Participating in high-impact sports may help boost bone mineral density in older persons, according to a new study of male and female athletes.

The findings stem from a study of athletes aged 50 to 93 who took part in the 2005 National Senior Games, including 560 who competed in high-impact sports like basketball, road racing, track and field, and volleyball.

Ultrasound scans found those who participated in high-impact sports had better bone mineral density than people who participated in low-impact sports.

“Our study represents the largest sample of bone mineral density data in mature athletes to date,” said Dr. Vonda Wright of the University of Pittsburg Medical Center. “My colleagues and I were surprised to see that active adult participation in the high-impact sports had such a positive influence on bone health, even in the oldest athletes.”

A HealthDay report notes that osteoarthritis and other factors will keep some people from taking part in high-impact sports.

“With a multi-part approach and the appropriate use of high-impact exercises, individuals may be able to make greater strides against bone loss than the current treatment strategies imply,” Wright said.

Clearly, able-bodied senior citizens participating in these higher-impact activities can produce great results; the only thing lacking may be the motivation to do so. People who will give them that extra push can be found at companies like Home Instead Senior Care. Home Instead hires outgoing and energetic individuals who will not only present the best home care to our clients, but promote healthy living and will motivate your loved ones to get back in the game.
Home Instead Senior Care will provide outstanding caregivers to help your loved one with personal care, incidental travel, companionship, medication reminders, light housekeeping, and even meal preparation. To learn more, call 248-203-2273 or visit www.homeinstead.com. Home Instead Senior Care is the world’s trusted source of in-home non-commercial personal care and companionship for seniors. Each franchise is independently owned and operated. And remember, to us, it’s personal.

Participating in high-impact sports may help boost bone mineral density in older persons, according to a new study of male and female athletes.

The findings stem from a study of athletes aged 50 to 93 who took part in the 2005 National Senior Games, including 560 who competed in high-impact sports like basketball, road racing, track and field, and volleyball.

Ultrasound scans found those who participated in high-impact sports had better bone mineral density than people who participated in low-impact sports.

“Our study represents the largest sample of bone mineral density data in mature athletes to date,” said Dr. Vonda Wright of the University of Pittsburg Medical Center. “My colleagues and I were surprised to see that active adult participation in the high-impact sports had such a positive influence on bone health, even in the oldest athletes.”

A HealthDay report notes that osteoarthritis and other factors will keep some people from taking part in high-impact sports.

“With a multi-part approach and the appropriate use of high-impact exercises, individuals may be able to make greater strides against bone loss than the current treatment strategies imply,” Wright said.

Clearly, able-bodied senior citizens participating in these higher-impact activities can produce great results; the only thing lacking may be the motivation to do so. People who will give them that extra push can be found at companies like Home Instead Senior Care. Home Instead hires outgoing and energetic individuals who will not only present the best home care to our clients, but promote healthy living and will motivate your loved ones to get back in the game.
Home Instead Senior Care will provide outstanding caregivers to help your loved one with personal care, incidental travel, companionship, medication reminders, light housekeeping, and even meal preparation. To learn more, call 248-203-2273 or visit www.homeinstead.com. Home Instead Senior Care is the world’s trusted source of in-home non-commercial personal care and companionship for seniors. Each franchise is independently owned and operated. And remember, to us, it’s personal.

Seniors who eat fruits and vegetables and who have good cognitive function are much less likely to die from heart disease than those who have poorer cognitive function and eat fewer fruits and vegetables, according to a new study.

Researchers at the Drexel University School of Public Health in Philadelphia analyzed diet and cognitive data on 4,879 people age 70 and older who took part in the U.S. Longitudinal Study on Aging. Participants were followed for an average of seven years.

According to a HealthDay report, the analysis found that:

• Those who ate three or more servings of vegetables daily had a 30 percent lower risk for dying from heart disease and a 15 percent lower risk for dying from any cause during the follow-up period than those who ate fewer servings of vegetables.

• There was a significant association between higher consumption of fruits and vegetables and decreased prevalence of cognitive impairment.

• People who scored high on cognitive function tests were less likely to die from heart disease or any other cause during the follow-up than were those with low scores.

Having a healthy heart is important when it comes to old age. That is why Home Instead Senior Care promotes this healthy heart through our caregivers. Our caregivers promote positive cognitive function, and they cook healthy meals which will often include fruits and vegetables. Mom and dad need all the help they can get; if you’re finding it difficult to take care of your loved ones and are looking for someone who will go that extra mile, then give Home Instead a call.

Home Instead Senior Care will provide outstanding caregivers to help your loved one with personal care, incidental travel, companionship, medication reminders, light housekeeping, and even meal preparation. To learn more, call 248-203-2273 or visit www.homeinstead.com. Home Instead Senior Care is the world’s trusted source of in-home non-commercial personal care and companionship for seniors. Each franchise is independently owned and operated. And remember, to us, it’s personal.

Seniors who eat fruits and vegetables and who have good cognitive function are much less likely to die from heart disease than those who have poorer cognitive function and eat fewer fruits and vegetables, according to a new study.

Researchers at the Drexel University School of Public Health in Philadelphia analyzed diet and cognitive data on 4,879 people age 70 and older who took part in the U.S. Longitudinal Study on Aging. Participants were followed for an average of seven years.

According to a HealthDay report, the analysis found that:

• Those who ate three or more servings of vegetables daily had a 30 percent lower risk for dying from heart disease and a 15 percent lower risk for dying from any cause during the follow-up period than those who ate fewer servings of vegetables.

• There was a significant association between higher consumption of fruits and vegetables and decreased prevalence of cognitive impairment.

• People who scored high on cognitive function tests were less likely to die from heart disease or any other cause during the follow-up than were those with low scores.

Having a healthy heart is important when it comes to old age. That is why Home Instead Senior Care promotes this healthy heart through our caregivers. Our caregivers promote positive cognitive function, and they cook healthy meals which will often include fruits and vegetables. Mom and dad need all the help they can get; if you’re finding it difficult to take care of your loved ones and are looking for someone who will go that extra mile, then give Home Instead a call.

Home Instead Senior Care will provide outstanding caregivers to help your loved one with personal care, incidental travel, companionship, medication reminders, light housekeeping, and even meal preparation. To learn more, call 248-203-2273 or visit www.homeinstead.com. Home Instead Senior Care is the world’s trusted source of in-home non-commercial personal care and companionship for seniors. Each franchise is independently owned and operated. And remember, to us, it’s personal.

Seniors who neglect themselves, risking their own health and safety, tend to be individuals with limited social networks and little social engagement, according to a study by Rush University Medical Center.

“We need to better understand elder self-neglect – who is at risk and why – so that we can find solutions and establish appropriate policies,” said Dr. Xinqi Dong, the study’s lead author.  “This is particularly important because reports of self-neglect to social service agencies are rising.

“Moreover, as our aging population is rapidly increasing in size, elder self-neglect will likely become an even more pervasive public health issue.”

The study was based on records drawn from the Chicago Health and Aging Project, a study of 9,056 individuals 65 years of age and older who live in Chicago’s South Side. Over the 12-year course of the study, 20 percent of these seniors were reported to the Chicago Department of Aging because of concern about suspected self-neglect.

Elder self-neglect generally manifests itself as “a refusal or failure by the person to provide himself/herself with adequate food, water, clothing, shelter, personal hygiene, medication and safety precautions.”

Twice as many women as men and more than seven times the number of African Americans as whites were reported for self-neglect. Those reported, compared with those not reported, tended to be over the age of 80 and have a lower socioeconomic status. The individuals also tended to have nutritional deficiencies, medical conditions and cognitive, physical and psychological deficits.

However, independent of all these factors, lower levels of social well-being – specifically, limited social networks and little social engagement – were major risk factors for self-neglect.

The study has important implications for health and social service professionals, Dong said.

“Professionals who work with the elderly need to be mindful not just of their patients’ health profile, but also of their social well-being, a factor that may put them at risk of self-neglect,” Dong said.  “With social services being cut, and community and city resources lacking to help seniors, the problems of isolation can only grow worse.”

Lack of social engagement and staying networked with others in this world can bring on some of the worst feelings a person can have. Home Instead Senior Care has only the friendliest, talkative, and socially engaging CAREGivers for our clients. If you are finding your elderly loved one feeling less socially engaged or lonely, Home Instead may be the answer. Our CAREGivers make great companions, and can allow for loved ones to feel rejuvenated with social interaction, reducing the chance of self-neglect.
Home Instead Senior Care will provide outstanding caregivers to help your loved one with personal care, incidental travel, companionship, medication reminders, light housekeeping, and even meal preparation. To learn more, call 248-203-2273 or visit www.homeinstead.com. Home Instead Senior Care is the world’s trusted source of in-home non-commercial personal care and companionship for seniors. Each franchise is independently owned and operated. And remember, to us, it’s personal.

Seniors who neglect themselves, risking their own health and safety, tend to be individuals with limited social networks and little social engagement, according to a study by Rush University Medical Center.

“We need to better understand elder self-neglect – who is at risk and why – so that we can find solutions and establish appropriate policies,” said Dr. Xinqi Dong, the study’s lead author.  “This is particularly important because reports of self-neglect to social service agencies are rising.

“Moreover, as our aging population is rapidly increasing in size, elder self-neglect will likely become an even more pervasive public health issue.”

The study was based on records drawn from the Chicago Health and Aging Project, a study of 9,056 individuals 65 years of age and older who live in Chicago’s South Side. Over the 12-year course of the study, 20 percent of these seniors were reported to the Chicago Department of Aging because of concern about suspected self-neglect.

Elder self-neglect generally manifests itself as “a refusal or failure by the person to provide himself/herself with adequate food, water, clothing, shelter, personal hygiene, medication and safety precautions.”

Twice as many women as men and more than seven times the number of African Americans as whites were reported for self-neglect. Those reported, compared with those not reported, tended to be over the age of 80 and have a lower socioeconomic status. The individuals also tended to have nutritional deficiencies, medical conditions and cognitive, physical and psychological deficits.

However, independent of all these factors, lower levels of social well-being – specifically, limited social networks and little social engagement – were major risk factors for self-neglect.

The study has important implications for health and social service professionals, Dong said.

“Professionals who work with the elderly need to be mindful not just of their patients’ health profile, but also of their social well-being, a factor that may put them at risk of self-neglect,” Dong said.  “With social services being cut, and community and city resources lacking to help seniors, the problems of isolation can only grow worse.”

Lack of social engagement and staying networked with others in this world can bring on some of the worst feelings a person can have. Home Instead Senior Care has only the friendliest, talkative, and socially engaging CAREGivers for our clients. If you are finding your elderly loved one feeling less socially engaged or lonely, Home Instead may be the answer. Our CAREGivers make great companions, and can allow for loved ones to feel rejuvenated with social interaction, reducing the chance of self-neglect.
Home Instead Senior Care will provide outstanding caregivers to help your loved one with personal care, incidental travel, companionship, medication reminders, light housekeeping, and even meal preparation. To learn more, call 248-203-2273 or visit www.homeinstead.com. Home Instead Senior Care is the world’s trusted source of in-home non-commercial personal care and companionship for seniors. Each franchise is independently owned and operated. And remember, to us, it’s personal.

Apropos of what we’ll be discussing for much of next week, this episode of PBS’ Nature series discusses the relationship between humans and our classic domesticated pets – cats and dogs. Through expert interviews, a visit to a Humane Society shelter, and owner-bios reminiscent of the famous couple scenes from When Harry Met Sally, the show seeks to explain – or at least explore – the bonds between pets and their humans.

It’s easy to get indignant about humans domestication of certain animals – we’re asserting our dominance! we’re pretending we rule the globe! we’re stripping them of their natural wild natures! – it’s also important to remember that we evolved alongside our domesticated animals, both pet and pastoral, and through this coevolution we all have become different creatures. Marc Bekoff, a former Guggenheim fellow and Professor Emeritus of Ecology and Evolutionary Biology at UC Boulder who is interviewed extensively in the episode, explains that these bonds of coevolution are strengthened by the presence of mirror neurons in both humans and common pets – that is, dogs and cats. Mirror neurons are what enable us to feel the emotions of another creature, be they of our species or another. As Bekoff puts it, they are “the neural basis for empathy…[required] for the formulation and maintenance of social bonds.” In other words, that prize human emotion – the one that leads to self-awareness, to social structure, to emotional relationships – is, in fact, not human at all.

Now, I’m not saying we shouldn’t point out the often elitist – or at least excessively moral – human paradigm that we, as a species, tend to impose on the rest of the planet’s animals. And it’s important to note that these animals are not human – they are close to us, but they are not, and never will be the same as us. As one of the dog owners interviewed in the opening sequence says, “they’re another tribe…and what I really love about dogs and cats is that they’re not like us.”

So watch the documentary. Though be warned, it might bring you to tears –I know it did me – the kind of hot, messy, gut-wrenching tears that we seem to save for the inevitable goodbyes to our pets.

New research published on BMJ.com finds that older people who walk slowly are more likely to die from cardiovascular disease than those who walk faster.

The authors say the findings underscore the essential role of fitness in preserving life and function in older age.

“These findings show that assessment of motor performances in older people with simple measures such as walking speed can be performed easily and that the role of fitness in preserving life and function in older age is important,” the report notes.

A team of researchers from France studied the relationship between low walking speed and the risk of death in older people. Their findings are based on the five-year monitoring of 3,208 men and women aged 65 to 85.

Participants in the lowest third of walking speed at the start of the study had a 44 percent increased risk of death compared to those in the upper third. And, those in the lowest third of walking speed have a three times increased risk of cardiovascular death than those who walked faster.

For more information, see the report on bmj.com.

As this study clearly shows, exercise can help you throughout your lifetime. Even when you’ve hit that age that it does not seem to help anymore, every bit of cardiovascular activity you perform keeps you healthier. Loved ones who are still able to walk but are still stuck in this mindset will be excited to hear these new findings. But you may not have time to accompany mom or dad on even short walks; a companion caregiver from Home Instead Senior Care is here for your loved one.
Home Instead Senior Care will provide outstanding caregivers to help your loved one with personal care, incidental travel, companionship, medication reminders, light housekeeping, and even meal preparation. To learn more, call 248-203-2273 or visit www.homeinstead.com. Home Instead Senior Care is the world’s trusted source of in-home non-commercial personal care and companionship for seniors. Each franchise is independently owned and operated. And remember, to us, it’s personal.

New research published on BMJ.com finds that older people who walk slowly are more likely to die from cardiovascular disease than those who walk faster.

The authors say the findings underscore the essential role of fitness in preserving life and function in older age.

“These findings show that assessment of motor performances in older people with simple measures such as walking speed can be performed easily and that the role of fitness in preserving life and function in older age is important,” the report notes.

A team of researchers from France studied the relationship between low walking speed and the risk of death in older people. Their findings are based on the five-year monitoring of 3,208 men and women aged 65 to 85.

Participants in the lowest third of walking speed at the start of the study had a 44 percent increased risk of death compared to those in the upper third. And, those in the lowest third of walking speed have a three times increased risk of cardiovascular death than those who walked faster.

For more information, see the report on bmj.com.

As this study clearly shows, exercise can help you throughout your lifetime. Even when you’ve hit that age that it does not seem to help anymore, every bit of cardiovascular activity you perform keeps you healthier. Loved ones who are still able to walk but are still stuck in this mindset will be excited to hear these new findings. But you may not have time to accompany mom or dad on even short walks; a companion caregiver from Home Instead Senior Care is here for your loved one.
Home Instead Senior Care will provide outstanding caregivers to help your loved one with personal care, incidental travel, companionship, medication reminders, light housekeeping, and even meal preparation. To learn more, call 248-203-2273 or visit www.homeinstead.com. Home Instead Senior Care is the world’s trusted source of in-home non-commercial personal care and companionship for seniors. Each franchise is independently owned and operated. And remember, to us, it’s personal.

It’s a go and you’re hereby invited — your chance to meet the Author (e.g. me) of this talked-about book on the 7 phases of Coupling …  See why readers say “It’s inspiring, entertaining — a fun read!” and call it “a New Age Guide” to love & relationships.

In Chicago, Friday, Dec. 4, 6 to 9 p.m. at The Spot, 4437 N. Broadway.  Special Prices and Prizes for this event:  Bring in a copy of ‘C’ for an autograph — or get one on-the-spot — and  you’ll be entered in a drawing for TWO FREE TICKETS to The Flaming Dames “Naughtier and Nicer” Holiday show, opening Dec. 4 at The Spot.  (Note: optional prizes for “Dames” cast & crew if they win.)  Discounts on drinks for all Book Signing attendees.

In Arlington Heights, Saturday, Dec. 5, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. at Adam and Eve Salon & Spa, downtown at 7 E. Minor Street.  Special Prices and Prizes for this event also: Bring in a copy (or get a copy of ‘C’ here) and you could win a FREE MANICURE with PARAFFIN TREATMENT — a combo (like “Dames” tickets) that’s worth more than the price of a book!

The Spot and Adam and Eve aren’t your typical Book Signing venues.  But then, ‘C’ isn’t your typical book!  In city or suburb, I hope you’ll accept my invitation to visit, ask questions — and have a fun time!

<RES>

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE                                                Contact: Bert Copple

Telephone: 248-203-2273

Be a Santa to a Senior Holiday Gift Giveaway

Again Brings Cheer to Area Older Adults

The popular campaign that over the last five years delivered more than 12,000 gifts to local needy seniors is being planned again this holiday season.  Area retailers, along with agencies that serve older adults, have partnered with a local senior-care service to make sure that isolated seniors receive gifts and companionship through the Be a Santa to a Senior program.

The area office of Home Instead Senior Care, the world’s largest provider of non-medical home care and companionship for older adults, has joined several aging networks and senior centers in cooperation with regional National City banks, ACO Hardware locations, and the Dignity Memorial Group to provide presents to seniors who otherwise might not receive a gift this holiday season.

Throughout North America, this is the sixth year of the program where last year more than 28,000 volunteers distributed gifts to deserving seniors.  In the past five years since introducing this Be a Santa to a Senior program, Home Instead Senior Care has helped provide more than one million gifts to 700,000 seniors in North America.

“Be a Santa to a Senior is a great way to give back to the older adults in the community during the hectic holiday season when many are forgotten,” said Tina Rowley, owner of the Home Instead Senior Care office serving Birmingham, MI.   “The holiday is often considered a time for children, but seniors – especially those who are isolated and lonely – need to be remembered as well.  Be a Santa to a Senior also is designed to help stimulate human contact and social interaction for older adults who are unlikely to have guests during the holidays.”

Here’s how the program, which runs from Nov. 16 through Dec. 12 works:  Prior to the holiday season, the participating local non-profit organizations will identify needy and isolated seniors in the community and provide those names to Home Instead Senior Care for this community service program.  Christmas trees, which will go up in participating National City banks, ACO Hardware stores, and other retailers, will feature ornaments with the first names of the seniors and their respective gift requests.

Holiday shoppers can pick up an ornament, buy items on the list and return them unwrapped to the store, along with the ornament attached.  Home Instead Senior Care then enlists the volunteer help of its staff, senior-care business associates, non-profit workers and others to collect, wrap and distribute the gifts to these seniors.  A citywide gift-wrapping day, when hundreds of the presents will be wrapped, will be held on Tuesday, December 15, 2009 at the Troy Community Center.

Martha, 82, is one area senior who will benefit this year from Be a Santa to a Senior.  She lives below the poverty level, has no family in the area, and would normally receive no gifts or visitors at Christmas.  This year she’s asking for a new towel set, a modest but much-needed request, and sugar-free candy due to her being a diabetic.

“Be a Santa to a Senior is a way to show our gratitude to those older adults who have contributed so much to our community,” Bert Copple, the franchise’s general manager said.  “We hope to reach out to many with this gesture of holiday cheer and goodwill.”

If you or someone you know is interested in volunteering to help on the regional gift-wrapping day, contact Mary Sue Sarzynski at 248-203-2273.  Businesses are encouraged to contact the local Home Instead Senior Care office about adopting groups of seniors.  For tree locations in your area, or for more information about the program, log on to www.beasantatoasenior.com.

* * *

Editor’s Note:  For more information about Be a Santa to a Senior, or to arrange photos of the gift-wrapping day, contact Bert Copple at 248-203-2273.

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE                                                Contact: Bert Copple

Telephone: 248-203-2273

Be a Santa to a Senior Holiday Gift Giveaway

Again Brings Cheer to Area Older Adults

The popular campaign that over the last five years delivered more than 12,000 gifts to local needy seniors is being planned again this holiday season.  Area retailers, along with agencies that serve older adults, have partnered with a local senior-care service to make sure that isolated seniors receive gifts and companionship through the Be a Santa to a Senior program.

The area office of Home Instead Senior Care, the world’s largest provider of non-medical home care and companionship for older adults, has joined several aging networks and senior centers in cooperation with regional National City banks, ACO Hardware locations, and the Dignity Memorial Group to provide presents to seniors who otherwise might not receive a gift this holiday season.

Throughout North America, this is the sixth year of the program where last year more than 28,000 volunteers distributed gifts to deserving seniors.  In the past five years since introducing this Be a Santa to a Senior program, Home Instead Senior Care has helped provide more than one million gifts to 700,000 seniors in North America.

“Be a Santa to a Senior is a great way to give back to the older adults in the community during the hectic holiday season when many are forgotten,” said Tina Rowley, owner of the Home Instead Senior Care office serving Birmingham, MI.   “The holiday is often considered a time for children, but seniors – especially those who are isolated and lonely – need to be remembered as well.  Be a Santa to a Senior also is designed to help stimulate human contact and social interaction for older adults who are unlikely to have guests during the holidays.”

Here’s how the program, which runs from Nov. 16 through Dec. 12 works:  Prior to the holiday season, the participating local non-profit organizations will identify needy and isolated seniors in the community and provide those names to Home Instead Senior Care for this community service program.  Christmas trees, which will go up in participating National City banks, ACO Hardware stores, and other retailers, will feature ornaments with the first names of the seniors and their respective gift requests.

Holiday shoppers can pick up an ornament, buy items on the list and return them unwrapped to the store, along with the ornament attached.  Home Instead Senior Care then enlists the volunteer help of its staff, senior-care business associates, non-profit workers and others to collect, wrap and distribute the gifts to these seniors.  A citywide gift-wrapping day, when hundreds of the presents will be wrapped, will be held on Tuesday, December 15, 2009 at the Troy Community Center.

Martha, 82, is one area senior who will benefit this year from Be a Santa to a Senior.  She lives below the poverty level, has no family in the area, and would normally receive no gifts or visitors at Christmas.  This year she’s asking for a new towel set, a modest but much-needed request, and sugar-free candy due to her being a diabetic.

“Be a Santa to a Senior is a way to show our gratitude to those older adults who have contributed so much to our community,” Bert Copple, the franchise’s general manager said.  “We hope to reach out to many with this gesture of holiday cheer and goodwill.”

If you or someone you know is interested in volunteering to help on the regional gift-wrapping day, contact Mary Sue Sarzynski at 248-203-2273.  Businesses are encouraged to contact the local Home Instead Senior Care office about adopting groups of seniors.  For tree locations in your area, or for more information about the program, log on to www.beasantatoasenior.com.

* * *

Editor’s Note:  For more information about Be a Santa to a Senior, or to arrange photos of the gift-wrapping day, contact Bert Copple at 248-203-2273.

All the places I ve been but never seen
The man, the being , the soul unseen
The cheers & crowds
The plains and the desolate scene
The peers who scream they are proud to be friends
Oblivious to the fact that they didnt make it past the fence
The shell that shelters this vulnerable seed
Born to drought but free to feed
Longing savannah and fearing the blue
The ultimate melancholy like Haruhi Suzumiya
And after so many personifications who really becomes you ?

Written by: Heath Muchena

© HTMM ,2009 : Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given, and with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Brushstokes

Lead me into temptation –
and let there be no boundaries to your whisper
as I caress the longing of my inhibition.
It is not enough to love you that I embrace this desire
for my heart is swollen with aspiration.
Might I not be able to hold you within my arms
then I shall hold you in my
- Dreams.

© Charles Coakley Simpson 2009

“Bittersweet”

Anticipation tingles in the tips of my toes
that tap nervous circles on the floor —
waiting, waiting, all day I’ve been waiting
for his arrival and even now as pen spreads ink
across the page, he himself waits
many thousands of feet above the ground
sliding through the darkness in silver sheath

and the dishes are neglected, the boxes yet unpacked
as the clock whiles away the minutes beneath my anxious gaze
together we’re beginning a companionship across miles, years
and these infinite minutes will seem but moments soon

yet somewhere whispering in the back of my mind,
stay, stay, don’t yet go
the mountains stretch ever into the sky
the canola fields lie fallow and dream of next year’s saffron adornments
and friends here reluctantly wave goodbye
the deep blue of the lake will fade into the horizon in the rearview mirror

how often will I long to return?

—

Not a very good poem… I will probably come back in the near(ish) future and tear this thing apart. Suggestions are welcome!

Sybilia

Such is the study in your eyes –
That I am caught between a dream and a desire.
Have I waited too long to embrace you,
even though every moment I ever wanted was to be with you.
Yet as my heart trembles in want of your whisper
you have made it a better place
- To be.

© Charles Coakley Simpson 2009

When I broke up with my last boyfriend I was ecstatic to have my personal time back. It had been a long time since I’d had my own routine and I couldn’t wait to do what I wanted to do, when I wanted to do it. I had grand plans of daily visits to the gym, cooking my weird healthy meals and eating them on the couch while watching marathons of Say Yes To The Dress.

I gained ten pounds during that relationship and while he didn’t care – he loved seeing me in the buff despite the extra junk in my trunk – I was ready to take back the control of my life, shed the extra weight, and hit the single scene with my svelte new frame.

Only the reality was so, so different.

Not only is the single scene rather sad and over-saturated with douche bags, but being single is actually making me fatter!

There is something to be said about having someone around, and not just for the comfort and companionship that comes with a boyfriend. Passing the time with someone else keeps your mind occupied so you’re talking and cuddling and giggling instead of mentally surveying what’s in your fridge. And, not that I care about eating in front of a boy (trust me – I ate a burger and fries in front of some models once), but having anyone around forces me to check myself before I start grazing through the cupboards and housing anything I can get my hands on. Now that I’m alone I’m to my own devices, and apparently those devices involve dipping everything into peanut butter, whether I’m hungry or not.

And forget the gym. Since I don’t have anyone to look good for, I often give in to that fat little devil sitting on my shoulder and trade in Spinning time for catching-up-on-my-DVR time. I keep telling myself I’ll go tomorrow; I have so much free time, why wouldn’t I go? But then I don’t go. I put on sweats, think of things to melt cheese on and retire to the couch for the rest of the night.

The worst culprit, though, is the emotional eating that comes with dating. There is rarely an emotional roller coaster when you’re in a serious relationship. You know how he feels about you, so you’re comfortable and happy. But when you’re single, the emotional ups and downs come daily. You like someone who doesn’t like you back, you see all your friends who are blissfully happy with their own boyfriends, you spend long nights alone and you convince yourself you’re going to be single forever…

And what does that all lead to? Comfort in the form of something creamy, cold and served in a gallon tub. Which you keep eating because there is no one around to stop you. And which you don’t work off because you’re too lazy to get to the gym.

Sigh. I’m stuck in a single rut and I can’t get out. Probably because I’ve gotten too fat to fit through the door. I need motivation. I need self control. I need a padlock on my refrigerator.

I need a… boyfriend?

Rock Star Riley

OK, I asked for your favorite Halloween pics and all I got was one…but what a great one!  This is my new buddy Riley and, as you can see for yourself, he really rocks.  So c’mon everybody, let’s send in those photos already… and not just Halloween shots… get your BF to email any favorite photo of you.  WordPress is great, but it doesn’t let you upload photos with comments, so please email them to me:  dexter (at) dexterspeaks.com.

So cute, costumed, Photoshop-ed.. whatever. Send me a photo!!!   dexter (at) dexterspeak.com. I’ll include an eye-popping new pic of yours truly, courtesy of my BFs 13-year-old daughter, a big Photoshop fan.

Eye-poppin' Dexter

– Dexter

Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning.

Ladies and gentleman my question to you is…..HAVE YOU DONE YOUR HOMEWORK? Okay, I know you’re saying to yourselves where is she going with this? For those of you who know me by now, you know what I’m talking about. Before you get serious or get your heart all invested in another person, have you found out everything there is to know all about them? Did you ask all the necessary questions, meet the family to see if they are sane or have a history of abuse, or drug usage, etc.? Did you run a background check? Have your friends and family checked the person out? Did you search the internet or hire a detective? Have you seen any signs that told you or is telling you to run for your life and don’t look back?

You have these smart young ladies with college degrees, masters and bachelors, etc. running behind these jokers who won’t even work in a pie factory let alone treat them the way they deserve to be treated. Then you have these really hardworking, loving, gentle, faithful men who fall for these women who are lazy, gold digging, mean, etc. Everyone is buying “Love.” What is up with that? I mean the list can go on and on with both of these scenarios.

Tell me what grade of person do you want, an A, B or C? Again my theory is no one is doing their homework and when you don’t do your homework you end up with a “BIG FAT ZERO.” We don’t care about the substance of a human being, just the outward appearance. We only care about how they make you feel at that time (lust), and what they can do for you (selfish). Some fall into another category, they know the person is wrong for them but for some reason they think “LOVE” can change him or her into this wonderful person……NOT! If you are a believer you should know better. You couldn’t even change yourself. If someone shows you who they are up front that is who they are, period. Only God can do the changing.

The sad thing is we take more time shopping for our outfits than we do finding out who we are “hooking up with.” We spend hours looking for the right shoe to match our dress and handbag, or spend hours buying a new car or selecting a course in school or a career, but we won’t invest the time or energy to finding out who we are letting into our sacred place. Our bodies are the temple of the Holy Ghost so why are you mixing darkness with light, the devil with the Lord.

In this life you can get schooled (played) or be schooled (smart), the choice is up to you. Everybody wants to be loved and for the most part I believe there is someone out there for everyone. The fact is we don’t use the right tools to find them (the Word). Are we a good judge of character? We may not be, but God is. He knows how many strands of hair is on your head; wouldn’t He know the right companion for you? Okay then, why aren’t you going to the source, “The Creator,” when it comes to relationships with the opposite sex? What really frustrates me, is seeing good people in a relationship with the wrong person.

Believe me, YOU WILL BE TESTED. No man can serve two masters. God will have no other gods before Him. He has a purpose for your life and he will not allow anything or anyone to get in the way of it. Thus he will remove the hindrances out of your way; for your good and for His glory. So if you are single and looking for a long term, serious relationship, please save yourself a lot of unnecessary grief, and look deep before you leap…….”DO YOUR HOMEWORK!!!”

Ella D. Fleming
©Copyright 11/09

Each fall, as schedules allow, a group of us guys gather in Montauk, NY for a couple of days of fishing and camaraderie.  And some excellent dining.

Even though the rendezvous was originally a tent camping trip and meals were prepared over the fire, on the grill or with the Coleman stove, the quality and sophistication of some of the meals has always been remarkable.  

The first year I went, we were treated to some fish in a puttanesca-style sauce. Another year, we decided to crush up some of the wasabi peas brought along as a snack and use them to crust a striper fillet.  And then there was the year I modified one of Emeril Lagasse’s recipes for potato crusted halibut wrapped in slices of prosciutto.

Challenging ourselves to prepare “dinner party” quality fare in a rustic setting was as much a part of the fun as the pre-dawn rides out to the fishing grounds on the charter boat or the lively conversation while imbibing pre-dinner Manhattans around the campfire. The move to more comfortable lodgings of a borrowed house and a real kitchen three years ago has neither raised nor lowered the quality of the food presented.

As with any cooking, it was the freshness of the ingredients that really made the meals spectacular.  You cannot best a properly cooked piece of fish that is just hours out of the water. Proof of this became readily apparent the first year I participated in this trip. 

While the primary quarry of our fishing trips is striped bass, there is an almost unavoidable side catch of bluefish.  I was surprised at how readily I enjoyed the bluefish caught and cooked the same day, where as a rule I would avoid that fish.

So it has become the standard that each dinner prepared on the trip features both striper and blue.  And each evening’s meal presents cook and diner alike with opportunities to expand on the repertoire of striped bass and bluefish preparation.

This year’s trip, my first since 2006 due to work conflicts, was no different.  As usual, there were at least as many ideas on how to serve the fish as there were fishermen at the table. The dinner menu after the first day’s fishing reflected the input of those present:

The first dish came from Chris Schlesinger’s book “Big Flavors of the Hot Sun” by way of fishing buddy Kevin O’Connor who couldn’t wait to get this dish on the table for our evaluation.  {Kevin’s notes — “Needless to say, the main ingredient is bluefish, caught that day, preferably by the cook!  Best if you use a sauté pan you can place in the oven. Experiment, and enjoy with a cold IPA…“}

• Make a rub of 1 part cumin, 1 part smoked paprika, 1/2 part kosher salt, 1/2 part fresh ground black pepper.
• Rub the bluefish fillets.
• Sear both sides (briefly) and set aside.
• Chop one large yellow onion and sauté in olive oil for 5-6 minutes until clear. Add minced garlic (2 or 3 cloves). Sauté for a few more minutes.
• Coarsely chop up a tomato or two.  Add to the sauté pan. Add 3/4 or 1 cup of OJ, juice of two limes, 1 tbsp ground cinnamon, some fresh oregano if you have it (not much), a few chipotle peppers minced, and a handful of raisins. Organic golden raisins, if you have them.
• Bring to simmer, place crusted fillets back in pan and finish in oven at 350 degrees – 10-12 minutes or until fish is just opaque.

• Empty one can of anchovy fillets and their oil into a large skillet along with a couple of tablespoons of olive oil
• Place pan over low heat and stir occasionally until the anchovies start to dissolve into the oil.
• Add four finely chopped garlic cloves, some black pepper and a pinch of red pepper flakes (optional).
• In the meantime, have your water for cooking the spaghetti started and at a boil. Add pasta to water and cook until al dente.  (NOTE: I used a multi-grain variety for a more hearty flavor and texture)
• Cut bluefish fillet into roughly one inch cubes and add the bluefish to the skillet
• Stir occasionally to prevent sticking and cook until fish is just cooked through.
• Drain pasta (you can add a couple of spoonfuls of the pasta water to the skillet if you like) and place in serving bowl.  Pour contents of skillet over the pasta, toss and serve.

We took a large striped bass fillet and prepared it for grilling: salt, pepper, a splash of white wine.  Unfortunately, the grill ran out of propane just as we were ready to put the fish on to cook.  So we quickly fired up the oven and baked the fish at 325 degrees until it was just done. In the meantime, in a small pan on the stove top I melted 3 ounces of white truffle butter.*  The fillet was removed from the oven and placed it on a serving platter, then drizzled with the melted white truffle butter.

While we had the relative luxury of indoor accommodations and a working kitchen, any of the dishes we prepared this trip could easily have been accomplished in our make shift camp kitchens of previous years.   

Inside or outside, it doesn’t really matter as long as the fish is fresh.

*D’Artagnan produces both white and black truffle butters that can be found in many higher end grocery stores or specialty food shops.  Or you can do as I did and soften a stick of sweet butter and blend in a few drops of white truffle oil to taste. Place the flavored butter on a piece of plastic wrap, roll it into a small log shape, seal tightly and refrigerate until ready to use.

Regret

As I reflect on paths not taken -
I stand remiss of the words I have left unspoken.
It is not that my heart ached more, or that my heart ached less
but that my heart aches now as I never imagined
how much my heart truly ached
- For you.

© Charles Coakley Simpson 2009