From deciding which goaltender to play to deciding what style of play would allow the injury-ravaged Vancouver Canucks to withstand their version of Survivor, the club can look at the newly-acquired Derek Roy and the newly-healed Ryan Kesler and look at the game differently. From passive to pushing the pace. From defence first to offence. To drawing penalties and actually converting those opportunities. Imagine that?

“For sure,” suggested winger Chris Higgins, who signed a four-year, $10 million extension Tuesday that has a partial no-movment clause. “Look at all the points Kes and Derek have put up in the past and that will help get our offence going. And that little breath of fresh air with Derek, it should be interesting to see how it develops. It’s a lot more fun when you’re scoring goals and we’re not used to putting up one or two a game and only coming out on top if our goalies play well.”

With Roy centring Higgins and Jannik Hansen at practice Wednesday and Kesler working between Mason Raymond and either Alex Burrows or Zack Kassian — when the former Selke Trophy winner returns for the stretch drive after fracturing his right foot and Raymond mends a shoulder strain — the Canucks believe they can contend in the wild west. Even without physical wingers Ryane Clowe and Raffi Torres, who they tried to land at the NHL trade deadline. And even with conference rivals adding to their arsenals with Jason Pominville going to Minnesota and Marian Gaborik to Columbus.

“Pominville was our captain in Buffalo and is a great leader and a good player with a good shot and Gaborik obviously has tremendous speed,” said the diminutive Roy, and unrestricted free agent who was acquired from Dallas on Tuesday for a second-round 2013 draft pick and minor-league defenceman Kevin Connauton. “They’re two good players and that might give them a resurgence.”

The Canucks hope they can say the same. In Roy, they get a small but quick and crafty playmaker who had four goals and 22 points in 30 games with the Stars this season. Although far removed from 32, 28 and 22-goal seasons with the Sabres, the 5-foot-8 centre has played in 41 playoff games and knows what awaits.

“It’s a grind and you have to stay even-keeled,” said the 29-year-old Ottawa native. “It’s mostly about how hard are you going to work at the system and how you’re going to listen to the coach. I just have to play my game. Set up plays and score, use my linemates, get to the net and do all the little things that win games.

“I played against Higgins a lot when he was in Montreal and he’s a good player who works hard, makes nice moves and finds his linemates. We’re going to have to talk a lot and keep a lot of communication lines open and know what we’re doing on the ice.”

Roy worked the second power-play unit Wednesday with Higgins and rookie Nicklas Jensen and anything to improve the 29th-ranked power play is a plus. Henrik Sedin was between Burrows and Hansen on the first unit with Daniel Sedin and Jason Garrison on the points.

“Derek is going to be a big help to us on the power play and five-on-five,” predicted Henrik. “Getting Kes back and with Derek, they’re point-a-game guys and it’s also going to put guys back into positions where they feel comfortable. We’ve played shorthanded most of the year and people don’t realize what we’ve been through. Through injuries we got worse.”

The Canucks now believe they’re better. How much better remains to be seen. They need Kesler’s two-way dominance and Kassian’s single focus after being recalled Wednesday from the Chicago Wolves in what the Canucks called more “seasoning”. They need more great goaltending and a better overall push. Roy is a step in the right direction, according to Higgins.

“Smart. Savvy,” he said. “He makes really good passes over the blueline and makes that pass when some players have to chip it in — he can make that and wins a lot of puck battles.”

Kesler is out of his protective boot and was doing off-ice drills Wednesday. He’s expected to skate soon and Raymond’s status is list as day-to-day. And if Kassian can develop more professionalism, who knows what may develop in this bunch?

“When we’re healthy we’re a good team,” said Canucks coach Alain Vigneault. “Sometimes your personnel permits you to play one way or it permits you to play another way to win games.”

The improving roster is starting to dictate an up-tempo approach is on the horizon. And with the Edmonton Oilers here Thursday, maybe it’s time to mash that gas pedal and get off the brakes.

bkuzma@theprovince.com

twitter.com/benkuzma

Zack Kassian has been recalled by Vancouver Canucks after the young, impressionable and wayward winger was re-assigned to the Chicago Wolves on Sunday for what coach Alain Vigneault called “seasoning” after he missed eight of nine games with a back ailment. Well, it’s not Kassian’s game that needed work in the AHL, it was his approach to being a consummate professional on and off the ice in the Vancouver fishbowl. If the Canucks have to keep Kassian on a short leash to get the most out of a big, physical winger who could bring a playoff presence to the top-six mix, so be it. And if they have to give it a yank once in a while, all the better. Anything to get his complete attention.

With five goals in his first seven games on the top line, Kassian played with power, poise, feistiness and finish. He became a fan favourite and was the toast of the town. However, for a 22-year-old still learning the challenges of collecting a big cheque and unrelenting attention of the faithful, it can come with pitfalls. Everybody knows your name. Everybody knows your game. And it seems everybody has a camera phone where your image can change in one click.

“Definitely, especially in a market like this,” Kassian told The Province last week. “It’s not Buffalo. “There are a lot of people who are fans a lot of people who are always watching. You definitely want to be pro on and off the ice. We have an older team and everybody expects a lot from each other and guys are going to have your back. It’s kind of the way we work.

“I’m really focused in helping the team have a good stretch. I believe I’m a playoff player and I can show people what I can do. I’m really excited.”

So are the Canucks. If Kassian lines up with Henrik and Daniel Sedin in the postseason, Ryan Kesler could work between Mason Raymond and Alex Burrows. That would put Derek Roy between Chris Higgins and Jannik Hansen. Ryane Clowe or Raffi Torres could have helped that mix and the Canucks tried to add a physical presence at the NHL trade deadline, but Kassian could provide that.

As long as his head is on straight and his game is ramped up.

OF NOTE — Winger Bill Sweatt has be re-assigned to the Wolves.

bkuzma@theprovince.com

twitter.com/benkuzma

1. DOES EVERYBODY LOVE RAYMOND?: We’re told that Mason Raymond suffered a shoulder strain Saturday in Edmonton. We know the speedy winger is a pending unrestricted free agent, who was taken to cut-down arbitration in the offseason by the Vancouver Canucks. The sobering $325,000 US pay cut put a chip on his shoulder to get a one-year deal for $2.275 million. And instead of sulking, Raymond found his stride, shot and confidence to such a degree that he is an attractive commodity.

Raymond is in line for a hefty pay raise next season. But where? You can argue that the best time to deal any player is when he has the most playing worth — and the Canucks could lose him for nothing in the offseason — and roster curiosity and a speed need are paramount now with Raymond. But any team acquiring the winger must be confident enough that drawing up a new deal would just be a formality and not a drawn-out process — even with the salary cap ceiling dropping to $64.3 million US next season. Raymond had been effective on a Canucks speed line with Jordan Schroeder and Jannik Hansen, but the acquisition of centre Derek Roy changes the dynamic. So does the postseason. And there’s the rub.

Raymond has but seven goals in 51 playoff games but is this his playoff breakout spring? You can also see him on a second line with Ryan Kesler and Alex Burrows, while Zack Kassian skates with Henrik and Daniel Sedin. You can also see him somewhere else next season and hitting a home run in free agency. One thing we didn’t see is Raymond being moved at the trade deadline. Maybe he goes home to Calgary in the offseason and plays for the Flames. One thing is certain. He won’t take a pay cut.

2. ADIOS, KIPPER: With Miikka Kiprsuoff announcing today that he’s going to play out his existing contract with the Calgary Flames and probably retire at the end of the season, the goalposts in a possible Roberto Luongo trade have shifted once again. If the Toronto Maple Leafs are serious about acquiring a proven starter — they talked at length to Kiprusoff about the parameters of coming to the Maple Leafs as a UFA and also discussed a contract extension — then any talks before the deadline with the Vancouver Canucks will change. General manager Mike Gillis got his centre, but basically needs to replace the picks he coughed up because the deal cost him a second rounder and Kevin Connauton was a third-round pick. The Canucks could use size, they could use a depth defenceman with Keith Ballard out with a foot fracture and Kevin Bieksa playing through bothersome groin strains. Luongo has arrived for practice at Rogers Arena. In the end, the Canucks tried to move Luongo but couldn’t. They tried to land Ryane Clowe and Raffi Torres but couldn’t.

3. GET ZACK BACK: What can Zack Kassian learn in Chicago on his current “seasoning” stint in the AHL? Probably nothing. If the hulking winger has fallen out of favour with the Canucks for his lack of professionalism on and off the ice, deal with it and move on and get him out of there. The Canucks need Kassian in the postseason. They need  him back on the top line with the Sedins where he scored five goals in his first seven games this season. They didn’t land Ryane Clowe or Raffi Torres, so the Kassian dynamic is a much bigger one now. Players will tell you it’s easier to play in the NHL than the AHL. You have to do your job and somebody else’s in the minors where there’s such a wide range of skill. In the NHL, you do your job and that’s where Kassian needs to hone his game before the playoffs. Do it in Vancouver. Not Chicago.

bkuzma@theprovince.com

twitter.com/benkuzma

The Canucks actually scored two goals last night but, as we consider this Tuesday morning edition of our Hat Trick of issues around this sadly sagging team, you have to wonder how many of their fans actually saw those tallies live.

1. Seriously, this team is pretty hard to watch right now unless you like pompous shots of Alain Vigneault standing like Hornblower, posing behind the bench. And by the time Chris Higgins got them on the board last night, the tune-out factor had to be pretty significant, the three goals before you could say “Alex Edler” pretty much getting most any sane fan to turn the channel and perhaps catch the Diamondbacks and Cardinals or some other such solace.

Really, anything but watch this team try to mount some offence when the Sedins are just mailing it in and so many of the other forwards they have dressed look like they’re not even considering the possibility of a scoring chance, let alone scoring. Did Jordan Schroeder and Andrew Ebbett even play last night? We know they’re small, but attaining invisibility to the point where the team’s best centre, by a mile, was Alex Burrows, is a genuine feat.

But enough of trying to make a case about this, that’s for Sportsnet and their sponsors to worry about. Consider the fact even Ryan Kesler appeared not to care a whole lot, given he was spotted at the Rihanna concert, although we’ll presume he at least had the courtesy to PVR it at home. That way you can fast forward through it, and not waste quite so much of your time.

2. You’re having trouble scoring goals and you surely want to get the Sedins going, right? So wouldn’t it be reasonable to go to one of the two wingers who has had the most success with them this year, to see if you can get your top line to look at least mildly interested in scoring to begin the game?

So what do they do? They put a promising rookie with them, normally a great way to start a kid’s career when things are going well. But under these circumstances it looked to most like grasping at straws. They wanted to try Burrows, one of the forwards who has had some success with the two people who must perform for your team to have a chance, and that worked out well. No problems there. But the other guy who’s produced on their flank, one Zack Kassian, is in the minors. The explanation for this bizarre behavior is apparently that they want him to play big minutes in Chicago, get on the power play and have some success to boost his confidence level. But who is he going to play with down there? There are more prospects on the Bikini Atoll than Vancouver has down there at the moment. Kassian’s likely to get more confidence playing table hockey. They dressed fully five forwards last night that can’t hold a candle to this kid now, even if he’s out of shape, and we can only guess that not including him in the lineup last night was some sort of April Fool’s joke.

Man, these are strange, strange days with this team.

3. The good news, other than Kesler’s cheery scan, was that Cory Schneider got right back on the horse last night and clearly handled himself extremely well, thus passing his first test, if you will, of his ability to be a longterm starter. Yes, he’s had good runs before but this was the first time he’s ever had a good long run, had a dreadful start, been yanked, and the coach went right back to him. In the past Roberto Luongo was virtually always afforded this courtesy, but this is the first time Schneider has been given similar treatment. He took the vote of confidence straight to the bank and while you might have liked him to make at least one of those stops on the three rapid-fire goals that beat him, he certainly made enough great saves to more than earn his paycheque on the evening.

Given the Canucks had two, maybe three scoring chances at the most before the roof fell in, you can hardly pin any of the blame for this clanger on your goaltending. And it’s that position which is solely responsible for this team holding down a playoff position at the moment.

It was followed by the predictable April Fools hashtag and the joke was about as effective as the Vancouver Canucks’ 30th-ranked power play. Then again, the third meeting of the season with the San Jose Sharks tonight at 7:30 p.m. has already been overshadowed by what’s occurring off the ice. Hulking Sharks winger Ryane Clowe is expected to be moved before the Wednesday trade deadline — Philadelphia is the latest rumoured front-runner while Minnesota and the Canucks have kicked the tires on the pending unrestricted free agent — and there is always a buzz around Luongo in a crowded crease. If all he’s going to command now is a second-round pick and a prospect — and not a third-line centre and a backup — the Canucks are better off to finally resolve the issue at the draft. And they might be bettter off just renting a centre at the deadline with the sobering realization that this might not be their year.

If that isn’t enough drama, winger Mason Raymond is out with a shoulder strain and his no-show at the game-skate skate created a brief buzz about a possible trade. He has nine goals but his contract is expiring and he doesn’t bring cost certainty to a suitor.

“I can’t comment on what other teams are doing, but I can tell you we’re not sellers,” said Canucks coach Alain Vigneault.

But the Canucks are banged up and struggling to such a degree offensively that there are other elements at play.

Recalled wingers Nicklas Jensen and Bill Sweatt will play their first and third NHL games respectively and the Dane will line up with Henrik and Daniel Sedin tonight.

“I’m a little nervous but excited and I can’t wait to step on the ice and get the first shift over with and move on from there,” said the 20-year-old Jensen, the club’s fist-round pick in 2011, who has two goals in 11 games with the Chicago Wolves this season after amassing 17 goals and 23 points in 50 games with AIK Stockholm in the Swedish Elite League. “It’s hard to put into words and it’s unbelievable to be playing with the twins. I feel like I’ve prepared well for this and to show what I’ve got and this has been my dream since being a little kid.”

Jensen and Sweatt arrive with Zack Kassian sent to the Wolves on a conditioning stint and Andrew Gordon re-assigned to the AHL affiliate.

There’s also the wait to see what comes of a scan on Ryan Kesler’s fractured right foot and the wait to see if the Canucks can bounce back from an embarrassing 4-0 loss in Edmonton on Saturday. Cory Schneider allowed two goals on the game’s first two shots and Luongo then allowed two on the first three he faced.

With the 19th-ranked offence and worst power play and a roster that looks more like the Wolves, the Canucks will be hard pressed to solve the Sharks. They’ve won four straight, have the top-ranked home penalty kill, have found the right line combinations and have a 4-1 and a 3-2 shootout win over the Canucks this season. They’re 11-1-1 when leading after two periods and look for like the team that started the season with seven-straight wins than the one that dropped the next seven. And the Canucks didn’t look like a team that won six straight when they were bombed by the Oilers.

“It wasn’t the effort we wanted or I wanted and you move on,” said Schneider who starts tonight. “I’m not really thinking about it because we’ve got a tough test against a team that’s playing really well and they’ve always been good in their building (11-1-4). They throw a lot of pucks at the net and put a lot of action on you and there’s always some movement going on. You have to keep track of who’s where and when guy like (Joe) Thornton gets set up on the goalie, it’s kind of like anybody is open.”

The Sharks are excelling despite the ongoing Clowe trade watch. They will have defenceman Brent Burns back up left wing with Martin Havlat and Thornton as the recalled Matt Tennyson — the first grad from the Junior Sharks program to play for the club — pairs with Brad Stuart. Burns has five goals and has made a smooth transition to the wing, much like Keith Ballard did with the Canucks.

“I think I’m better as a D-man but I think I’m good at both,” said Burns. “I played a lot of forward as a kid and you make a lot of mistakes moving up because you don’t know how to react and the skating is totally different with the stride.”

As for Clowe, you’d never know the 30-year-old has been mentioned in several trade scenarios. He’s calm and reflective.

“Would I be surprised? Probably not and I wouldn’t be shocked,” the goalless winger said of moving on. “If something doesn’t happen, I’ll handle it like I handled the last three games. I’ll play my ass off and I usually play my best hockey down the stretch and into the playoffs. And that’s what team’s are looking for and will probably look at my body of work.”

The Canucks have looked but the expected asking price for Clowe is a first-rounder and a prospect. But imagine him with the Sedins? And he played for Vigneault in junior.

“I would love to play for him again,” said Clowe. “I like where my game is at now and I’m all in until I’m gone. And I don’t look at Vancouver being that old or have peaked already and are on the way down. They have a really good team and missing a huge piece with Kesler. Once they get into the playoffs, whoever plays them will have their hands full.

“They play with a bit of an edge and don’t shy away from that. I know because of the battles we had with them in the playoffs.”

OF NOTE — The Sharks have traded UFA centre Michal Handzus to Chicago for a fourth-round draft choice. He has one goal in 28 games.

bkuzma@theprovince.com

twitter.com/benkuzma

EXPECTED LINEUPS

CANUCKS

D.Sedin-H. Sedin-Jensen

Higgins-Burrows-Hansen

Sweatt-Schroeder-Lapierre

Sestito-Ebbett-Pinizzotto

Hamhuis-Garrison

Edler-Bieksa

Alberts-Tanev

Schneider

SHARKS

Marleau-Couture-Wingels

Havlat-Thornton-Burns

Galiardi-Pavelski-Clowe

Desjardins-Gomez-Burish

Iriwin-Boyle

Vlasic-Braun

Stuart-Tennyson

Niemi

1. Roberto Luongo had an astute observation earlier this year when he pointed out that most of the time when Alain Vigneault makes a counter-intuitive decision with his goaltending, it has a way of working out.

It did not tonight.

Vigneault over the years has never been a coach with a quick hook which is why it was a jarring, WTF moment to see him yank Cory Schneider, the hottest goalie in the league, after two goals off the first two shots in Edmonton.

The first was a great shot by Taylor Hall, and the second Schneider never saw. Why not call a timeout, and give Schneider a chance to play his way out of it?

What a strange time for the coach to go against type.

Luongo, the lifetime starter who thrives on games played, had to come in cold, playing his first hockey in nearly two weeks and just days from the trade deadline.

Luongo told reporters later he felt out of sorts all night and admitted he got caught out of position on several plays and had to make saves he’s not used to making.

He ended up playing fine but the damage was done when he was beat for two goals early.

Why put him in that spot? Especially when you consider it’s a delicate time, not sure a coach should be going out of his way to put the player his GM is trying to trade in a spot which may increase injury risk.

If Luongo had to sit in the crease for all eight goals in Detroit, why not stay with Schneider for three or four. Or five. He was the only reason the Canucks came into the game on a six-game winning streak.

2. Turned out the people sounding some alarm bells after the win against Colorado on Thursday, and at other points during the Canucks six-game winning streak, were on to something.

That game against Edmonton could have gone on for four more periods and the Canucks weren’t scoring a goal.

Down 4-0 they managed only a couple of scoring chances in the second period, and none, by my count, in the third, cobbling together just five shots.

The team just flatlined, showing nothing. The top line didn’t threaten to score. The power play and its blasted drop passes continued to do zilch and the fourth liners had zero impact. Less than zero.

The team had less emotion than Jay Leno.

If you were looking for some kind of push back, any sign of a team trying to claw their way back, you didn’t get it. Instead, the Taylor Hall, Ryan Nugent-Hopkins and Jordan Eberle line simply had their way with the Canucks.

In two consecutive third period shifts, they essentially did to the Canucks what Amanda Bynes said she wanted Drake to do to her in her infamous tweet.

Both shifts started with an Alex Edler turnover, and after each the Hall lined pinned Alex Burrows, Jordan Schroeder and Chris Higgins.

They beat them to loose pucks. They won puck battles. In fact, Hall did one of each to Burrows before creating a great chance in front of Luongo on the first of the two shifts, then he did it to Bieksa on the other.

They made the Canucks look helpless. And you know what? They were.

3. During the Hockey Night in Canada telecast, there seemed to be surprise that the Canucks have been criticized in Vancouver during their six-game winning streak.

That’s because the wins, which were the product of Cory Schneider out-goaltending his counterpart, had a way of covering the blemishes.

There is none uglier right now than the Canucks scoring. In the past seven games, they have beat a goalie for 11 goals.

The Canucks are now 20th in the NHL in goals scored. And if there was ever a reason to panic, this is it:

You remember the undermanned 2006-07 team? They one which looked so futile trying to score goals they generated random burst of laughter? The team that will forever be a punch line? That team that made Jeff Cowan a local folk hero for scoring six goals?

The 2013 Canucks are scoring fewer goals than that team (2.64 G/G to 2.51).

And this is essentially the same team finished fifth last year, obviously minus the two injuries to Ryan Kesler and David Booth.

There are lots of reasons why. Mike Gillis’s failure to acquire a centre. Daniel Sedin is on pace for a 20-goal 82-game season, instead of 30 goals. And the power play is dead last in the league.

But this is a defence that’s supposed to put up 200 points a year. Both Mason Raymond and Jannik Hansen are having exceptional seasons. And two Art Ross winners are playing on one line.

So, even with Kesler out of the lineup, there is no way the Canucks should be scoring fewer goals than the Phoenix Coyotes. There is no way this team should be scoring fewer goals than the joke Canucks from 2006-07.

There is no way they should be getting out-chanced regularly. But they are.

The concern is that while coach has them convinced they have to play a conservative, embrace-your-inner-trap to win, the team is losing all of its offensive instincts.

Maybe they already have.

Henrik Sedin says the power play needs to shoot more. (Getty Images.)

Colorado Avalanche (11-17-4) at Vancouver Canucks (18-9-6)

Rogers Arena

7 p.m.

Sportsnet/Team 1040

The Vancouver Canucks’ power-play units did an extra session prior to their morning skate Thursday.

Maybe that will get them going in the right direction.

Vancouver heads into this evening’s match-up with the Colorado Avalanche ranked 29th out of 30 teams in the man advantage, chugging away at 13.1 per cent success rate (16-of-122). Last season, they were fourth in the league, at 19.8 per cent, and two seasons ago they led the loop at 24.3 per cent.

They’re on a  2-for-53 run dating back to a Feb. 21 game against Dallas.

“If you look at the stats, there are no secrets,” said Henrik Sedin. “I think we have the least amount of shots on the power play of any team and that’s usually been our strength.

“When you see us score those nice power play goals, the tic-tac-toe, that usually comes off a good shot and getting to rebound. A lot of times this year, we’ve taken a shot and the rebound goes in the corner and they clear and we have to go for another breakout. It takes a lot of energy out of you.”

It’s no coincidence that Ryan Kesler (ankle), who proved so apt hammering away one-timers from the left face-off circle as well as winning draws for that first power play unit, has been missing for the past 14 games of that 18-game stretch.

Jannik Hansen was with the first unit Thursday morning, playing up front with Henrik and Daniel Sedin. Jason Garrison and Alexander Edler had the points.

A visit from Colorado could be exactly what the ailing man-advantage needs, though. The Avalanche have the league’s worst road penalty killing unit, working at 68.8 per cent (20 goals, 64 chances). Oddly enough, they’re third overall at home, thanks to a 90.5 per cent (six goals, 63 chances), which works out 79.5 per cent combined, which is good enough for 22nd overall.

“We need to proud that you’re on the power play,” Sedin said. “It’s a lot of hard work. You can’t go out there and think ‘It’s a power play…we can relax.’

“That’s the only way to get out of this.”

Colorado lost 4-3 in Calgary on Wednesday and they’re 2-11-3 on the road.

“I look at their line-up and the skill and potential of all those young players and I believe they have a good team,” Canucks coach Alain Vigneault said of the Avalanche. “They’ve got a great transition and they’ve got a lot of offence. I’m not exactly sure what’s happened to their overall season, but, in my opinion, when we talk about young teams on the verge of, I look at their potential and say that they’re one of those teams.”

PROJECTED LINE-UPS

Canucks

D.Sedin-H.Sedin-Burrows

Raymond-Schroeder-Hansen

Higgins-Ebbett-Pinizzotto

Sestito-Lapierre-Gordon

Edler-Bieksa

Hamhuis-Garrison

Alberts-Tanev

Schneider

Avalanche

Parenteau-Duchene-McGinn

Hejduk-O’Reilly-Landeskog

Kobasew-Mitchell-McLeod

Palushaj-Olver-Bordeleau

Hunwick-Johnson

Zanon-Barrie

O’Byrne-O’Brien

Varalmov

Get out. Get out right now. It’s been 21 years, you have no excuse!

The main issue I have with post game coverage is the general lack of personality conveyed by the majority of the league. The NHL has some of the classiest athletes and coaches in all of professional sports, but sometimes you just want to hear someone go off.

No canned responses about “working hard”, “winning the battles” and “living in the now” (you’ve been warned, Wayne’s World references abound). I would love it if there was a bit more colour in those interviews and players said what they were really thinking.

Stuff like this:

COLORADO AVALANCHE

Head Coach Joe Sacco – “It’s like players only do things because they get paid. And that’s just really sad”.

J.S. Giguere – “So I said ‘hey Canucks, if you’re gonna score… score into this’ and then I pointed at the net. And then they did, several times”.

Gabe Landeskog – “If I were president, I’d be Gabe-raham Lincoln”.

Ryan O’Reilly – “… well that’s where I see things just a little differently. Contract or no, I will not bow to any teammate”

Shane O’Brien – “I tested very high on the joke-ability scale”.

Milan Hejduk – “Why don’t I backcheck? Backchecking is punishment for shoplifting in some countries”.

Mark Olver – “We’re not worthy! We’re not worthy! We’re scum. We suck”.

VANCOUVER CANUCKS

Head Coach Alain Vigneault – “Canucks fans, if I blow up lines and we score you’re mine. If I don’t and we lose… it was never meant to be”.

Cory Schneider – “All I have to say is… ‘backupgoaliesayswhat?’ (looks at Luongo).

Roberto Luongo – “What?”

Henrik Sedin – “The Stanley Cup? It will be mine. Oh yes, it will be mine”

Daniel Sedin – “I don’t care how much time he spent here, Shane O’Brien is nobody’s friend. If Shane O’Brien were an ice cream flavour, he’d be pralines… and dumb penalties”.

Alex Burrows – “Sometimes I wish I could boldly try moves no man has tried before… but I’ll probably stay with the backhand.“

Jannik Hansen – “Winning makes me feel kinda funny. Like when I used to climb the rope in gym class”.

Ryan Kesler – “I’ve learned that a flawless profile, a perfect body, the right clothes, and a great car can get you far in the NHL – almost to the top – but it can’t get you everything.”.

Jason Garrison – “Actually, this city’s name is pronounced “Call-ah-rah-doh” which is Algonquin for “we can’t beat Vancouver at hockey”.

Alex Edler – “If Rick Nash didn’t get suspended for trying to sever someones head, I’m going to be very upset”. (commences being upset)

Mason Raymond – “It’s great having Keith Ballard out there to help us out at Left Schwing”.

Chris Higgins – “So the Avalanche are coached by Joe Sacco? He’ll probably get fired, right? Then it’s not just a clever name”.

Chris Tanev – “Isn’t it great that we’re all better players?”.

Dale Weise – “I picked up a little Dutch while I was in the Netherlands. A lot of the Kings players the other day sounded like they were from the Red Light District”

Cam Barker – “Keith Ballard is a sufficient winger? What a totally amazing, excellent discovery!”

Andrew Alberts – “I’m just as solid and reliable as ever… not!”

David Booth – “I do own many guns that would necessitate an entire rack.”.

Jordan Schroeder – “Look, the way I see it, I can stay here in the big leagues and play by the rules, or I can go back to the farm club in Chicago”.

Keith Ballard – “Playing winger is like a new pair of underwear. At first it’s constricting, but after a while it becomes a part of you”.

(Keith Ballard hurls!)

You can follow j.Bowman on twitter (@jBowmancouver). He has grey poupon.

After all, they have cooled off all the heated debate that they wouldn’t win with a depleted roster, that they didn’t have the talent or the urgency to ensure that the playoffs will be an attainable goal and not a failed quest. A 2-1 win over the Coyotes and 1-0 decision over the Kings came at a price and one the Canucks were willing to pay before facing the Colorado Avalanche today.

In Phoenix, it was Keith Ballard playing wing as Chris Higgins became the latest casualty with a sore back in the game-day skate and in Los Angeles, it was playing without the suspended Alex Edler. It was also Jordan Schroeder setting up the only goal against the defending Stanley Cup champions, Jannik Hansen hobbling off in the third period after blocking a shot off his left skate and Higgins falling in front of a Slava Voynov point shot to preserve Cory Schneider’s second shutout of the season and sixth of his career. He’ll make his fourth-straight start, a departure from coach Alain Vigneault’s usual plan to play both of his stoppers in back-to-back games.

On Saturday, it was also captain Henrik Sedin being crosschecked so hard to the ice by Jordan Nolan that the league’s may want to take a further look at the brutal play. And in a matinee where the top line was held to one shot as the Canucks mustered but 13 shots, they only gave up 20. And that second line of Mason Raymond, Schroeder and Hansen looked like a first line

“You need that,” said the Canucks captain. “A road game like this and the way we’ve played tight defensively lately, we confident being in these games. You need other guys to step up and they’ve been good for us. Mason has got great skills and that’s no surprise and for him to score a big goal for us was huge.

“When you play like this, you’re going to give up a few chances and if you do, you need your goalie to be there. If you give up a goal or two against these guys, then it’s a tough building to play in.”

The Canucks have gone from two games where they maybe weren’t expected to win to one that they should win, considering the Avalanche are sitting in the Western Conference basement and lost 4-0 in Dallas on Saturday. The Canucks blanked the Avs 3-0 in Vancouver on Jan. 30 and have won the last eight meetings with Colorado. If anything, the Avs do play well at the Pepsi Center with a 9-5-1 record while they’ just 2-10-3 on the road and 11-15-4 overall. Captain Gabriel Landeskog also missed the Stars encounter with a torso injury.,

“We’re getting scored on way too early and way too much right now,” Avs forward Matt Duchene said of being ranked 27th defensively by surrendering an average of 3.20 goals per game. “We’re playing catch-up all game long. It’s frustrating and we can’t afford to put ourselves behind the eight-ball every game.”

Raymond’s goal Saturday marked the sixth-consecutive game the Canucks have opened scoring and a three-game win streak since early February as they improved to 16-9-6. With the power play plummeting to 30th at 12.9 per cent efficiency and Edler out again today to finish off his two-game suspension for a major charging penalty Thursday for a collision with goalie Mike Smith behind the Coyotes net, Daniel Sedin and Jason Garrison manned the first-unit points Saturday in Los Angeles as the Canucks went 0-for-3. Any success there and the Canucks should triumph today.

bkuzma@theprovince.com

twitter.com/benkuzma

The Rock had several thoughts about the game tonight, though, and he wanted to share some of them.

1.)

Alright… who is this Jake Schroeder… Is no one else seeing Canucks.com @passittobulis @TheStanchion @jBowmancouver—
Nic Mayne (@nicmayne) March 22, 2013

Who is Jake Schroeder and what have you done with Jordan?? Or did the Canucks get a new set of Twins?? WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?

https://twitter.com/codecanuck/status/314972350783303680

IS RAYMOND JAKE SCHROEDER??

2)

Spaghetti is for winners, so The Rock is pleased Vancouver was able to eat pasta for two games in a row.

3) [View:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5cmmjjX4qg%5D

Alex Edler ran over Smith. This game was boring, don’t get The Rock wrong. At times it was downright putrid. But random things like Ballard playing forward, Daniel Sedin getting bloodied up by Mike Smith’s glove, and then Edler steamrolling Smith (Smith eventually left the game) all added up for kind of a fun night.

4) Perhaps the highlight of the night, was a commercial. That’s right, a commercial.

[View:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fRpJ_6LxMZ8%5D

Oh, where to start. The Rock was pretty sure this was some sort of Saturday Night Live sketch at first, but it turns out it wasn’t. This is a real website. This leads to many questions.

- When did “cougars” become 20 year olds?

- Why did the girl pump her fist and make a cougar noise?

- Why is there a tiny person at the end of the commercial peering around a monitor?

- Why does one of the people look like Michelle Rodriguez about to face down zombies in Resident Evil?

- Why is one dancing in a fountain?

The lyrics of the commercial for those wondering:

“She’ll make her moves, she’ll make you moan

But what she gives you, you better give it back

If you don’t you’ll end up as a tasty snack

Chorus

Cougar life in the city

Cougars are wild and they’re pretty (Insert screaming cougar and pawing motion here)

It’s cougar life in the city

It’s cougar life in the city (One last screaming cougar noise. No pawing motion, however.)

- If I’m reading these lyrics correctly, if the cougars satisfy you in the bedroom, and you don’t satisfy them back, they will murder you. This seems very bleak.

5) The Rock knows it isn’t a Canucks highlight but Marty Brodeur was credited with a goal, so you should probably watch it. Admit it, you’ll feel pretty cool when you’re at the water cooler at work tomorrow and you know what everyone is talking about when they mention Brodeur’s goal. The Rock says you’re welcome.

[View:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j5iQ6kjZojQ%5D

6) I couldn’t find a clip of Daniel driving to the net only to feel the glove of Mike Smith smacking him in the face, but I did find this picture which gives you the general idea of it:

That leaves us with The Rock’s final parting thoughts on the game. Rock? What did you think of the game?

With Zack Kassian (back) and Steve Pinizzotto (illness) already on the sidelines — and more crippling news with David Booth’s injury diagnosed as a high-ankle sprain that can have a recovery period of six to eight weeks — the Canucks summoned forward Andrew Gordon from the Chicago Wolves. The trickle-down effect is that a defenceman, likely Andrew Alberts or Keith Ballard, will have to play wing with just 11 forwards available.

“That’s going to be the case but I’m going to try and figure that out this afternoon,” said Canucks coach Alain Vigneault. “This just happened in a short span and we have a couple of hours to figure what we’re going to do.”

The good news is that Cory Schneider is coming off a strong 32-save performance Tuesday against St. Louis and that the Coyotes have lost four straight. They’re coming off a road trip in which they were blanked in three-straight games and went 245:33 before finally scoring Tuesday in a 3-2 loss at Los Angeles. But the Coyotes are 10-5-1 at home, have a way of playing well against the Canucks and won 4-2 at Rogers Arena on Feb. 26. If the Canucks are going to make something of this trip, their goaltending must be solid and their offence opportunistic because you can argue they’re only icing seven truly established NHL forwards tonight.

“It’s a tough game and never easy because they play with a lot of structure and energy,” said Schneider. “They may not have that big line, but they do have three or four lines that contribute. I know I have to be an integral part of the puzzle, regardless if we have a full lineup or a few guys out. My job doesn’t change and we have a lot of confidence in the guys we recall.”

Schneider was strong in a 2-1 shootout loss here last season at the trade deadline and also blanked the Coyotes 5-0 on their home ice in November of 2011. The Coyotes got a monster game from captain Shane Doan on Tuesday with 11 shots, 13 hits and a goal in 18:59. Now you know why the Canucks tried so hard to land him last summer.

Meanwhile, some confidence may be returning for Daniel Sedin, who went eight games without a goal before scoring Tuesday against the Blues. The winger had a long and animated post-practice discussion with Vigneault along the far sideboards. There was much head shaking, stick pointing and hand motions between the pair. What was the message to a guy with nine goals, just one more than Henrik Sedin?

“Nothing,” shrugged Daniel. “We usually have talks after every practice and it was nothing game specific. Last game was obviously a step in the right direction and I’ve got to keep that going. I’m at my best when I’m shooting the puck and I like to be the shooter on the line. I’m going to try and do that more.”

Daniel has actually been playing more like Henrik, thinking pass first and shoot second as a struggling sniper.

“That’s the tendency for everyone,” he said. “I’ve got to be more selfish and get to those shooting positions and that’s been missing.”

Gordon has played 49 NHL games — including 37 with the Anaheim Ducks last season and a dozen wit the Washington Capitals — and that made the centre/winger the logical recall choice over the highly touted yet untested Nicklas Jensen and Darren Archibald. Gordon has 16 goals and 26 points in 47 AHL games this season with the Chicago Wolves and brings versatility because he can play centre or wing on the third or fourth lines tonight. He was acquired from the Ducks in a trade for defenceman Sebastian Erixon last season. He didn’t arrive in time for the morning skate.

“He’s a real heart-and-soul kid and one of our captains,” Wolves coach Scott Arniel said of the 27-year-old Halifax native. “He plays the same way every night and every shift and knows what it takes to play at this level because he’s won a couple of championships at Hershey. He’s on our power play and penalty kill. We have him at centre but he can play the wing as well and he’ll bring a good work ethic. He knows how to play on the right side of the puck.”

bkuzma@theprovince.com

twitter.com/benkuzma

Best Sedin Look-a-like

Winner: Daniel Sedin

Why? After losing three years in a row to Henrik Sedin, Daniel finally pulled off the win. Although it’s hard to pinpoint why Daniel finally won, we’re pretty sure it’s because of better beard upkeep. Henrik got lazy, I think we can all admit that.

Best “I always liked that guy” award

Winner: Mason Raymond

Why? After two years of being absolutely crushed by fans and media alike for perceived poor play, Raymond is putting up great numbers this year. We’re pretty sure everyone knows a person who is now saying “I was always a fan of Raymond….”

Best Slap Shot Under 70 mph

Winner: Roberto Luongo

Why? Although Chris Tanev was figured to be a lock for this award, Roberto stepped up his game and really showed the power of a fiery sub 70mph slap shot at the skills event this year. There’s always next year, Chris!

Best “Walking a thin line” award

Winner: Mason Raymond

Why? Mason Raymond busted out his trusty spin-o-rama move this year in a shootout against Columbus and just barely kept the puck from going high when he roofed the puck backhand just under the crossbar. Had Mason Raymond missed an empty net like that, we don’t know what would have happened, but we’re pretty sure it wouldn’t have been pretty.

Best Steve Pinizzotto award

Winner: Steve Pinizzotto

Why? After two injury filled seasons with the Canucks, Steve finally played his first NHL game at age 28 against the Predators last week. That deserves an award, damn it!

Best Attitude From An Underappreciated Defenseman with the initials K.B.

Winner: Keith Ballard

Why? Do we even have to say it? If we were in Keith Ballard’s skates, we would have thrown several tantrums and trashed the press box by now..

Best Fighter

Winner: Tom Sestito

Why? Well, Volpatti is gone (disqualified) and Sestito’s 1-1-1 record is still better than Dale Weise’s 0-9 record.

Best Moment

Winner: Henrik Sedin becomes all time point leader.

Why? Who among us didn’t get all misty eyed when that happened? Besides, Cody Hodgson’s amazing goal doesn’t count because he was in a Sabres uniform (a decision that was almost overidden by us).

Worst Swedish Defenseman

Winner: Daniel Day-Lewis as Alex Edler

Why? You guys, he is a REALLY good actor. You had no idea that was him, did you? Watch his play in the defensive zone, then you’ll see it.

Best Goalie

Winner: Not even going to go there.

Why? There isn’t enough space in this paper to justify our decision.

So there you have it folks, some surprise winners and losers here, but that’s just the kind of luck the Canucks have when it comes to stupid, silly awards handed out by bloggers (the keyboards aren’t really gold. They’re chocolate).

That brings us to the game against the Blues. The Canucks, having lost two straight, and having their play best described as “Charlie Brown on Ice”, were coming in against a strong St. Louis team, which set up several fun storylines.

Storylines Heading into the Game:

- How would Dale Weise do in his new role as 4th line center? (Ebbett was scratched)

- How would Keith Ballard make use of his reprieve as he actually got to play after his bad mistake in Minnesota?

- Would Schneider outplay Jake Allen?

- Why does Jake Allen have two first names?

- Would Schroeder, playing on the 2nd line, have more of an impact?

- Seriously, two first names, that’s weirds me out

- Would Hansen’s hot play continue?

- Jake Allenforth? That would have worked as a name.

The Good

- Dale Weise excelled in this game, as not only did he penalty kill effectively, he also got a snazzy goal to boot! The Dutch Gretzky showed off some nice hands as he made full use of a great Schroeder pass to beat Jake Allen(forth) with a few dekes in tight. It was the kind of goal his agent will use any time contracts are brought up for extension. “Don’t look at any other play but this one. Dutch Gretzky. Am I right, or am I right?”

- Jordan Schroeder also played well, as the aforementioned pass to Dale Weise was a thing of beauty.  He spun off his defender and threw the puck over the Dale Weise and then let Dutch Gretz do the rest.

- The Sedins had a strong game, as they combined for a goal (they used to do that a lot) off a nice pass by Henrik. Jordan Schroeder thought the pass was “ok” but that his was better.

- Daniel Sedin, who scored tonight, apparently got a bit of confidence from that goal. All of a sudden he was Dr. Dangles out on the ice, dropping the puck between his legs, going through other players feet, and trying all sorts of fancy stuff you normally only see in an all-star game or in Tier 12 roller hockey where one player is so much better than the rest of the guys, it’s obvious he’s a ringer, and that team should be kicked out of the league, because let’s face it, that’s cheating, and if we allow that kind of thing, then where do we stop? Planet of the Apes. That’s where we stop. Where was I again?

- Cory Schneider gave AV the goaltending he wanted, as he kept the Canucks in the game in the first, and then played solid the rest of the way. The only way St. Louis was able to beat Cory was by hitting players in the chest and face with the puck. I am not joking.

The Bad:

- Zack Kassian got into a scrap in the first, which got the crowd into it. The bad? He hurt his back at some point in the first period, and did not return. Something tells me Dr. Recchi’s advice of “down 10 advil and suck it up” probably wasn’t the best medical advice for Kassian to take. No word on whether Zack will be on the Canucks road trip.

- The Canucks powerplay continued to not score, but at least they had a few chances? At this point even a shot on net is considered a win for the Canucks on the powerplay I suppose. Still, Jason Garrison was at least on the point! But he didn’t hit the net. But he wanted to! I hope. I can’t talk for him. He might hate the net, what do I know.

- Lapierre’s line struggled for a lot of the night. Pinizzotto did not have the strongest game, and Lappy didn’t make nearly enough biting finger gestures for my liking.

The Ugly

- Jannik Hansen and the Canucks took full advantage of a Blues delayed penalty with about 4 minutes left in the game by playing keep away with the puck for around a full minute. Why is this ugly you ask? Because for any other fan of a team watching, they would have been SO angry watching the Canucks kill the clock by playing keepaway. It’s like playing someone online in NHL 13 and watching them keep the puck in their own zone, trying to eat up the clock. The crowd loved it, and the Canucks even got a Raymond and Bieksa 2 on 1 almost goal out of it (which would have made the crowd go nuts), but yeah, any St. Louis fan was probably punching holes in his/her TV at that point. As a Canucks fan, though, that was freaking hilarious

- Chris Tanev took a shot that look liked it hit him in the jaw, and dropped him to the ice. Worse? The Blues scored off of the rebound. It’s not often people score on a rebound off of your face. Tanev left the game and didn’t return. Dr. Recchi will be all over this one. “Ice it down, 10 advil, and 2 beers. Suck it up, Tanev!” DON’T LISTEN TO HIM CHRIS!

- Tom Sestito, the Nacho Man, got into a fight with Ryan Reaves of the Blues. The fight was a draw, but after the fight, the two spent around 1 minute arguing back and forth from the penalty boxes. I assume they were arguing about who should friend who first on Facebook, but I can’t confirm that.

Final Thoughts:

A win is nice, but it’s just one game. This team is still fighting for position in this shortened season, so the upcoming road trip should tell us a lot about what the Canucks plan will be at the trade deadline. AV can rest easy for one night, at least, as the axes will be stowed away for now.

P.S. All I want to say is that if the Canucks are going to make a run, why not give Raffi Torres a call? Nobody celebrates a goal like that man did. NOBODY.

The Canucks are some kinda blunderful

Alex Burrows scored just six seconds into the first period, setting a new team record for the fastest goal to begin a game, and he would score again late in the third period, but by then it didn’t matter as Vancouver fell 5-2 to the Detroit Red Wings at Rogers Arena.

The Canucks’ power play continued its funk. It went 0-for-6, including a 1:20 five-on-three in the third period that went to waste, and hasn’t scored in 11 games.

“Obviously it’s not working,” said head coach Alain Vigneault. “And that would be an understatement. And those are our top players.”

Roberto Luongo, making his third straight start for Vancouver, has now allowed 13 goals in his last six periods against the Red Wings.

Not even the retro look of the Vancouver Millionaires’ jerseys could help.

“It wasn’t because they played great, it was us having turnover after turnover and it started with our line,” said Henrik Sedin.

“Me (and) Danny has to be a lot better. We had a good first period…but after that we started to make plays where we shouldn’t have made those plays and that’s where it turned around.”

Many of the fans in attendance hadn’t even taken their seats when Burrows scored, blasting home a pass from Daniel Sedin on a two-on-one that formed in the neutral zone almost immediately after the opening faceoff.

It was one second off tying the record for quickest goal ever scored in NHL history.

The Canucks actually outshot the Red Wings 16-6 in the first 20 minutes of play, but went into the intermission in a tie game thanks to Justin Abdelkader’s goal just past the six-minute mark.

“Their goalie played really well in the first period,” said defenceman Kevin Bieksa, referring to Jimmy Howard, who made 33 saves in the win.

“That’s a period you feel like you should be coming out of it up three-nothing. The shots were heavily skewed in our favour, we played really well and they came back in the second.”

Despite coming out of the first period tied, the Canucks appeared in decent shape.

They killed off a 1:16 five-on-three Detroit power play in the second period. The Red Wings came to Vancouver with the 30th-ranked road power play in the NHL, with only two goals in 43 opportunities.

The best chance actually went to Burrows, who got a breakaway almost straight out of the box, but had the puck skip off his stick as he went to make a move.

The Red Wings would, despite being unsuccessful in an earlier two-man advantage, get their power play working and the game turned against the hosts.

With Canucks captain Henrik Sedin in the penalty box, Henrik Zetterberg gave the Red Wings the lead.

As the Canucks penalty kill unit went into scramble mode following a rebound, Pavel Datsyuk hesitated with the puck ever so slightly to Luongo’s right and found a wide open Zetterberg, who hammered the pass into a wide open net.

Still, there were chances for the home team to get even.

Jannik Hansen was hauled down on a breakaway and awarded a penalty shot, but his wrist shot on the attempt rang off the post and into the mesh behind the net.

The Canucks came unraveled in the third period – against a team that was playing its second game in as many nights, and third game in four nights on the road.

Zetterberg added his second goal of the game and eighth of the season just 1:20 into the period, and Dan Cleary beat Luongo with a wrist shot from the top of the faceoff circle to give Detroit a 4-1 cushion.

Abdelkader notched his second of the night to round out the scoring for Detroit.

“It’s disappointing. We had a good first half of the game,” said Luongo.

“I thought we were taking it to them and we were still tied but things kind of fell apart in the third period and I’ve got to put myself in the forefront of that and make some big saves to keep it a one-goal game there.”

The loss means the Canucks, with a 13-8-6 record, are now tied with the Minnesota Wild – winners over Colorado earlier in the day – for the top spot in the Northwest Division at 32 points.

If the playoffs were to begin tomorrow, the Canucks would be seventh in the Western Conference.

The Canucks and Wild meet Monday at Rogers Arena.

Alex Burrows buried a one-timer off the post and past Jimmy Howard. The setup came from Daniel Sedin. Dan Hamhuis also earned an assist on the record-setting goal.

Amazingly, in six seconds, all five Canucks touched the puck on the play.

The Canucks, wearing their new Vancouver Millionaires jerseys, sure looked like a million bucks at the start of the game.

It didn’t last. They got spanked 5-2 by the Wings.

Burrows opening goal was 4th fastest scored in @NHL history to start a game. Doug Smail, Bryan Trottier and Alex Mogilny (w BUF) each @ 5sec—
Vancouver Canucks (@VanCanucks) March 17, 2013

Alex Burrows scoring in 6 seconds is the fastest goal scored in @VanCanucks history. Previous record was 9 seconds in '94 #Canucks—
Vancouver Canucks (@VanCanucks) March 17, 2013

GOAL! 6 seconds in, Alex Burrows scores! Assisted by Daniel Sedin and Dan Hamhuis #Canucks #VanMillionaires—
Vancouver Canucks (@VanCanucks) March 17, 2013

The Millionaires sweaters are a nice tip of the cap to the 1915 Cup champions and to hockey history. Well done @VanCanucks. #hockeynight—
Stephen Harper (@pmharper) March 17, 2013

Related articles

• Canucks will look like Millionaires against Wings, hope to play like them (vancouversun.com)
• Vancouver’s only Stanley Cup-winning team back in business? (o.canada.com)

No canned responses about “working hard”, “winning the battles” and “taking things one game at a time” (Canucks, it’s okay to admit you’ve got Red Wings on the brain. We all do.). I would love it if there was a bit more colour in those interviews and players said what they were really thinking.

Stuff like this:

NASHVILLE PREDATORS:

Head Coach Barry Trotz – “I notice the Canucks still have the same coach too. The Ruffster is out of Buffalo, looks like our coaches ironman pact still has some life in it”.

Pekka Rinne – “THIS BUILDING IS HAUNTED!!”. (runs away screaming)

Mike Fisher – “This is definitely a tough loss, you know. If only I had a gorgeous blonde to lay down on top of to make me feel better… do you guys want me to continue? Cause it’s about to get pretty graphic.”

Sergei Kostitsyn – “I still think our strategy last year was better. We have problem? Throw more Kostitsyns at it!”

Shea Weber – “It was weird, that slap shot of mine has killed men before. How did that Tanev guy survive?”.

VANCOUVER CANUCKS:

Head Coach Alain Vigneault – “Henrik’s move was… okay. Edler is still my guy when the shootout comes. His staunch refusal to deke in either direction is a real difference maker.”

Roberto Luongo – “I’m actually just going to head back to the ice and wait in the crease until Saturday. That good with everyone? Sweet”.

Cory Schneider – “I think whoever had their mask finished first should start on Saturday. That’s the only fair way to do it in which I will win”.

Henrik Sedin – “I do not get what is so hard about shootout. I move, goalie moves, I move again, goalie moves again, I move to where goalie isn’t and slide the puck in the net. Seriously, it’s 1 on 1 out there!”

Daniel Sedin – “Mess with me once, I’ll let it slide. Mess with me 84 more times? I’ll let it slide. But if you mess with me for an 85th time, I will punch you in the face. Tonight was that 85th time.”

Alex Burrows – “The biggest come from behind Rocket Richard trophy win is just about ready to kick in. Prepare for a ‘goalvalanche’. I’m gonna work on that name too, cause that…really sucks”.

Mason Raymond – “I bet all you people are falling all over yourselves to kiss my skates after how well I’ve been playing. See what I did there? I can make those jokes too… bitches”.

David Booth – “I’ve been saying this for weeks: My shot is fine, it’s the goalies that are the problem”.

Chris Tanev – “I lead the NHL in “walking it off”. Tonight was just another chance to pad my stats. Tell me, was that a gentle summer’s breeze or a Shea Weber slap shot?”

Kevin Bieksa: – “I know I didn’t look too good out there tonight, but what is coach gonna do, replace me with Ballard? Bwahahaha!”

Alex Edler – “So… that goal means I’m off the hook for all the crap I’ve been pulling in my own end, right?”

Maxim Lapierre – “I only took that penalty to get behind their defence unsuspecting-like. Totally worked. Just like we drew it up”

(He’s got his own magazine!)

Follow j.Bowman on twitter (@jBowmancouver). Was that too demanding? Okay, I’ll try to take more of a lighter stance on it: Maybe, I dunno, if you’re not busy on anything… you might like to follow j.Bowman on twitter?

Laurence Gilman, the Canucks’ assistant general manager, said something pretty interesting in a piece recently written by Elliotte Friedman at CBC. ca.

“Believe me when I tell you,” Gilman said, “there are percentage results that allow you to coach and manage your team to hedge bets in certain events.”

It’s not a big secret that the Canucks have run with some interesting applications to theories with the help of forward-thinking Gilman and general manager Mike Gillis over the last three seasons. These changes have been reflected both on and off the ice.

The problem with that thinking, however, is that being a successful bettor requires an awful lot of patience, in a hockey market concerned with winning immediately in a shrinking window. The Canucks fell a few bounces short of the Stanley Cup in 2011 and have been working for the last two off-seasons to duplicate that success.

While there’s sound reasoning behind the depth moves the Canucks have made, there’s been no clear attempt to amend the top talent of the team. The issue that Gilman and Gillis are going to have to deal with sooner is that Henrik and Daniel Sedin are 32 years old, and likely not point-per-game players.

The power play and goaltending, two positions of strength for the team since 2007, have been underwhelming to start the season. The most pressing concern is the power play, which was third worst in shots taken per 60 minutes after the March 6 update on the excellent hockey resource Behind the Net.

What has been the Canucks’ power-play credo in the past is that they’ve not only worked successfully, but also efficiently. There’s a difference between taking the full two power-play minutes to score, and scoring in the first 45 seconds of a man advantage as the Canucks were wont to do during their incredible run in the 2011 season.

That year, they scored 9.3 goals per 60 minutes at 5-on-4, or .31 times per two minutes. This season, they’re down to 5.2 goals per 60 minutes, or .17 per two. That could be somewhat excusable if the team was generally running into goaltending walls on the power play, but generally it has been a problem with entries and possession, not puck luck.

On the goaltending front, Vancouver’s tandem of Cory Schneider and Roberto Luongo, who should be a top-five goaltending tandem, were 11th in team save percentage after Friday’s games. Stanley Cup-winning coach Darryl Sutter has called save percentage “one stat that doesn’t lie” with regard to the struggles of his Kings goalie Jonathan Quick earlier this season.

That’s the issue with the Canucks’ method. While waiting for all the pieces to click – like Mason Raymond and David Booth, who showcase an ability to take shots – Vancouver may be neglecting the core pieces that kept the team competitive back during the Dave Nonis years.

You can look at Vancouver’s bottom nine and admire the work that went into putting together a group of players who can all, for the most part, push the play forward. The problem is that there isn’t anybody in the minor-league system or in the bottom nine who can reasonably expect to replace any of the twins’ production.

- The St. Louis Blues are looking for a right defenceman to play with Alex Pietrangelo, which has brought Edmonton Oilers blue-liner Ryan Whitney into the picture. But the Carolina Hurricanes are really searching for a defenceman with Joni Pitkanen (groin injury) not coming back any time soon.

- I would never doubt the esteemed Kevin McGran at the Toronto Star, but when he says Toronto Maple Leafs centre Tyler Bozek – who’s due to be an unrestricted free agent this summer – could make between Mikhail Grabovski’s $5.5 million and Ryan Getzlaf’s $8 million a year, I say, “What? You’ve got to be kidding.” Then again, we’ve all seen how stupid NHL owners are; they can’t help themselves with contracts. By now, we know the Leafs vastly overpaid for Grabo, feeling he had some offensive juice. Bozek, by pretty much every measure, is no better, no worse than Sam Gagner, the Oilers’ restricted free agent centre who is in his sixth NHL year and makes $3.25 million. If Gagner gets a raise for next season, it’ll be in the $4 million- to $4.5-million range. And Bozek might get $6 million? Vancouver Canucks star Henrik Sedin makes $6 million, folks.

- Former Oilers winger Robert Nilsson is apparently dating Nikolai Khabibulin’s daughter, Sasha. Nilsson, who played some games in Russia this season, has been seen around Rexall Place.

- Every NHL team is looking at the salary cap dropping from $70.2 million to $64.3 million and wondering where to cut corners. They all have one or two get-out-of-jail buyouts: No. 1 candidate for one: Buffalo’s Ville Leino. He did nothing last year and has hip problems this season. Three more years at $4.5 million.

- Kudos to Columbus Blue Jackets head coach Todd Richards for keeping his club going through terrible run of injuries. New GM Jarmo Kekalainen might want his own guy next year, but Richards has proven a point. His team is always ready to play and gives superior teams all they can handle. And that 4-3 shootout loss to Columbus doesn’t look so bad now that they also beat the Canucks.

- The Winnipeg Jets aren’t saying anything publicly about NHL realignment, but consider they had no road games in their time zone (Central) last season because they took over for the Atlanta Thrashers in the Southeast Division (Washington, Tampa, Carolina, Florida). They’ll now be in division with Minnesota, Chicago, St. Louis, Nashville, Colorado and Dallas. There’s been much bleating about the unfair advantage the Western Conference teams will have (two seven-team divisions, which means four out of seven make the playoffs, where it’s four out of eight in the East), but the disparity in travel miles in West should, I’d say, offset the tougher odds to make the post-season in the East. We all know the Jets and Detroit (moving to the East) were paramount in realignment, but apparently the league also knew that if Columbus didn’t get in an Eastern grouping with Pittsburgh and Philadelphia and the Rangers, their long-range survival was at stake.

- Anaheim Ducks captain Ryan Getzlaf is a great player — he helped Canada to a gold medal at the Vancouver Olympics in 2010 — but he will now be making $2 million more than the Sedins in Vancouver. I know Hank and Danny took hometown discounts to re-up in Vancouver, but doesn’t this seem a little off-base?

- One thing about New York Rangers GM Glen Sather: he never forgets a face. He traded for Roman Hamrlik when he was Oilers GM, giving up Bryan Marchment and Jason Bonsignore when Hamrlik was in Tampa. Now that the defenceman is on his last legs at 38, he picks him up for the Rangers on waivers.

- Everybody touted Zack Kassian as a big help for the Canucks (big, young top-nine forward with some touch), but he hasn’t scored a goal in 16 games after getting five in his first seven.

Not sure he’s the White Knight the Canucks seem to need right now, but Keith Ballard is back and is expected to play in tonight’s suddenly big game against the Minnesota Wild.

With a win tonight, the Wild will tie the Canucks and take over the lead in the Northwest division with more wins overall.

Maybe that’s why the Vancouver guys called a meeting before Saturday’s practice.

“We had a meeting with the players and you could see that our team is very even keel,” David Booth said. “We don’t get too high after a win, and when we lose a game against Columbus, you can’t get too down. Otherwise it becomes a roller coaster all year.

“I’ve been on teams like that before. You win a game, and it’s like winning a playoff game. Then, you lose and it’s the end of the world. You know, change everything.

“The players here do a very good job of saying ‘Hey, there’s no need to panic, things will start to come.”

A loss tonight may not be the end of the world, but you can at least begin envisioning it. It would mark the halfway point of the season and the Canucks would no longer be in sole position of first place in their division.

With only 24 games left, you’d have to at least start thinking about what seems like an inconceivable notion and that’s the possibility the Canucks would not make playoffs.

Crazy, right?

“We knew this season was going to be a race and it is,” Daniel Sedin said. “It’s lot of fun. It’s going to be like a playoff game tonight.”

With Ballard in, Cam Barker will be out.

Kevin Bieksa was on the ice this morning working on skating and puck-handling drills but head coach Alain Vigneault said he’s not ready yet to play.

Too bad. The Canucks could use him.

1. First-place showdown: Well it isn’t exactly a showdown in the classical sense because both teams are going sideways, but Sunday’s game in St. Paul has massive implications in the Northwest. A Canucks’ regulation win and they’re six points clear of the Wild atop the division standings. A Wild regulation win and the Minnesotans are just two points back with a game in hand. The stakes, at least, make this a compelling affair, especially for the two head coaches who are starting to feel some heat.

2. The dry season: Whether it’s the doldrums all teams face or a deeper issue, the Canucks’ offence has turned into Ice Station Zebra. Throw out the win over L.A. last Saturday and they have 11 goals over their last six games and the list of slumping forwards is long. Zack Kassian, no goals in 16 games. Alex Burrows, one goal in 10. Daniel Sedin, one goal in seven games. David Booth, no goals in eight games. Booth, at least, is producing shots on goal. He has 12 in his last three outings, which is a good sign. It would be better if one of them crossed the goal line.

3. Whither Alex Edler? Minus-two against the Blue Jackets. Minus-two against the Sharks. He’s now a minus-four on the season and the power play. of which he’s a big part, has gone south. When he’s on top of his game, Edler is a top-two defenceman on any team in the league and the Canucks desperately need him to play like that. Trouble is, he hasn’t played like that all season. The impending return of Kevin Bieksa might help but you’d hope Edler would take this on himself.

In case you missed it last week, I made Henrik and Daniel Sedin the “Plus” for the week. Hank had six points throughout the week and Dank had five. They shook off the apparent rust and started to break through. Through 21 games this season, the Brothers Red are tied for the team lead in points with 21.

Last week the defense got the dreaded “Minus” of the week. They were bad, how bad? They gave up five breakaways in one game. So bad it was like catching a football someone had rubbed in dog crap. Either way, they rebounded for two games where the Canucks were able to beat the Dallas Stars and shutout the Nashville Carrie Underwood’s, but they were absolutely destroyed by the Detroit Red Wings. Either way, there was a performance the last week that to me at least, made the defense look amazing. You’ll see.

The Plus

It was close to another co-plus kind of week, but the play of Chris Higgins this past week put him slightly over the top.

Higgins who enjoys doing sit-ups, counting his wads of money and fending off the women of Vancouver had a bit of a rough start to the season, but has recently hit his stride. Maybe it’s because he’s got a sweet beard or maybe it’s because he stopped using butter on his abs and started using I can’t believe it’s not butter spray. Whatever the case is, Higgins has been hot. He’s recorded points in four straight games (3g, 1a) and hasn’t been a defensive zone nightmare. His game has really come together; in fact, he’s one of the few guys on the team who has been really great in all three zones. So, drink it, Chris Higgins, you’re the plus of the week.

The Minus

The good news is I’m not picking on the defense. They’ve been better as of late, still look a sleep at the wheel at times, but have been getting better. So, rather than come at the D with daggers for words I thought I would take a stab at the man who’s responsible for putting his best six skaters on the ice. The man who single handedly saved the lozenge industry.

Alain Vigneault

You don’t have to be an OG Mack or a wannabe playa to know that on most nights Keith Ballard will be a better defenseman than both Cam Barker and Andrew Alberts. But, I’m buzzin’ because, this is how we do it – We talk about Barker and Alberts both getting into the lineup over Keith Ballard in consecutive games. As a fan of this team I’ve often scratched my head at a lot of it’s decisions, but this one really made me think either Keith Ballard is or has at one time kicked Alain Vigneault’s puppy, or he’s left a flaming bag of crap on his front door with the word “Coach” scrawled across it. Whatever the case may be, Ballard finds himself back in the million-dollar doghouse and warming seats in the press box. I don’t really get this, I mean, I get that Bieksa is out of the lineup again with an injury and the one game Alberts played before he didn’t play completely awful, but why Barker in against the Flames instead of Ballard, who has been actually playing pretty well this season?

So, for a rather milty decision over the week, Alain Vigneault, you’re the minus this week. Drink it, big fella; you’re in a prestigious club.

Thanks for reading, everyone, have a good day!

- Mitch