No matter how much we were in love with each other, there will come a time when we think to ourselves: “I love my husband or spouse, but I don’t feel in love.” In fact many people come to a place where they may even say, “I don’t think I love my spouse anymore.”

The reason is quite simple.

Most of us get married to be loved, not to learn how to love. I know you are probably reacting to that statement. I was convinced I was the best person in the whole world to love my wife. God had given her to me and I was the one who could love her best. I soon discovered there were some things my wife did that I did not know how to love. I soon discovered that my love was selfish. Along with my attempts to love her came my disappointment when she did not love me the way I expected. I discovered my love was rooted in selfishness.

Our reasons for marriage usually have some flavor of selfishness, usually because we believe we will be better off, they will provide for me, they will give me what I need.

Any marriage that begins with some semblance of selfishness (don’t they all?) will be in for some kind of adjustment. At some point your spouse will fail to do something which we expected or counted on. At some point we will encounter disappointment and even hurt because something we counted on did not get done.

Marriage confronts our biggest sin – Pride.

We all bring pride into our marriage, and because of our pride, we have expectations and those expectations will be disappointed, because our spouse also has pride and selfishness.

Melittledina posted this on askmehelpdesk forum, where you can ask experts anything:

I’ve been with my spouse for now 5 1/2 years. We have two girls. Oldest is 4 years old and the youngest is 2 years old. I am UNHAPPY in my relationship. The first year we where together, when I was pregnant with are first, I discovered that he was sending pornographic photos of himself and his ex-girl-friend on the internet “Live sex chat”. I forgave him. After, I discovered that he stole money that we had for the rent and lied to me about it until I caught him red handed. I forgave him. After, I discovered that he stole his best friend’s credit card. I forgive him. After I discovered that he stole money from his boss at work and he lost his job. I forgive him. Last October, I got a phone call from another woman. HE CHEATED on me! I left him. After 1 week, he tried to kill himself, so AGAIN I forgive him. I am so tired!!! I think today that I am with him only for my children… He is a good father to them. But I can’t live like this anymore. I’ve been thinking of cheating on him to get revenge but that won’t work. I just want him out of my life…

The experts told ‘melittledina’ she needs to divorce her no-good husband for the protection of the children. Obviously Christ was not in their family. Even if ‘Melittledina’ had been a Christian, she probably would have divorced her husband. She had discovered that he had serious character flaws. He was not meeting her expectations. She still loved him, but she was no longer in love…she wanted out of the marriage. She had married for love, but she did not marry to learn how to love such a seriously flawed man.

Most of us enter marriage with dreams and expectations. At one time we were active in our love for our spouse. Then, like ‘melittledina’, we start to see character flaws, some very serious. Then, disappointment, hurt, and bitterness build up stumblingblocks to our love.

What happened to my “Soul-Mate”

The truth is that we have this concept of “soul-mate” floating around our sub-conscious. Plato taught this before Christ was born, that somehow our souls were torn in two and there is someone out there with the other half of our soul. We get married because we think we have found our “soul-mate” and it is just so easy being around them. We have fun, we laugh, there is nothing forced about our relationship. We genuinely believe we have found the one God meant us to be married to the rest of our lives.

Love is largely a feeling that produces long conversations, walks in the park, long slow kisses, and gentle touches. Our feelings are magnified to the ‘nth’ degree. We are constantly floating on clouds.

Then we get married and life happens. Life is not easy, it is very difficult. The clouds evaporate, the long slow kisses become short little pecks, the walks in the park become falling asleep on the couch.

After months or years, as our disappointment grows and the trials increase, we find ourselves wondering about our “love” and where it went. You tell your friends that you still love your spouse, but the love has changed. The feelings are not there. You wonder about this “soul-mate” thing, especially when days go by without intimacy or involved conversation.

“Bride to Be” becomes the “Bride that Was”

Do you know the difference between the bride to be and the bride that was?

It’s not the veil, or the dress. It’s your attitude! A bride to be will not hesitate to tell you all the wonderful things her husband to be is. She can go on for 5 or 10 minutes about “he does this” and “he does that”.

When you ask that same bride about her husband 5 or 6 years later, she will generally say, well, he doesn’t do this anymore, he doesn’t do that anymore…At some point your marriage will go from “what my spouse is…” to what “my spouse isn’t…”

When we get to the point in our marriage where we define our spouse by their “faults” we find ourselves in that “struggle” phase of our relationship and we catch ourselves thinking, “I love my spouse but I am no longer in love.”

In fact, we discover we have “fallen out of love” and may have thoughts of moving on. It is a difficult situation when husbands and wives no longer feel they are in love with their partners, or no longer feel that lovely intimate connection they once enjoyed. It is at this point we are susceptible to outside influences that promise more excitement than we have at home.

This situation and thinking can lead to affairs: emotional, cyber, or physical intimate relationships outside of the marriage. This is one of the most harmful and damaging of all behaviors in a marriage, potentially ending the relationship and destroying a family.

What do we do? We embrace these three ideas and bring them into our marriage:

1. Marriage is a Love Laboratory, Not a Love Spa.
2. Marriage is a Loving Relationship, Not a Love Relationship.
3. Marriage is a Dependant Relationship, Not an Independent Relationship.

Marriage is not designed to be a series of Spa Days. You just can’t lay there while your spouse massages you 24 hours a day. In fact, most folks that have been married any length of time will tell you that marriage takes work. Now I’d like to challenge that idea just a bit. Most of us don’t associate “work” with fun and excitement. Most of us “work” to survive. While we certainly have to invest our energy, time, and effort into creating a healthy marriage and while creating a healthy marriage is not easy or simple, I believe it is better to see marriage as an open laboratory that requires our energy and effort to produce a beautiful and fulfilling and loving union.

1. Marriage Requires a Laboratory of love

• This laboratory is constantly finding what the marriage needs for proper nourishment through the various stages of life. Summer, winter, Fall, Spring.
• This laboratory is constantly finding how much energy the marriage requires at the various stages
• This laboratory requires 24/7 commitment, because the marriage is a delicate creature.
• This laboratory is a busy place, because the effort to keep the marriage flourishing requires persistence and endurance, as one who runs a marathon.
• This laboratory requires dedication, because the studying of marriage is a constant and on-going process.
• This laboratory requires creativity, because the marriage is constantly transforming into a different form requiring creative care and adjustments.
• Each day there are new variables that require our constant attention to this relationship. You can’t let your guard down, this is a 24/7 situation.

Marriage requires a Laboratory that provides nourishment, effort, energy, creativity, commitment… and most of all love.

2. Marriage requires a Loving Relationship.

There is a huge difference between love and loving.

We often, and in the above situation use the word, “love” to describe a general feeling of care or sisterly/brotherly love. “Love” could be used to describe ones feeling for the neighbor down the street or a stranger across the planet. It is a nice word that denotes concern and perhaps even a degree of empathy. In the past this form of love was called “philos” meaning deep friendship.

When a person says they love their partner but are not in love, these feelings are often that to which they refer. Loving, on the other hand is completely different. It is a powerful verb meaning you are doing something. You are acting. You are involved and active. It is a participatory word. Take a minute and ponder what it means for you to be loving. What sorts of actions do you do when you are loving another? Perhaps you are engaging in sexual intimacy? Maybe giving gifts? Maybe being kind and considerate? Maybe you are complimentary or demonstrating love in some way?

Now, here is the REALITY of “love” in marriage:

If you are not “in love” with your partner it is because YOU are not loving him or her.

• When a man says, “I love my wife but I no longer am in love with her,” it means, “my wife is a good person but I am not LOVING her”
• When a woman says, “my husband is a nice man but I am no longer in love with him”; it means “I care about my husband but I am not LOVING him”.

In other words, to truly be “in love” requires you to be actively loving your spouse! If you are not loving, you will not be “in love”.

This is a simple idea yet can have extraordinary impact on a relationship. Too often people have the mistaken notion that being “in love” just happens. This is just not so. Remaining in love with someone requires you to be loving. It requires you to engage in the relationship in loving ways. You must demonstrate and bring love to the relationship.

The more you are loving the stronger the bonds of love.

It was Jonathan Swift, the satirical author of the famous book that many of you will know from childhood, “Gulliver’s Travels”, it was he who said these words: ‘We have just enough religion to make us hate one another, but not enough religion to cause us to love one another’.

HOW DO WE TAKE A STALE MARRIAGE AND TURN IT INTO A DYNAMO OF PASSION AND LOVE?

3. We Need a DEPENDENT Relationship

I’m not talking about being dependent upon each other. Most of us are in one way or another, and that only leads to a marriage of give and take. We are all dependent upon the government, some more than others, and I don’t think that leads to a “Loving Relationship”.

What kind of dependency am I talking about? Only by depending upon God can we truly become empowered to Love our spouse as He Loves. I think we will realize this when we look at the greatest picture of “Loving” ever written by man. And it was written by someone who never married. The first three verses I have “jimized”…

1 Corinthians 13:1-3 (JMZD)

If I sing “I Love You’s” with the voice of an angel and yet do not possess God’s love for my spouse, I am just an irritating hanger clanging on the closet door.

If I can capture the eyes of my spouse with mine, and know their deepest heart’s desires, and shower them with mountains of wealth and luxury, but possess not God’s love in my heart, I am just a vanishing vapor.

If I give everything I have to my spouse and even sacrifice my life for them, and yet I possess not the very Love of God, I have accomplished nothing.

Without Agape Love Your Marriage is Nothing

The emphasis on 1 Corinthians 13 is not Love, although that certainly is the subject. The emphasis is from the phrase in verse 2 and somewhat in verse three:

ἀγάπην δὲ μὴ ἔχω (agapēn de may echo) (But Divine Love I Do Not Have) (I do not hold or possess) οὐθέν εἰμι. (outhen eimi) I am nothing

If you do not possess God’s Divine agape love in your heart toward your wife, YOUR MARRIAGE IS NOTHING!

Do You want a Nothing Marriage? Do you want to lie in a grave next to your wife and over you there is a headstone that reads “Our Marriage was Nothing!”

No! I want to say to the world Our Marriage was Something, because God was present in our marriage. We were actively Loving Him and as a result we were actively loving each other!

Paul’s Great Discourse on the Power of LOVING…

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (ESV) Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away.

Here is 1 Cor 13:4-8 in a positively translated MARRIAGE PLEDGE:

A Marriage Pledge of Active Loving

• suffereth long: I will always react to hurt with a slow boil,
• is kind:  I will always be reaching out in kindness and showing favors,
• envieth  not:  I will always share and rejoice in the experiences of my spouse,
• vaunteth  not itself:  I will always seek to honor and give to my spouse,
• is  not puffed up: I will always relate with humility and modesty,
• Doth not behave itself unseemly: I will always be orderly and controlled and comely (attractive),
• seeketh not her own: I will always seek to serve my spouse without expectations
• is not  easily provoked: I will always be emotionally involved with my spouse without being overly “touchy”,
• thinketh no evil: I will always think good or my spouse and will vaporize any hurts and unkindness
• Rejoiceth not in iniquity: I will never think or speak of the wrongs of my spouse, especially to others,
• but rejoiceth in the truth: I will courageously embrace truthfulness and honesty with my spouse,
• Beareth all things: I will always bear my spouses irritations and failures and will always cover them with God’s forgiving love,
• believeth all things: I will always believe the best of my spouse
• hopeth all things: I will never cease to hope for God’s best in our marriage,
• endureth all things: I will actively stand against any attacks or failings that threaten our love,
• Charity never faileth: I will actively love my spouse forever!

If you desire a Sacred Marriage, to be TOTALLYMARRIED according to God’s Design, you must realize, you must fully embrace that Marriage is to be an ACTION VERB, not just a state of mind. It is to be not a LOVE RELATIONSHIP, but a LOVING RELATIONSHIP! Most importantly, you must realize that no man or woman can love their spouse with the ‘AGAPE’ love described in Romans 13. We must be dependent upon God for this LOVE. And if we possess God’s AGAPE Love in our heart, we will see that it is a dynamic force for LOVING our spouse. The Bible makes this abundantly clear:

The Bible Puts the LOVING in LOVE!

1. Put on love Colossians 3:14 (ESV)

• And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.

2. Follow after love 1 Corinthians 14:1 (ESV)

• Pursue love, and earnestly desire the spiritual gifts, especially that you may prophesy.

3. Abound in love Philippians 1:9 (ESV)

• And it is my prayer that your love may abound more and more, with knowledge and all discernment,

4. Continue in love Hebrews 13:1 (NLT)

• Keep on loving each other as brothers and sisters. Keep on keeping on…

5. Increase in love 1 Thessalonians 3:12 (ESV)

• and may the Lord make you increase and abound in love for one another and for all, as we do for you,

6. Be fervent in love 1 Peter 4:8 (NKJV)

• And above all things have fervent love for one another, for “love will cover a multitude of sins.”

7. Spur each other to love Hebrews 10:24 (ESV)

• And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works

1 Corinthians 16:14 (NIV) Do everything in love.

How to Turn a Nothing Marriage into Something

Marriage is an Impossible Union without the Agape Love of Jesus Christ Loving through you. The sooner you surrender your heart to allow God to Love through you, the Sooner you can become TotallyMarried according to God’s Design.

Let’s see how we can possess God’s AGAPE love. Let’s see how God can take a nothing and make him a something. God does the same for our marriages, making them dynamo’s of His Love.

1 Corinthians 1:26-31 (KJV) For ye see your calling, brethren, how that not many wise men after the flesh, not many mighty, not many noble, are called: But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty; And base things of the world, and things which are despised, hath God chosen, yea, and things which are not, to bring to nought things that are: That no flesh should glory in his presence. But of him are ye in Christ Jesus, who of God is made unto us wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and redemption and _____________: That, according as it is written, He that glorieth, let him glory in the Lord.

Of God are we IN CHRIST JESUS, who of God is made unto us whatever we need – love for our spouse…

We must come to the place where we realize we cannot love our spouse the way God loves them. We must see ourselves as nothing before God. He wants no pride in our lives. He wants only His strength and His love in our lives. So we go through the Cross in our marriage, realizing that we do not have His love, that we are nothing, and then we say, “Christ lives in me!, All that He has is mine. Christ is AGAPE Love! Let me be a channel of His AGAPE Love! Once we kneel before Him as nothing, through Jesus Christ, God makes us SOMETHING! He fills us with the most powerful Love in the universe – HIS LOVE!

God’s love must be allowed to energize you. YOU hold the key to how much you love and how much you are in love with your partner. YOU have it in your mind and heart to act lovingly or not. YOU have it in your power to be loving.But you must be willing to allow God to channel His love through you, to love even the ugliness in your spouse that you have been unable to.

Love is not something that just happens. And remaining in love with your partner most definitely will not happen unless you give everything you have to God and then allow Him to change your heart. You must become “loving’ toward your spouse.

Notice how it may feel to tell your spouse, “I am loving you,” rather than, “I love you.” The first describes something you are doing, not just something that may be a feeling similar to how you feel about your childhood friend of long ago. To help you see what it means to be ‘loving’ I recommend you have this ‘Loving Kit’ handy at all times.

The Loving Kit for Sacred Marriages

• Toothpick: Matthew 7:1 Always pick out the good qualities in your spouse
• Rubber Band: Romans 8:28 Be flexible, things do not always go the way you want.
• Band-Aid: Colossians 3:12-14 Take time to offer a healing hand, one full of love & grace.
• Pencil: Ephesians 1:3 Write down a blessing because of your spouse; add to your list of blessings daily.
• Eraser: Romans 3:23 Erase the mistakes your spouse makes as they happen.
• Mint: Proverbs 11:25 Do something to refresh your spouse as you enjoy this mint.
• Hugs & Kisses: 1 Peter 5:14 Don’t let the sun go down without giving your spouse at least one kiss & hug.
• Teabag: 1 Thessalonians 5:18 Stop, relax, and thank God for your spouse. Then thank them. Thankfulness goes a long way.

In order to Possess the Love of God in your heart, you probably need to do some HEART cleaning first.

Prepare Your Heart to Be Loving

If there is any resentment, any hatred, any hurt, any bitterness, any wrong relationships, any regrets, anything you are not thankful for, any wrong doing you are holding onto. You can’t have the Love of God because He doesn’t have all of your heart. You are blocking Him from some area of your life. If your spouse has wronged you and you haven’t forgiven them, you are blocking that area of your heart from God’s love. You will not hold the love of God in your heart!

Here’s what you need to do right now: Give your entire heart to God-all the pieces-all the rooms. Hold nothing back. Give your spouse to God; give all those expectations, that honey do list that never gets done. Give it all and say God, fill me with your love and allow that love to overflow toward my spouse.

If you want to rediscover those lost feelings for your spouse start by changing the way you view him. Falling into a trap where you only see the negatives in your husband is very easy to do. Make a concerted effort to only focus on the positive parts of him. Be vocal about how much you appreciate those things about him. Tell him and tell others. The more you verbalize what you find appealing about him, the more you’ll start to recognize and appreciate it.

Start doing small things for your spouse again. Quite often when a wife (or husband) starts to fall out of love with her husband she also begins to neglect him. If you did certain things early in the marriage, such as making his lunch, cooking his favorite dinner or washing his clothes, do that again. Once you start taking the time to do things for him you’ll likely see a change in him too. He’ll also want to do more for you which will help you to recognize those qualities in him that first attracted you to him.

The Loving Dare:

On two pieces of paper write the three questions below. Each partner gets one sheet of paper.

Both you and your partner answer the questions then guess how your partner will answer them. (Four answers each). Share your thoughts! Discuss your answers! Then throw it away (or give them to God. Remember, Agape Loving is not about you and your expectations, it is about being a channel of GOD’S LOVE. So while it helps to see your spouses wants and needs and be willing to meet them, you must do the thirds step in our Loving Dare, you must daily ask God to love your spouse through you in a way they have never been loved before.

The three questions:

1. What can I do to make our marriage better?
2. What would my spouse like me to do to keep our marriage alive and vibrant?
3. God, will you love my spouse through me as they’ve never been loved before?

The Ring of Death Silenced by Love

In seventeenth-century England during the time of General Cromwell, a soldier was condemned to die by execution at the ringing of the curfew bell. This soldier, however, was engaged to be married to a beautiful young girl. With tears, the girl pleaded with the judge and with Cromwell to spare his young life. But it was all in vain. The preparations were made for the execution, and the city awaited the signal from the bell at curfew. The sexton, who was old and deaf, threw himself against the rope, as he had for years. He pulled it and pulled it and pulled it, not realizing that no sound was coming from the bell. The girl had climbed to the top of the belfry, and had reached out, caught, and held on to the tongue of the huge bell at the risk of her life. As the sexton rang it, she was smashed against the sides of the bell…but the bell was silent. At length, the bell ceased to swing, and she managed to descend from the tower, wounded and bleeding. Cromwell, waiting at the place of execution, wanted to know why the bell had not rung. The girl arrived and told him what she had done. A poet recorded it for all time. This is what he said:

At his feet she told her story,
Showed her hands all bruised and torn;
And her sweet young face, still haggard
With the anguish it had worn;
Touched his heart with sudden pity,
Lit his eyes with misty light:
“Go, your lover lives,” said Cromwell,
“Curfew will not ring tonight.”

To what lengths are you prepared to go to silence the clanging, the arguing, the discord in your marriage.

To what lengths are you willing to go to change wrong and disrespectful attitudes built up over the years.

To what lengths are you willing to go to be Loving toward your spouse.

Are you willing to give your heart to God and be used by Him to be a channel of His love toward your spouse. Are you willing to let Gid use you to be actively loving toward His Son or daughter?

God has always been actively Loving you through His Son

Because of Jesus willing to go to the Cross, God threw a mantle over your sins, over every hurt and pain you caused Him, and He took the punishment for your sins, and not only that, he sympathised with our sinful flesh, and through the Power of the Cross offers us a way to be transformed from selfish sinners into Loving Saints. Sin, Satan and death have all been defeated through the cross, and you can share in that when you live your life by the Power of the Loving Cross.

That’s what God did for us. He didn’t just send a note to us saying He loved us. He didn’t just give us a loving kit. He sent His son to visibly express his Loving Heart & Ways!

Powerpoint

Sermon Video

Hi! Eu sunt Lilly si sunt dependenta de reclame! Imi plac reclamele! chiar foarte mult.

Sunt unele companii care stiu sa-si vanda produsele printr-o reclama buna, una din ele este Orange-ul. Mereu are reclame frumoase, atragatoare, si isi alege melodiile de fundal cele mai potrivite. Le fredonez toata ziua.

Ultima reclama are melodia asta :

Fredonati si voi!

I didn’t get married until the age of 41.  I told family and friends that I was just waiting for the guy brave enough to take that step.  One of my friends joked in reply that what I was really waiting for was a guy that was a better man than I was.  Given that he was looking for a better woman than he was, it made sense.

There are advantages to getting married at a later age than most.  I had college behind me, was well-established in my administrative career, owned my car, had decent furniture, and most of the other stuff people acquire to make their homes and lives a little easier.  I’d been an independent adult for over twenty years, making my own life decisions, handling my own money, going when I wanted to go, eating what I wanted to eat, and playing when I wanted to play.

And, ironically, that same independence can be somewhat disadvantageous once you’re married.  Now I was in a partnership, with an individual who was just as independent, just as established in his career, had just as much stuff, and was just as stubborn as I was.  Thankfully, we were on the same page with most things, and we quickly came to the decision that we were just going to have a yours, mine and ours kind of arrangement.  We each kept our individual bank accounts, credit cards, cars, and stuff, while opening joint accounts for the household.  Things that were going to benefit both of us, like the house payment, groceries, utilities, etc., would be paid from the household account.  Items that would only benefit or be used by one person would be paid by that person.  So, when he wants to buy more tools for his workshop, he dips into his personal account.  When I want to buy more silk embroidery floss for my next needlework project, that’s on me.  We each contribute a set amount into the household account every month.  Given that I was bringing in about 60% of the joint income, my contribution to the household was slightly larger than his, but still giving both of us plenty of left over cash to play with.  This arrangement worked amazingly well, until that fateful day in April.

So now I’m on unemployment, which nets significantly less than that nice regular paycheck.  Every penny the state sends me gets put into the household account, because our budget was based on the working income.  The hubby, I think a little to his chagrin, can not support the entire household just on his income.  Much like so many other Americans these days.  Unfortunately, what I get on unemployment isn’t quite up to the level I was contributing while working, so the household belt has tightened to a dangerously thin point.  After years of just being able to pay the bills without really worrying, going out to dinner if we wanted, buying something for the house if we liked it, we are now back to being serious jugglers and tap dancers.  The holidays are looking especially bleak.

And that’s when I noticed that damn box.  The first wall went up when I lost the job – no big deal, just go around.  The second wall went up when the depression came crashing back with a blinding force of will – okay, we can still manage, with a little guidance from the counselor.  The third wall went up when I no longer had my own money.  That was a tough one – I could no longer buy things when I wanted to.  I couldn’t pay my credit card bills, couldn’t buy lunch out if I was running errands, couldn’t even get my husband an  anniversary card.  I was having to ask him for permission to use household funds to pay for my personal bills.  Did not like that at all.

Okay, so I still have one way out.  I don’t have to be in a box.  But then the car registration showed up.  Our lovely three-year-old truck was going to cost us nearly 25% more to register this year than last year.  Welcome to California, now give us all your money.  Money we don’t have, if we want to still pay the house payment.  And that was one of the life lessons drilled into both of us from an early age: ALWAYS PAY YOUR HOUSING COSTS!!!  Don’t pass go, don’t buy lotto tickets, don’t buy cigarettes, booze or even food, if it means not paying the house payment or the rent.  That leaves only one option, unless I have a rich uncle who’s died and left me a large inheritance: we have to PNO the truck.  That means the truck sits in the drive way and goes no where else until we can get the regular registration.  That means I have no vehicle while my husband is at work.  That means careful planning if I need to go somewhere, because public transit in our area ain’t what it should be.  There’s always the bicycle, but I’d have to shell out some money to repair it.  So after over two decades of vehicular independence, I’m stuck.

The weird thing is, I’m a bit agoraphobic and really don’t like leaving the house if I don’t have to.  But it really hit me when I realized I just seen that last wall drop.   No job, no money, no car, and no way out.  I was now completely dependent on someone else to take care of me, for the first time since I was a child.   Much as I love, trust and cherish my husband, much as he does his best to be supportive, understanding and sympathetic, I just couldn’t deal with the idea of being so vulnerable.  Too many years of taking care of myself, making my own money, handling my own affairs, without having to ask anybody else’s permission.  In short, I freaked.

So here I am, sitting at the bottom of this big ol’ box of trouble, my eyes blood shot and stinging from the panicked crying, my head hurting from banging it against the walls, my nails bloodied from digging at the floor, wondering if I could braid my hair into a long enough rope to get my butt out of here.  I still have my brain and my Gerber multi-tool.  I just might be able to reach the top…

© 2009  Cheri K. Endsley   All Rights Reserved.

Story from the UK Daily Mail. (H/T Ace of Spades via ECM)

Excerpt:

A man thought by doctors to be in a vegetative state for 23 years was actually conscious the whole time, it was revealed last night.

Student Rom Houben was misdiagnosed after a car crash left him totally paralysed.

He had no way of letting experts, family or friends know he could hear every word they said.

‘I screamed, but there was nothing to hear,’ said Mr Houben, now 46.

Doctors used a range of coma tests, recognised worldwide, before reluctantly concluding that his consciousness was ‘extinct’.

But three years ago, new hi-tech scans showed his brain was still functioning almost completely normally.

[...]Mr Houben said: ‘I shall never forget the day when they discovered what was truly wrong with me – it was my second birth.

‘I want to read, talk with my friends via the computer and enjoy my life now that people know I am not dead.’

What are we to make of the Terri Schiavo killers now? Is it morally praiseworthy to advocate for getting rid of inconvenient people? Shouldn’t we look on the misfortunes of others as opportunities to act out our love and compassion for our fellow man? Doctors can be wrong in their diagnoses.

I’m not me anymore.. Aşa cum nici tu nu mai eşti tu şi nimeni nu mai e aşa cum trebuie să fie pentru că lumea asta e plină doar de proşti ce s-au iubit. Şi mai era scena aia când cerul îmi ploua în suflet şi cuvintele de după ce ai plecat.. cu “don’t look back”. Şi de ce era ploaia de vină?

Nu mai ai nici-un sens amice, şi te-aş ruga să te duci în mami ta, pentru că da..acum  ştiu you were not trying to wreck my life, you were trying to make yours better. Şi acum încerc să use somebody dar nu someone like you and all you know and how you speak. Cineva? Mă ajută şi pe mine cineva?

Şi cu ce era mă ploaia de vină?

Team jacob. For sure.

I’ve never read the books, but i’ve seen the movies (ha a NORMAL amount of times, unlike some people i know).

I saw New Moon today. Jacob. I really like him. I mean, i REALLY like him. When he was leaning in the car, begging for her to stay, i was like, swoon! if it was real, i mean, what an IDIOT she is. Who would want to live forever as a half life on earth? Has she completly lost her mind?

Well, yeah, she has–Edward leaves and she turns into a stone and screams at night for like FIVE MONTHS? okay–i understand she’s sad. she loves him. but come on.

she is a terrible influence. being with edward continues to control her happiness. its total endorsement for dependency on men as such (i think) a young age. she totally lets go of her friends and who she is. she loses her freaking mind.

it was funny though–the audience members were divided; when edward walked up on screen, some people cheered, and when jacob did, others (me included) cheered. which is so weird to me. jacob seems so obvious.

anyway. i guess it was pretty good.

Or, it would have been pretty good if she had chosen jacob. it’s amazing how that movie created such a  tense atmosphere between them. just kiss him!

arggggg

Formal authority can be thought of as the right to command or compel another person to perform a certain act. Power is the ability to influence or cause a person to perform an act. It is possible for a manager to have formal authority without power, just as it is possible for a subordinate to have power without formal authority. The distinction between these terms may be significant for the manager, who may assume that his formal authority automatically gives him power but overlook the fact that his subordinates also have power, at times greater than his own. The manager in such a situation can encounter difficult and frustrating experiences without knowing why.

If formal authority were dependent upon physical power only, life would be even more difficult than it is. Ultimately, formal authority is dependent upon the law, but most frequently it results from a  shared perception that those with formal authority have rights that ought to be acknowledged. This “ought” is so widely believed that those with formal authority may very frequently have real power as a result.

My Consultancy–Asif J. Mir - Management Consultant–transforms organizations where people have the freedom to be creative, a place that brings out the best in everybody–an open, fair place where people have a sense that what they do matters. For details please visit www.asifjmir.com, and my Lectures.

Is it possible to get enough of God?

Is it possible to get too much of God?

I would say a resounding NO to both of these questions.  If we can’t ever get enough of God then the question becomes “how do we get more of God”? There is always more of His character to discover.  More of His love to experience.  More of his power to be used for His purposes.  More, more, more…

What measures are people willing to take when they want more of something?  Are they willing to change priorities?  Are they willing to give up anything?  Are they willing to lose friends or even family?  Am I willing?  Are you willing?

I know that we can’t get too much of God.  I’ve never seen anyone or heard of anyone that had too much of God.  If that is the case then why don’t we seek more of Him?  He wants to give us more of Himself.  When we get more of God, we get more of everything we are needing spiritually.

I’m not satisfied.  I want more.  How can we be satisfied with the amount of intimacy, knowledge, power, or love of God we have or experience?  He always leaves me wanting more.  Not because he can’t fill me, but because when you taste of God and see how good He is, you simply just can’t get enough.  Every encounter with God only causes us to thirst and hunger for Him more.

Maybe the problem isn’t actually even “getting” enough of God.  Maybe the problem is that we don’t actually “give” enough of ourselves to Him?  Maybe we are holding back.  I know I hold back.  I don’t want to hold anything back but I know that when i’m honest with myself, I’m holding back.  The pursuit of happiness instead of the pursuit of God.  The pursuit of success instead of the pursuit of Jesus.  The pursuit of “approval” instead of the pursuit of the Holy Spirit.  That is just a few things that I know get in the way sometimes.

The problem with this is that when I read the scriptures I see men and women  fully surrendered to God and my desire for that “lifestyle” intensifies.  I see men and women completely dependent upon the Holy Spirit and they display a life that I want.  I want more.  It’s not enough to talk about it.  It’s not enough to go through the motions.  It’s not enough to do things the same way they’ve always been done with no reason except that it’s just the way it’s always been done!

When i’m hungry or thirsty, I begin to make plans to fill those desires.  Some of my plans change.  Meetings get moved around.  My hunger or thirst drives my schedule.  I have a serious hunger and thirst for God.  His power, His love, His grace, His mercy, I could go on and on.  Am I making plans to fill those desires?  Or am I afraid of being inconvenienced or even embarrassed for being an “extreme” christian.  I say we give God everything, every part of ourselves, everything.  The rewards are great.  The reward is our Father.  His son, Jesus.  And His Holy Spirit.

Give Him more….

Give me more…

Jeff Burnett *fightforgrace*

  ” Iubirea este o zana rea, J.  Si este atat de aproape de tradare, ura si control incat ma sperie. Nu vreau sa ajung sa te urasc niciodata. Nu vreau sa ajung sa consideri ca imi apartii. Nu vreau sa ma intreb ce vorbesti, cu cine vorbesti, de ce vii,  cand vii, de ce nu vii cind nu vii. Nu vreau sa conditionez ce iti ofer de ce imi oferi. Nu vreau sa imi doresc sa te schimb. ACUM esti perfect. Si vreau sa te vad intoteauna astfel. Al tau, nu al meu – liber, imprevizibil, cu gesturi neasteptat de calde uneori,  cu dileme copilaresti alteori, puternic, inteligent si rebel. Stiu, este o masca. Dar iubesc aceasta masca. Pentru ca nu te cunosc altfel. Si nu stiu – vreau sa te cunosc altfel? Esti eroul meu Vreau, de fapt, sa descopar un barbat banal in spatele lui?

Vreau sa imi insinuez incet personalitatea proprie? Vreau sa te fac dependent de mine – cand orice dependenta este un lant? Vreau sa fii fericit datorita mie, si vreau sa suferi datorita mie, cand stiu foarte bine ca toate acestea sunt conditionari? Te vreau mai aproape decat esti acum? Si cum te-as putea avea mai aproape fara sa ma schimb si fara sa te schimb? Fara ca unul dintre noi sau amindoi sa ingenunchem? Sintem spirite trufase – cate sabii ar sclipi intre noi doi, daca ne-am dezlega orgoliile, J? Cite cutii ale Pandorei am deschide? Ce ar fi acea farima fragila de suflet cind “noi” s-ar spulbera in mii de “eu” si “tu”? Ce sanse ar avea? Ne-am transforma in ce? In ce s-au transformat atitia oameni pina la noi… Priveste restul oamenilor, priveste-le ochii, si ai sa vezi.

Iubirea este o zana rea, J – asa este si a mea. Cunosti foarte putin din mine – si aici se opreste tot ce am bun. N-am nimic altceva. Stai la distanta de la care iti par frumoasa. Ramai acolo. Prefer sa te sarut in gand in fiecare noapte – sa fiu cadina care tese firul seherazadei, si atat. ”

You know I’ve done all I can
You see I begged, stole
And I borrowed
Ooh, that’s why I’m easy
I’m easy like Sunday morning

The question is, how much do you spare your partner from knowing if it means shouldering the stress and decision-making yourself?  Why keep any secrets from him at all?  Because he doesn’t manage it well and it’d only increase his pain further and he’s already incapacitated by it.

The thought of breaking up because we can’t maintain this lifestyle, leaving him homeless and me shattered, that was making me go nutty this morning.  Sure, living within my means is essential, but isn’t it just as essential for me to make this possiblewhile not giving up the person I thought I was spending my life with?

So I spoke to him and he’s agreed and that’s a relief to know we’re on the same page.

We’ll have to move to low-income housing once he gets disability.  Between the two of us, we can make any home lovely.  We also need to get Sophie and Delilah certified as pet therapy dogs so they’ll be allowed into a building.  Once that takes place, we may even be able to live without financial assistance from my parents.

This promise to them may not solve everything, but it will buy us more time with my parents.  It really does bring home how I’m a dependent of theirs, how they could undo everything if they didn’t accept how I lived.  I’m glad frank understands.

Of course, all this is assuming there’ll be housing available when we need it.  But I can’t stress about that now.  The key right now is to have a plan.  One way or another, we’ll make it work.

Time to downsize.

But it strikes me just now, for someone as unfiltered as I am, I make such an effort to shield Frank from stress, to protect him.  I know this says a lot about how we were raised and have managed to cope with life’s stressors, but my therapist tells me to be solution-focused, not problem-focused, so the thing for me to do is be more open to Frank and  trust tat he can deal with the truth, not agonize over what I worry he may might not like to hear.

What is sovereignty and does anyone still have any?

We can build our lives upon many different things. It may be a hobby or a relationship, an experience or a religion. When these things become our priority, it is these that our lives become rooted in. They become our foundation and if that foundation is not stable and reliable, then the whole house is placed at risk of collapse.

I was once drawn to a Psalm that it seems apt to address here. It draws a distinct contrast between two different lifestyles. In Psalm 1 it says ‘Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked, or stand in the way of sinners, or sit in the seat of mockers. But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night,’ [v.1-2].

This man is choosing to live in a godly way. He keeps good company, he takes delight in the living righteously and following Gods commands and he even takes deep consideration over the law of God. The word meditate in today’s language has many connotations but it simply means ‘to chew on or over.’ Some people say that we are supposed to chew our food 15-20 times before swallowing to ensure that we properly digest our food and get all the goodness out of it. It is the same with God’s word, the Bible. It is very easy to read a passage because it’s that time of the day, or that day of the week, and we easily dilute its power because we do not allow the word of God to take deep root; we are not chewing over the word.

I love the simile that is depicted here for describing this man. ‘He shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that brings forth its fruit in its season, whose leaf also shall not wither; And whatever he does shall prosper,’ [v.3].  This man has deep roots, but not only are they deep, they are also in a good supply; in the rivers of water. This supply produces three beneficial outcomes, according to the Psalmist. Firstly, this person is producing fruit, as any tree should. Good things are coming out of this man’s life. The positive seed which he has chosen to cultivate produces good fruit in his life. Secondly, his leaf does not wither. All deciduous trees go through cycles each year of the dying and reproducing of leaves, but this man’s leaves do not wither. Why? Because he is connected to a good supply; a supply that does not waver like the signal on the mobile phone, but is consistent, reliable and never fails. Thirdly, whatever he does shall prosper. Imagine if that in all you pursued you would not fail but rather prosper. Prospering does not necessarily mean living lavishly, having a big car, big house and beautiful wife. More simply it means ‘that it goes well with you.’ When our actions and attitudes come out of our link to the power supply of God, then we can trust that the Lord will direct our paths and it will go well for us.

That man fully depended upon the supply of that metaphorical river and as a result experienced tremendous benefits to his every day life. He was not confident in his own resources or vain in thinking that his way was best, but rather submitted himself to a greater supply, humbling himself to God’s ultimate provision.  As new-born babies we depend entirely on our carer for everything. We cannot feed ourselves, clothe ourselves or even wash ourselves; someone has to help us. As we grow older, we gradually become more and more self-sufficient and we are able to provide and support ourselves. However, as we become more senior in years, we become less able and begin once again to depend on others.

My mom recently recounted how, when taking my grandparents out in the car for the day, she had to help them into their seats, help them with their seatbelts and even put the safety lock on the electric windows so that they would not be inadvertently shocked by a sudden blast of air! The man in the Psalm however learned to lean on a greater supply regardless of his age or ability. It didnt matter that he could have been self-sufficient, he decided to submit himself to a life-supply he knew nothing else could offer. 1 Peter 2v1 says, ‘Therefore, laying aside all malice, all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and all evil speaking, as newborn babes, desire the pure milk of the word, that you may grow thereby, if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is gracious.’

God’s supply is always there for us. The river is always running; it never dries up. The word of God, the Bible, can be our life-supply. It can be the solid ground upon which our lives can be established and our roots can remain strong.

Just briefly let us consider the contrasting lifestyle described in this verse 4 of this Psalm. ‘The ungodly are not so, but are like chaff which the wind drives away.’  In the dictionary the word chaff means ‘anything light and worthless.’ In sharp contrast, the ungodly man isn’t connected to the river and in fact doesn’t appear to have any roots at all, but is rather blown about, being shaken by every circumstance that comes his way, unable to depend upon anything accept his own efforts and performance. He fails to humble himself to anybody’s help or instruction, but is rather vainly puffed up in his own opinions, attitudes and ideas, under the deception that he always knows best.

So the question comes to us. Which man do we most identify with? Do we have roots and if so what are they in? When difficulties come our way how do we respond? Does God’s word rise up within and its power made manifest in what could be dismal situations or are we blown about, knocked down and overcome by difficulties? We can build our lives upon all sorts of foundations, but will those foundations remain strong under pressure and last into eternity?

My best friend, my closest friend, my source of strength, my energy outlet, had her phone cut off.

I had never realised how dependent I was on texting her everything…

So here goes my survival log. It’s just a nameless diary. I would normally tell my closest friend all of this…

Survival Day#1

My day…

1st block
I felt bad bad bad that I got … in trouble. I was honest to the teacher. But it made me feel bad.

2nd block
I lost my folder. Damn. I’m in trouble. I hope it shows up tomorrow, or I’m fucked.
I started noticing I was feeling detached from everyone. I had been feeling detached all morning. I just noticed it by this time.

3rd block
… commented the apple and orange I brought to class. It made me fuzzy inside. … and … moved from their old seats. The detachedness was growing. … was extra nice to me just because … had moved. …’s so clingy. He won’t go anywhere alone. It’s sad.

4th block
I’m not getting any better in orchestra. I was feeling really offset. I got my notes jumbled up in my head. I couldn’t count. I wanted to check the time… But I had taken off my watch, and I didn’t want to look at my phone.

After School
I was looking for … and instead I saw … . I tried to make a run for it, but he caught up to me :]. We fought. I ran into a door. Was I distracted, clumsy? Or was it the detachedness, or the new buzzy dizziness that cramped my head? The sun was really bright, brighter than normal, as I panicked to find my bus. I should have waved to my friends… But my arm wouldn’t obey me.
Should I start a riot to make my school life more exciting? Someone suggested this to me.

Home
All the windows were open. Including mine, as in someone went into my room without permission. Also, a lot of my laundry was gone.
As I was eating my cheeseburger, it occurred to me I had eaten a cheeseburger at lunch. At the time, it baffled me as I tried to find logic in that (?!).
I did my daily internet thing. Check sites, email, play.
There’s a movie called “Ring”. I really want to watch it, but at the same time I don’t because I get frightened easily.
I love the Phantom of the Opera.
I used to have all the lyrics of all the songs memorised. Now, I have forgotten most of them.
My mom is so argumentative with me. It’s tiring. I wonder if my planets have anything to do with this tension.

No details…

Now
I feel dizzy. Like there’s a storm that’s about to rage a headache in the front. Front of what? I don’t know. I think about the smell of bubble gum, and I feel like vomiting.

I think I’m really dependent…

-Izzy

P.S. My gaming computer broke!!! I’m getting a new computer in general… But argh! So much wasted time!
P.S.S. I’m getting a new digital camera and camcorder too.
P.S.S.S. I think I’m sick…

This short article gives a brief introduction on applying waveshaping algorithms not directly in the audio path but via a transformed equation through the sidechain and a VCA instead.

Typical saturation curves

As mentioned earlier before in this article, waveshaping can be seen and applied quite similar to compression techniques via its computation in a separate sidechain path. This way, the algorithm does not work anymore on the audio path in a direct fashion but only on the sidchain part and the outcome then drives the main audio via a VCA. The actual used algorithm has to be properly transformed math wise to work in a sidechain configuration and the transformation depends on if the sidechain operates on log encoded audio or does work in linear scale.

So, why could this be more favourable compared to a direct implementation?

Some experimental transformed curves (linear scale)

One big advantage could be that filter and phase alterings upfront the waveshaping (to shape its frequency response) does not translate back into the originial audio source since due to the VCA only amplitude modulation (by a DC signal) is performed in the end.  Given this method a circuit designer is able to e.g. setup frequency dependent saturation behaviour without the need to filter and compromise the original signal. Even some artifacts of oversampling can be reduced to some extend if its specific use is limited to just parts of the sidechain and not the entire signal chain. However, normally the VCA would be oversampled as well to minimize the intermodulation distortion.

Even more sophisticated waveshaping processing such as combinations with envelope and transient processing or frequency split techniques are now easily possible without touching the integrity of the main audio path.

Suntem in 2009, secolul vitezei, era high-tech. Cum poti sa ramai neatins de “minunile” tehnicii moderne ? Aproape imposibil. Televizoare, telefoane mobile, calculatoare, internetul … nu mai sunt elemente care definesc statutul social de inalt nivel.  Nuuu.. acum ele sunt o necesitate,  elemente de baza ale societatii moderne, lucruri zilnice, uzuale, fara de care nu ai putea traii ..

Acum serios vorbind, fiecare dintre noi avem lucruri sau obiceiuri de care suntem dependenti . La mine nu e vorba de o dependeta nociva ( tigari, bautura, etc. ) ci e vorba de muzica. In fiecare zi trebuie sa ascult cel putin 3 ore ( adunate mai multe “parti”) de muzica. Nu conteaza gen ( rap, hip`hop, pop, r&b,etc) conteaza doar sa fie placuta urechilor mele Nu stiu ce as face o zi fara muzica, probabil as innebunii ( mai rau decat sunt nu cred ca e posibil, dar de ce as risca? )

Tu de ce lucruri sau obiceiuri esti dependent ?

Money and family can be a toxic combination. For the past five years I was financially supporting my mother who refused to get a job. She gave excuse after excuse so I decided last year to cut her off. Every pair of shoes I saw her buy, every item of clothing from the mall she acquired made me sick inside. I kept my mouth shut because I’m a people pleaser AND hate confrontation. That’s a toxic combination as well. Finally I’d had enough of watching her blow through dollar after dollar so I cut her. Let’s just say I used to be her favorite daughter… not so much anymore.
I saw a side of my mother I had never seen before. I had no idea how spiteful and cruel she could be. I’ve spent my entire life desperately seeking her approval, and now in her eyes I’m a selfish bitch who won’t allow her to stay at home and not work.
If I could go back in time, I never would have allowed any of my (very capable, able-bodied) family members to be financially dependent on me. The burden feels overwhelming.

Sometimes when I look into the mirror I see a very tired man.  At other times I look into the mirror and see someone who looks like they could go out and conquer the world.  What’s the difference?  Both images are of the same man…….or are they?  I mean, I know that of course it is the same man but I have to wonder where such polar opposite views come from.  I like the view of the man that can go out and conquer anything but in the back of my mind I also know that that man sometimes forgets to be 100% dependent on God.  I want to be dependent on God.  I don’t like it when I peer into the mirror and see a tired man, but on the other hand, that man is normally quick to run to God for security, peace, and strength.  Can’t I have my cake and eat it too?  Is it too much to ask to feel like I can conquer the world every day and yet stay dependent on God?

I started getting up earlier about 2 months ago and spending time in the word and in prayer.  This has really helped me stay dependent on God.  I think I have caught a glimpse of why Jesus used to get up so early and go spend time with the Father.  I’m beginning to think that if we are not setting aside specific time with our Father we cannot live the life we desire. (the conqueror lifestyle)  My friend and pastor, Justen, reminded me a few weeks ago that direction, not intention, gets me to my destination.  I am very good at having good intentions.

Maybe when I look into the mirror and see a tired man it is because all these great intentions I have are not getting me to where I want to go….?

Some of my greatest intentions never make it from my head to my hands and/or feet.  I hate that.  I’m telling you, I have some awesome intentions.  And I can honestly say that most of my intentions are good, even Godly.  I am going to start praying that my intentions become action…direction.

Ok, back to my thoughts on the tired man and “conqueror” man.  While I was typing this the Lord put Ephesians 6:10 on my heart. “Be strong in the Lord and in His mighty power.”  I see that twice this references Jesus.  1)strong in the Lord 2)in His mighty power.  I can be strong, but it must be in the Lord.  I must live in His mighty power.  Sometimes when we experience success on our own we seem to think we can continue on our own.  I know I’m guilty as charged.  I don’t want to be successful on my own power.

I know that it is possible to live every moment of life dependent on God and also live strong and confident.  You know what I think?  I think that intentions actually come from God!  I think he places these desires in our heart and then we have the choice on how we are going to live our life.  Are we going to live with these intentions in our heart and experience the “tiredness” of never fulfilling what God desires or are we going to take these God-given intentions and make them happen?  As for me, I choose the latter.  I choose to not let my intentions stay just that, intentions.

Will you join me??

Jeff Burnett *fightforgrace*

No college student should be forced into the decision of staying in school or taking care of their health. Unfortunately, health plans have had the right to drop students from their parents plans unless a full load of courses were being met per semester. For students who became seriously ill, that meant either continuing to be a full-time student while battling the illness, or taking a break from school and forgoing health insurance. But a new federal law taking effect today will change the rules so that students won’t have to make that choice anymore.

The law is called “Michelle’s Law,” named after the college student who was forced to study full time to avoid losing health coverage while battling (and eventually succumbing to) colon cancer. It will allow dependents to take up to a year off school while still maintaining health coverage. Thousands of college students across the country are expected to benefit from it. It’s a great idea, and it’s a little surprising we’ve gone on this long without having a sensible law like this in place.

Read more about this news from the AP.

Some people are lucky enough to be raised by two strong parents who are committed to each other and their family.  I was lucky enough to be raised that way.  It wasn’t until I ventured out into the world that I realized I was what appeared to be a minority.

As I met new people and explored new relationships I started to realize how special my childhood was and how blessed I was to be raised with such a strong foundation, sense of self and confidence to achieve anything I set my mind to.

Over the years I have met people that on the surface appear to be confident and determined, but when the glitter fades they appear the most lonely and vulnerable of all.

I am sure you can relate to the type of person who drives a fancy car, a BMW or Mercedes perhaps, wears diamonds and talks about how “successful” they are and puts on a facade appearing to be such a hard valiant worker driven to “succeed.”  They spend their whole lives chasing what they believe will make them admired and complete, sacrificing quality time with people they love and passing by life’s most precious moments like watching the sunset with the one that they love.  Somehow the chase for the validating happiness continues day after day like a never-ending hamster wheel. No matter how hard they chase, it’s never enough.  The people closest to them feel pushed away and unimportant the chasers miss out on happiness all together.

If you spend your whole life searching for happiness in material things, money or admiration from others, you will always be at the mercy of the chase and you will always be dependent.  Happiness and contentment comes from within.  Be at peace with who you are.

The only thing we truly need in this world is to be loved, feel love and give love.  We want to love what we do, love someone and be loved by someone. That’s it.  It’s that simple.  I promise.  Yes there are things like fancy cars, traveling the world and diamonds and pearls, but if you don’t have anyone to share them with they are all meaningless.

You can’t take anything with you when you go, but the love and happiness that discover within and share with those you love will live on for generations to come.  Be proud of who you are.  Lay a solid foundation for the future generations remember tomorrow is promised to no one.  If you’re on the hamster wheel of life, get off!  Life is too precious and too short to cheat yourself out of true happiness.

Slow down, take note and live to the fullest, living, laughing and loving.

• Definition of “Depend” from the Merriam-Webster Dictionary: 

1 : to be determined, based, or contingent <life depends on food> <the value of Y depends on X>
2 : to be pending or undecided
3 a : to place reliance or trust <you can depend on me> b : to be dependent especially for financial support
4 : to hang down

• Famous quotes:

I have heard the sayings, “I am independent”. “I do everything by myself”. “I depend on no one”.

• “I don’t depend on anything”. Well are you sure?

Now if you didn’t depend on anything. Why do you work? Why do you use power(light) in your house? Why do you wait for the mail man? Why do you sit in a chair when you aren’t aware if it can hold your weight?

• Depending is relying on something, but it is also trusting in something, which we often don’t realize. When we hear a word we never look at the other meanings that it includes also.
• Things we depend on:

Most of you believe in God. Depending can also mean trust. So you trust in God or your faith to get you through a situation.

You depend on your car to get you to work. You depend on your check, so that you may keep the roof over your head. Your kids depend on you so that they may eat tomorrow. You depend on many things in life to just live life.

• So know that “depending” is not such a bad thing, as society makes it out to be.