But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. – Matthew 6:33

According to Luke 17:21, the kingdom of God is within us.  We are the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus, according to II Corinthians 5:21.  So when we focus on our position in Christ, that we are the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus, then all these other things will be added until us.

Why?  Because we are taking our rightful position as the sons and daughters of God.

“For God has not destined us for wrath, but to obtain salvation through out Lord Jesus Christ, who died for us so that whether we are awake or asleep we might live with him.” 1 Thess 5:9-10

What a destiny, what a calling; what a course marked out that we should walk in it. Oh, the fullness of life that Jesus purchased on my behalf!

My destiny was not simply to be taken from slave to sin and enemy of the Living God into right relationship with Him; but to take me through slave to righteousness, through servant, through friend, right through to Son. What marvel: to interact with the Sovereign God. Not just a piece on the board, but a child on the lap of the Father!

I like a lot of things. And by a lot of things, I’m pretty sure there isn’t much I don’t like. With my variety of interests comes a lot of mind changing.

I’ve never really known what I want to do with my life, but I am coming a lot closer these days. I’ve narrowed it down (well, as narrow as it has ever been anyway!) to three or four main industries/jobs/etc. that I would like to work in: politics, writing (PR, journalism), entertainment and/or fashion.

I think my dream job is either working on capital hill in a communications/PR department for one of our congressmen or working communications/PR in the entertainment industry.

And I want to do it while looking and feeling fabulous. I have so many dreams for myself, it is sometimes hard to keep track of all of them, and there are obstacles in my way but I want them to all be gone by the end of 2010. And I want to be in love.

I’m a hopeless romantic.

Clearly.

xoxo.

DESPONDENCE

by: Wilbert C. Laforteza

An importunate fate stormed my dusky pathway
All in a sudden, gathered hope…all blown away!
Was badly hurt, I strove, and I struggled for life
But the untimely storm kept pressing me down, rife!

Yes, I did my best not to blunder and squander
Yet the world seems so rugged, there’s much to ponder
Impunity strafed! I’m wounded…covered with gloom
Crawled begging help from anyone, even from a hoodlum

Guts, slowly sucked by the mighty quicksand of traverse
Captured each leaf of dreams…blurred life, slowly perverse
Alas! My future’s nightmare seems unstoppable
Pesky predicament’s fruit, it’s abominable!

Cold breeze of misery whirled vastly and staggered me
But I cringed ardently like a dauntless army
Rain of tribulations spattered on everywhere
Oh! I’m hit, I’m blinded…now drifting to nowhere

Life’s strait gate, sieves the entrant who bravely aspire
Dress-up with a coat of courage, then, transpire
I can bear this boldly although hope had faded…
But with courage and zeal, I’ll rise and be lauded!

Nature’s Rage

“Abuse God, He’ll always forgive,

But abuse nature, it will never forgive”.

It’s the most abhorrent first time in the country’s history of calamity, a tropical storm brought a devastating and enormous flood dipping many places like Metro Manila, Pampanga, Cainta, et al. The nation succumbed on the flash flood happened last September 26, 2009, Saturaday. Just 9 hours of nonstop downpour was enough to equate a month-long rain (410 mm rain gauge range, which was even higher than the normal rain gauge range). Due to the incident, it must be cursed by many for the ruin it brought, tremendously.

Undeniably, tropical storm Ondoy and the flash flood it brought seem as a sample of the perfect “Destroyers and Assassins”. They are envoys of destruction and death – destroying voluminous properties, taking 300 lives, and leaving numerous individuals homeless. What must be the message of these calamities?

Although we grieve from such tragedy, it’s not an excuse for us to ignore the lessons behind it. Really, experiencing such is detestable and once again, proved that experience is a harsh teacher…it gives the test first before the lesson. I’m sure, we learned a lot from Ondoy.

Why the killer flood happened is an indication of mankind’s negligence. An end justifies the means an action employed; therefore, anything we do has its connection to the outcome. It’s safe to say that we are the cause of the killer flood. Man made the massive pollution causing the world’s threatening “global warming” which contributes to the climate change and the deterioration of the ozone layer.

Mother Earth perhaps is calling for us. Let’s get hand in hand saving the Earth from destruction. Let’s go back to the basic – plant more trees, dispose garbage properly and let’s eliminate burning too much fossil fuel that contributes to the pollution of our land, water/marine and air biodiversity.

We can’t resist from the changing climate as well the uprising calamities, but we can resist wasting lives and properties by ensuring preparedness and safety. Let’s adopt the Boy Scout’s motto: “Be Prepared”. Preparedness won’t make us futile and cry over a spilled milk. The positive side of the tragedy is that it brought us lessons that we must not be too reluctant and numb of what our surrounding needs…it’s an eye-opener for us to perform our duties towards the nature with dedication. And due to the rage, it surfaced many heroic Filipinos who helped willingly their fellows who’re in dire need to save their lives. Some heroic fellows even paid life just so save the rest…flagging the sacred sacrifice, giving their life in exchange other’s safety. The spirit of sharing, concern, help, love and care flourished… awakening everyone the virtue of “Bayanihan”.

A calamity unexpected brings a grotesque disaster but a calamity being prepared brings less ruin and grief. So, when nature’s rage strikes, behold to its possible lessons it may bring which will serve as the mirror to check out what’s lacking in our part. Wait not for another disaster, life is too short to waste on insignificant things…your belongings; your loved ones and your life can be lost in a blink of an eye when you’re hit by nature’s rage.

“All men dream; but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find it was vanity; but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act out their dreams with open eyes, to make it possible.” – T.E. Lawrence.

This is a call to action for all of you that have put off your dreams, goals, passions and aspirations because of fear, guilt, obligations, doubt, finances etc… Are you waiting for the ‘perfect’ time to wake up and dream? Start now!

What brings you alive?

• Find your passion
• Clarify your purpose
• Get inspired
• Live your dream
• Fulfill your destiny

The possibilities of what you can achieve are limitless.

If you are serious about your dreams, ready for some new ones, or want to make a change, DesigningLife can take you step by step to inspired and focused action. Give yourself this gift of transforming your dreams into reality.

Remember – the only way to predict the future, is to create it.

Call us for a complimentary 45-minute session. Are you bold enough to wake up and dream?

I am thankful for all of the people over the years who have touched my life and allowed me to touch theirs! You never know what an impact a few kind words can have on a person who is having a rough go of things, or just reminding someone that you love them.As I walk out of the house this morning I am taking along a smile to share with every person I meet and hopefully they will then share it with others.

Many thanks to the dozens of you who have sent me kind messages over the last two weeks asking where The DEW View! had gone. 

Nowhere.

I just didn’t have anything shockingly inspiring to share.

I really do want to change the world not waste your time.

ALSO… this blog is getting a massive upgrade.  I am working on some new content at danielwaldschmidt.com for you along with my friends at Channel V Media that I am SO excited to share with you.  That should be coming to you at the beginning of the year.  It’s really going to be VERY cool.  I will finally have a platform to offer you so much more content…

Everything that I am working on falls in the general category of high performance.  It’s a curious thought.  How can you consistently perform at amazingly high levels?

……….How can I do that?

………………..How can you do that?

…………………………How can you hold you employees to that standard?

These questions are on my mind these days.  Frankly, I think it’s on a lot of your minds too — if your emails and calls are an indication of what you are thinking about these days.

Being amazing, awesome, stellar — whatever you call it — really comes down to three attributes that any of us can have.  It’s not a hard formula to understand.  Is is however a painfully hard act to live…

Here is what defines “stellar”:

1. Desire — You have to want to be better.  This is where it all starts.  Without desire, you will quickly fall off the mark of consistent high performance.  It happens all time — well intentioned, passionate people giving up way too soon.  Their will is broken.  Their passion is quelled.  WHY?  They give up because they forget how bad they really want to be successful.  You need desire now more than ever.  With the gloom of global economic negativity in our face every day, desiring more for yourself is a must.
2. Dedication — You have to focus your time on being a high performer.  You can’t just simply want to be amazing and it magically happen.  You’re life isn’t a David Blaine performance, it’s a battle — for your time and attention.  Daily activity toward your goal is the only way to be a consistent high performer.  Small things add up to big things over time.  They do.  With the dedication toward accomplishing small goals, you will find yourself doing huge things over time.
3. Discipline — You have to train yourself to endure the bad stuff that happens along the way.  Despite the best plans and the most altruistic of ambitions, people and circumstances will rain all over your parade.  They will discourage you.  Many times they will deliberately try to hurt you.  You have to be ready to take a punch, get knocked out, and then stand back up and keep fighting — time after time after time.  No matter what happens, you have to have the discipline to reach deep within your soul and fight on.

Success is not usually an intellectual challenge.  It’s a mental challenge.  Desire, dedication, and discipline are not taught in the classroom.  They are a harsh reality of life.  You can be stellar.  You can find excellence.  You can be amazing…

How are you searching for stellar?

—————

By the way, if you missed the “Edgy Conversations” webinar I presented for Top Sales Expert International last week, click here to check out what 740 other people clicked on to see.  The video is about 60 minutes long and got some tremendous reviews from those who saw it live.  As a side note, there were a handful of the hundreds who saw this that thought I was a complete moron — so you know it has to be “spicy”…

And he removed from thence, and digged another well; and for that they strove not: and he called the name of it Rehoboth; and he said, For now the LORD hath made room for us, and we shall be fruitful in the land. – Genesis 26:22

The Lord has made room for us, and we shall be fruitful in the land. This is God’s promise to us. However most of us are not tapping into it.

Why? Because we don’t read the first part of the Scripture. It says they strove not.

Too many times we are not relying on God to make room for us, to bring us the opportunities, the positions, the spouse, we are strive to do it ourselves.

As long as we are doing it ourselves, God will take His hands off our lives.

Instead we need to give everything in our lives and rest on His promises instead of striving.

Oh, well imagine; as I’m pacing the pews in a church corridor,
and I can’t help but to hear, no I can’t help but to hear an exchanging of words.
“What a beautiful wedding!, What a beautiful wedding!” says a bridesmaid to a waiter.
“Oh yes, but what a shame, what a shame, the poor groom’s bride is a whore.”

I chime in with a “Haven’t you people ever heard of closing the god damn door?!”
No, it’s much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality.
I’d chime in “Haven’t you people ever heard of closing the god damn door?!”
No, it’s much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of…..

Oh, well in fact, well I’ll look at it this way, I mean technically our marriage is saved
Well this calls for, a toast so, pour the champagne,
Oh! Well in fact, well I’ll look at it this way,
I mean technically our marriage is saved
Well this calls for a toast, so pour the champagne, pour the champagne…(dun dunnnn)

I chime in with a “Haven’t you people ever heard of closing the god damn door?!”
No, it’s much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality.
I’d chime in with a “Haven’t you people ever heard of closing the god damn door?!”
No, it’s much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality…

Again……

I chime in “Haven’t you people ever heard of closing the god damn door?!”
No.
It’s much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality.
I’d chime in “Haven’t you people ever heard of closing the god damn door?!”
No, it’s much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality.

Again……

I believe that you control your destiny
That you can be what you want to be
You can also stop and say, No
I won’t do it
I won’t behave his way anymore
I’m lonely and I need people around me,
Maybe I have to change my methods of behaving
And then you do it

Leo Buscaglia Quotes

We must look for ways
To be an active force in our own lives
We must take charge of our own destinies
Design a life of substance
And truly begin to live our dreams.

Les Brown Quotes

Destiny is an absolutely definite and inexorable ruler
Physical ability and moral determination count for nothing
It is impossible to perform the simplest act when the gods say “no.”
I have no idea how they bring pressure to bear on such occasions
I only know that it is irresistible.

Aleister Crowley Quotes

Thoughts lead on to purposes
Purposes go forth in action
Actions form habits
Habits decide character
And character fixes our destiny.

Tryon Edwards Quotes

influence-
1.    the capacity or power of persons or things to be a compelling force on or produce effects on the actions, behavior, opinions, etc., of others: He used family influence to get the contract.

Influence is powerful. Used correctly, a situation can be controlled to achieve the desired outcome. In the wrong hands, it can be dangerous and hurtful. I try to discern who can influence me and who can’t, but that’s sort of logically problematic anyway. Sometimes I’m right and sometimes I’m wrong on those judgment calls.

Today was a big day for me … one of those rare days when one’s destiny hangs undecided (maybe) in the air. I thought I knew what would happen going into the day, but I was totally wrong. I found out what I needed to know, and then I let someone surprising in. I guess I felt his intentions were pure and the influence he would exert would, therefore, be inherently good. Based on his influence, I changed course and I’m feeling at peace right now.

There are many things that a relationship can teach you, too many things to be precise. Each day, each moment simply opens up your eyes to something new, a new realization, a new feeling, a newer perspective, a newer life. But then a relationship isn’t a school for life isn’t a school for we all have made same mistakes over and over again for we all have fallen in love and fallen for the same words. Had life been a school we would never have been in love for to love means to unlearn, to love means to let go and to live means to live and not to sit back and analyze and look behind every move and to speak with an intend. Life isn’t something which an academician can teach you for life lies beyond what we can see, life is everywhere, in an empty room, in an empty space for everything in life has a place, everything has it’s time for sometimes even the best of us, the most garrulous of us, the most outgoing of us, seek that reticence, seek that solitude, seek those darkened rooms and closed doors.

I don’t know a thing about anything, let alone life but the only thing that I know is to love and to love with every corner and space from within. To love and to become love, to demand and to become the demand, to fly and to become the wings, to paint the town red and to become the color, to be and to become what I am. Love is what I sought in solitude for love is where you rediscover yourself; love is my solitude where I become what I am and if love takes away your identity then let it for it’s our identities which are standing between us and love. Let me be nothing, let me be a whim, let me be the air, let me be the cloud, let me be the raindrop, one like every other, every other like one, quenching the expecting earth and becoming the earth itself. And that is why we never have loved and that is why our hearts are so full yet so empty because we are not what love wanted us to be, we are a name followed by everything that we are not, we are not love.

There are many things that a relationship can teach you but mine didn’t taught me anything for I am just a stupidly in love person for practicality is something which I always have left behind; practicality and fear for if love can’t set you free than it isn’t love. And I am vulnerable, and I am weak for there isn’t a space, the emptiness left inside of me that love didn’t uncover. And I stand uncovered, unsheathed like a neonatal now, reborn, reclaimed, rejuvenated, and waiting like this expecting earth to unite with my beloved and to become the beloved itself.

And if there is something which I did learn is about love and the way it lies in every nook and corner for love isn’t about spending your lives together rather love is about infusing your togetherness with life. And life doesn’t lie in preciseness, life isn’t about brevity for life is in details, life is in speck which we often end up missing, tossing or replacing, waiting for that big moment we end up missing everything that lies in between, forgetting that it’s these in betweens where our life exists.

Tom was getting used to the middle of the night phone calls and my time spent skrying into my black mirror and trancing out with my tarot cards.  Still, I was grateful to have a night alone.

Some journalists, although they’d never admit it, surround themselves with pictures of crime victims.  A producer I worked with, back in my TV days, once confessed that he asked a homicide victim for direction in solving her murder. “I’d say to her, Jennifer, I  know you’re out there.  I need your help.”

I prefer crystal balls and black mirrors.  I started out with a tarot reading that night.  Sometimes that gives you a lead.  I laid out a Celtic cross.  Queen of cups crossed by the 2 of swords.   Laila had two roads she could have taken. Beneath, her foundation, was was the Empress – a mother figure.  A motherless child perhaps.  Perhaps a foundation of no female role model had left her blind when it came to dangerous situations with men.  Above her was Justice – the law.  It all made sense so far.  Behind her was The Devil – addiction.  Her own?  Jared’s?  Laila was addicted to her work, certainly.  Maybe this whirlwind romance was a part of love addiction.  I sighed.

“Addiction?” I asked. “Or maybe it meant ‘watch your step,’” I smiled weakly.  I could feel her warmth.

Before her was Death.  It was clear she was transforming. How she viewed herself – ace of pentacles, fertile, full of ideas, ready to start a new life, a new home.  Family and friends, the 7 of swords – paranoia, concern.  My heart warmed up.  Their protectiveness touched her deeply. Even now. Hopes and fears – 2 of rods – good news, gifts from out of the blue.  “I hope for the same,” I whispered.  The outcome – The Judgment.  Her family awaited divine judgment.

“Okay, baby,” I said, climbing on my bed with the black mirror.

A black mirror must never be exposed to light. It’s a concave plate made of shiny, black glass and witches use it like a crystal ball.  Some witch upstate made this one.  When you stare into the mirror at just the right angle, you see clouds.  Then the clouds part and right before your very eyes, images as clear as HDTV, and sometimes even clearer, start fading in and out of the dish.

I watched the night clouds part.  A few stars dotted the sky.  And when they cleared, I saw the inside of a bar with mahogany walls and huge, old mirrors behind the bar itself.  Jared was chatting up one of the waitresses.  She seemed to be aurically pushing him away.  If only I could place the bar.  He could have been anywhere.  I tried to zoom in on the couple. They were outside now and she was handing him a ring.

* **

“Sean?”

“Jesus, Norah. It’s 11:00. I get up early to write.”

“I’m sorry. It’s important.”

“Okay, what’s up?”

“Well, I was skrying, like I’ve been.”

“Skrying. Norah, speak English and breathe.”

I laughed and tried to settle down. “It’s a wiccan and occult way of trancing out until you see things – like crystal ball gazing.  I was using a black mirror – I’ll explain it some other time.  It’s a black plate and you see things after staring into it.  Anyhow, I saw Jared in a bar and he was talking to a waitress. It was definitely a girlfriend situation. You need to find her.  Please?”

“I’ve already checked out his watering holes, babe.”

“Well, check again, Sean.  Look for a waitress or a bartender with shoulder length, wavy, dark hair.  She wears it in braids sometimes.  He proposed to her at one point, because I saw her place a ring in his palm and close his fingers around it.  They were standing outside the bar.”

“Street? Avenue? Steps? No steps?”

“I’m not sure.  It looks like maybe that bar with the harp outside on the upper west side.”

“Thanks, kiddo.  Thanks.”

I sighed.  “Better?” Sean asked.

“Much. Thanks for taking my call. Sorry. I wasn’t thinking again. Time for bed, eh?”

“Good night, Norah.”

***

It was the end of a pretty quiet night shift. For some reason, I’m always exhausted when things are slow. It’s an adrenaline thing, I guess – or just boredom.

My cell started playing, “May This Be Love,” a ringtone I’m sure everyone around me had grown sick of. It was Sean.

“Hey, Sean,” I said tiredly.

“Slow night, eh?”

“You guessed it. Whassup?”

“I’m outside that bar you saw – the one on 72nd and Amsterdam.”

“And?”

“And there’s a waitress here who fit that description, so I asked if we could talk after her shift.  You know, told her about the book and stuff. We met outside and – are you there?”

“Yeh, I’m all ears.”

“Okay, so she starts telling me how Jared was kind of a serial proposer.  She wasn’t the only one he proposed to and apparently he used the same ring over and over again,” he chuckled.

“Not one nibble?”

“Doesn’t sound like it.  She knew of one other woman, but she wouldn’t give up her name. Both of them told him he was crazy. She said he popped the question after dating her only a few weeks.”

“Goddess. Same as Laila.”

“Exactly.  I used to think he was doing it because he was in desperate financial straights, Norah, but I’m not sure anymore. He just sounds violent and nuts.”

“That’s my editor on the other line, Sean. Talk tomorrow?”

“Sure, baby.  Talk soon.  Have a good rest of the night.”

Have you ever felt like you are being pushed against a wall that you feel like screaming when someone says to you that they know you very well? Do you know anyone so well, can you swear for someone and can you assume you know someone? They try to belittle you in ways to bend you into their perception of you and you may bend to the accusations. Believe in yourself and love yourself anyway

There are times when people assume that you are someone you are not probably because they are like the same which they have accused you of or have judged you on your past misdeed. Believe in yourself and love yourself anyway

Don’t be moved by others perception of you. What’s important is what you believe; who you genuinely are, your ideals and principles and most importantly your truths about you. Not what others perceive you to be. Not their assumptions or preconceived notions of you probably judged on your appearance and your past. Believe in yourself and love yourself anyway.

There are others who wish to see you fail in life and falter simply because they can’t believe that you are who you say you are. They like to climb their ladder of success while they keep pushing you down. Believe in yourself and love yourself anyway.

They are going to assume everything inconceivably bad about you and if you love and believe in yourself, you will never be moved by it. There are those wanting to find some bad things to whisper against you, that they will make up a story about you, so convincing that it becomes believable rumors and gossip. Believe in yourself and love yourself anyway

There are those who will look for every corner to lay obstacles in your path to see you fail and beware some are done by your close friend as they may know you very well. Believe in yourself and love yourself anyway

They’ll even set you up with friends to see that you are stained, and when all fail they may create strife between you and the ones who are closest to you. Be aware of those. Reminding you again, they maybe your close friends and family. Believe in yourself and love yourself anyway

There are those who will smile with you and will stab you in the back as soon as you have turned you face/back with idle whispers to another. The two-faced ones. Believe in yourself and love yourself anyway.

There are those who hate to see you climb that ladder of success, those who would see you down and can help but won’t because you will become a better person and will be a challenge to them.

There are those who hate that you are well educated and has become a force to reckon with as you are no longer spoon fed with their garbage and has become well informed and no longer depend on them to ‘nurture your mind’ like babies. Believe in yourself and love yourself anyway.

Importantly, watch your friends who really befriend you to maliciously want to know about you, so they can talk of your confidential whispers to them. You usually know your enemies but they are sometimes in the midst and closest to your heart; the ones whom you trust with your innermost thoughts and secrets, entitled friends, but are really ‘fiends’ in disguise. Believe in yourself and love yourself anyway.

Probably something they tried for years at and never was successful at and you did it with one whiff of a breath and has become envy and jealous of you. They may overlook the fact that what they had tried was not for them but was meant for you but some tend to walk around all their lives believing that life is unfair to them, when things they wanted were not meant for them and envy you all their lives, carry around bitterness and animosity towards you all because of jealousy and envy. Believe in yourself and love yourself anyway

Instead of finding our purpose and enjoy and fulfill it. We tend to envy others and what they have; their jobs, status, finances and even their children/family to try to be like them or be better than them; poisoning selfish greed. Believe in yourself and love yourself anyway

Sometimes people are jealous of you that they would cause you to lose your job, and family with false accusations leading to strife in family and jobs. Believe in yourself and love yourself anyway

I am always happy for others and their achievements in life as long as it’s done honestly. Your accomplishments are yours, your gifts are yours, they are distinct gifts from your design. I don’t envy others, I may see something and wish for it, but I don’t envy. There are times when you must let go off those wishes which are sometimes borne out of envy, jealousy, selfishness and greed because you want to be better than someone. However, everyone can achieve success in life.

Just don’t assume that your next door neighbor’s success will be same as yours. Try and find your purpose and distinct niche. Not saying you can’t achieve success like someone else, just don’t dwell on becoming exactly like someone because you may get what you wish for and don’t know what to do with it nor able to handle it because it was not meant for you like the one you envied as all it really was simply greed.

Don’t get discouraged by someone’s perception and opinion of you. Everyone will not love you but some will and when others find lies and misconceptions about you to make you feel small, the ones created in their minds. Believe in yourself and love yourself anyway

Who cares of others opinion of you? Don’t stress nor lose a wink of a sleep on it, that’s their perception and that’s their business, not yours. Know who you are and believe who you are. Live who you are and love who you are. Only try to change the negative things you could change about yourself. Stop convincing others of who you are.

Stop living up to others expectations of you. Aren’t you tired of living up to others expectation, impression, perception and opinions of you? That’s their opinion. That’s their business, who cares?

You can’t please everyone and don’t go changing to fit someone’s personality, you are who you are and uniquely so.

Stop pretending to be who you are not, to appease their minds and please them.

Stop trying to keep up with the ‘Joneses’ on the outside while you are ‘bankrupt’ on the inside. Simply be the very utmost best you can be.

Stop hiding your face and hiding your face behind somebody. Show your entire face, be bold. Walk in/with your own shadow, not anyone’s.

Believe in yourself and love yourself anyway.

I love who I am. Every pore, way down to my core.

Written by Donique C. Perez Copyrighted 2009/11/24 All rights reserved

I am thankful for my husband Dan. We have been married over 29 years.  Although he had a busy day on his plate he still took the time to check my car because one of the lights came on yesterday. It may not seem like a big deal, but that is what love is. Caring enough to take the time to ease my mind. Many of us forget to stop and be thankful for folks that take the time to show us they care.

I came across this image
I don’t know what its from or where it originates…but i love it love it love it…(presumably from a local publication?)

I’m thinking of converting it into a tattoo…just wrapping my head around how….

beautiful. perfect.

It may seem weird, but I know God’s there for me,  no matter how many times I screw up something. He loves me, and I love Him. I know He has a plan for me, no matter what I do.  I want to show people what God has done for me and for them, He is truly amazing. I thank God for everything he has ever done because everyone wants happiness without pain, but you can’t get a rainbow without a little bit of rain. Praise the almighty.

God bless. Peace. xxx

And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die: – Genesis 3:4

The devil is the father of all lies. The devil twists the truth and distorts it, so that it looks like the truth. Adam and Eve didn’t die physically right away, but they did die. They died spiritually, and eventually they died physically.

Know that any thought that is contrary to the Word of God is the voice of satan working in your life. And whatever he tells you is a lie.

If he says, “You are going to die,” then you aren’t…at least not yet.

If he says, “You will never be healed,” then you will. According to I Peter 2:24, you already are.

Just remember: whatever he says, the opposite has to be true.

I have no job and I have no money. My life is a constant emotional rollercoaster. I don’t know what I want and I don’t know how to know… Everywhere I turn I see disaster. Everything I touch turns into dust and it’s blown away by the winds of reality. I feel like Midas – magic touch, just the opposite results, shambles instead of gold. Life is fake, so phony. We are surrounded by all these strangers who call themselves our friends. For what? Why do they bother? No one really talk to, no one to poor my soul out to. Sure, there are people, and they “check” on me to see how I’m doing, but they don’t have time to listen, really listen. So, why bother telling them anything besides “I’m fine”? They pretend to believe me, because they are too busy to stop and really listen. And if they do, they still don’t hear me, because they’re too busy giving me advice on how to live MY life. Their advice is usually good and well wished – they want to help me, but they don’t understand that ALL I need from them is to LISTEN; and just be there when I try to figure things out. That’s all what I want from them…Listen.

They say that we need to listen to our heart, because “even it’s on our left it’s always right.” Nice one, but what do you do when your heart it’s tangled? How do you get through all the emotional webs, dark and scary chambers. How do you forget and forgive? How do you move on? Spring-cleaning doesn’t do any good either… I’m so tired: of the noise, the world, the tangles… They also say that God doesn’t give us more than we can handle, I think he’s wrong in my case… And if everything happens for a reason, I lost the count and the ability to see and understand… So many unanswered questions. I sometimes see the light at the end of the tunnel, but then I get distracted and when I turn back – the light is gone…

I wish I knew what I want and how to know…

I submitted the addendum to my petition today.   My deadliest deadline for filing was on the 25th but since it will be right before the holidays, I didn’t want to gamble on it.

I know I didn’t include the certification like they asked for and it still is a source of stress.  At this point, I need a miracle, A BIG ONE. 

It will take them 14 days from the time they receive my submission to decide on my case.  It will probably be the longest two weeks of my life.  I’m going to make sure I stay busy each and every day to keep my mind off of it even though I know it will always be in the back of my head.

So this is it, huh?  Come to think of it, when the notice arrived and I thought it was the decision, I was already READY for the decision.  It’s just that this time, it’s coming right around the holidays and it could be the best Christmas present yet or… well, I don’t want to think about the alternatives. 

Right now, all the outcomes in my head are positive.  It can be no other way.  I cannot bear to think otherwise.  I will not allow myself to think otherwise.  The dice has been cast and when I finally know the outcome, that’s when I will deal with it. 

I put all my trust in the Lord.