Select your organization well!  Your well being depends upon it.

We all want to see ahead.  I am going to tell you that we cannot.

Yet we as surely as we court disaster when we get behind the wheel of the car when we have been drinking, we can run our organizations recklessly. You will get out of a car that is driven by a drunk, and you should aim to stay away from badly run organizations or at least to replace its management!

Let’s assume for a moment that you are one step back and you are choosing an organization.  Yes, choose. Even in a wicked recession, we choose. We choose which jobs we look at.  We choose which companies we research and approach.

Even as outsiders, there are 5 things to look out for to check the health of the organization.

These ideas are based on “systems theory”.  I hope any systems theorists reading this will comment.

One: We are continuously mindful of how well we are doing as a team and what it takes for the whole team to win

In plain language: Do people say “we” and do they talk about real things.  Do they say things like “In December, the market is slow for us.”

Do they talk in terms of taking everyone with them?  Do they make sure all the stragglers keep up and do they all cross the finishing line together?

Two: Everything matters, everything is connected to everything and connections get stronger with use!

In plain language: When you first approached the organization, did they start to “dance” with you?  Or were they stiff and rigid?  At the other extreme, were they hopelessly muddled?

Do they treat you like “white water”?  Do they work with the river and paddle gently or do they, at one extreme, fight the river [you] or at the other, not guide their canoe efficiently [be too relaxed and out-of-it]?

Is there feeling “give and take” or is the a feeling of force and rigidity or the opposite, no order at all?

Three: History happens once.  Nothing will ever happen again

In plain language: Do people in the organization tell a story of where the company came from and where they are going to?  Or is the company a skeleton of procedures without any flesh?

When they  talk to you about your story, do they attend to relevant parts or are they distracted by inconsequential details?

When something surprises them, do they ask questions or do they dismiss what they don’t understand?

Do they ask you how you would do things out of curiosity (and not as a test of right and wrong)?

Four: Birds fly in a flock without anyone giving orders!

In plain language: Are there 2 or 3 principles that govern this organization and are those sufficient to coordinate team work?  Do people point to the team work with evident pleasure?  Do they marvel that so much gets done with so little bossing around?

If you ask them what it would take to succeed on the job or fail on the job, can they give you 1 or 2 points or do they point you to manual that they haven’t read?

Five: Has the organization made unusual discoveries about what is good, true, better and possible?

In plain language: Do people talk about times when they were working as usual and then they stumbled over a new solution that was much better than they had done before?

Are they slightly mystified about how that happened?  That’s a good sign.  Mutation is healthy and it is only mutation when it is a surprise!

Qualify the organization

In sales, we only spend a lot of time on customers who need our products and services, who have the money to buy, and who intend to buy.  We “qualify” our customers.

We also have to qualify our organizations and move towards those who are healthy!

Rating an organization

When you talk to someone about a job, rate the organization on each of the five points.  How do they stack up on a scale of  0 to 25?  Try it and rate organizations that are right under your nose.  See if you haven’t got far healthier organizations right under your nose where you live!

Join up with people who will last the recession!

An inflexible organization will not last the recession.  And nor will one who is not organized at all.

Look for a healthy firm.  They will have the internal flexibility and mindfulness to adapt to the chaos in the environment. They will organize their affairs so you can grow. They will enjoy what they do and you will too.

Happy hunting and happy choosing!

Verändere die Zukunft, durch die Vergangenheit

translates as :Change the future, through the past

Movie: The Butterfly Effect starring Ashton Kutcher

The Plot:

Hero ,while searching for an answer to heal his emotional wounds,  finds that when he reads from his adolescent journals, he travels back in time, and is able to essentially “redo” parts of his past, thereby causing the blackouts he experienced as a child. There are consequences to his choices, however, that he then propagates back to the present: his alternate futures vary from frat boy to prisoner to amputee. His efforts are driven by the desire to undo the most traumatic events of his childhood which coincide with his blackouts. The actions he takes, and those he enables others to take during his blackouts change the timeline whereupon he wakes up in his new future. As he continues to do this, he realizes that even though his intentions are good, the actions he takes have unintended consequences. Moreover, the assimilation of dozens of years’ worth of new memories from the various alternate timelines he has caused  causes severe brain damage. He travels back to the day of his birth, and as a fetus strangles himself with his umbilical cord. A voice-over replays his mothers confession that he survived while three children before him did not. This, along with her screams of “Not again!” suggest that the fetuses of the miscarriages before him had the same abilities and ultimately chose the same path he did. The resulting timeline showing his friends and family ultimately happier without him.

Lets forget the tragic ending and other negative thoughts and lets simply focus on how you would like to change your future through your past! Would it not be awesome to go back in time, “redo” certain incidents that happened?

There is of course a price tag! You are responsible for such a “redo” and its effect on yourself and others concerned. An act of “redo” would be good in past but a small unintended consequence can have a disastrous effect on the present. This is indeed a great boon if at all one could do it, psychologically speaking your present determines your future, but controlling your past to change the future is very powerful and its impact is more severe and has far reaching consequences.

Let us assume, we have a separate portion on our brain called say the “butterfly” which would allow us to play with the normal thinking process any way we want so that we could go back and change any action which we felt we should not have committed at first place. This would put the phrase “past is past” inside the coffin forever. We would say ” past is future” from now on.

A comical take on such a thing was done in the movie Click , where you have a remote control and you could pause or rewind or fast forward life the way you want.

The central thematic issue still remains, why should  we live the way we are now, be happy get along with the present, forget the future, it would shape itself etc. Isn’t the society or the culture around it deliberately shunting the imagining potential of the human brain by quoting soft words which are bunch of bull?

Why should man believe in quotes like “past is past” “forget the past, face the present, flush the future” amongst other demoralizing quotes. Why the f&*% people are deliberately or otherwise tamed/domesticated to handle failures and say “it happens, its past forget it”. Why should people accept failure as a default option? Instead of living with failure and fear of failure why cant we burn failure to ashes?

is there any sane person here who would not want to go back , rectify past failures for good?

It would be a win-win situation if you have control over your past and future through it. Why should a kid be afraid to ride a bicycle again just because he tripped and hurt his leg the previous time he tried? Fear of failure is a byproduct of forgettable past.  Assuming I am a not-so-worthy person who happens to get a wife who is ever caring, gracious, charming and affectionate and marriage is facing a rocky road. A normal person would try accept that he is a junk , he doesn’t deserve this lady and he focuses more on repairing the road ahead. There are plan B guys who would not be afraid to go back rectify what made him de-evaluate himself so bad, “redo” certain actions and incidents and even before he sees pot holes on the road he would have laid the foundation for a flawless road ahead.

What if the sensitive dependence of future on initial conditions is more/higher than on present conditions, would it not be better?

The value of things which you lost in the past is astronomically more than the value of things you would “wish” or anticipate to get in the future. Is it not stupid to wish for something in future when you don’t know what is in store? It is far better to cherish/get back the things lost in past and hence have a future with less unpredictability. Why do you want to expect more out your future and inability to get what you want would again push you into dissatisfaction mode. The very fact that you lost some in the past would drive your future needs/wants. why don`t you put an end to the endless list of future wants depending on your present state of dissatisfaction, rather you can leave it to the satisfactory past.

Some would like to forget the past, few would like to change the past..

Chose who you are, if you have the power to !!

Herramientas ‹ Fcomena’s Blog — WordPress.

Another incident on the Bay Area Rapid Transit (BART) hits YouTube, and the world is once again asking the question if BART Police are using too much force, the police acted appropriately, or if BART passengers simply recorded a snapshot in time that could be interpreted at a later date. In the past, to find out what happened during an incident such as the most recent BART scuffle, you would be dependent on a newspaper’s beat journalist to hang around a police station. He’d get a copy of the official police report, perhaps talk with one of his friends on the force, and transcribe what he gathered.

Now news and media are real time. You can get Twitter tweets and video feeds from mobile phones, laptop computers, and reporters on the scene with CNN (or other international news sources). In many cases even established news outlets are starting to heavily rely on “stringers,” or freelancers to provide on-scene raw video for later interpretation by news readers. Nearly every news outlet today asks for viewers to send their “i-Reports” and videos to supplement news reports, and to reduce the amount of time from incident to broadcast.

A very different world from the days of Walter Cronkite, when the evening news would be a well-edited account from a distant reporter, formatted for the time allotted by network news, and face news competition by only a couple other networks (in the United States that would include CBS, NBC, ABC, and PBS).

The Biased Media

Media outlets have changed as well, moving from being a 5WH (who, why, what, when, where, how) style of reporting to networks such as Fox, openly stating they present a “conservative” point of view (Huckabee, Hannity, Beck, etc). This means in many cases viewers who prefer a certain point of view will be presented with interpretation of news events which support their beliefs.

It is also becoming more difficult to determine whether a news story is actually a press release or advertisement, rather than hard news. Even when a government organization or company is interviewed following some event or incident, the person interviewed is generally a professional public relations specialist, who may not find presentation of fact as a desired outcome of the interview.

Citizen Journalism Tends to be Pure

In most cases, when a freelancer or citizen records an event, they provide that record of the even in its raw, or pure state. If you see a home video of a tornado on CNN, then most likely the person providing that video is not providing commentary, only the video. When we were receiving near real-time cell phone video from Tehran during the recent violence following elections, most of the video received came out as quickly as possible, and was then processed in its raw form through venues such as YouTube.

All we really ask from the citizen journalist, to give their story or record of an event credibility, is:

• An unedited record or account of the event
• A reference of the event recording’s origin
• A factual context of the event (who, when, where)

We do not always need a deep analysis of an event by a reporter or analyst who’s motivation may be based on how sensational they can make the event, which political or religious ideology they should promote when presenting an event, or their own personal opinion. The main thing we need is context, and enough information to allow us to respond to the news if needed (such as during an emergency or other condition).

Media Changes

David Sasaki, in a recent PBS IdeaLab article walked through the changes in media over the past 550 years. Starting with transcribing bibles for the Catholic Church and aristocracy, and walking through the social changes driven by innovations such as the Gutenberg press, radio, television, and newspapers, Sasaki presents a very compelling argument for embracing change. Whether it be eliminating unnecessary reporters and editors, or better understanding the impact of social media and “publics” created through a global-connected community, we need to understand the dynamics of media change to develop a vision of how news media and information transfer may evolve.

In the 1960s you would watch even local news stations for the “Evening News,” and you would get a solid 30 minutes of reporting on national, international, and local news. Today, if you watch news programs such as CNN’s Headline news, you might get 3 or 4 minutes of hard news, and then 25 minutes of human interest stories filling out the rest of a segment.

It is becoming increasingly difficult for us to interpret news from marketing, fact from advertising and public relations, or gaining access to raw news.

Chaos Theory and Media

Chaos Theory states that any system is vulnerable to changing conditions either within or encroaching on the system. If the current or historical media systems are an example, we can see innovation or technologies (such as the Gutenberg press, Internet, paper, radio) as a significant disruptor to the media “system.”

The Internet is currently a very disruptive element to traditional media, as it provides a platform for applications such as YouTube, Twitter, instant messaging, and other utilities to provide either real-time, or near real-time one-to-one, one-to-many, or many-to-many communications. On a global scale.

The other disruptor is the fact young people have internet-enabled technologies fully diffused into their education and life, allowing the new “Generation Z” visibility into new communication concepts that prior generations may not yet comprehend, or may never comprehend. What will come out of this diffusion of knowledge into Gen Z-ers? Impossible to know, but it will no doubt potentially be as huge an event as the Gutenberg press was to the world of the 1400s.

A generation where the people are the news, create the news, consume the news, and provide the news. There will be casualties as we re-organize media outlets which no longer adequately support the 21^st century, but the result will be really, really exciting.

Gen-Z youth are not mentally restrained by the technical limitations and legacy of existing broadcast and print media. With their diffused knowledge and operation of existing and emerging technologies, they have a “clean slate” to develop new models of media, news, social interaction, and global presence. As “baby boomers,” we need to continue creating the tools our fledgling Generation Z needs to envision ways to exploit our technology, and further build our global presence and instant access to that news and information they need to live in a wired world.

John Savageau, Long Beach

“Did you know that if a butterfly flaps its wings in Tokyo, you’ll hear a boring description of chaos theory in NY?”

- @colsonwhitehead -> 11/19/09

New cartoon by Trussell & Trussell on AOL’s Politics Daily. With Lou Dobbs Gone, CNN Finds the Middle.

What if our smallest actions do matter? What if the frown we gave the clerk at Walgreen’s was the last straw of a bad day? What if we’d smiled instead? There’s a theory out there called the Butterfly Effect. It’s about a small change in an unstable system, like the weather, and how a small change can affect a big outcome. There’s a whole lot around it, the chaos theory and other things, but aren’t we, the human race, an unstable system? Hate and love lie equally in us. What if all our tiny violences, the frown, the cruel thought, the curse at someone whose driving upsets us, matter? What if our least thought is important? That would mean a responsibility almost too big to comprehend. We so small and yet our place in the scheme of things so much more than we realize…..

(This was motivated by watching the role of a wasp in a PBS Masterpiece Contemporary piece called Collision.)

A Winkling Wuggley walking by

gave a shiffling, smuffling sigh.

When I inquired as to why;

he shiffled and then merely said,

“Today I should’ve stayed in bed.”

“But it’s a most beglairigan day,

why would you want to hide away?”

“This morning started out just fine,

‘til my sollstippers slipped in the surpen’s tine.

And, as if that isn’t enough,

the neighborhood Crunkers began their miss chuff;

gavelloping me and my property,

and gerwayling my new bents geewee.

Then I sprung a leak in my grizzly grumptures,

from, what are commonly termed as, punctures.

Next, I had to replace the gonns,

but I couldn’t remember if it was three or one.

And when I arrived at Alfawaire’s,

he told me gonns came only in pairs.

Are these reasons enough to answer your question?”

“Oh, yes,” I replied, with a sympathetic expression.

“Then, my good sir, let us part, say goodbye.”

And as we parted, he winked his eye,

and gave a shiffling, smuffling sigh.

New cartoon by Trussell & Trussell on AOL’s Politics Daily. Lou Dobbs, We’ll Miss You.

Nature obviously subscribes to chaos theory, not one of these trees was growing straight or keeping to its own space. Incidentally heres a good article on chaos theory using Jurassic Park to help explain it!

HEH HEH

Your move Hans Christian Anderson of Star Wars.  Please do not bring any wookies or fly your Kite at the break of dawn.  Solo….care for a polo mint?

I had stayed too long out of body when trying to help Donnie, one of my charges, and had ended up feeling as awful as when I had had the flu last winter. And like the flu, it took several days before I felt normal again. Several days of moving slowly, getting plenty of rest, and absolutely no planing.

Now it was Thursday and I had to do my second appearance at the radio station. Although more aware of how things worked there, having already done one show, I was still dreading this appearance. My body felt normal, but my energies still seemed a bit off, so I really had no idea if I’d be able to do any readings or not.

As the train pulled into the Chicago station, Dave and I prepared to disembark. I gave him a smile feigning a joi de vivre I didn’t feel. Sensing my discomfort, Dave said, “Do you want me to come with you? I don’t have any meetings until the afternoon.”

I did; I really did, but I knew I was being selfish and childish. On top of that, once the show started, there wasn’t anything he could do. He wouldn’t be allowed in the studio with me and AJ, the disc jockey; he’d just have to sit around waiting in the break room or lobby, and that was just silly. So, I hugged him and shook my head against his shoulder.

We stood like that for some moments on the train platform, people struggling to get around us, and some being downright rude about it. Finally, I pushed back from Dave, but without completely breaking the embrace, and said, “You better get going, Sir, or my husband will begin to suspect that we’re up to something.”

I gave him my flirtiest smile, and with a rueful grin he gave me a quick kiss; then we went our separate ways.

I wasn’t quite as early this time when I arrived at the radio station. This time, the receptionist was already ensconced at her desk, her phone ringing, and several people vying for her attention when I stepped inside the lobby.

I was headed her way when the producer for AJ’s show intercepted me. I felt a brief tingling on my energies, as depleted as they were, and my arms were suddenly covered with goose pimples as we passed close by the receptionist’s desk, but before I could really register this phenomenon, we were strolling toward the coffee room and the producer was telling me the plans for the show.

Most of the producer’s chatter faded into the hubbub of the station’s general noise, and my mind wandered back to the strange tingling of my energies and what (or who) might have caused it. This was the second time that something like this had happened here, and I was beginning to suspect that perhaps someone at the radio station was the sender of the email that I had tried to locate, or the creator of the nightmares…or maybe even both? Hmmm, that was a possibility I hadn’t considered before, but now, it seemed more than just possible.

As that thought flitted through my head, the producer’s voice broke through to me, “So, are you okay with all of that?”

Having no idea what all I was supposed to be okay with, I simply nodded in his direction. My mind was still trying to chase down the idea that someone here at the radio station was the one who had been dragging me into their nightmares.

A moment later, the producer and I entered AJ’s studio, and soon afterward the show started. Just like last time, AJ fed me the question in a yes/no format, but unlike the last time, I managed to answer them without fumbling. I even managed to add some insights and advice to at least half the answers. So, all-in-all it was a much smoother and easier time than my last appearance on his show. The last call came and went, and the whole show completed without any surprises.

As AJ’s theme song played, the station manager appeared in the door and signalled that he wanted me to folllow him to his office. Reluctantly, I nodded and followed him through the maze of offices and studios. I really wanted to get out to the lobby and see if I could sense anything. I was really hoping that my guess was right, and that the nightmare creator or emailer (or both) was someone here at the radio station. If I could find them, then just maybe I could clear up some of these issues that were interferring with my own life.

However, I curbed my impatience and followed the station manager to his office. He offered coffee, which I declined, and then he got to the point of this meeting. Evidently, the listeners liked me, or so he said.

“They find you sympathetic; someone they can relate to,” he said.

I was floored. I had been sure I sounded more like a fool or an idiot with all of my erms and ums, but he said the numbers didn’t lie (although who had ever really talked with the numbers to be sure?).

“I’ve spoken with the owners and we agree; we’d like you to do the show with AJ at least once a month,” the station manager continued. “So, what do you think?”

His round, pink face was awash with smiles, as if he were offering me the most fabulous prize in the world—and, come to think of it, he sort of was. For several hours of work a month they were offering an obscene amount of money; money that Dave and I could really use.

I was too surprised to think straight, though. I really needed Dave’s calm reassurance and insights. (Don’t let anyone kid you, for all that I might be able to see the “future”, I have no idea what is going to happen in my own life, and I rarely have the type of knowledge or insights that can help me make decisions like the one I was being presented with.)

Flustered and thinking that the whole offer was some sort of cruel hoax, I finally managed to mutter something about needing to speak to Dave about it.

“Please let us know by tomorrow noon if you will be accepting our offer,” the station manager said as he handed me a copy of the contract.

I nodded dumbly, and in a haze of disbelief I left the radio station. My desire to stay and discover if someone there was responsible for the nightmares was completely forgotten in my rush to see Dave and share the news.

Jurassic Park was my favorite movie growing up. The idea of bringing an extinct species back to life millions of years later was fascinating to me, absolutely phenomenal. As I grew older and continued to watch the movie every now and again, I started to become more familiar with the themes that are so profoundly disputed throughout. The most pressing I believe, is that of Chaos Theory. There are hundreds of interpretations of chaos theory by numerous mathematicians and physicists, but my favorite of these will always be what was stated by the character of Dr. Malcolm in Jurassic Park.

In the movie, Dr. Ian Malcolm (Jeff Goldblum) concludes that the park is destined to fail because of the mere fact that “life cannot be contained”. He then goes on to describe what he calls Chaos Theory, which is more eminently interpreted in the book. Chaos Theory to Dr. Malcolm is the formula for predicting the consequences of an event or series of events. I say consequence because of the fact that the park turned out to be disastrous in the end.

When applied to everyday life I believe Chaos Theory exists in a larger scale. What we think we can control and have a handle on we cannot. We can make educated guesses to make ourselves feel more at ease, but in actuality we do not really know anything.

The best way for this to be described goes along with the Malcolm Effect. I found a fictional livejournal dedicated to Dr. Malcolm that really hits this whole Chaos Theory on the head.

“A theory discovered/published by Ian stating that no system moves toward equilibrium. All systems are inherently moving toward collapse. The more variables involved the more catastrophic the collapse.”

How perfectly described. Chaos may not seem like a form of art, but it most definitely is. Throughout the book they show specific formulas of Chaos Theory becoming more complex in its nature, although they are just representations since Chaos is not a tangible object it still shows us the complexity of the theory. Sometimes I wonder about how the world works, but when you think about it, we never can be too sure.

What are your thoughts?

New cartoon by Trussell & Trussell on AOL’s Politics Daily. Off to See the Job Fairy.

Sept 14, 2009 6 minutes to midnight.

8:15am…Drop off my son at first day of Kindergarten…with Mama and the baby along for the ride of course…get to work early, park on sidewalk in front of the shop (because I can), stroller out, baby out, girls off for a run, keys, door, alarm, office light, list ready…bank, post, Garibaldi Graphics…STOP!  Did I hear that?  What was that?  Did the reno workers in the suite upstairs drop something through one of the four new holes they’ve drilled in my open concept ceiling?  Or is it….no…yes, it is, “Drip!” the one thing that can put an end to any perfectly planned and functioning day, water.

Move everything, bucket too big for the corner, use the cut off pop bottle we use for filling the mop pale because it fits in the sink, wipe, move, there it is, “Drip, plop!”  Call the neighbors upstairs, call the strata manager, call the emergency number and suddenly 8:30 something has faded to 10:00am and nothing is done, time to open the shop. 

Meanwhile, moving piles of boxes away from the drip and counting cash bring reality back to the forefront.  10:00 something, still not open, run boxes upstairs to storage, no time to chat with strata guy whose daughter started kindergarten today too, meet the girls back from their run, trade keys, doors open, DVD, music, lights (already on), TV, open for business.

The drips stop and in the ensuing chaos my office has shifted fully to one side of the room, the side with my desk of course, and the “OCD” of unmentioned childhood instinctively turns on the nesting gene (either that or the excess estrogen father’s generate when a baby is born…it’s true) that leads to sorting, tossing recycling and/or re-use-it centering every item on my IKEA Expedit shelving unit of timeless design. 

 I pile old Skate, Surf and Snow Magazines on the Pique Newspaper rack outside in a new enviro concept – ‘Free-use-it’, buyer’s guides, notes, paper, more paper and some other paper I should never have printed to recycle, a broken bike tool to trash, a bag of old banners, doubles of other tools I have never used, old phones and calculators to Re-use-it, and finally, when the smoke clears…mop the floor and I’m ready to get to work.  (This took most of the day by the way…not too many customers on mid shoulder season chilly rain, cloud, sun days.)  And then I found it; the October 2007 Masters of Design Issue of Fast Company Magazine I bought at YVR on my first independent business flight and think to myself, By Design…this all happened by design.

The statement, “by Design” has a god-like sense of perfection.  “By Design”…like it has always been or better yet like it was meant to be.

Rewind to the 70’s.  I remember as a kid coloring with a pencil, light, dark, shadowy shades of grey that created the impossible imaginationscape of a child.  The pencil, by design, was the infinite; it was simplicity and complete purity.  It still is.  Like Ansel Adams seeking perfection in black and white in his darkroom (if you haven’t seen his autobiography find it), I knew at 4 or 5 or maybe 6 that I had vision…that the picture I was drawing had the potential of purpose and intent, that the picture was there to tell ‘you’ how ‘I’ see, how I feel.  Emotion; there is something so simple and yet seemingly so impossible to capture.  Adams said anyone can take a picture.  10% is being in the right place at the right time but the other 90% was developing the image to help people see what he saw.  By design there is so much more to art and design than we see firsthand after the creation is complete. 

I bought the magazine amidst one of the most physically creative times.  After the better part 17 years working the seam for fortune 500 retailers I was about to demolish the core of a 14 year old photo shop, built by a guy who laid the tiles on the floor by hand himself, and literally build my first business from the ground up (or ceiling down as the case turned out).   With the mastery of seasoned builders (my sister and my brother in law) in a week, just 7 days, by design, my design was there.  (Yes, 7 days…sound familiar? Ha, ha!)

By design the hand of god graces the Sistene Chapel and now 500 more years of history meet to bridge heaven and sky at the point where their fingers touch.  Someone said, “Surfing big waves is too thrilling to be an egocentric thing.”  It is so true…the same can be said for design because in the moment, in the rapture of the creation, in bringing the vision to life simply nothing else exists.  Not time or tide, nor any other conscious thought, pride or motivation, or even being for that matter…there you are alone and complete. 

Less is more…so much more.  When we let the experience create the invisible, the impossible, the rest will follow by design.

I was in an out of body state and hanging around Donnie’s apartment (Donnie is one of my charges). I had to make sure that he was safe. You see I wasn’t the only one hanging around. Death was also here, and that was the issue.

Before Lawrence, Donnie’s companion, had gotten home and called an ambulance, Donnie had tried to commit suicide. That had triggered our mutual connection, mine and Donnie’s, which was why I was there. But that didn’t explain how Death had known about Donnie; and it especially didn’t explain how he had known before I had.

Death’s usual notification process was usually a little more direct. Most times someone either jumped from their physical body to avoid the pain and while wandering the transitional plane would run into Death; or they would remain in their body but call for Death to take them so they could avoid any more pain. But this was different—strange different—and different with Death made me very nervous.

After all, Donnie had been unconscious, he hadn’t called out to anyone, and he wasn’t out of body (I checked first thing, because the last thing I wanted was one of my charges wandering around lost). Therefore, there was no way that Donnie contacted Death; so how did Death know to be here?

I was exhausted—physically and spiritually—and I just couldn’t wrap my mind around this puzzle. I really wanted to go home and let my body get some real sleep, something I hadn’t been able to do for several nights now.

I could feel the remains of my energy flagging, and I forced myself to remain where I was. The pull from my physical body was getting stronger, indicating that I really need to plane back; however, I couldn’t do that; at least not until Death left and I was sure Donnie was safe.

The EMTs wheeled Donnie, who seemed to be breathing without assistance now, to the ambulance. I hung back as Lawrence followed. I was waiting to see what Death was going to do.

At the sound of the front door closing, Death turned to me, his smile still just as smug as before, and he touched two fingers to his forehead and disappeared.

Not knowing whether he was giving up or tagging along hoping to grab Donnie either on the way to the hospital or once at the hospital, I had no choice but to follow Donnie. So, using the last bit of energy I had, I forced myself to follow the link I shared with Donnie.

I ended up in the back of the ambulance, and it was everything I could do to keep a presence there. Although, I didn’t see Death, I still wasn’t completely reassured that he wasn’t at the hospital waiting, so I clung to the link between myself and Donnie using that to keep me anchored with him.

The EMTs rushed Donnie into the emergency room, and I hovered in the background as they got him stabilized. The first hints of daylight were creeping over the horizon outside as the hospital staff moved Donnie to a room.

I was becoming a shadow of myself, literally. I was barely able to continue my hold on this out of body existence. My body needed me and the pull to return was tearing at me. I had to leave. I hadn’t seen Death since leaving Donnie’s apartment, so I was hoping he was back on the transitional plane where he belonged.

Lawrence was sitting next to Donnie’s bed, stroking Donnie’s hand, when I finally let go of the link between us. I let the connection to my own body pull me down and I fell into myself with a horrible, gut-clenching feeling. I sat up with a start, completely disoriented. I had expected to be in my bed, in my bedroom, with Dave by my side. Instead, I was in the den on the couch, and it took me several moments to remember why.

I swung my legs over the side of the couch, and bit back a cry of pain. I felt as if I had run a marathon, and my head was pounding—I think it was beating in time to one of Gloria Estafan’s songs. I really wanted to just go back to bed and curl up under the covers for a month. I pushed myself to my feet, and wished I hadn’t.

The room whirled around me and I thought I was going to topple over. I dropped back onto the couch and put my head between my knees. When the world steadied, I stood up again, but this time much more slowly.

I toddled to the kitchen in an old lady style shuffle, and sort of clung to the door jamb while I looked around. The coffee had been brewed and a half a pot still sat on the warmer. There was also a note next to the coffee machine, so I continued into the room and picked it up. It was from Dave, and it just said that he hadn’t wanted to wake me, and he’d see me tonight.

I looked at the coffee, but opted for a large glass of water and several ibuprofen instead. Then I climbed the stairs (trying not to moan with each step), and went to our bedroom. There, I crawled between the covers and was instantly asleep.

I woke to the jangling of the phone, but by the time I realized what the noise was, it had (thankfully) stopped. I glanced at the clock on the bureau and saw that I hadn’t slept all that long. Although my body felt like it needed about 10 more hours of sleep, my mind was already chasing itself. Knowing that I wouldn’t get back to sleep again, I disentangled myself from the bed covers and stumbled into the bathroom.

I wanted to soak under a super hot shower for as long as I could stand it. Maybe that would help me overcome the groggy, muscle-cramped feeling that I currently had. As I started the shower up, I realized that I hadn’t felt this awful since I’d had the flu last winter.

ITS been almost ONE year since the first PRIDE Dance Competition presented by Kappa Phi Lambda Sorority, INC and Pi Delta Psi Fraternity, INC. at Rutgers University New Brunswick campus. Excitement for the event has been building since they first announced the event slated for OCTOBER. As well as everyone in the NJ/NYC scene has known since the first announcement, the early target date initially threw most of the dance teams a surprise by how early it was revealed. As a result, most teams were not ready at all to compete leaving only an initial showcase/competition total of only five teams on the October date. Unfortunately (due to some other difficulties), the show was rescheduled to a later (and much more recognizable) date of November — when they actually first unveiled Pride. This SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 22nd, PRIDE 2 hits the NJ dance scene bringing back big name competitors such as, E.P.I.C. Motion, SERCis Company, Rutgers Dance Team (RDT), Team Technique, and last year’s champions –Project D Dance Company.

In addition to the established teams, there is new talent on the horizon for this years Pride 2, featuring new to the NJ/NYC scene groups such as: Miracle Project, Outta Kontrol, YFAMD (MD), and Phunktions (UMD).

Despite the atmosphere of competition, its really great to see an explosion of new teams coming out of the wood work. Whether or not there is hype around them, or if a team is good or not shouldn’t be the issue.

The realization should be…DIVERSIFICATION.

It means new ideas and self expression is taking place. It also means that truly our dance community is growing. Give it time and something exceptionally original and unmistakably beautiful to public appeal is bound come from our budding dance community.

CLICK to go the the event page.

While walking in the dovey dark

I heard the song of the wooden ark.

Then gazing up at the pecan pie

I saw some lisping crowds go by.

The blowing of the knobby knees

started swaying the cheddar cheese;

and as the perfect pun slipped west

I headed for my comb to rest.

Is it really coming? Is the end near? What happens after doomsday?

John Cusack stars as Jackson Curtis, a struggling sci-fi author who moonlights as a Russian mobster’s limo driver. He is divorced and wants to win back his kids love. So he takes his kids on a camping trip to re-ignite that long lost spark.

Meanwhile a scientist in India discovers that the Earth’s core is heating up thanks to the sun irradiating too many neutrinos (or some shit). A friend (Chiwetal Ejiofor) of his who works for the US government freaks out and flies back to washington to alert the President (Danny Glover).

Meanwhile back with Jackson he takes his kids to Yellowstone Park where he meets Yogi Bear and they look for picnic baskets, oh sorry, I mean he meets a creepy guy (Woody Harrelson) who lives in a Winnebago from the 70s and broadcasts a chaos theory radio show out of it.

The creepy guy tells him “the end is near” and Yellowstone is going to become one giant volcano. Of course he doesnt believe him until his wife calls screaming that she was just involved in an earthquake that split the family supermarket in two. Of course creepy guy and Indian scientist guy are right and we are off to the races dodging meteors, flaming cars, cracks that seem to only follow the actors and crumbling airstrips.

First of all, check your brain at the door. Strap on a parachute and hang on because folks, it’s going to be a bumpy ride!

2012 is just that a very, very bumpy ride.

You have so many storylines slamming into your face in the first 30 minutes two of the dumber ones could have been turfed without any complications. The lounge singers, who cares if George Segal is stuck in a Poseidon Adventure rip off? The rich art guy (Patrick Bauchau, yeah I know the guys name) who died in the same tunnel as Princess Diana was that story really necessary at all? These storylines were DOA when they appeared.

The main storyline involving Cusack, his kids, his ex (Amanda Peet) and her new boyfriend doctor/pilot is where the story moves along the best. At best the rest of the people were cannon fodder.

This movie reminded me of those amusement park rides where the fake tour guide tries to tell you the legend of the one-eyed caveman or the toothless hippo but really all you are there for is to get shook and go down a sudden drop in the dark as a grotesque dummy jumps at you.

God I love those. I went on one in Japan at there version of Disneyland called Disney Sea where Indiana Jones was our tour guide and I was in stitches the whole time because here is a perfect replica of Harrison Ford screaming at me in perfect Japanese. Anyway back to the review.

Take that ride, the crazy story is the tour guide and the utterly astounding special effects are the sudden drops and the grotesque dummy.

I really can’t say any actor was any better than any other actor in this because they were all just amusement park robots under the leadership of the master of disaster himself Roland Emmerich (Independence Day, Day After Tomorrow).

Emmerich has really out done himself on the production design, effects and well making this roller coaster work. Just too bad it clocks in at over 2.5 hours. Cause that’s a lot of time to focus on a very weak script. The script is so weak I might even compare it Emmerich’s Godzilla attempt.

I loved the thrills, the effects, Cusack’s look of bewilderment, Thandie Newton’s eyes and well to turn my brain off for 2 hours. This film will please the Transformers movie generation and it is just a good time to behold even if it is like an ice cream sandwich without the ice cream.

3.5 out of 5

So Says the Soothsayer

I’ve been enjoying Chaos, by James Gleick. The 1987 book looks at chaos theory from different angles: the mathematician’s, the scientist’s, the biologist’s, the meterologist’s, the artist’s… and combines them in a survey of the theory as it has grown in the past decades. I love that some of the most important contributions came from people  influenced by past scientists who had long ago lost their pull with the scientific community–where Newton’s theories had won out on color, Goethe’s where dismissed as “pseudoscientific meandering.” It took just that type of pseodoscientific meandering to take science to the fuzzy edges where established natural laws stop answering the questions. “Where Newton was a reductionist, Goethe was holistic.” That holistic mindset is at the center of many of chaos theory’s discoveries. There’s more to it than Jeff Goldblume in Jurassic Park, I promise. There’s also fractals. jk.

From Chaos, by James Gleick:

“New geometries always begin when someone changes a fundamental rule. Suppose space can  be curved instead of flat, a geometer says, and the result is a weird curved parody of Euclid that provides precisely the right framework  for the general theory of relativity. Suppose space can have four dimensions, or five, or six. Suppose the number expressing dimension can be a fraction. Suppose shapes can be twisted, stretched, knotted. Or, now, suppose shapes are defined, not by solving an equation once, but by iterating it in a feedback loop.

“Julia, Fatou, Hubbard, Barsley, Mandlebrot–these mathematicians changed the rules about how to make geometrical shapes. The Euclidean and Cartesian methods of turning equations into curves are familiar to anyone who has studied high school geometry or found a point on a map using two coordinates. Standard geometry takes an equation and asks for the set of numbers that satisfy it. The solutions to an equation like x²+y²=1, then, form a shape, in this case a circle. Other simple equations produce other pictures, the ellipses, parabolas, and hyperbolas of conic sections or even the more complicated shapes produced by differential equations in phase space. But when a geometer iterates an equation instead of solving it, the equation becomes a process instead of a description, dynamic instead of static. When a number goes into the equation, a new number comes out; the new number goes in, and so on, points hopping from place to place. … “

That was just a mathematical spot in the book, but the awesome thing is that Gleick captures the theory from different angles, and speaks to the outsider in the same facile manner Carl Sagan chats about apple pie and the universe.

New cartoon by Trussell & Trussell on AOL’s Politics Daily: Everybody! Let’s Play Health Care!

Despite my trepidations, I had gone to ask Death for information regarding the person whose nightmares I kept getting dragged into. I had expected him to ask me for some of my life—a week, a month, a year—but he had surprised me by saying that he didn’t want any time from me. But now I dreaded to hear what it was he did want.

“Give me the names of the next 10 people you are to escort to the transitional plane,” Death said as he reached out and flicked a finger across the cords that tethered me to the people I was assigned to help within the next few months.

An icy jolt flowed through me, and I backed up a couple of steps. Faces flew across my mind: Ruthie, whose dementia was so bad that she wouldn’t know whether she was speaking with Death or her long-dead husband; Richard, whose heart was so weak now that he could no longer do much of anything for himself but who loved his wife and grandkids so much that he continually overextended himself; Debra, whose lung cancer had spread but who refused to give up hope that a cure might be found; or Donnie, who had just found out he had AIDs and was convinced it would be a horrible death so was contemplating suicide.

I stared at Death as if he were nuts. If I told him about Ruthie, Richard, Donnie and all, he would try to manipulate them into giving up their remaining time. But it would be a lie. He wouldn’t tell them the truth. He would never explain to them that if they left early to avoid the pain—real or imagined, physical or emotional—that they would end up having to face it in another life.

Everything was about experiences and lessons, choices and balance. You could make any choice you wanted, but if your choice created an imbalance (with yourself or someone else) then you had to put things right, you had make choices that would recreate balance. It’s just how it worked.

If you decide to experience the angst of unrequited love, but Death comes along and convinces you that he can help you overcome that pain and you go with him, you’ll just have to live that life at a different time; experience that unrequited love another time.

If you pick a life where you’re dying of cancer, but you decide to end your life early because you can’t stand the pain, then guess what? In the next life or the one after you will have to face a similar death scenario, and if you opt out early again, then you’ll just keep repeating things until you stop doing that. Eventually, you’ll have to experience the whole thing—the pain, suffering, and the eventual enlightenment that comes from them. Ain’t that a kick in the head?

Choosing Death is basically choosing suicide, and while suicide is a valid experience, if it isn’t the experience the soul wanted, then it leaves you out of balance with yourself.

I knew Death wouldn’t bother to explain all of this to my charges, and I couldn’t—it’s one of those things that each person learns at their own pace in their own way—I did the only thing I could, I shook my head and turned toward the door.

My hand was on the doorknob when he gently took my shoulder and turned me around.

“What I do is not hateful, you know. I save them from suffering, is that so bad?” His expression actually looked caring and concerned.

I jerked away from him, and gave him a scathing look. I opened the door as I replied, “It is when you lie to them. When you don’t tell them what they’re really getting from you.”

I then stepped back out into the gray nothingness of the transitional plane.

I was just getting ready to plane back home, when I felt a tug on a cord from one of my “clients”. Although I knew I would be exhausted in the morning, I followed the cord’s pull.

I walked through the building’s wall into a very modern, very comfortable living room. I knew this room, I thought, it was Donnie’s living room.

I heard (sensed) a noise from one of the other rooms, and I headed toward it. When I got there, I stopped in shocked surprise. Donnie lay sprawled across the gorgeous muted brown and purple cover on a rather large mahogany bed, and Death sat on the edge of the bed near one of Donnie’s outstretched hands an empty pill bottle in his own hand.

Overcoming my surprise, I asked angrily, “What are you doing here?”

Death set the pill bottle on its side on the bedside table, before answering me. “I came to see if Donnie here wanted my help.” He stood and fixed the crease in his pants before continuing, “Isn’t that why you came?”

Donnie spasmed and it looked as if he were having problems breathing. It was then that I saw that he had vomit down his front

“He’s having respiratory difficulties,” I said to no one in particular.

“I believe he is, yes,” Death responded while leaning over and studying the now still Donnie. He reached out as if to touch him, and I leapt forward grabbing Death’s hand.

“Leave him alone,” I looked down at the hand I held and noted the beautifully manicured nails, and smoothness of this skin. There were no lines on Death’s hands, because Death had never lived—not in the physical sense, anyway.

A door slammed and a voice echoed through the apartment, “Hey, Donnie. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to get mad.”

Footsteps came down the hall toward us. “Donnie, are you there?”

A face appeared in the doorway, “Oh my god, Donnie!”

Lawrence, Donnie’s housemate and current live-in rushed over and tried to rouse Donnie. Seeing the empty pill bottle and unable to rouse his friend, he quickly reached for the phone and dialed for help. He told the 911 operator what he needed, and then set the receiver down without hanging up. He then tried to give Donnie CPR as he waited for the emergency team to arrive.

I stood back, a smile on my lips, but Death was also smiling. “It’s not over yet,” he said smugly.

I wasn’t sure what Death was up to, and because I couldn’t trust him I decided to hang around. I could have left. I knew Donnie would be okay now—I had felt the tingling in the connection between me and Donnie fade away, and that usually meant that there was no longer a need for my services. But with Death still hanging around, I wasn’t all that sure that Donnie was safe—he was okay, but not safe.

I backed away into the hallway, as did Death, when the emergency response team arrived. As we stood and watched through the doorway, it suddenly occurred to me that Death had been here before me.

I stopped watching the EMTs and stared at Death’s profile and wondered: How had he known? It wasn’t as if Donnie had come to the transitional plane. In fact, Donnie hadn’t left his body at all. So, how had Death known that Donnie had been close to ending his life? How did he know before me, when we were both on the transitional plane and I had the direct link?

Something was wrong with this situation, I thought, and a shiver ran down my spine.

Asylum on Saturday November 14th, our eagerly awaited big metal night, will be one of the best productions of fierce, furious and filthy music the Live Lounge has ever hosted. One of the bands due to appear on the night, Nailed To The Furnace, has had to pull out. The remaining five bands, Bulletproof, Chaos Theory, Nocturnum, We Bury Our Own, and Brutus Stonefist from Guernsey, are joined by special guest DJ Danny Parkes. Doors open at nine o’clock.

Brutus Stonefist

Brutus Stonefist have two songs up on MySpace. Five Pounds Of Flesh and Redgrave are deathcore tours de force with feral riffing and swarming, scabrous atmosphere. Have a listen and pay your respects to the Channel Islands’ kings of fear at Brutus Stonefist MySpace

Fantastic work from the desktop of pop artist extraordinaire, Mark Evans

JMCT, Music Scene and Asylum have joined forces to present Brobots! with Lee Downie and The Mulburys at Live Lounge on Saturday November 21st.

Brobots! were the subject of a recent profile in Gallery. With forthcoming appearances for Club Kamikaze at Live Lounge on November 13th and Hadouken at Liquid on November 28th, they are the 100% synthetic boy band that all of Jersey has come to love. Lee Downie aka Jackson Lee, beat box champion, last played for Asylum at the Oxjam Jersey event in July and impressed the audience there with a unique mix of hip hop and acoustic guitar playing. The Mulburys recorded a set of songs with producer Sam Falle this summer. Their sophisticated, punchy power pop is laden with lush grooves and irresistible hooks.

James Evans explains the inspiration for this show, “Instead of donating the money to charity as we have for the last twenty JMCT gigs we will be using any money we make this time to put an Asylum CD out next year and hope to start raising cash to put bands in the studio to record.”

WTF!!! What the holy hell is this thing, i think its going to destroy the world, save your children and keep the hell away from me