These are the latest items currently on sale at Books From A Rose:

Thanks to all of our readers for sharing their best bargains on kids’ toys and clothing. Our winner will be announced on Wednesday, along with a list of our favorite entries.

In the mean time, we spotted this Where the Wild Things Are 36-piece floor puzzle by Mudpuppy for $3.99 at Lots for Tots in Falmouth. The same puzzle retails for $10.00 online. Later that day, we were thrilled to find more Mudpuppy puzzles at the HomeGoods store in South Portland, also for $3.99.

We love these mini puzzles because they feature some of our favorite story book characters, like Lois Lenski’s Cowboy Small and David McKee’s Elmer. Plus the cute packaging includes a carry handle, making the puzzle a perfect holiday gift for toddlers.

Lots for Tots, 240 U.S. Route 1, Falmouth, 347-8601

HomeGoods locations in South Portland, Bangor and Rockland:

http://www.homegoods.com

Yep, I did it again! I went on another date. This time, it was a blind date. She is a friend of a friends partner. We all (me, my friend from work, her partner, and my date) went to a comedy club last friday.

She was gorgeous!!!

I was quiet…

She has a 5 month old daughter!!!

That doesn’t bother me at all, but I didn’t tell her that…

She ordered the same drink I did!!!

But I didn’t make a single comment about it…

She got really mad about a drunk guy that kept running into me!!!

But I don’t believe in arguing with the drunk and stupid, so I didn’t make a sound…

She works in IT, like me!!!

But I didn’t ask a single question…

She later told my friend and her partner that I was very quiet!!!

And suddenly I sent off about 4 BILLION text messages to that friend about how lame I was and that she should really send the girl my person contact information!!!

And my friend sent off the information!!!!

But I haven’t heard a word…

Still single, and just realized that Elmer Fudd was talking about hunting, not dating.

Scott

[UPDATE] While I still haven’t heard from her personally, I have heard from my friend that she enjoyed the date and wishes I hadn’t been so quiet. She’s looking forward to date #2!

Which, by the way, at this point looks to be another double date in mid December. What are we doing? Going to a strip club!!!!

I sure do live an odd singles life!!!!

Scott

We zijn zo enthousiast over dit nieuwe blog, dat we snel nog een stukje typen.
Elmer gaat vandaag de halve marathon lopen, maar wat gaat Denise eigenlijk doen?

Zus Merel en schoonbroer Luc gaan Elmert aanmoedigen bij Brouwerij ‘t IJ, misschien wil Denisia wel mee.

We denken overigens dat Elmer een tijd gaat lopen van onder de 2 uur. 1.54.46 gokken we.

So, my little boy was 3 on Sunday and asked for a Mr Men party!  His favourite character is Mr Bump so the cake design was a bit of a no brainer really.  But of course that was really far too simple for me so as I had a party for his friends at lunchtime, then a family tea, I decided to make a batch of fairy cakes to go in the party bags, each with a  different character on, then I could use the Mr Bump cake again in the afternoon.

This was a huge success and the little ones all loved their mini cakes.  Somehow we even managed to avoid any arguments over who wanted which cake!  I also had inspiration for a very simple craft activity which resulted in something fun to take home instead of a party bag (I really have a pet hate against party bags filled with bouncy balls, pencils and blowers and try to give the children something memorable to take home rather than a bag of bits that they never use). 

So, back to the craft idea…  I printed off a sheet for each child with a border of Mr Messies top and bottom, I then typed Mr Messy at the top and their names at the bottom, trying to emulate the writing style from the front of the books.  All I then did was bought a very cheap ball of pink wool, which i cut into short lengths and cut some smiley mouths from black card, hole punched some black eyes and away they went armed with nothing more than a glue stick!  Once the children had assembled their pictures we laminated each one and they were left with their own Mr Messy messy mats to use at dinner time or when doing their own craft activities.  Great fun, very simple & very effective!

Sadly we ran out of time for musical Mr Bumps and “What’s the Time Mr Tickle”, although I did make a Mr Jelly for pudding (which unfortunately was a bit of a flop)

This is about the 6th birthday cake I’ve now made and I have finally plumped on a cake mix that I am happy with.  Following the books’ advice I had previously made a Madeira cake but these have been so horribly dry that combined with the inevitable heavy use of icing have been almost inedible.  Well, the last two cakes have been a simple 1,1,1 all in one cake mix, just with less baking powder (this particular batch was 7 eggs which gave one large cake & 12 fairies) and have been much nicer to eat which is never a bad thing!

some cakes from recent years………

                          but, if you want to see some really fantastic cakes, visit my friend’s gallery at http://www.facebook.com/friends/?filter=afp#/album.php?aid=13904&id=1130455632&ref=mf – she’s much more clever and will even make one for you!

In questo blog vorrei mettere tutta la mia esperienza nell’uso di software opensource per simulazioni fisiche in ambito industriale. Prima però voglio fare una carrellata dei software che utilizzerò e di cui farò esempi.

Preprocessing

gmsh: ottimo programma per generare una mesh da zero o da un file stl. Windows e Linux

Salome: Piattaforma per preprocessing e postprocessing, davvero molte funzioni peccato che il manuale non sia all’altezza. Linux

Postprocessing

Salome: Piattaforma per preprocessing e postprocessing, davvero molte funzioni peccato che il manuale non sia all’altezza. Linux

Paraview: Davvero un ottimo programma di postprocessing, veloce e stabile. Windows e Linux

Computational Fluid Dynamics

Code Saturne: Programma per CFD usato in ambito compressibile, davvero completo. Linux

OpenFOAM: Toolbox per la CFD ottimo soprattutto per la flessibilità di utilizzo. Linux

FEM

Code Aster: Forse il miglior software FEM opensource. Linux e Windows

Syrthes: Analisi termica non stazionaria con possibilità di utilizzo con Code Saturne. Linux

Multiphysics

Elmer: Potenzialmente può fare tutto. Linux e Windows

Matematica

Scilab: Programma per il calcolo numerico. Windows e Linux

Octave: Clone di Matlab. Linux

Maxima: Programma per il calcolo algebrico. Linux e Windows

Ovviamente questi sono quelli che conosco ed utilizzo ce ne sono anche altri!!!

Wow! What a great day I had yesterday! I just passed by the new Annex building at SM Fairview and here’s what I found!

It’s the “KOMIKS: YARING PINOY” exhibit by PICCA (Phil. Intl. Cartoon Comics and Animation) which will run from September 21-28.  They featured works from a wide range of art from editorials, mainstream comics, manga-style comics, original works, classics and even indie comics!

Works by the great Larry Alcala (Slice of Life) , Larry Alcala (Superman, Elmer) , Leinil Yu (X-Men, Wolverine) and many more! So make sure you check out their website here and see  what Filipino talent is all about!

Here’s a taste of some amazing art from our own countrymen and please don’t judge their work based on the crappy resolution of my phone. See them for yourself!

Check out http://www.piccafest.com/ for more info!

Tell me what you think!

Ewan, Leif, Aurelius, Banjo, Cosimo, Milo, Rafferty, Ned, Leland, Bernie, Jonas, Rex, Ciaran, Abe, Cole, Cullen, Edward, Harvey, Henry,Hugh, Ira, Meyer, Otis, Oren, Roosevelt, Noah, Oscar, Elihu, Kofi, Tenzin, Asa, Isidro, Edme, Galileo, Alexander, Art, Elias, Ole, Otto, Rexford, Silas, Arlo, Bartholomew, Knox, Montgomery, Inis, Romney, Ryo, Bruno, Indigo, Jasper, Arno, Aries, Bram, Jay, Jonah, Leo, Oisin, Grover, Heath, Ivo, Ephraim, Arthur, Bart, Dexter, Elmer, Theodore, Oswald, Cassius, Ambrose, Elliot, Joel, Nilo, Felix, Emmitt, Julius, Baxter, Christian, Hector, Wallace, Abel, Thabo, Augustus, Abraham, Calvin, Chester, Franklin, Grover, Millard, Lyon, Russell, Rutherford, Tazewell, Caius, Cato, Iago, Orlando.

I haven’t collected many QSL cards in my lifetime; shockingly few, as a matter of fact.  The reasons are several, but I won’t delve into them here.  I’m not even sure where the cards that I received under my UK callsign of G4IFA are – probably back in England somewhere. Perhaps my brothers saved them when they cleared out my parent’s house, or perhaps they got lost somehow during my years of moving not only to another country, but during my many moves within my new adopted country, the USA. To make matters even worse, I cannot find my logbooks before 1992. This has all been quite distressing to me, but if they don’t turn up during my next visit to the UK, I will have to give them up for lost.

Anyway, the thing that I am slowly coming round to mentioning is that of all the QSO’s I have had, there are a few memorable ones that I would have liked to have had QSL’s for, but those aside, the amateur stations from which I most wish I had QSL’s are the amateurs I knew on a personal basis that elmered and halped me when I was starting out.  They are the hams that I talked to on the air on a quite regular basis – mostly on 80M and on 2M, and because they were local and because I knew them, just didn’t bother to give them a QSL and seek one in return from them. Several of them are now silent keys.

Probably the most significant elmer to me was Norman Maries G4FHP (SK).  When I started attending The Redditch Radio Club in Worcestershire in the UK as an eager 15 year-old, I met Norman, an ex-Navy man who was diabetic and blind (he hadn’t been blind from birth and I’m assuming that his blindness was linked to his diabetes.) I didn’t know many of the details as a kid, but Norman wasn’t in service by the time I met him.  We were a good match; I was a youngster, eager to spend time with an experienced ham and keen to sit in his shack and talk radio, and he had the time, and the generosity to give me some of that time.  He occasionally needed help constructing circuits due to his blindness;  I was good at assembling from schematics and was happy to wire up as many parts as he could throw my way.  It was just the biggest treat to sit in his shack and watch him take part in his regular net on 80M with his ex-navy pals. I remember looking at his FT-101E and wondering if one day it would be possible for me to have a radio that cool. We went on 2M FM with his IC-215 and I was as happy as a bug in a rug.

Then after a few more years I went away to University and for the most part shelved my ham radio hobby.  On graduating from University, I moved to the US, and it would be a few more years before I decided to get a US license.  Occasional periods of activity interspersed with longer periods of inactivity followed for almost the next 20 years.  At some point I found out that Norman, my elmer, had passed away.  I felt really bad for not keeping in touch with him.  I sent a letter of condolence to his widow Inge, and wished that I had told Norman how important he had been to me.  That old saying about telling people how you feel while you still have a chance, is very true.  I don’t even have a photo of him, or one of his QSL’s.

Gordon G3EES was a clergyman who lived in the Malvern area of the UK.  I remember him giving me a guided tour of Worcester Cathedral (a beautiful medieval cathderal built about 900 years ago, with a crypt that is 1000 – 1100 years old).  He was a source of much local history and had a great enthusiasm for telling it to others.  He lived in a cottage in the countryside, and his landlady must have been very understanding, as he had telephone poles installed in the back garden that supported his HF antenna. Very impressive! I went to University, moved away from home, eventually moved to the US and only thought some years later to try and track him down.  His callsign wasn’t listed anymore, and as he was an older gentleman when I knew him in around 1980, I’m thinking that he is most likely a silent key by now.

There were others too.  Because I knew these people personally, I never tried to get a QSL card from them.  I mean, how much of an achievement was a QSO on 80M with someone 10 miles down the road? However, as an adult living in another time and place, to have a physical reminder of my elmers would be really great.

So here’s what I’m getting at with this post.  This first part applies universally – make sure to let people who influenced you in a positive manner know what an effect they had on your life. Make sure that you do it while you still can.

The second part is this – keep all your old logbooks.  They contain precious memories – and don’t limit your QSL collection to DX stations and stations that can help you qualify for the fancy awards.  Make sure to get and keep some QSL’s from the hams you know personally – especially your elmers.  One day they may not be around, and you’ll have something to remember them by.

To Whom It May Concern,

I have taken about as much as I can stand here. I have tried my hardest to keep the peace and pretend that everything is fine, but let me assure you, everything is NOT fine. I am NOT enjoying my stay at Hunched Pines Retirement Community.
The food is horrible, the televisions are mostly black and white, and the soda machines cost 75 cents!!! Who ever heard of a Coca-Cola that cost 75 cents!? It’s highway robbery!
I’d also like to point attention to nurse Dove. She has been refusing my advances lately. If she’s not interested in me, she should keep her hands to herself, and dress like she has a husband, if indeed she has one, which I do not think that she does. And if she is interested in me, like I think she is, then she needs to stop refusing my caresses and kisses. I think you should address this with her. Or fire her to let her know you’re serious, and then rehire her.
I am tired of hearing people die also. It is not a pleasant sound, let me tell you. Apparently however, your faculty treats the sounds of the elderly passing away like it’s the best Benny Goodman concert they ever did hear.
I think something is strange about that Derek fellow. He always gives people the most horrible smile. Especially he can hear someone in the building who is dying. He looks like a snake. Also, I think he’s after nurse Dove, who has the hots for me, if I’m not mistaken. So I also hate him because of that. Also, he’s a snake.
My most important point is about sex. I know how much you hate hearing your elders talk about sex, but believe me; it’s as natural as a flower that’s nearly withered away. How am I ever going to convince nurse Dove to go steady with me, if we’re always forced to keep our doors open? If we don’t get intimate soon, I’m afraid she might lose interest. I might lose interest too. Well, probably not. She’s lovely and reminds me of my dead wife Helen. I’ve told her this on several occasions before sliding my hand over her bosom or thigh, but usually she slaps it. You need to have a word with her about that.
And another thing, I can’t believe how much a Coca-Cola costs! 75 cents per bottle?? Who ever heard of such a thing?! And also, you need to be SURE to get the Coca-Cola bottles. I think some of those bottles might be cans! You’re probably getting the raw end of the stick from your soda guy. Get that fixed, and also don’t forget to talk to nurse Dove.

-Sincerely,
Elmer Winkle

Perto da Felicidade, de Richard Yates e Balas de Prata, de Élmer Mendoza. Mais informações por aqui.

After last week’s bumper crop o’ starbabies, it has been a relatively quiet week.  

The only big question is this:  Did Hank Azaria really name his son Hal?  Or have they simply not released his full name?  Wikipedia tells me that dad’s full name is, indeed, Hank Albert - so maybe they decided junior should have a nickname name, too.

Here’s the rest of the news:

• In RL, I live in one of two towns that can claim to be Jim Henson’s boyhood home.  (We cover the teenage years, including high school.)  And I’m a huge David Bowie fan.  But I’d forgotten that Bowie’s Goblin King character in 1986’s Labyrinth was called Jareth until I saw a teenager sporting it on his plastic nametag. He’s one of the few, though – Jareth has never caught on as a name, not even cracking the US Top 1000;
• I wasn’t expecting former Girl Next Door Kendra Wilkinson to name her daughter Esther or Mary, but ever since she announced her pregnancy, there’s been endless chatter about her frontrunner name for a girl – Kaleigh.  Apparently, Kendra’s middle name is Leigh.  (And her first initial is, obviously, K.)  A boy would be named after dad, Philadelphia Eagle Hank Baskett.  (Hank again!  That’s an AppMtn record.)  But that would be Henry Randall Baskett IV – not bad, actually;
• In other reality star baby news, Real Housewife of New Jersey Jacqueline Laurita welcomed son Nicholas Francis, little brother to CJ and Ashley.  I assume CJ stands for Christopher Jr. but I’m not sure ’bout that.  Another cast member is also expecting a visit from the stork;
• Guiding Light’s Jessica Leccia welcomed a daughter named Ivy Lola;
• From this week’s Toronto Star comes the report of a couple with five kids.  Lucky number five is named Angus Raymond Mercury.  Wait for it – Angus is after Angus Young of AC/DC and Mercury is after Freddie Mercury of Queen.  (Raymond is after a mere blood relative.)  Angus’ four big sibs are called Madelyn May (May after Brian May of Queen); Heath, after a golf course in Scotland; Shea, after Shea Stadium and Cheyenne.  Apparently mom veto’d Kashmir, as in the Led Zeppelin song – all of a sudden Shea and Cheyenne sound like perfectly reasonable choices.
• If you follow sports news, you might’ve picked up this report (Click here for ESPN’s coverage)  Apparently, a high school senior all set to play football for FSU was drafted by the Milwaukee Brewers.  I can barely catch a ball, so the idea of being recruited in two sports?  Wow.  Anyhow, the uber-athlete’s name is Jacobbi McDaniel – one Jacob variant I had not heard previously;
• As if my linking to ESPN is not proof enough that it was a quiet week, names-wise, the Daily Express announces that wacky names are nuthin’ new.  As they await the opportunity to comment on the next wacky celeb baby name, of course.

From the wayback machine – a year ago, the Name of the Day was Madrigal.  Really.  This week’s names will be Naomi, Lyle, Eugenie, Boaz and Kylie.

I’ll leave you with a quick update on search names – Esme continues to top the list.  Lorelei, Isla, Pomeline, Java, Eithne, Aurelia, Ayelet, Noa and Oona are close behind.  The list is much shorter for boys: Finn, Elmer and Remus.  If you can’t tell from the list, boys generate far fewer searches than girls.  And yet, nearly everyone agrees that boys’ names are harder to decide than girls’ names. 

I’m off to fill up the wading pool for me the kids.  As always, thanks for reading!

Que levante la mano quien no haya tarareado alguna vez el tema principal de “La Gran Evasión” (John Sturges, 1936), porque seguro que muy poca gente levantará la mano, hayan visto o no la película. Y el causante de todo esto es otro SEÑOR con mayúsculas: Elmer Berstein, que lo mismo le ponía música a un western que a Moisés proclamando los 7 mandamientos en el desierto.

Porque los grandes conseguían eso, dotar de vida propia a cada una de sus composiciones. Estaba su sello reconocible, claro está, en una época donde la importancia orquestar prevalecía sobre todas las cosas. Pero la batuta de Berstein era magnífica, era genial, era creativa y emotiva. Sabía captar lo más esencial de la cinta, sabía contarnos con música lo que los actores hacían a través de un libreto. Y eso le fue muy reconocido y alabado, en todas las décadas en las que musicalizó el cine.

Algunos grandes ejemplos, a parte de “La Gran Evasión“, son “Los 7 Magníficos” (John Sturges, 1960), “La Edad de la Inocencia” (Martin Scorsese, 1993) o la entrañable “Cazafantasmas,” de la que guardamos todos los de la generación de principios y mediados de los ´80 un gran recuerdo (Ivan Reitman, 1984).

Aunque resumir toda su vida compositora en un par de filmes es no hacerle justicia, aquí va una muestra selectiva de sus grandes composiciones…

Crunch time for the Events Coordinator!

There are 8 working days until the With A Little Help From My Friends Benefit Concert. Not that I’m counting. The following is a glimpse into my first few hours of work today. And it’s only going to get busier.

My Desk

1) ARRIVE AT WORK

“Good morning, Matina. Good morning, AnnMarie. Good morning, Heather.”

Where’s my intern, Brian? Oh, yeah he’s out today. Why did I agree to him having the day off before the workday tomorrow? Oh, well.

2) CHECK EMAIL

Message
Jason, go ahead and write that blog you volunteered yourself for yesterday. Doh!

Message
Jason, have you scheduled housekeeping for all the spaces we’ll be using for the benefit? We talked about that yesterday. Didn’t we? Wait, that was someone else. Yes. Did it. Done.

Message
Jason, I won’t be here for the benefit concert staff meeting. Let me know what you want me to do that Sunday. You can have my job.

3) YAHOO! MAIL
From Facebook – “Cristy posted a link on your Wall.”

4) FACEBOOK
Dave Matthews Band on Fuse TV all next week. Awesome!
I don’t get that channel. The opposite of awesome.

5) DON’T FORGET TO EAT

OK. What do I need to accomplish today?

Dumpsters. Check. PortaPots. Check. I hope we have enough golf carts. Who NEEDS a walkie-talkie and who THINKS they need a walkie-talkie? Oooh, another volunteer registration! Yay! Where should I assign them? Recycling crew? No. That reminds me, where are we going to place all of the trashcans and recycle bins? Achoo! Stupid allergies. Should I make a new map? If Brian were here today, I’d make him do it.

Wait, where is the box office?

Head outside on the grounds for 30 minutes with Sean and Heather to discuss where the Box Office is going to be. Information booth is there, camp booth over there, food vendors are gonna be…doh! – can’t put them that close to the stage cuz their generators might be – Achoo! – noisy. Speaking of generators, I need to call the electrician and ask him if we can get 208 volt, 3-phase, 60 amps of power for the stage lighting. I don’t even know what that means! Now, what did I do with his phone number?

“Achoo! Achoo!” Ok, that’s enough! Time to head to the IGA and pickup some Claritin. It’s lunch-time so I should get something to eat before I head back. Ooh, I’d better drive down that dirt road to the Meadow field and make sure it’s clear for trucks on June 7^th. A little muddy, but it’s good. Back to the office.

Hmmmm…Who is that coming up the stairs? “Butch, I have a question for you. What kind of pipes and/or electrical lines are underground at the corner of the driveway? I need to know if we can auger holes there to set up the Box Office sign.” (6 minute conversation ensues) Call the electrician – no answer. Man, I really should have gotten some food. My stomach is….oh! crap. I still gotta write that blog.

Jason Blacketer
Starving Events Coordinator

Gerry Alanguilan’s Elmer in the simplest sense, is a crazy idea taken very seriously. It took me a couple of readings to really appreciate the piece. The concept of chickens gaining sentience is possible enough to really think about it for a moment. It’s almost like George Orwell’s Animal Farm and the made-for-TV 1999 adaptation, minus all the other farms animals. It does seem hard to accept the fact that chickens, a frail and timid animal, can assimilate themselves with the human race. Truth be told, it’s all just a lack of understanding and accepting change.

So, I had a chance to offer my two cents on the subject. A final plate for my composition class required us to use mixed media on a 2 x 3 canvas. Running out of ideas, I turned to my comic books for inspiration and this was the product.

Sponsored by:  Carlos Cerrato and family

Age:  6

Grade:  Kindergarten

Elmer is a child with a tender look and a sweet smile. His family has very limited resources and the children often go hungry. The Great Commission Church built a home for the family to house Elmer, 3 other siblings, and their parents.  Elmer’s father is a man 84 years of age is called Miguel Montoya.  He can no longer get a job, so he spends his days gathering sticks to sell for firewood, but this does not provide enough money to feed the family. Elmer’s mother, whose name is Martinez Syria, is a 42-year-old illiterate peasant who is not able to get a job in the city because of her illiteracy.

A few years ago our friends at Comcast donated a bright red electric guitar to Appel Farm.   Some among us immediately had visions of taking their place among the pantheon of rock guitar gods such as Clapton, Page and Gilmour.  Upon realizing that would mean putting 10,000 hours of practicing it was decided that the next best thing was to write all over the guitar!

Well, not quite.  We took it back stage at our Festival in 2006 and 2007 and had performers autograph the guitar in silver ink.  Janis Ian was the first to sign it and she may even have supplied the silver pen. 

Following her lead were such luminaries as Joan Armatrading, Leon Redbone, Chris Smither, North Mississippi Allstars, Duncan Sheik, James Hunter, Danielia Cotton, Adrienne Young and members of Fountains of Wayne, Toad The Wet Sprocket and Slo Mo.

This guitar has since endowed my office with a sense of hipness but the time has come to part with this one-of-a-kind trophy for a greater cause.

On Sunday, June 7th, Appel Farm will host With A Little Help From My Friends, an outdoor music and arts celebration to benefit the Rising Young Artists Camp Scholarship Fund.  An exciting part of that event will be a Silent Auction in which concert attendees will have an opportunity to bid on many exciting items and help raise funds for the cause.  On that day you will have a chance to bid on this guitar and maybe take home a piece of musical history!

Come early and check out the guitar and other items in the Silent Auction.  I am looking forward to seeing who will become its proud owner!

Sean Timmons
Artistic Director

————————————–

Advance tickets for the concert are available now:

Friends Lawn Seating:
$28.50.  Ages 17 and under are admitted FREE of charge.

Blankets only upfront, close to the stage.  Further back and each side of the tent will have plenty of space for low back lawn chairs etc.  All with a good view of the stage,

“Undercover” Tent Seating:
$45.00.  Ages 17 and under $20.00

The tent will be centered a short distance from the stage (with “blankets only” lawn seating in front of the tent).  Folding chairs with padded seats will be arranged in rows under the tent.  Seating will be by general admission for patrons with required wristbands.  Limited availability.  Advance purchase advised.

Elmer was one of the evening bartenders who worked in my parent’s restaurant. His shift began at five, but he walked through the parking lot door at four thirty dressed in black pants, polished shoes, white shirt and tie. His hair was combed to the left and his cheeks were scrubbed and rosy.

We lived above the restaurant, five kids, mom and dad, a crow, raccoon, dogs and too many cats to count.

I’d filled a metal bucket from the barn with cold water and hauled it upstairs slopping it wet against my bib overalls and over my feet. The bucket was cold and hard to grasp but I managed to hoist it to the second story window.

I was eager to try a trick I’d seen on a morning cartoon show, the one where the cat fixes a bucket of water over a door, so the dog that’s chasing him gets drenched when it opens. Now Elmer had done nothing wrong, he was not chasing me; I just wanted to see how this worked and he was the first person I thought of. I didn’t have long to wait, he was punctual. 

Elmer straightened his tie as he left his Ford and took a quick peek at his image in the side mirror, then gave a little grin of self-approval. I studied him like a hawk. When he put his hand on the restaurant door, I tipped the bucket and let it go. A perfect bulls-eye!

I’ll never forget the way his hair plastered against his scalp and the transparent flesh tones of his shirt. He looked up at me with wide eyes, and an expression of horror and surprise.

I hoped he might compliment me on my daring and ingenuity, but he took a different view. God Damn you, he said, you little unsupervised shit. He walked in the door of the restaurant, had a talk with my dad and walked right out again. Elmer took the night off. 

A few months later I was walking barefoot in tall grass when I ran across a rusty fish hook. It lodged in the tender fold between my toes and had barbs that made it impossible to pull out. I don’t remember moving, just hollering for help. Elmer was on his way to work. When he saw me, he just smiled and walked by. I guess he still had the water incident stored in his grudge pile. I don’t remember how that one was resolved, but doctors were as hard to get to as outer space so they weren’t called. Someone cut that thing off me, but I no longer remember who.

You might think there were consequences for my actions with Elmer, since my dad lost a bartender that night, but there were none. We were spanked a few times, but mostly it was a case of live and let live.