，真的要吃那個，有個外地來打工的夫妻，現在懷孕八個多月，由於兩胎都女兒，再過幾天準備鹽水催生，如果又是女兒，到時候就 可以吃了

記者還是半信半疑，調查採訪幾個星期，還是聽的多，沒有親眼見過，以為就此打住，誰知過不了幾天，王姓台商來電：東西找到了，天氣轉冷，有幾個朋友正想進補

他帶著記者來到臺山，找到了餐廳，負責的高師傅帶著我們一眾人等，到廚房開眼界。但見那嬰.屍小小的比貓兒大不了多少，躺在砧板上，五個多月大，有點小。高師傅說著似乎有點歉意

高师傅说女婴.尸是朋友从乡下找来的，他不肯透露这女婴的收.购价，只说价钱是依据月份大小，死.胎活.胎而定

台商亦說，吃這一盅要三千五百元人民幣，其他細節，他不理了。記者聽他們在聊，流.產或墮.胎的死.胎，仲介人就包給產婆幾百塊紅包，若是接近足月引產的 活.胎，則要付兩千元紅包給女嬰的父母，當是收養；至於嬰兒交到餐廳時，都已死亡，之前是死是活，已無從細考了

這頓補湯記者無膽一嘗，經廚房一役，久久無法吃東西，佯裝不適離去。吃的都是女嬰，是一子政策之害，還是中國人好進補的習性，已將到天.譴的地步了!!!
不知道你們看到這個無辜可憐的女嬰有什麼什麼反應。她還沒有張開過雙眼看看這個世界呢！
人，真的可以吃.人嗎？？？······已經沒有救藥了！
一桌人圍著分食。真的想像不到，那些食客是怎麼下口的。他們在吃之前，難道就那麼心安理得嗎？我想，任何一個心存良知的人，都不會做出這樣的事情來。
這位據說是北京一個前衛藝術家，吃.嬰兒純粹是一種行為藝術。他自稱基督徒，並宣揚聖.經以及法.律都沒有禁止吃.嬰的條令。打著前衛藝術的旗號，卻做著喪盡.天良的事情!!!!

看見了吧!我們的同類就這樣上了餐桌,變成了所謂的壯.陽極品–嬰.兒湯!
挑戰你心理承受能力的極限!
看完此篇,渾身起了一層雞皮疙瘩!現在的人除了天上的飛機 、水中的輪船、陸上的機車，還有什麼不能吃的？！還有什麼是人不敢吃的？！年初義大利總統侯選者宣揚中國人用嬰.兒湯作肥料，引起了不小的轟動！也正因為 如此，我開始關注“吃.嬰” 的相關資訊，不曾想今天居然圖文並茂呈現在眼前！中國人要獲得世界的尊重和認可，還有多長的路要走？

Foetus soup is a rare delicacy which originated in Vietnam or China at least 100 years ago.

Ingredients & Preparation
To prepare the perfect bowl of foetus soup, you will require the following:

1x pregnant female
1x wire coathanger
some vegetables
some herbs and spices

Firstly, procure the foetus from the female. It is best to use a coathanger for this, as the standard vacuum-and-grind method of extracting the foetus will mangle it and render it useless for eating. You may now discard the empty female.

There is no need to gut the foetus. Place it in a bowl of water with herbs, spices and vegetables of your choice, bring to the boil and let it simmer gently for one hour. The resulting broth with chunks of dead baby may now be consumed at your leisure, either hot or cold.

Safe Sex

Un-safe sex

Are Out-of-Wedlock Births Morally Acceptable? Large differences in moral acceptance are also influenced by political ideology, which is related to religiosity.

http://www.bipolardisorder.tv/

Sexual addiction means any sexually-related behavior associated with compulsivity and obsession. Creating a healthy relationship would be quite hard for a person inflicted with this kind of addiction. The behaviors associated with this addiction hinder with a person’s normal living. Sex addiction is very different from having high sexual drive. A sex addict is dependent on sex. You look for sexual pleasure even from non-sexual objects. A high sexual drive is only associated with aggressive behavior when it comes to sex. People with high sexual drive do not necessarily depend on sex and are able to build a healthy sexual or personal relationship with other people. Sexual addicts make sex a priority over their family, friends, and work. Like alcoholics who could not stop drinking, sexual addicts are unable to manage their sexual behavior to the point of destroying their lives as well as the lives of those who cared for them.

The exact cause of sexual addiction is yet to be known. Nevertheless, certain factors have been studied that could possibly be the reason of this kind of addiction. the abnormal levels of sex hormones and chemicals in our brain such as androgens, dopamine, norepinephrine, or serotonin. Moreover, unusualities in the brain rooted from neurological conditions such as multiple sclerosis, dementia, and seizures, and medications such as dopamine agonists could also be a possible cause of sexual addiction. Changes in nerve circuits in the brain may also result in abnormal physical reactions to sexual activity. Psychologically, sexual, physical, and mental abuse during childhood could increase the risk for sex addiction during adulthood. Severe experience of neglect, rejection, and emotional trauma during childhood could also lead to an increased risk for developing addictions, specifically sexual addiction. Studies have shown that victims of abuse, trauma, and neglect may have low levels of certain chemicals in the brain that affect how they experience pleasure. Furthermore, according to mental health professionals, sexual addiction could be related to other psychological disorders such as impulse control and eating disorders.

Sexual addiction does not distinguish. Anyone could be a sexual addict. It could be a minister, physician, factory worker or an executive. It could happen to anyone from all walks of life. According to studies, people who are sexually addicted have come from families where there is already a history of addiction. This can be in forms of alcoholism, compulsive eating, and compulsive gambling. To take into account the factor of gender, there has no known difference between men and women. On the other hand, an interesting discovery have been found that sexually addicted women is increasing in number.

Behaviors associated with sexual addiction includes, compulsive masturbation, multiple affairs, consistent use of pornography, unsafe sex, cybersex, prostitution or use of prostitutes, exhibitionism, stalking, sexual harassment, and molestation. People inflicted with sexual addiction experiences little or no satisfaction at all from their sexual activities. They form no emotional bond with his or her partner. These people view sex as a getaway from stress, boredom, anxiety, and emotional strain. With sex, the addict feels powerful and desirable.

Usually, a sexual addict is in denial that he/she is an addict. These people typically feel tremendous guilt and shame about their out-of-control behavior. These people exist in constant fear of discovery. So, they deny their state and pretend that there is nothing wrong with them. As a result, we can say that the the first step to treat sexual addiction, just like any other addiction, is to stop the idea that there is nothing wrong with them. Then professional help would come at hand. Treatment is done with a therapist. As it is more of a behavioral and cognitive problem, cognitive-behavioral therapy is best to be used as treatment. To determine the causing factor of the abnormal behavior, a full history so to be conducted on the patient. As part of this cognitive/behavioral task-oriented approach, a sexual abstinence plan is constructed wherein the patient will abstain from sex for a period of time. After abstaining, people often report a sense of well-being, a restored sense of dignity and hope for a future free of sexually compulsive behaviors. Once, the positive emotions and cognitions are achieved, group therapy is recommended.

Sexual addiction involves any type of uncontrollable sexual activity which can be a resulting factor of early childhood traumatic experiences. For an individual to recover, an individual should admit and identify the problem before the help of a professional.

- People with bipolar disorder sometimes feel hobbled by indecision.
- If you are not interested in foods you normally love, or are binge eating for emotional reasons, it can be a sign of depression.
- Worried for no reason? People with bipolar disorder sometimes experience irritability, anger, worry, agitation, and anxiety.
- Bipolar disorder used to be known as manic depressive disorder or manic depression.
- It’s a serious mental illness, one that can lead to risky behavior, damaged relationships and careers, and even suicidal tendencies — if it’s not treated.
- People with bipolar disorder sometimes experience inability to take pleasure in former interests.
- Doctors can identify the signs and symptoms of bipolar depression, hypomania, and mania.
- Studies report rates of bipolar disorder between 4% and 15% in children with one bipolar parent, compared to 0% to 2% in the offspring of parents who don’t have the disorder.
- People with bipolar disorder sometimes experience pessimism and indifference.
- People with bipolar disorder sometimes experience loss of energy.
- People with bipolar disorder sometimes experience feelings of guilt and worthlessness.

How to treat bipolar disorder
- Bipolar disorder needs to be diagnosed by a mental health professional, such as a psychiatrist or psychologist.
- Bipolar Disorder Therapy, this is known as ‘talk’ therapy.Talk therapy can help you understand and ultimately master any problems that hurt your ability to function well in life.
- Start antidepressant medications. Antidepressant medications are often needed to help alleviate the depressive mood swings characteristic of bipolar disorder.
- Take care of your body. Focus on better health inside and out to help cope with bipolar disorder. Start an exercise routine and try to get some physical activity each day. Eat healthy foods and avoid too much fat, sugar, alcohol, caffeine and tobacco products. Also, make sure you get plenty of sleep each night.
- Treat yourself to some relaxation. Make time for activities that you enjoy–it will help you to de-stress and cope with your illness.
- Write about what you’re feeling.
- Psychotherapy treatment often focuses on changing thoughts and behaviors to treat bipolar disorder, but additional counseling may help you deal with the experience.

Camelia (aka ecofren) shares ” I am victim of biopolar disorder for many years. Just recently, I have a happy life.I am free from depression”

Pineapple Shake

Ingredients
2 Cups Milk

8 tsp Suger

Crushed Ice

1 Pine Apple

Directions
1-Cut out the thick skin of the pineapple and cut into small bits.

2-Grind it in a blender and filter it to get the juice.

3-You may add the cut pieces to a juicer to get the juice directly.

4-To 2 cups of this extract, add 2 cups milk, 8 tsp sugar and whip.

5-Add some crushed ice if required.

Fish with French Fries

Ingredients
2 whole fish

½ cup lemon juice

1 tbsp vinegar

2 tsp garlic paste

1 tsp salt

2 tbsp red chilli powder

¼ tsp turmeric powder

1 tsp cumin powder

Directions
Make cuts on both sides of the fish and marinate with salt and lemon juice for two hours.
In a bowl mix vinegar, garlic paste, chilli powder, turmeric powder and cumin powder.
Dip marinated fish in the mixture and transfer in a baking dish and bake for half an hour.
Remove from the oven and serve with fries, cucumber slices and onion rings.

Lawyer: Najib ‘linked’ to Bala’s disappearance

Nov 25, 09 3:05pm
Any reasonable person would draw the conclusion that Prime Minister Najib Abdul Razak is somehow linked to the disappearance of P Balasubramaniam, according to the private investigator’s lawyer.
“The facts seem to point to the possibility that they wanted him out of the way and delegated this job to others close to them to execute,” said Americk Singh Sidhu (left) in an interview with Malaysiakini.
“As matters stand, I am concerned about the involvement of Nazim (Razak), Najib’s younger brother. The question is why would he have an interest in Bala’s disappearance if it were not to protect his brother?” asked Americk.

Balasubramaniam recently emerged from hiding to reveal that he had met Nazim, an architect, the night before he made a dramatic reversal and recanted his first statutory declaration in which he alleged that Najib had close ties with murdered Mongolian woman Altantuya Shaariibuu.

Balasubramaniam also claimed that he was offered RM5 million by one Deepak, a businessman close to Najib’s wife, Rosmah Mansor, to retract his first statutory declaration.
Najib had repeatedly denied speculations that he was behind Balasubramaniam’s retraction.
In the interview, Americk recounted how he was introduced to Balasubramaniam, on his reaction to the retraction of Balasubramaniam’s first statutory declaration and his subsequent meeting with the former police officer after he emerged from hiding a year later.

The lawyer also revealed that the video recording of his interview with Balasubramaniam three months ago was secretly taken as an “insurance in the event he was apprehended by the parties involved in his departure from this country over a year ago”.

“He did not know he was being filmed at that time but we did inform him of this later and he understood why we did it,” said Americk.

According to him, while Balasubramaniam may have committed an offence under the Statutory Declarations Act 1960 for giving conflicting statutory declarations, he could nevertheless defend himself against the charge as it “would appear he was coerced, intimidated and/or forced to sign the second statutory declaration under duress”.

But those who allegedly instigated the swearing of the false second statutory declaration – Deepak, one ASP Suresh and lawyer M Arunampalam – are also liable to criminal charges for abetment and conspiracy, added Americk.

“In so far as Nazim is concerned, he was involved in criminal intimidation of Bala besides a possibility of being roped into the abetment/conspiracy charges arising from the creation of the second false statutory declaration.”

The following is the first of a two-part interview:

Malaysiakini: When did you first meet Bala?

Americk: I first met Bala sometime in April or May 2008. I was having some early evening drinks with several lawyer friends of mine at ‘Fogles’, which is a delicatessen/bar at Plaza Damas. We were later joined by ASP Suresh and Bala.

One of the lawyers I was with, M Puravalen, introduced me to them. I had no idea who they were before that. I had not been following the Altantuya case very closely so I had not realised that Abdul Razak Baginda had a private investigator assisting him and this was Bala.
I then started enquiring about this whole saga out of curiosity.
Puravalen had been involved in the Altantuya case as he was the first counsel Abdul Razak Baginda had engaged before he was discharged and a new counsel engaged, and so he enlightened me as regards the more salient facts.

I am not sure how ASP Suresh featured in all this but he appeared to be a good friend of Bala’s and appeared to have his interests at heart.

Eventually some of the other lawyers left and the restaurant started closing so we decided to move on to ‘The Backyard’ pub in Sri Hartamas, which is only a short distance away from Plaza Damas. There were four of us … Bala, myself, ASP Suresh and Valen.

We were drinking and still discussing the whole Altantuya murder case as I found it fascinating. Sometime later (Subang MP and lawyer) Sivarasa Rasiah walked in. I know Siva as he is also a friend, but we are not very close. We asked him to join us. He also listened to what Bala had to say and after that suggested Bala get someone to record everything.

Somehow I was chosen to do this as everyone felt I was the one lawyer who did not have an agenda in this matter as I was someone neutral. I agreed and that was when I made an appointment for Bala to come to my office so that I could record all he had to say.

The recordings occurred about two or three times over a period of about two months and lasted a few hours each time.

How did you feel when Bala came out with the second statutory declaration? Did you attempt to contact him?

I received a call from a member of the press at about 9.30am on July 4, 2008 asking me why my client, Bala, had called a press conference for 11am that morning at the Prince hotel.

I was a little surprised as I had no idea what this was about so I proceeded to call Bala, who did not answer his phone. I then proceeded to make further enquiries only to find out that Bala had purportedly been represented by another lawyer, one Arunampalam who had spoken to the press at that press conference on behalf of Bala and had said that Bala was retracting the contents of his first SD as he had been forced to sign it under duress.

When I came to know of this press conference and what transpired thereat, I was absolutely flabbergasted. Bala and I had spent two months and many hours over the first SD to ensure it was absolutely correct and for him to deny the contents in the space of 24 hours did seem incredible to me.
Bala had anticipated that he would be arrested by the police after releasing the first statutory declaration and he told me so. This is why he had handed over his mobile phone to me for safe keeping before he left my office the evening before as he did not want the police to download information from it.

We were therefore preparing for his arrest and then to go to the police station he was being held at to represent him. I never expected him to have been ‘hijacked’ by the personalities involved, and I am sure, neither did he.

It is also worth mentioning here that this lawyer, Arunampalam, was not engaged by Bala to represent him at the press conference at the Prince hotel despite the fact that Arunampalam has said Bala called him and asked him to do so. This is a blatant lie.

Bala does not know this man and had never met him prior to that press conference. In fact, it is well-known that Arunampalam does legal work for Deepak and this can be substantiated quite easily.

There is no doubt in my mind that Bala was forced, coerced, threatened and intimidated into signing the second statutory declaration.
Bala subsequently disappeared for one year. When did you meet him next?

Bala called me around July 19, 2009. I was at that time in a little village called Llanwarne on the Welsh border staying with some friends of mine. My wife was also with me. I was surprised to hear his voice as I hadn’t heard from him since he left my office with ASP Suresh in the early evening of July 3, 2008.

He started off the conversation by apologising to me for any trouble he had caused. He said he was returning to Malaysia on July 28 and wanted to see me. I informed him I was only returning to Kuala Lumpur on Aug 2 and landing in the early hours of the morning. He gave me a contact number to call and I said I would call him after I landed to arrange a meeting.

At approximately 9am on Aug 2, 2009, I called the number Bala had given me and we arranged to meet in about two days’ time. We left the exact time and place to be decided later.

On Aug 4, we finally arranged to meet at my apartment in Ampang Hilir at about 1pm the next day. As Bala wanted to tell me everything that had happened to him since I saw him last, I thought it would be best to have some witnesses present and so I called my counsel, Manjeet Singh Dhillon and another lawyer, Amarjit Singh Sidhu. They both turned up at about 12pm and we waited for Bala to arrive.

Bala eventually turned up a little later than expected as he was having difficulty locating my apartment. He arrived with two other Indian gentlemen who were introduced to us but I cannot recall their names.
He then spent about three hours telling us exactly what had happened to him. During this time he was constantly questioned by myself, Manjeet and Amarjit.

We had arranged for a concealed audio visual device to record this conversation as we felt Bala may have needed some insurance in the event he was apprehended by the parties involved in his departure from this country over a year ago. He did not know he was being filmed at that time but we did inform him of this later and he understood why we did it.

Were you convinced by Bala’s story? What documentary evidence did you have?

After approximately three hours of conversation, we were more than convinced that what he was telling us was the truth. It took quite a long time to unravel the details as Bala was recalling events which had taken place over a year ago coupled with the fact that there were so many details.

At that stage, Bala did not reveal any documentary evidence as he was still very apprehensive of the entire situation but he did tell us details of all the evidence he had from bank account statements, passports, flight tickets and photocopied cheques paid to him.

We therefore asked him to produce this evidence and he assured us he would.

What was your advice to Bala at the meeting? Was there a follow-up meeting after that?

After digesting everything we were told, we felt it was necessary to record the events which had taken place in a suitable, chronological and coherent format as we were concerned the matter was rather serious.

We advised Bala to hand over all documents to us to enable us to further verify his story. He promised us he would but said he would have to go to his wife’s bank (EON) to get her statements for the past year and that other documents were still in India. He did however have copies of his family’s passports and copies of the cheques Deepak had signed. He eventually produced these documents to me by hand, by post and by fax.

We advised Bala to behave normally with Deepak and ASP Suresh and not to let them know he had seen us. He told us he would be returning to India shortly and would contact us again. From then on, all contact with Bala was by phone and email.

As a lawyer, do you think Bala has committed any offences?

Technically, he may have committed an offence under the Statutory Declarations Act 1960 by swearing a false declaration. By this I mean the second SD, not the first SD. However under the circumstances, he would have a good defence to a charge of that nature as it would appear he was coerced, intimidated and/or forced to sign the second SD under duress.

Making a false second SD technically exposes Bala to criminal prosecution. It would equally make the ones who instigated the swearing of the false second SD [Deepak/ Arunampalam/Suresh], liable to criminal charges for abetment and conspiracy.

If we refer to section 3 of the SD Act 1960, this states that SDs made under the Act are such declarations as are referred to in sections 199 and 200 of the Penal Code, and where false would be punishable under that Act.

Section 199 of the Penal Code reads:

“Whoever, in any declaration made or subscribed by him, which declaration any court, or any public servant or other person, is bound or authorised by law to receive as evidence of any fact, makes any statement which is false, and which he either knows or believes to be false or does not believe to be true, touching any point material to the object for which the declaration is made or used, shall be punished in the same manner as if he gave false evidence.”

This provision is then followed by Section 200 of the Penal Code which states that whoever corruptly uses or attempts to use as true any such declaration knowing the same to be false in any material point, shall be punished in the same manner as if he gave false evidence.

Even if we limit ourselves to these provisions alone, offences are clearly shown to have been committed by Deepak, Suresh and Arunampalam. Bala may well have a defense of duress but that would be a matter of evidence.

In so far as Nazim (Razak) is concerned, he was involved in criminal intimidation of Bala besides a possibility of being roped into the abetment/conspiracy charges arising from the creation of the second false SD.

Note also that under section 10[b] of the ACA 1997, it is an offence to corruptly give to any person an inducement in such circumstances as those in which Bala was induced to make the false second SD. Deepak, Suresh and Nazim could well be prosecuted under these provisions.
With the evidence that you and the other lawyers have seen from Bala and based on Bala’s own explanation, do you think the PM (Najib Abdul Razak) and his wife (Rosmah) are personally involved in this (matter)? Or was it done on their behalf by someone?

If you mean Bala’s disappearance, then the facts seem to point to the possibility that they wanted him out of the way and delegated this job to others close to them to execute.

As matters stand, I am concerned about the involvement of Nazim, Najib’s younger brother. The question is why would he have an interest in Bala’s disappearance if it were not to protect his brother?

Hukum Merayakan “Valentine’s Day”

Penulis: Al Ustadz Abu Karimah Askari bin Jamal

Hari ‘kasih sayang’ yang dirayakan oleh orang-orang Barat pada tahun-tahun terakhir yang disebut “Valentine’s Day” amat populer dan merebak di berbagai pelosok Indonesia. Terlebih lagi di saat menjelang bulan Februari di mana banyak kita temui simbol-simbol atau iklan-iklan tidak syar’i demi mewujudkan dan mengekspos (mempromosikan) hari Valentine. Berbagai tempat hiburan bermula dari diskotik, hotel-hotel, organisasi-organisasi dan kelompok-kelompok kecil, mereka berlomba-lomba menawarkan acara untuk merayakan Valentine. Dengan dukungan (pengaruh) media massa seperti surat kabar, radio, televisi, dan yang lainnya. Sebagian besar kaum muslimin juga turut dicekoki (dihidangkan) dengan berbagai slogan dan iklan-iklan Valentine’s Day.

Berbicara tentang sejarah Valentine, ada berbagai versi menceritakan tentang asal mula ajaran ini. Namun semua berita tersebut tanpa disertai sanad yang jelas untuk dapat mengecek keabsahan riwayatnya. Sekedar untuk diketahui, bahwa di antara mereka ada yang menyebutkan bahwa dahulu, seorang pemimpin agama Katolik bernama Valentine bersama rekannya Santo Marius secara diam-diam menentang pemerintahan Kaisar Claudius II kala itu. Pasalnya, kaisar tersebut menganggap bahwa seorang pemuda yang belum berkeluarga akan lebih baik performanya ketika berperang. Ia melarang para pemuda untuk menikah demi menciptakan prajurit perang yang potensial.

Nah, Valentine tidak setuju dengan peraturan tersebut. Ia secara diam-diam tetap menikahkan setiap pasangan muda yang berniat untuk mengikat janji dalam sebuah perkawinan. Hal ini dilakukannya secara rahasia.

Lambat laun, aksi yang dilakukan oleh Valentine pun tercium oleh Claudius II. Valentine harus menanggung perbuatannya. Ia dijatuhi hukuman mati. Ada sebuah sumber yang menceritakan bahwa ia mati karena menolong orang-orang Kristen melarikan diri dari penjara akibat penganiayaan.

Dalam cerita tersebut, Valentine didapati jatuh hati kepada anak gadis seorang sipir, penjaga penjara. Gadis yang dikasihinya senantiasa setia untuk menjenguk Valentine di penjara kala itu. Tragisnya, sebelum ajal tiba bagi Valentine, ia meninggalkan pesan dalam sebuah surat untuknya.

Menurut cerita tersebut, Ada tiga buah kata yang tertulis sebagai tanda tangannya di akhir surat dan menjadi populer hingga saat ini–‘From Your Valentine’. Ekspresi dari perwujudan cinta Valentine terhadap gadis yag dicintainya itu masih terus digunakan oleh orang-orang masa kini. Akhirnya, sekitar 200 tahun sesudah itu, Paus Gelasius meresmikan tanggal 14 Febuari tahun 496 sesudah Masehi sebagai hari untuk memperingati Santo Valentine.

Versi lain tentang Valentine dimulai pada zaman Roma kuno tanggal 14 Febuari. Ini merupakan hari raya untuk memperingati Dewi Juno. Ia merupakan ratu dari segala dewa dan dewi kepercayaan bangsa Roma. Orang Romawi pun mengakui kalau dewi ini merupakan dewi bagi kaum perempuan dan perkawinan. (dari berbagai sumber)

Namun yang jelas, bahwa ini bukan berasal dari Islam, namun lebih mendekati sebuah tradisi yang bernuansa Kristiani dari Roma Kuno. Jika demikian keadaannya, maka ini sudah cukup bagi Kaum Muslimin menyadari bahwa hal itu tidak ada hubungannya dengan Islam sama sekali, dan menyerupai kebiasaan orang-orang kafir.

Berikut ini, kami akan nukilkan beberapa fatwa para ulama yang menjelaskan tentang perayaan tersebut.

Fatwa Lajnah Da’imah (Lembaga Fatwa Arab Saudi)
Fatwa Lembaga Tetap untuk Pembahasan Ilmiah dan Fatwa Kerajaan Arab Saudi
Fatwa nomor (21203), tanggal: 23-11-1320H

Segala puji bagi Allah semata, shalawat dan salam atas hamba yang tidak ada nabi setelahnya. Amma ba’du:

Lembaga Tetap untuk Pembahasan Ilmiah dan Fatwa telah menelaah apa yang telah disampaikan kepada yang terhormat Mufti Umum, dari yang meminta fatwa: Abdullah bin Aalu Rabi’ah, dan disampaikan kepada Lembaga Seksi Amanah Umum – Lembaga Kibaarul Ulama (ulama besar), nomor: 5324, tanggal: 3-11-1420H.

Yang memohon fatwa menyampaikan pertanyaan yang teksnya sebagai berikut:

“Sebagian manusia ada yang merayakan hari ke 14 dari bulan Februari setiap tahun dengan hari kasih sayang “valentine’s day” (hari valentine). Dimana mereka saling memberi hadiah berupa mawar merah dan memakai pakaian berwarna merah, dan mereka saling memberi selamat, dan sebagian warung/restoran pembuat kue membuat kue dengan warna merah, lalu diberi gambar hati di atasnya. Sebagian toko ada yang memberi beberapa pemberitahuan di sebagian barang dagangannya yang berkenaan dengan kekhususan hari tersebut. Maka apa pendapatmu tentang:

- hukum merayakan hari tersebut?

- Membeli dari toko-toko tersebut pada hari itu?

- Sebagian toko (yang tidak merayakan hari itu) menjual kepada yang merayakannya sebagian apa yang dihadiahkan di hari tersebut?

Semoga Allah membalas kebaikanmu.”

Setelah lembaga mempelajari pertanyaan tersebut, maka lembaga ini menjawab bahwa telah ditunjukkan berdasarkan dalil-dalil yang jelas dari Al-kitab dan As-sunnah, dan telah sepakat umat ini atasnya, bahwa hari raya di dalam Islam hanyalah dua: yaitu Idul Fitri dan Idul Adha. Adapun selain keduanya dari berbagai perayaan apakah yang berhubungan dengan seseorang, sekelompok orang, atau satu kejadian, atau dengan makna apa saja, maka itu merupakan perayaan-perayaan yang bid’ah, tidak boleh bagi Kaum Muslimin melakukannya, menyetujuinya, dan menampakkan kegembiraan dengannya, atau membantunya dengan sesuatu. Sebab hal tersebut termasuk ke dalam sikap melanggar batasan-batasan Allah, dan barangsiapa yang melanggar batasan-batasan Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala, maka sungguh dia telah menzhalimi dirinya sendiri. Apabila perayaan yang diada-adakan tersebut berasal dari perayaan orang-orang kafir, maka ini berarti dosa di atas dosa, sebab menyerupai mereka, dan itu merupakan bentuk loyalitasnya kepada mereka. Dan sungguh Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala telah melarang Kaum Mukminin menyerupai mereka dan bersikap loyal kepada mereka dalam kitab-Nya yang agung. Dan telah shahih dari Nabi Shallallahu ‘Alaihi Wasallam bahwa beliau bersabda:

من تشبه بقوم فهو منهم

“Barangsiapa yang menyerupai satu kaum, maka dia termasuk mereka.” (HR.Abu Dawud dari Abdullah bin Umar)

Hari kasih sayang termasuk diantara jenis perayaan yang disebutkan, sebab ia termasuk di antara perayaan berhala Nashrani. Maka tidak halal bagi seorang muslim yang beriman kepada Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala dan hari akhir melakukannya, atau menyetujuinya, atau mengucapkan selamat, namun yang wajib adalah meninggalkannya dan menjauhinya, sebagai wujud menjawab panggilan Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala dan Rasul-Nya Shallallahu ‘Alaihi Wasallam, dan menjauhkan diri dari berbagai sebab yang mendatangkan kemurkaan Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala dan siksaan-Nya. Sebagaimana pula diharamkan atas seorang muslim membantu perayaan tersebut, atau yang lainnya dari berbagai perayaan yang diharamkan, dengan jenis apapun, baik berupa makanan, minuman, menjual, membeli, membuat, hadiah, saling berkirim surat, atau pemberitahuan, atau yang lainnya. Sebab itu semua termasuk ke dalam sikap saling tolong menolong di atas dosa dan permusuhan, dan kemaksiatan kepada Allah dan rasul-Nya. Dan Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala berfirman:

وَتَعَاوَنُواْ عَلَى الْبرِّ وَالتَّقْوَى وَلاَ تَعَاوَنُواْ عَلَى الإِثْمِ وَالْعُدْوَانِ وَاتَّقُواْ اللهَ إِنَّ اللهَ شَدِيدُ الْعِقَابِ

“Dan tolong-menolonglah kamu dalam (mengerjakan) kebajikan dan takwa, dan jangan tolong-menolong dalam berbuat dosa dan pelanggaran. dan bertakwalah kamu kepada Allah, Sesungguhnya Allah amat berat siksa-Nya.” (QS. Al-Maidah: 2)

Wajib atas seorang muslim berpegang teguh dengan Kitabullah dan As-Sunnah dalam setiap keadaannya, terlebih lagi pada waktu-waktu terjadinya fitnah dan banyak terjadi kerusakan. Dan hendaklah seseorang mengerti dan berhati-hati dari terjatuh ke dalam berbagai kesesatan orang-orang yang dimurkai dan orang-orang yang sesat yang fasiq yang yang tidak percaya akan kebesaran Allah, dan mememiliki peduli terhadap Islam. Wajib atas setiap muslim untuk berlindung kepada Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala dengan memohon hidayah kepada-Nya, dan kokoh di atas agamanya, karena tidak ada yang dapat memberi hidayah kecuali Allah, dan tidak ada yang dapat memberi kekokohan kecuali Dia Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala. Dan hanya kepada Allah kita meminta taufiq. Shalawat dan salam atas Nabi kita Shallallahu ‘Alaihi Wasallam, keluarganya, dan para shahabatnya.

Lembaga Tetap untuk Pembahasan Ilmiah dan Fatwa
Ketua: Abdul Aziz bin Abdullah bin Muhammad Alus Syaikh
Anggota:
- Shalih bin Fauzan Al-Fauzan
- Abdullah bin Abdurrahman Al-Ghudayyan
- Bakr bin Abdullah Abu Zaid

Fatwa Muhammad bin Saleh Al-Utsaimin

Syaikh Ibnu Utsaimin rahimahullah ditanya:

“Telah menyebar pada masa-masa akhir ini perayaan ” kasih saying ” (valentine’s day), lebih terkhusus para pelajar wanita, dan ini termasuk di antara hari raya kaum Nashara, dan semuanya diberi model dengan warna merah, baik pakaian, sepatu, dan mereka saling bertukar bunga-bunga berwarna merah. Kami harap dari engkau -yang kami muliakan- penjelasan tentang hukum merayakan hari raya ini, dan apa nasehat engkau kepada Kaum Muslimin dalam perkara-perkara seperti ini? Semoga Allah menjaga dan memeliharamu.

Beliau menjawab: Merayakan hari kasih sayang (valentine’s day) tidak boleh, ditinjau dari beberapa sisi:

Pertama: bahwa itu merupakan perayaan bid’ah, tidak ada asalnya dalam syari’at.

Kedua: bahwa hal tersebut mengantarkan kepada cinta buta dan kerinduan (kepada lawan jenis bukan mahram).

Ketiga: hal tersebut mengantarkan kepada tersibukkannya hati dalam urusan-urusan rendah seperti ini, yang menyelisihi bimbingan salafus shalih.

Maka tidak dihalalkan pada hari ini muncul sesuatu yang itu merupakan bentuk syi’ar terhadap perayaan tersebut, apakah dalam hal makanan, minuman, pakaian, atau saling memberi hadiah, atau yang lainnya.

Wajib bagi seorang muslim merasa mulia dengan agamanya dan jangan dia menjadi seorang yang tidak punya pegangan, mengikuti setiap ada orang yang berteriak (mengajak kepada sesuatu). Aku memohon kepada Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala agar memberi perlindungan kepada Kaum Muslimin dari segala fitnah yang zhahir maupun yang batin dan semoga Dia senantiasa menolong kita dengan pertolongan dan taufiqNya.

(dari Majmu’ Fatawa Syaikh Ibnu Utsaimin rahimahullah: 16/199)

Semoga Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta’ala senantiasa memberi hidayah kepada kaum muslimin dan dipelihara dari tipuan setan yang berusaha memalingkan manusia dari jalan-Nya. Amin

Ditulis oleh: Al Ustadz Abu Karimah Askari bin Jamal

Sumber: http://www.darussalaf.org/stories.php?id=1090

Can a devout Muslim be an Australian/New Zealander/ or American/etc.,and a loyal citizen?

I forwarded that question to a friend who worked in Saudi Arabia for 20 years.

The following is his forwarded reply:
Theologically, no. Because his allegiance is to Allah, the moon god of Arabia .
Religiously, no. Because no other religion is accepted by his Allah except Islam (Koran, 2:256)
Scripturally, no. Because his allegiance is to the five pillars of Islam and the Koran.
Geographically, no. Because his allegiance is to Mecca, to which he turns in prayer five times a day.
Socially, no. Because his allegiance to Islam forbids him to make friends with Christians or Jews.
Politically, no. Because he must submit to the mullahs (spiritual leaders), who teach annihilation of Israel and destruction of America , the great Satan.
Domestically, no. Because he is instructed to marry four women and beat and scourge his wife when she disobeys him (Koran 4:34).
Intellectually, no. Because he cannot accept the Australian Constitution since it is based on Biblical principles and he believes the Bible to be corrupt.
Philosophically, no. Because Islam, Muhammad, and the Koran do not allow freedom of religion and expression. Democracy and Islam cannot co-exist. Every Moslem government is either dictatorial or autocratic.
Spiritually, no. Because when we declare “one nation under God,” the Christian’s God is loving and kind, while Allah is NEVER referred to as heavenly father, nor is he ever called Love in the Koran’s 99
excellent names.”

Therefore after much study and deliberation …. perhaps we should be very suspicious of ALL MUSLIMS in this country.

They obviously cannot be both “good” Muslims and good Australians.
Call it what you wish ….. it’s still the truth.

If you find yourself intellectually in agreement with the above statements, perhaps you will share this with your friends. The more who understand this, the better it will be for our country and our future. The religious war is bigger and more complex than most Australians currently know or understand.

http://www.themalaysianinsider.com

APRIL 27 – It never ceases to amaze me how simple and trusting we Malaysians are.

We have heard all these promises before. Pak Lah, the Mr Clean and Mr Nice Guy of Malaysian politics proclaimed his great mission of fighting corruption after 22 years of unprincipled and largely unaccountable governance under Dr Mahathir Mohamad.

We lapped it all up, initially at any rate, and believed every word the spin doctors spewed out about Abdullah Badawi.

It was not too difficult a job for Abdullah Badawi, or anyone else for that matter, after Mahathir, to look ethically spotless, clean and pure as the driven snow.

Badawi, with his religious credentials, gave every appearance of being the reformer that this country had been praying for. Alas, his leadership proved a total let-down for Malaysia.

What began as a journey full of hope and promise turned very quickly into a national nightmare. Abdullah, who skippered the good ship MALAYSIA, was in truth an incompetent and inept rating playing at being Admiral of the Fleet.

We discovered soon enough that he could not tell north from south and a sexton from a pair of compasses. We had to put up with his erratic command, watching with increasing anxiety as he set the ship adrift aimlessly, with no prospect of ever making landfall.

Now let me move away from naval to boxing metaphors, and I hope I am not mixing them in the process.

Abdullah had come to lead us laden with his own strange stock-in-trade. It was a mix, in no particular order, of Islam Hadhari that he himself could not explain to save his life, the memorably inane “Work with me and not for me” catchphrase, and the almost absurdly messianic anti-corruption clarion call that he had used to fool the entire nation.

I am embarrassed to admit, on reflection, that he had me fooled from Day One.

Abdullah was persuaded by close family members and advisers that he was doing a brilliant job, and this was what he wanted to hear.

He believed that he had what was needed to punch above his weight. He did not realise until too late that the Islam Hadhari as he had postulated it was no match for the reality of Umno politics with its long-established culture of money politics (for which, read grand corruption), in-fighting and back-stabbing.

Soon enough, he found himself out-pointed at every turn by his own seconds, Najib and Muhyiddin, whose protestations of eternal love and loyalty made with a straight face before the disastrous March 2008 elections seemed the height of black humour.

They pushed all the responsibility for the electoral failure to him, and with indecent haste, distanced themselves from him. They turned collective responsibility on its head. This was their interpretation.

And now, they are now leading Malaysia.

I am recalling the Abdullah years as a way of reminding ourselves not to be tempted into swallowing the “right noises” that Najib is making, hook, line and sinker.

He is apparently good at developing popular policies on the trot, and all his reform promises seem to flow so effortlessly and glibly off his silvery tongue and that worries many people who are looking more for substance rather than form.

His 1 Malaysia is a case in point. How does Najib propose to give practical effect to his excellent concept given the reality of Malaysia’s race-biased policies of racial discrimination?

Does he not see a contradiction? Is he clear in his own mind what he is talking about? For now, it remains a slogan and, without a clear vision of what 1 Malaysia is intended to be, it could well turn out to be nothing more than a grand illusion.

Does he really believe that he has what it takes to reconcile Umno’s pathological obsession with bumiputra rights on the one hand with the principles of inalienable equality for ALL Malaysians on the other?

1 Malaysia without complete equality of opportunity is nothing if not a cruel and dishonest practical joke.

So, until Najib sets out his plan for 1 Malaysia that accords with the conditions for a truly “Malaysian Malaysia” (with apologies to Lee Kuan Yew), I suggest, in a manner of speaking, we do not put the champagne on ice as it could be premature.

Truly caring and considerate….

Truly, Amazing Thailand !!!!

1. A judge asked a woman on why she wanted a divorce. She answered, ‘Your Honor, he knew I’m a vegetarian n yet he still insists on putting his meat in my mouth.’

2. Woman: ‘Doc, an ant entered my vagina, can you please take it out’.
Doctor removes her panties and start making love.
Woman: ‘What are you doing?’
Doctor: ‘This is the only way to drown the bastard!’

3. Q: What is the closest thing similar to a woman’s period?
Answer: Your SALARY. It comes once a month last 3 – 4 days & if it doesn’t come you are in deep trouble!

4. A lady visited her doctor again, Dr. said: U look more sick & exhausted then b 4.
Are u having 3 meals a day as I advised?
Lady: WHAT? I thought U said 3 MALES a day!!!!

5. Women asked God to make The Penis Pretty.
GOD Said ‘No way; Now As It Is, The Penis is so ugly & U still Su ck It. If I make it Pretty You’ll Eat It up!!

6. A nun went 4 a urine test. The sample got mixed up. When the doctor told her she was pregnant, she cried n said,
‘Shit, we can’t even trust cucumber anymore.!’

7. A boy pulls down his pants in front of a girl & asked ‘ Do U have this? ‘
The girl lifted up her skirt & said, ‘ My mom said with this I can have a lot of THAT!’

8. Schoolgirl: ‘I do not want to take the SEX EDUCATION’.
Class Teacher: ‘ Why not?’
Schoolgirl: ‘Someone told me the FINAL EXAM would be ORAL!’

9. Mother asks daughter, how is married life? Daughter shyly says like BRITISH AIRWAYS.
Mother reads the ad & is shocked ‘ 7 DAYS A WEEK,TWICE A DAY, BOTH WAYS!

10. What is the STRONGEST muscle? TONGUE – It can raise a woman’s hip with just one lick!.
The lightest muscle? PENIS! It can be raised by a woman’s tongue!

11. Lady Immigration officer asked a Korean tourist: Name? Park Yu.
The 0fficer become angry & shouted back: FUCK YOU! Now what’s your full name?
Korean replied: PARK YU TOO!!

12. Man to wife: Business is bad, if u learn 2 cook we can remove servant.
Wife: ASSHOLE! If u learn how to fuck, we can remove driver, gardener & watchman..

13. COCK say to his two BALLS: I am going to take you with me to a party.
BALLS said: You big fucking liar. You always get INSIDE and leave us waiting OUTSIDE!

14. A baby dog asked mama dog how papa look like?
Mama dog reply: How I know. Your papa came from behind & I didn’t have chance to see his face’ !

15. What’s the difference between stress, tension & panic?
Stress is when wife is pregnant, tension is when girlfriend is pregnant,
PANIC is when both are pregnant!

Pham Thanh Luong (left) of Vietnam fights for the ball with Malaysia’s Mohd Sabre Mat Abu in the final at the National Stadium in Vientiane yesterday. Malaysia won 1-0.

25th SEA Games/Football:
Determination drives Malaysia
2009/12/18

JUST a week ago they were seconds away from elimination but a redeemed national Under-23 football team were the ones celebrating the sweet taste of Sea Games gold 20 years on from Malaysia’s last success yesterday.

Never mind that it took an own goal to settle an entertaining tactical battle with Vietnam at the National Stadium in Vientiane.

Because here are 20 players who carried the burden of a nation on their young shoulders and emerging with their reputation enhanced.

It was what skipper Aidil Zafuan Radzak called upon his teammates to do in a bid to prove to doubters that there is hope in Malaysian football yet.

“What proved the difference today (yesterday) from that 3-1 loss to Vietnam before was the team’s spirit and discipline.

“We have matured because of that experience and in just two weeks have grown from boys to men.

Pham Thanh Luong (left) of Vietnam fights for the ball with Malaysia’s Mohd Sabre Mat Abu in the final at the National Stadium in Vientiane yesterday. Malaysia won 1-0.
“Our desire not to give up and our hunger to end the country’s 20-year wait for the football gold was what drove us to this victory.

“Every time the coach showed us a video of that earlier Vietnam match, we became even more motivated. This is a perfect reward for the players, coaches and people of Malaysia,” said Aidil, 23, having led by example with a stellar performance in defence.

A half-time pep talk by coach K. Rajagobal saw Malaysia emerge re-energised for the second half when they wore down the Vietnam defence with their incisive breakaway attacks.

Rajagobal proved a master tactician against a host of foreign-coached sides in Vientiane, including Vietnam’s Portuguese coach Henrique Callisto.

“All I told the players was that they had 45 minutes left to make their dreams come true. We soaked up Vietnam’s pressure without cracking so now it was our chance to turn on the style.

“Our final pass was not good and we kept losing possession. If they wanted the gold as badly as I know they did, then they had to prove it on the field,” said Rajagobal.

And so they did, Azmi Muslim’s introduction with 10 minutes left for Baddrol Bakhtiar doing the trick.

Picking up the ball in his own half, Azmi drove through the Vietnam midfield and tried to feed Zaquan before laying it off for Safiq.

Safiq’s cross from the left eluded Zaquan Adha Radzak, which caught Vietnam defender Mai Xuan Hop by surprise as the ball bounced off him and past goalkeeper Bui Tan Truong in the 84th minute.

“We knew we could score because we saw the Vietnam defence was a bit shaky. I don’t care how the ball went in, scoring the goal was all we cared about,” added Aidil.