(Synopsis of an explanation of “Nit Seva Mangun” by Jagadguru Shri Kripalu Ji Maharaj in Jagannath Puri, 2002)

A devotee is saying to his beloved Lord, “I am begging for Your eternal service.” What is the meaning of ’service’ (seva)? A soul who is under the control of Maya doesn’t understand what is service, and therefore has never done it.

Whether one serves someone in the world or one serves God and Guru, the meaning of ‘service’ is to remain favorable towards the one being served. This is the first condition. A negative thought about them should never enter your mind. In other words, you should always have favorable thinking towards your Guru and God. This is the first service to them. You should never think negatively about them, even for a moment.

We render service to our mother, father, and spouse, but we also harbour negative thoughts about them ten or twenty times a day – towards the same one we are serving! If a mother is sick and a child is serving her, the child may even think, “Oh, when is she going to die so I will be free from this!” Someone could think even up to this extent about their own parents. So one should always have a favorable attitude towards the one he is serving.

In addition to the mind, the second condition is that service is also rendered by the body. If you just remain mentally favorable then the one you are serving, he might become hungry and thirsty from lack of care. So physical activity is also required, and this is done with the body.

The third condition is that service is rendered with one’s wealth. Through this, the mind is also purified, one receives God’s grace, and the attachment and pride one had in relation to that wealth ends.

Once Queen Kunti asked for a boon from Shri Krishna: “Please make me bereft of all material wealth and possessions. If they remain, then my pride of possession will remain.” Everyone is proud of their personal possessions. A poor woman with a 100 rupee sari sees a wealthy woman wearing a 10,000 rupee sari. She feels dejected. Someone with a high school diploma is asked by someone with an MA, “What degree do you have?” “I only graduated from high school. And you?” “Oh, I have an MA”. The person with the MA feels proud.

Everyone has pride; no one in the world is saved from this. When you see someone ‘higher’ than you, your ego is deflated. “I have $10,000, but he has $100,000!” When you see someone ‘lower’ than you, you feel puffed up with pride. So you oscillate between deflated, inflated, deflated, inflated – this is how you somehow remain alive. If you kept on being puffed up with pride or were continuously deflated, you would have heart failure. Instead we see ourselves in relation to those who have more than us, and also to others who have less than us, so observing this, we remain alive.

So when there is correct mental service, physical service and financial service, this is called ‘service to God.’ At the beginning of your devotional practice, you are not able to see and know God, so God’s other form is the Guru. We do the Guru’s service. For this reason, rendering service with one’s mind, body and wealth towards the Guru is prescribed.

As long as one hasn’t attained God realisation, he should regard service to his Guru as service to God. The Bhagavad Gita says (4/34), “Go to a Guru and attain spiritual knowledge from him. Do his service and be surrendered to him.” There are three conditions stated in this verse: (1) completely surrender your mind and intellect to the Guru, (2) ask him devotional questions to remove all your doubts, and, (3) render service to him.

In this kirtan line, a devotee says, “I am only asking for divine service. I don’t want liberation or material happiness.” There is no happiness here on this earthly plane. A person is not happy here even for one day, no matter if he is prime minister, an ordinary laborer, a billionaire or a beggar – everyone is unhappy. One doesn’t receive happiness from worldly possessions or wealth. One only gets tension and anxiety. In the process of attaining wealth and possessions, one commits sins. Wealth is the cause of one’s ruin. There is no one born in the world who, after attaining wealth, doesn’t progress towards a spiritual downfall.

Even Sugreev, who after regaining his kindgom with the help of Lord Ram, forgot about Him afterward – and he was such a great devotee. What pride! So this devotee is not asking for worldy happiness or liberation from Maya, which naive people request. He is only asking for service.

In the last line of this kirtan it is written that receiving God’s divine vision and divine love isn’t the result of one’s devotional practice. The Veda explains that the vessel of the mind is dirty. It is impure due to the presence of uncountable sins. By practicing devotion to God and Guru this vessel is cleaned. Once it is fully cleaned, then whatever goes into that vessel, will be given for free. Such things are priceless; you can’t pay the price for them with anything material.

What do you possess? An impure material body and an impure material mind, plus everything in the world is material. So what could you give to God in exchange for something divine? Even so, the Guru doesn’t take anything in exchange for the power he gives you after you purify your mind. You simply have to prepare your vessel, and this will also be done by the Guru. He will make you do devotion just like a teacher teaches primary school students how to pronounce the alphabet. He will also explain to you what you want and how to get it.

So divine love or bhakti or receiving God’s vision is all accomplished through the Guru’s Grace and there is no price we could pay for that. Even if one could fully purify his mind on his own, he still wouldn’t be able to attain divine bliss or God’s divine vision. Why is this? Because our senses, mind and intellect are material and God is divine. Everything of His is divine. So after your mind is completely purified, then the Guru must give his divine power to make it divine. Afterward, you will see God’s divine form. But until your mind is purified, what will the Guru do? Into what will he give his grace? There is no proper vessel to receive it. So for making the vessel, we must practice devotion to purify the mind. This is the meaning of this kirtan verse.

A Scenic Overlook

A majestic mountain stands before you and from its upper reaches cascades a brilliant waterfall. It appears unearthly…which of course it is.

As it reaches the bottom and flows through the valley the water appears to be filled with constantly changing rays of color. It seems to be alive and pulsating with energy.

This is the River of Life…an endless stream filled with the essence of God’s love. If you stand in the middle of it you quickly realize it’s not water. It’s the visible life force that flows directly from God. It doesn’t flow around you but through you. There is a sound that is part of it and you can actually see the tone it’s making. You also hear the divine light as it fills you with its joy. You’ll feel yourself becoming as bright as the noonday sun.

You’ll return from this experience a changed person forever for you will have been baptized in the Light and Love of God.

Before anyone thinks I’m posting some cheesy erotic music.. This song is actually a translated Rumi poem expressing his ecstatic love for God and his pain in being separated from Him due to his physical form here on Earth. If you listen to it with that in mind, it takes on new, far deeper dimensions of meaning.

Vince mentioned something about a weird sense of humor. I can certainly identify with that. I can see and have seen uproariously funny things happen in every realm and dimension I’ve visited. I consider this a joy…a true gift of the spirit.

It really began to manifest in intensity after I was Baptized In The Holy Ghost years ago. That, in itself, was an experience I have never forgotten nor am I likely to. A totally unique and life changing moment.

Anyway, not long after that time I began to notice my way of looking at the world and even all of creation shifted. I was renewed. Gone was the mostly serious person I had always been. I now saw things through joy filled eyes.

Since that change I smile most of the time and I laugh a lot. Occasionally, seemingly out of nowhere, the power of the spirit will come upon me and I’ll practically collapse in fits of laughter. My wife can see it coming before I realize it’s about to happen. She says she can see it in my eyes. It can and does happen anywhere and anytime. And it’s infectious. I’ve seen a whole restaurant full of people consumed with gales of mirth and no one knew why, including the person who started it…me.

This is called by some Holy Laughter. That’s a good description since such activity can do wonders in lifting people out of the doldrums. We could all benefit from more laughter so give it a try. You might even discover your health improving.

Saturday, 5 December, 2009  (posted 7 December, 2009)

During this Holiday Season, we at the New Age Study of Humanity’s Purpose wish you Love, Abundance, and Peace. This is the time of year when we experience all kinds of emotions and situations in our lives, some are wonderful and some are challenging. To help you through these times we would like to share with you some information that has been given to Humanity by the Beings of Light. The intent of these celestial sharings is to let us know that we are not alone, and that the Company of Heaven is standing in readiness awaiting the opportunity to assist us. All we have to do is ask. Where our attention is, there we are. So let’s join together and support each other in staying focused on Love as we prepare for a wondrous Holiday Season and New Year.

No matter what the question or the problem is, the answer is always Love. Love is not just a sentimental emotion. It is an unfathomable power that, when truly acknowledged and understood, will transform our lives into expressions of love, abundance, health, happiness, abounding joy and spiritual enlightenment.

The information pouring forth from the Beings of Light in the Realms of Illumined Truth at this time is focusing on the return of the Divine Feminine, the Aspect of our Mother God that was forced to withdraw from the Earth when we closed our hearts and fell into the abyss of fear and pain after our fall from Grace aeons ago. Bringing the masculine and the feminine polarities of our Father-Mother God into balance within us, once again, is a critical step in transforming our lives.

I would like to begin this sharing with an invocation. This gift from the Company of Heaven is stated in the first person so that we will each experience it personally. Feel the Truth of these words within your Heart Flame.
 
Divine Love

Oh, Supreme Presence of God within all Life, into your Eternal Heart of Love do I immerse myself now and forever. I consciously surrender my vehicles to be merged with the Love Nature of Your Being until I AM a pure focus of Love—a living jewel in Your Crown of Adoration.

The path I walk in Life leads only to Love. My physical body filled with Love becomes shining and invincible. My etheric vehicle radiating Love transmutes the past. Love in my mind insures the expression of Your Divine Thoughts. Love in my feelings reaffirms that God is the only power acting.

As I AM thinking, feeling and remembering only Love, I know that my Father-Mother God is working through me radiating forth the perfection of All That Is to Humanity and all Life, which I have promised to Love free.

In this awakened consciousness of Divine Love, my spirit becomes Holy Spirit, and I AM the Love of God reaching out to reclaim this Earth.

In Love I magnetize all God’s blessings to me, and in Love I radiate these blessings forth to all Life around me. I AM the Spirit of Love permeating form until all is drawn back into the indivisible whole.

I feel the pulse beat of Love in all Life and the continuity of Love in all experiences I have ever known. It is ALL Love. I was born out of Love. I AM evolving through Love, and I AM Ascending back into Love.

I AM ALL LOVE, and I AM Grateful.


Lighting Our Path

Oh, Father-Mother God, I now invoke the full momentum of Your Divine Light and the Light of the entire Company of Heaven. Powers of Light! Powers of Light! Powers of Light! Come forth NOW!

In deep humility and profound gratitude, I consecrate every facet of my Being to be the Open Door that no one can shut.

In Divine Truth, I accept my reality as a Beloved Child of God.  I AM a Cup, a Holy Grail, through which the Light of God is now flowing to lift ALL Life on Earth into the blissful embrace of God’s Love.

I AM my mighty I AM Presence and…I AM One with the Divine Heart and Mind of God. I AM One with the I AM Presence of all Humanity. I AM One with the Elemental Kingdom and Mother Earth. I AM One with the Angelic Kingdom. I AM One with ALL of the Beings of Light throughout Infinity.

Now, through the unspeakable power of God’s Love, ALL life on Earth is lifted into the Immaculate Concept of the Divine Plan for Planet Earth.

Within this Divine Concept of limitless physical perfection, every man, woman and child remembers they are a Beloved Son or Daughter of God.  Every person comprehends the Divine Truth that all Life is interconnected, interrelated and interdependent.

A renewed sense of Oneness and Reverence for ALL Life stirs in each Heart Flame, and the Love of our Mother God floods the Earth through Humanity’s 5th-Dimensional Solar Heart Chakras.

As the Love of God flows through each person’s Heart Flame, they are lifted up, and their lives are transformed. From this new level of consciousness, Humanity taps into the patterns of perfection in the Causal Body of God, and viable solutions to the maladies existing on Earth flow into the conscious minds of people everywhere.

The Lightworkers come together to create the perfection of Heaven on Earth. All traces of pain and suffering are transmuted into Light. Every concept of lack and limitation ceases to exist, and the Abundance of God floods the Earth. People everywhere perceive and acknowledge the Divinity blazing in every Heart Flame. Humanity knows and accepts that all Life is Divine.

This realization inspires every person to feel and express Love and mutual respect for every part of Life. As the collective thoughts and feelings of Humanity continually empower the perfection of Heaven on Earth, the physical plane is transformed and transfigured. The body of Mother Earth is restored to a verdant Paradise of Splendor and Light.

The life of every living Being is filled with Love, Joy, Happiness, Prosperity, Fulfillment, Enlightenment, Eternal Peace, Harmony, Balance, Spiritual Wisdom and every other Divine Quality of our Father-Mother God.

Mother Earth dons her seamless garment of Light and Ascends up the Spiral of Evolution into the full expression of her new 5th-Dimensional Solar Reality. The Heavens rejoice, and our Father-Mother God respond

“Welcome HOME, Beloved Children. Well done.”
And so it is.  I AM, I AM, I AM.

With the return of our Mother God, the Divine Masculine and Feminine are balanced within every Heart Flame. Humanity must now realign with the Truth and Inner Knowing of what the Love of our Mother God really means in relation to our very existence.  

So much has been written about Love that is has almost become a platitude, but the Transfiguring Divine Love of our Mother God, is the mightiest force in the Universe. It is the vibration from which we were born out of the Heart of God and the vibration through which we must evolve and Ascend back into the Heart of God. The Love of our Mother God has no bonds, no barriers, and no conditions. Within the infinite power of our Mother’s Love there is no pain or sorrow, no lack or limitation. Her Love contains within its essence the full potential to rise above all human conditions, all self-inflicted suffering, all manner of chaos, confusion, hopelessness and despair.

Our Mother God’s Love heals the illusion of separation. It rejuvenates, revitalizes and makes whole all it embraces. It is the single greatest source of forgiveness, and it reverberates with the full gathered momentum of our Eternal Freedom. Her Love is the foundation of Creation and the balance of the One. It is the indivisible, unchanging ecstasy that allows us to know Love in all things. When we experience the Love of our Mother God, we understand that we are all One. Whether we are a person, a magnificent Sun or a blade of grass, the all-encompassing Light of our Mother’s Love unites us in the Body of God.

As our Mother God reclaims this Earth and once again anoints Humanity with the Eternal Light of Divine Love, we experience true Peace. Her Love is now resonating in the core of our Beings; it is not outside of us. We no longer need to seek the Divine Feminine from afar; we need to merely accept that our Mother God has returned, and that she is now abiding within our Heart Flames. Her Love is pulsating within the silent rhythm of every heartbeat, every breath. It is the universal language now speaking to all Humanity through our gift of Life. As we listen in the silence of our hearts, we hear the tones and whisperings of Love inspired by the wonder of nature and the Music of the Spheres.

Our Mother God is now reestablishing her Covenant of Love with the Children of Earth, which will enhance our ability to once and for all accept the gift of God’s Abundance. Through this covenant, the supply of all good things will forever and ever flood into the hands and use of the Sons and Daughters of God. The glory of God’s Abundance will be a manifest reality not only in this moment, but far beyond Earth and time into Eternity.

The effulgence of our newly balanced Heart Flames is creating an environment of Love and upliftment around each of us. When we turn our attention to the balanced expression of our Father-Mother God within our hearts, the illusion of separation is shattered. Our hearts are unified, and we once again experience the bliss of knowing we are One, and that Love is all there is. This knowing evokes from within the deepest recesses of our Beings a celestial song of thanksgiving and a reverent feeling of Divine Gratitude. Every sunrise we see, every flower that shares its perfume with us, every friend and loved one who warms our heart is a gift of God’s sustaining Love. These sacred gifts inspire our perpetual adoration to the Cosmic I AM, All That Is.

Our Mother God has placed us within a mantle of Her Love, and our nervous systems are being recalibrated to withstand the highest frequencies of the Divine Feminine. This mantel of Love will help to transform each of us into conscious, self-generating centers of Light and Love. The tremendous impetus and magnetic pull of our Mother’s Love now flowing through our Heart Flames will stir the souls of Humanity. The invisible and resistless power of this Love will pierce into the sleeping spiritual centers of every member of the Human race and accelerate the awakening of each one.

We now, as never before, have the ability to merge our personal service to Life with God’s service to Life for the highest good of all concerned. Our Mother God’s radiant, universal Love is pouring through all of us without designating favor to a particular person, place, condition or thing. Her Love is giving a healing, impersonal benediction to every particle of Life. The power and magnetic Love of the Divine Feminine is blessing all Life with an equal opportunity to respond. Every evolving soul is being given both the blessing and the responsibility of becoming an Open Door for our Mother God’s exquisite Love. Every Human Being now has the opportunity to become an instrument of God vested with the power to change the feelings of all with whom we come in contact. This will be accomplished not through our human will, but through the balanced power of the Flame of Divinity now blazing in our hearts.

When we agree to become a magnetic force of Divine Love, we draw to ourselves the loving support we need from those who are aligned with, and will assist us with, our Divine Missions. This occurs not because of allegiance to a particular personality, but because of the affinity of our soul’s Light with the spiritual essence of the particular facet of the Divine Plan.

As we expand our service to Life, we must reach up in consciousness and tap into the sacred knowledge and wisdom that will teach us how to effectively utilize the frequencies of Divine Love from our Mother God. Her Love is a priceless gift that is now freely flowing through every Heart Flame. The more we understand about the power and might of this majestic force, the more effective we will be in assimilating it into our life experiences.

In order to be a powerful force of Divine Love on this planet, all you have to do is open your heart and remember that this is your destiny. It is who you are, right here and right now.
And so it is.

©2006 Patricia Diane Cota-Robles – www.eraofpeace.org

Why is solitude so important? What’s so great about it? Is it really necessary? The answers to all three of these questions are wrapped up in one word.

GOD.

Connecting with God is of primary importance. That’s why I’m on this path. To be sure I can experience God while I’m in a group of people. It happens in Church. He also manifests His presence at the grocery store and even when I’m eating breakfast in a casino.  God can and often does show up in some rather surprising places.

Ah, but when I am alone and all is quiet. that’s when I really connect with the Father in a close and personal way. That’s when I feel His never ending love. No matter what I’ve done or how badly I’ve failed God loves me. In the silence I hear Him talk to me. Often I feel His presence so strongly I can hardly stand. During those beautiful moments, I concentrate on opening up completely to His will.

And this is but a slight glimpse at why I embrace solitude.

Somewhere you are lost in oblivion,
racing through uncertain dreams
in search of Ishq-e-Majazi – the Love of Layla and Majnun
and of Ishq-e-Haqiqi – the Love of eternal Divine

It is here, dear one,
in this magnificent palace of unspeakable wonder,
singing the praises of beloved Mumtaz
and glowing with the miracles of the Qur’an;
the Love of Creation and Creator forever married
and sparkling in blissful union.

Come, you are wounded by Love;
Like a freedom fighter, you stood with open arms
before an army of war tanks and planes from above.
You let them blast their shells into your frail body
and then watched their arsenal self-destruct
as you burst into a million rose petals lit with fiery flames

Let celestial winds carry your burning desire to this domed jewel,
Let your tears bathe in the pool and witness transformation
Let your blood tell the garden its tale of massacre and sacrifice
Let it sprout like a fountain and fill the rivers with longing
Let your ashes kiss this soil and bloom into revolutionary resurrection

Lift the veil and step into the invisible world
Where dervishes dance in the courtyard,
Where sweet music plays for every created soul,
and where Angels tell you:
outside of this was the real dream-world

Yes, come closer
This mausoleum of Love is alive,
the beauty is deeper,
and the ghost of the architect is speaking:

I am Shah Jahan
Let my insanity be on the tongue
of every Romantic that comes after me
and let them say:
I will build kingdoms in my soul
finer than this wondrous palace,
and I will paint holy verses in my heart
more beautiful than any calligrapher can brush
Such is the pledge of my madness

O’ seekers of Truth!
Enough lies and falseness
plague the people of our world;
Do not even speak to your Beloved
If your Love is not True like this

~ Jehanzeb

Hamare man, base yugal sarkar.
Shri Radha Krishna, the eternal Divine Couple, reside in my heart!

Gaur varani Vrishbhanu-nandini,
neel varan rijhavar.
Vrishabhanunandini (Shri Radha) is fair-complexioned and Nandakumara Shri Krishna is blue-complexioned.

Garabahin deene dou thadhe,
manju nikunja majhar.
Shri Krishna and Shri Radha are standing in the a beautiful flowering grove with Their arms around each others shoulders.

Ut pahirey neelambar sohati,
it peetambar dhar.
Shri Radha is clad in blue, and Shri Krishna, in yellow.

Ut sorah singar sajin it,
natvar bhesh sanvar.
Shri Radha is decorated from head to toe with sixteen types of adornments, and Shri Krishna is dressed very simply in a country-style.

Ut singar madhya chhavi sohati, it chhavi madhi shringar.
On one side is Beauty (Shri Krishna) in the heart of Adornment (Shri Radha); and on the other side is Adornment (Shri Radha) in the heart of Beauty (Shri Krishna).

Badbhagi ‘Kripalu’ jin chhin chhin, jori yugal nihar.
Jagadguru Shri Kripalu Ji says, “They, indeed, are the most fortunate who are eternally blessed with the rarest vision of the Divine Couple.”

(Pad kirtan excerpted from the Yugal Madhuri section of “Prem Ras Madira”, written and composed by Jagadguru Shri Kripalu Ji Maharaj)

© Jagadguru Kripalu Parishat and Bhakti Bliss, 2009

No matter how much we were in love with each other, there will come a time when we think to ourselves: “I love my husband or spouse, but I don’t feel in love.” In fact many people come to a place where they may even say, “I don’t think I love my spouse anymore.”

The reason is quite simple.

Most of us get married to be loved, not to learn how to love. I know you are probably reacting to that statement. I was convinced I was the best person in the whole world to love my wife. God had given her to me and I was the one who could love her best. I soon discovered there were some things my wife did that I did not know how to love. I soon discovered that my love was selfish. Along with my attempts to love her came my disappointment when she did not love me the way I expected. I discovered my love was rooted in selfishness.

Our reasons for marriage usually have some flavor of selfishness, usually because we believe we will be better off, they will provide for me, they will give me what I need.

Any marriage that begins with some semblance of selfishness (don’t they all?) will be in for some kind of adjustment. At some point your spouse will fail to do something which we expected or counted on. At some point we will encounter disappointment and even hurt because something we counted on did not get done.

Marriage confronts our biggest sin – Pride.

We all bring pride into our marriage, and because of our pride, we have expectations and those expectations will be disappointed, because our spouse also has pride and selfishness.

Melittledina posted this on askmehelpdesk forum, where you can ask experts anything:

I’ve been with my spouse for now 5 1/2 years. We have two girls. Oldest is 4 years old and the youngest is 2 years old. I am UNHAPPY in my relationship. The first year we where together, when I was pregnant with are first, I discovered that he was sending pornographic photos of himself and his ex-girl-friend on the internet “Live sex chat”. I forgave him. After, I discovered that he stole money that we had for the rent and lied to me about it until I caught him red handed. I forgave him. After, I discovered that he stole his best friend’s credit card. I forgive him. After I discovered that he stole money from his boss at work and he lost his job. I forgive him. Last October, I got a phone call from another woman. HE CHEATED on me! I left him. After 1 week, he tried to kill himself, so AGAIN I forgive him. I am so tired!!! I think today that I am with him only for my children… He is a good father to them. But I can’t live like this anymore. I’ve been thinking of cheating on him to get revenge but that won’t work. I just want him out of my life…

The experts told ‘melittledina’ she needs to divorce her no-good husband for the protection of the children. Obviously Christ was not in their family. Even if ‘Melittledina’ had been a Christian, she probably would have divorced her husband. She had discovered that he had serious character flaws. He was not meeting her expectations. She still loved him, but she was no longer in love…she wanted out of the marriage. She had married for love, but she did not marry to learn how to love such a seriously flawed man.

Most of us enter marriage with dreams and expectations. At one time we were active in our love for our spouse. Then, like ‘melittledina’, we start to see character flaws, some very serious. Then, disappointment, hurt, and bitterness build up stumblingblocks to our love.

What happened to my “Soul-Mate”

The truth is that we have this concept of “soul-mate” floating around our sub-conscious. Plato taught this before Christ was born, that somehow our souls were torn in two and there is someone out there with the other half of our soul. We get married because we think we have found our “soul-mate” and it is just so easy being around them. We have fun, we laugh, there is nothing forced about our relationship. We genuinely believe we have found the one God meant us to be married to the rest of our lives.

Love is largely a feeling that produces long conversations, walks in the park, long slow kisses, and gentle touches. Our feelings are magnified to the ‘nth’ degree. We are constantly floating on clouds.

Then we get married and life happens. Life is not easy, it is very difficult. The clouds evaporate, the long slow kisses become short little pecks, the walks in the park become falling asleep on the couch.

After months or years, as our disappointment grows and the trials increase, we find ourselves wondering about our “love” and where it went. You tell your friends that you still love your spouse, but the love has changed. The feelings are not there. You wonder about this “soul-mate” thing, especially when days go by without intimacy or involved conversation.

“Bride to Be” becomes the “Bride that Was”

Do you know the difference between the bride to be and the bride that was?

It’s not the veil, or the dress. It’s your attitude! A bride to be will not hesitate to tell you all the wonderful things her husband to be is. She can go on for 5 or 10 minutes about “he does this” and “he does that”.

When you ask that same bride about her husband 5 or 6 years later, she will generally say, well, he doesn’t do this anymore, he doesn’t do that anymore…At some point your marriage will go from “what my spouse is…” to what “my spouse isn’t…”

When we get to the point in our marriage where we define our spouse by their “faults” we find ourselves in that “struggle” phase of our relationship and we catch ourselves thinking, “I love my spouse but I am no longer in love.”

In fact, we discover we have “fallen out of love” and may have thoughts of moving on. It is a difficult situation when husbands and wives no longer feel they are in love with their partners, or no longer feel that lovely intimate connection they once enjoyed. It is at this point we are susceptible to outside influences that promise more excitement than we have at home.

This situation and thinking can lead to affairs: emotional, cyber, or physical intimate relationships outside of the marriage. This is one of the most harmful and damaging of all behaviors in a marriage, potentially ending the relationship and destroying a family.

What do we do? We embrace these three ideas and bring them into our marriage:

1. Marriage is a Love Laboratory, Not a Love Spa.
2. Marriage is a Loving Relationship, Not a Love Relationship.
3. Marriage is a Dependant Relationship, Not an Independent Relationship.

Marriage is not designed to be a series of Spa Days. You just can’t lay there while your spouse massages you 24 hours a day. In fact, most folks that have been married any length of time will tell you that marriage takes work. Now I’d like to challenge that idea just a bit. Most of us don’t associate “work” with fun and excitement. Most of us “work” to survive. While we certainly have to invest our energy, time, and effort into creating a healthy marriage and while creating a healthy marriage is not easy or simple, I believe it is better to see marriage as an open laboratory that requires our energy and effort to produce a beautiful and fulfilling and loving union.

1. Marriage Requires a Laboratory of love

• This laboratory is constantly finding what the marriage needs for proper nourishment through the various stages of life. Summer, winter, Fall, Spring.
• This laboratory is constantly finding how much energy the marriage requires at the various stages
• This laboratory requires 24/7 commitment, because the marriage is a delicate creature.
• This laboratory is a busy place, because the effort to keep the marriage flourishing requires persistence and endurance, as one who runs a marathon.
• This laboratory requires dedication, because the studying of marriage is a constant and on-going process.
• This laboratory requires creativity, because the marriage is constantly transforming into a different form requiring creative care and adjustments.
• Each day there are new variables that require our constant attention to this relationship. You can’t let your guard down, this is a 24/7 situation.

Marriage requires a Laboratory that provides nourishment, effort, energy, creativity, commitment… and most of all love.

2. Marriage requires a Loving Relationship.

There is a huge difference between love and loving.

We often, and in the above situation use the word, “love” to describe a general feeling of care or sisterly/brotherly love. “Love” could be used to describe ones feeling for the neighbor down the street or a stranger across the planet. It is a nice word that denotes concern and perhaps even a degree of empathy. In the past this form of love was called “philos” meaning deep friendship.

When a person says they love their partner but are not in love, these feelings are often that to which they refer. Loving, on the other hand is completely different. It is a powerful verb meaning you are doing something. You are acting. You are involved and active. It is a participatory word. Take a minute and ponder what it means for you to be loving. What sorts of actions do you do when you are loving another? Perhaps you are engaging in sexual intimacy? Maybe giving gifts? Maybe being kind and considerate? Maybe you are complimentary or demonstrating love in some way?

Now, here is the REALITY of “love” in marriage:

If you are not “in love” with your partner it is because YOU are not loving him or her.

• When a man says, “I love my wife but I no longer am in love with her,” it means, “my wife is a good person but I am not LOVING her”
• When a woman says, “my husband is a nice man but I am no longer in love with him”; it means “I care about my husband but I am not LOVING him”.

In other words, to truly be “in love” requires you to be actively loving your spouse! If you are not loving, you will not be “in love”.

This is a simple idea yet can have extraordinary impact on a relationship. Too often people have the mistaken notion that being “in love” just happens. This is just not so. Remaining in love with someone requires you to be loving. It requires you to engage in the relationship in loving ways. You must demonstrate and bring love to the relationship.

The more you are loving the stronger the bonds of love.

It was Jonathan Swift, the satirical author of the famous book that many of you will know from childhood, “Gulliver’s Travels”, it was he who said these words: ‘We have just enough religion to make us hate one another, but not enough religion to cause us to love one another’.

HOW DO WE TAKE A STALE MARRIAGE AND TURN IT INTO A DYNAMO OF PASSION AND LOVE?

3. We Need a DEPENDENT Relationship

I’m not talking about being dependent upon each other. Most of us are in one way or another, and that only leads to a marriage of give and take. We are all dependent upon the government, some more than others, and I don’t think that leads to a “Loving Relationship”.

What kind of dependency am I talking about? Only by depending upon God can we truly become empowered to Love our spouse as He Loves. I think we will realize this when we look at the greatest picture of “Loving” ever written by man. And it was written by someone who never married. The first three verses I have “jimized”…

1 Corinthians 13:1-3 (JMZD)

If I sing “I Love You’s” with the voice of an angel and yet do not possess God’s love for my spouse, I am just an irritating hanger clanging on the closet door.

If I can capture the eyes of my spouse with mine, and know their deepest heart’s desires, and shower them with mountains of wealth and luxury, but possess not God’s love in my heart, I am just a vanishing vapor.

If I give everything I have to my spouse and even sacrifice my life for them, and yet I possess not the very Love of God, I have accomplished nothing.

Without Agape Love Your Marriage is Nothing

The emphasis on 1 Corinthians 13 is not Love, although that certainly is the subject. The emphasis is from the phrase in verse 2 and somewhat in verse three:

ἀγάπην δὲ μὴ ἔχω (agapēn de may echo) (But Divine Love I Do Not Have) (I do not hold or possess) οὐθέν εἰμι. (outhen eimi) I am nothing

If you do not possess God’s Divine agape love in your heart toward your wife, YOUR MARRIAGE IS NOTHING!

Do You want a Nothing Marriage? Do you want to lie in a grave next to your wife and over you there is a headstone that reads “Our Marriage was Nothing!”

No! I want to say to the world Our Marriage was Something, because God was present in our marriage. We were actively Loving Him and as a result we were actively loving each other!

Paul’s Great Discourse on the Power of LOVING…

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (ESV) Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away.

Here is 1 Cor 13:4-8 in a positively translated MARRIAGE PLEDGE:

A Marriage Pledge of Active Loving

• suffereth long: I will always react to hurt with a slow boil,
• is kind:  I will always be reaching out in kindness and showing favors,
• envieth  not:  I will always share and rejoice in the experiences of my spouse,
• vaunteth  not itself:  I will always seek to honor and give to my spouse,
• is  not puffed up: I will always relate with humility and modesty,
• Doth not behave itself unseemly: I will always be orderly and controlled and comely (attractive),
• seeketh not her own: I will always seek to serve my spouse without expectations
• is not  easily provoked: I will always be emotionally involved with my spouse without being overly “touchy”,
• thinketh no evil: I will always think good or my spouse and will vaporize any hurts and unkindness
• Rejoiceth not in iniquity: I will never think or speak of the wrongs of my spouse, especially to others,
• but rejoiceth in the truth: I will courageously embrace truthfulness and honesty with my spouse,
• Beareth all things: I will always bear my spouses irritations and failures and will always cover them with God’s forgiving love,
• believeth all things: I will always believe the best of my spouse
• hopeth all things: I will never cease to hope for God’s best in our marriage,
• endureth all things: I will actively stand against any attacks or failings that threaten our love,
• Charity never faileth: I will actively love my spouse forever!

If you desire a Sacred Marriage, to be TOTALLYMARRIED according to God’s Design, you must realize, you must fully embrace that Marriage is to be an ACTION VERB, not just a state of mind. It is to be not a LOVE RELATIONSHIP, but a LOVING RELATIONSHIP! Most importantly, you must realize that no man or woman can love their spouse with the ‘AGAPE’ love described in Romans 13. We must be dependent upon God for this LOVE. And if we possess God’s AGAPE Love in our heart, we will see that it is a dynamic force for LOVING our spouse. The Bible makes this abundantly clear:

The Bible Puts the LOVING in LOVE!

1. Put on love Colossians 3:14 (ESV)

• And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.

2. Follow after love 1 Corinthians 14:1 (ESV)

• Pursue love, and earnestly desire the spiritual gifts, especially that you may prophesy.

3. Abound in love Philippians 1:9 (ESV)

• And it is my prayer that your love may abound more and more, with knowledge and all discernment,

4. Continue in love Hebrews 13:1 (NLT)

• Keep on loving each other as brothers and sisters. Keep on keeping on…

5. Increase in love 1 Thessalonians 3:12 (ESV)

• and may the Lord make you increase and abound in love for one another and for all, as we do for you,

6. Be fervent in love 1 Peter 4:8 (NKJV)

• And above all things have fervent love for one another, for “love will cover a multitude of sins.”

7. Spur each other to love Hebrews 10:24 (ESV)

• And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works

1 Corinthians 16:14 (NIV) Do everything in love.

How to Turn a Nothing Marriage into Something

Marriage is an Impossible Union without the Agape Love of Jesus Christ Loving through you. The sooner you surrender your heart to allow God to Love through you, the Sooner you can become TotallyMarried according to God’s Design.

Let’s see how we can possess God’s AGAPE love. Let’s see how God can take a nothing and make him a something. God does the same for our marriages, making them dynamo’s of His Love.

1 Corinthians 1:26-31 (KJV) For ye see your calling, brethren, how that not many wise men after the flesh, not many mighty, not many noble, are called: But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty; And base things of the world, and things which are despised, hath God chosen, yea, and things which are not, to bring to nought things that are: That no flesh should glory in his presence. But of him are ye in Christ Jesus, who of God is made unto us wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and redemption and _____________: That, according as it is written, He that glorieth, let him glory in the Lord.

Of God are we IN CHRIST JESUS, who of God is made unto us whatever we need – love for our spouse…

We must come to the place where we realize we cannot love our spouse the way God loves them. We must see ourselves as nothing before God. He wants no pride in our lives. He wants only His strength and His love in our lives. So we go through the Cross in our marriage, realizing that we do not have His love, that we are nothing, and then we say, “Christ lives in me!, All that He has is mine. Christ is AGAPE Love! Let me be a channel of His AGAPE Love! Once we kneel before Him as nothing, through Jesus Christ, God makes us SOMETHING! He fills us with the most powerful Love in the universe – HIS LOVE!

God’s love must be allowed to energize you. YOU hold the key to how much you love and how much you are in love with your partner. YOU have it in your mind and heart to act lovingly or not. YOU have it in your power to be loving.But you must be willing to allow God to channel His love through you, to love even the ugliness in your spouse that you have been unable to.

Love is not something that just happens. And remaining in love with your partner most definitely will not happen unless you give everything you have to God and then allow Him to change your heart. You must become “loving’ toward your spouse.

Notice how it may feel to tell your spouse, “I am loving you,” rather than, “I love you.” The first describes something you are doing, not just something that may be a feeling similar to how you feel about your childhood friend of long ago. To help you see what it means to be ‘loving’ I recommend you have this ‘Loving Kit’ handy at all times.

The Loving Kit for Sacred Marriages

• Toothpick: Matthew 7:1 Always pick out the good qualities in your spouse
• Rubber Band: Romans 8:28 Be flexible, things do not always go the way you want.
• Band-Aid: Colossians 3:12-14 Take time to offer a healing hand, one full of love & grace.
• Pencil: Ephesians 1:3 Write down a blessing because of your spouse; add to your list of blessings daily.
• Eraser: Romans 3:23 Erase the mistakes your spouse makes as they happen.
• Mint: Proverbs 11:25 Do something to refresh your spouse as you enjoy this mint.
• Hugs & Kisses: 1 Peter 5:14 Don’t let the sun go down without giving your spouse at least one kiss & hug.
• Teabag: 1 Thessalonians 5:18 Stop, relax, and thank God for your spouse. Then thank them. Thankfulness goes a long way.

In order to Possess the Love of God in your heart, you probably need to do some HEART cleaning first.

Prepare Your Heart to Be Loving

If there is any resentment, any hatred, any hurt, any bitterness, any wrong relationships, any regrets, anything you are not thankful for, any wrong doing you are holding onto. You can’t have the Love of God because He doesn’t have all of your heart. You are blocking Him from some area of your life. If your spouse has wronged you and you haven’t forgiven them, you are blocking that area of your heart from God’s love. You will not hold the love of God in your heart!

Here’s what you need to do right now: Give your entire heart to God-all the pieces-all the rooms. Hold nothing back. Give your spouse to God; give all those expectations, that honey do list that never gets done. Give it all and say God, fill me with your love and allow that love to overflow toward my spouse.

If you want to rediscover those lost feelings for your spouse start by changing the way you view him. Falling into a trap where you only see the negatives in your husband is very easy to do. Make a concerted effort to only focus on the positive parts of him. Be vocal about how much you appreciate those things about him. Tell him and tell others. The more you verbalize what you find appealing about him, the more you’ll start to recognize and appreciate it.

Start doing small things for your spouse again. Quite often when a wife (or husband) starts to fall out of love with her husband she also begins to neglect him. If you did certain things early in the marriage, such as making his lunch, cooking his favorite dinner or washing his clothes, do that again. Once you start taking the time to do things for him you’ll likely see a change in him too. He’ll also want to do more for you which will help you to recognize those qualities in him that first attracted you to him.

The Loving Dare:

On two pieces of paper write the three questions below. Each partner gets one sheet of paper.

Both you and your partner answer the questions then guess how your partner will answer them. (Four answers each). Share your thoughts! Discuss your answers! Then throw it away (or give them to God. Remember, Agape Loving is not about you and your expectations, it is about being a channel of GOD’S LOVE. So while it helps to see your spouses wants and needs and be willing to meet them, you must do the thirds step in our Loving Dare, you must daily ask God to love your spouse through you in a way they have never been loved before.

The three questions:

1. What can I do to make our marriage better?
2. What would my spouse like me to do to keep our marriage alive and vibrant?
3. God, will you love my spouse through me as they’ve never been loved before?

The Ring of Death Silenced by Love

In seventeenth-century England during the time of General Cromwell, a soldier was condemned to die by execution at the ringing of the curfew bell. This soldier, however, was engaged to be married to a beautiful young girl. With tears, the girl pleaded with the judge and with Cromwell to spare his young life. But it was all in vain. The preparations were made for the execution, and the city awaited the signal from the bell at curfew. The sexton, who was old and deaf, threw himself against the rope, as he had for years. He pulled it and pulled it and pulled it, not realizing that no sound was coming from the bell. The girl had climbed to the top of the belfry, and had reached out, caught, and held on to the tongue of the huge bell at the risk of her life. As the sexton rang it, she was smashed against the sides of the bell…but the bell was silent. At length, the bell ceased to swing, and she managed to descend from the tower, wounded and bleeding. Cromwell, waiting at the place of execution, wanted to know why the bell had not rung. The girl arrived and told him what she had done. A poet recorded it for all time. This is what he said:

At his feet she told her story,
Showed her hands all bruised and torn;
And her sweet young face, still haggard
With the anguish it had worn;
Touched his heart with sudden pity,
Lit his eyes with misty light:
“Go, your lover lives,” said Cromwell,
“Curfew will not ring tonight.”

To what lengths are you prepared to go to silence the clanging, the arguing, the discord in your marriage.

To what lengths are you willing to go to change wrong and disrespectful attitudes built up over the years.

To what lengths are you willing to go to be Loving toward your spouse.

Are you willing to give your heart to God and be used by Him to be a channel of His love toward your spouse. Are you willing to let Gid use you to be actively loving toward His Son or daughter?

God has always been actively Loving you through His Son

Because of Jesus willing to go to the Cross, God threw a mantle over your sins, over every hurt and pain you caused Him, and He took the punishment for your sins, and not only that, he sympathised with our sinful flesh, and through the Power of the Cross offers us a way to be transformed from selfish sinners into Loving Saints. Sin, Satan and death have all been defeated through the cross, and you can share in that when you live your life by the Power of the Loving Cross.

That’s what God did for us. He didn’t just send a note to us saying He loved us. He didn’t just give us a loving kit. He sent His son to visibly express his Loving Heart & Ways!

Powerpoint

Sermon Video

“He that rejects me, and receives not my words, has one that judges him:

 the word [vibrations surrounding us/paramchaitanya]

that I have spoken, the same shall judge him in the last  day

For I have not spoken of myself; but the Father who sent me,

 He gave me a commandment, what I should say,

 and what I should speak.

And I know that His commandment is life everlasting:

 whatsoever I speak therefore, even as the Father says to me, so I speak.”

Cf. John 12:48-50

Learn more on:  http://www.sahajayogavideo.com/heart-and-throat-centres.html

…but who you are.  I worked for over four decades assisting people to improve their relationships with themselves, God, other people and our planet and all its creatures and plants. It has been both rewarding and very frustrating work.  A lot of the New Age teaching revolves around manifesting what we want. Keeping our minds positive, focusing.  And, that’s great stuff.  However, I have learned through my healing practice mind control is not enough. You also need emotion control.  Well, not really “control” but understanding and clearing.  We respond the way we do because a part of us has not been loved and traumas have filled the space.   Sounds too simple doesn’t it? But, really, as Earnest Holmes said, ‘Nothing to heal, only God to reveal.”  Love is God. So, in the healing work I hold divine loving presence right where the trauma lives.  Right in the cells, atoms, and DNA where the memory of the incident rests awaiting a smell, a sound, or a look to activate it.  What is more powerful than God? Nothing.  Nothing.  All beings great and small come from the same Divine Seed.  So, if Divine Love has created you, then divine Love can heal you. Makes sense, doesn’t it.  So, in the presence, if the client is willing, the trauma melts away.  The spaces in your cells and atoms that are love, means the more of you is love. Nice isn’t it.

So, who you are becomes love.  And love is the greatest manifestor of all. As it is the creator of all.  Love, Deborah-Marie     www.deborahmdiamond.com

Angel Message for Today

The message for today comes from the Angel of Divine Love and Protection, Elandra. “Guardian Angels watch over you while you are asleep and help to keep you safe and well. There is nothing to fear! I am the Divine Mother, I oversee the birthing process and pour out the highesr vibration of Unconditional Love and comfort to all. Call upon Me when you feel fearful or powerless and I will hold you in my arms as a mother holds and loves her child, as you are all my children. You can find solace in my presence”.

Elandra looks after the soul’s birthing into all dimensions. She protects and guides these beings in their new lives. She helps them to fulfill their destiny in their new incarnations, and offers guidance and understanding to the new parents and the newly birthed soul. She offers comfort or those who are lonely, ill, or afraid; and reaches out to those who are elderly and confused and feel that all hope is gone. She also protects and comforts children who are restless at night or afraid of the dark. Affordable signed copies of this energy painting are available here
or larger sizes can be ordered here.

Click Here for another Inspirational Message from the Angels.

Copyright Glenyss Bourne 2009

Hamaro Shri Vrindaban chanda.
Shri Krishna alone is our everything.

Sadghan, chidghan, anandaghan joi, banyo soi Nandananda.
He who is called by the Vedas sat-chit-anand(existence, knowledge and bliss), has descended as the son of Nanda in Braj.

Paramatma ki param atma,
Radha kaha shruti chhanda.
The soul of that same supreme God, who is also inseparable from Him, has been called ‘Radha’ by the Vedas.

Yugal ekaras ras barasavat,
saras raas ananda.
Both Radha and Krishna bless the deserving souls by showering on them the sweetest divine love bliss of the pastime of raas.

Vrindaban nidhivan gahavaravan, viharat Anandakanda.
Shri Krishna eternally engages in ever-new leelas of divine love, sometimes in Vrindaban, sometimes in Nidhivan, and sometimes in Gahavaravan.

Phirat ‘Kripalu’ Shambhu se jinake, pare prem ke phanda.
Jagadguru Shri Kripalu Ji Maharaj says that even great personalities like Lord Shiva wander in the lanes of Braj, bound by the rope of Shri Krishna’s love.

(Pad kirtan excerpted from “Shri Krishna Madhuri” of Prem Ras Madira, written and composed by Jagadguru Shri Kripalu Ji Maharaj)

© Jagadguru Kripalu Parishat and Bhakti Bliss, 2009

Chandra sam barhai prem Govinda Radhey.
Pai yamen poornima na kabahun bata dey.

(New kirtan verse written by Jagadguru Shri Kripalu Ji Maharaj on November 2, 2009, Bhakti Dham, Mangarh)

The definition of love is that it should always keep on increasing every moment. The place where the flow of the Ganges River begins in the Himalayas is shaped like the mouth of a cow, so it is called “Gomukh”. It is very narrow at this point, but after this, its flow steadily increases. By the time it reaches Bengal it is extremely big and wide. Divine love is like this.

How is worldly love? It is like a river that begins with a width of fifty feet. So many small rivulets branch off from this river that eventually it becomes a small stream. Understand this in simple language.

If you stand outside in the very early morning, your shadow is extremely long. This becomes shorter and shorter as the sun moves, until midday when you have no shadow at all. As the day progresses towards later afternoon, again your shadow grows again in the opposite direction. So worldly love is just like your shadow when it starts out long in the morning and ends at midday. This is true of any kind of love you have in the world, whether of your wife, husband, son, daughter, or even of a beautiful scene.

For example, the Taj Mahal is one of India’s most beautiful landmarks. When foreign prime ministers visit India, they visit the Taj Mahaj and praise it greatly. But if you ask the people who live in Agra (where the Taj Mahal is located), “Come on! Let’s go see the Taj Mahal!” They will say, “What for? What is there to see? I saw it already.”

So all love in the world steadily decreases. And after this, one starts to experience sorrow from that same husband or wife. Then the insults and verbal abuse begin. God’s love on the other hand, steadily increases every moment, just like the waxing moon.

But the unusual quality of God’s love is that it never reaches the state of absolute fullness – it keeps on steadily increasing for eternity. This is the miracle of divine love.

So there is a competition that is going on between Radha, who is the form of divine love, and Krishna, who is the form of divine beauty. Radha Rani increases Her love, so Shri Krishna increases His beauty. So Radha Rani’s love increases even more, and Shri Krishna increases His beauty to match. Neither defeats the other in this competition. The bliss of Their love and beauty keeps on steadily increasing forever. This is because both Their body and Their soul is made of sat-chit-ananda. That is why this unique quality is present in their divine personalities. This is the brief meaning of this kirtan verse.

© Jagadguru Kripalu Parishat and Bhakti Bliss, 2009

As long as there is ego, there is no Divine Love

And when there is Divine Love, there would be no sign of ego

cheers   INCREDIBLE ANBAA

for Jason

I realize one of my previous posts may have seemed a bit anti-religion. Maybe it’s important to clarify: I’m not anti-religion. I’m anti-human-beings-as-interpreters-of-messages-no-one-else-can-hear-but-which-give-them-the-idea-that-what-they-think-is-right-should-be-what-everyone-does.

Hmm. No, there are still a couple of… well… okay.

I don’t like “con’s” without corollary “pro’s,” though. It’s far too easy to bitch and moan without suggesting a solution, an alternative or at least a palliative. So after years of research (and that part’s true), I’ve put together what I consider the most universally workable, humane, loving messages from every major religion and laboriously conflated them into a modest proposal for an entirely new creed:

The Church of Don’t Be an Asshole.

I’m still working out the details, of course, but here’s what I’ve got so far.

The Confessional: people need to vent. It’s easier in a dark private place with someone whose opinion is neutral – ask any hooker getting out of a car off Sunset. As a holy confessor, my role would be to constantly and gently guide the needy back to our central belief and suggest ways to realign ourselves spiritually with The Eternal Force Who Is Not A Jerk. Something like this… (dream music)

Random Guilty Conscience: Help me, you, for I feel like an asshole.

Me: What seems to be the problem?

RGC: So, I was dating this guy… I think he really loved me and things were great, but then I met this much hotter guy at a bar and hooked up with him.

Me: Ah. You had sex with him (notice my firm grasp of modern youth vernacular – very important). Questionable move.

RGC: Yeah, well, but I really liked him, and he was soooo hot. So I kind of dumped my boyfriend.

Me: You traded up based on one night of sex? Dumb move. But go on, my child.

RGC: Yeah, right? But he was so sweet that night… anyway, when I texted “Doormat” and told him we were over, he was so upset that I just kind of avoided him for the next few days…

Me: Holy Whoa, my child. You texted him to end the relationship?

RGC: Yeah, well…

Me: And didn’t even have the decency to face him?

RGC: Well, sort of…

Me (thunderously): ASSHOLE MOVE, MY CHILD.

RGC (quiet sobbing): I know! I know! And now he won’t even let me apologize! He won’t talk to me!

Me: Then leave him alone and give him time to think and recover.

RGC: But I love him!

Me: Then put aside your guilt and your need for selfish comfort and let him heal.

RGC: But I… I want him back! (wailing, gnashing of veneers, tearing of highlights)

Me (in the quiet tones of the gathering of the righteous storm): You are… available, my child? Where is Mr. Hot’n'Sweet now?

RGC (whispering): He didn’t work out.

Note: This is where we get to the true “pastoral care” biznatch. TCODBAA doesn’t have penance or excommunication, because those are kind of asshole moves that shift responsibility. Instead, watch as the lamb is led gently back to the fold…

Me: So, my child, allow me to wrap my head around this. Disregarding honesty, history and decency, you attempted in an ASSHOLE way to make an ASSHOLE play for an ASSHOLE whom you considered a boost to your ASSHOLE ego. When he in turn and quite predictably behaved like an ASSHOLE, you attempted to pull another ASSHOLE move and reattach the nice guy to whom you had behaved like a complete and utter… say it with me, child…

RGC: ASSHOLE! (sobbing) Yes! Yes! And now I feel like shit!

Me: Yes, my child. You should.

RGC: Wha- what?

Me: You behaved like an asshole. You’re not a sociopath. You feel awful.

RGC: Help me!

Me: Help you what?

RGC: I – I don’t know. Help me feel better! Tell me what to do!

Me: Yea, verily, my child, do you not recall the First and Only Commandment of TEFWINAJ?

RGC: You mean, “Thou shalt not behave like an asshole?”

Me: There’s your answer.

RGC: I don’t understand.

Me: Yes, you do. You just don’t want to. But lemme ’splain anyway. No, lemme sum up (a little pastoral humor, there).You treated someone like dirt. You were treated like dirt. As is our human wont, you attempted to assuage your feelings of rage and hurt by once again attempting to treat someone like dirt, because that’s what makes us feel temporarily better…

RGC: But I love him!

Me: Well, sucks to be you, huh? The worm has turned, the doormat has flipped, and you’re the one with old gum and dog crap on your face. Think, child. Think as The Eternal would have us think. What would be the NON-asshole move now?

RGC (hesitantly): To… to leave him alone?

Me: Good, good. And?

RGC: To… not do that again?

Me: Good! Good for the spirit, good for the common sense. Leave him the hell alone, get on with your life, and get a goddamned STD test.

RGC: Yes, Your Holiness.

Me: And commit to your heart the Eighteenth Adjunct to the Seventh Proviso of the Holy Creed.

RGC: What?

Me: “One Fuck Does Not a Boyfriend Make,” my child. Go in peace. And Don’t Be an Asshole.

RGC: I Shall Not Be an Asshole.

(dream music)

Tomorrow: Alternatives to Excommunication; or, Public Shaming Without The Guilt.

Don’t forget your God.

He is an awesome God.  A powerful God.  He’s freed you from your jail.  All the doors are opened to you now.  Don’t stay sitting in your jail cell.  You’re free!  And Your freedom has been bought with such a huge price!  You may not think that you deserve it.  And you don’t.   You deserve to rot.  But God has paid your bail, because to Him…we are worth it.  I had a quiet time today.  For the first time in awhile.  And…I don’t usually say like I hear from God or anything.  But…I heard Him cry.  In my soul, I…it wasn’t so much hearing, as it was how I pick up emotions.  But it was as plain as if I saw Him sobbing in front of me.  Because of how I’ve turned from Him.  I’ve broken His heart so many times.  And He still waits for me with open arms.  I don’t see how I have let myself do this.

I’ve slipped so much.  But…you can’t gain back the time you were sitting in your cell.  All you can do is stand up and walk out, take God’s hand, and follow Him.

Even if typhoons have flooded my yard, destoyed my property, have devastated my crops, eroded my land, and buried my home with landslide, I could still smile. At least I am still alive to continue with my dreams.

Yes, there is still hope after the tempest! There is still another day to come after the night which brought us this nightmare. There will still be a tommorrow, a new day which bring us back the sun and the sky to look upon.

So stop now from crying dear little child, don,t worry you can still have a new home, a food to eat, and a backyard to play.

Oh, come and sing with me little child, let’s smile and listen to the music that brings hope into our lives. Keep that fire of strenght lights on your spirit!

Go go go my little child!

This morning I found it.  That long standing vibration that had been eluding me for years.  Lodged deep within my pelvis and hips and spine.  It spoke to me.  It said, “unworthy.”  I realized I did not love myself.
The vibration beneath all of the pain I’d been experiencing lately in my body felt like loathing.  Self loathing.  And I realized the opposite of Love was not Hate.  It was self loathing.   It was an inside job.

I needed to love this pain.  I needed to love me.  This one was slippery because it made no real sense to me that I did not love myself.  I’m funny, talented, sensitive, caring.  I have passion for life.  Who wouldn’t love that?

It dawned on me that as all feelings begin as vibrations, this one had been received by proximity.  Some of the  encounters and people in my early life carried the vibrations of loathing and shame.  I was taught to live this story.  I played like a tuning fork.  By holding back and pushing away feelings, I nurtured this low vibration, and it became my story.  And the farther down I pushed it.

All this talk about Divine Love has been stirring my internal soup.  For months as deep as I could go was anger, with an occasional dip into despair and grief.  The loathing hinted around itself while I mostly snarled at the pain in my body.
And this morning something changed.  A way fell open for me to see.  To feel.  The vibration spoke its name.  And I could see my way through to let it rise.  From the depths of loathing I could find my way up the ladder.  The hand reaching from above was my own.

I started reciting all the things I love about my body, its fortitude and flexibility….  I understood that nurturing and caring for myself would raise this vibe up out of the basement.  I began to feel a lift.  I could love me.
That love was inside of me.  I could love myself.  All that Love I was showering on everyone else…I could shower that on me too.

I do love myself — and, I have been carrying a contradictory vibration deep within — that has kept me from knowing that love was already inside myself.
It kept me searching outward for praise and affection.  I had found some, but nothing that compared to that feeling of Divine pleasure that comes from a deep knowing of the vibration of Love.  I could partner with this Divine flow, and love myself from the inside, out.

“Love is divine. Love is like light. When there is light, darkness cannot exist. When there is love, fear cannot exist.”
~Osho ~

“Love is another name for understanding. It is only in the eyes of love which can see, and the ears of love which can hear…”
~Osho ~

“I teach the unique individual. Respect yourself, love yourself, because there has never been a person like you and there never will be again.”
~Osho ~

Since love grows within you, so beauty grows.
For love is the beauty of the soul.
~ by St. Augustine ~

Absence sharpens love, presence strengthens it.
~ by Thomas Fuller ~

You don’t love a woman because she’s beautiful,
She is beautiful because you love her.
~ by Anonymous ~

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength,
While loving someone deeply gives you courage.
~ by Lao Tzu ~

“All the Buddhas of all the ages have been telling you a very simple fact: Be — don’t try to become. Within these two words, be and becoming, your whole life is contained. Being is enlightenment, becoming is ignorance”
~Osho~