I’m a NCIS fan. Because of that, I watched the NCIS and NCIS: Los Angles premieres. Anyway, when I watched the NCIS: Los Angles premiere, I immediately thought that the actress who plays Hetty Lange looked like Edna Mode, the character that created the uniforms for the Incredibles, in the movie The Incredibles. Personally, I just found it really freaky that they look so much alike. I would say that they based Edna Mode on Linda Hunt. Anyway, I just found it freaky.

The New York Daily News has a fun photo round-up of TV’s “yummiest guy candy.” My Top 10 are here.

See all the pix…

Por que às vezes assistir a filmes ruins pode ser um ótimo exercício crítico? [que roteiro cagado!]
Por que adaptações de games são sempre intrigantes? [kkk]
Por que o Mark Wahlberg é um ótimo herói loser com cara de ‘bofe que faz’?
Por que o fofo do Chris O’Donnell reapareceu no cinema de forma tão inexpressiva? [tadinho...]
Por que a Nelly Furtado fez sua estréia no cinema fazendo essa pontinha? [e ainda bem que foi só uma pontinha.P]
Por que eu elogiaria as cenas de ação desse filme? rum1…

When did this happen exactly? When did going around, looking like Don Johnson from Miami Vice become cool again? Granted, Hugh Laurie from “House” has had that 12 o’clock shadow going on for as long as the show has been running and Dave Annable from “Brothers and Sisters” has gravitated between a stubbled stud and clean-shaven saint for a couple of years now. Even Thad Luckinbill from “Young and the Restless” has exhibited some stubble now and then, although his facial hair is so light it is hardly noticeable unless actively searching it out. Three or four actors sporting this look I can handle, but things have gotten out of control. On TV this season, there has been an explosion of men who are letting their whiskers get out of control, sprouting in really unattractive ways. Jesse Spencer from “House” has gray patches amongst his stubble; Jon Foster from “Accidentally on Purpose” now looks like a middle-aged man instead of the 22-year-old that  he’s supposed to be playing with his new heavy crop of facial hair (thanks for toning it down in the episodes since); Chris O’Donnell from “NCIS: Los Angeles” has stubble that is patchy at best, causing him to look like a homeless person and the list of messy looking men goes on and on.

News Flash, guys- these stubbled looks are not cool!!

The only thing that it succeeds in doing is letting the opposite sex, watching your shows, know that you don’t care about your appearance enough to run a razor over your face in the morning. I do realize that some of you need the stubble to define your tortured characters, but come on guys, some of you need to begin to take little more pride in your character’s appearances.

Think of it like this- most guys expect women to shave their legs regularly, creating a hair-free environment on the face should follow the same principle.

It’s a total turnoff to the female viewer to see a bunch a bescraggled (if this isn’t a word yet, I call dibs!) guys trying to play viable leading men. Your faces are highlighted everytime that your shows air. Why do you want to look like you just rolled out of bed and came to work sans shower and shave? Such disregard for one’s appearance makes the viewer wonder what you’re trying to hide under that mess.

As far as I am aware, we have not travelled back in time to the 1800s where facial hair was all the rage and basically a prerequisite for distinguished men. Stubble, no matter how short, still has the nasty habit of catching stray food. Plus, the prospects of  making out with a stubble grower are not generously accepted by any girl, let alone actresses, due to the subsequent rug burn that follows such a session.  

It is also worth considering what message this behavior is sending to our too-young-to-shave-yet guys. If I were one of these souls, it would speak to me in the following way, ”Don’t give a crap about your appearance. The slacker/stoner look is just fine. “  But the problem is that this look is not fine and Hollywood pushing the bescraggled visage is upsetting.

So a bit of advice, Hollywood men, and please do take this to heart. Go find those razors and use them everyday without fail because a beautiful clean-shaven face is a horrible thing to squander.

5. Remove the Car Bomb-Transporter 2

I actually forgot why I even decided to see Transporter 2.  Never did see the first one, the second didn’t look great and I never saw the third either.  However, I did wind up seeing the film and it’s one that has disbelief written all over it.  One scene in particular, however, left me completely speechless at how bluntly unrealistic it was.  If you’ve seen the film, then you know that Statham’s car winds up having a bomb under it so what does he do?  He jumps off a ramp causing his car to spin around, the bottom of the car barely scrapes a crane hook that perfectly removes the bomb without issue and he still lands with little to no problem.  Normally I’d go into more detail, but I think watching the scene yourself should put it into perspective.

4. Refrigerator vs. Nuke-Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

The Indiana Jones films have always been a favorite of mine.  Though Temple of Doom was always my childhood favorite, the other two (of the original trilogy) have since grown on me and I actually enjoy Last Crusade the most.  So it goes without saying I was quite curious as to how good Kingdom of the Crystal Skull would be.  Unfortunately, it does not hold a flag to its predecessors and there’s one scene in particular that I whispered to myself “I do believe that this is the most unrealistic scene ever.”  Towards the beginning, Jones finds out that he’s in an area about to be nuked so what does he do?  He hides in a refrigerator.  And since this is shortly into the film with our hero’s life at stake he of course manages to survive with the fridge conveniently being the only object that gets blasted away and lands in tact.

3. Needle vs. Bullet to the Skin-Far Cry

Alright, just so everyone knows, I actually how not seen this film and I never intend to.  I shelled money out for an Uwe Boll film once before and I will never do so again.  But I saw a review for this film which went through the entire film and one part that stood out in an idiotic way was towards the beginning when the super soldiers are tested.  During this scene, we find that the mutated skin can essentially bounce bullets back like rubber but after things go out of control they manage to suppress it with a needle to the skin.  That’s right, the skin is impervious to bullets yet needles go in without an issue.  Figure that out on your own.

2. Spin Back Time-Superman

I’m going to shamelessly admit that I haven’t seen any of the original Superman films.  In fact, other than the most recent film, Superman Returns, all I’ve seen of Superman at all are gameplay videos of Superman on the N64 and him in the TV show Justice League.  So it should go without saying I know about this scene from someone who did a video on the film and the turned out to be one by Doug Walker aka the Nostalgia Critic.  The video was a Top 11 countdown of the dumbest Superman moments and at number one was when Superman turns the world back to reverse time.  Apparently causing the Earth’s rotation to reverse would be the key to spinning back time.  I guess I’d better build a really fast airplane to do this and bring me back to my high school days.

1. Every Scene-Batman & Robin

Even though this list is supposed to be for single scenes from a single film, Joel Schumacher’s hilariously bad sequel to Batman Forever (which he also directed) has so many impossible scenes packed in together that I really can’t think of any other film that hits quite as low.  I won’t state every one of the scenes but here’s just a few of them:  Schwarzenegger surviving water that’s 50 degrees below zero, his freeze gun landing on top of a curved statue perfectly like a magnet, Batgirl jumping off her motorcycle onto Robin’s…swamp-like machine for a few seconds to jump back on her bike which has managed to keep up with the Batmobile and Robin without falling over, the bathooks always managing to hit/grab surfaces strong enough to pull our heroes forward, Batman and Robin air surfing using doors as boards while casually heading back down to the ground, etc.  If a single movie can actually top the level of implausibility here, then I think we’re in trouble.

I really need a massage. Hopefully at the end of this month I’ll be at that villa with the massage chair. I so want a massage chair.

I’d really like to see “In love and war” again. The one with Chris O’Donnell and Sandra Bullock. Haven’t seen it in ages. I miss Chris. And he really plays a lovely part in that flick. Mmmmmhm. Meow.

Just to let you know, things will be somewhat quiet here this week, as I’m scrambling around like pan o’ breakfast trying to get the new Boyfriend of the Week write-up posted before October expires.  (Not just because I’m trying to get at least one lame write-up posted every month (although, that too), but because he needs to make it up BY HALLOWEEN, or else there goes all the fun.  That’s the only hint yer gettin’, so don’t try for more, my peoples.)

While we’re waiting, though, let’s have some conversation.  Everybody tell me in comments which of the new Fall TV shows you are still watching and enjoying?  Here’s what’s still on my list:

Glee – I’m behind by three episodes, but I WAS behind by six until this past weekend and then I started to get caught up and got all sucked in again.  That said, I confess nothing gets my dander up like a subplot involving a faked pregnancy being used to trick an unhappy husband into staying in an awful marriage.  Newsflash to men everywhere:  Most women would never, ever consider doing something like that.  I promise, we wouldn’t.  We. Would. Not.  In any case, this is a subplot that I feel is not only grossly cliché and completely out of place in the show itself, but one I think we women ought to be downright offended by.  If you’re not offended by it, rest assured that I am offended on your behalf.  Wrap that shit up, Glee, and give me more songs by Journey or I may bail before the year’s out.  You’re on alert, yo.

The Forgotten — I recognize that this is not a good show.  That said, you know what?  I’m enjoying it anyway.  I really like Christian Slater; I can’t help myself.  And even though everybody starts off dead and so there is never a happy ending, I kind of like the concept behind this series — a show about a group of volunteers with various sorts of skills who spend their free time working as amateur sleuths.  I love sleuthing — it’s why I became a librarian, in fact.  In any case, while I haven’t been overly impressed so far with the plots, it MIGHT get better.  It COULD get better.  I’ll hang in a little while longer.

NCIS: Los Angeles — Oh, please, I KNOW this one is not a good show.  I’m still watching this one just because every episode is so amazingly stupid and bad, it is absolutely hilarious.  I laugh out loud no fewer than 8 times per episode, which is more than The Daily Show gets out of me half the time these days.  Oh god, I love this one.  I LOVE IT.  I have never seen a show this ridiculous.  It’s totally awesome.  Plus, I will never get tired of looking at L. L. Cool J’s butt, no matter how old I get.  Or how old he gets.  May we grow old together, in fact, me and L. L Cool J.  And L. L. Cool J’s butt.  All three of us, old.  Together.  Forever.

Flash Forward — I’m behind by three episodes, and I think it’s because. . . meh.  I mean, I like the concept of this series, and I fully intend to get caught up (this weekend, even).  But I haven’t gotten sucked into it that solidly yet.  Not like I got with Lost, certainly.  I never fell behind on a single episode of Lost until season three, come to think of it, but I started falling behind on FF on EPISODE three.  Probably not a great sign.  That said, I’m still IN.  I’m just not IN all the way.  I’m sort of hokey-pokey-in.  One foot, one hand, shakin’ it all about.  What do you guys think of this one?  If it lasts long enough, Joseph Fiennes or John Cho for Boyfriend of the Week?  Both?

Three Rivers – It’s terrible, I know it.  Stop, I know it.  But still.  Of the three new medical shows (Mercy and Trauma being the other two), it’s the only one I watched a second episode of, and even though I haven’t then watched any more, I’m letting them pile up on the DVR for a rainy day and am even sort of looking forward to the day that rainy day finally arrives.  Incidentally, I recently went to the ER myself and guess what was playing on the TV while I was there — Mercy and Trauma. I motioned to the TV set and said to the doctor, “Really? Isn’t that kind of like playing Castaway on an airplane?”   And he laughed and said the nurses liked it.  Personally?  I think health care reform needs to start RIGHT THERE.

I think this is it for me and the NEW shows this year.  I’d love to hear what you guys are watching (is anybody still watching Eastwick, for example?  How’s it going?  Did you guys end up loving The Good Wife?  What did I miss that I ought to check out?  Any of the new sit-coms good?).  Hit the comments and chat us all up and together, we’ll make it to the next Boyfriend of the Week write-up, due FRIDAY come hell or high water.  (Or, more likely here in Seattle, a hell OF high water.)

This is such a lame jokey reference, and yet I laugh each time.

Bruce: Where will you go? The circus must be halfway to Metropolis by now.
– Batman Forever (1995).

My daughter watched me do this one, and she said, “Strange words that you typed.”

“Strange? They’re not strange, what do you mea — oh, because they’re in a language you can’t read?”

She looked at me like I was Grimace from Ronald McDonaldland and said slowly, “Yes. Because of that.”

“That’s a programming language. It’s called HTML.”

“What does that mean?”

“‘Hypertext markup language.’ It tells the internet what to do.”

“You tell the internet what to do?”

“Yes, I am the boss of the internet.”

She digested this for a moment then shook her head. “No. No, you wouldn’t be.”

Sick burn.

The Guardian’s Will Dean, who writes their ‘Watch This’, asked ’so what do we know?’ this week. Not much, but it’s always fun to say clever and sarcastic things about that which we don’t know all that much about. Just watch me!

We’re gratified, but surprised, to find that Sky have bought NCIS:Los Angeles. I suppose that once they discovered the number of viewers, they felt it was a ‘must have’. Or perhaps FX didn’t want it. Who knows? Channel Five openly admit to not knowing much on their website. They only know two weeks in advance they say. I’d say they are only willing to tell their customers two weeks in advance. That’s different. And if it’s not under FAQs, then don’t bother asking, because they won’t know either.

I wonder if Sky realise that NCIS:Los Angeles have all these people watching, because they have just watched NCIS? They are sandwiched together for a reason. As Will Dean says ‘it’s easy to sneer – and the clunky dialogue and daft edits seem designed to elicit such a reaction – but this is currently the second biggest show in the States.’ So what does he know?

It is well done, but you have to fall in love first. And that may be harder if you jump in somewhere in the middle of it all. You can do with some background. What I thought as I watched last week’s episode – the one with a ’second Callen’ type – was that it’s a bit like doing something in the company of your best friend’s other best friend. It can work just fine, or it can be a little tricky to get on.

And no, I won’t be putting any pictures up here of any of the actors if they are not wearing clothes, so just go away if that’s what you came for. Honestly! Search engines!

När Gotham City hotas av en dödlig allians bestående av Mr Freeze (Arnold Schwarzenegger) och Poison Ivy (Uma Thurman) är det tur att Batman (George Clooney) får hjälp av de unga brottsbekämparna Robin (Chris O’Donnell) och Batgirl (Alicia Silverstone).

Jag har väl aldrig riktigt förstått de här filmerna om den maskerade hämnaren, i alla fall inte de innan Christian Bale axlade rollen som Batman. Det blir så plastigt, grällt och barnsligt så det är svårt att ta till sig och samtidigt som det kan tyckas fjantigt är de stundtals rätt brutala. Den här är väl knappast vare sig bättre eller sämre än de andra utan de flaxar runt och slåss i vanlig ordning. Mest uppmärksamhet fick filmen för att homosexuella regissören Joel Schumacher satte bröstvårtor på Robin och Batmans gummidräkter. I Sverige blev det också en del bonushype då svenskan Vendela Kirsebom Thomessen spelade en mindre roll som nedfryst läkarhustru.

Betyg: 2

La franquicia de Batman es una montaña rusa de ires y venires, de cómo la Warner Brothers se imagina sus episodios y de cómo cada uno de sus directores le apuesta a algo creativo (si es que se puede llamar creativo el vacío intento de Joel Schumacher en 1997 con su Batman & Robin).

Batman es la creación de Bob Cane, un norteamericano que se hizo millonario al venderle derechos patrimoniales de la franquicia a DC Comics, claremente aprendió de los errores de Joe Shuster y Jerry Siegel que inventaron Superman basados en la teoría del súper-hombre de Nietzsche y fueron estafados ingenuamente por la DC Comics. Cane aprovechó todo el potencial de su personaje y se hizo muy popular primero por la excentricidad del millonario que encarnaba y porque era el único súper héroe que no poseía poderes sobrenaturales.

Gracias a Frank Miller el excéntrico millonario dejó de ser colorido y extrovertido para convertirse en un hombre solitario, abnegado y lleno de miedos internos. Tim Burton en 1989 con Michael Keaton fue el primero en llevarlo al celuloide con Batman; su antagónico era el Joker interpretado por Jack Nicholson y como raro, una nominación al Oscar. El mismo Burton en 1992 repite con Michael Keaton y develan una segunda parte de la franquicia con Batman Returns esta vez los villanos eran Michelle Pfeiffer como Catwoman y Danny DeVito como el Penguin, acompañados de Christopher Walken un verdadero villano.

Todo pintaba a que la tercera parte de la saga la iba a hacer de nuevo Tim Burton pero la Warner dijo que se estaban haciendo demasiado oscuras estas pelis, que eso no era comercial, por lo cual le pasó la batuta a Joel Schumacher y en 1995 al lado de Val Kilmer como el nuevo Bruce Wayne sacaron Batman Forever. Lo positivo un excelente Edward Nygma, Riddler interpretado por Jim Carrey, acompañado por Tommy Lee Jones como Harvey Dent, Two Faces. Lo pésimo, la mala caracterización de Kilmer, la pobre presencia de Nicole Kidman y la terrible aparición de Chris O’Donnell.

No sólo fue mala, sino que le dieron una segunda oprotunidad a Schumacher y sacó en 1997 Batman & Robin. No tengo nada en contra de los homosexuales pero fue el Batman más gay de la historia de todos los hombres murciélago. Tomas cerradas a las nalgas de George Clooney, los pechos de Batman y Robin y una Alicia Silverstone de muy regular actuación. Uma Thurman actúa aquí pero pasa desapercibida el verdadero éxito de la peli Mr. Freeze interpretado por Arnold Schwarzenegger en un disfraz increíble.

Tuvieron que pasar ocho años, para que los fanáticos sanáramos nuestras heridas de decepción y repulsión para ver el nacimiento del nuevo Batman.

En 2005, con guión escrito por Christopher Nolan sale Batman Begins. Christian Bale es el nuevo Bruce Wayne, Michael Caine como Alfred, Gary Oldman como James Gordon y un reparto de lujo con excelentes actuaciones. La historia vuelve a las raíces de Frank Miller y se explora un súper héroe vulnerable que redefine sus miedos y los potencia para salir adelante. Una excelentente narración, un humor muy sofisticado, nos muestra un diamante en bruto, un batman en proceso de formación, de madurez, de realización personal.

La música es magistralmente dirigida por Hans Zimmer y James Newton Howard. Se aleja de la fanfarria caricaturesca de sus antecesores (a excepción de Danny Elfman que lo hizo formidablemente) y le imprime un aire de misterio perfectamente amalgamado con la historia.

El reparto, como lo decía antes, es un quita-aliento desde Morgan Freeman pasando por Liam Neeson, Cillian Murphy, Rutger Hauer, hasta el fantástico Tom Wilkinson. Y lo más bonito es que aunque el protagonismo de los villanos es liderado por Ra’s Al Ghul los malos son realmente de la vida real como el mismo Bruce Wayne, a quién temerle más que a un puñado de locos que se acaban de escapar de un manicomio, auna camada de ciudadanos en plena histeria o a un grupo de vengativos mafiosos que se pasan la ley por donde mejor les parece.

Batman Begins es el retorno del hombre oscuro que toma la justicia por sus manos… Un paraco, si. Pero por ahora divertido y con una ética inquebrantable.

]]> http://culturewitch.wordpress.com/2009/10/10/ncis-los-angeles-continues/ Sat, 10 Oct 2009 21:04:43 +0000 bookwitch http://culturewitch.wordpress.com/2009/10/10/ncis-los-angeles-continues/

I’ve not yet fallen for the LA characters, as I did with NCIS. Actually, that’s inaccurate. It did take a while to become friends with Gibbs and Co, but I loved Ducky from the start, and what’s more; I felt the characters were trying to act normal. I also felt they were recreating as normal an NCIS setting as possible. LA is beginning to feel fantastic and unreal.

Or is it just me?

The episodes are well written, so are worth watching. But they don’t have that extra special something, yet.

The office. What kind of office is that? (Photo © CBS)

And that tune. I barely notice it, and I wouldn’t recognise it. I gather it’s great. Daughter wanted it as her ringtone. So she set about getting it, only to find when she had done so, that Son already had it as his.

Oh well. At least they agree on something.

Land of Punt’s new favorite show is getting a new character. NCIS: Los Angeles has cast Monet Mazu to play Callen’s (Chris O’Donnell) love interest.

Mazu will play Natalie Buccola, a secret service agent who becomes smitten with the mysterious Callen. Poor LL Cool J, always the bridesmaid.

Buccola will make her first appearance in episode six. Will it be her last? Maybe not. The character may appear in more than one episode.

Sunday, two-time Tony Award nominee Tony Roberts fell off the stage at the Samuel J. Friedman Theatre. Roberts is currently in a production of The Royal Family.

In his first appearance on stage Roberts spoke incoherently. He took a seat on stage but still couldn’t speak clearly. Co-star John Glover, while still in character, ushered Roberts off the stage. Moments later the curtain fell and the production asked if there was a doctor in the house (yes, they actually do that).

The show was soon cancelled. Sadly, it was a preview show for critics. The show is scheduled to open Oct. 8.

A hospital spokesman says Roberts is in stable condition (stroke?).

Mitchell Hurwitz and James Vallely are currently writing the script for the movie version of Arrested Development. Hurwitz will director the film.

It better be good. This movie has the hype, at least from its 100 fans, that is usually reserved for a big budget action flick.

Hurwitz and Vallely didn’t want to begin script writing until all the principal actors have signed on.

If all goes well, production may start in the spring.

15 nuevas series han sido lanzadas las últimas 3 semanas en los Estados Unidos.

De entre ellos ya tenemos una serie que se convierte en la revelación de la temporada, NCIS Los Angeles, y además podemos decir que las novedades de ABC “Cougar Town” y “Flash Forward” realizaron un comienzo excelente.

Entre las series lanzadas hace ya más de una semana, una ya fue renovada para su primera temporada completa de 22 episodios (“Glee”) y otra ha sido cancelada después de 2 episodios (“The Beautiful Life”). “Community” se desmoronó desde el segundo episodio (-2.50 millones) y “Melrose Place” tiende hacia los datos de “The Beautiful Life” (1.44 millón para el episodio 3) lo cual es un mal presagio. “Glee” y “The Vampire Diaries” consiguieron estabilizarse perdiendo sólo un millón de telespectadores con relación a su premiere para los episodios 2 y 3.

1. NCIS Los Angeles – CBS : 18.73 millones (4.4)
2. The Good Wife – CBS : 13.71 millones (3.1)
3. Modern Family – ABC : 12.61 millones (4.2)
4. Flash Forward – ABC : 12.47 millones (4.0)
5. Cougar Town – ABC : 11.28 millones (4.4)
6. The Forgotten – ABC : 9.54 millones (2.6)
7. Accidentaly On Purpose – CBS : 8.91 millones (3.3)
8. Eastwick – ABC : 8.50 millones (3.0)
9. Mercy – NBC : 8.38 millones (2.3)
10. Community – NBC : 7.89 millones (3.8)
11. Glee – FOX : 7.50 millones (3.5) – renovada
12. The Vampire Diaries – CW : 4.91 millones (2.1)
13. Brothers – FOX : 2.80 millones (1.0)
14. Melrose Place – CW : 2.31 millones (1.3)
15. The Beautiful Life – CW : 1.38 milón (0.6) – anulada

Fuente:pizquita.com

First, a quick recap of the new shows I’ve seen so far:

Flash Forward is a maybe for me, but it’s a strong maybe.  I found the pilot intriguing, and it’s full of great actors (loving John Cho and Joseph Fiennes), but segues to commercial breaks that feature an ominous voice telling me to do things like  “pay attention to the kangaroo — it might be important” kind of make me want to kick someone in the shins.  Don’t tell me what to do, you creepy bastard.  If I want to pay attention to the kangaroo, I’LL PAY ATTENTION TO THE KANGAROO.  (And if that’s not a Facebook status update of pure gold, I don’t know what is.)

NCIS: Los Angeles: [THIS PARAGRAPH CONTAINS A SPOILER] I love you, LL Cool J and Linda Hunt.  And okay, you too Chris O’Donnell, if I must.  However, your show is an absolute disaster.  I must have laughed out loud 15 times watching your pilot, and only 2 of those times were because you let LL Cool J tell a joke.  Plus, you know how at the end of the first episode, the bad guy is about to shoot “G” (O’Donnell) in the head, and just as he’s about to pull the trigger, G’s phone goes off,  and so the bad guy is all, “No, no, go ahead.  I’ll wait”?   Really?  I mean, REALLY really?   Also, poor, broken orphan who never had a first name, only a first initial?  And don’t even get me started on the rack of $300 designer jeans paid for with our tax dollars.  Bah.  One more episode and then I’m out.

The Forgotten:  Same song, different verse — it’s actually just Cold Case all over again.  I really liked Slater in this, but everybody else is a total throwaway so far, and the plots are going to have to get WAY, WAY more interesting if this show wants to survive longer than mid-October.  My money’s on one more episode and then the boot.

Eastwick, Mercy:  I didn’t make it through their pilots, I’m afraid.  I’m out, and I bet the networks will be shortly out as well.

Let me know what you guys thought?  I still haven’t seen The Good Wife, but will try to catch that one this week.  So far, in terms of returning shows, Supernatural is still kicking everybody’s ass, by the way.  If you aren’t watching that series and you like smart, funny, clever, creative writing, DUDE.  Is all.

Monday, 9/28

Lie to Me (FOX) — 8pm.  I watched this series last year and mostly enjoyed it, but it needs a lot of work if it’s going to keep me intrigued enough this year to keep going.  I confess the part I like the best is that I feel like I am learning skills I can apply whenever I suspect someone is lying to me.  Frankly, if they could just skip the character drama and turn this show into a TV-based training course in kinesics instead, I think I’d like it a lot better.  Sorry, Tim.  Maybe you can narrate?

Trauma (NBC) — 9pm.  Another show tries to fill the void left by ER.  But you know what, shows?  We don’t really need you to fill a void.  We sort of need you to do something new.  This one is about EMTs and trauma surgeons, and maybe, MAYBE the EMT stuff might be sort of interesting.  We’ll see, sigh.   The cast has a few familiar faces (dashing-Kiwi Cliff Curtis, guy-who-creeps-me-out Jamie Sheridan), but for the most part don’t look terribly inspiring.  Can you tell I’m really struggling to muster up ANY degree of enthusiasm for this one?  Yeah, that.  Go ahead, Trauma, make me eat my words.  DOUBLE-DOG DARE YOU.

Hell’s Kitchen (FOX) — 8pm.  You know what’s really weird?  Watching this show and then watching Gordon Ramsey’s British shows like Kitchen Nightmares and The F Word.   Why do we, as Americans, need to convert that guy into such an incredible jerk in order to make him entertaining and marketable here? I boggle, as does my mind.

Hank (ABC) — 8pm and The Middle (ABC) — 8:30pm.  Whatever.

Private Practice (ABC) — 10pm.  This is still on?  AND EYES GOT CANCELED?  I hate you, ABC.  And yes, I will hold that grudge for all of eternity, thanks for asking.

Til Death (FOX) – 8:30pm.  Watched half of season one of this one, actually — I know, surprise, right?  Yeah, it. . . meh.

Three Rivers (CBS) –  Dammit, CBS, don’t fail me on this one, would you?  Of the three medical shows starting this fall, this is the only one that actually has a chance of being relatively not-that-sucky.  But here’s the problem — this series is about organ transplant doctors.  Remember that OTHER series about organ transplant doctors — Heartland?  The one with Treat Williams?  That show was a veritable croque monsieur of cheese.  This show needs to NOT BE LIKE THAT SHOW.  And that’s really the only advice I can give at this point.  Come on, Alex O’Loughlin, you mad-crazy hunkaroo, SAVE ME.

This time, the blogger takes a look at “The Bachelor” (1999), a remake of “Seven Chances” (1925), but it is hard for an average talkie to compete with any movie that has Buster Keaton starring in it.

Alkuperäinen Seven Chances (1925) ei ole Keatonin huippukauden leffoista paras, mutta Keaton esittää silti mainiosti erästä klassikkohahmoaan, ujon hämmentynyttä nuorukaista. Jimmy Shannon -Keatonin on mentävä naimisiin muutaman tunnin sisällä, jos aikoo saada suuren perinnön. Erinäisten sattumusten kautta morsianehdokkaita kertyy satoja, ja lopussa Jimmy-Keaton juoksee heitä pakoon ja saa samalla niskaansa kivivyöryn, mutta onnistuu lopulta saamaan ajoissa unelmiensa naisen.

Chris O’Donnellin näyttelemässä uudellenfilmatisoinnissa Poikamies pulassa (The Bachelor 1999) Jimmy Shannon ei ole toivottoman ujo vaan sitoutumiskammoinen nuori mies, joka kosintaa yrittäessään tuntee vapauden karkaavan käsistään ja sössii sanavalinnoissaan siinä määrin, että on kadottaa myös tyttöystävänsä Annen (Renée Zellweger).

Tälläkin kertaa kirkkoon nukahtanut Jimmie löytää itsensä tuhannen wannnabe-morsiamen ympäröimänä, ja nämä tahtovat tietää millä kriteereillä hän puolisonsa valitsee. Sitten tietysti seuraa takaa-ajoa, oikean morsiamen löytäminen, julkinen tunnustus, synninpäästö, vihkiminen ja sovinto morsianjoukkojen kanssa.

74 vuotta Keaton-filmatisoinnin jälkeen käytössä on paremmat resurssit, enemmän kameroita, joukko käsikirjoittajia ja paljon puhetta, mutta yksinkertaisen tunnin mittaisen alkuperäistarinan tulkitseminen hauskasti  kahden tunnin mittaisena ei tuota parasta mahdollista tulosta, varsinkaan kun Keatonin käyttämät vauhdikkaan fyysiset gagit ovat näköjään poissa laskuista.

Joissakin kohdin O’Donnellin säpsähtenyt muistuttavat etäisesti Keatonista, ja eräässä kohtauksessa Jimmy-O’Donnell hortoilee pörssissä etäisesti samaan tapaan kuin Buster Keaton esittäessään onnetonta miljonäärityhjäntoimittajaa “Pilkkapölkyssä” (The Saphead 1920). Mutta niistä on pitkä matka sekä hyvään Keaton-kunnianosoitukseen että muuten vaan hyvään elokuvaan.

Jotkut sivuhahmot kuten sankarittaren ällönlemmekkäät vanhemmat ja avioliiton patriarkaalisuutta analysoiva yliopisto-opiskelija (eräs Jimmyn tavoittelemista korvikemorsiamista) ovat huvittavia. Ylimalkaan tämän elokuvan naimisiinraahaavana voimatekijänä eivät ole niinkään naiset, vaan nimenomaan elokuvan miehet koettavat kovasti akkulturoida sitoutumiskammoista Jimmyä. Sanoman vie lopulta parhaiten perille pappi ja leskimies, jonka kuvaus avioliitosta saa nuorukaisen aidosti vihkivireeseen.

Mo 9/28: Chris O’Donnell, Paula Poundstone
Tu 9/29: James Spader, Cobie Smulders, Laura Isobar
We 9/30: Jenna Elfman, Dom Irrera
Th 10/1: Patricia Arquette, Dominic Cooper
Fr 10/2: Tim Gunn, Cathy Ladman, Lynyrd Skynyrd

So now we know part of Callen’s secret. The rest will no doubt come at a slow dribble. Female viewers will love Callen even more than before, and then we had the scars from when he was shot…

NCIS: Los Angeles is not NCIS. But it’s pretty close. Given time we can love these characters (almost) as much as we do Gibbs and co. Personally I’m partial to Agent Hanna, who is not a woman. I have this slight problem with Hanna as a surname, but I’ll get used to it one day. It beats Sam Hanna’s real name of LL Cool J. I mean, how do you even begin to call him in when dinner’s ready?

Linda Hunt as Hetty was good. Maybe every series needs a grumpy, but heart-of-gold type, individual. It was a little disorientating to find they had changed their ‘office’ from the last airing on NCIS in the spring, but at least the changes deal with the loss of Macy.

I quite like Dominic, too. Readers of books are good. But psychologists with guns in their boots? I don’t think so.

The adventure for the first episode was fairly ordinary, but fine for setting the scene. Not spectacular like Yankee White, but you can’t always have the President of the United States at the beck and call of CBS. (Though just think what Obama could do!) And what a relief it must be for them to film California as California, with no need to pretend we’re in Washington.

(Photos © CBS)

NCIS‘ seventh season premiered Tuesday and the series debut of NCIS: Los Angeles followed. It was, beyond a shadow of the doubt, the greatest two hours of television in the history of humanity.

In NCIS, Gibbs, DiNozzo, and McGee (Sean Murray) travel to Africa to rescue Ziva (Cote de Pablo) from the clutches of terrorists. It was a Dinozzo centered episode and it give plenty of airtime to television’s most underrated actor, Michael Weatherly.

The relationship between Dinozzo and Ziva advanced about an inch. There’s is the slowest moving romance in the history of television and it’s awesome. Once they hook up the show is over so they can move as slow as they want.

Gibbs (Mark Harmon) is seeming to grow closer to Director Vance (Rocky Carroll). In fact, one may even say there’s becoming friends.

Land of Punt was disappointed when our girl Jenny Shepard (Lauren Holly) was killed. We had a huge crush on Director Shepard and enjoyed her relationship with Gibbs. However, in a season and an episode Director Vance has become a fascinating character and we appreciate his presence.

The episode was short on Abby (Pauley Perrette). Dr. Mallard (David McCallum) was hardly in it and there was no Palmer (Brian Dietzen).

Bottom line, NCIS is back and it still has it’s energy. We are looking forward to an outstanding season.

As you would imagine, NCIS: Los Angeles has a different vibe and a different dynamics amongst it’s cast.

Immediately, you realized that the show will center around Callen (Chris O’Donnell) with a strong emphasis on Hanna (LL Cool J).

Callen is a lot like Gibbs only instead of losing a family he’s an orphan. And of course Callen is much younger.

Hanna looks like he’ll be brawn of the show and Callen’s glorified sidekick. That’s fine because the characters have great chemistry. Even with that said, Hanna is engaging and very likable. His character appears to have a wealth of experience from his days as a Navy Seal.

The periphery characters need some work but two really stand out. Kensi Blye (Daniela Ruah) is not only interesting but drop dead gorgeous. She lit up the HD screen every time she was on. Beyond her dashing good looks, Blye is an intelligent and capable agent. Needless to say, we’re looking forward to seeing more of her.

The show was nearly stolen by Henrietta ‘Hetty’ Lange (Linda Hunt). Part boss, part operations manager, and part mother Hetty is becomes the focus of every scene she’s in. She’s simply captivating.

The other three characters, Dominic Vaile (Adam Jamal Craig), Eric Beal (Barrett Foa), and ‘Doc’ Getz (Peter Cambor) need some work. Getz especially has us scratching our head. Why does the show need a operational psychologist when utilizing a psychologist is out of character for all the characters? Vaile and Beal might just need more airtime.

It appears that NCIS: Los Angeles will focus on Callen going undercover and conning the bad guys more so than investigating a murder. The spin-off also seems to employ more cutting edge technology than the original–much to the chagrin of McGee.

Another difference is the set. NCIS: Los Angeles has an infinitely more interesting set than the original. It’s almost a character unto itself.

After one episode, NCIS: Los Angeles was very good. We can’t wait until this good show finds it stride.

That’s right kiddies! It is BACK!

Welcome to the Preview Review, wherein I find the unlettered preview pages offered online for a comic (that I really have no intention of buying), and write a review of the issue based entirely on my perceptions of what is going on.

And, what do I have in store for today? Why, nothing less than the majestic wonder that is Cable #16!

(Ooh… ahh…)

Yes, my friends, gather ’round, and let’s take a look at this masterpiece provided to us by writer Duane Swierczynski and artist Paul Gulacy. First up, the cover by Dave Wilkins!

Let’s see… looks like we have a little kid, most likely a girl is my guess… mostly because she seems to have that look of the “big eyed girls” that was prominent in outsider art of the 1960’s.

That’s right, scoffers! I have an art degree and I’m not afraid to use it! Sure, I could have gone for the lazy reference to anime/manga for the size of the eyes, but no! I went all historical! Ha!

Where was I? Oh, yeah, the cover. Anyway, the little girl is standing there, wearing a pair of boots that, based on the size, must come from Guy Gardner’s closet of the late 80’s/early 90’s!

Really? I’m the only one that gets the reference? Fine, here, take a look:

See?

Anyway, the little girl appears to be standing in front of Cable, drawn from Picasso’s Blue Period.

Ka-Zow! I did it again! Another zinger courtesy of my art degree! Ha ha ha! It makes it all worth it – the years of study, the student loans I’m still paying back, the virtual uselessness of the degree in an actual workforce…

(On a blog, no one can see you cry…)

Alright, so, the kid is in front of Cable (I know its Cable, because, a.) the massive gun, b.) the large number of pouches, and c.) I lived through the 1990’s.). Cable is… I’m going to say that Cable is encased in a giant block of ice.

And, given how he’s standing, the cold front must have moved in fast. Maybe one of those “superstorms” we saw Jake Gyllenhaal running from in The Day After Tomorrow. Which means that Cable, despite being a superhero, can’t outrun Jake Gyllenhaal.

(Wow… he’s got some crazy eyes, huh?)

I’m not sure what purpose that knowledge will ever serve, but now you know, and knowing is half the battle. GI JOE!

Given the cover, I can only assume that this comic deals with the kid trying to free Cable from the block of ice… a plot that makes me flashback to the film atrocity known as Batman and Robin, and thus makes going any farther a less than inviting thought.

And, yet, I must! On to the first page!

First panel! Ah… well. Hmm. It seems that the guy with the metal arm… Colossus? No, he has black hair. Oh, wait, white hair! That must be Cable! I see pouches and a gun!

Okay, so Cable is… assaulting a little person in the ruins of a building? That doesn’t seem right. What happened to the little girl from the cover?

What? No, that can’t be the little girl from the cover. That is *clearly* a woman’s head on that wee body, not a little girl. Although, she does appear to be wearing the same outfit at the girl from the cover.

So… confused… already… move… to… next… panel…

Alright, see, I told you! That is NOT a little girl. Maybe it is the little girl’s mother, and they have matching outfits. Oh, and she is ticked because Cable is getting fresh.

But, man, take a look at that head of hair on Cable. That is some nice, thick, well-maintained hair. Even in the midst of a building in ruins and fighting with a little person, Cable remembers the importance of looking good for the odd camera angle.

Next Panel!

Look! Cable and the little person are posing for a boxing match promotional poster! And starting to glow blue? Hmm…

After the poster shoot, it looks like the little person has fought off the advances of Cable with a mighty kick that looks to have crushed his sternum. And, again with the blue glow… why does that look so familiar?

Last panel of the page an — wait a second! I understand it now! I know where I’ve seen that blue glow! Quantum Leap! The little person appears to be leaping! Leaping from life to life! Striving to put right what once went wrong! And hoping each time that the next leap… will be the leap home!

Wow, I didn’t know that this was happening in Cable comics! I LOVED the tv show Quantum Leap! If I had known that it was picked up in the Cable comic, I’d have been there from the start!

Woo hoo! I’m suddenly much more interested in this comic! I wonder where the little person will leap next? Maybe into a police officer in the early 80’s, or a high school freshman of the 1970’s, or maybe a grandmother in the 1990’s…

Let’s turn the page and find out!

Ha ha! Too bad, Cable! The little person Leaper is getting away! No more of a chance for you to try to work your charms on her!

And the next four progressive panels, we see the continued leap. Strange, I never really noticed Sam Beckett in Quantum Leap having such a look of distress on his face when leaping. Still, by that third panel, I can almost hear the Quantum Leap theme song, “Do do, doodoo, do do, doodoo…”

And the leap seems to be almost over, wonder where we will end up! Next!

Hey… wait a second. Why are we back with Cable?!? We were going to leap, following the adventures of the little person bouncing around in time! She got to leap away, and we get stuck with what? A Cable comic? C’mon… how is THAT fair?

Those last two panels on this page are fitting. Yeah, Cable, we are with you. We thought we were going to get a great Quantum Leap story, too… but now… just the sad, pathetic knowledge that the leaping little person is gone, and we are stuck here… alone… with you.

Turn the page. It has to get better, right?

Huzzah wha-? Did I miss where the ground went out from beneath Cable? No, I didn’t. Okay, then we are climbing to… the next panel…

Ah, here we go. Cable was climbing to get to the rooftop of some building… because as a moody character, he’s required to look over the vast decay of the environment and brood? Sure, why not?

You know… that’s a lot of debris on that rooftop. Its like someone actually had to carry it up to the rooftop. I don’t know why they would do that, but that’s what it looks like. And, right there, in the center… is that a tire rim? Why in the world would someone carry a rim up there?

On to the next pan – Augh! Oh, wow… I was not expecting a close-up of Cable’s giant, sweating dinosaur head. Gee willickers, a little warning next time. Let’s just move on… that milky-white eye is creeping me out.

Now it appears as if there is a dust storm on the rooftop. And the silhouette of two large bones. Maybe there is more in the last panel…

Hmm… seems the bones weren’t bones, but hydraulics. Wait, I get it! Rims, hydraulics… this rooftop was the domain of nomadic Lowriders!

You know, coincidentally, all my friends love a lowrider.  They really, really do.

Okay, let’s turn the page.

Alright, now, here we have Cable saluting in front of a wall of junk. He probably thinks it is fitting, since a lot of that junk looks like it could have once been some of the massive guns he carries. Ooh, and his hand is glowing! Maybe he’ll finally get to leap and find that little person!

Oh, and look! A little inset of sand castles. Lovely. Not really sure why it is there, but lovely nonetheless.

Just under that, Cable poses, showing off his gun, pouches, and firm buttocks. His hand is still starting the Quantum Leap. Must be a delayed reaction.

Sliding over to the next panel, another close-up of Cable and his milky-white eye. Sheesh, that’s creepy. But, it seems he’s finally noticed the leap is starting! Almost time to travel through time!

At the bottom of the page, we have… Cable rending his clothes? Huh? Hold on, I know what is going on. The blue glow of the leap is spreading, and Cable thinks he has to strip naked to travel in time like in those Terminator films. Someone should explain to him that Leaping doesn’t really work like that.

Alright, how about that last page? I can’t wait to see Cable assume the identity of a diner waitress at a truckstop in 1978!

Oh, guess I was wrong. Seems that Cable leapt into a black guy in… well, it looks about the same sort of place that Cable was already in. Oh, and what irony! This guy also has a metal arm, but it is on the opposite side that Cable’s normally is.

And, a little inset of debris. Wonder why they focused on tha –

Holy smokes, Cable’s using the debris to tear into that metal arm! Cable! Stop! I know, this wasn’t the most excited leap in time, but trying to force another leap just isn’t the answer!

In the next inset panel, Cable, frustrated, seems to be ripping the metal arm off. That seems extreme.

And, finally, we are presented Cable, in profile, grimly accepting that leaping can’t be forced. There are things that have to be put right before you can leap… a lesson we all learned in the Quantum Leap episode entitled “Double Identity.”

And, if I’m lyin’, I’m dyin’.

(To the other three people on the planet that get that reference, thank you.)

Well, that was quite a little adventure. Sadly, there was NOTHING in this about Cable being encased in ice, which was disappointing. Plus, there at the end, they completely messed up the Quantum Leap stuff, because in that show, Sam only *appeared* to be the person he leapt into. He was actually still himself. So, Cable tearing into that arm with the debris? Yeah, that would have been him tearing into his actual flesh arm. And, that is kinda sick. I can only give this 218 stars out of 18,716 stars. I really think I’d have gone higher if we’d followed the leap of the little person that was escaping Cable.

That’ll do it for now. See you all at the next Preview Review.

*EG, enveloped by a blue light, leaps away!*

At the beginning of each TV season, I like to sample new shows at least once. Last night, I did a marathon, watching NCIS: Los Angeles, Modern Family, Cougar Town, Glee and half of Eastwick. Since my eyes have way exceeded their daily radiation allotment, I’m going to keep this short and just go with quick impressions of each show.

Photo: Sonja Flemming/CBS

NCIS: Los Angeles. Chris O’Donnell is so wrong for this role of tough, military-trained leader guy. He’s as edgy as soup; his low-energy line readings and pauses slow down the show’s pacing, which broadcasts every plot development from a mile away. It makes no sense that O’Donnell’s character doesn’t know what his first name is (he only has the initial “G”). If he’s an orphan like it’s implied, at some point while he was going through the system, someone would’ve given him a name, if for no other reason than proper record keeping. Everyone else in the pilot is completely forgettable, except for maybe Barrett Foa, whose tech expert is quirky without being annoying, and Linda Hunt, whose character looks exactly like the costume designer Edna from The Incredibles.  Even LL Cool J couldn’t make this show like his name. Nerd verdict: NCIS=Not Cool or Interesting Show.

Photo: Bob D'Amico/ABC

Modern Family. I was a little wary of all the hype surrounding this show since I was underwhelmed by CBS’s Julianna Margulies-starrer The Good Wife, which also had advance rave reviews. But Family got in a few good jokes and most of the characters are likable. My favorites are the gay men who just adopted the cutest Vietnamese baby and named her Lily. A family member asks, “Wouldn’t that be hard for her to say?” I’m Vietnamese, can pronounce all my “L”s properly and still found that hilarious. Nerd verdict: A Family I’m happy to see.

Courtesy ABC

Cougar Town. I think Courteney Cox can be really goofy and she does good, brave work here. Who doesn’t like a beautiful woman who can make fun of herself? The pilot was trying too hard to be witty, though. We get that Jules, Cox’s character, is a little desperate but the show shouldn’t come off that way, too. Dan Byrd (Aliens in America), as Jules’s son, does have a sane, grounding presence and the show has potential if everyone would just relax. Nerd verdict: I’d visit this Town again if residents quiet down a bit.

Eastwick. I bailed halfway through so my remarks only apply to the first 30 minutes. The leads, Rebecca Romjin, Lindsay Price and Jaime Ray Newman, lack bewitching powers and the Jack Nicholson role is filled by an actor looking like Chris Noth-lite speaking in affected soap-opera tones. Nerd verdict: No magic here.

Courtesy Fox

Glee. This show has been on for a couple weeks and its pilot aired back in May but it’s still a new series. If you’re not watching it yet, you’ve got to start. Every week, it deftly mixes humor with pathos, features Jane Lynch as MVP, and includes at least one musical number. I don’t even like musicals but find myself looking forward every week to the showcase piece. This week, it was a high-school football team taking a timeout during a game to dance on the field to Beyonce’s “Single Ladies,” complete with the infamous moves. As entertaining as this was, though, the high point for me was the scene where Kurt (Chris Colfer) came out to his father (Mike O’Malley). Both actors handled the scene with the perfect amount of heart and it was a beautiful thing to watch. Nerd verdict: Glee, indeed.

What new shows have you seen? Which gets a season pass on the DVR and which will you just pass on?