Meditation is generally popular among all people around the world to get rid of stress, anger, depression and other negative feelings. Meditation is an important tool to achieve mental clarity and health. Research has shown that Meditation can contribute to an individual’s psychological and physiological well-being. This is accomplished as Meditation brings the brainwave pattern into an alpha state, which is a level of consciousness that promotes the healing state. There is scientific evidence that Meditation can improve blood pressure and relieve pain and stress.

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Here are a few quick ways in which golfers can learn to control anger when on the course.

Anger really is one of the most detrimental emotions in life in general as well as when on the golf course. For someone who suffers from the grips of this emotion it is useful to have several different methods to fall back upon so as to stop anger from ruining your golf. The following is a short list of anger management tips which you may find useful.

1. Breathing – Your mind and body are intrinsically linked. Mind works on body, body works on mind. It’s impossible for your mind to be tense and your body relaxed and vice versa. By relaxing your breathing you will automatically relax your mind. Breathe through your abdomen, not your chest. Five deep breaths will do the trick.

2. Reach for that Hamlet – Remember the Hamlet cigar advert? Try it without a cigar for a healthy version – take a step back, sit under a tree and take a few deep breaths – that’ll relax you nicely. It’s not the nicotine which relaxes you (nicotine is a stimulant, after all); it’s the step back and the deep breath which does the trick.

3. Ping an elastic band – you’ve seen smokers doing this one. Wear an elastic band on your wrist and every time you get a thought or feeling you don’t want to have you ping the band hard so that it hurts you so much you can’t even feel angry!

4. Go to your happy place – Everyone can do this one. Remember the film “Happy Gilmore”?

5. Pre shot routine – Hopefully, you all have one of these. The reason for having a consistent pre-shot routine is to absorb your mind in the detail of the task at hand, and in so doing any other not-so-productive thoughts are displaced. If you thought it unnecessary to have a set routine, think again.

6. Post shot routine – De-Brief. I bet not many golfers have one of these. It’s an “OK that happened. Not what I wanted, but it did.” Then you visualize what you did want to happen and replace the memory immediately, so that next time you come across a similar situation you remember the perfect shot (not the duff one that you did hit). How can you feel angry when you’re choosing to remember the perfect shot?

7. Think “smooth” – smooth movements. Angry people are tense and jerky. Consciously smooth out your walk, pretend you’re gliding, floating along the fairway, and then it’s impossible to feel angry. Like I said before your mind and body are intrinsically linked.

8. Be in the “now” – you might think you are, but are your thoughts really on the present moment? A Stanford University study found that the average person has 60,000 thoughts a day, 59,500 of which are the same as the day before – indicating that it’s a really tiny percentage of time that people are really “in the now”. If you’re in the now, you can’t worry about past failures, you can’t worry about future outcomes; all you are doing is concentrating on the present and there’s nothing in the present that can really make you angry.

9. Dissociation – have you ever had that feeling that you’re there, but not there? Or maybe a feeling that you can almost float up onto the ceiling and look down at yourself? This is great on the golf course. Imagine how good you could feel, just drifting out of your body, floating up in the air and distancing yourself from all those unnecessary emotions? You could even float right on off to your happy place!

10. Where there’s a will, there’s a way – If you want to deal with things better you can; if you don’t want to you can’t.

Roseanna Leaton, specialist in golf hypnosis cds and hypnosis mp3 downloads.

http://www.GolferWithin.com

http://www.RoseannaLeaton.com

Displays of anger of the golf course are not pleasant to behold. Some people have learned to control their emotions whilst others have not undertaken this learning curve. But it is never too late to learn.

Golf is a game and should be fun. Fun is what it’s all about; playing a great game with a few pals. No matter how good a golfer you are and no matter how important your golf may have become to you, it’s still a game and should be enjoyed in the spirit of the game. It’s a recreational activity, which you should find relaxing.

Do you find it relaxing? Or do you find your emotions being affected in a rather different way as you play this great game? Do you find yourself hacking your golf clubs into the ground, or slinging them across the fairway? Do you find yourself muttering four letter words under your breath (or out loud)?

We all have caricatures in our minds of the true “Mr. Angry”. Are you a “Mr. Angry golfer?” If so, would it be handy to be able to change?

Anger is a normal and usually healthy human emotion. When anger is controlled, or managed, it will not cause you, or anyone around you, any harm. But when it is out of control it will become destructive. Uncontrolled anger is a major cause of conflict in both personal and professional relationships, on an off the golf course.

Anger is an emotional state which may vary in intensity and which is accompanied by physiological and biological changes – your heart rate increases, blood pressure rises, adrenaline is secreted at a greater level. Not very helpful when you’re trying to play a game that requires a state of relaxed concentration in order to be able to put your best swing on the golf ball.

Anger is caused by your own perception of events, whether that event is happening now, or in the past, or you are anticipating a future event. It is important that you understand this fact. You create your own anger. Your golf ball may have found its way into the trees, or a plugged lie; there may be a lack of baskets at the range or the tee box may not be level…but “it” did not make you angry…You did.

You will no doubt have wondered how some golfers remain calm, or even laugh, no matter what happens to their ball whilst others “blow” or “flip” at the slightest thing. The difference is that some people have learnt to manage their anger, whilst others have given in to it.

You have probably watched “Fawlty Towers” and laughed at Basil’s antics. But isn’t the entire series based on taking off mismanaged anger and frustration? And the exaggerated body language demonstrates beautifully the actual effect of anger – raised voice, jerky movements, clenched fists, and…a direction for the anger – usually Manuel or Mrs. Fawlty…and the disastrous results that are achieved reflect the destructive effect of uncontrolled anger.

And the equivalent of Basil in golf can be equally amusing some of the time…or perhaps embarrassing, depending on how you see it. The direction for the anger is usually the ball, the clubs, the nearest gorse bush, and so on. In extreme cases the entire trolley and clubs have been known to be launched into water and never retrieved!

The question is how have those non-angry people learnt to manage their anger? How can “Basil” learn to manage his anger? And, more importantly, do you want to control your anger? Because if you don’t want to, you won’t even try. Everyone can change so long as they want to. You’re not born angry, you just haven’t learnt how to manage your anger.

Roseanna Leaton, specialist in golf hypnosis cds and hypnosis downloads.

http://www.GolferWithin.com

http://www.RoseannaLeaton.com
]]> http://kindkerry.wordpress.com/2009/04/01/dont-go-to-bed-angry/ Wed, 01 Apr 2009 22:41:37 +0000 kindkerry80 http://kindkerry.wordpress.com/2009/04/01/dont-go-to-bed-angry/

TODAY’S SCRIPTURE

A PRAYER FOR TODAY

Anger is defined as a strong feeling of displeasure or hostility and is a root cause of many problems, unless an effective form of anger management is used.

Anger is an emotion that needs to be managed. Sometimes anger leans to dissolve families. So, anger management is crucial. Many people are trying to figure out ways to manage anger:

You may use humor. If any argument makes you angry, you can awake amusement and pleasure that will ease the situation. It will make you also feel peaceful.

If between you and your spouse are disputes about something and the argumentation leans to become a fight, and then switch the topic immediately. It will help you to control your anger.

If your youngster does any naughty things it will be better if you’ll simply get out of the room and take some minutes to calm down. This will be very helpful because if you beat your kid will surely not resolve anything and you’ll absolutely feel guilty. So it will be better to calm down and talk to your child.

Our babies may acquire violence expressing their anger due to movies, television, music and Internet. The best ways to control kid’s anger is to teach them by showing yourself as a good model. We had better help them otherwise indirectly we’ll harm the children and others. Kids are imitating their parents. So if you became furious, then tell the child that you are angry and so you are going for a walk. This will help your child learn how to manage anger.

If your child is tempestuous with you then you should deal the problem very carefully. Tell your kid that you will listen what he or she wants only if he or she is calmed down. This will instruct your child to state his anger peacefully.

Also teach him how to take deep breathe and counting up to 10 while he is angry. This will reduce the anger and will make him behave in a cultured manner.

www.masteringanger.com

Walter Mischel and researchers at Stanford University conducted a series of experiments by tempting four-year-olds with marshmallows.  They put a child in a room and placed a single marshmallow in front of him or her.  Then, they told the child that he or she could have the marshmallow right then, but if he or she could wait until the researcher returned, the child would get a second marshmallow.

Some of the pre-schoolers were able to wait for fifteen or twenty minutes for the researcher to return.  To distract themselves from the temptation of the marshmallow, they sang songs, covered their eyes, made up games to play with their hands or feet or even tried to make themselves go to sleep.  The more impulsive children grabbed the single marshmallow almost immediately after the researcher left the room.

In a follow-up study (Shoda, Mischel, & Peake, 1990), the same children were tested at 18 years of age.  The children who had resisted temptation in the experiments were found to be more assertive, self-reliant, trustworthy, eager to learn and academically competent.  They showed consistent ability to delay gratification in pursuit of their goals, control their temper and work under pressure.  They also had SAT scores (a test administered in the U.S. to assess students’ verbal and math skills for college admissions) that were 210 points higher than those who ate the marshmallows while the researchers were away.*

Our ability or inability to delay gratification is a major factor in the likelihood of our success.  Those who can wait patiently and deny themselves what they don’t absolutely have to have today win in the end.  Those who must satisfy every urge as soon as they have it end up exchanging the best for the adequate.  They chase after get-rich-quick schemes and shortcuts to the top, but seldom do they realize their ambitions.  When they finally give in to reality (if they ever do), they find they have to start back at the very beginning and put in the work that will prepare them for reaching their goals.

This is particularly relevant for us in Christian ministry.  God’s timing is never hurried.  His purposes are accomplished according to His schedule, not ours.  When we get God’s vision, our tendency may be to run ahead of Him to accomplish it.  Consider Abraham’s initial approach to becoming the father of many nations or King Saul’s approach to preparing his army to gain victory in battle.  Each had devastating consequences.  Through Hagar, Abraham fathered nations of people who are perpetually at war with the descendants of his son, Isaac.  And by administering the sacrifice himself instead of waiting for Samuel to arrive, King Saul lost his kingdom.

We should be more like David, who refused to raise his hand against God’s anointed even though he had also been anointed to be king over Israel.  For possibly seven years, David was a hunted man, hiding in caves in the wilderness of Ziph, but he waited on the Lord’s timing to ascend to the throne.  Then, he waited another seven years before becoming king of a united Israel.  That’s delayed gratification!

So practice saying, “No,” to yourself today.  The delayed marshmallow is sweeter and worth the wait.

* Impulsive students scored an average of 524 verbal and 528 math.  Non-impulsive students scored 610 verbal and 652 math.  800 is the top score for each part of the test, with a combined potential of 1600.

(S – Yuichi Shoda, W. Mischel, and P.K. Peake, “Predicting Adolescent Cognitive and Social Competence from Preschool Delay of Gratification: Identifying Diagnostic Conditions,” Developmental Psychology 26 (1990), 978-986.)

Is anger so funny to us that it is used as comedy?  Some of us have seen the movie with Jack Nicholson about anger management.  It is said to be great comedy.  Whenever you turn the television on you will see some sit com where one of the characters is angry and that seems to bring about hoards of laughter.  Anger is not a laughing matter at least not to the person on the receiving end of it.

Is anger a state of mind, I suppose it is.  Happiness, contentment and joy are also states of mind.  You can wake up in the morning feeling great whether the sun is shinning or not or you can get up on the wrong side of the bed as the saying goes.  Some people hate Mondays and that makes them angry, others hate their job so first thing in the morning they are angry.  My grandson tells me that there is one teacher at his school who shows no respect to the boys in his class and that makes him very angry.  So is anger a state of mind?

Anger has physical effects on the body.  If you cannot express your anger is it detrimental to your health?  In Chinese medicine they believe anger affects the liver. Anger creates stress hormones such as adrenaline and cortisol.    With the constant flow of these hormones health problems can arise in the short term, problems such as headaches, high blood pressure, depression, insomnia to name a few.

Anger will affect your love ones and have a negative impact on the family.  This negative feeling will also be directed towards the person who is angry.  In the end it will make everyone, including the angry person fearful and guilty which does not help the situation.  Members of the family will be walking on eggshells so as not to upset or cause an angry reaction or an argument.  This causes stress all round and ill health within the household

There are many causes for anger.  I have an uncle of 80 years who is frequently angry and uses quite obscene language to the people who are trying to help him.  Does old age make people angry or is it just old age.  I myself get angry if I am not feeling well or things are not going right on a particular day.  Getting on the bus, driving, waiting in traffic the list can go on and on and we all have various degrees of tolerance.

We need to keep a check on our feelings and reasoning when we meet situations that will frustrate and eventually make us angry.  Getting angry in traffic is a waste of energy because short of taking another route there is nothing that can do about it.  Kicking the dog only hurts the poor dog and breaking plates costs money for replacements.  Hurt feelings with your family cannot be mended easily so we need to keep a check on our reactions to situations.

 How to manage your anger, well there are a number of ways to do this and one way is to seek professional help if you believe things are out of control.   Click Here