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Blogs about: Circling Birds

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so here i am

the edges wrote 10 months ago: i’m writing so woohoo so great so well done i… i don’t have anything i want to tal … more →

Tags: Stream of Consciousness, Being Good, being good to be around, being in control, Body, Dark things, e*a and me, scareded

i have no idea whether this is apprpriate or not

the edges wrote 11 months ago: but m*riads told me once that the only (best?) defense they had was to tell and tell and tell.  and … more →

Tags: Stream of Consciousness, e*a and me, Self-Hating, feeling crazy, scareded, Body, Nobody loves me, needing people, talking about things we don't want to talk about

this is not an entry i want to write

the edges wrote 11 months ago: okay. let’s start there. this is not an entry i want to write. i am writing it, but i don … more →

Tags: Stream of Consciousness, Alters, Being Good, Dysfunctionality, taking care of people, the borderlines, being clingy/needy, mom, sex-being a bottom

(...)

the edges wrote 11 months ago: … more →

Tags: Update, pcture/graphic, Being Good, being hard on ourselves, feeling crazy, scareded, Nobody loves me, being in control, being an abuser

someone inside says "i cried hysterically"

the edges wrote 11 months ago: like they are narrating. who knows. i know we are triggered. i know we are bad. i know we are a bad … more →

Tags: Stream of Consciousness, being clingy/needy, Being Good, Body, feeling crazy, mom, Nobody loves me, Programming, scareded

plus i'm smoking like a chimney

the edges wrote 11 months ago: staying up late but not often able to sleep in. um plus we’ve lost perspective says someone. i … more →

Tags: Stream of Consciousness, trying to figure something out, Update, Being Good, Dysfunctionality, associating, Body, inter-system communication, insomnia

i would just like to say, for the record,

the edges wrote 11 months ago: that clearly i am treating m*riad like my mother whom i need to save or they’ll leave me. i ju … more →

Tags: Stream of Consciousness, Update, Being Bad, being in control, mom, needing people, Nobody loves me, Programming, protective/possessive

who am i kidding?

the edges wrote 11 months ago: if m*riad is running away, then i picked them because they would be running away.  and would probabl … more →

Tags: Stream of Consciousness, Being a girl, Being Bad, being clingy/needy, Being Good, being good enough, being in control, being multiple, Body

some of us think it is hilarious that anyone thinks we would judge a*ron

the edges wrote 11 months ago: (laughs)  why?  cuz his “bad” parts have been detected and done “tangibly wrong … more →

Tags: Stream of Consciousness, being an abuser, Being Bad, Body, Dark things, scareded

someone almost cried as we played the end of this for kathy yesterday

the edges wrote 11 months ago: it’s our secret favorite i think. but i am pretty sure it is in no waay one of our best.  anyw … more →

Tags: Stream of Consciousness, Audio, Music, mom, feeling crazy, Dream Places, Dreams, Body

we are pretty sure m*riad thinks we are too much work

the edges wrote 11 months ago: it’s too much work to make our pleasers feel useful, it’s too much work to process, it … more →

Tags: Stream of Consciousness, Update, being clingy/needy, feeling crazy, scareded, Context, Dreams, Body, being good to be around

i am sad and small and scared

the edges wrote 11 months ago: i know i am a bad girl.  i know that for sure.  i know i am bad very bad and scared.  i know things … more →

Tags: Stream of Consciousness, trying to figure something out, Being Good, the borderlines, being clingy/needy, mom, smoking, being hard on ourselves, self-mocking

okay, this is a seriously embarassing entry, but i'm going to write it anyway

the edges wrote 11 months ago: so m*tt was here (already you can tell this is a teenager or preteen) and we just, wow this is serio … more →

Tags: Rant, talking about things we don't want to talk about, the borderlines, being clingy/needy, feeling crazy, scareded, Littles, Being a girl, being good to be around

it is so cold in the apartment

the edges wrote 11 months ago: help help i’m scared something is going on e*a wrote emails she feels our pain alot and she un … more →

Tags: Stream of Consciousness, Being Good, e*a and me, the borderlines, being hard on ourselves, Self-Hating, feeling crazy, scareded, Body

it's because she is still seeing mom

the edges wrote 11 months ago: she is still seeing her.  she is the favorite.  she is the channel for her energy.  i am picking it … more →

Tags: Stream of Consciousness, trying to figure something out, keeping a record, talking about things we don't want to talk about, Being Good, mom, royal/fairy taleish imagery, extensive reppetition, Self-harm

so something wierd happened

the edges wrote 1 year ago: or actually it wasn’t wierd, but that was wierd because it shouldn’t be that common.  or … more →

Tags: Stream of Consciousness, being hard on ourselves, scareded, Not Eating, being good to be around, being an abuser, being good enough, Switching

okay so m*riad made an interesting point

the edges wrote 1 year ago: cuz like we realized we was maybe triggered or somethinand wes ated a candy and 2 potato chips tonig … more →

Tags: Stream of Consciousness, trying to figure something out, keeping a record, smoking, sex-being a bottom, being hard on ourselves, feeling crazy, scareded, Body

also, it has been really wierd to be people who don't want to smoke

the edges wrote 1 year ago: like they don’t want to feel more out of control.  it’s odd.  glad to have some of the s … more →

Tags: Stream of Consciousness, trying to figure something out, Update, Being Good, associating, being good to be around, being in control, Being Bad

one of the chants we here sometimes

the edges wrote 1 year ago: “[some name] is suicidal, scared, and alone” we’ve been hearing the narrator more, … more →

Tags: Update, Alters, being clingy/needy, Self-Hating, feeling crazy, Dark things, chants


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