Dear Robert Plant,

Out of respect for your legendary rock status, we hereby apologize for making you think this video was a good idea.

Sincerely,

The 1980s.

Probably about as much as Snoopy and Thanksgiving.

I must say though, I am thoroughly enjoying this new tradition of Star Trek and pumpkin pie on Turkey Day.

When I was a kid, I used to love for Thanksgiving and Christmas to come around so I could sit in front of my 16″ black and white TV (without cable) and watch A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving. I loved the airing of this program because I knew after that it was a short countdown to Christmas, which meant Christmas trees, candy canes, sugar cookies, and PRESENTS!

I used to keep time around Christmas using the network television shows. Charlie Brown was the first to arrive at Thanksgiving, after that came  Frosty, Rudolph, and the Grinch. I spent many an hour in front of the television wrapped in my snuggie drinking hot chocolate watching my shows.

(For the overseas folks who may not have access to the yearly programs, here are some links where you can see them online!)

1. It’s a Wonderful Life (click to watch)

2. A Charlie Brown Christmas (click to watch)

3. Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer (click to watch)

4. How the Grinch Stole Christmas (click to watch)

5. Santa Claus is Coming to Town (click to watch)

6. Frosty the Snowman (click to watch)

Typically Frosty or Rudolph were the last to air, and once they showed then I knew Christmas was within days! 

To this day, all of those shows remind me of my childhood in front of that wee-tv and I find myself smiling.

Two years ago my family began a new tradition. On Christmas night, after all of the presents have been opened, the dogs put to bed, and the food resting-not-so-comfortably in our stuffed tummies, we watch A Christmas Story.

Typically we will sit giggling raucously to quotes such as:

“I double-dog dare you!”

“You’ll shoot your eye out!”

“Fra-gee-lay”

“I want an Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle!”

Last year John drove over five-and-a-half hours to join us for the movie. He laughed as hard as we did so I knew he’d fit in great with the family.

And this year, John has brought us Star Trek.

Last Thanksgiving, I did not even know John yet. This Thanksgiving, he has become a part of setting new traditions in the family…well, maybe. 

So what do Star Trek (2009 of course) and Thanksgiving have in common?

Nothing really, other than the potential of a new family tradition – thanks to my Gumpee.

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

One of the best 80’s songs, one of the best ever. Many thanks to Dieter for his wonderful songs and to Thomas for his great voice. many thanks for the memories. Long live Modern Talking !!!!

Modern Talking – You’re My Heart, You’re My Soul

Best 80s TV Shows

• Magnum PI
• Miami Vice
• Three’s Company
• Remington Steele
• The A-Team
• Knight Rider
• CHiPs
• Cheers
• MASH
• The Cosby Show
• Dallas
• Taxi
• The Dukes of Hazard
• The Jeffersons
• Happy Days

or: I’ll trade you civil liberties circa 1980, for the right to beat your wife circa 1920

or: If Glenn Beck were a decade, which one would he be?

For almost a year now, and even further back possibly, I have been fascinated with politics and punditry. I have become a self-proclaimed politico and I follow politics and media pretty closely, as closely as my tenuous hold on sanity will allow. In following politics my liberal mind has always been perplexed by the conservative party line of ‘returning to traditional American values’ and trying to recapture the ‘lost spirit of what it is to be an American’. In recent months it as been the loud ram’s horn call of Glenn Beck, and his ever growing audacity matched only by his ever growing audience, that has caused me to pontificate further on this subject. For the past few weeks this idea of lost values and traditional American fundamentals has led me to research where we might have gone wrong. Is there a specific time and place, a particular era that the GOP and other right-leaning hard-liners would want us to return to? If I can put my finger on the ethos that these guiding principles existed in, can we get back there? I delve in to this quagmire of American history to try and find “Glenn’s America”, so that he and others can stop preaching in general broad strokes and say, “we need to get back to what we believed in 19XX (or 18XX as it may be).”

When examining the general party ideas of what I understand to be the GOP’s fundamental idealogical structure I take my understanding from some 25 years on this planet, though you can’t count the first 16. I think that until you turn 17 and start trying to find yourself and begin to shape your views and identity in preparation for voting and contributing to society you are more of a blank slate in terms of personal free thought; up until this point you do not question a source but only try to fit in to the general parameters of ‘normal’ life as to not rock the boat and interfere with the indoctrination that American public schools instill in our youth. My true views have been shaped in my most recent years and as such I have adopted a view of the world quite different from my parents’, a direct result of informing myself for the first time in my life. In my home growing up as a small boy liberal leaders and democratic ideals warranted venom and crass, lewd criticism. The views I set forth will be of my own creation, independent of those I was raised on, either despite or in spite of them, I cannot tell. A crazy person isn’t crazy if he knows he’s crazy. Indeed.

The GOP seems to feel that gays should not marry, and are sinful. This makes no sense to me as sinful is a religious idea, not a political one; though it seems one position is quite often the result of the other. Gun rights should be protected at all costs to personal safety and public responsibility. Abortion is a no-no, ‘nuff said. They want smaller government, tax cuts, reform to let states decide things, though not gay marriage rights or any of the other items I just mentioned. They are for fiscal responsibility. GOP feels that a free market should regulate itself, again smaller government. They claim to fight for the middle class but public programs and universal anything is bad, that’s more government. They hate the environment as far as I can tell. Campaign finance reform (yeah right), education in America (no child left behind has gone so well after all). Prayer in school is ok, capital punishment and the death penalty are pretty much thumbs up, and the Ten Commandments should be at the steps of a courthouse flying the confederate flag. I am pretty close on this, right? So, basically it is a small government that has an abridged copy of the constitution, a cliff’s notes of the Bill of Rights, and a bible as it’s guiding principles. Hmmm, ok.

So, in American history, where can we find this utopia we strive for every day? This shangri-la we lost so long ago would obviously be the one saving grace for this country of godless sodomites. If we could only return to this point in time then everything would be fine. As far as I can tell it is the GOP that can save us if you believe the rhetoric. The liberals and the liberal media have scattered us across the nation and we are divided along partisan lines and are all doomed unless we jump on the Republican band wagon like some lifeboat after the Titanic sank. This is what self proclaimed “libertarian” Glenn Beck would like you to believe. I will give him credit for criticizing the government as a whole, even in the Bush days, though not in such inflammatory terms, but in reality he is like a Liber-publican. So, let’s take a step, Glenn, in to the way back machine and start a search for the time in American history you would like us to return to, as well as all of the Republican nay-sayers.

I want to start by saying that I am skipping the nineties completely being that he wasn’t happy with Clinton either, and it is far too close to the 21st century and the liberal progress this country has made; there is no way anyone wants to get back to how we were in the nineties, not even me and I loved my teen years in the nineties. And I am going to come back to the eighties later, they were too soon as well, but I will look at them briefly. We are sending our way back machine to a time when I think this country went bat-shit crazy and we were in maybe the most turmoil as a nation than anyone today can recall. I want to start out in the era that good old Glenn was born in, and that many of our current figure heads today, that make our decisions, can remember very ‘fondly’…the sixties.

Well I start here, in this decade of utter unrest by trying to illustrate that this can’t possibly be the America Glenn wants back. This cannot be the period in American history we want to recapture. This was a time that the late Strom Thurman must have hated with more zeal than any other period in history. It is hard to decide where to start. The sixties started out innocent enough, Kennedy beat Nixon and became the President, what followed was the Bay of Pigs incident, rumors about Marilyn, the meager beginning of Vietnam, the cuban missile crisis, then the man is assassinated. Further Vietnam BS, Malcolm X is killed, the Compton Cafeteria Riots in San Fran, then Nixon and all his Vietnam BS and his ‘secret plan to end the war’, the massive inflation crisis, MLK Jr. is killed, Bobby Kennedy is killed, the Stonewall riots of ’69, oh and a little thing who was named Manson did some killing. Great decade.

The sixties were a time of massive riots in the black and gay communities. Civil rights on all fronts tore the fabric of this country apart from women liberation, blacks, gays, even the Chicano revolution in this country. Outside of that was the acid wave of the sixties, a complete change in television, film, art, and especially music. The counterculture as it came to be known galvanized this country after the death of JFK, I think. The nice, homely manners of the 50’s were gone in a big way and now came very free thinkers, revolutionaries, protests exploded, demonstrations, inflation choked the middle class as they tried to compete with the changes in the landscape. The sixties were an ugly, hate-filled time, the emerging civil rights movement after the death of JFK was really the catalyst for it all. There is no way we want to return to the sixties as a country. America was in a violent turmoil and unsure of it’s identity and where the road we were on was going to lead us and people were strung out or scared for their lives, or both. I don’t think Glenn wants that back, so let’s move on.

How about we take a step forward and find Glenn in the seventies as a small boy, maybe these are the innocent and moral times he wants back…but I doubt it. Well in the seventies music really got good including the first ‘rap’ song, movies got weird, TV got lewd, and the country just got fucked up worse. This country started watching shows like All In The Family and the Brady bunch, dealing with some of the issues of the day. Vietnam choked the first few years while a little thing called Watergate slipped by the news press during Nixon’s re-election campaign and then killed him by ’74. It was the most embarrassing and shocking scandal in American political history, which in my opinion was the death of politics. I think that Nixon and his escalation of the doomed Vietnam war and his scandal killed the American political system. Outside of the US revolution was abundant across the world. Woodstock was a shining beacon of what drugs and music and mud can do for young people, a complete change from how we started the decade on the campus of Kent State where the National Guard gunned down peaceful protestors of the war on a college campus; unthinkable today, one would hope. The draft was the height of outrage, an unbelievable moment when Ali fought the draft and Elvis went in. Protest and anti-war sentiment was as widespread in this country as pant legs were flared. The Cold War ramped up a bit and this country got really scared, really fast. Our involvement in a few revolutions and military coupes as well as an assassination or two was a continuation of poor foreign affairs decisions. The middle east started down the road to where we are today with Israel, Egypt, Syria, the Soviet Union, and Afghanistan, all starting to kick each others asses.

The seventies brought women’s rights to the forefront as the sixties had civil rights for minorities eclipsing women’s rights to some extent. Vietnam ended finally, well our involvement, leaving the North to just wait for us to leave and drop Saigon to it’s knees and claim the country unified again. A sad end to a war we should have not been in and an end that was mostly our fault. Oh and lest I forget the massive recession we were in mixed with oil crises a couple of times resulting in rationing and further middle class stresses that included a very high unemployment rate. Then of course there was Jonestown, about 900 dead there. Idi Amin started his tyrannical, violent rule of Uganda as well. Is this the era we should return to? Hatred, war, violence, and tragedy pock marked this era. The seventies hold within their years scandal, racism, and fear-mongering, of the most epic scale one can imagine. There is no way we want to return to the moral or political views of this era. The seventies were the time for change for sure, but it came at great expense on the heels of a decade of radical change and upheaval. The 70’s continued the massive crime rate spikes that the sixties brought and the country still sat on the edge of it’s seat every day as nothing seemed to get better. Surely we don’t want the seventies back.

Ok, the eighties might be better, the days of Reagan and Bush, this might be the most likely time we want to return to. The eighties would be the most formidable years of Beck’s life; the decade of excess. The eighties brought the yuppie, and with it, all the coke, parties, and BMW’s we could handle. We saw great multinational growth and wall street was glamorous, they were kings then, still total scum, but they had better PR people then. Of course Reagan declared a War on Drugs, the Cold War raged to a massive scale. Sure, communism fell apart as did the Berlin Wall, but we saw the further mishandling of the middle east that is the source of our problems and involvement there today, can’t argue with that. Reagan put a major black eye on his presidency with the discovery of the Iran-Contra debacle that Oliver North was the mastermind behind. This country saw massive economic growth against the backdrop of very complicated and protracted battles all over the world including Asia, the middle east, central and south america, and ever Ireland with ‘the troubles’ brewing. (Only badass Irish would call a modern, religious civil war ‘the troubles’, an understatement to say the least)

The eighties, I think were a time of thinking that we could not be beaten, being the short attention span of Americans forgetting the seventies. We were coked out of our minds, living beyond our means, and we were kicking Commie ass. But the eighties, world wide, were complicated, painful growth, some democratic, but on the whole we saw massive famine and destruction abroad as the industrialized countries were making head way. The middle class of nations was being evaporated as the gap between rich and poor nations grew drastically. Domestic issues were tough though, as it seemed we were trying to use our power for good as a people with things like LiveAid and becoming more aware of issues in Africa and other countries, the eighties saw the rise of the religious right. They really got fired up on the gay issue and the discovery of AIDS, ‘the gay plague’. This country grew in many way, a decent decade I guess, I don’t really remember much of it but it seemed like a lot of people were having a lot of fun, safer fun.

Glenn probably liked the eighties, he used to be a liberal and an alcoholic, he draws a fine parallel between the two in a Katie Couric interview you should look up on YouTube, and this might have been his favorite time. Old enough to enjoy and understand it, he probably had a great time. Conservatives in power, strides made internationally, excess and money everywhere. The eighties were a wild party time, a decade that seemed to be a release of the past twenty years of hard work, growing pains, and controversial conflict. The 60’s and 70’s were going to lead inevitably to a time when we finally just cut loose and took a deep breath after so much bloodshed, upheaval, and serious talk. It was the decade we all remembered fondly on VH1. Music was weird, movies were great, TV was filled with classics we all watched, and standup comedians were making it big; the country was having a good laugh, a bump, and some beer. Not too bad.

I discount the nineties entirely so let’s jump back to a more general era I don’t think we can reasonably go back to, the 50’s to the 30’s. This was another era of massive wars, depression, civil rights injustice, bigotry, no women’s liberation, industrialization, organized crime, et al. These were times when blacks were openly hung from gallows, women were expected to be barefoot and pregnant in front of the stove, except when they were making tanks for the troops overseas for next to nothing wages. A time where minorities were rightfully scared at night of police or white boys out for a joyride. The prohibition, crime in the streets, Bonnie and Clyde, the Tommy gun, the B.A.R., saloons, speakeasy’s, and rampant bank robberies and crooked cops on the beat. This was a different time for this country and I don’t think we can agree with many of the ideals that were held to in this time and apply it today, the role of women alone is too much inequality to bare, let alone the rest.

OK, let’s take a big jump to my favorite era, the old west. You know the times, I’m talking post manifest destiny, pre-FBI. A time of no gun laws, showdowns in the streets, legal prostitutes, and riding in to town on a horse. Tombstone, San Francisco, Indian and cowboys. A time where gold was rushing and crazy white drunks ran amok and contracted TB and polio. Yes, when there were still a few Indians around, you had ranchers with thousands of acres, cattle drives, train robberies, and the men of storied legend lived and died by Winchester, Colt, and Smith&Wesson. I like to think I lived in the times with a town sheriff, shitty beer, floozies, and general martial law over most of the country. A time where you could shoot a man in the street in broad daylight in front of 50 people, and they might actually clap and then go about their day. The good times.

I think this might not be far enough back though. When I hear Glenn speak, he talks about the founding father’s principles. The true foundation of the country as he sees it with the men who earned America through blood, sweat, and tears. Jefferson’s America. OK, well let’s first examine the fact that we are talking late 1700’s and early 1800’s. These are pre-electric, pre-phone times. We are talking Boston Tea Party, Paul Revere, plantations, etc. If this is the time Glenn thinks we need to get back to I want to highlight a couple of things. First off, slavery was alive and well…need I say more? Secondly, this country treated women like shit, there were no civil rights, and it was unindustrialized. This country was populated and run by rich, white land owners, and then there was everybody else. I don’t want anyone to romanticize this era. This country was created, founded, and declared on the bodies of millions of natives and the death and suffering of minority races of people removed from their homes and treated worse than dogs in the time period.

America has never been truly righteous. We revolted for selfish reasons, nothing simpler than that. We turned against the imperialism of the Queen and her rule and declared our independence; the worst “dear John” letter ever. Up to that point we had slaughtered, tricked, infected, raped, and pillaged our way to the Mississippi and thought very highly of white skin and could kill a black man for any reason at any time, or sell them, whatever struck our fancy. What I am about to say is going to piss off the right, but if I could meet George Washington I think I would take the opportunity to shake his hand and then slap the wooden teeth out of his head. These were racist white bigots with an knack for the written word and hard on for ‘freedom’ by their definition as it applied to them as an emerging nation of first class citizens at the top of the shit pile. All due respect, but their ideas and principles were fundamentally offensive and their beliefs of equality were for themselves and those they agreed with. How many minorities or women were running around enjoying their freedom of speech or right to bare arms…or even read? I rest my case.

So maybe Glenn does have a time in mind. Maybe he wants the scandalous, violent 70’s, or the civil unrest and inequality of the 60’s. The old west certainly had smaller/non-existent national government, and the 40’s sure were good times to be a gangster, Nixon would have done well, that’s for sure. The eighties surely had the best coke, and some unprecedented growth, outside of post-industrialized America (without all of these pesky labor laws we got). Maybe he wants the great depression era, maybe to live amongst the greatest generation, or rub elbows with white men who raped their slaves on their plantation as a matter of principle and patriotism. The history of America is short, embarrassing, and seemingly without a lesson learned throughout. Glenn, I dare you and your constituents to point out that shining beacon in American history that is so much better than now, ‘cause I must have missed it. All those moments have led up to now, and I’ll be damned if where we are isn’t a hell of a lot better than where we were; you can pry this progress from my cold dead hands, pal.

There were a lot of things wrong with the world back in the 70’s and 80’s…

Leisure wear

Spandex

Hair Metal

Disco

Polyester

Tight-rolled jeans

Z-Cavaricci

Mall Hair

Side Spikes

Mullets

Wine Coolers

Topsiders with no socks

Joanie Loves Chachi…

…I could go on for days…

But there was one offense greater than most.

They posed a question to us:

Why sizzle fat when you can Sizzlean?

I’ll tell you why. Because bacon is quite frankly, the best food ever.

Eating Sizzlean (or Facon, as I like to call it) is like eating a tofu burger and hoping it tastes like the real thing—just eat the damned burger, folks.

It’s like Beggin Strips for people.

And trust me…you should NEVER eat Beggin Strips…They (like Sizzlean) do not, I repeat, DO NOT taste like bacon.

Album Cover

Tegan and Sara

“Sainthood”

October 2009; Sire Records

By Emily J Ramey

By now you better know that the indie rock duo Tegan and Sara is comprised of Canadian identical twins Tegan and Sara Quin.  The eclectically charismatic pair of women has been gathering critical acclaim for their raw and distinctive power pop since the 2004 release of So Jealous and its single “Walking with a Ghost.”  However, it was 2007’s The Con and its singles “Back in Your Head” and “The Con” that led to T&S’ international renown and household name status.  Ring any bells?  Okay, fast forward nearly two years.

Now, with their six full length album Sainthood, Tegan and Sara are demonstrating their staying power in a rapid-moving industry as well as their ability to adapt and develop their music as the women themselves mature as songwriters, performers, and musical icons.

Sainthood is a badass girl rock album with strong, driving percussion, sharp, choppy vocals, and clever, buoyant lyrics.  Essentially, Tegan and Sara have recorded an assortment of syrupy love songs turned edgy eighties synth pop by the twins’ tight electronic instrumentation and tensely expressive, angular performance.

Sainthood’s track listing is well-balanced and robust.  A few of the can’t-miss songs are “Don’t Rush,” a grungy, distorted tune, simple and distinguishing with its pithy chorus: “One way or another/I’ll find my way to cover/I sing to find my other;” the album’s first single “Hell,” a catchy tour de force with quick wordplay and heavy, upbeat guitar contradicting its darker content; the silky and dynamic tune “The Cure” with its silvery harmonies, mellow flow, and sanguine lines like, “I know the world’s been mean to you/ I’ve got a cure; hold tight./I know the world’s not fair to you/I’ve got a cure for its crimes;” the post-punk-influenced “Northshore,” complete with rebel adolescent lyrics like, “Don’t save me, don’t save me, don’t save me,” and the repeated chorus line, “There’s something so sick about this/My misery’s so addictive;” and the effortless and unpretentious “Alligator,” a sunny tune of love lost.

Tegan and Sara use simplicity and hazy instrumentation to downplay their lyrics, which somehow works in reverse to highlight the duo’s unparalleled ability to speak to the heart of complications in love and other similar stories.  The Quin women are irresistible, but to be fair, they did warn us: “Watch/With a bit of friction/I’ll be under your clothes./With a bit of focus/I’ll be under your skin.”

410 words

Bene.
Potrei scrivere un lungo, noioso, menoso post su quanto sono stressato, su come gli esami siano uno dietro l’altro, su come sia vergognosamente di nuovo senza soldi, di quante volte al giorno la  mia testa mi suggerisce di farmi un tuffetto nel Ticino o di mettere le dita nella presa, potrei scrivere un prolisso e smielato e autocommiserativo articolo su tutto ciò, e lo farò. Solo, indirettamente, così fa più figo, e ve lo dimostrerò, state a vedè.

Mi sono un po’ fissato con questa canzone:

che non sembra poi essere così blue, così  triste come dice il titolo eh. Questo è l’unico motivo per cui ho intitolato in questo modo il post, perchè nonostante mi trovi ad essere molto impegnato e molto contro la mia volontà [n°1: riferimento allo studio massacrante] non mi sento affatto triste, anzi, penso di essere anche abbastanza sereno…oltretutto mi appresto a starmene solo soletto per una decina di giorni (il che significa FREEDOOOOM!) e soprattutto in un periodo morto, quindi penso che mi farò bastare quei pochi soldi che mi restano [n°2: riferimento alla mia povertà patologica] e mi godrò la situazione, senza seccature nè sguardi voluttuosi verso le prese di corrente o i ponti sul Ticino [e n°3: riferimento agli istinti suicidi], semplicemente nell’ozio! Dopotutto l’umore umano è qualcosa di strano: fino a ieri ero infuriato e very very blue, ma mi è bastata una notte di sonno per lavare via qualsiasi orrida ombra dalla mia mente, ed eccomi qui fresco come una rosa di campo in un frizzante mattino di primavera [prego notare la maestria nell'assemblaggio lessicale]!

Ed eccovi propinato un discorsino sulla mia disastrosa situazione ma senza la componente piagnona e deprimente che avrebbe di sicuro ammazzato i toni! Adesso, col sorriso sulle labbra e l’allegria stillante da tutti i miei pori, aprirò il libro di fisica e comincerò a solfeggiare formule!

(n.b: avrò sicuramente scritto questo post sotto l’effetto di qualche stupefacente che, evidentemente, deve avermi somministrato ieri notte Tamura Kafka a mia insaputa.)

Sympa la question (suggestion) non ? Elle est posée depuis les années 80 par Joan Jett dans cette vidéo que je viens de remonter d’une playlist où je l’avais un peu laissée dormir.

Et pendant que j’y suis, ce serait quand même dommage de faire l’économie du cultissime I Love Rock’n’ Roll… Donc une version avec des images cracras d’époque et une plus récente. Sans même avoir à “Put another dam in the jukebox babe”

Pour l’anecdote : j’ai encore le 45 tours acheté à l’époque. Et ce morceau servit de générique d’ouverture à une trop éphémère émission de Philippe Manoeuvre sur France Inter qui s’appelait – je crois me souvenir – “Je fais du rock”, où défilait la crème de la scène hexagonale d’alors, entre l’écoute des nouveautés d’outre-Manche ou d’outre-Atlantique fort éloignées d’une soupe mainstream montante.

I used to think that I hated Drew Barrymore because of Charlie’s Angels,  her stupid palsy face, and for doing stuff like this:

I still kind of hate her, but after having a recent discussion with my friends, I’ve come to the startling realization that I may like Drew Barrymore. I know, it makes me cringe too, but let me explain:

1. I loved “Ever After.” It’s a beautiful dream-like movie that I used to watch over and over when I was younger.
2. I may be the only person in world who actually watched, let alone liked the movie “Never Been Kissed.”
3. I absolutely love “The Wedding Singer.” It is one of my favorite pseudo ’80s movies of all time. It’s one of those movies that, if it’s on, I’ll drop everything to watch.
4. “Donnie Darko”
5. “Whip It” was actually not that bad either. If you can get over the awfulness of Ellen Page (which some people can’t) it’s worth it. Maybe I just liked it because of the roller derby factor, who knows?

In any account, I felt it was necessary to share my feelings on the subject.

Here are the top-30 movies from 1980-1989. This list was harder, but I think I finally got it right. You can always count on my movie recommendations.

1. Amadeus (1984) Director: Milos Forman
2. Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981) Director: Steven Spielberg
3. Raging Bull (1980) Director: Martin Scorsese
4. The Shining (1980) Director: Stanley Kubrick
5. Terms of Endearment (1983) Director: James L. Brooks
6. E.T. The Extra Terrestrial (1982) Director: Steven Spielberg
7. Cinema Paradiso (1988) Director: Giuseppe Tornatore
8. Salvador (1986) Director: Oliver Stone
9. Full Metal Jacket (1987) Director: Stanley Kubrick
10. National Lampoon’s Vacation (1983) Director: Harold Ramis
11. A Fish Called Wanda (1988) Director: Charles Crichton
12. Die Hard (1988) Director: John McTiernan
13. Chariots of Fire (1981) Director: Hugh Hudson
14. Once Upon a Time in America (1984) Director: Sergio Leone
15. Das Boot (1981) Director: Wolfgang Peterson
16. This Is Spinal Tap (1984) Director: Rob Reiner
17. The Right Stuff (1983) Director: Philip Kaufman
18. Fitzcarraldo (1982) Director: Werner Herzog
19. Scarface (1983) Director: Brian De Palma
20. Crimes and Misdemeanors (1989) Director: Woody Allen
21. Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (1984) Director: Steven Spielberg
22. Ghostbusters (1984) Director: Ivan Reitman
23. When Harry Met Sally (1989) Director: Rob Reiner
24. The Big Chill (1983) Director: Lawrence Kasdan
25. Back to the Future (1985) Director: Robert Zemeckis
26. Fatal Attraction (1987) Director: Adrian Lyne
27. Stand By Me (1986) Director: Rob Reiner
28. Field of Dreams (1989) Director: Phil Alden Robinson
29. Rain Man (1988) Director: Barry Levinson
30. Fast Times at Ridgemont High (1982) Director: Amy Heckerling

THE TRAILERS FOR THE TOP 3 BEST MOVIES OF 1980-1989

• This was a huge hit back in the late 80’s, recognized as the definitive work on the subjective nature of ugliness. As the 90’s progressed, the true profundity of the lyric came to be popularly understood and assimilated, culminating in mass acceptance of the fact that we are all, at the end of the day, ugly swine.

  On a fateful Friday in June of 1997, after legislation was unanimously passed in Dáil and Seanad Éireann, a referendum changed Bunreacht Na hÉireann and banned the judging of by appearances forever.

  While initially this may have seemed like a marvellous advance for society, unfortunately it backfired by giving rise to an immense and unforeseen arrogance that swept unforbearing across the country. Many ugly swine began to appear in the national media, they obtained work as important public figures such as doctors, dentists and bank managers. Being an ugly swine came to be considered healthy as they obtained positions in important state departments and ultimately as leader of the aforementioned Dáil Éireann.

  As the stricken country slowly awakens from this nightmare, some may look to the past and blame this song. However, it should be noted that the simultaneous introduction of mobile telephony meant that by the year 2000 there was no longer any need anyway for the ugly swine to sit at home by the phone.
  In the authors opinion this was also a major contributing factor to social change as it became acceptable to sit in transited places, bars, cafés, or indeed outside in parks, with a telephone in full public view, – as if to say. “He’s about to call… he’s about to call….”

  The Song that started it all
  Bull – Ugly Swine

  Disclaimer: Certain happenings mentioned in this review article may or may not have taken place in your own personal version of reality.

In case you didn’t notice yet: the Eighties are well and truly back in vogue. Although it seems that these days it’s all about wearing bad clothes (including leg-warmers), white cars and soulless synth-laden pop songs, rather than making strike threats and recession blues more bearable by drawing on escapist themes inspired post-punk. But anyway – to cut a long introduction short – last Saturday I saw Editors surfing on the decade’s best musical aspects in what must have been one of their biggest club shows up until now. While they may not like the persistent Joy Division comparisons, and even if they’re undoubtedly influenced by them, Editors are definitely no copycats. Their talent lies in building euphoric anthems combined with the introspective themes of isolation and despair that were first dwelt on by their peers over twenty years ago. And if their older songs were all about the nervous tension and jagged guitars, their newer efforts seem much more measured and deliberate. Maybe that’s why I didn’t like them like I used to do before. Actually, in contrary to what most critics have written, I really did see better Editors shows than the one last Saturday. Nevertheless I predict the band will be a massive hit on the festival circuit next year.

On the other hand Moby, king of Belgian festivals 2009, helped us remember what late ‘80s warehouse dance parties looked like. With significant assistance from Joy Malcom and Kelli Scarr, he surveyed his almost 20-year career for something more than two hours. Essentially he played the same set as earlier this year: (1) soundtracky pieces that blended piano motifs, synth whooshes and disco pulses, (2) techno thumpers that contrasted full-throated vocals with house beats, and (3) mid-tempo dance-punk anthems. Chatty as always the maker of dance-club bangers came up with some good advice too – “if you decide to take acid tonight, make sure you are with a friend” – forgetting that this performance was actually a concert and not a rave. But if the name is Richard Melville Hall, all is forgiven.

Speaking of forgive and forget… Last week I promised a full report on how to deal with glare-aholics. But to be honest: I actually didn’t happen to be someone’s eye pudding this week. I guess there’s really no need for having all this paranoid thoughts since peepers most likely left their book/paper at home, are cruising without their conversational partner(s) or are forgetting that they should sleep instead of stare. So let all of this be a reminder that classic pearls of wisdom from our moms still do apply in modern day mass transit.

When I come to think of it, there’s no greater source of wisdom than one’s own mother. We might not always love them when commenting our hair, clothes or lifestyle (let alone express our love towards them); we do know that in most cases they’re right. It’s on this behalf that I probably have the coolest mother walking around on this planet. For instance I still remember vividly her reaction when I got home with my tragus pierced. And after that when I came home with my first tattoo, stating she kind of liked it. So it’s very normal that I’m curious of what her reaction will be when she sees my new tattoo later on this evening – probably “when will you stop?” (while looking at my father). And since I do love her so much I will answer this question properly with “the 2^nd of December”.

At last and for those who always were convinced that being from London and writing epic folk songs wasn’t a great match, I have this. Okay, it doesn’t sound too dissimilar from other bands blagging around their way with a guitar and a keyboard in the indie circuit, but in fact these boys choose to equip themselves in a more original way. Albeit with a banjo, a double bass and an odd moustache. Convince yourself: Mumford & Sons – Little Lion Man.

Bye-

ALMODÓVAR IN THE EIGHTIES
Thursday, November 19 & Friday, November 20
King Juan Carlos I of Spain Center / New York University

http://almodovarfilmfestnyu.wordpress.com/

Gotta make a move
Got everything to gain
And nothing to lose

Kylie Minogue – Nothing To Lose

The 80s Christmas gifts that never appeared

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Josh
Wednesday
11:36 am <!–TEMPORARILY DISABLED THE DIGG WIDGET

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For me, the 80s were spent in a most Spielbergian fashion: middle class split-level home in a rolling suburb. Weekends were spent at the mall and summer nights were spent playing flashlight tag throughout the neighborhood.

In the fall, the giant JC Penney and Sears catalogues would arrive, and I’d instantly flump them over to the back pages where the toys awaited my approval. I’d pore over those dozen pages so carefully that the spine was permanently bent to visions of Transformers and Lego sets.

And, while I was usually able to make a pretty respectable haul for a pre-teen, some of the coolest gifts consistently evaded my grasp. Those toys haunt me today, and my heart still goes pitter-patter when I run across them online.

Here are my most desired gifts I didn’t get, arranged by year, for your approval. What big game alluded your hunting skills? Be sure to comment below….

1980: Big Trak

Why I had to have it: Big Trak was a programmable tank that worked like a semiautonomous remote-controlled car. Kids could enter up to 15 commands (go forward, pause, turn X degrees, etc.), and Big Trak would trundle off on its goal to scare the crap out of the family cat.

Why I can only assume Santa couldn’t seal the deal: The big man thought I was maybe a touch too young for a complex microproccesor toy like Big Trak, despite my protestations to my parents that my older cousin had one, and I totally wouldn’t break it.

1981: US1 Highway Trucking Race Track

Why I had to have it: The US1 Highway Trucking Race Track compares to other slot car sets like Power Wheels compared to pedal cars. US1 was a true H-O scale slot track that allowed for semis, construction sites, loading and unloading.

Hell, just watch the video — it makes my timbers shiver even today.

What I can only assume Santa couldn’t seal the deal: I had a lot of slot car track, and if you’ve ever owned slot car track, you can definitely taste the disappointment. Cars would get jammed on the track, their little motor buzzing… you’d goose the engine, and watch as the car sailed off the track into cracked oblivion.

1982: Colecovision

You think I’m kidding? Click on this side by side comparison!

Why I had to have it: Sometime around 1981, my parents got an Intellivision, forever spawning my track record of picking the wrong gaming console for every generation since. Don’t get me wrong — I had a great time with Space Armada, Nova Blast and the rest of the crew, but it lacked the infinite game library of the Atari 2600, and forever seemed as crude as a baby’s toy after the Colecovision came out. The graphics on the Colecovision seemed positively photorealistic at the time, and home versions of arcade games were vibrant.

Why I can only assume Santa couldn’t seal the deal: “Ho, ho, ho. You only get one console every generation, kid, and you chose poorly. Greed’s a bitch. Also, Merry Christmas.”

1983: Domino Rally

Why I had to have it: For some reason, the early 80s featured an elaborate domino craze. Domino Rally was one of a few big-league domino sets that allowed kids to build their own gigantic domino runs without the need for those pesky, full-sized dominos. The possibilities of spending hours carefully arraying them on the kitchen floor were endless.

Why I can only assume Santa couldn’t seal the deal: Santa likely received a last minute urgent plea from my father, who didn’t want to spend his entire Christmas day “setting up &$*#ing dominos that accidentally get knocked down every 5 minutes.”

1984: Power Wheels

Why I had to have it: What child can resist the allure of his or her own transportation? This, my friends, was my generation’s Red Ryder airgun. To get one of these under the tree meant you’d officially arrived. No hill would be too steep for my wiry physique to climb with the aid of battery-powered magic. Once I had my own powered vehicle, I mused, I could go anywhere.

Why I can only assume Santa couldn’t seal the deal: Once he had his own powered vehicle, they mused, he could go anywhere.

1985: Omnibot 2000

Why I had to have it: I circled this pricey little proto-bot in the Sears catalog, and even used two colors of ink — pink and blue. Ever since I tried to build my own robot years before (it was a disastrous failure), I’d dreamed of a helper robot. And Omnibot 2000 was to be my robot sidekick — it could even pour your drink! This little fella could motor about the house, track you with its eyes, respond to verbal commands … and did I mention the drink pouring?

Why I can only assume Santa couldn’t seal the deal: Even Santa’s credit card has limits… and the $599 price tag (in 80s dollars) probably was a bit much for the old man’s Diner’s Club card.

1986: Lazer Tag

Why I had to have it: Ever since the first childhood cries of “I shot you — you’re dead!” during a game of cops and robbers, kids have wanted an arbiter of fairness when playing toy guns. Lazer Tag was finally the way to see who the crack shot on the block was. And even if kids managed to cover the sensor on their silver vest, there was always the helmet to aim for.

Why I can only assume Santa couldn’t seal the deal: I honestly don’t know. The gun sets weren’t ridiculously overpriced — I can only assume that was the year I repeatedly picked my nose, wiped it on my mom’s good towels, and blamed my younger sister.

Seriously – I love living in an age where a single phrase from an old commercial can pop through my head, and thirty Internet seconds later:

…aaand, my favorite sum-up review catchphrase ever, at the 14-second mark:

It’s kind of an odd thing, maybe, since I enjoy a good adventure including mythical monsters and swordfights and demigods and magic, but there’s never been much fantasy on my bookshelves: The Lord of the Rings has been there since around 1976; so is The Sword of Shannara (but none of its sequels, of which I read only one); and Dragons of Autumn Twilight; and The Princess Bride. Once up on a time, you would have found the Dungeons & Dragons choose-your-0wn-adventuresque Pillars of Pentegarn and Mountain of Mirrors there, too. The only newer entrants in the genre are the seven Harry Potter books.

I think, though, the last fantasy I read was in January 2008 – the fourth book in Lian Hearn’s Otori saga, Harsh Cry of the Heron.

This year, though, I’ve wandered back into fantasy courtesy of Jim C. Hines and his Princess novels The Stepsister Scheme and The Mermaid’s Madness.

They don’t look like the kind of books I’d have stumbled onto – when I was reading Stepsister, my wife’s first chuckling reaction was “What’s up with the girls’ book?” and I can’t blame her, really, given that the cover image really doesn’t look like anything she’s seen me read before:

"What's up with the girls' book?"

Now, when I started reading this, it was in large part because a) Jim was just a really nice guy when Kelsey & I met him at Penguicon, and b) I wanted to check the book’s suitability for my daughter. What happened, of course, was that I totally got sucked into the story, digging Hines’ weaving of the dark side of fairy tales into new takes on old favorites Snow White, Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty.

While there are rescue quest at the heart of both Scheme and Madness, I thought the unfolding of the princesses’ back stories and their evolving relationships was as engaging as the main storyline in the first book.

"The Little Mermaid?" I think not.

That said, I enjoyed the sequel even more, I think, precisely because the primary tale – a meaty mix of love, powerlust, magic, warring kingdoms, and some land-and-sea battle action -  really carries the day here. Not that the heroines don’t grow significantly along the way, but we get to see them much more as they are in the story’s here and now, if that makes sense, as opposed to hearing the tales that shaped their lives.

I also found the sequel easier to read because I already knew the characters, and as the story gained steam, I wasn’t losing track of which princess was which. (This was a problem for me toward the end of the first book, because when the action was really cranking up, I had to constantly slow myself down and make sure I understood which Hines’ character equated to which “real” fairy-tale character – which matters because of those interlocking backstories – what with three princesses and assorted stepsisters and mothers all kicking ass all over the place.) In Madness, Talia, Danielle and Snow all hold their own places from the start.

I’m glad to have crossed paths with Mr. Hines this year, and to have gotten back into the fantasy realm through his stories, and I’m looking forward to the sequels, and to sharing the series with Kelsey.

(On a semi-related note, hi’s “20 Neil Gaiman Facts” – the literary equivalent of those Chuck Norris hyperbole lists – is one of the funnier blog bits I’ve read in a long time, and when it comes out on a T-shirt - yes, Neil’s given permission! – I’m all over it.)

We’ve all been to one at some point in our lives, or at least we’ve seen the pictures. The mindless droll that sets us back five intellectual years with every photo we see. I’m talking about ‘80s-themed parties. You can’t spend a weekend on a college campus without hearing about one.

“Party of the year”

The first quarter I was at SCAD, I got invited to “The Party of the Year,” according to some very credible sources. My knee-jerk reaction was to say no because it was, in fact, an ‘80s party. I get dragged to said party because I have unfortunate lapses of judgment and moments of pathetic weakness. Read more.

When I was 7, TV was my crystal ball. I really trusted it to tell me what life would be like when I was a teenager. TV was completely wrong, of course, because I never dated a Zach Morris in high school and I never developed a rack of epic proportions that made my older sister jealous. Which brings me unveil to you the most pivotal moments in television during the nineties. The TV moments that changed my life.

When Corey Cheated on Topanga

Remember the ski lodge? Remember that whore named Lauren who leeched off all the bum-legged tourist skiers who innocently spent the day off the slopes at the fireplace? Yea. Lauren, you are the root of all future problems between the most perfect TV couple of all time. Corey and Topanga were untouchable until YOU ruined everything with your ill-hidden perfumed pink letter. I grew up watching Boy Meets World and thinking that one day I would fall in love and it would be as perfect as what Corey had with Topanga. Then your little episode debut of DOOM came along. After 14 minutes I quickly realized that Corey Matthews was just another cheating hormone-induced cluster of XY chromosomes. Your episode taught me that love is FRAUD and the perfect love doesn’t exist.

When Jack Came Out on Dawson’s Creek

In the nineties, TV decided to shed light on a fairly taboo issue by making Capeside’s  ultimate guy’s guy, Jack McPhee, gay. I’ll be honest, the extent of what I knew about being gay was what I heard the boys yelling at each other during recess at school. Jack coming out was my first introduction to a (fictional) gay person. And hey it even allowed critics to casually ignore the absence of black people and other issues not stereotypically white in nature.

When Al Got Boobs on Step by Step

This episode led me to believe that one day in high school I would unexpectedly wake up with huge jugs, which I would at first hate, then in 30 minutes with the aid of my loving stepmother would grow to love. My sister would be jealous of my bodacious body. My brother would creepily ogle me. Life would be good. This turned out to be a false prediction.

When Becca and Tucker FINALLY Kissed

Built entirely around the sexual tension between two 14 year-olds, Disney’s Flash Forward just had to wait until the very last episode to get these two to kiss. Classic story of the goofy, funny “friend” guy who gets the girl, Tucker’s character is the type of guy I developed a soft spot for. I’m glad that I’m not followed around by melancholy music all the time, though.

Don’t get me wrong, I love Saved by the Bell, Full House, Growing Pains, and all those other unmentioned 90s TV shows — but none of those really changed my life.