http://rapidshare.com/files/314930309/30_Seconds_To_Mars_-_Kings_And_Queens.mpg

http://rapidshare.com/files/326930879/basshunter-all_i_ever_wanted-x264-2008-se.mkv

I hate my life.

Times like these that I miss you guys.

Photo by Alexis Rhone Fancher

my appetite is

sullen

a ghost of hollow
membrane.

I am wicker
in a redwood forest
brittle twigs
snapping under foot.

my bare necessities
exposed to the draft.

I go toward your
beacon of light,
you have turned off
your high beams,
the fog is thick

as dense as
the minefield of love.

“Play Misty For Me”
is faint on the radio.
a tear escapes

down
my cheek,

as I try
to recall
who I am.

L. K. Thayer

All Rights Reserved

© 2009

Three weeks ago, a child at work- well she is 13, so that makes her a teenager- asked if I cry. My answer? “sure I do.” She wanted to know when was the last time. I tried to recall then told her this summer. She wanted to know why? I told her my mom’s visit was cathartic. She further inquired “and you haven’t cried since?” I replied, “no I haven’t.” Almost complaining she said, “that’s months ago… what about before that?” I couldn’t remember. Told her this and offered the endnote, “I’m not a cryer.” She said “I cry a lot.” I suggested, “it may have to do with your hormones; puberty can have that affect.” She said “no, I cried a lot even before…movies, feelings of being overwhelmed…you name it, all make me cry. I cry almost every day.” I said “okay. That’s fine too.” She said “I know.” Then asked, “how do you not cry in months?” I answered “I don’t know.”

And I really don’t know because in the past couple of days, I cried more than I did this entire year.

Peter Joseph seems to have a mission. A mission to destroy the faith of Christians everywhere.  With his movie “Zeitgeist”, he makes bold claims about the Christian faith and makes comparisons between the stories of the Bible and pagan religions. Apparently, Mr. Joseph isn’t as well-educated as he would like others to assume. He makes random comparisons without documentation and plainly just makes up his own facts.  Thankfully, there are those who do know the facts and have come forth to refute the claims made by Mr. Joseph.  The entire part of the movie that deals with the story of Jesus has been refuted and made into a documentary.   I will post the first video of 12. For more info go to: http://www.holybibleprophecy.org/

Something those of you should be aware of about Satan. He wants to be God but he can’t. So what does he do? He likes to copy things God does and twists them into his liking. So it makes sense that there would be similar stories of the Bible being spread throughout the world.  When you watch this documentary you are given some insight that the discovery of those other stories do not pre-date Christ.  They actually arose later than previously thought.

The Law of Attraction and the teachings of Abraham state that what gets most of your attention will attract more of the same. But is it enough to sit around thinking about getting wealthy and expect the money to come flooding down the chimney without doing anything? Is it enough to sit around imagining my wonderful evolved future Katie and then expect to wake up one morning to the perfect body without doing anything? Do I have to figure out the how of our transformation and then get to it?

It’s Been Driving Me Crazy

In order to work the Law of Attraction I have to stay in a good feeling state. Yet when I contemplated all the old tried and true ways of losing weight (calorie restriction and exercise OCD) I felt worse not better. All I could think of was the hunger, the cold, the depression and the inevitable binges. I couldn’t find very many actions I could take that would give me relief.

In the same way that wealth flows into your life through being paid for doing something you already do for free, selling your crap for outrageous prices on eBay, or discovering money at the bottom of the pool I have been looking for inspired action ~ an easy and fun way to get lean, fit and healthy without the usual stress and struggle.

The Still Small Voice and Synchronicity

Now this is very convoluted so stick with me …

1. Jen at PriorFatGirl did an exposed post and has sent tons of new visitors to my site. I checked out her blog and loved it so I subscribed.
2. Then she posted that she was starting an online book club with the book “The Complete Beck Diet for Life” by Judith Beck
3. I thought about joining the book club, dismissed it, saw a reference to the same book somewhere else and then decided to listen to the still small voice.
4. I went looking for the book on my bookshelves but instead of finding the wrong Judith Beck book (I’ve got “The Beck Diet Solution”) I picked up the other Beck diet book  I have called “The 4-Day Win” by Martha Beck
5. I decided to flick through it just before I went to bed on Christmas Eve, and three hours later, I had read the whole book (fairly superficially). It was exactly what I was looking for. It made perfect sense and gave me enormous relief
6. I finally went to bed and after a couple of hours woke up, got up and started to read again from the beginning (properly this time). Better feeling thoughts and a bubbling of joy started busting out of my brain and my heart.

New Year’s Evolution

It is the last hurrah of 2009 and in the past this has been a time of reflection on the year that’s been and a time to set great big scary goals for the next year. Not this year, my friends, not in this corner of blogsville.

There will be no number of days until … countdown, there will be no kgs targeted to lose and there will be no starving/bingeing. What there will be is a raw, open and honest exploration into my psyche to uncover and reprogram the wonky computer software in my head.

There will be notes, tables, checklists and mindmaps because you know that’s how I roll. There will be phrases like body whispering, famine brain, the watcher, the dictator and the wild child that you will get tired of hearing. But best of all there will be a permanent, natural, and enjoyable transformation that will take place before your eyes.

Come along for the wild ride … I am so excited!! I am taking inspired action.

Reviews for the 4-Day Win

• It definitely isn’t the same old plate of beans–put your fork down after every bite! Use a smaller plate! Instead, it explains the latest findings in brain research, and how we’re hard-wired to respond to dieting the way our ancient selves responded to any other kind of stress–by storing fat. No wonder the usual dieting always fails. Martha shows you how to “retrain your brain” with different exercises that won’t make your body go into that stress response. She teaches you how to talk back to those voices in your head–the Dictator (“You WILL lose weight!”) and the Wild Child (“Yeah, MAKE me!”). She shows you how to SIN (substitute inedible nourishment), so that every time you don’t eat, you have to do something else small and nice for yourself, so losing weight doesn’t feel like punishment. I’ve never seen this kind of advice anywhere. Plus the book is really, really funny.
• I’ve never written a book review before, but this book has seriously changed my life — and I’ve never had reason to say that. As silly as this may sound to some, I can now keep cookies and ice cream in my house until they go stale. I eat only when I want to, where I want to and whatever I happen to feel like eating — no restrictions at all, only sanity. I have reached my goal for the first time in my entire 55 years on this planet without dieting, without binging, without ANY food-frantic behaviors. In fact, I now have to remind myself to eat at all; I am too busy being happy.

→ photo : Maria Keays

This interview got me in a really good mood. I guess most of you might have already seen this one on YouTube, but I wanted to share it with you anyway.

What got me really excited was hearing about the next album reissues to come. I can not wait to see and hear what he will do with Hergest Ridge, Ommadawn and Exposed.

Many people commented on how relaxed Mike seemed to be in this interview and I can totally agree with that, it was very nice to see.

Asbestos is a very abundant and very dangerous material. Inhalation of asbestos fibers are microscopic air can cause mesothelioma, lung cancer and asbestosis. Many people have been exposed to asbestos either at work or in their homes without their knowledge. This article will help you understand the sources of exposure to asbestos, and find out if it could have been the victim of gross negligence. If you have developed> Mesothelioma, asbestosis and lung cancer, and it is thought that it was asbestos, you may have a right by law. The risk of toxic exposure is greater for people in industries and jobs that asbestos products were used processed. These include:

Asbestos, uranium mines
Manufacture of asbestos tiles
Manufacture of asbestos-containing materials
Shipbuilding Trades
Insulation work in construction
Electricians
Plasterers
Pipelayers
Railwaymen
Demolition
Drywall
Drywall Removal
Other asbestos
Fire Fighting
Asbestos Tiles
Kettle Workers
Aluminum Plant Workers
Manufacture of brake and ship repair liningsShipbuilding involves many materials that contain asbestos, and workers working on construction sites were often small, poorly ventilated with materials that are released large quantities of asbestosFibers into the air. In Southern California, Long Beach Shipyard (also known as U.S. Naval Dry Docks and Terminal Island shipyard), the San Diego Naval Shipyard, NASSCO, and thousands of workers in the shipbuilding trades have occupied, including pipe fitters, Boilermakers , electricians, welders, mechanics, filers, polishers, grinders, buffers, hardening, maintenance workers, engineers, designers and others.

People who worked in construction, in any capacity, includingas a matter of weeks or months, at some point in their lives, are at increased risk of developing mesothelioma. You should always tell their healthcare providers about their exposure.

Many people live in houses built before 1990 in which asbestos is used widely in construction, or work or attend school in buildings where asbestos has been used. As long as the asbestos-containing materials such as tile and asphalt roofing materials are not polished,scraped, filed, cut or otherwise disturbed or removed, the asbestos fibers are less likely to go out into the air and the inhalation is low.

If a person lives and works in a structure in which one or more of these or other asbestos-containing materials have been removed or disturbed, increasing the risk of exposure. Removal of asbestos-containing products should be performed only by operators trained in asbestos removal.

If youreceived a diagnosis of mesothelioma, and it is believed that the developed mesothelioma as a result of exposure to asbestos at work, you may have a right in court against the company, allowing the display or the producer of asbestos products.

Been feeling kinda shy here on my blog of late. Protective. Little did I know that writing some posts on Swamiji’s passing would draw the number of visitors that it did – a good 600% of my usual traffic!

Then I got a little overexcited on Twitter and created the #yogadorks of the world map… hehe!

Not that I regret those things at all, but there’s a part of me that wants this blog to remain hidden. It’s easier to say what I want to say if I’m over here with only a handful people looking.

I’m not after extensive readership, not for this blog. But maybe I’ll write another one some time under my own name, who knows?

So I’m happy with a handful of readers, just the people who get it, y’know?

However, nowadays there’s more than a few people that know who I am beyond my nom de plume. For the most part I don’t mind so much, I guess. There’s a tiny percentage of people I really really wish I’d never lifted the veil of anonymity for (which makes me even more protective of my identity). But I suspect those don’t folks read my blog any more anyway. I hope!

You never know, though. Thing is, once you’ve given up your real life identity instead of remaining 100% Clark Kent-ish, everything changes. And there are some things I don’t want to change.

Like… noticing that I’ve drawn away from my usual candidness. I see it. I still have a bunch of stories that need to be written and I want to write them, I do. I want to scrape the fetid remnants from their bolthole and set them free! So they can decompose gracefully and no longer cause me sorrow, fear or anger etc.

Writing has and continues to be hugely helpful to work through my stuff, along with yoga and meditation (but of course).

Sometimes I find the act of publishing an intensely personal/painful story affords me a perspective I can’t get when it’s all inside my mind. But to do so takes me to raw and edgy places, and to allow myself such rawness, I need safety.

My blog was created to be that safe place. But lately, I’ve been feeling a little uncomfortable about posting some of the more intense things I want to say. I worry about who is reading, and what I’m sharing in my paradoxical public/private space.

But anyway, I’ve decided it’s time to get on with it! Bite the bullet and remember why I started this blog in the first place. Regardless.

I’ve spun some unfinished tales out over this entire year. Perversely, that makes me feel a little anxious! They need closure… and there’s others I’ve not even hinted at yet. They need to be told, too.

Shadows are far worse than the full light of day. Identifying and revealing my fears, while it may appear petulant, pitiful, immature or whatever… is beneficial in the long run. For me at least. And maybe for those that’ve had similar experiences of human being-ness, too.

So what the heck!

I just hope those who do know the yogini behind the blog… won’t find January’s stories to be too… whatever. If you know what I mean.

~Svasti

Hey check out the latest bug I found on Windows 7. Wondering how many of you noticed it. So here’s how you check its presence:

1. Search for a song in your library in WMP12. Dont type in the entire name, but only a few words so that more than one results are returned.

2. Select anyone song randomly from middle of list and play it.

3. Now drag this song to the top of your Now Playing list and Voila.

You will see that the time duration stamp of the top song in the list is changed to the time duration of this song which is playing. The time duration stamp will change only when this song starts playing.

I love this guest post (the link may or may not work..it didn’t work for me…so I decided to post it here, cause I LOVE her story). I don’t know about you..but the thought of losing a boob is some what terrifying to me. My grandma had both of hers removed.

Cindy shows us all that we don’t have to hide in that fear. I Love It! It’s the time of year for celebrating what we have, where we’re at and counting our blessings. Enjoy!

Women all over the world need to think about what this simple exercise can do for them. Instead of pointing out the flaws with your body, you point out the great things your body has done for you and what you like about your body.

I AM a tough Texas Woman…some of the time, when I need to be, when I HAVE to be. I was a fat kid, raised on beef, candy bars and Coca-Cola. I starved myself as a teenager to lose weight. I was on a regimen of no breakfast, diet Dr. Pepper and chips for lunch and very little dinner. This did not make for a healthy body, only a skinny one. This diet gave me no energy, allergies and I was also terribly shy. I felt terrified of weight gain, which I believe has affected my general health.

I AM also a breast cancer survivor. My cancer taught me that I want to LIVE! It has also taught me that stressing over anything as changeable and uncontrollable as how you look is a waste of precious life energy. Although I am still vain, I know that I might as well enjoy myself, care for myself with healthy food and exercise and LIVE my life to the fullest of my capacity. Live! Laugh! Love!

Many blessings,

Cindy from Texas

You can find more Exposed Movement posts here.

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There were a number of positive qualities of the material. For example, is resistant to heat. It is flame retardant, was used because it can absorb sound. An interesting fact aboutAsbestos is that it is also chemically resistant. Having already chemicals that do not degrade and has suspended all its unique properties of sound absorbing and fire protection.

Problems caused by asbestos fibers when the air that gets inhaled. It is maintained as exposure to lead, these fibers cause a variety of symptoms and cancer. However, this does not mean that someone is only a couple of times to develop mesothelioma suspended. It may be aThe number of years for the damage that must be done. E 'can develop many years for the symptoms.

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