No webcam required to see and hear people. Free unlimited messages, high quality video and audio rooms, videochat 1-on-1 with someone. Live streaming audio and video with our live webcam.

http://www.icutoo.com

I am interested in hearing from you about your experiences with cyberbullying, inappropriate behavior in social networkings sites, text messages, and so on. I also would like your tips or solutions to the issues. Please feel free to share this. The information will be used to post on a Online Safety website which I will be happy to share with you. Thank you.

No webcam required to see and hear people. Free unlimited messages, high quality video and audio rooms, videochat 1-on-1 with someone. Live streaming audio and video with our live webcam.

http://www.icutoo.com

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Fancamtastic is seeing a lot of new members joining us from all over the chat world.  From Jmeeting, Anywebcam, Meetcam and many others, our membership is growing rapidly as the word spreads among members of other sites about how nice fancam is.  With the demise of many small cam chat sites, we’ve managed to hang in there and grow during these tough economic times.  We wouldn’t be where we are today without dedicated, enthusiastic members spreading the word.  Check us out today and see why we continue to grow as other sites lose members every day.  While we are still small compared to the big boys, we feel like we can offer so much more.  With free chat rooms, our very own Radio Bijoux playing tunes 24/7 with live DJ’s from around the world, the best CD-Quality voice chat and fastest webcams, the ability to open up to 25 cams (depending upon membership level) and much more, there is something for everyone here.  Membership to fancamtastic is 100% Free.  We DO offer premium memberships for those of you wishing to participate in all of the features we offer.  From Silver right on up to our BEST, the Top Dawg membership plan, we have something for everyone.  Even if you never choose to purchase a membership you can still enjoy a lot of features and use our cam chat.  With Private rooms, locked rooms, file transfers, drawing, picture uploads and much more, our premium members love the chat rooms.  You can add friends, block cams and voice, and pretty much moderate a room yourself.  The only requirement we have for membership is that you must be 18 years old or older as this is an adult chat site and there will be nudity and sexually explicit photos, videos and cam chatters on the site.  We even offer a way to block these if a member so chooses.  You see, we want it to be FUN and FRIENDLY for EVERYONE.  We are a community of friends and we want YOU to be a part of it!  So join today.  It’s FREE, QUICK, and you’ll be chatting in one of our chat rooms in no time!  www.fancamtastic.com

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I met my ex in 2001 on the internet.  I didn’t know it at the time, but she was married with a kid and living with her husband.  When I met her on a singles chat room on MSN (now, sadly, defunct).  We met and flirted like high school kids.  It was fun.  For the first week or so, I’d log in and look for her.  Then we added each other to as friends and started a long distance relationship.  She seemed genuine, real, down to earth.  I’d recently ended a three year relationship.  That previous relationship just sort of fizzed out.  No arguments or huge disagreements, just didn’t feel in love with each other.  There was no passion.  It felt like two room mates and we just kept going.  Eventually, she told me she was moving out and we parted ways.  No fireworks, nothing to write about really…  So now nearly a year after that breakup, on MSN, I met this great woman or so I thought.

At the time I had a great career and far too much money for a single guy.  I was a well paid consultant for a big, well known company.  I won’t mention the name here.  She lived a good six hours away from me, but I really didn’t care.  We spoke several times every day.  Sometimes on chat or IM, others over the phone or even video conference.  It really made us feel close, even though we were miles away.  I invited her to rendezvous with me in Vegas, and she accepted.  We were both pretty excited that we’ll finally get to meet f2f.

As we counted down the days to the Vegas trip, it started feeling more and more real and I was getting a bit nervous.  I realized I knew very little about her, and really wanted more before we met.  The questions started flying, then just a few days before our trip, it hit me.  She was a very white mix of nationalities, Irish, English, even Basque.  But her last name just didn’t match her face.  Her name was very Mexican.  So I pushed, and she avoided the question.  Where did her last name come from?  Finally, she relented.  She was married.  Not even separated, mind you.  Married with a young son, still living with her husband.

She did say that there was no love in her marriage and really had never been.  “We haven’t slept in the same bed for year!”  She explained.  “We’ve only had sex three times during our marriage.”  I asked how long they’d been married and much to my surprise she told me, “ten years.”  Her story struck a note with me, given my last relationship.  She told me that she’d broken up with the love of her life shortly before meeting her now husband.  She believed that she’d never find love again, and poof this harmless nice guy appeared and persisted.  She dated him, and it felt easy… as she put it, “safe.”  So when he proposed she agreed.  But it wasn’t the life she wanted for herself.  No passion, no spark, just working paying the bills, caring for their son.  All of that should have set off bells and whistles, but for some reason it didn’t.  Maybe love really was blind.

We did go to Vegas, hugged, kissed and checked into a hotel.  It wasn’t even a half hour and we were naked in bed together.  The sex was great for both of us.  She hadn’t had sex with her husband in about 5 years, and it’d been a year and a half since I’d broken up with my girlfriend.  Far too long and we were both ready.  We had a great weekend, both of us felt free and like two kids in love.

Eventually the weekend drew to a close.  That last night, I really started feeling guilty.  I wasn’t the one who was married, still I thought I really should encourage her to work things out with her husband.  If for nothing else, for her son.  I’d heard people say that an affair helped, not hurt, their marriage.  For some, an affair sparks a bunch of emotions.  I’m not sure if it’s the guilt or what, but it often gets people talking who hadn’t talked in years.  I told her to go back home and see if she could resolve things with her husband.  I didn’t want to be the guy who split up a marriage.  I thought I was being unselfish, and really caring for doing this.  I wanted to pursue a relationship with her, but put her family before my own needs.

She was pissed at me for even talking about this.  At that moment, she thought I’d just used her for a weekend of fun, and never really wanted a relationship with her.  That was pretty far from the truth, still it was how she saw it.  Reassuring her, I let her know I’m interested but really thought she needed to try and work things out, then end the marriage if she thought it was over.

She told her husband she wanted a divorce just a day or two after Vegas, she didn’t mention the affair.  He thought she’d gone to Vegas with a girl friend of hers, and she didn’t want him to know any differently.  Still, he was so hurt that he left immediately.  That night, after she put their son to bed, her husband packed a bag and left.  He didn’t say a word to his son, or even leave a note.  In the morning, her son asked about his dad and she just said, “he’s gone.”  She urged him to speak with the boy, but he was too hurt and unable to do it.  A rough situation all around.  Even though I think he needed to speak with his son, I can understand that he wasn’t in the kind of emotional shape to have that kind of talk with his son.

… More to come

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A seamy underworld is being discussed at the Mabee Center. Law enforcement and others are there for a conference on the trafficking of children for sex. Mark Elam, the director for Oklahomans Against Trafficking Humans says it is a growing problem in the United States. He says here, the kids are held through several means of control but usually not with shackles like you’ll find in other parts of the world. Elam says this is a tough problem for law enforcement because these girls are not out on street corners, they’re usually being set up with their clients through internet chat rooms or in special after hour places. It’s not just girls that are being abused. Elam says more and more boys are being trafficked for sex with most of them right around the age of puberty.

source: http://krmg.com/localnews/2009/10/child-sex-trafficking-conferen.html

I had recently done a chat room (for free, I might add) for a magazine I’ve written for over the past 12 years.  I’ve done chat rooms before on my site but you get an influx of people who don’t know why they are there, what questions to ask or even how to formulate a question that makes sense!  Through all this, the host is supposed to be a Goddess and know what the people mean.  Organize your questions, people.  Have a full thought and then convey it properly.

People asked me questions like, “How do I get rid of fears and doubts?”  I told him to go to a therapist!  How can a yes/no spread for tarot answer that question?  If he had a year ahead reading (I was doing a minute or two each), then we could deal with his issues through tarot, but if you can’t organize a full thought or an intelligent question, why are you in the chat room?

The best one was, “What can tarot do for me?”  So I went on to talk about how it gives one options and choices for the future.  It helps you see where you are procrastinating or perhaps where you are being a “sucker” (too giving, caring, loving, kind, generous and honest, etc.) and if you change the pattern, your life will be more positive.  So he asked again, “So how can it help me?”  Simply, I guess, I don’t know.  You are not my client and I have never done a reading for you, so I thought I answered as best that I could.  Was he not listening?

Chat rooms are a service for those who truly need some advice or guidance.  Even though my editor told me that there are no ridiculous questions, I beg to differ.  There are.  I’ve been teaching metaphysics and parapsychology for over 38 years around the world and on cruises and I know a ridiculous question when I hear one.  For example:  One man asked if he were going to get a job within the next six months?  Sounds like a well organized question, doesn’t it?  I inquired if he were sending out resumes, networking and asking friends for leads about a job while I was shuffling the cards for his answer.  He said, “No, I’m just waiting for a job to come to me.”  Surprise, surprise, the cards said, “No, he would not get a job within the next six months.”  He said, “I didn’t think so.”  Duh!  Get off your butt and do something positive towards acquiring a job – nothing comes to us for free or without effort.  I think we all know that.

At the beginning of the chat room, I tried to explain what we would do in the chat as well as give a few minutes of background.  However, people just jumped right in with their questions and I asked if they could wait about 20 minutes so they can understand what I was going to do — but being a rude group  who totally ignored my request — they just typed over me and over each other with their personal questions.  I gave up and answered their questions.  Then, what happened?  As people came into the room, they each asked if I could give some background on tarot!  Are you kidding me?  No one wanted to listen to it the first time and then they wanted it repeated three or more times.

Feedback on the magazine site about me said I was negative.  Negative?  I think the whole room was negative because no one knew what they were talking about.  Going to a therapist is not a negative response.  I tell some of my clients who need more than a tarot reading to straighten out their lives to go to a counselor or therapist and no one has ever objected to that advice and always said they were thinking of it anyway and was glad for the confirmation.  I guess I could have said, “Talk to friends and family and if that doesn’t work, perhaps you should see a therapist,” but you know what, I am very straight forward and give the advice they need at the moment and that boy/man needed therapy!

Everyone was interested in the most bizarre things including the “When will I get rich?” question.  I thought we all out grew that pattern long ago, although I know who asked me and I think she was goofing so the mood could lighten up.  I even told my fiance some of the questions that were being asked in the room; he is a very intelligent college educated man and he asked, “What are they talking about?  It doesn’t make sense.”  I know.  I know, but I wanted to just make sure it wasn’t me.

I now remember why I don’t do chat rooms any more.  They NEVER bring in new business – these people are just looking for FREEBIES and want you to give them the answers that they want to hear.  They want you to make choices for them and decide their futures and I won’t do that.  God gave us free will, so I give options for your future and fortunately or unfortunately you have to decide your own path in this life.  Then the same woman even said in a feedback note to the magazine that I said they weren’t smart enough or she asked if I weren’t smart enough – gee, I wonder which one it is?

The editor is trying to be fair and look at both sides, but you know, she wasn’t there and didn’t see what an unruly group of crazies that were in the room.  However, it did spur me into doing teleconference calls again starting in January on Feng Shui and maybe other topics.  At least I can tell them to formulate questions before they ask them.  Besides, most people can’t type 110 wpm like I can, so some were asking questions while I was answering another question.  Very confusing format and very confusing evening.  One that I hope will never be repeated.

Moral is never to do a free chat room on a day with the moon in Scorpio when your Ascendant and Pluto are in Leo!

I am now finished with this ridiculous waste of time in writing about chat rooms, but had to get this feeling of frustration out of me or I would not be able to sleep tonight and I must get up very early tomorrow.

Anyway, if you go into a chat room, here are some rules:

Find out what the chat room is about.  If you don’t know, wait around until you see what it is about and then ask questions at the appropriate time.

Find out when you are allowed to ask personal questions and wait for the host to call upon you.

Ask a question that makes sense.  Don’t give half thoughts or assume the host knows what you are talking about if you are typing in a cryptic secret code.

Be courteous.  The person doing the chat room is doing this on his/her own time for free and as a service FOR YOU so respect that.

Stop complaining about whether or not you liked the chat room.  If you got anything out of it FOR FREE, you are ahead of the game.

If you don’t like the chat room, just leave.  I’m sure you can find another chat room which can interest you.

Other than that, I think I am done ranting and raving about chat rooms – so remember my teleconferencing calls starting in January.  They will be easier and more fun, I promise.

www.vikkianderson.net

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Does your child, teen or do you venture into “Chat Rooms” online? Chat rooms are among the riskiest places on the Net for children and teens. Most Internet Predators are lingering waiting for their next victim in a variety of chat rooms. Don’t allow it to be your child.

As a Parent Advocate, I encourage all parents to take the steps to educate your children about cyber safety with a strong emphasis on chat room safety. October is National Cyber Safety Awareness Month, which is a reason for you to set aside time to sit with your kids and discuss what lurks online.

Here are some great Chat Room safety tips from Connect Safely to share with your family:

Remember that what you say in a chat room or instant messaging session is live — you can’t take it back or delete it later.

Don’t say anything you wouldn’t want the public to know — this includes your full name, your address, phone number of other personal information.

Don’t get together with someone you meet in a chat room. If you must, meet in a public place and bring along some friends.

Don’t reveal your actual location or when and where you plan to hang out.

Choose a nickname that’s not sexually suggestive and doesn’t give away your real name.

If someone says or does something creepy, block them and don’t respond.

Just sign out if the topic turns to sex. That can often lead somewhere you don’t want to go.

For more info: Connect Safely,iKeepSafe, ReputationDefender/MyChild, Google Bomb Book, Love Our Children USA, The Kristin Helms Internet Safety Foundation, Cati Cares.

Also read on Examiner.com

Investigators say William Melchert-Dinke visited online suicide chat rooms and offered depressed people step-by-step instructions on how to kill themselves.

He is under investigation in at least two deaths and could face criminal charges. His nursing license was revoked in June.

Source:
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=113892522&ft=1&f=1001

Does your child, teen or do you venture into “Chat Rooms” online? Chat rooms are among the riskiest places on the Net for children and teens. Most Internet Predators are lingering waiting for their next victim in a variety of chat rooms. Don’t allow it to be your child.

As a Parent Advocate, I encourage all parents to take the steps to educate your children about cyber safety with a strong emphasis on chat room safety. October is National Cyber Safety Awareness Month, which is a reason for you to set aside time to sit with your kids and discuss what lurks online.

Here are some great Chat Room safety tips from Connect Safely to share with your family:

Remember that what you say in a chat room or instant messaging session is live — you can’t take it back or delete it later.

Don’t say anything you wouldn’t want the public to know — this includes your full name, your address, phone number of other personal information.

Don’t get together with someone you meet in a chat room. If you must, meet in a public place and bring along some friends.

Don’t reveal your actual location or when and where you plan to hang out.

Choose a nickname that’s not sexually suggestive and doesn’t give away your real name.

If someone says or does something creepy, block them and don’t respond.

Just sign out if the topic turns to sex. That can often lead somewhere you don’t want to go.

For more info: Connect Safely,iKeepSafe, ReputationDefender/MyChild, Google Bomb Book, Love Our Children USA, The Kristin Helms Internet Safety Foundation, Cati Cares.

Also on Examiner.com

I’m excited. This is my 400th blog post and I also get to introduce a new tool social media tool that could be a great help to your agency to connect with prospective clients.

I was exploring some new tools that would provide some better ways to have personal conversations with followers of my blog. I found a great tool called Chatroll. I’ve been very impressed. Within several minutes I was able to create a FUEL LINES chat room, post it to my blog and promote it through Twitter. Within minutes of going live I was joined by @MikeMorawski, from Detroit who reads my blog. A good conversation.

Hopefully this new tool will allow me to connect with more readers on a regular basis. It should also be a great tool for your agency’s blog to allow you to communicate with your target audience. So lets explore its possibilities together.

I’ll be live from 12 noon to 1 pm (EST) today, Wednesday and hopefully the same day/time each week.

Apart from the chat rooms, instant messengers and electronic mails created for communication and dialogue beyond turf are the emerging innovations that help man build opportunities for interaction. The need for a personalized and human face aspect of building online communities is slowly changing the technological landscape of the Internet.

Blogs / “weblogs” or blogging are the newest gift of Internet technology to people all over the world. These are updated posts, crop up entries or personalized life snippets, of mundane or bizarre in nature. For most, a “blog” is a personal, unedited, and authentic journal meant to be shared in an online community. Blog site is a place where bloggers can publish anything; his thoughts, feelings, photos, special events, experiences, comments on issues and so on. It is more of an online diary with videos, links, documents, newsletters and opinions on just about any topics you are interested.

Blogs are made to welcome the insights and opinions of all and therefore, should not be written to sound intimidating and too formal. This kind of blog is a sure way to put off the readers. In the basics of blogging, conversational tone would be more appropriate to reach the desired audience.

Blogging is all about individuals reaching out to other individuals. Having a blog has its own set of advantages:

1. Freedom of Expression. If you want people to hear you out and give their own opinion, this is the best way to create a line of communication;

2. Networking is at its best. Having a blog is a good platform for exchanging genuine ideas from consumers to you as marketer of a certain product. Sound opinion and point of view is better than just showing the price quote;

3. Excellent advertising platform. Blogging is a new way to advertise products, a refreshing change from the traditional advertising outlets and it is cost-effective.

4. Gauging public opinion on products and services. The key is nice and catchy titles with new ideas presented in your content. This is an assurance of quick and repeated responses from your readers. Blogs is an excellent spot for the exchange of ideas between the seller and the consumer. Good for measuring public opinion regarding services and products, even political and business matters alike.

5. Useful tool for internal communication. This will help your company to build a knowledge-based community of employees. Also good for harnessing employee relations and identifying human resource issues in advance.

6. Other benefits like search engine optimization (SEO) will help your blogs to be seen often by as many people as you wish. This is very good exposure for your products and services.

Many blog hosting services are available on the Internet. But the basic question is which one of the services will be the best to start off your business blog program? Business people are usually clueless to recent technological innovations which would help them maximize their marketing potentials. For these beginners, it is best to study first the services offered by blog hosts. An ineffective business blogging program may damage marketing opportunities instead of enriching them.

A company may decide to do the following depending on its capacity and needs:
1) Host their own blog service,
2) Pay someone else to host the service, or
3) Setup a “blog aggregator page” and ask the employees to select their blog hosting services individually. There are paid and free services available for individuals.

For business blogs, they are required to have the latest blogging features; if not, this will prevent them from maximizing their marketing, public relations and SEO potentials.

Keep in mind that blogs should have the following basic essentials:

COMMENTS. Welcoming comments provide opportunity for dialogue. In business blogs, they are a good customer feedback mechanism. This helps develop better customer relations based from loyalty and trust. Blogging is an innovative way to converse with your customers.

TRACKBACK. This helps in maximizing company and product exposure. Through this service, consumers can get back to you for more posts and updates without the difficulty of locating you. If your blog is popular in a specific online community chances are links going back to your blog site are everywhere online, other blog sites or even websites.

CATEGORIES AND TAGS. These both help in classifying blog searches for ease of navigation and on site search. Categories act as libraries because it classifies posts by subject matter such as business, distance learning, e-commerce, online auctions, etc. Tags, help in the classification, especially in the blog search engine Technorati. Possible customers and new clients locate blogs about certain topics of interest by just clicking the tags.

RSS FEED. Really Simple Syndication is the feed from your blog that is sent out over the internet, and collected through the various newsreaders and aggregators.

If your company is to establish a business blogging program, considerable options should be made available by the hosting companies shortlisted for the services. Free blog hosting services are popular but they are much appropriate for individual online journals. Paid blog hosting services offer unlimited packages best for your company’s needs. You may want to suggest checking out some blogs that use the host first, read and examine their layout and design. Another important thing to consider is a reliable technical support the host has.

After, choosing the blog host, a team should be ready to plan the design and structure of the blog: The team should:
1. create a style that meets the needs of the audience;
2. establish an open, credible tone;
3. schedule weekly updating of blog – ideally, a few times a week;
4. include weblinks of other website and blogs;
5. blog post should be in the “first person;”
6. focus on the business blog objective; and,
7. maintain an honest, engaging conversational quality.

Remember, whatever the look, style and content found on your blog is a reflection of you and your company.

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Source: http://www.articlealley.com

People have always looked for a good way to communicate, and through time the most important advances have always been better ways for people to talk to each other. Today there are dozens of different ways for people to get in touch with each other, but the internet is king for talking with many people at once. Chat rooms, bulletin boards, email, blogs and instant messages are all available along with everything from Twitter to Facebook, and each one has its purpose. Blogs are great for small business to get word of mouth circulating through the public by starting a conversation with many people. They also have several different functions to get customers to your website and buying your products.

The first and most important thing that a blog will do for your business is to introduce you to the public and get the ball rolling. Blogs are giant social conversations that involve lots of people, and those people know lots of other people, and so on. If you are offering a product or service, this is the perfect medium to get people fired up about it and inspire them to tell others. Most small businesses survive by word of mouth advertising, and blogs provide that for free.

The second big advantage to using blogs is the increased traffic to your website. Including a link to your website along with your post will help customers find you after reading your blog post. If you have a brand name that matches your website URL, then including a link with your post is a no-brainer. Your website link will remain on that blog post forever, and people will continue to find it for months and years after you posted it. The more blog conversations you participate in, the more of your links will be out there for people to find and in turn find you.

The third part of blog posts is their usefulness in getting your website to score well in the search engine results. The more links you have pointing to your site from other sites, the more important the search engines think your website is. You may even find your website on the front page of Google for your keyword after many conversations on blogs. Scoring high in the search engines will give you the largest amount of customers and getting there with blog posts is completely free. Companies that rank high in the search engines usually have to pay SEO companies thousands of dollars a month, and those SEO companies work their magic through blogs.

Through the years advances in communication have come faster and faster. There is no telling what the next big thing will be, but blogs are it for now. I started my blog several years ago and it has revolutionized my business, not to mention making lots of new friends that I otherwise wouldn’t have met. If you own a small business and you want to make it into a large business, don’t underestimate the simple little blog!

Source: www.articlealley.com

Chat rooms… There are many different types of chatrooms located everywhere on the internet. These would be a great way to get people involved in discussions. After our exercise in class (MCCNM 336 CSU-Pueblo), using a chatroom as a device to discuss the topic of the Digital Divide in class.

After the class exercise, it rung a bell and this could be used by corperations with there employees to find the strengths and weaknesses of each area. I run a company and would like to use this to compare research and use it for development. I think it would be a great tool, because people wouldn’t be afraid to voice there opinion! Especially if the elites of the corperation are running the chat room.

I do wonder why we have all of these great technologies and use them for useless entertainmenat!?

Downfall: lose interpersonal contact… a lot.

True recovery has required me to take courage and face the ugliness of addictive behavior and its impact on relationships.  I had to acknowledge the problem and accept its seriousness.  More importantly I have had to accept the responsibility for dealing with it.  I am not proud of these behaviors but by sharing them openly helps me deal with the ugliness and moves me into a state of healing and recovery.  So here is a list of all of my behaviors in all of their authenticiy to help me break through denial.

As a victim of sexual abuse from four to eleven years old I was regularly sodomized and participated in oral sex. I despised the anal sex and only reciprocated a couple of times, that I can remember, it felt dirty and ugly.  The oral sex on the other hand was extremely pleasurable and to this day I still have thoughts around it that I am processing and doing recovery work.  My sexual appetite was activated at a very early age and has lead to a lifetime of masturbation that I am now learning to address as an addictive behavior.  As a youth I also looked at pornography as I found it hidden around the house.  I new it was odd that I would find my self looking at masculine perfect men, their naked muscles and of course their erected penis.  There were many locker room fantasies and experiences with voyeurism in my youth and the perpetual fear of getting an erection in the locker room shower.  Unlike today’s school system, we always showered together as youth in open showers as well as in college.

As I moved into college AOL and the internet were starting to emerge on the scene and I discovered gay pornography and chat rooms.  I also discovered men for men personal ads in a variety of college papers and alternative publications.  I would often fantasize about responding to these ads and hooking up.  One semester in college I found it highly arousing to check out all of the bathroom graffiti in targeted locations and once could hear the guy in the next stall masturbating.  I so badly wanted to join him but held back.  He even invited me to join him by tapping his foot a couple of times.  I decided to exit as quickly as possible.  I have always loved masturbation and have connected it to a strong sense of masculinity.  The idea of feeling warm semen flowing through my pubic hair has been a fetish of mine.

Over the years, technology improved and I experienced the excitement of Microsoft and Yahoo messenger.  At first it was just exploring profiles, but soon lead to sex chat rooms, voice over internet sex talk and eventually online cam sex.  These were extremely erotic experiences and easily sent me into an addictive cycle that would take months or sometimes years to break out of on my own.  It was at these early stages that I posted a profile on Hot-Or-Not website and tended to want to connect to all of the masculine well built men who were bisexual.  My wife even caught me on this site once and I was able to explain it away very quickly.  During this time, I also discovered online gay movies.  I do remember connecting with one guy on yahoo and gave out my cell phone number.  This turned into several erotic conversations and eventually phone sex.  I was on vacation at the time with my family and could not believe that I had engaged in such a behavior.   Had this individual been in the area I would have probably hooked up.

There were a couple of times on trips that I was picked up on by guys in the steam room and sauna.  I can still see them to this day.  They were incredibly masculine, well built and very triggering for me. Muscular men have been triggering to me.  Some how I was able to walk away from the experiences.  I eventually found Craig’s List and started to browse the personals regularly just trying to find other married guys who were struggling the same way that I was.

I was very unprepared for what had been opened up inside of me after I came back from my Journey into Manhood.   I had an overwhelming desire to be held by masculine men and/or to be touched through massage.  This led to actually corresponding with men on Craigs List and going to M4M Massage sites.   I had my  first mutual nude massage on a bed while traveling and it was an incredible sensual experience.  This led to a new addictive cycle of nude massages, frot, being masturbated and being invited for felatio.  I eventually started comunicating more actively on Craigs List and had my first hook ups with guys interested in mutual massage.  I did not engage with them sexually but I did get introduced to kissing and showering together which were also very sensual experience.  I realized that I had real needs and was finally able to connect with others who have similar needs for holding and cuddling.  This sometimes turned into spooning and I could feel their erection through my clothing.  I wanted to continue to experience frot.  To this day connecting with another masculine man in a non-sexual way is still a very strong need. I have a clearer understanding of what those needs are and my own self perception of masculinity.  I do enjoy sleeping in the same bed overnight with another man but that has been put on hold with the new boundaries I have set with my wife.

I did have a couple of experiences with prostate massage.  It was very stimulating but brought up a lot of emotional trauma for me as I remembered what it was like to be abused as a child.  I continue to work on my recovery and step directly into my triggers to defuse them.  Most of all of this for me is not about having sex with a guy but true male bonding and friendship at a very deep level I am still trying to work through all of this balance in my recovery work. I have cruised in the past Fitness sites, Gay Hookup Sites, YouTube Muscle Worship Videos, Facebook Profiles and Twitter Profiles.  I still find myself wandering sometimes on Twitter which I need to continue to work on with my recovery tools.  I have also been exposed to the new iPhone social networking apps that could hook me up in a matter of seconds with a variety of willing participants just a click away.

I have at this point summarized and shared these experiences with my wife and church leaders in an effort for me to recover and have also shared these details with my recovery group.  As hard as it is to see these events written down and the memories associated with them it is also extremely freeing.

So today I was thinking and I have always wanted to join a book club but I do not really know that many people in my area who actually really like reading. I have looked for other online book clubs but nothing really caught my eye…

So I figured I would start an online book club! I thew the idea out on twitter and I got a few responses that people wanted to participate which is WONDERFUL! It really made me excited. Now I am trying to work things out in my head but it would be great if anyone wanted to put in input as well.

I was thinking that we would do 1 book a month (depending on the length) if its short then maybe 2 books a month but if it is long then maybe take a month and a half or 2 for the book…

Each month a member can pick a different book and the group will read the book so everyone has a chance to pick a book or I can also hold a poll on the blog and everyone can vote for the next book.

Also we would have meeting times where we would all get online to chat about the book. I have come across this really cool website where we can make our own chat rooms and even have video and sound which is really cool.. (in my opinion) Now you do not HAVE to have a webcam to participate but it would be fun! (and we will be keeping it clean lol no dirty or nudie people in the chat room) This would be a great way to network and meet other people and share our love for reading and even make new friends!

Now for the first book I want to do something by Jen Lancaster because I am falling in love with her books and she is a great writer and her books are not boring at all! I have read bitter is the new black which is the first book in her series so I think I may make that the first book just so everyone will be on the same page for other books of hers if we choose to read them!

Please let me know what you think!!

From words that may describe the works of the internet, the internet should be used for fun and for work. There is one thing that I would NOT even try to do. Number one, never give out your phone number, your address, and any other personal information because there are people out there that are sick and not so friendly. I, especially, know about some things about the internet. I just want to say one thing, NEVER EVER meet anyone over the internet. There is a lot of things that can happen. You could get stranded, you could be taken advantage of, and also you could never return back to where you came from. In other words, when you are chatting with someone, be careful with who you chat with because they may not be the person they say they are. They can give you a false address, false name, false phone number leaving you stranded in the middle of nowhere making you scared. Also, when you meet someone online, be sure you talk to them for a long period of time to get to know them because when you come to meet them, they can take advantage of you. Now, what I mean by “taking advantage” is you could molested, raped, or even killed. So, I would watch what you say, do , and chat to people on any website, no matter what it is. Just remember this, you look at this when you open it. You open this and what do you see? Things that you know you shouldn’t do that you think you should do, but I am very sorry to tell you the answer is NO. I hope when you open this, you will look at it, and you will think really, really hard about the choices that you make. I wouldn’t be writing this if I didn’t care. I never ever want to see anyone hurt; that is my whole intentions of writing this.

Okay, I am going to talk about something I did. I took a bus, I met the girl, and all she wanted was sex and money. I had to stay with her best friend, which I really didn’t understand. Then they wanted to kick me out, and then I walked and walked around the streets and called my grandparents, and they said that they would send a bus for me, but the girl did pay my grandparents back. I had to go home back to Illinois, and boy was I in some big trouble. That just goes to show you, you don’t mess around on the internet. Also, I had another experience where I met this girl on the website called “my yearbook” (which is a site I would not recommend to anyone)Anyways, this girl I supposedly met had a husband. Well, me and my girlfriend at the time became friends with them. Well, that went okay for awhile. Then, me and my girlfriend announce we are getting married, and they never call us again. We thought that this couple were actual friends, but circumstances have happened that caused a lot of friction and distance in the friendship. We didn’t know them as well as we thought we did. They were against the idea of us being married. There is more to this than what is being told, but due to personal reasons, I can not discuss them. So, I am ending with this saying. If you want to play on the internet, be careful, safe, and watch what you are doing because one of these times it is going to come back at you and bite you in the butt.

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