It’s a special edition of Eye Candy Friday dedicated to “The L Word”.  For those of you unfamiliar with the show, it was a Showtime series about lesbians that ran for 6 seasons.  I absolutely loved it, except for one thing.  It didn’t exactly portray lesbians in a realistic light.  For one, they were all lipstick lesbians…even the butchy one (Shane) and the fattest person on the show was Kit (straight/secondary character).  Granted when they introduced Max, a trans FTM that evened it out a little.

Oh well…if they weren’t hot I couldn’t do a blog post about it…

Rachel Shelley

Helena started out as a really controlling rich bitch when she came onto the show (not an original cast member) but once her eccentric mama cuts her off she becomes relate- able and frankly more human.  Plus she had a sexy accent.  Mrow.

Best Quote:  “The desperate… what?”  (After a straight woman references “Desperate Housewives”)

“

Jennifer Beals

Main character (arguably) Bette Porter.  Self-involved, selfish, a control freak and perfectionist.  A bit of an elitist snob.  Sometimes I loved her for her sarcasm and the way she’d put things when she was pissed.  “F*ck you Jenny Schecter.  F*ck you.”  Oh sure, she cheated on Tina and you had to hate her for that but then Tina started dating a man and that seemed to even things out with the gay audience.  I know, I know.  Still.

Best Quote:  “This is Los Angeles. There are same-sex families on ever f*cking street corner! She was born in this f*cking hospital, and both of our names are on the f*cking birth certificate! So, why don’t you just give us a f*cking break you straight, bureaucratic maggot, and get our daughter to see a God damn doctor! Please?”

Laurel Holloman

Tina Kennard.  Bette’s significant other.  I have a love-hate relationship with this character.  I’m glad they ended up getting back together in the final season.  Tina went from being a weak willed woman who relied far too much on her SO into someone who could stand on her own to feet and be her own person instead identifying solely as someone’s spouse.

Best quote:  ”‘…Bette…’Hey poor tard! How’s your two moms you big gay-mo?’”  (After Bette suggests a combination last name of Portard)

Leisha Hailey

Hated her at first.  Alice, (as Dana so aptly put it) was trying to have her cake and eat it to.  Oh that storyline where she dated that guy who was a lesbian.  Yeah, not a guy who joked he was a lesbian trapped in a man’s body like most straight guys say (so clever).  He was a man, who called himself Lisa and acted like a woman.  I don’t know when I started liking her so much…maybe it was because she was sleeping with Dana and it was kind of cute.

Best quote: “Oh no, I cannot take Cruella DeVille this morning. Do something… uh… pretend I’m upset.”

Erin Daniels

We already know I have a huge crush on Erin Daniels.  I loved her character Dana and was PISSED when she died.  I think most fans were, just because it was so easy to understand the character.  Her fear of coming out to her parents, the fear of being famous and out.  Oh my God, her first crush on the “soup chef” was so adorable and she’s so lame about the whole thing.  Reminds me of me, actually.  Except she’s much hotter.

Best quote, “Don’t look at me like that.  I don’t want to have sex with you and some woman.  I’d rather just have sex with the woman.  I’m that gay.”

Lauren Lee Smith

The Sou Chef, Lara Perkins.  Dana’s first girlfriend.  H-O-T.  I have had a crush on Lauren for AGES, I just think she’s perfectly lovely.  I loved her in “Pathology” where she went from being sweet and aggressive to being evil and murderous.  I still found her attractive, does that make me weird?  It probably does.  I got to see her in a Canadian flick, “Lie with Me” which is completely and unabashedly about sex.  You see her naked, a lot.  Kind of shattered the illusion for me, since she was so boney and whatnot.  I think several times throughout the movie I yelled “EAT A DAMN SAMMICH!” at the TV.

Best Quote:  “You could kiss it and make it better.”

Katherine Moennig

Oh Shane,  you heart breaker you.  I normally don’t like the manlier girls, and Shane is very guyish…but she’s The Fonz.  Women can’t resist Shane…straight or gay you are powerless against her charms.  You kinda had to hate her for dating Jenny in the final season though.  You want to just shake her or slap her silly…and then make out with her… ….ahem.

Best quote:  “Spaghetti girls.  Straight until wet.”

Elizabeth Berkley

Only appearing in 4 episodes is Kelly Wentworth.  She’s hot.  In that I’m-crazy-and-will-stab-you-if-you-call-me-Jessie-Spanno-love-you-forever-never-leave-me-I-will-stalk-you sort of way.  What?  That’s a type of hot.

She doesn’t get a quote…only 4 episodes, she never said anything memorable, just catty.

Mmm non-lesbian lesbians.  Oh, except for Leisha.  Mmm lesbian-lesbian.

Okay okay one more…not with the theme but Cortejo brought this to my attention and it was enough that even Smelly Guy had to come in for a closer look.

Hot Hot Hot!

She’s a Judo champ.  She’s a model.  She’s freakin’ hot.  We don’t know her name, but I would let her rough me up any day of the week.

Vill bara dela med mig av den här fina musikvideon – First Day Of My Life med Bright Eyes. Videon är regisserad av John Cameron Mitchell (Hedwig and The Angry Inch, Shortbus). Kärlek!

Just det, Daniela Sea, som spelar Max Sweeney i L-Word figurerar också i videon!

/Bobbi

By now you can see several more interrogation tapes from the last season of The L Word.

First up was Tina being interviewed by totally underused guest star Lucy Lawless. Now you can also enjoy Shane, Helena, Niki and Max confessing things we couldn’t have thought of in our wildest dreams.

But who am I to complain. At least we get a bit more of the gorgeous and horribly underused Lucy Lawless as Sergeant Duffy. Have a look.

This press release was first published March 15th 2009. MsQueer is pleased to be one of the sites that will be providing updated information regarding this exciting event as it becomes available!

The Convention will be held in Sydney on the 22^nd to the 24^th January 2010.  

“It is a privilege to be able to hold a Convention of this stature in Australia in particular for the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community” says Executive Officer for United L Events, Julie Anderson.  “The L Word’s large and loyal fan base is passionate about the show and its characters, as evidenced by the expressed interest to attend and previous Conventions held abroad, they are excited about the prospect of attending this inaugural event.”

Anderson said “The L Word Down Under Convention will provide an opportunity for fans to get up close and personal with the actors from the show.” ” Fans will be able to ask the actors of The L Word a question about themselves or the show, be photographed with their favourite actor, have a chance to get their autograph as well as meet other attendees from across Australia and abroad.”

In six seasons, The L Word has generated a devoted audience as well as critical praise for its provocative, sexy storylines, and the outstanding performances of the principal cast.  The groundbreaking series follows a group of Los Angeles based friends as they navigate careers, families, friendships, inner struggles and romantic entanglements.   Since its debut, the series has become part of a global popular culture, generating its own social networking site (Ourchart.com), dedicated fan web sites and blogs, together with L Word ancillary products.

Further details about the Convention visit http://www.thelworddownunder.com/ 

-MsQueer.

©2009 MsQueer.com. All rights reserved. (NOTE: Contents of Press Release sole property of  United L Events and The L Word Down Under.)

Stumble It!

Just in case you weren’t frustrated enough by  The L Word’s final truncated season (only 8 episodes), with the cheap way creator Eileen Chaiken chose to create a “murder mystery” storyline running through the entire season (unbeknownst to the actresses themselves), and the ultimate question of  “Who Killed Jenny Schecter?” remaining unanswered in the final moments….you have still another chance to want to throw shoes at your TV set (or, at least at your laptop or PC) by watching ShowTime’s post-mortem exclusively released on the ShowTime L Word website “Interrogation Tapes. “

We are enticed to watch for a new suspect every Monday. Woo-Hoo!

So far, these torturous clips (for those watching, not the characters being interrogated) have taken most of the characters to new lows.

There’s Shane the pyro, who apparently set fire to her own shop; Bette, who in one of the wussiest moments I’ve seen her in so far, proclaims her angst at Tina not asking if she (Bette) wouldn’t want to give birth to their second child, and Tina sharing how her sister used to have sex with her when they were children, thus relegating Bette to being her “second” as opposed to her “first” female lover- as she has maintained all along.

What’s really sad is that these “confessions” seem totally out of context and betray the actresses, not to mention what they have established with their characters over the prior 5 seasons.

On the other hand, Sgt. Duffy making a pass at Helena was playful, and …oops, too bad the male cop had to come back into the room to interrupt what might have been the Sarge putting a move on her suspect!

Now that “The Farm” is not going to be picked up by ShowTime, the whole reason for Alice being the prime suspect is really, well…suspect.

Too much cheap commercialism has clouded what could have been a strong finish for this milestone television show. Kudos to all the actresses who carried on their roles with grace and, well, of course…drop dead sex appeal.

You can view the carnage at http://www.sho.com/site/lword/interrogation.do

or, view them here if you can (if not pulled by Big Brother ShowTime already offering reruns by pay-per-view).

SHANE

TINA

BETTE

HELENA (my vote for most entertaining)

NIKKI

Max

You be the judge…. -MsQueer

©MsQueer.com. All rights reserved.

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According to AfterEllen, who got it from the Entertainment Weekly Variety, ShowTime Network Execs are no longer considering picking up the “L Word Spin-Off” The Farm, which featured Leisha Hailey, portraying Alice Pieszecki, in the pilot.

Apparently, the actresses had no idea as they were filming the final season that this huge “Murder Mystery” was going to involve the entire season. Afterall, they shot the episode with Jenny dying last.  Thank Eileen (series creator, Eileen Chaiken) and the Editing staff for the way it came out in the end – with us seeing Jenny being rolled out past the L Ladies in Bette and Tina’s living room in the first few minutes of the first episode aired of the final season. Then we had this whole ridiculous “Who Killed Jenny” B.S. culminating in….(drumroll)…..NOTHING!!!!!!!

Watched any of those interrogation tapes that ShowTime is running now? New material, shot at the time of the final episodes, and – quite frankly – pretty lame stuff. (So I can’t exactly say that I’m dissappointed that it wasn’t included in the actual epsodes, as some fans have suggested in comments.)

The REAL Murder Mystery is WHY IC MURDERED A GREAT SHOW WITH A BULLSHIT ENDING?????  The actresses and the fans deserved better.

R.I.P. The Farm? Maybe ShowTime Execs recognized that Alice murdering Jenny, which was the foregone conclusion with Alice landing in this form of prison, was too far-fetched for most fans to take. We as fans have been dealing with credibility issues from IC for 6 seasons now. Guess the ShowTime guys finally caught on. Well, at least we’ll have the DVD’s.

Now, let’s make the Movie dealing with something besides the “Great Mystery” – OK IC???????

Here’s the Variety Article as it appeared online yesterday:

Variety reports ShowTime passing on The Farm

 -MsQueer

©2009 MsQueer.com. All rights reserved.
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It should be no surprise that Daniela Sea is an OUT lesbian and…this week’s Eye Candy of the Week! Daniela Sea grew up in Malibu, California but home but left at age 16 to move to San Francisco where she joined several punk bands and learned improv acting. As a butch lesbian Sea says that she feels more comfortable in men’s clothing and even lived as a man in India for eight months.

“I mean, I definitely have only had significant relationships since I was 19 with women. And politically I’m definitely a lesbian, or a dyke, or on the queer spectrum…But I don’t believe that gender is just binary, and I never have, so that’s what pulls me to sometimes politically identify as a lesbian, because I’m a feminist, and I feel like women are still so suppressed.” (After Ellen)

Daniela is probably best known for her role on The L Word where she played Jenny’s androgynous lover who later morphed into transgendered Max. She can also be seen in John Cameron Mitchell’s feature film, “Shortbus,”( which swept the Cannes Film Festival in 2006), as well as Jamie Babbitt’s (“But I’m a Cheerleader”) “Itty Bitty Titty Committee” .

Alas, its beginning to settle in…the finality of it all (at least in terms of first-run episodes)…that is until the “Spin-off” and then the MOVIE (click here to Sign the Petition Now)…

Yes, that underlying sense of feeling “lost” I’ve been experiencing since the final crazy, frustrating, sexy episode 608 bringing down the curtain on the life of character Jennifer Schecter, portrayed by Mia Kirshner, and the History-Making/Herstory-Making  ShowTime Series The L Word is because I’m in mourning.

It’s not like the characters all died – just Jenny. (And, even as irritating as Jenny could be, and vindictive in the final season, I will miss her. I’ve always had a soft spot for the crazies, the tortured, and actress Mia Kirshner gave us one wild ride through a very complex character over the seasons!)

But I can’t shake the overwhelming sensation of loss.  Like I just moved away from all my friends. Call it quirky…and, no I don’t have difficulty distinguishing from fiction and “reality.” But as a Lesbian who has been out for over 30 years, I personally took on a sense of community as I have followed these lusty Ladies over the past 6 years. (Well, okay – so it’s actually been the past 4 years, because I didn’t discover the show right away.)

I didn’t gather with other Lesbians to view the show in a bar or someone’s home. I can’t even get ShowTime where I live (don’t ask)…so I’ve had to rely on the segmented posts of loyal fans at YouTube to see each new episode! Faithfully every week I’ve gone to the internet soon after 10:00 pm EST eagerly awaiting the first posts, so I could view the show.

I, like so many others, came to identify this circle of friends from West LA as a part of my life. I  joined in with them at The Planet, at Hit (renamed in the final season after Kit and Helena became owners of the She Bar).  I looked forward to looking into their lives – drama and all! – each week.

Maybe for me, it was because I don’t travel in a circle of Lesbians. I live in community with straight women and men dedicated to personal, professional and spiritual development. The focus here isn’t sexual identity. Although we’ve had Gays and Lesbians on staff in the past, and the organization is LGBT-friendly, I’m the only LGBT person here. So, because I live in a fairly remote location, 2 hours away from any city with an LGBT Center,  the gals of TLW were my “Gay Community” connnection.

The L Word isn’t just going to fade into the ethers. It’s become a Pop Culture Icon. There will be annual conventions, the DVDs, the “Spin-off” (although it will be a very different story line with just Alice as a carry-over) and potentially a movie on the wide screen – just imagine those Tibette Love Scenes! But I still feel like I’ve been abandoned. I still feel sad.

Maybe Creator Eileen Chaiken wrote the most irritating ending she could possibly have imagined just to help people through their grief – you know, leave them hopping mad and maybe they won’t feel their hurt so much? Who knows? The ending was pretty lame, like the whole season – but the sex scenes were sure great, weren’t they?

And Tibetters got what they wanted so desperately…Tina and Bette together, and OMG!! — HAPPY!!! (Well, as happy as you can be with a dead friend in your pool.) But, you get the picture.

I miss my friends. I’ll get over it and life will go on. I’ll keep checking YouTube for new videos from creative fans and post them here. And there’s always the DVDs and endless discussions on the message boards where fans gather to dissect episodes with amazing attention to detail!

Maybe I’ll go check out that LGBT Center. Who knows?

Here’s the Finale Special:

Funniest Quotes from Season 6

©2009 MsQueer.com. All rights reserved.

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1. An Op-Ed published by the New York Times last week has linked killer MRSA, also known as the  antibiotic-resistant “Flesh Eating Bacteria” to more than 18,000 deaths per year in the US. That’s more than AIDS. And what is the source of this superbug? You guessed it: cheap pig products. “Probably from the routine use — make that the insane overuse — of antibiotics in livestock feed. This is a system that may help breed virulent “superbugs” that pose a public health threat to us all.“

A small Dutch study found pig farmers there were 760 times more likely than the general population to carry MRSA (without necessarily showing symptoms), and Scientific American reports that this strain of MRSA has turned up in 12 percent of Dutch retail pork samples.

Now this same strain of MRSA has also been found in the United States. A new study by Tara Smith, a University of Iowa epidemiologist, found that 45 percent of pig farmers she sampled carried MRSA, as did 49 percent of the hogs tested.

And now with the NYT review of the Documentary “Death on Factory Farm” which is taking HBO viewers by

storm, I can only wonder how these animals that are smarter than dogs (yet some dogs chew delightfully on their dried ears & limbs) will fare int he coming months? And au contraire Mike Hale and the Wiles’s community, we can all eat veggies and thrive.

2. Bid on me! Help Farm Sanctuary raise some funds, and get a private brunch for two prepared by yours truly! Also bid on items from Bill Mahr, Amy Smart, Joan Jett, Chloe Jo, Daniela Sea, Heather Mills, Matt & Nat, Wendy Kidd, Dan Piraro, Gloria Steinem, Joelle Katcher, Rachael Sage, 30 Seconds to Mars, Maureen Burke, Gabrielle Brick, Dr. Joel Fuhrman, Nigel Barker, and more!

3. Is recycling really all that it claims to be? Have you ever been confronted by someone who is a total recycling skeptic and didn’t know what to say?

Read: “Recycling Is Too Difficult and 9 Other Obnoxious Myths“

Read the Economist article: “The Truth About Recycling“

Read: “ The Economics of Recycling“

Watch: William McDonough on ‘Cradle to Cradle’

Recycling is a tricky issue because it’s really a problem of over-production and over-consumption. But one thing is certain. We do not have infinite resources on this planet, and people who are in the industries that use up these resources, and are in positions to do something about it have a responsibility to figure out how to not leave devastated ecosystems for future generations. Just because the recycling systems aren’t perfect does not justify throwing caution to the wind and continuing ‘business as usual’.

The real issue is that recycling is not enough. Reuse is better, and ‘green’ products with toxic by-products need to be more thoroughly sourced, because there are products that come from closed loop systems, also known as EIN Eco Industrial Networking or EIP- Environmental Industrial Parks. But again, the root problem is still there.

One major problem is that recycling systems are often based on dollars as opposed to ecological and personal well-being. Dollars are abstract and when you work towards achieving such an abstraction (as opposed to working towards sustainability, good health, community, friendship, etc) the consequences to the physical world become secondary, when in fact ecosystems are primary and without functioning, healthy ones, we’d all be gone. The reason recycling appears to be useless to some people is not because re-rendering products into new products is impossible – it’s because they are seeing the effects of basing a recycling system upon a system that in itself is not sustainable.

Does that mean we shouldn’t recycle? Of course not! It means we should do that, and much much more! It also means the problems haven’t been solved and we need to get some serious critical thinking done.

Everyone who immediately turned their television off after the finale last night probably missed Leisha Hailey inviting us over to Showtime’s website for even more L Word.

More L Word you say? Why? How?

In the next couple of days the interrogation videos of all the characters present at Bette and Tina’s party in the last episode will go up on Showtime’s site. Would be a shame to waste all that precious work we didn’t get to in the finale, which was already over an hour long. And here is our chance.

First up is Tina Kennard being interviewed by totally underused guest star Lucy Lawless. Sergeant Duffy (aka Sergeant Lawless) is back and finally gets the screen time she deserves. In the video posted below we learn that Bette wasn’t Tina’s first, among a few other things. Have a look.

“Last Word” is the title of the very last episode of The L Word. So, “Last Word” as in last L Word or who has the last word? Let’s hope Jenny doesn’t come back from the dead to haunt us and have the last word. I’m quite glad she is shut up forever.

On a little side note, make sure to watch the special that aired with this episode after you have watched the episode. It works as an overall finale in a much better way (see closing comment at the bottom).

Okay, let’s get right to it. Shane is at the police station rambling on in her monologue about what’s been happening. Apparently Jenny was doing a tribute video for Bette and Tina. Why ever she was doing that after giving Bette hell for what she thought she saw her doing with Kelly is unclear. Another Schecter mystery? We are getting tons of them this season.

Jenny asks Shane to say something on the video, but all the while it’s Jenny who is doing the talking. And Shane is clearly not liking what she is hearing.

Jenny: “..with you guys leaving. You guys were the supreme, wonderful, beautific couple and now we are taking..we’re gonna take your place cos we’re the only ones left. So this is really, really exciting. So I give you my word that we’re gonna make it.”

Usually we would be saved by the horrid theme song, but we don’t have to shut our ears this time. Hopefully it won’t be the only highlight tonight.

We’re at The Planet where the Three Musketeers are having a serious chat for a change. Alice voices her love for Tasha and wants to know what is going on between Tasha and Jamie. Why they are having that talk in public is something I don’t understand. Anyone afraid of someone making a huge scene? Jamie reassures Alice that nothing happened and Alice points out that for Tasha “thinking is cheating” and given they have so much in common she assumes for Jamie too. To drive that point home both Jamie and Tasha ordered the same dish. Never mind that it’s totally generic food. Nothing special.

Alice: “Just be fucking truthful about your feelings. It’s obviously out of your control.”
Tasha: “I’m not gonna accept that.”

Jamie jumps in and professes her love for Tasha. Alice lets Tasha go, but Tasha doesn’t want to break up. It gets nasty and Alice gives Tasha an ultimatum.

Alice: “If you don’t call me by the same time tomorrow I know you have made up your mind about what it is you want.”
Tasha: “This is not… this has never happened to me before. Alice, you know that I live a life of honor and duty.”
Alice: “Well, I don’t want you to stay with me out of a sense of duty. Don’t stay with me because it’s the right thing to do.”

Damn right girl. She storms out, leaving the two mental cheaters with their twin food and drinks.

Now it’s Alice’s turn spilling her guts at the police station. Seems like coolest guest star ever Lucy Lawless is back. I might be mistaken, but given the depressing content of this finale so far I am grasping at straws for every possible highlight.

Alice confesses loving Tasha as much as she loved Dana. Oh Dana, why did they kill you off? Thank you writers for reminding us exactly when this series jumped the shark.

Jenny is at Helena’s house with her camera equipment. Dylan is there too talking with Helena, but unfortunately it doesn’t look nor sound as if these two have reconciled. Apparently Dylan got kicked out of her sublet without warning and needed to talk to Helena cos she was upset about the whole thing. Now Helena is upset with Dylan cos she thinks Dylan expects her to offer her to stay at Helena’s place.

Dylan: “I would have said no if you had offered. But it would have been nice.”

Yep, Helena, that would have been nice. And given the Helena we have known since season three she would have offered without thinking about it, glad to maybe get a chance to be close to Dylan again after the fiasco at the Jenny Wonka party. Yet another personality change? How many does that make now? I have lost count.

They both run into Jenny downstairs who wants to tape them for the Tina-Bette-tribute-video. Helena is reluctant to be in front of a camera. Given her history with present Dylan Moreland I am not surprised and it is one of the rare occasions where the writers seem to adhere to The L Word history. Might just be a coincidence but I would like to give them some credit. Doesn’t happen very often.

Helena has also turned into an alcoholic, fixing drinks which Jenny politely declines since it’s too early.

Max’s turn at the police station. Last time we saw Max he shaved off his beard after the Jenny Wonka fiasco. Now the facial parasite is back. At least this time it’s nicely groomed. Different look, but back nonetheless.

He talks about everyone being “framily” for him. I know it’s not like you have sworn on the book-of-many-contradictions (=the bible) and are under oath while questioned at the station, but this might be stretching the truth beyond capacity.

On to cooler locations. Like Bette’s house. I don’t know what Weezie, the crazy laughter contractor did other than wave her magic wand (get your minds out of the gutter) to get all that construction work on the second level done already. I want to hire her and her time portal in which time must go by so much faster and your construction time is cut in half. Awesome asset.

Kit asks Bette about their plans for adopting another baby. Bette isn’t too hopeful they will get another chance since they’re a same sex couple. Funny how the system will give babies to people that can hardly hold a job and pay rent, but don’t even mention the monstrosity that is a loving same sex couple with tons of money and successful jobs to them. I wouldn’t want to be adopted by such people either. Life would be hell. Anyways, Kit points to the obvious choice we have all been pointing and rolling our eyes at all season – Max, the Mom Dad next door.

Kit: “… he has something you guys want.”
Bette: “We’re not talking about fucking used cars, Kit.”

Damn straight gurrrrl. Enough about that though. On to more important topics like Bette and Tina moving to New York. Bette gives Kit a pretty good reason.

Bette: “I am so ready to get out of here. I’m so tired of everyone being all up in everyone’s business.”

She tells Kit about what Jenny thinks she saw. Reassuring her big sis that nothing happened with Kelly that night Bette would just be happy to “be getting out of this little incestuous hotbed of lesbian inter-fucking-connectedness.”

Kit is at the police station being interviewed by a male detective. Where did Sergeant Lawless go? Maybe it wasn’t her to begin with. Damn, there goes my one reason why I might like this episode. Kit tells the detective that he “will never find a group of people who love one another more and who look after one another as lovingly as friends do… they are so tight and fiercely loyal.”

Alice is going over the whole Tasha-Jamie-scenario with Shane. Thank God we have those two bestest friends back together. Their dynamic has been sorely missed.

It doesn’t take long for Alice to bring up Jenny and her relationship from hell that she is having with Shane. Shane is trying to explain to Alice why she feels honor-bound to stay with Jenny.

The whole thing almost erupts in a fight. Then we’re back with Alice at the police station saying something that totally resonated with me.

Now we are coming to the truth why Shane is staying with Jenny. Like many already suspected she is putting Jenny’s happiness above her own.

Shane: “If I was to walk away from this I think she’d go off the deep end, I really do. So it’s a choice between my happiness and hers. That’s how I see it.”

Wooow Shane. That is never a good choice. Because sooner or later you won’t be able to do it anymore and then she will seriously go off the deep end. And you have this new diving block next door.

On that note let’s go over to another couple going off the deep end. Helena and Dylan are not fighting anymore, but as soon as Dylan gets off the phone and wants to scrub movie night Helena gets suspicious. Who was that nobody on the phone just now? More importantly when did these guys make up after the last scene we saw them in? I’m glad they’re still together and Helena hasn’t thrown Dylan out, but what’s with the control freak girlfriend routine all of a sudden? Consistency zero.

Now it’s Helena’s turn being questioned by the police. I wonder whether her priors came up in conversation.

Helena: “I know it’s a cliché, but being rich is a curse. You don’t know what it’s like never knowing if anyone ever really cares for you or if they’re just with you for the money.”

At least these two make up and have make up sex. But I got really concerned for a second there when Dylan got a hold of that knife. I know trust is a big issue, especially for our Helena Peabody, but do we need to go to such extremes? Especially considering the tremendous personality changes that happen on this show. I feel like I have to thank someone for not turning Dylan into a killer and murdering the gorgeous Helena.

Disaster averted, or did we?

Jenny is editing her tribute video and we are privy to Helena explaining why she was such a bitch when her and Bette first met. Other than Helena fucking Bette’s ex. But here she talks about Bette always being the daughter that she could never be (remember season two and Peggy Peabody?!). How sexy is Rachel Shelley sucking on a lolli pop.

Phyllis and Joyce are part of the video too. Phyllis is reminiscing about when she first saw Bette and Joyce is going “to miss double billing [Bette and Tina]. My business is really gonna take a hit”. Just two lines, but Jane Lynch always manages to be memorable.

What the one sex scene started, the next one finishes. Tina is moaning at the top of her lungs while I’m seriously starting to pray that it is Bette between her legs. Hey, on this show you never know. As Tina’s attention shifts to the unfinished railing outside Bette’s head emerges and I can’t hold in my sigh of relief.

Tina immediately focuses her attention on the matter at hand (pun intended) and reciprocates. But Bette just wants to kiss. Not that anyone minds.

Bette: “Do you know what I would like to do when we get to New York?”
Tina: “What?”
Bette: “I’d like to marry you.”

Short interlude at the police station where Bette utters that Tina is the love of her life.

Next, Shane walking home. Nothing much to it really other than it being a nice nod to the end of the pilot, where the same scenario was happening. Bear with me here, okay? Shane walking home after a night out coming past Bette and Tina’s house, who are both sitting outside after having had amazing sex the previous night.

Bette: “What are you doing out so early?”
Shane: “Going home.”
Bette: “From?”
Shane laughs: “I can’t believe this is finished. It looks incredible.”
Bette: “Nice dodge.”

Like in the pilot all-knowing Shane brings up the whole you-just-had-sex speech.

I can’t be the only one reminded of the pilot ending here. Anyone?

The conversation shifts to Shane having been with Alice, who needed support thanks to the whole Tasha-Jamie debacle. Negating Bette’s impression that Shane was in her studio last night we find out Jenny is using it now for her video editing. Bette makes an observation.

Bette: “So Jenny is using the studio? I thought that was supposed to be your photography studio…. That Jenny gave to you as a gift so that you could have some place that was yours. And yours alone.”

Shane doesn’t want to reveal the video surprise and is dodging around the subject until Bette speaks her words of wisdom.

Bette: “I think [Jenny's] heart is in the right place. I think she just misplaced her meds.”

Truer words have never been spoken.

Finally we have proof that Lucy Lawless is back.

Tina is at the station now and what she is wearing is enough reason to arrest her in my opinion.

She talks about her moment of jealousy concerning Kelly, aka The Vixen according to Kit.

Back at Helena’s pad our British import is doing her damndest not to be paranoid and jealous while Dylan is on the phone with someone.

Everyone is on the phone right now. Shane is listening to Alice talking about Tasha and Jamie having sex, while both of them are chewing on something.

Jenny walks in with deadline panic. More tapes have arrived that need to go into the tribute video. And to top it all off she still has to buy editing software. WTF? What was she using when we saw the little tidbits of Helena and Phyllis and Joyce? I could clearly see editing software on her left screen. WTF?

The African American Family just waltzed into Bette and Tina’s kitchen. Oh wait, it’s Kit and Sunset with lil Angie returning from the Zoo. My bad.

Sunset has to change into his drag to go to work. Bette is not too happy having him use their bathroom cos he’s a man.

Bette: “What if he forgets to put the toilet seat up or something?…. I’m just not that crazy about the idea of some man in my beautiful new bathroom. Don’t look at me like that. I’m not a man hater. There are just so many facets of men that make me queasy…”

Just at that very moment James walks in and Kit asks him how he puts up with Bette.

Bette: “He never pees in my bathroom.”
James: “Nope. Never.”
Bette: “Right. Ever.”
Kit: “Where do you pee?”
Bette: “Powder room. Right?”

There is probably even a memo somewhere stating exactly that. Jeez Bette. Nice to see you again, James.

Shane comes to the rescue of deadline-panic Schecter, bringing among other things Final Cut. Jenny mentions that she would have probably killed herself if Shane wasn’t always helping out. She wants to leave everything to her. Get that in writing quickly, Shane. You never know when someone might bite the dust.

As Shane drives away Dylan walks into the studio.

Back at Bette and Tina’s house we find out that James is not coming to New York with Bette. She hasn’t offered him a job. Ouch. Thanks Porter. So many years under your reign for nothing. It’s not like you make it especially easy and comfy to work for you. But Bette actually has a reason.

Bette: “…I’m sort of liking the idea of Tina supporting me and me looking after the children.”

Everyone cracks up laughing. I’m totally with them. Bette, you wouldn’t last a month. Before we can get into the whole thing Sunset walks out in complete drag saying good-bye to everyone. Angie gets to deliver the real shocker this time.

Angie: “Bye Daddy.”

GASP!

Alice is playing with her toes while talking on the phone with Helena, who in return is needling and threading some clothes. What is happening with these ladies? When did Helena turn into a desperate housewife? I know she likes to cook but jeeez….

Helena finds out that Dylan is hanging with Jenny at the studio. According to Alice they are editing, but the jealousy and paranoia has risen to the surface yet again.

Meanwhile at said studio Dylan is asking Jenny not to reveal that she knew of the setup test with Nicki. Jenny of course won’t have it since she is on the honesty train this season. Helena walks in at the perfect line, thereby immediately knowing what is going on. Why do these two have to play games with each other? They are in love, they are great with and for each other. If only they could manage not to play mind games and honestly talk to one another. Jeezzz (how many jeezes does that make so far?).

Helena runs out, Dylan after her pleading to give her another chance. But Helena won’t have it.

The end of the Helena-Dylan relationship. What else is dying before the end?

Shane is buying a present for Bette and Tina and runs into Molly.

In their conversation Molly brings up the night she dropped off Shane’s jacket. She mentions the letter and Shane is clearly lost.

Shane: “What letter are you talking about?”
Molly: “The letter. It’s in the pocket of the jacket that I gave Jenny to give to you…”

Shane finally realizes what Jenny did and is capable of.

The party is in full swing at Bette and Tina’s house with Bette making a great entrance down the newly constructed stairs.

Alice is on a binge, Helena is not far behind. Tasha hasn’t called and Helena considers Jenny as “Kali, the goddess of destruction.” Very appropriate indeed. Everyone is hating on The Schecter to everyone’s amusement. Even Max joins in. Then Alice admits to wanting to make up with Jenny this evening and Bette suggests maybe everyone should give that a try. This sounds more like code for getting rid of the common problem. Or maybe that’s just me.

Jenny is in the house with Kit, readying the video for public display. They talk about the Kelly situation, which turns into the Jenny situation.

Jenny: “I can see that I am making everybody uncomfortable. I can see that my friends don’t want to be around me anymore. That they want me to shut the fuck up and go away. I just wana do the right thing.”

Kit argues that Jenny has no proof. Jenny brings out her iPhone, that apparently has a video not a photo on it.

Since when can you record video on an iPhone? Well crazy Jenny knows how it works. Damnit Jenny. Now I actually have a reason – one single reason – why I wish you weren’t dead. I have been trying to take a vid with my iPhone for hours and it’s not working. Jenny took that magical genius gift from heaven with her to the grave. Darn.

Fittingly enough we cut to Bette being questioned about Jenny by Sergeant Lawless.

Shane is rummaging through the house desperately looking for that letter Molly mentioned. As she enters the closet that leads to the attic music starts playing that for a few seconds sounds like cheap horror music. I almost expected Michael Myers to come in with his hockey mask and stab her. We finally find out what’s in the attic. No corpses or anything. Just the truth Shane has been dodging for so long.

And look what else is up there. The Lez Girls negative Jenny so vehemently denied having stolen.

Cut to Sergeant Lawless questioning Tina about the movie at the police station.

Bette is taking everyone upstairs to check out their newly constructed top level. Tina mentions that it’s not finished since their contractor bailed on them. Didn’t they mention not too long ago they will get Weezie to sort things out?

Tasha is back. On the screen that is. At the police station. Talking about Alice and her big heart.

Upstairs, in the newly constructed master bathroom Bette can’t help but divulge that she and Tina already enjoyed their new bathroom. These two are having sex as if their relationship had just started. Good for them. But I think there is also a rule that you need to have sex in every single room in your house before you can sell it. Did you tick everything off that checklist yet, Bette?

Kit stumbles upstairs wanting to talk to Bette. They end up yelling and screaming at each other. Kit adamantly convinced to know what she saw, Bette absolutely sure of what she did and did not do. It ain’t pretty.

Shane drags Tina next door. No doubt to show her the newly found, formerly missing Lez Girls negs.

At the police station Nicki is asking for a lawyer and Sergeant Lawless points out that none of the others have done so since “they really trust one another… they are very, very close and boy they are looking out for one another”. The point is driving home right into Nicki’s very core, drilling deep. Ouch.

Jenny wants to get started with her video cos it’s about three hours long. Holy hell, Schecter. That’s like the fourth part of The Lord of the Rings. People need serious warning and time to prepare for something like that. Most party guests are MIA but Jenny is going upstairs to get Bette. Kit didn’t warn her that Bette might not be in the bestest mood. It looks like a lamb is just going to the slaughterhouse.

To really drive the point home the two meet outside, where the railing has not been finishing and the dreadful pool of doom is looming below.

Bette: “My family and the life that I have worked so hard to rebuilt for them means everything in the world to me. And there is nothing I wouldn’t do to preserve and protect them.”

We get a repeat of Bette at the station talking about Jenny from earlier. Just a different angle. Running out of material?

And now for the real killer guest appearance or rather re-appearance on the show. Tim is back, aka Eric Mabius who was the luckiest son of a bitch to ever be written out of this show so he could sign up for Ugly Betty. They paid a little tribute to him in an earlier episode and now he re-appears.

Alice finds Shane sitting on the porch. She tells her that she is forgiving Jenny since Alice needs her friends now that she is alone. Shane tells her that they are no longer together. Guess Shane is finally coming to terms with Jenny’s treachery.

And we are back with Alice at the police station asking what is on everyone’s mind.

Alice: “What does this have to do with who killed Jenny?”

Sergeant Lawless immediately jumps to the “killed” part. Alice clearly feels trapped.

Cut to Bette running into Tina while looking after Angie. She wants to talk about something. Max jumps in, just having felt the baby kick for the first time. And Saunder is strolling around the edge of the pool.

Meanwhile on the video we have jumped from the Manny over Ivan (with a nice nod to NO ON PROP 8!) to Peggy Peabody and Jodi. They even have Marina back. But the best was saved for last.

Max suggests to pause the video since Jenny wanted to see everyone’s reactions. Alice, trying to be her friend tonight, goes to get her. Everyone else stays behind watching the video which functions as a good-bye to the viewers. Then Alice returns, hardly able to say “Jenny!”. Bette is the first through the door as we hear Jenny say “Bye Bette and Tina. I love you guys” on the video.

We cut to Sergeant Lawless arriving on the crime scene, just how we started out this season. Main difference being the cops dragging Nicki out of the bushes behind the pool.

Tasha arrives at the scene being allowed in because she is going to the Police Academy. Wtf? Never mind. We have abandoned realism a long time ago.

The video is still running in the media room.

Jenny: “You guys changed my life. Wow you really did. And I’m never gonna forget you. So thank you for everything. Okay. That’s it.”

And that is it as the gang arrives at the police station while the credits roll. Only one thought comes to mind – can’t they carpool at all? Shane, Max, Kit and Helena drive in their cars solo, the couples Bette and Tina and Tasha and Alice drive in their cars. Tight-knit group my ass. They can’t even share car space anymore.

Now the dreaded theme song makes its appearance albeit without lyrics while everyone is walking towards camera in different groupings, the last good-bye nod. Last but not least Mia Kirshner as the controversial Jenny Schecter bids us good-bye.

It doesn’t end with a bang as we had all hoped, but rather collapses into a sad little pile. Like other shows that I have been following for years until their very end – their last episode almost destroys the whole series. While I do not consider it as horrific as a lot of other people make it out to be, the final farewell could have been a lot better. A lot of people think of gay women as crazy. They usually get depicted as murderous, duplicitous and promiscuous niche characters on television. A show made for gay women by gay women should not have fueled that unfortunate mainstream misconception.

That being said, thank you Ilene Chaiken. We won’t forgive you all the crazy turns this show and its characters have taken over the past six years but we thank you for creating them and getting them on the air.

p.s. Guess I was right. Jenny did have the “Last Word”.

In closing I would like to point out that the “Last Word” on and about The L Word, the true series finale, is the special that aired with the last episode. Here we truly are leaving the series on a high note while looking back on the past six years. We are greeted by old friends long gone, revisit the ups and downs of our beloved characters and story lines and remember what an impact the show had and still has. Now that is what I call an ending.

see MsQueer’s “End of The L Word Tribute to “6 Wild, Wonderful, and WTF? Years” :

http://msqueer.wordpress.com/2009/03/20/end-of-the-l-word-a-tribute-to-6-wild-wonderful-and-wtf-years/

Many of us TLW fans have been discounting the “mystery” aspect of the “Who Killed Jenny Schecter?” season-long story line with the publishing (prior to the actual beginning of aired episodes, I might add) of the Leisha Hailey “spin-off” featuring the lead character Alice in prison. Hence the naturally assumptive conclusion: it was Alice?

That’s assuming that creator Ilene Chaiken is following a logical progressionfrom this The L Word to the new “spin-off.”

Okay now, fans – think about this. When in the last 6 seasons have we experienced IC to do anything remotely logical with the plot of this show? If Our Chart was still alive, you could go to any thread to witness the ranting and ravings of various character’s/actresses’ fan following with regard to IC’s latest ridiculous manipulation of the plot.

So now, in the last episode, we’re all anxiously awaiting and expecting…logic? Normalcy? Closure?

What a’ ya – NUTS?

Keep in mind, everyone has their eye on the MOVIE. Truthfully I wouldn’t put it past IC to have created some sort of weird dream sequence or some other plot twist to resurrect Jenny in the final moments. I mean with her, WHO KNOWS?????

Look at the promo for 608 from ShowTime. Almost looks like Bette takes a kitchen knife to go after Jenny. But look more closely. Not Jennifer Beals’ nose. (Hey, it’s a dimly-lit scene). Nope, it looks more like Dylan’s snotz. But again, these cleverly editted clips are probably not related as they are being presented in the teaser. They’re just a great tease.

Personally, I don’t think we’re going to find out. The actors all appear to not know in the interviews. Goddess knows, IC won’t knock off the people we’d like to lose..like Adelle, or William. 

Oh, and by the way… with one episode left, where exactly is Carmen supposed to show up? (Wasn’t she scheduled to return this season?)

More mystery… Sigh! 

-MsQueer  

©2009 MsQueer.com. All rights reserved.

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see MsQueer’s “End of The L Word Tribute to “6 Wild, Wonderful, and WTF? Years” :

http://msqueer.wordpress.com/2009/03/20/end-of-the-l-word-a-tribute-to-6-wild-wonderful-and-wtf-years/

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mo1r5UoBg1o

VIDEOS PROPERTY OF SHOWTIME AND THE L WORD. I OWN NOTHING!

Vote for who you think “Who dunit?” at

http://msqueer.wordpress.com/2009/03/08/who-killed-jenny-schecter-revealed/

It is almost over. Second to last episode – “Last Couple Standing”. I hope there won’t be a shoot-out and next episode will be called Dead Couple Walking.

We’re almost at the finishing line so it’s about time for a dance marathon. Nothing like shaking your booty, especially for a good cause. Bette is just signing up as Alice swaggers over as only Alice can, trying to find out what routine Bette has been working on with Tina. Let the mind games begin. It’s on!

Jenny heard that and immediately zooms in on Bette, wanting to talk privately. Then. The. Bomb. Drops. And Bette is not amused.

Bette gives Jenny a play-by-play of the whole Kelly encounter (see previous recap for details), but Jenny won’t let it go cos “Tina’s [her] friend.” Since when? You call everyone that wants to kill you a friend? Well, you are about to add another, Schecter. Saved by the amazing theme song.

Bette and Tina are backstage getting ready to dance their sexy asses off when Tina has some good news to spill – she was offered a job. Bette is overjoyed, yelling and dancing, calling Tina a “fucking rock star” until Tina spills some more details. Of course the new job, for Focus Features no less (wow), is in New York. Where else could it be? Hasn’t the whole LA vs. NY thing always been a big part of their relationship? Bette, again, is not amused. Alice drops in by removing the curtain from her changing room.

Tina doesn’t want to take the job cos their whole life is in LA. All their friends are there, Bette just opened a gallery and they are rebuilding their house – which brings Alice to talk about the birth mother moving into before mentioned house. She cites the film “Baby Mama” as analogy to their situation, them having to go through what Tina Fey’s character had to in the film. Alice mentions several obstacles until the pen ultimate:

Alice: “… or worse… one of you guys could end up having an affair with her.”

Seems like the two aren’t agreeing with you. I especially love Bette’s zombie eyes.

Bette points out she is “… not some fucking loose cannon that fucks everything that walks, okay. I can be trusted!” Who are you trying to convince, Bette? Alice or yourself?

Everyone is looking hot, sexy and adorable in their get-up.

On stage, Sunset Boulevard walks out to a cheery crowd. Tina approaches sulky Helena in the upstairs VIP lounge, telling her that Dylan loves her. “Then where is she?” That’s what we all would like to know Helena.

On stage Sunset brings up Jamie who introduces the “honorary co-chair” Alice Pieszecki.

Alice gives everyone the run down on what’s happened – the letter, her job loss, saving Marie and meeting Jamie – so everyone knows what the dance marathon is all about. They want to raise $250 000 for the youth center, asking for donors to please come up on stage. Bette jumps at the chance since Jenny is approaching her and Tina. Tina is a bit surprised, but Bette urges her on. Reason enough for a screen cap of these two lovely ladies.

Sunset gives Kit a smitten introduction and he gets something out of it – she asks him to be her dance partner for the evening. High five, man. Way to go.

Helena is ignoring Jenny’s apology as she marvels at Alice’s team consisting of three instead of two. Of course the three musketeers could not be separated by the triviality that are the rules of this dance-a-thon. They are able to get her out of her sulkiness and get her own number to participate. Jamie will dance with her, but I have a feeling she won’t need Jamie as a partner.

Kit and Sunset are still onstage doing their thing as well as pointing out the rules.

Sunset: “If there is no spring in your step… “
Kit: “… and no funk in your trunk…”
Sunset/Kit: “… you will… be…”
Ref (hopping on stage): “…eliminated!”

Wow, that guy got a full actor’s pay day for saying only one word. Lucky bastard.

And the marathon is a GO! Where is Dawn Denbo with her signatory “It’s on!”?

Bette is dancing with Tina, the three musketeers are dancing with Helena, Shane with her crazy Jenny and Jodi with an unidentified black-haired female. Bette, again, is not amused. I think I have already written this today. Déjà vu. Tina tells her to not let that ruin her night. I feel like someone else has that job already. Where is Jenny? Dancing with Jodi and the unidentified black-haired female. The lines have been drawn.

Bette is just about to tell Tina about the Jenny-thing when Alice crashes their conversation yet again. She has a weird feeling too. About Jamie that is. “Is Jamie acting weird?” Everyone tells her she seems fine, but come on Alice, you are finally on to it. Don’t lose the scent. But she immediately lets it go and swooshes back over to her girlfriend and friend. Bette tries her talk with Tina as Alice swooshes back to them, interrupting her again. Totally being reaffirmed by her awesome friends she finally swooshes away and Bette could get into the whole Jenny fiasco. But now she doesn’t want to anymore. That might come back and bite you in the ass, Bette. “… I’ll tell you later. I just wana have fun.” Grind your bodies to the groove, ladies.

First 15 minute break. Bell rings. Gosh, this all sounds awfully official. DING DING DING Everyone’s running to the bathrooms, where Bette of course has to run into Jodi. Jenny told Jodi about Bette and Kelly and Bette immediately feels the need to clarify the situation to her ex. Unfortunately Jodi has an ace up her non-existent sleeves – Kelly told her it happened too. Take that, Bette. I’m afraid she might get a rifle and shoot Jenny right then and there.

It’s line-dancing time. Shane mentions how sad it is that Bette and Tina are moving to New York. They don’t even know they’re moving to New York so where did Shane get that from? All Alice says is “What?”.

Shane asks about Angie, Jenny asks Bette whether she told Tina, Bette swears at Jenny and Shane begs Bette and Tina to please not leave her here. I wouldn’t want to be left with Jenny either. Get out, Shane, Get out NOW!

Jamie flirts with Tasha, Alice asks Helena whether there is something going on between Tasha and Jamie and asked whether she should be worried Helena answers “Honestly? Yes”. Uh-oh.

Nicki waltzes onto the dance floor, homing in on Shane. Apologizing for running out on her the last time she asks for a second chance. Shane makes a remark that some people are not so good at taking care of others. Might not have been intended as a jab, but it totally came across as one. Well, hun, you send her away in a not very nice fashion. Don’t blame the poor girl. I would have called 911 and stuck around at a safe distance. You’re not as special as people make you out to be, darling.

The bell rings again. It’s competition round. Alice runs into Shane backstage. Jenny got them signed up, but she ain’t too happy about that. Shane doesn’t want to get any shit from Alice about Jenny today. Sunset saves her since Jenny and her are up next.

Backstage Bette and Tina are getting ready as the three musketeers appear. Alice is immediately in competition mode. Her and Bette size each other up.

Alice: “I didn’t know dance fever was back on the air.”
Bette: “Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t realize Kris Kross was looking for a new member…. Hey Al, nice camel-toe.”

DING DING DING this round goes to Bette. But Bette, really, really? Kris Kross? Not Salt N Pepa? Given your age I would have thought you’d bring up the older pairing. Guess that gives us an idea how old the writer for this episode is. (EDIT: Apparently Salt N Pepa and Kriss Kross were present on the music scene at about the same as I was just told by one of my music encyclopedia friends so never mind what I wrote there. Guess MY age is showing now!)

Each of the fighters, I mean dancers, goes to their respective corners. Tasha points out that all this should be fun. Alice can’t believe what she’s hearing.

Bette asks Tina whether they need to go over their routine again.

Bette: “…are you sure? Because you know what, they got wigs and spandex. This is no fucking joke. We have no idea what they’re capable of.”

Jeez. And here I thought this was only a charity dance-a-thon. No need for WMDs. Seriously.

Jenny can’t help but notice the meaningful glances between Shane and Nicki as our Salt N Pepa musketeers have a little problem – Alice has jitters. Guess her doubts are not about the routine or their looks, Tasha…

Rocking the house with their routine

Bette is getting worried

and sometime during that dance Dylan must have arrived and reconciled with Helena since they are standing together in the crowd having a good time.

Alice is not too happy with their scores since one of the judges only gave them a 5.5.

Bette and Tina seem to like that.

Another bathroom break and someone is taking way too long in one of the stalls. Guess they’re not peeing. As soon as I see Shane I want this scene to be over quickly since I assumed she’d be busy with her girlfriend Jenny. But no need to rush. It’s Nicki, not Jenny. We may linger a bit longer.

Now it’s Bette and Tina’s turn. Not in the bathroom, on stage. And both of them are looking mighty fine I might add.

Super hot dance too

intercut with the Shane-Nicki sex scene and Dylan finally walking up to Helena. Guess that earlier spotted Dylan-Helena pairing in the crowd was an editing mistake or they thought no one would catch it. Either way I am glad to have those two back. Hotness on stage with Bette and Tina

and more hotness in the crowd thanks to Dylan and Helena.

What more could we ask for?

While Bette’s hands are cradling Tina’s body, Shane’s are doing the same with Nicki and Dylan is winning her Helen(a) back. Seems like we have a winner.

Bette and Tina backstage

totally happy with their results. Bette going over to Alice asking “Still friends, camel-toe?” and we reveal yet another contestant couple – Jodi and her unidentified black-haired female partner.

Everyone is staring at Jodi and her partner dancing. Amazing and other superlatives are used to describe them. I don’t see it. Granted, what she does is amazing considering she is deaf, but should that give her an advantage? Shouldn’t she be judged like everyone else? Maybe I just don’t like the song they are dancing too, but I thought Salt N Pepa was better and Bette and Tina hit it out of the park. But guess who wins?

Our ladies are crowding around the buffet table exasperated how someone could get three tens. Yeah, I don’t get it either. Now gimme one of those spring rolls would ya? The real bad news is Tasha and Jamie, and Alice realizing what’s going on.

Nicki is out of the bathroom and back with her entourage in the VIP lounge. One of her bright friends alerts her to someone approaching in a rather genius way:

Genius friend: “Nicki, 12 o’clock. No the other 12. Uh, behind you.”

And here I always though “behind you” is generally referred to as “your six”, but that might just be me – me and the rest of the world. Anyways, The Schecter is approaching and wants to talk. She wants Nicki to auction off a date with herself for the good cause.

Outside Helena and Dylan are busy making up for lost time. They’re having a heart to heart and decide to forget about the past and start new. Cheers to that. Someone bring in, or out, the champagne.

On stage Nicki starts auctioning herself off.

Guess who wins that date with her? Jenny with her crazy, what else, $25 000 bid. Nicki and Shane are not amused. Especially when Jenny walks up on stage, takes the mic and tells Shane and the whole world that she doesn’t have to sneak off and fuck her in a bathroom. Man, that Schecter has eyes and ears everywhere.

Jenny explains her actions to Shane:

Jenny: “Listen. I don’t care. You can fuck whoever you want, whenever you want, fuck Nicki, fuck whoever. I know that you need it. It doesn’t scare me. Because I know you. Okay?”

Okay. Understanding Jenny scares me even more than crazy Jenny. Shane seems to be with me on that.

It’s the next morning, everyone is exhausted. Bette goes backstage to congratulate Jodi, who is packing up her stuff. They have a little chat about what’s been going on and that it’s important to Bette what Jodi thinks of her. Jodi wishes her and Tina the best. Bette leans in for a hug, but chickens out.

Alice asks Jamie whether she has feelings for Tasha.

Bette and Tina arrive at the bus depot, discussing New York again. Bette is gung-ho about it, saying she could also work from New York. When the friends are brought up it takes a bit longer to justify the possible move, but considering them family Tina and Bette leaving LA wouldn’t mean leaving their friends.

Bette: “It’ll be a fresh start.”
Tina: “It’s a new city. It’s gonna be so exciting… oh my god, we have to apply for schools. Like right now. “
Bette: “I know.”

Right back into family mode. Guess the possible move is a certainty now. Nothing says The Show Is Over like one of the main couples leaving town. Leaving the crazy Schecter behind would be enough reason for me. But then again, she will be dead soon so don’t put a deposit down on a new house just yet.

At Hit Club Sunset, without his drag, is taking to the stage to forever win over the lady of his heart with one helluva major confession:

Sunset (out of drag): “Now most of you know me as Sunset Boulevard. (GASP) But my real name is Sunny Benson. And I’m a straight man who loves this gay and lesbian family. (applause) And I hope you can still accept me.”

Of course we can, man. And Kit too. Right after she gets over the fact that you lied to her and considers you a con man. He points out he never said he was gay and thanks to his get-up Kit just assumed. But she has a hard time getting over the fact that she told him so much intimate stuff. He asks her out to dinner and I think I heard a muffled “okay” from Kit. I’m sure he did too or he wouldn’t have that grin on his face.

At the bus depot Bette and Tina are excited to welcome their birth mother, but she is a no show. The baby dreams are over.

But how hot does Bette look in those fuck-me-boots?

Tasha and Alice finally talk about the Jamie situation, while desperately holding on to each other on the dance floor.

Alice: “I want you to know I … I’ve never loved you more. And I want you to be happy. So do you want to be with Jamie?”
Tasha: “I don’t… I don’t know…”
Alice: “It’s okay.”
Tasha: “I’m not ready to let you go.”

“Ladies and Gentlemen, we have our last couple standing.”

One more episode to go. Let the nailbiting begin.

see MsQueer’s “End of The L Word Tribute to “6 Wild, Wonderful, and WTF? Years” :

Don’t know how long this will be “viewable” – there was a “part 2″ that already got pulled from YouTube….ADD: POSTED IT BELOW – We’ll see how long it stays.)

This clip was titled “Before the credits roll, part 1″

Here’s the commentary from the post:

if disabled, go to YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eW-vtsIX1RQ

THIS VIDEO PROPERTY OF SHOWTIME AND THE L WORD. NO COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT INTENDED.

HERE’S THE DIALOG FROM THIS CLIP, if you can’t view it:

Nikki is found hiding in the bushes near the pool and police force her out at gunpoint.

An officer brings her into Bette’s living room where the girls are sitting with Officer Duffy (played by the iconic Lucy Lawless). 

When Shane asks Nikki what she’s doing there she starts babbling, “I came to talk to Jenny. I saw what was going on at the dance marathon and I just saw the way she was keeping you as a prisoner and I just wanted to tell her that she had to free you…”

Shane: Nikki, Shut up. SHUT UP!

Cut to outside house, woman approaching scene, officer yells, “Hold it!”

It’s Tasha. She asks: “What’s going on here?”

Officer: “You can’t go in”

She pulls out her ID while saying, “Listen I’m a police officer. Well, I’m in the Academy. OK. What’s going on here, please.”

Cut back to inside of house. Show the door being opened from outside by police officer as Tasha enters into room saying, “Alice.”

Alice: “What are you doing here?”

Tasha, walking toward Alice:  “Come here. Are you okay?” 

Alice rises and goes to her, Tasha takes Alice’s hand then draws her into her and embraces her.  

Tasha: “I’m here. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.”

Officer Duffy steps forward after watching all this:  “You know, I’m afraid this is going to take a bit longer than we thought.” 

Bette: “Well, we’ll do whatever you need for us to do.”

Kit: “We’ll cooperate with you.”

Tina: “yeah, we’re a very tight knit group.” 

Shane: “and, uh, we take care of each other.” 

Alice: “None of us did anything wrong. We just don’t know what happened out there.”

Helena: “you probably just want us to come down to the station.” 

(that’s where the clip was cut, or continues on “part 2.”  Don’t know how the poster got this, it has the tell-tale marks of raw film from the editor’s station, but “WE DON’T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED  OUT THERE.” J

This clip was titled “Before the Credits Role, part 2″

See: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hwMKlnBlNcw

 THIS VIDEO PROPERTY OF SHOWTIME AND THE L WORD. NO COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT INTENDED.

In case they disable this one too, it includes a short clip of Jenny saying “thanks” to all her friends on a self-made video. A suicide good-bye note?  Also shows a really sexy ”walk-off” by all principle characters/actors –  smiling, happy, and YES, TIBETTE hand-in-hand for the final view! (Well, at least we got one concession from crazy creator Ilene Chaiken!) -MsQueer

For other videos and posts go to http://msqueer.wordpress.com/the-l-word/

Vote for who you think “Who dunit?” at

http://msqueer.wordpress.com/2009/03/08/who-killed-jenny-schecter-revealed/

©2009 MsQueer.com. All rights reserved on original copy. ALL RIGHTS TO VIDEOS BELONG TO SHOWTIME AND THE L WORD. No copyright infringement intended.

Stumble It!

Here’s interviews with TLW cast members Mia Kirshner, Laurel Hollowman, Leisha Hailey and Jennifer Beals, courtesy of ShowTime. (Also Rachel Shelley and Alexandra Hedison below).

Mia Kirshner:

Laurel Holloman:

Leisha Hailey: 

Jennifer Beals: 

Here’s one from Rachel Shelley talking about her character (Helena Peacbody) in Season 6 and a spoiler announcement regarding “Dylena” in Season 6:

ALL VIDEOS ARE THE PROPERTY OF SHOWTIME AND THE L WORD. No Copyright infringement intended. I own nothing!

For Season 6 Interviews/Podcasts go to ShowTime’s official L Word site (click on link here).

See Spoiler clips of 608 at http://msqueer.wordpress.com/2009/03/02/the-l-word-season-finale-spoiler/

http://msqueer.wordpress.com/2009/03/03/the-l-word-season-finale-608-promo-vids-from-showtime/

Vote for who you think “Who dunit?” at

http://msqueer.wordpress.com/2009/03/08/who-killed-jenny-schecter-revealed/

-MsQueer

©2009 MsQueer.com. All rights reserved. (All Rights to Videos belong to ShowTime and The L Word).
 

Stumble It!

The L Word goes out with a “bang” – at least in terms of Showtime’s promotional efforts.  Hopefully the plotlines won’t all converge into some wimpy aftermath of the “Who Killed Jenny Schecter” pseudo-mystery. (HINT: TLW Spin-off featuring Leisha Hailey is set on a prison farm with Alice as an official “guest.” Coincidence?)

Anyway, there will HRC Parties (see: http://www.hrc.org/11632.htm) around the country to view the 2 hour-long finale including an hour-long cast commmentary/farewell special immediately folllowed by the finale episode (until the movie).

Meantime, here’s a preview of the final “splash.” (No pun intended). -MsQ

!!!!SEE SPOILER CLIPS of 608 at http://msqueer.wordpress.com/2009/03/02/the-l-word-season-finale-spoiler/

http://msqueer.wordpress.com/2009/03/03/the-l-word-season-finale-608-promo-vids-from-showtime/

NOTE: Video property of ShowTime and The L Word. I OWN NOTHING.

Welcome to The Chocolate Factory. This is your host – Jenny Wonka!

As always the question ‘What happened to Jenny’ follows closely on the heals of an L Word episode starting to air. Did she finally realize what a twat she has been and wants to make up for past mistakes and throws Max a party? A Willy Wonka kids party? Too many obvious gags to go for here. Which ones do The L Word writers chose? Of course the ’someone had to suck on some helium and make a silly voice” one. But just for once I find that remarkably fitting – silly setting, silly voice. That Shane and Alice are the ones sucking on helium just makes it so much more fitting for me. Oh Shane what happened to you? This all reminds me of Alice’s birthday party that Bette and Tina forgot and Alice arrives at Baby Angie’s half-year-party with a little kid opening the door asking her “Are you the clown?”. So Shane, are ya?

Jenny is in hyper-commanding mode and looks mightily scary with that gigantic lollipop she is sucking on. I just want to stuff the entire thing in her big mouth, hopefully shutting it forever.

Dylan and Helena appear and make sure we understand this shock fest of Jenny’s tyranny is a baby shower for Max. I don’t really care what they’re saying as long as I see them being all lovey-dovey.

Of course Jenny has to ruin the moment, again (remember that hot Shane Carmen scene and Jenny called?!), and opens the door. Good bye lovey-dovey, welcome to Jenny’s ‘I-can’t-help-but-be-honest’ horror show. As soon as Jenny says “You guys look very happy together” we know she is going to drop a bomb. Why does she have to congratulate Dylan on passing The Test (see the previous episode recap for details)? Does her deviousness have no boundaries? Ah memory-flash, Helena already stated in a previous episode this season that “Jenny has no boundaries!”. Someone save Dylan from Jenny’s devious shroud of honesty. I knew stuffing Jenny’s mouth with that ginormous lollipop was a good idea. Too late now.

Dylan leaves as Max comes in and Helena hisses “I’m going to fucking kill your girlfriend!”. Exit Dylan and Helena, enter Max – SURPRISE! Oh and the facial parasite is back too. Urgh.

Who would have thought that Max could sink even lower? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? Exactly. BUT it is possible. Poor Mom-Dad Max, you already were the laughing stock of the show, but this is really making it clear. It’s as subtle as smacking someone over the head with a frying pan.

Helena comes back to the party, totally devastated. Unfortunately too devastated to even think about killing Jenny. Maybe later (I sure hope so!). Bette, Tina and Alice can’t believe what just happened:

Alice: ” We should just grab Shane and make a run for it.”
Tina: “Maybe she didn’t mean for it to be so malicious.”
Alice: “Oh yeah. No, no, no, Jenny is not malicious.”
Bette: “No, not at all. Just completely and totally evil.”

Bette hits it right on the head and wins the basket of Willy Wonka bars, that Kit was supposed to bring (at least in my book).

Next on the game list is “Chocolate in the diaper”. How come Bette knows so much about this? Anyways, so in the game you have to smell what chocolate the shit is. Sounds like a game about the bad writing on The L Word. Mostly we feel like someone handed us a diaper and made us eat the shit. Unless Angela Robinson writes and directs – that shit is made out of pure gold (see previous episode).

Shane and Jamie do a little bonding over smoking some weed. Just don’t let crazy Jenny find out with her lollipop. Speaking of Jenny, she is crawling closer and closer and pops up like a jack in the box, not really scaring Shane in her weed smoking habits, but Jamie makes a run for it. Good choice.

Jenny seems to have learned her lesson and doesn’t give Shane a hard time for flirting with Jamie. But right after, she brings up having a present for Shane. That got me all worried right then and there.

Now it’s present time for the Mom-Dad. Kit brought rocker onesies, Bette and Tina a stroller that comes with a DVD and can do it all (probably even drive by itself, just ask Bette, she has read the manual from cover to cover) and before we can get to Jenny’s present the conversation goes to birthing, c-sections, cutting things open that just should never be cut open. Max is shocked and scared beyond belief. He might have something to contribute to that “Chocolate in the Diaper” game by now. Jenny is trying to bring the attention back to the present (pun intended) and just for once I am totally with her. Stop talking about cutting things open and especially stop making all the cutting gestures. Seriously, ladies, what’s wrong with y’all?

It is finally revealed what amazing present Jenny bought for Max. What could it be when it has to come from devious Jenny while still being appropriate for a baby shower? How about a breast pump?

Jenny, really? Anyone surprised Mom-Dad doesn’t like the present? No one except maybe deviously crazy Schecter. And of course the whole thing sets the party off:

Jenny: “I understand that you identify as a man, but I think it’s important that as a parent you can’t be selfish for the child.”
Helena: “She’s uh – she’s giving life lessons now.”
Max (aka Mom-Dad): “It’s my own fucking choice if I breastfeed, okay?”
Helena: “Jenny, what do you know about any of this – bringing up kids, family. What do you know about that?”

Oh right. Haven’t we all forgotten by now that Helena is a double mommy? Thank you L Word writers for sending the kids to France with her Oscar-nominated ex, to never be heard from again.

Alice tries to alleviate the tension by giving a speech. A rather poignant speech with kudos to Bette and Tina for being awesome parents, jabs at Jenny stealing Alice’s treatment and Shane not being able to leave Jenny. Throughout the whole thing Max is having a panic attack, culminating in him kneeling before Bette and Tina and asking them to please adopt his baby.

He can’t handle them saying no and has a full on panic attack. Jamie steps in trying to take care of him, while Helena does what I would be doing – drinking.

Bette and Tina have an appointment with Joyce Wishnia. Any reason to get Jane Lynch on camera is reason enough for me. Especially when she is texting about her clients boring her to tears.

Getting rid of their boring adoption story line Joyce is eager to break the news of her recent engagement to Phyllis to the two.

As Bette and Tina are leaving we are privy to the reason for this scene. Apparently the birth mother being from Nevada is a problem since Nevada does not allow same sex couples to adopt. Thank heavens you ladies have Joyce, who really knows her law. Where could this possibly lead to? Is Mom-Dad still having a panic attack? For now Bette and Tina are planning on having the birthmother stay in their home, aka the construction site, and give birth to their future family addition in the state of California.

The three musketeers are crashing at Alice’s place after a major workout. Jamie is helping Tasha prepare for some police academy fitness stuff. Is there anything Jamie can’t do? Subtlety is apparently one thing she can’t do, mentioning she has to go home to take a shower before heading out to the restaurant with the other two thirds of the musketeers. Of course Alice and Tasha make her shower right here and now and of course Tasha has to walk in on her – and Jamie doesn’t really mind.

All of a sudden Tasha is rather hot for her girlfriend, who is a bit surprised given their guest is just in the other room. But who doesn’t like some afternoon delight with the possibility of being caught? Jamie hears them as she steps out of the shower, but has the decency to wait in the hallway until they’re done. Now it’s Tasha’s and Alice’s turn in the shower. Shame the camera won’t witness that the way we got to see Jamie shower. The Tasha-Alice one would have at least been hot and a lot more interesting.

Bette and Tina are returning to their construction site, I mean home, and we are introduced to their contractor – a woman. A rather dyke-ish looking woman, so I was really surprised when she talks about her boys looking good and saying she wouldn’t kick the “handsome fellow”, aka the architect, out of her bed. Bette and Tina share my surprise as I am sure does every single viewer and we are treated to another hilarious Bette-and-Tina-being-funny moment:

Bette: “Okay, I am so confused. Are you confused?”
Tina: “Oh I am very confused.”
Bette (whispering): “She’s a dyke, right?”
Tina: “I don’t know. She doesn’t know she’s a dyke.”
Bette: “That’s because she’s a yikes.”
Tina: “YIKES! He’s a handsome fellow…”

Bette imitates the contractor’s unique laugh and they both crack up. Why have these ladies not been given more fun stuff to do? They are hilarious!

Jenny drives Shane to her surprise.

Jenny: “This is your own photography studio.”

When did Shane start photography? Did I miss an entire episode? Jenny learned all the lingo, plastering the scene with “strobes”, “bounce” and “seamless”. Just for once I wish I had a girlfriend that would pamper me like that. But I would still say no to DC (deviously crazy) Jenny.

Let’s introduce the contractor to the lesbian couple she is working for. Tina is leaving for New York as the contractor is creeping up on Bette asking where her sister is going. Bette is confused about how her contractor knows Kit only to be totally surprised by her contractor thinking of Tina as her sister (they do look so much alike!). She gets that they are partners and that Tina is Angie’s other mommy, but she still thought they were sisters. Going with the whole shit-in-diapers-scenario from earlier is that what this lady has for a brain? How twisted do your mental wires have to be for thinking like that? This woman is clearly in denial, blocking anything gay out. Check out their conversation below:

Dyke-in-denial: “Is your sister going to New York?”
Bette: “My sister Kit?”
Dyke-in-denial: “I thought her name was Tina?”
Bette: “Tina is not my sister. Tina is my partner. She is Angelica’s other mother.”
Dyke-in-denial: “Well, yeah, I get that you’re partners, I just thought that you were sisters.”
Bette: “Nope.”
Dyke-in-denial: “Is she a Wentworth?”
Bette: “What? No. She’s a Kennard.”
Dyke-in-denial: “Then why is she going to New York? Isn’t she gonna be at your opening tomorrow? So I won’t see her then.”
Bette: “Are you going to the opening?”
Dyke-in-denial: “Yeah! I’m pumped. I hear that art openings are a great place to meet the fellows. And I am looking. I’ll see you tomorrow. “
Bette: “See you tomorrow… I’m just confused.”

Aren’t we all. To make up for that let me post a pic.

Sunset Boulevard is spinning at Hit Club, while Helena is drowning her Dylan sorrow at her own bar. Kit has had enough and needs to vent to Sunset, who is finally realizing that Kit and Helena are not a couple. Those wigs must really sit tight around his precious little brain. Before Kit can affirm him of her sexual orientation Helena makes a scene on the dance floor.

Bette is at the gallery prepping everything just right for the grand opening later that day. Bette being Bette she has to do everything herself. No assistant will ever be able to adhere to the Bette Porter perfection standards. Her in a tight dress on a ladder gives Kelly a few things to think about. Probably not just her.

Bette gets a call from T. and a jealous look from K., Kelly. Sorry, some names are still mentioned in full. The apparent crisis Kelly uses to get Bette off the phone is about oysters. Bette is not amused and tells Kelly as much. Backtrack, Kelly. Backtrack ever so carefully or the Porter wrath will get you.

Bette: “…you got me off the phone with Tina to talk to me about Oysters?”
backtracking Kelly: “I’m sorry. I dunno – the call seemed like it wasn’t so important. It just looked like she was checking up on you.”
Bette: “No, we don’t do that to one another. We support each other.”
backtracking Kelly: “Well… then what’s up with tonight? I mean, I don’t think that’s very supportive.”
Bette: “She would be here if she could. She has business in New York.”
backtracking Kelly: “More important than being here for you?”
Bette: “Kelly, you know what? It’s taken us a long time to get to this point, but Tina’s work is just as important to her as mine is to me. And that’s a good thing…. It’s good for our relationship, it’s good for our bank account.”
backtracking Kelly: “I’m surprised. I mean, I dunno, she struck me as your wife.”
Bette: “No, not a wife.”

Good to know Bette thinks this way now. She has come quite a way since Season One.

Alice and Tasha are greeted by Jamie’s dog at Jamie’s door that leads right into Jamie’s apartment. Why are we here? Didn’t Jamie shower at Alice’s place so she wouldn’t have to come all the way back to her place? Did I miss something? Guess the night-day-change was too subtle for me. Anyways, Jamie has to get dressed since she obviously didn’t know Alice and Tasha were coming over to pick her up. And that mirror is just by accident perfectly placed to give everyone in the apartment front row seats to her changing.

As if that isn’t obvious enough she walks out half-way dressed and asks Alice to help her. Cue irony. Zipping up your own dress, with the zipper being unreachable on the side, is really tough. Tasha doesn’t look too pleased watching the two.

At the grand opening Kit runs into Sunset Boulevard without his drag, Jenny spreads more venom in saying Bette and Kelly look like a couple only to top it all off with comparing eating an oyster to having a man come in her mouth just as Shane pops one in. Impeccable timing, Jenny.

The three musketeers walk in:

Alice: “Ahhh, looks like a giant cat threw up. What do you think?”
Tasha: “I don’t get it.”
Alice: “Well it’s art.”

Priceless.

Nicki arrives with her entourage. Shane needs to grab a hold of the priceless art to steady herself upon seeing Nicki.

“Hey sexy Shane” would probably throw anyone so it doesn’t really come as a surprise that Shane is more than happy to follow Nicki out to her car. Jenny, I guess you finally drover her over the edge.

Helena is still in her drinking stupor, Mama Kit is taking care of her and the line “love sucks, it really does” brings in your love interest. I have to remember that. Sunset out of his drag is still hitting on Kit and she still doesn’t know who he is. Are no-brain-characters really the only way to write certain story lines? Really, L Word writers? There are so many people looking for jobs, one would think the best would prevail. Apparently not.

Since I am writing down lines for future benefit I might as well write down this one to make sure I will never ever utter it:

Sunset Boulevard without drag: “…and I’d love nothing more than to take her home with me tonight, wake up in the morning with her arms and legs wrapped around me.”

All that gets you is the content of Kits champagne glass all over your face and shirt. No thank you.

Now it’s Jamie’s turn to call Bette and Kelly a couple. Only this time they are a power couple. Jenny stops her from going any further, asking whether they have seen Shane. Alice still holds her grudge: “Did somebody say something?” and Jamie points out that Jenny wears that she has been really damaged and that scares Jamie about having kids. That sparks a whole discussion about parents and how they treated their kids. Tasha and Jamie carry the conversation with Alice being only part of the audience.

Alice is surprised by what Tasha is telling them, pointing out that only through Jamie’s presence has she opened up.

Nicki and Shane are in Shane’s dark room, that Jenny bough for her. Since when is Shane into photography? I am still having a memory lapse here. Either it’s me or the L Word writers. The first photo revealed is of Molly.

But you can kiss that one good-bye right away since Shane vomits all over it after kissing Nicki. Bad oyster moment coming back up? Do we really have to crush this poor little girl even more? She does the only thing she can do – she leaves.

Bette is paying the babysitter as Kelly comes rushing in with a bottle of champagne. Bette knows it’s a bad idea but let’s Kelly in nevertheless.

Jenny is taking care of Shane who must have eaten a couple of bad oysters, continuously throwing up left, right and center. You have to hand it to Jenny, she does take care of the ones she loves.

Kelly is clearly drunk as she tells Bette what a success their grand opening was. Trying to “cash in on a little raincheck” she takes Bette’s hand and doesn’t let go. Bette tells her that “…that coupon… it expired like 15 years ago” but Kelly won’t have it and Bette has to forcefully push her away as she comes in for the lip lock. The only result is a smashed champagne glass on the floor. Or is it?

When Jenny sees Bette and Kelly the whole scene looks a bit different. Hmmm, I wonder who will be next in line to kill Jenny Schecter?

This week we get fun, hotness and none of Max’s facial hair. Sounds like a promising episode, right? It was.

The breakfast table at The Planet. Bette and Tina are busy on their respective phones, annoying the hell out of everyone around them (and us, the viewers). Tina has big news: JENNY SOLD HER SCRIPT! No one knew she was working on a screenplay. Until two episodes ago neither did Jenny I’m sure. How much time passed between those two episodes? Hollywood sure works helluva lot faster on The L Word than in real life. Write and sell a script (after a bidding war!) in what, two weeks? But more importantly where did the sudden inspiration come from, Miss Schecter? What muse kissed you? Or rather, who was stupid enough to tell you of all people about their own treatment idea? Hmmmm…. Anyone? Anyone? Bueller, I mean Alice? Anyone?

Just to prove my point Tina goes on and on about how Jenny’s new script is different. It’s about this talk show host and this cop! Ring a bell? Yeah, it does for Alice too, who is sitting across from Tina hearing about Jenny selling her idea for $500 000. Guess who’s getting in line to kill Jenny…

…and Jenny must have seen this coming. She can’t be that deluded? Or maybe she can be. Cos I know I wouldn’t have opened my front door to Hurricane Alice rushing in and wreaking havoc. But she did, totally oblivious to what’s going on. You have to hand it to her, no one does faux innocent like Jenny does. For a second I thought Jenny might have a brain tumor or other problems with her memory capacity, just cos of the way she looked at Alice when Alice gave her a rundown of everything Jenny had stolen. I thought I had stumbled upon the reason of Jenny’s death – a brain aneurysm while swimming in the pool. But The Schecter trashes that borderline triumphant feeling and stomps on it with her high heels as she tells Alice “…that jumble of ideas that you gave me?” But she isn’t done yet. We all know how Jenny likes to stick the knife in, but the best part is her twisting it ever so slowly in your back:

“…in no universe would that mish-mash of ideas be considered a sellable treatment. And for your own information, I have been working on a screenplay of my own for the last couple of months and if it happens to bear some resemblance to something that you jotted down then it’s pure coincidence.”

And then the finishing death move:

“…it’s something called the idea well. There is a well. All the writers drink from the same fountain. BUT, it takes genius, talent, craftsmanship to take a kernel of an idea and turn it into a sellable screenplay.”

Alice says what we are all thinking:

That’s the cue for poor, innocent (I can’t believe I use that word in a Shane sentence) Shane walking in on Hurricane Alice demanding to know what the hell is going on now. Alice is more than happy to oblige:

“She’s crossed the fucking line, Shane. She’s fucking crossed it. This is how it’s gonna be. If you continue to shack up with this fucking lying, stealing snake in the fucking grass I swear to God I cannot consider you to be my friend anymore.”

Well , Shane. What shall it be? Fucking crazy Jenny or remaining friends with the friends you had for ages? Would be an easy decision for me.

Hurricane Alice rushes over to The Planet while telling Tina everything over the phone. The phone and face to face conversations mix when she plummets to a chair at Bette and Tina’s table bordering on going nuclear. Bette and Tina have their new headquarters, I mean offices, at The Planet since Bette can’t work from home thanks to their construction crew (I wouldn’t like having to watch sweaty men at work either) and Tina doesn’t feel comfortable at her office anymore thanks to Aaron accusing her of stealing the neg. What happened to Tina? Wasn’t she a big honcho in the studio? And now she lets herself be too “uncomfortable” to go to her own office to work? I know she is a woman, but could she grow some balls? Maybe Bette can show her how she does it every now and then.

Never mind all this negativity going on cos it goes right out the window as soon as Alice gets a text that makes that wonderful smile appear on her face. Hmmm, who just texted her that could have that kind of effect. Tasha? Nope. It was the new girl in town – Jamie. Of course, who else. Everyone is gushing over the new arrival. Everyone other than Helena that is. Oh and me. The mention of Jamie always brings my mind to Helena. And where is Helena? That would be much more interesting than this Jamie stuff that will soon turn into a huge mess anyways if you ask me.

It takes a Bette (aka a woman with balls) to finally say what we have all been yelling at our screens the past few weeks. But Bette doesn’t only say it, she sings it: “Youuuu’re haaaavinnng a thiiiiiirdwheeeeeel cruuuuush.”

Tina agrees, but Alice of course denies it: “…we’re friends.” To which Bette does her best yeah-right-laugh ever and proceeds along with Tina to give her the “telltale signs”:

- You have been dating your partner for quite a while and you’re starting to grow bored with one another.

- You start fighting all the time.

- Then you meet a new person and you hang out all the time. All three of you doing everything together. And it’s just “great”. And this new person revitalizes your relationship, bringing all this energy and excitement into it.

- The syndrome can last weeks, months….up to a year.

- All good as long as it doesn’t “tip“. When one part of the couple falls for the new person.

Thanks for the rundown ladies.

After this fun little intermission I finally get my wish and Helena sits her nice booty down next to Alice, while Bette delivers another one of the best lines this episode: “So you just check yourself before you wreck yourself”, which gives Kit a startled look as she sits down as well. She probably thought that was my line baby sis.

Tina gives the new arrivals the scoop. As soon as Jamie’s name is uttered Helena gets this big grin and everyone else is starting to make fun of Alice’s and Tasha’s infatuation with that new girl. I missed that friendly banter. If only it wasn’t alternated with the craziest Schecter craze ever.

Thanks to Kit’s awesome segway “dangerous business uh uh” the table is informed that Helena is having dinner with Dylan. Anyone say “whaaaaaat?”.

Alice says it best: “Are you on crack?” Did I mention how much I missed the friendly banter over the coffee table? Now let’s finally get rid of Schecter and the world will be alright again. Back to Helena. Everyone thinks her meeting Dylan is a bad idea so Alice comes up with a better one – a test, a test of character. This reminds me of the first season awesomeness when the gang went on a mission “to ascertain the disposition and intent of one Miss Lara Perkins”. Ah, the good old times. Random trivia fact: Bette opens and closes her laptop three times during this scene.

The plan: Get Shane to get Nicki to seduce Dylan to prove to Helena and the gang that she has no ulterior motive. Then get Jenny and her mischievous and twisted mind to impersonate Nicki’s agent and sell the idea to Dylan. Then Dylan has to call Helena cos Nicki wants to meet at Hit Club and she has to make sure that’s going to be okay.

Main problem: Doesn’t Dylan know what Jenny sounds like? Granted, she has been gone for a few years, but would you really fall for something like that? When Spielberg calls you, you assume it’s a prank at first (unless you’re crazy Jenny and have an ego the size of Manhattan). At least I would. Not insinuating that Nicki is Spielberg, but she is the hottest thing in town in L Word land right now. I know I wouldn’t buy it.

Dylan goes for it. “It’s on!” Dawn Denbo would say. This is going to end in a disaster.

Jenny has a little freak out when she finds out that Shane spoke to Nicki (see details of plan above). “You can’t see Nicki, I forbid it.” Shane gives her a weird who-do-you-think-you-are look, tells her there is nothing to worry about but Jenny won’t leave it alone. She is sabotaging her own relationship with Shane by not letting the Nicki topic go. Her constant fear of Nicki coming between them would be unsubstantial if only she would finally stop mentioning the N-word.

On to the next disaster. Bette and Tina are at dinner with Kelly and an artist/man-toy. Kelly can’t help but mention that Bette used to be in love with her and that she has missed her chance at something with Bette. Tina doesn’t quite like what she is hearing and I don’t blame her. As soon as the artist/man-toy leaves thanks to a phone call, Bette tells Kelly to “take it down a notch”. Bette ends up having to take over the phone call, something to do with an art shipment. When she is gone Kelly confides to the artist/man-toy that Bette might be the one that got away. But that’s not enough. To top it all off Kelly asks Tina whether it bothers her that she is flirting shamelessly (at least she acknowledges that fact) with her girlfriend. Tina has a pretty good retort:

“No, no, flirt away. I mean, Bette knows that if she were to ever cheat on me that that would be the end of us. So if it makes you feel scandalous and sexy to tease her with her co-ed crush, have at it.” Insert a big grin at the end to fully bring the point home.”

And to top that one off Aaron and some other Hollywood schmucks just walked into the restaurant. Apparently the congregation means that Tina is fired since she was not invited. Hollywood speak, which I do not speak. Thanks for translating, T.

It is the night of the test and Helena and Kit introduce Alice to their amazing surveillance system, all thanks to voyeur Dawn Denbo of course. “Remind me to never talk shit about you” is all Alice can say after witnessing that you can even hear every single conversation going on in the club. Big brother, or more accurate sister, is watching and listening. I wonder if that is also true for the VIP lounge? Pay tons of money to get into the VIP lounge just so everyone can listen in on your conversation. That’s definitely money well spent. Ouch.

The scene gets more interesting as soon as Shane and Jenny walk in. Alice is in growl-mode as soon as she sees The Schecter. Shane makes the mistake of calling it all a huge misunderstanding, that just sets Alice off.

Before we can get into more detail on that Dylan arrives and all eyes, including the electronic ones, are on her. Nicki arrives shortly after and is let loose on Dylan. Waltzing through the club, meeting and greeting all kinds of people, Nicki makes her way towards Dylan while the gang up in their Eagle Eye positions are munching popcorn. The get-together is happening in a secluded booth, that just happened to be totally empty? That never happens for me, but then again I also don’t know the owner of a club. Nicki goes all out after an initial faux pas and tells Dylan that this is her lucky spot cos just last week she made out with a hot chick right where Dylan is sitting. All Eagle Eyes love what’s happening. All of them, except Helena.

Back at dinner with Bette and Tina, the whole table has decided to hate Aaron and consorts. Tina excuses herself to get some air and you can see it in Bette’s eyes that she will go over there and let Aaron know what she thinks. Poor Aaron, better brace yourself for the Porter-Tornado coming your way. Bette marches over there like a duelist about to kill his opponent. Tina sees that and immediately runs over to intervene and halt the natural disaster that is Bette’s scorn. As the mirky waters are about to clear Aaron has to utter the worst thing possible in that situation: “I am so happy to be done with dykes.” Before Bette can even start Tina steps in and tears him a new one:

“You stupid fucking cocksucker, how dare you sit there with that smug little smile on your face and wine and dine my writers on a project that took me three years to put together. As if you had anything, anything to do with it.”

Then she brings William’s involvement in the theft of the negative to light and tells him (them) that he won’t get away with it. How do you top that awesome rant Tina just gave? Bette manages to do that with just a look.

We’re back to new reality show The Test and Nicki talking about how you win an Oscar, or at least get a nom. You have to play ugly, retarded or lesbian. She brings up Charlize Theron in Monster, Nicole Kidman in The Hours and Sean Penn in I Am Sam. The film buff in me was grinning from ear to ear as she was saying that. Oh Nicki…. The gang is still doing their best impression of watching a film while eating popcorn and talking to the screen as Nicki makes her move and touches a bracelet on Dylan’s arm, asking whether there is someone special. Dylan says there is and I am totally loving the little gestures between Alice and Helena at that point. Small details, but awesome.

Another small detail comes in Nicki’s flirting. Apparently she is “attracted to older women” which makes Jenny shake her head and utter “Fuck you!” while Alice is clearly enjoying herself. But it gets even better. Alice puts down her popcorn and thereby deactivates the whole surveillance equipment. Now that it has gotten interesting between Nicki and Dylan. Damn you Alice. Damn you! Kit has to step in and save the day. The woman who doesn’t know what a text is or how to work her cell phone steps in to save the surveillance equipment and popcorn party by showing her technical expertise? Now we get brainwashing even between episodes, not just between seasons anymore?

The Eagle Eyes are back to the final approach by Nicki and the rebuff by Dylan. Dylan considers it unethical for the director to get involved with the star of their movie. Alice can’t help but say to Jenny: “Guess you didn’t get that memo, huh?” Dylan tells Nicki she is in love with someone, which starts Nicki on her whole “If you want to direct this film…then you are going to come home with me tonight.” Dylan politely declines. Everyone in Big Sisters cheers and squeals. Does anyone seriously think Dylan wasn’t on to this “test”? Come on, she might have been dumb for letting get Helena away, but she ain’t that dumb.

Apparently Dylan is that dumb or just doesn’t care as long as she gets Helena, who goes to meet Dylan. During their conversation Dylan confesses her love to Helena. All Helena does is say “Let’s go somewhere we can talk. This place is not private.” No shit Sherlock. Some of the writing this week really cracks me up.

On the dance floor Nicki is shaking her booty to the beat, Alice, Tasha and Jamie are cruising together and Jenny is going through Shane’s phone hunting for Nicki texts. Shane is resorting to lies now to get five minutes away from Jenny and asks Alice to stall her should she come after her. Welcome Shane on the we-all-know-Jenny-is-fucking-crazy-bandwagon.

Dylan and Helena are over at Dylan’s house reconciling and making up for lost time. The season three hotness has returned. It is one of the few really hot scenes we have been privy to in a very long time. And it’s the first this season where we don’t cut away. The scene is a lot longer than this little paragraph might make it out to be. Enjoy!

After that scene it takes me a while to pay any attention to Nicki approaching Shane outside Hit Club on her smoke (aka Jenny) break. Apparently Nicki misinterpreted Shane showing up that morning asking her to come to the club. Shane apologizes and mentions that she’s with Jenny now. Nicki is really into Shane and even goes as far as saying: “Hey, if it doesn’t work out between you two, you know where to find me.” Awww Nicki….

In Hit Club verbal hits are exchanged between Jamie and Jenny. Welcome Jamie to the ring and not surprisingly in Alice’s corner. It all culminates in Jenny and Alice putting Shane, who just got back from her Nicki encounter outside, on the spot. But she won’t chose sides. Her girlfriend isn’t too happy with that.

Jenny gives Shane shit for not being there when she got cornered “by the three musketeers”. Is Jenny reading my recaps? She is known for stealing ideas. Then she asks Shane whether she fucked Nicki in the bathroom. Oh boy, Jenny….Yet it’s Shane who is apologizing. WTF? They have the whole friendship vs. relationship talk with quite opposing priorities. It’s not going to take long to welcome Shane to the I-want-to-kill-Jenny lineup.

But back to happier topics. Back to Helena and Dylan. They are still busy. With each other. Could Rachel Shelley be any hotter? I don’t think so. My screen agrees with me as I can smell its wires fusing and burning. Here goes another one thanks to Helena-Dylan-hotness. Not that I mind.

Jamie, Tasha and Alice are having a good time on the dance floor now that Jenny is gone. Shane is walking through the haze of her relationship with the crazy Schecter looking for an exit as we fade to black.

What an episode. Definitely more fun in the first half, but great fun at that. Also we finally got a hot sex scene again. That has been missing on this show for quite a while. Tune in next week to find out who is next in line to want to kill Jenny.

Everyone is at the cafe and as soon as Jenny walks in she manages to piss off Max immediately. Way to go Jenny! You haven’t lost your touch at all. And the whole shebang in less than two seconds. That must be some sort of new record. Even for Jenny. Is someone keeping track of this? Moving on.

I guess men and FTMs don’t like being referred to as mothers or beautiful women. Come on, Jenny, catch on! What’s wrong with you? You were the first to call Max “MAX” and refer to him as HE. What happened? Oh yeah, The L Word writing staff is what happened. Never mind.

Max’s pathetic breakdown only helps make the whole thing seem even more ridiculous. Shouldn’t there be some sort of rule to actually get actors for the job of an actor?! I don’t get my hair done by my butcher either. I would still like to know who Daniela Sea beat out to get the role of Max. Who else was lined up at that audition? Anyone know? I would really like to know!

As we come back after the much loved intro song Jenny has an epiphany as to who stole the negative (see last episode’s recap). She brings Williams name up cos she overheard him wanting to burn down one of his buildings for insurance fraud. Tina is not really buying that.

The focal point now shifts to Kelly, who has just waltzed into The Planet and Bette immediately rockets over there to greet her. She introduces her to everyone, but then proceeds to get another table all alone with Kelly. What the hell? Kit comes over and we witness a reunion scene while we hear Tina talk about a possible birth-mother for Bette and her next baby.

Kit finally comes over and now the real dishing starts. She asks Tina what the hell the B I T C H Kelly Fremont, aka Kelly Wentworth, is doing here. Tina doesn’t seem to care much until Kit brings out the big guns and tells everyone that Bette almost killed herself over Kelly when they were in college together. A little known fact to everyone including Tina, who is not very amused.

But before that can even start to boil Dylan walks in. Kit sums it up best with “What is going on here tonight?” although it doesn’t look like night at all. I thought everyone was having breakfast at first. Either way, it turns out Dylan has a meeting with Tina, that Tina didn’t even know about. Ohhh, you mean that filmmaker I’m supposed to meet with is Dylan? Weird huh. Tina usually does her research so how come she doesn’t know who the filmmaker is that she is meeting? I know a lot has been happening in this scene already, but has everyone gone kookoo? After last week’s episode I shouldn’t be surprised.

Turns out Dylan is only meeting with Tina cos she wants to get Helena back. “Helena is the love of my life and I’d give anything for another chance to be with her.” You and everyone else sweetheart.

On the other side of the room Bette is having dinner with Kelly, talking about art. The way that conversation is going it is pretty clear from the start that Bette will end up working with Kelly. More trouble for Tina and Bette on the horizon?

Tina breaks the Dylan-news to the table including Helena, where Jenny utters one of the best lines of the entire episode. In total Godfather mode Jenny asks Helena “What can we offer you in the way of protection?” Is this lady for real? I know I watch a lot of films, but even I wouldn’t say that. Jeeez Jenny. Alice says it best non-verbally by giving Jenny one of the by now infamous Alice looks. Yeah, Jenny, you’re carrazzyyyy.

To remedy the situation Alice wants to hook Helena up with Jamie, the girl that called Alice about that other girl that wanted to jump off a ledge last episode, but Helena is hardly listening, constantly eyeing the business card Dylan left behind. All smooth Helena picks up Tasha’s cup, where the torn remainder of the card has been left to die, while Alice is on the phone, trying to sell the hook-up idea to Jamie. Tasha is all talkative and mucho communicado today, jumping at the chance of talking to Jamie on the phone. Wow, what happened to Tasha? These three have been hanging out lots and seem to be getting along famously. Alice and Tasha are more excited about the hook-up-dinner-date they just arranged than Helena, who all this time has been busy snatching that card without anyone noticing. Seems like Dylan Moreland might be getting that second chance she wants so badly after all.

Shane and Jenny are home and just for once not busy fucking each other. Instead they are clutter clearing, meaning getting rid of some old stuff. Sounds good. Can they clear each other out? That would be great. Jenny won’t let Shane clean out any of her stuff anyways even though she constantly urges her to do so. They are doomed. On to Shane’s stuff, where Jenny rigorously gets rid of old shirts until she hits the vulnerable spot – the Carmen De La Pica Morales era. Shane doesn’t want to forget and get rid of that. Foreshadowing? Let’s hope so. Otherwise let’s get a professional cleaner and get rid of both of them. The world would be a much better place. Okay, maybe not the world, but my tv screen. Jenny + Shane = wrong!

Bette and Tina fight over the new job proposal as they are flying out to meet the birth-mother of their possible future family addition. They sort of resolve the matter – for now – with a kiss. And little Angie is one of the cutest kids on tv. It had to be said.

Alice meets Shane for coffee at a place we haven’t seen before and is totally gushing over new platonic friend Jamie.  Just what is so great about this chick? Someone enlighten me please. Apparently meet-up-dinner tonight, meet-up for Helena and Jamie, will be home-cooked, since everyone other than Helena is broke, and vegetarian, since Jamie is vegetarian. Alice considers herself vegetarian now too since she has been eating lots of vegetables recently. I love Alice and her logic. Maybe a certain Jamie someone has something to do with that. You can literally hear the music scratching to a halt as Jenny walks in, wanting to join them. Alice is not too thrilled. Her uber-excitement from talking about Jamie was swapped for uber-annoyance thanks to Jenny’s arrival. Ups are followed by lows immediately. It seems to be like a law of physics.

Bette and Tina have a rather rude awakening to the homophobic rural areas in the US, where the birth-mother is located. While the birth mother is totally cool with them being gay, her parents are oblivious to the fact at first and when they finally realize it, after asking about Bette and Tina being married, are appalled. Bette can’t grasp the concept of them asking her and her partner whether they are married to men. Two worlds are colliding and the LA crowd is asked to leave. Welcome to America.

Jamie and Alice are preparing the dinner for tonight. Alice is clearly a disaster in the kitchen whereas Jamie seems to be the goddess of the spoon, or rather of the squash-nuts-with-wine bottle variety. Either way a goddess in the kitchen. While she does nothing for me looks-wise I do like a woman that knows what she’s doing in the kitchen.

Kit is at Hit Club again getting hit on by Sunset Boulevard. Now Pam Grier is not in babygirl-mode anymore, but the Sunset-Boulevard-mode is not much better.

Now we get to the truly awkward part of the episode. Helena meeting Jamie. Nicely introduced by switching from one to the other while talking about the same things, but with totally opposing opinions. Those two are a match made in hell, not heaven. Let’s see where this goes.

Meanwhile on the dance floor at Hit Club Max and Tom are having a tough time cos Max doesn’t want Tom to hang with other guys. Kits breaks up their scene just by saying HI and giving Max some prep talk that goes over very well. Max then confesses to Tom that he has all these feelings and that his body is doing things he doesn’t feel comfortable with. They make up and hug. Hugging and kissing seems to be THE way to make up and get over things. Maybe someone should give our world leaders that message.

Back at the romantic-double-date-dinner the new three musketeers are looking at Alice’s baby photos and talking about how many kids they want. As interesting as that conversation is all I can think of is WHERE THE HELL IS HELENA? Wasn’t this supposed to be a hook-up-dinner for Helena and Jamie? Yet Helena is nowhere in sight. After the scene has taken forever Alice finally mentions Helena having two kids and a cut to a different angle reveals Helena standing right behind the three musketeers, all the way behind the couch, wineglass in hand and totally ostracized from whatever is happening. The first chance Helena gets she is out of there. Especially after being reminded of her two cute little kids, who she only gets to see every few months cos her ex took them to the south of France. Poor Helena. Go and get Dylan and make her make you forget all that.

As soon as Helena sees Dylan she runs over to her, startling the poor woman half to death. Guess that angry little shove Helena gave Dylan outside of Hit Club the other night really stuck with her. As soon as Dylan realizes it’s Helena she goes into defensive mode and apologizes for having contacted Tina. She is quite shocked, pleasantly though – who wouldn’t, when Helena instead of beating her face to a pulp asks her out for dinner. I guess that’s not what Helena had planned to say since she mutters “fuuuuuck” as she runs back to her car. I take Rachel Shelley running any day no matter what for.

Now we’re back to The L Word Season Six disaster also known as Shane and Jenny. Jenny in all her craze made Shane’s room into an office, moving all of Shane’s crap into her own room, all coupley and all. Shane is – what shall we call it – not happy. Not in the slightest. She even calls her “crazy”. But the scene is totally turned upside down when Jenny asks the “do you hate/love me” questions and Shane says “I do, I love you.” Someone get me a bucket. Actually, make that two! I don’t think this was it for this week.

Cleaning up seems to be one of the themes this episode. Tasha, Alice and Jamie try to get rid of all evidence of the hook-up-dinner, while setting up a future dance marathon setting as a fundraiser for the LA Gay and Lesbian Center. During the scene it seems like Alice has to mark her territory, namely Tasha, with a kiss on the shoulder since Jamie is getting a bit too familiar for Alice’s taste. That’s at least how I read that, plus I’d do the same thing.

Kit and Sunset Boulevard are having a talk about what Kit likes in men and he definitely seems interested. Max and Tom come home, sort of still fighting. Clearly Tom doesn’t know how to deal with a woman and Max basically is a woman since the hormones during pregnancy give him such an emotionality that a gay man can’t seem to relate to. Tom is tired of Max always putting himself down. I smell abandonment and can see someone mentally packing his things. Or that might just be me. And while you’re packing give Max a haircut and a shave.

Bette and Tina rehash the events of the day as they settle into their hotel room at the Desert Palm Lodge. Thank God the writing team is finally let someone voice what I thought about this adoption and this specific birth-mother from the get-go. You don’t know anything about her, you don’t know anything about the father and given her surroundings you might not want to welcome her child into your home and expose your own child to those genetics. Especially given how picky Bette was concerning the donor for Angelica. Thanks for making Bette question that decision finally.

But then we get a knock on the door and Marcy, aka birth mom, floats into the room, bearing not just a baby but also possibly good news. She wants Bette and Tina to have her baby despite of what her parents think. Great that Bette just had her rant about her concern for getting said baby. Marcy reveals that the baby is going to be a boy and that that is one of the reasons she wants Bette and Tina to adopt him: “This world needs boys that are going to do things different. And I really want my baby to have a chance at that. Making this world, you know, just a little better.” Seems like that sold Bette and Tina on the idea.

The final montage kicks in. Starting with Bette and Tina being all happy and content in their hotel room the next morning, Max lying on his bed alone with dirty feet sticking out, getting up and realizing Tom has left him. That’s it. Quite a short one this week.

Next week on The L Word: Hopefully Dylan and Helena will revisit their season three hotness, Max gets a haircut and doesn’t look like a street bum anymore and the cleaner finally comes to LA to take out Shane and Jenny or at least Jenny. Stay tuned.