i love him every day, in every second but i realize sometimes, i love someone so much even if he doesn’t love my back. i’m still appy if.he happy..
But it made me cry almost every night…i really love him..but maybe he isn’t for me. . .

i gotta word to say, ,

F.U.C.K YOU. !!
* F ~ for “fun to be around”
* U ~ for understanding
* C ~ for caring
* K ~ for kindness
and ” YOU ” for being so special in my life. .

P.S : i love you

i falling in love the wrong guy . he had a GIRLFRIEND already and i can’t say a word . a word that i can say just ” OOUUCCHH”  it really HURT !!

i love him from the beginning i saw him, i search for him for over 3 month and this what i get ,  he make me fly till the ceiling then he breaks my heart make me falling from above the top to the down to earth . SH*T it’s god damn hurt .

i want he knows someday,,

” i love you from the bottom of my heart, i love you since the first time i met you, i can’t say anything, you make me smile, beside you my heart beat faster and my breath, oh i can really feel i’m breathing . maybe you don’t love my like i do, don’t even like me, you just thinks i’m a kid that just grow up. but i do, i do really love you . “

shit! it heard like i really want you and hope for you . but that what i fell . so what i supposed to say if that what i really feel .

HUFT .. i love him huaaaaaa~~~~ hiks,hiks,hiks …

“A heartbreak isn’t loud. It’s

as quiet as a feather falling

and the most painful thing is,

nobody hears it but you.”

HEART BREAK QUOTE ~

OMG ! just see the photo make me smile all over the hall .

 His name is Carl Craig Tumetel . he’s my senior at my training place .

 First time i met him is in the dinning room. i’m thinking about something then one of the security sit beside me then he comes to the table sit with us. i don’t really care actually .. i busy with my lunch and TV . then he chatting with the security named Mr. Sarwono , and after that Mr sarwono take me into their conversation so we start chatting, and when i first saw him, is the first time i lay my eyes and my heart on him .. i felt ordinary at first then when i came back on duty in the Doorgirl i start felt something different. i can’t forget him, i can’t wipe away him from my head. so i start to find out’s who is HE ??

i’ve been searching for him for over 1,5 months, it’s a little bit hard for me … until i finds out his name CARL . but i don’t know his fullname. till i said,” just the hell up, this guy is hard to find”

maybe in a month i just met him twice. and i never forget that i met him when i went home, i transit in Dukuh Atas from the Blok M-Kota shelter to Ragunan-PuloGadung Shelter. i saw him from the other side. He bring a skateboard and use a t-shirt and a Jeans. oouuhh that moment i really enjoy looking at him. my heart beat faster. even it’s just for 3 second meeting. just wipe out the disappointed for 1 month i never meet him again .

i never can say a thing in front of him or maybe when i see him. once, in the Sahid Corridor i met him, he came from other side of corridor. i’m shy, i don’t know what to say even i know him and want to say something to him even just “hello” or “kak ” but my tongue just like suddenly disappear.

then a few day ago someone texting me .  and that was him, i don’t know what to say anymore, i just cry , that is one of the happiest day of my life ….

well i don’t know what will happen tomorrow but i promise, i let you know .. !~

this a poem that i wrote for him . but i never want to give this because i am really shy to give it to him ….

“ THE PERFUME AS GOOD AS FLOWER IN THE MORNING,

THE EYES LIKE A DIAMOND IN THE ROCKS,

HIS LAUGH LIKE A SOUND OF A RELAXABLE WIND,

BESIDE HIM, FEELS LIKE STANDING IN THE BRIGDE WITH A FACE HEADED NORTH WHERE THE WIND COMES

MAKE ME CAN FEEL FREE TO BREATH LIKE A FREE BIRD AND SINGING HAPPILY

WHEN HE LOOK ME RIGHT IN MY EYES FEEL LIKE MY BONE DISAPPEAR AND MY TOUNGHT JUST LOST.

YOU MAKE MY DAY LIKE A PRINCESS IN THE PROM, LIKE A DANCER IN THE STAGE AND LIKE A STAR IN THE SKY .

YOU MAKE MY HEART BURN IN THE FIRE, FREEZING IN THE ICE, AND MELTED IN THE SUN .

YOU MAKE ME SMILE TILL I GET A BIT CRAZINESS IN MY LIFE.

I CANNOT WRITE A POEM BUT I CAN WRITE MY HEART. FEELING FLOWERING CAUSE OF YOU.

I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO SAY. JUST ONE LINE I KNOW ,,

I FALL FOR YOU IN THE FIRST TIME I MET YOU, I HAD LAY MY HEART ON YOU FROM THE BEGINNING “