Tomorrow = Week 17 in Review

Friday = Fantasy Gameweek 18 Preview

You’ve been warned.

http://alphainventions.com                 http://blogsurfer.us

Hi guys. Nasty weather in the area…already lost power and internet once.
Quick one…ready?….

Fab Four Fun Facts for 12/9
~1995 The Beatles’ first new tune in 25 years, “Free as a Bird,” debuts on a six-hour ABC documentary on the Fab Four. The Beatles’ “Anthology I” quickly shoots to the top of the charts.  (I had all 3 Anthology’s…wish I hadn’t sold them now…would love to hear them again)
~1961, The Beatles played at the Palais Ballroom in Aldershot to a crowd of just 18 people. The date had not been advertised, owing to the local newspaper’s refusal to accept the promoter’s cheque. After the show The Beatles became rowdy, getting themselves ordered out of town by the local police.

Big 3 Birthdays
~1957 Donny Osmond is born in Ogden, Utah. The seventh son of George and Olive Osmond, Donny becomes a member of the Osmonds in 1963. His biggest solo single is the No. 1 song “Go Away Little Girl.” And who could forget such classics as “Sweet and Innocent” and “Puppy Love”? Then there’s the ground-breaking TV broadcast of The Donny and Marie Show, which was then reprieved in the time-slot now occupied by “The View”. Then you got your “Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat”, Broadway, Vegas, and Dancing with the Stars.

~1932, Born on this day in Memphis, Junior Wells,  blues singer, harmonica player. Worked with Muddy Waters, Van Morrison, Carlos Santana, Bonnie Raitt, toured with The Rolling Stones in 1970. He died on 5th January 1998.

~1969, Born on this day in NYC,  Jakob Dylan. “The Wallflowers won two Grammy Awards, for Best Rock Vocal Performance by a Duo or Group and Best Rock Song. “One Headlight” also won the VH-1 Video of the Year for 1997.” They’ve got 5 albums under their belt but the status of the band is currently unknown since their recording contract ended in 2005, although there was a brief reunion tour in 2007. Jakob remains very active as a solo act, along with stints with the Gold Mountain Rebels.

And Then There’s These…
~1950 Joan Armatrading is born on the Caribbean island of St. Kitts, raised and currently residing in England. Singer/songwriter/pianist/guitarist and a 3-time Grammy nominee.
~1922 Redd Foxx St Louis MO, comedian (Sanford & Son, Redd Foxx Show) 
~1960 1st broadcast of “Coronation Street” on British ITV
~1965 “A Charlie Brown Christmas” premieres 
~1994 5 meter meteor 1994 XM1 passes within 100,000 km of Earth
~1994 Surgeon General Joycelyn Elders resigns after masturbation comments

And More Misc Music Notes
~1984 The Jacksons play their last show together in Los Angeles.
~1964 The John Coltrane Quartet records the jazz classic “Love Supreme.”
~1967, The Doors appeared at the New Haven Arena, New Haven, Connecticut. Before the show a policeman found singer Jim Morrison making out with an 18 year-old girl in a backstage shower and after an argument the policeman sprays mace in Morrison’s face. Once on stage Morrison tells the story of the backstage episode and starts taunting the police who drag him off the stage and arrest him. The crowd riots leaving the venue in disarray and many are arrested. Later over 100 protestors gathered at the police station in demonstration and more arrests were made
~1972, Helen Reddy went to No.1 on the US singles chart with ‘I Am Woman’
~1972, The Moody Blues started a five-week run at No.1 on the US album chart with ‘Seventh Sojourn’.  (Awesome)
~1978, Chic started a seven week run at No.1 on the US singles chart with ‘Le Freak’
~1988, According to a poll released in the US, the music of Neil Diamond was favoured as the best background music for sex, Beethoven was the second choice and Luther Vandross was voted third.  (Ummm, okay…??)
~2000, U2 made their first-ever appearance on the long-running NBC program ‘Saturday Night Live.’ The band played ‘Beautiful Day’ and ‘Elevation.’
~2003, Ozzy Osbourne was admitted to Wexham Park Hospital in Slough, Berkshire after being injured in a quad bike accident at his UK home. The 55 year-old singer broke his collarbone, eight ribs and a vertebra in his neck. News of Osbourne’s accident reached the House of Commons, where the government sent a goodwill message.

Warm and Fuzzy…or Blah-blah-blah
~”The act of giving is more important than the merit of the receiver.”

Bye now…thanks for coming by…and stay safe

On December 9:

1608  John Milton, English poet, was born.

1787 John Dobson, English architect, was born.

1886 Clarence Birdseye, American frozen food manufacturer, was born.

 Birdseye’s double belt freezer

1897 Activist Marguerite Durand founds the feminist daily newspaper, La Fronde, in Paris.

1899 New Zealand troops fired their first shots in the South African war.

1902  Margaret Hamilton, American actress, was born.

1905 In France, the law separating church and state is passed.

1922  Gabriel Narutowicz was announced the first president of Poland.

1929  Bob Hawke, 23rd Prime Minister of Australia, was born.

1931 The Constituent Cortes approves the constitution which establishes the Second Spanish Republic.

1933  Ashleigh Brilliant, American writer (Pot-Shots), was born.

 Ashleigh Brilliant

1934  Dame Judi Dench, English actress, was born.

1941 Beau Bridges, American actor, was born.

1950  Joan Armatrading, St. Kitts-born English singer, was born.

1953 John Malkovich, American actor, was born.

1957 – Donny Osmond, American singer and actor, was born.

1958  Nick Seymour, Australian bassist (Crowded House), was born.

1960 The first episode of Britain’s longest running television soap opera Coronation Street was broadcast.

1961 Tanganyika became independent from Britain.

1962  The Petrified Forest National Park was established in Arizona.

 Chinle Formation

1968 NLS (a system for which hypertext and the computer mouse were developed) was publicly demonstrated for the first time in San Francisco.

 Videoconferencing on NLS

1979 The eradication of the smallpox virus was certified, making smallpox the first and to date only human disease driven to extinction.

1988  The Michael Hughes Bridge in Sligo, Ireland was officially opened.

1990  Lech Wałęsa becomes the first directly elected president of Poland.

Sourced from NZ History Online & Wikipedia.

The Afghan insurrection is a bitch and Tiger Woods seems to have some explaining to do. If he IS a cheating husband, and I’m sure the the retiring Oprah would agree, Tiger’s wife would be the only person entitled to any information from Tige. It looks like the cops have left Tiger alone and simply ticketed the allegedly errant husband. The rest of us should do the same and say, “I’d rather hear stuff about the unbeaten New Orleans Saints and hope to God that they annihilate Minnesota in the Super Bowl.

Now, I suppose I’ve already disappointed many searchers out there but even though I may have already jumped the shark, I think I’ll even pick on President Obama a bit…not because he’s irritated me at all, he hasn’t. I even got a kick out of his pardon of turkeys Courage and Carolina. Where did Courage come from? I don’t know. I just know that I enjoy Presidential Turkey Pardons and have ever since George Bush the 1rst made it a official function of our Commander-in-Chief. That’s pretty neat stuff…as Miley Cyrus and her father Billy Cyrus would say.

You know, I watched the Perky One on CBS News last night and I was amazed at how tiny her eyes were. Also, I was brow furrowed by the way Katie Couric wore her glasses…for the Republican Senator, she didn’t wear glasses but for the next guy, she did. What’s up with that? In the Emergency Department of Olympic Hospital they have TV’s that you can pull really close to your face so you would think that a big network news show could figure out a way to either, put crap closer to Couric or just leave the glasses ON and back everything the hell up. I don’t know if she has myopia, presbyopia, astigmatism or a tic that involves putting glasses on…but one of the Top 3 Networks should be able to pull that one off. They could even have the South Park show animators draw a pair of glasses on her face so she doesn’t look quite so schizophrenic.

You may have noticed that I am trying to see how many searches find their was here because of all of the iconic, social and entertainment references that I’m haphazardly stringing together here. Now I am going to bask in the land of porn so you have been warned, skip this paragraph if you want to…it’s something that Craigslist would most likely have flagged for removal (cowards that they can be…or maybe they’re just lazy, I haven’t figured it out yet.) Anyway, for some odd reason that I cannot POSSIBLY fathom…and I have given FAR too much thought to fathoming…people land on my blog by searching pussy worms. I don’t get that. I did worms on my ceiling once, but never pussy worms. Also, I get a lot of hits from people who search for “women who like to suck pussy”. I don’t really get that. The only pussy I have ever sucked is this one:

…See? Why should men or women obsessed with pussy come here? I discuss pussy’s, dicks and the late Michael Jackson almost as often as I discuss penis’s, men on men sex or lesbianism…and that’s not too often. But still, perverts of all persuasions find their way to Divorcing Rick Kelso. I get submissive, dominant, sado-masochist, great ass lovers as well as huge natural tit aficionados. Oh well, what goes on between consenting adults behind closed doors…

Sometimes I understand the searches. I get a lot of, ‘wife gets revenge on husband’, how much anti-freeze does it take to kill a man’? and ‘Lorena Bobbitt: Where is she now?’ I even understand the searches for deformed penis pictures, after all, I discussed my ex’s messed up member a LOT.

Sadly, there seem to be an inordinate number of ‘My husband left me when I got Multiple Sclerosis’ which explains the searches for ‘How to hide a dead husband”.

Anyway, That’s about it for now, but before I go, I need to annoy people who deserved to be annoyed:

Star Trek Conventions

Van Wilder 3

Greenhouse gasses, global warming and gay marriage

Angelina Jolie

Chelsea Clinton’s fiancé

Where’s Waldo?

Where is Carrot-top performing?

Donny Osmond should have won Dancing with the Stars

Will there be another Rocky movie?

Find your local KKK meeting

The new Windex is yellow, can I still use it on my windows?

Bi-sexual college sluts

Bi-curious men

OK, I’m done for now. If you happen to think of other worthy searches, please, don’t hesitate to put them in the comments section!

And that’s the way it is.

-Walter Cronkite

Oooh…I almost forgot…camel-toe.

In taking the past couple of months to figure out where I would like the next phase of my life to lead me, what sort of principals are the most important to me, and all that other important metaphysical flotsam and jetsam, I have realized at least one truth…

Idle minds really are Satan’s playground:

Admittedly, there is nothing that Khia’s “My Neck, My Back” can’t make immediately sexy, especially when paired with a natural Lothario like Donny Osmond.

Our monthly compendium of stuff that didn’t get a full post, for one reason or another.

There’s just one more month left in the decade (unless you’re one of those weirdos who complain, “the decade begins with 1…”), meaning it’s not too early to start looking back. The 00’s were a decade that likely will never be remembered as a particularly good one for American film; we put it somewhere between the 1950s and maybe – maybe – the 80s in terms of total quality work produced. The amount of dumb, cynical, artless trash far outweighed the good, but then again that’s sadly, probably true of any given time period.

Anyway, here’s our monthly roundup of items of interest that didn’t deserve or receive a full blog post. All our opinions are our own, and all graphics are stuff we found lying around the Internet.

1. This month’s hysteria regarding the release of The Twilight Saga: New Moon came with an earnest attempt at a backlash dogging its wake, as critics from every corner of the media – and especially online – did their best to counter-shout the series’ fans. Not to defend the sparkly vampires, but anyone decrying the phenomenon shouldn’t feel surprised at its popularity. Vampires are a steady, resurgent franchise in American culture, and it makes sense that a version catering to the American Idol generation would surface sooner or later. If Twilight is superficial, mawkish, and clumsily obtuse, it’s only giving its audience what they’ve come to expect from pop entertainment.

2. While we’re on the subject of pop culture and what’s wrong with it, two news items this past week about David Hasselhoff and Donny Osmond underscored a major reason for the current media malaise. Celebrities don’t burn out anymore. They fade… and fade… and fade away. The proliferation of cable channels and other media outlets means everyone gets camera time long after their 15 minutes have worn off. Except all that detritus has become dead weight upon the public radar, with chances for the emergence of new talent becoming that much more remote. Much like pop music at the end of the 1980s, the film and TV industries are in desperate need of fresh air, the sooner the better. More than that, the industries have got to stop cashing in on the past because it’s cheap and safe.

3. Someone else said – but we’re happy to originate the idea – that George Clooney has two screen personae: there’s the talented ensemble actor, the guy that does offbeat work like O Brother, Where Art Thou and The Men Who Stare At Goats, and there’s his American Leading Man mode that you see in stuff like Michael Clatyon and the Ocean’s saga. We’re looking forward to December’s Up In The Air because it might present the first combination of the two while finally getting Gorgeous George the widespread critical respect he’s deserved for years. Here’s the trailer, in the unlikely event you haven’t seen it yet:

Morgan Freeman as Nelson Mandela

4. Another pervasive trailer this month previewed Clint Eastwood’s new Invictus, about the true story of South African president Nelson Mandela’s attempt to bring the post-Apartheid nation together via the 1995 Rugby World Cup games. While the idea of Matt Damon playing a rugby champion isn’t really surprising, the casting of Morgan Freeman as Mandela is one of those lightning-strike “why hasn’t this happened already” castings that happen every blue moon or so. It also makes us wish by free association that Steven Spielberg would make his Liam Neeson-starring biopic of Abraham Lincoln already. Still and all, props to Freeman for taking the role and props to Eastwood for tackling such unexpected (for him) material. The film debuts December 11.

Burrows to join L&O: CI

5. This time last year we bitched that the USA Network couldn’t nail down a season premiere for its Law & Order: Criminal Intent franchise. Now the show’s reportedly getting a virtually all-new cast when it returns “early” next year. Series regulars Vincent D’Onofrio, Kathryn Erbe, Eric Bogosian and Julianne Nicholson will all depart after the series’ ninth season opener. Saffron Burrows (The Bank Job) replaces Nicholson, while Bogosian will be replaced by Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio (The Perfect Storm). The newer, streamlined show will feature sole returning star Jeff Goldblum in every episode.

Though we like Goldblum as an actor and in his L&O: CI role, we also remember that his last effort at headlining a detective show lasted seven weeks, even with Graham Yost (Band of Brothers) as showrunner. We liked that show, too.

6. Elsewhere on basic cable, TNT announced this month they would pick up broadcast rights to Southland, the promising cop drama that NBC stupidly cancelled in October. Possibly as a way to afford the ensemble cast, the network has dropped their original series Raising The Bar from its schedule, with a second season for Dark Blue, its other cop show, stuck in limbo. Meanwhile their new Men of A Certain Age premieres next Monday. Anything with Andre Braugher or Scott Bakula has got our attention for at least a few weeks, and this has them both.

Renner in The Hurt Locker

7. Already among the year’s – if not the decade’s – most highly praised films despite only a limited release last summer, The Hurt Locker premieres on DVD and Blu-Ray January 12. The gritty drama co-stars Jeremy Renner, one of the best young actors around right now following his superb performances in ABC’s The Unusuals and onscreen in 2007’s The Assassination of Jesse James By The Coward Robert Ford. We’re glad his turn here is getting him some attention.

We value our female readership, and stuff like this never hurts.

8. You know it’s close to December when three of the top ten films have “Oscar Bait” written all over them. The Blind Side currently makes the most money (despite scathing reviews), while Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire and The Road are both still building momentum. In light of the sweeping changes made to the Academy’s voting process this year, however, it’s still too early to guess which film has the inside track towards Best Picture. If we had to suppose, we imagine Rob Marshall’s Nine will take the statue. It’s got a shitload of razzle dazzle (remember Marshall’s Chicago won in 2003), a screenplay co-written by the late Anthony Minghella, and a broad cast of flashy actors like Daniel Day-Lewis and Nicole Kidman. In years past such a combination would be like crack for Academy voters, but the new rules could change things up.

Watch the embedding—proof HD Trailer for Nine here, much of which looks an awful lot like an Oscar ceremony musical number.

Thanks for reading. We were a day late posting this, and we apologize for the delay – real life’s been pimp-slapping our writing time lately. We’ll be back later this week.

- Michael Kabel

:: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: :: ::

Did Donny Osmond make an impression on the writer of Yahoo! TV’s ”Primetime in No Time”?

So the writer grew up watching “The Donny and Marie Show,” but still can’t spell his name correctly. I guess Donny didn’t make such a good impression after all.

Earlier, I was browsing Youtube and stumbled upon this video of Mulan. I watched this and I became nostalgic. I really missed watching this movie and this part is my most favorite also my favorite soundtrack from Mulan too. When I was younger, it became habit for me and my sister to watch Mulan (we had a Mulan VCD at home) every Christmas break and we never get tired of watching it. Oh, I really miss those days.

I also learned earlier that Jackie Chan had a version of this song in Mandarin and in Cantonese, I’m not quite sure if he was the one who did the Chinese dubbing though. I saw a Japanese version too.

My other favorite soundtrack from Mulan which is Reflection, sung by Leah Salonga and popularized by Christina Aguilera also had Spanish, Japanese and Korean rendition too which I think are good. I liked how the Japanese and Korean version turned out.

I’ll Make a Man Out of You by Donny Osmond

Let’s get down to business
To defeat the Huns
Did they send me daughters
When I asked for sons?
You’re the saddest bunch
I ever met
But you can bet
Before we’re through
Mister, I’ll make a man
out of you

Tranquil as a forest
But on fire within
Once you find your center
you are sure to win
You’re a spineless, pale
pathetic lot
And you haven’t got a clue
Somehow I’ll make a man
out of you

I’m never gonna catch
my breath
Say good-bye to those
who knew me
Boy, was I a fool in school
for cutting gym
This guy’s got ‘em
scared to death
Hope he doesn’t see
right through me
evan lucky crikets can’t
make her a him

(Be a man)
We must be swift as
the coursing river
(Be a man)
With all the force
of a great typhoon
(Be a man)
With all the strength
of a raging fire
Mysterious as the
dark side of the moon

Time is racing toward us
till the Huns arrive
brother stands with brother
and we will survive
were perpared to face
the rage of war and
we know just what to
i knew i’d make a man
out of you!

(Be a man)
We must be swift as
the coursing river
(Be a man)
With all the force
of a great typhoon
(Be a man)
With all the strength
of a raging fire
Mysterious as the
dark side of the moon

First of all, congratulations to Donny Osmond and Kym Johnson on winning Dancing With The Stars last week. Their freestyle in the final was amazing, and would, I think, have won them the contest by itself, although I still think that Donny was pulling in the most votes for most of the contest.

This dance captured Donny’s personality perfectly, and allowed him to perform to his fullest, so it never really looked like Kym was holding back too much. I feel a little bad for Mya and Dmitry, but their freestyle was not as good. She may have been the technically better dancer, and in some seasons that has been enough (yes Kristi Yamaguchi, I mean you) but she started on a different level and didn’t improve at all. It wasn’t all her fault, Dmitry made some bad choices with the choreography, but I think that if they had spent more time refining her already very good technique, and less on crowd-pleasing/judge baiting routines, she would have got more support. I just don’t know if it would have been enough to derail the Osmond train. At the start of the season, I was unconvinced about him, mainly due to my memories of Marie, but he won me round. Kym is now appearing on Burn The Floor on Broadway with Maks, and I would love to see that come over here and tour, as the chances of me getting to New York any time soon are tiny!

So, back to Strictly. This week, the remaining couples performed one of two new dances, Charleston or Rock and Roll, plus a group competition Viennese Waltz. Overall, it appears the Charlestons were more popular, as the two couples dancing Rock and Roll ended up in the dance off. I must admit, I found the Charlestons more entertaining, but we only had two Rock and Rolls to choose from, which skewed things a little, for me. This was never going to be a great dance for Natalie and Vincent, because much emphasis is given to the aerial elements, ie throws, lifts and drops. Whilst Natalie claimed this was hard for them, being the same height, that really wasn’t the problem. Rachel Stevens was about an inch or so shorter than Natalie, but she and Vincent managed some beautiful lifts in their AS and Argentine Tango last year, with a similar height difference.  For me, this was a failing of the outside choreographers. Rock and Roll should be fun to watch, so they should have found a way for Natalie to lift Vincent. There were a few clips on It Takes Two showing him trying and failing to do forward rolls and cartwheels, but the experts should have come up with something they could do. The routine they ended up with was sticky, flat and not nearly as entertaining as it should have been, and that was only in part due to the execution.

Ricky Whittle and Natalie Lowe were also criticised for a lacklustre routine, but Ricky has written on his blog that he did not get the time with the main choreographers that the other couples did, and a few hours before the show, when they finally saw them, he and Natalie were instructed to tone down their routine. If that was the case, I feel bad for them. If the show wishes to introduce new dances and the pro dancers need help, then they should get it equally if they want it. I thought the judges were harsh on Ricky, but at the same time, his dance-off performance was miles better than the original. I think it would be risky to deduce that he has no public support from his dance off appearance this weekend – he had a bad week in terms of PR, no appearance on ITT, and a lacklustre first performance. In addition, the fact that he has been safe every other week may have influenced voters. I think the show would be much poorer without him, as he is by far the most versatile dancer they currently have.

For the Charlestons, my favourite by far was Chris and Ola’s. It wasn’t technically perfect, but it was so much fun to watch. Karen Hardy was on BBC Breakfast today, and she thought had Chris danced later in the show, he probably would have got a 10. Ali and Brian’s dance, whilst technically very good, didn’t have the originality that Chris and Ola’s did, which may have been a failing of the ‘experts’ but I thought the judges over-marked her for finally showing a bit of personality. Laila and Anton were better than I expected, although I admit to having very low expectations, but she had a strange, almost bored look on her face for a lot of it, which I can’t decide if was her acting the part or just trying to remember the routine. If I had been ranking them, I’d have gone for Chris, Laila then Ali, but I am not a judge, just a viewer.

The group competitive VW was very hard to watch, as we obviously only got to follow whoever the camera was on at any one time, so we are required to defer to the judges more than may be usual for this dance. I disagree with their outcome though, as Brian and Ali clearly collided with Ricky and Natalie toward the end, and Brian should have had the ability to avoid that. Given that the two remaining males were required to lead the dance, whilst the girls had to follow, I find it quite shocking that the judges believed Ali and Brian to be the best, and gave her a perfect score. I believe Ricky did the best job, and I would have put Chris and Laila second, followed by Ali and then Natalie.

I agree that the correct celebrity was eliminated, on the dance off performance alone, Ricky danced his socks off, whilst Natalie was really no better than first time around.

This week, we have two individual dances, for the first time since weeks 1 and 2. Chris and Ola have Waltz and Samba (eek!), Ali and Brian have Tango and Samba, Ricky and Natalie have Foxtrot and Cha Cha Cha, whilst Laila and Anton have American Smooth and Salsa. There is quite the possibility for a disaster for all four couples. Samba is a fiendishly hard dance, it’s rarely done well on Strictly and I’m not sure if Ola has ever danced this. Plus, if they get help from James, it’s not been a great dance for him in the past. Their waltz should be fabulous though.I don’t think either of Ali’s dances will suit her – Samba because it’s going to be out of her comfort zone, and I think her latin so far has all been overrated, and Tango because it requires an attitude she hasn’t yet shown – she grimaced her way through the Paso with the prevoius foot injury, which makes it hard to compare.

Ricky’s foxtrot should be very good, but he’ll probably get his pigeon toes pointed out again,  while he is likely to be the only one to go a really good latin with his Cha Cha Cha. Laila’s American Smooth could be great, but might suffer from being overhyped, in the same way their VW did, whilst the less I consider their Salsa the better. If she decides she doesn’t like it, then I expect it will rival the Samba and Jive for awfulness, but will probably be blamed on Anton again. She hasn’t yet done a good latin dance, in my opinion – she forgot half of the Jive, the Samba was woeful, there were lifts in the Paso, and she stopped in the Rumba, which she also didn’t like. I am half expecting another injury late on Friday/early Saturday.

It’s that ‘joyous time of year’ again. And it’s funny how much this season has changed over time and how much of it has remained the same.

When I was a little kid, I can remember adults trying to put on their best face making the season bright and bountiful. But behind the holly-wreathed doors, I would hear the bitching and complaining about how women were the ones who would have to make the season happen if the season were to happen at all.

The gripes would include having to do all the planning, the baking, the holiday card addressing (and keeping track of the new addresses, the moves, the cards returned from old addresses or deaths) and then do all the meal planning, meal shopping, gift planning and shopping and wrapping and packing for mailing, standing in line at the post-office, planning for the unexpected drop-by guests, handling relative accommodating for overnight stays, stressing over the lack of space for everyone and dealing with airport pickups and returns, and of course the cleaning before visitors, cleaning up after baking and cleaning up before stay overs and before the meal. And this cleaning process also included cleaning the silver, bringing out special occasion linens and doing that clean up, preparation and then the decoration, tree, walls, lights and making sure there were festive candles, scents, firewood and the list goes on. This was all followed by also preparing for care packages of leftovers and then writing of all the thank you notes and preparing for New Year.

There would be this ‘knowing’ look in the aisles of stores while grocery shopping, big sighs in the lines where people waited with armfuls of goodies, with a glimmer of disgust and frustration. But at the end of it all – everyone was ‘happy.’ Of course the complaint would be that it took nearly two months to prepare for a moment where the meal was gulped down in less than twenty minutes and the present opening took less than ten. It’s kind of like a rollercoaster ride where you wait in line for three hours and the ride is over in two minutes.

The holidays happen the same time every year. But each year people get stressed, and sick with the flu from the stress, late hours, overtaxing of the body, mind and spirit.

It’s pretty amazing though that at this time of year, the average human who celebrates this one season can do all of this and survive it.

During regular life, away from the holiday season – life can be and is, just as hectic, but it’s not as glaring. Whether it’s dealing with birthdays, weddings, graduations, anniversaries, funerals, births, moving, job changes, commutes, house buying or selling, everyday task-mastering of business, personal, family, friends, neighbors, occasions, obligations and events…. Life can be crazy.

And whether you are dealing with crisis of illness and disease, accident or financial, career or family matter, life has a series of bumpy roads, obstacle courses and uphill battles to resolve and overcome.

But if it weren’t for all this, would there be the joy, peace and elation of life’s moments of gliding? Perhaps if it weren’t for all this, there would be no true appreciation and enjoyment of the good times, great moments of victory, achievement, accomplishment and endurance…

Think about that. If everything in life were easy, there wouldn’t be motivation to do much of anything. People would get laxed and lazy, disconnected by nature due to the fact that everything would be so joyous and effortless that they would end up having no emotional connection to the outcome of anything because nothing was put into it.

Nothing was more clear to me, than after watching Donny Osmond win Dancing With The Stars. The road up until his win was difficult because it wasn’t just the road he was on, it was the past roads behind him, the current road working hard to achieve the win and the road ahead of him as the outcome based on his performance all rolled into one.

When you live in a spotlight of expectation, expectation puts added pressure on you. When you are a perfectionist living with this spotlight, your self-imposed pressure can get the best of you. When you have had difficulty in the past dealing with social anxiety disorder in the arena of performance, and are performing with a broken toe, the flu and flying back and forth between Los Angeles, Las Vegas and Utah non-stop all week and performing a regular non-stop gig, even more so.

When you are trying not to let down a bunch of long-time fans who have been by your side for the past 46 years of performing, being the oldest contestant still in the running trying to keep up energy-wise with your peers who are the age of your own kids, that alone is huge. But when you are doing all this knowing you want the time you’ve spent away from your wife and kids will not have been for nothing, while also dealing with your own personal friendly sibling rivalry to come out ahead (also knowing you were winning for her as well – because at the time when she was performing, she was dealing with the death of her father, her own divorce and other family issues, while trying to lose weight to get healthy) well… the tears of joy behind the victory say more than you’re just happy you won.

We all go through the rocky road of life’s events. We all endure moments of difficulty, challenge and a path full of obstacles to navigate around, many emotionally, mentally and physically taxing times to juggle simultaneously while having a smile on our faces.

But again, if it were not for all this, the moments of victory will not have been as sweet. So whether it’s a holiday, a season, a life event, a competition or simply a moment to see what you’re made of …. We must remember that in order to enjoy the GLIDE in life, we must power through the rocky road.

© 2009 Queena Verbosity 100% Real Words
Media Monster Communications, Inc.
Stacey Kumagai

http://www.100percentrealwords.blogspot.com

http://hubpages.com/profile/mediamonster

http://www.braingasm.com

Joy in the Week of November 23

Donny Osmond with partner Kym - winners of DWTS

1. Donny Osmond is popular again – Congratulations to my favourite teen idol of the 70’s, and I hope he get steady ‘quality’ work from the exposure. I saw that iTunes reissued his greatest music hits the morning after his win! This is not a Puppy Love – obviously.

2. Ivana Santilli’s Confused Lil Boy – As one male DJ has called it, the “woman’s anthem for the winter”. Hear it at her site. Motivating workout music!

 3. Ugly Betty’s new season – Betty has a new look, but still retains the old Betty-ness. Betty is in a new job and so are most of the characters. The magazine’s struggles continue, using the backdrop of the current US economic crisis (topical!). Characters are working through a variety of emotional growing pains and we care about even the shallowest characters of seasons past. And it all works again! Love that it’s on Friday night, when nothing else is on, too.

SuperSlims Brown Rice Crisps

4. Food obsessions of the week and they are all CARBS! – a) SuperSlim Brown Rice Crisps (imported from Taiwan) – These crisps can hold up as crackers with even the hardest of cheeses and they are very tasty, especially the Black Sesame variety. And they are 80 calories for 13 crackers! I have found them in every mainstream grocery store, often in the Health food area or with all the other crackers, b) Delifrance’s Pure Butter Croissants and Pains de Chocolat – From the famous French bakery chain come these authentic frozen pastries that bake up perfectly after 18 minutes; available in the Toronto area at Longo’s; unlike any of the other frozen croissants, these are the real thing and fill the house with an amazing morning aroma, c) Dimplflmeier’s 7 Grains Bread – hearty, whole grain bread that lasts forever and when toasted is a dream with peanut butter or dipped in winter soups!

5. Chorizo and Kale Soup - The magazine I pulled this from called it Tuscan Stew but it doesn’t have many true Tuscan elements to it, and is more a fusion of Spanish, Hungarian and Tuscan flavours. But it is the best! The recipe is fairly vague in terms of quantity, so you need to make it a few times until you get it to the flavouring you like (probably the only real ’Italian’ thing about it!). But even the number of times I’ve made it with varying spicing elements, each time has been delicious.

Chorizo and Kale Soup - photo is not from this recipe but looks closest to it

Here goes the vague recipe: In a stock pot, saute 2 leeks (sliced thinly) in a few tbsp of olive oil over med-high heat. Keep checking for sticking and add more oil if you need it. Stir in 1 long or 2 dried chorizo sausages (sliced). Use the real Portuguese chorizo for the best flavour and I prefer using the dried variety, it’s pricier though. Also add some sliced fresh garlic (a few cloves will do it) and some smoked paprika – I like lots of it, a few tbsp or add more to taste. Add 1 litre of good quality chicken stock, and simmer everything together for about 15 – 20 minutes on lower heat. While the stock and sausage are simmering, prepare 1 bunch of cavolo nero kale leaves (otherwise known as black kale) by cleaning, and removing and discarding the stalks and most of the tough vein that runs through the centre of the leave. Then chop it into bite-size (think ’soup spoon-size’) pieces. Add to the stock, the chopped kale, 1 can of drained and rinsed cannellini beans (or white kidneys), a few splashes of dry white wine, and some chopped fresh parsley (a few tbsp). Let this all stew together until the soup comes to a good boil and the kale is nicely wilted. Serve with toasted ciabatta bread (lightly oiled and salted) and pieces of your favourite hard cheeses (Manchego, Pecorino) and some of that white wine. A great light supper! And leftovers are good too, but the flavours start to mellow out the longer you leave it.

… Or Not

1. The passing of Haydain Neale of Jacksoul – After battling back from a devastating motorcycle accident last year, he next had to face lung cancer. Such a great voice and great talent, gone too soon.

2. The Old Navy Mannequin commercials – Annoying! Not clever. Go back to real people!

3. Shakira doing a Beyonce imitation on SYTYCD – She doesn’t need to be someone else.

4. U.S. Black Friday shopping tradition comes to Canada - Several retailers this week in Canada (and some with Canadian ownership) were introducing their new Black Friday sales, touting it as a new tradition that we should adopt. The last thing we need is a shopping tradition – how about bringing back do-it-yourself pickles or welcome-wagon traditions instead!

Singer, actress and dancer Mya, who just concluded her run on ABC’s hit TV show “Dancing With The Stars,” (DWTS) will star on January’s New Year’s cover of BE! (Beauty Entertainment) Magazine. Mya is the third Hollywood celebrity to grace the cover of Beauty Entertainment Magazine, Salon City’s new monthly print, digital and online publication that debuted this fall. Mya was photographed exclusively for BE!’s cover and inside feature by Hollywood’s Keith Munyan, known for his ability to capture the beauty, energy and excitement of a star like Mya. BE! Magazine’s style director, Christopher Mannor, orchestrated the shoot and brought together L.A.’s finest session artists to create a new look for Mya.

I’d like to start off by stating that I absolutely love the Damned. They have given me a great deal of pleasure over the years, and some of my fondest memories are of hearing Damned, Damned, Damned for the first time and seeing them play live at the Locarno in  Portsmouth, supported by the Anti Nowhere League.

I managed to catch them at Rebellion earlier in the year, and on Wednesday I went to see them, although they were support to Motorhead. (Honorable mention to Girlschool, also on the bill, with Blitzkriegs Jax on guitar). They opened with New Rose and from that moment I knew I was going to be dissapointed. To be fair to them the crowd seemed to really love them, and maybe I’m still living in the past, but I wanted New Rose to sound like New Rose – the New Rose – the very first vinyl pressing of a Punk song ever…a piece of history. Musically it was the same, vocally it could have been Whitney Houston.

Maybe Dave Vanian is bored with singing the same old stuff for 30 years and he want to put some variety in his life…and I think for that its understandable…but I paid £25 to hear the Damned as I wanted to hear them, not what I got at all.

The week before I managed to catch the Specials in Brighton, another 30 year tour and another band on the nostalgia bandwagon….but what a band, what a show and what a difference. Every song was sung as I remembered it being, the whole blace was bouncing and I left through the pouring rain with a smile on my face. It was what I’d paid for, my memories, my songs and my experiences brought back for a few hours.

And Donny Osmond? I watched an interview with him once where he told the story of singing Puppy Love in a rock style cos he was bored with it. Then one day a fan asked him why he ruined their memory of the song. It affected him and he now sings songs in the way he sold them. Please take note Mr Vanian…to me and lots like me, you are a hero. The Damned are one of the greatest bands ever and I for one would like to hear New Rose as it was recorded by the Damned, not a night club singer.

So… Donny Osmond won DWTS! I am sooo happy about that! Like I said before, his freestyle was AMAZING on the finale!! I personally didn’t watch  the show, but I sure heard my mom cheering from the other room! LOL

Coffee Art Updated

I Know I have Blogged It Before But …I dont care…The Funk Brothers are my hero’s and these clips are from my all time favourite film

19.2 million people watch Donny Osmond win

NEW YORK — An estimated 19.2 million people watched Donny Osmond win “Dancing With the Stars” — the smallest audience for the show’s finale since the first season. This was the ninth edition of the contest, one of television’s most popular shows. The Nielsen Co. says ratings have been down all season for the show, an indication that viewers weren’t as attached to the contestants as they had in the past. Osmond said the show has been a highlight in a career of ups and downs. He competed during the show’s finale Tuesday against singer Mya and Kelly Osbourne, daughter of rock star Ozzy Osbourne.

Donny Osmond was declared the new champion of “Dancing With Stars” on Tuesday night, taking home the show’s mirror ball trophy in the season finale of the ABC contest reality program. Osmond, the former teen pop star of the singing Osmond family, said the show has been a highlight in a career of ups and downs. “I did it!” Osmond exclaimed. He promptly rushed to the audience and plucked out his wife, Debbie, whom he carried across the stage. Helping push Osmond over the top was the tango he performed Tuesday with his professional dancing partner, Kym Johnson. Judge Carrie Ann Inaba hailed it as “artistry in motion.” It earned the top score of the final performances. Three celebrities made it to the finale of the show’s ninth season — Osmond, Mya and Kelly Osbourne, the daughter of Ozzy and Sharon Osbourne. The show picks a winner with a combination of judges’ scores and viewer votes. Mya entered as the favorite, having won the highest scores on Monday’s show. Dancing with Dmitry Chaplin, she performed a jive. “I’m just so happy to have made it to the finals,” Mya said after the loss. The 30-year-old singer is most famous for collaborating on the Grammy-winning hit “Lady Marmalade” from the soundtrack of 2001’s “Moulin Rouge!” Osbourne was the first of the three eliminated. With her famous family — Ozzy, Sharon and Jack — looking on, Osbourne and professional partner Louis Van Amstel danced to a cover of Ray LaMontagne’s “Trouble.” The 25-year-old was clearly moved and began crying after her last dance She thanked the audience and said she had “grown so much” during the show. Co-host Samantha Harris said Osbourne had become “a swan.” The finale culminated a season of good ratings for “Dancing With the Stars,” which consistently ranked as one of the most-watched shows of the fall. The contestant who grabbed the most headlines, former Congressman Tom DeLay, had to withdraw in the third week of competition because of stress fractures in both feet. A healed DeLay returned Tuesday night to dance the Texas two-step routine he had hoped to perform. All former contestants returned, including former Dallas Cowboys receiver Michael Irvin, who performed a dance-off to the theme of “Monday Night Football” with another NFL receiving great, Jerry Rice, who was a contestant on the second season of “Dancing With the Stars.” The judges declared Rice the winner. Pop singer Aaron Carter, voted off this season, performed a dance to the theme of “The Muppet Show.” Animal took the drums, while Miss Piggy lurked backstage. Mistakes on the dance floor weren’t the only missteps of ABC’s live broadcast. At the top of the show, as highlights from Monday’s show ran, the video froze on shot of Miss Piggy, prompting host Tom Bergeron to remind viewers that the broadcast was live and send the show to an early commercial break. Whitney Houston also made a guest appearance to perform her “Million Dollar Bill” and the fitting “I Wanna Dance With Somebody.” Gymnast Shawn Johnson won last season’s “Dancing With the Stars.” ABC can expect high ratings for Tuesday’s finale. Last week’s results show attracted an audience of 16.2 million.

Amazing !!!

Astounding !!!

Was Jesus taught by the Druids of Glastonbury? New film claims it is possible he came to England

As a book of record the New Testament doesn’t do too well on the early life of Jesus Christ. The large holes may explain why so many outlandish theories have been able to build up about what the Son of God got up to as a boy. But among those myths most perpetuated is that he visited Britain  -  an idea immortalised in the opening lines of William Blake’s Jerusalem.

But did Jesus build a chapel beneath Glastonbury Abbey (pictured here), as a new film suggests?

Now a film has sought to add flesh to the fable by claiming it’s perfectly plausible the Messiah made an educational trip to Glastonbury. And Did Those Feet explores the idea that Jesus accompanied his supposed uncle, Joseph of Arimathaea, on a business trip to the tin mines of the South-West. Whilst there, it is claimed he took the opportunity to further his maths by studying under druids. Unsurprisingly, the documentary stops short of concluding the visit did take place, noting ‘Jesus’s shoe has not turned up’. However, the makers insist that while the visit is unproven, it is possible. The theory is that he arrived by sea, following established trading routes, before visiting several places in the West Country. In the film, Dr Gordon Strachan, a Church of Scotland minister, says it is plausible Jesus came to further his education. The country is thought to have been at the forefront of learning 2,000 years ago, with mathematics particularly strong. Ted Harrison, the film’s director, said: ‘If somebody was wanting to learn about the spirituality and thinking not just of the Jews but also the classical and Greek world he would have to come to Britain, which was the centre of learning at the time. ‘Jesus was a young man curious to find out about all sorts of things. ‘We know there is a huge gap in the life of Jesus between when he was born and when his ministry started.

‘He would have come to learn what was being taught about astronomy and geometry which was being taught at “universities” run by druids at the time.’Mr Harrison, a former BBC religious affairs correspondent, says Jesus may just have been a boy when he left the Middle East for England.Tresanton St Mawes in the west country which looks towards the Roseland peninsula, where the film claims Jesus spent some time He said: ‘He started the ministry at about the age of 30. There is only one mention in the Bible between his birth and the start of the ministry.’That is when he was around the age of 12 and went to the temple and astounded the learned experts with his knowledge. One could speculate he had just come back at that point.’ Alternatively, he may have made the visit when in his teens or 20s and used his earnings as a carpenter to fund it. Jesus is said to have built a chapel in Glastonbury  -  and when theologian St Augustine heard of it 1,400 years ago, he wrote to the Pope to tell him about it. Mr Harrison said: ‘The concrete evidence is this reference by St Augustine that at Glastonbury there was a small building or church that was put up by Jesus.’He added that Blake’s hymn Jerusalem refers to the visit with its opening lines: ‘And did those feet in ancient time Walk upon England’s mountains green? And was the holy Lamb of God on England’s pleasant pasture seen?’Mr Harrison said there were ‘no archaeological finds’ to back up the myth, but ‘by exploring the legend, we are opening up a fascinating new insight into early Christianity’.

How much would you spend to spice up your love life? Sales of luxury lingerie costing up to £900 rocket in the run-up to Christmas

I Love To See A Woman In Exquisite Lingerie….But Im Sorry….The Feather One Does Nothing For Me

Despite the unstable economy and looming expense of Christmas, it seems couples are determined not to neglect their love life – whatever the cost. Women across the country are snapping up luxury corsets in a bid to add a touch of spice in the bedroom, a leading retailer said today. Selfridges said sales of its luxury fashion corsets were up 70% as stocks of Bordelle’s £900 feather girdle sold out in 24 hours at its Oxford Street store in central London.

Beat the boredom: The Bordelle £900 feather girdle sold out within 24 hours

Luxury lingerie sales were up across the country, with the average spend increasing by 16% compared with this time last year at Selfridges’ stores in Birmingham, London and Manchester. British designer Alex Popa, 27, said: ‘The items are more flexible than the traditional pieces,’ said Miss Popa. ‘If you are daring enough you could pair a corset with a pair of leggings and go out clubbing or to a party, but they can also be worn in the boudoir. ‘It is more of a mix between outer-wear and underwear. There was nothing out there that was doing in-between. Lingerie was very static but my designs focus more on design. ‘It has helped a lot that we are popular with celebrities. We made one of our designs for Lady Gaga, and we have made items for Shakira as well as pieces for Christina Aguilera’s new movie Burlesque.

Wrapped up: Shoppers are desperate to snap up Bordelle’s Angela Cage £365 bandage dress

Tie me up: A more modest monochrome version

‘Everything is made in my workshop in London. We don’t out-source anything and make it with a technique which is unique to us. The pieces are expensive, but we have had people who have wanted to get stuff from us for some time and they have saved up to buy a piece.’ With winter drawing in and nights getting longer, women are choosing to invest in quality lingerie rather than spend on nights out. And British luxury lingerie brand Myla is cashing in on the new trend – with the launch of a £350 silk ‘Christmas’ corset, which will be unveiled by queen of burlesque, Immodesty Blaze, in Selfridges’ Oxford Street window tomorrow morning. Helen Attwood, Selfridges’ head buyer for lingerie, said: ‘The trend for underwear worn as outerwear is more popular than ever with customers investing more in fashion that adds a touch of spice to everyday life.’

And the driving force behind the sudden surge? Hollywood of course.

Sales of Bordelle’s Angela Cage £365 bandage dress also soared by 90% after 21-year-old Rihanna stepped out in a similar white leather bandage catsuit at the American Music Awards in Los Angeles earlier this week. The Bajan singer flashed the flesh on stage in a futuristic white catsuit with white shoulderpads, which shot lasers across the stage. Copies of the more modest version will no doubt be available on the High Street soon as teenagers scramble to covet the barely-there look. Women certainly appear to be doing their bit to boost the economy as high-end cosmetics are also bucking the recession with a surge in sales, according to recent figures. And what better way to cheer her up than some sexy underwear and a bit of red lipstick?

The look was made popular by Rihanna on stage at the American Music Awards

An estimated 19.2 million people watched Donny Osmond last night win “Dancing With The Stars” — the smallest audience for the show’s finale since the first season – and take home the show’s traditional mirrored ball trophy in the season finale of the ABC TV contest reality program. 

Helping push Osmond over the top was the tango he performed Tuesday with his professional dancing partner, Kym Johnson. Judge Carrie Ann Inaba hailed his performance as “artistry in motion.” It earned the top score of the final performances. 

Osmond, the former teen pop star of the iconic singing Osmond family, said the show has been a highlight in a career of ups and downs.  

The 52-year-old showbiz veteran, who headlines at the Flamingo in Las Vegas with his sister, Marie, has been performing almost all of his life, but said that there’s a difference between cutting albums and selling records and dancing competitively. 

Donny Osmond now holds the distinction of being the first Las Vegas headliner to win “Dancing’ while having a show on the Las Vegas Strip. 

He competed during the show’s finale Tuesday against singer Mya and Kelly Osbourne, daughter of rock star Ozzy Osbourne. 

Mistakes on the dance floor during the season weren’t the only missteps of ABC’s live broadcast. At the top of Tuesday’s show, as highlights from Monday’s show ran, the video froze on shot of Miss Piggy, prompting host Tom Bergeron to remind viewers that the broadcast was live and send the show to an early commercial break. 

This was the ninth edition of the contest, one of television’s most popular shows. The Nielsen Co. says ratings have been down all season for the show, an indication that viewers weren’t as attached to the contestants as they had in the past.

You would have to go all the way back to the first season of Dancing With the Stars to find a Final Round that didn’t feature an athlete. One could argue about the athletic status of Helio Castroneves in Season 5 – he unquestionably participates in a sport, but it is not a sport that automatically conveys the physical advantages enjoyed by the likes of Apolo Ohno and Shawn Johnson.

But with its mix of dangerous bloat and brilliant flourishes within that bloat, you could call this DWTS’s Fat Elvis Season. That considered, it is fitting that we have an All-Entertainers Finale. All three surviving contenders know the spotlight well. All three surviving contenders, it must be admitted, have danced for a paying audience prior to their participation. But we have had the opportunity to watch them grow, sweat, and suffer, as well as reveal something of themselves through the performance gauntlet.

No one came in guaranteed a spot in this showdown. Donny recovered from more than one mistake-riddled performance, bouncing back stronger each time. Kelly has taken a sense of self-worth that looked like a small lump of cherry Jell-O, and somehow blossomed into an emotive, charismatic, shockingly poised young woman on the floor. And Mýa has written a textbook on how to work this show to win it; eschewing all drama, carrying herself with modest, quiet confidence, and standing toe-to-toe with her professional partner and earning a hearing for her opinions. Past winning pros like Cheryl and Derek have been able to carry partners across the finish line. Barring the kind of self-destruction of which she has betrayed no hint all season, Mýa looks like she’ll carry herself; and Dmitry, with her.

So we finally get a 90-minute competition night – it’s not really any relief, since tomorrow is the plus-sized Season Finale. Even with some conspicuously long commercial breaks, and our Finalists performing three dances a piece, it would have taken some God’a-mighty padding to fill that last half-hour. I would never say they’re incapable of it, nor reluctant to do it. But we have been spared.

KELLY OSBOURNE/LOUIS VAN AMSTEL – Argentine Tango – 26/30

We’re treated to an extended montage before each couples’ first routine; wherein we review their journey to the Finals. Kelly’s memory does not offer much insight – apparently she felt joyful when she did well, and felt really terrible when she messed up. The video does better to remind us just how she has matured. Carrie Ann drops in on rehearsal to teach Kelly how to appear hot-and-bothered in Louis’s arms for the Tango. And I would happily make a joke about that, but it sure seems to have been the secret to taking Kelly to the next level. This Argentine Tango is her sharpest, sexiest, most overpowering dance of the season by any rational measure. She and Louis merge in performance to a greater degree than ever before. That newfound speed she teased us with last week has her feet cracking like whips; and she is doing things without even looking like she’s thinking about them that would have made her quit the contest two months ago rather than attempt. At least one of Mýa’s challengers has just declared that this contest isn’t over.

Freestyle – 24/30

Kelly’s freestyle rehearsal really encapsulates her season – she’s injured, she’s unsure, she has body issues, she’s teasing Louis; then, gradually, she trusts him and she tries. She’s right to mock Louis’s street dancing, though – I have seen it many times and he always looks like a goober. Doing a disco queen boogie to “I Will Survive” is just as much a microcosm – there are mistakes, and laughs, and moments of glorious confidence and fun. You can actually see a wordless conversation happening between her and Louis as they stumble, shake it off, and decide together to grin their way through it. That makes it feel alive and immediate. It’s far from perfect, and yet it’s triumphant because she’s not apologizing or beating herself up. Kelly of Week One never knew she could be this bold.

MÝA/DMITRY CHAPLIN – Paso Doble – 30/30

Mýa’s look-back montage focuses heavily on her contentious encounters with Len at scoring time. With hindsight, it’s clear that a good share of the tough love was intended for Dmitry, so he would lay off the gimmicks and really use Mýa’s incredible assets properly. Mýa responded noticeably better to the nearly-abusive underscoring than the pro. When Len enters the studio for pointers, he immediately assumes the role of demanding teacher, and Mýa likes it like catnip. If she has any weakness, it’s that no one’s sure what her upper limit is in terms of power and out-and-out ferocity. This paso doble is absolutely designed to test that, and you can see her reaching for it. She has to make up some of the muscle gap with attitude and swagger; but she has plenty of that. Impressive, and admirable considering how far afield it is from her more-familiar routines. The audience is happily on their feet again. Looking like there’s going to be a lot of that going around. And the judges bring out the straight 10’s – even Mýa looks surprised by that.

Freestyle – 27/30

You can see Mýa’s eyes gleam as she talks about throwing all pretense of safety out the window with her freestyle. She wants to “make history”. Dmitry tries to speak softly through his terror and recommends something conventional. In the end, she defers to his choice, and then commits to pushing for the most challenging choreography available within it. That they did all this calmly sitting on the floor illustrates what has made them different from the other couples throughout. He creates a jive/jitterbug hybrid to “You Can’t Stop the Beat” from Hairspray; and it’s remarkable how far away this is from what Mýa does best. We live for those tight flicks and those lusciously-disciplined limbs; as energetically and perfectly as she bops and grins, it just doesn’t rouse like we know she can, like we know she SHOULD in her freestyle. I’m typing this before the judges say what they think – I think Dmitry let her down again, and she should have done things her way. They actually agree with me, and deal out the grumpiest set of straight 9’s you ever saw.

DONNY OSMOND/KYM JOHNSON – Cha-cha-cha – 27/30

Donny’s survival instinct took over the moment he couldn’t beat the judges with personality in Week One. Even now, as he watches his old performances, he’s criticizing the technique. His determination to fight against his age and bad posture habits probably contributed a lot to the loyalty of his fan base – they could see him working beyond the threshold to earn their esteem. Bruno is the chosen guest tutor for the week, and you have to think some executive in the bowels of ABC is hoping to spin their unexpected goof-off chemistry into a sitcom called “The Mormon and the Queen” or something. Donny’s cha-cha isn’t deliriously fast, nor complex, but after an awkward start it is as smooth as the disco beat under it. Donny is doing his best sly strut and having fun at it – if he missed a move here or there, he’s not going to tell you about it right now. It’s a really inviting dance, working the crowd like’s always known to, but with impeccable posture and musicality now to round it out. Carrie Ann’s bringing the flirty giggle back! And for Donny, of all people. Has she only just noticed that he’s been improving his hips for weeks?

Freestyle – 30/30

Now when Donny and Kym say they’re doing Broadway, I consider it the right call. It’s the word that unifies all Donny’s best qualities and gives him the strongest chance to do something memorable. He and Kym have a different, but no less effective, relationship than Mýa and Dmitry; Donny is far more deferential, but also wears his passion on his sleeve, which Kym knows what to do with. You can immediately see the difference in excitement between his routine and Mýa’s – he is such a natural for tux and tails, and he shows so much humor and savoir faire as he and Kym high-step their way through “Back in Business”, one of Stephen Sondheim’s Dick Tracy tunes. This brings him full circle – in Week One he had showmanship cold, but had no technique. Now he is the fully-formed dancer version of himself, and just made his best argument for an upset. The first non-Mýa 30 score of the season won’t hurt either.

Megamix Challenge – All Contenders – Viennese Waltz, Samba, and Jive

Humphrey Bogart once said about the Oscars “The only way to find the best actor would be to let everybody play Hamlet and let the best man win.” This didn’t stop him from accepting the Oscar he won; but it is a surprise that it has taken this long for the DWTS producers to pit the contenders against one another with identical choreography. Season 2 and 3 pro Nick Kosovich has the task of crafting a routine that will pass through three different styles; the rehearsal footage focuses primarily on Kelly freaking out and feeling unworthy compared with Mýa, and Donny feeling uncomfortably old. Even the segment editors assume there will be no drama with Mýa.

The dance segments are so brief; for a non-professional eye, it is difficult to focus long enough on any one couple to learn anything useful. Mýa is as polished and on-the-beat as ever, but doesn’t grab the spotlight – Donny and Kym have the benefit of the center floor position and the bright-red outfits to draw the eye; plus he is doing the man’s half of the choreography, so it’s not even a complete side-by-side comparison. He presents the most personality, while Kelly just looks discombobulated after her elegant share of the waltz. Conceptually there’s promise to this idea (much in the way they had the finalists design different routines for an identical song back in Season Three), but in this version, for voters I fear this will simply serve to reinforce already-held opinions.

3rd Place, 26 points: Kelly/Louis (total 76/90)
2nd Place, 28 points: Donny/Kym (total 85/90)
1st Place, 30 points: Mýa/Dmitry (total 87/90)

Next up: The Grand Finale!

The narration at the top of the broadcast describes all four Dancing With the Stars semi-finalists as worthy of the Finals. It’s true that they all have Finals-worthy performances in them – but so did Aaron. And this is hardly unprecedented, as anyone who watched Lil’ Kim get thrown over so Ty could have a semi-finals slot knows. I remain of the opinion that this competition boils down to Mýa and a bunch of would-be runners-up; and most of what happens in this final Elimination Night serves to underline that.

Her salsa with Dmitry is the judges’ choice for the reprise – but given that it’s only the second perfect-30 routine of the season, this is no surprise. I have criticized the judges for their late sour streak, but I admit there’s some counter satisfaction to the fact that 30s aren’t just dropping from the ceiling anymore.

During the review of the last night’s performance, Donny’s post-Tango interview shows that he continues to take his mistake-laden routine REALLY personally. Even the producers are working overtime at this point to absolve him of blame, repeatedly zooming in to show them moment Kym’s dress unraveled at the bottom, tangling their feet. Every time he is near a microphone, Donny is waving his arms and demanding another acknowledgment of his failure, so he can show his ability to laugh at it – it’s not attractive.

We have a quick montage that boils down to celebs admiring each other, and then we’re into a dance number from the upcoming movie Nine (not the stichpunk animated feature from a couple of months ago, a musical from Chicago director Rob Marshall). It stars a man with Daniel Day-Lewis look-a-like hair and dancers who MAY OR MAY NOT BE in the movie! It’s a pretty sultry and vivacious routine that really fills up the floor, but it sure isn’t going to give you Idea One what the movie is about. In an amazingly fortunate coincidence, the first commercial immediately after is a long trailer for the movie.

Alicia Keys returns to the ballroom for the television debut of her new single “Try Sleeping With a Broken Heart”. It mingles and ache and uplift in that way really good R&B still can, and I do still appreciate a young performer who sings live. But I admit that during part of her performance, I was pondering just how the hell they cleared out all the set dressing from the Nine dance, and wheeled Alicia’s not-exactly-light piano onto the ballroom floor, in the time of just one commercial break? I’ve had to move heavy things on a time limit before – it is not easy. But I have long said that the production/spectacle elements of the live broadcast are part of why I enjoy the show so much – they work hard and they enjoy letting as have a peek at that hard work.

And because they believe the celebs are still getting way too much downtime, they push them into starring in a quicky faux-music video to the classic “Under Pressure”. Kelly Osbourne’s dancing is uncannily Cyndi Lauper-esque, which makes you think her choice of a Lauper number for the Knockout Dance indicates a more personal connection with the 80’s icon. At the end of the video, Tom says what we’re all thinking: “Apparently pressure doesn’t improve lip-synching skills.”

Finally we’re making announcements. And really? We’re still doing the “still in jeopardy” bit now? Mýa is the first celeb cleared for the Finals, and that surprises no one. Probably. Then again, I’ve been in movies where audience members are so shocked that those people on that screen are talking and doing things that they have to spend the whole movie describing it loudly to their neighbor.

Leona Lewis is musical guest number two, and performs her new single “Happy”. It’s designed as a full-lunged modern soul anthem, with a solid, insistent beat under it that really helps that ambition. Lewis even takes a brief trip to the Mariah Carey octave, but doesn’t stay long.

In the next segment of results, Donny and Kym are declared saved. Donny looks genuinely shocked. And over on the other side of the stage, Kelly looks like she knows the badness of this news and is trying to stop her whole body from converting spontaneously from solid to liquid.

The third, count ‘em, THIRD musical guests are Robin and Barry Gibb, the still-living The Bee Gees. The night before, Tom was introducing them by their individual names and describing them as “of the Bee Gees”. Tonight they are using the full band name with no qualifiers; did they confirm legal permission to do so? Regardless, they look in their aged versions like the curators of a sketchy European art gallery, and Barry seems to do little but wiggle between choruses. The biggest treat for me was the moment they cut to Ozzy Osbourne in the front row. I really wanted to see if he boogied to the Bee Gees. I wanted to hear him talk about the Bee Gees. Really, I was imagining a lot of preferred alternatives to this creakily-sung revival.

The pros did dance in this performance, and featured the return of last season’s third-place finisher Melissa Rycroft. She’s retained a lot of charisma and athleticism she sculpted into ballroom form, and clearly enjoys being here and in the rehearsal studios again. I earnestly believe that most of the ex-competitors spied in the audience are not there by dictate, or just to show they can score tickets, but because they genuinely want a taste of being here again.

Then there’s a too-short montage on the process of putting together the pro dances. I think there are so many untold stories here – gathering that many preening personalities, all of them top-notch dancer/choreographers known for their forceful opinions, into a room with too little time to come up with something fresh every week, has to produce some delicious spasms of ego; and damn it, I want to see that.

Even with three musical guests, the producers still spend a lot of time playing games with the commercial breaks to milk the suspense. Fake-outs like that are the stuff of lesser shows. But finally, they can hold off no longer, and drop the real surprise news – Joanna and Derek are out. In spite of the second best judges’ scores, voter connection really was her downfall. She was practically an unknown at the start, especially compared with the other semi-finalists; that gave her a lot of ground to make up. I think that lack of the indefinable “it” was what stopped her here – as beautiful as she was, and as technically capable, she didn’t have that rare ability to command our attention on the floor. Instead of the rushed “last dance” that never amounts to much, the producers generously allow them to reprise their Viennese Waltz – which gets lovelier knowing it’s their farewell.

This means Kelly Osbourne is headed to the Finals. I would not have laid money on that. And from the look on Kelly’s face; I don’t think she would have either. So our finalists are Mýa, Donny, and Kelly – two celebs who compulsively announce to everyone that they’re screw-ups who aren’t worthy, and one who dances like she is worthy. I hate to ruin the suspense for you, but it would take a disaster to change this outcome.

Next Week: THE! FINALS! LIIIIIIIIIIVE!

As I exhaled and smiled when Donny Osmond and his partner Kym were declared the winners of the Dancing With The Stars competition on ABC last night, I really didn’t get downright emotional until I saw what Donny did next. He went to the audience and grabbed his wife Debbie and carried her out to the dance floor to join them. Their children followed shortly after. I have always been smitten with Donny since we were young, but this just showed me what truly great guys are like.

Kym Johnson and Donny Osmond

Congrats Donny…you are one classy guy!