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Disney CFO Announces Frozen 2

BURBANK, CA—Confirming the expectations of several market analysts, the Chief Financial Officer of The Walt Disney Company announced that pre-production has started on Frozen 2… 149 more words

Satire

Writerly Wilderness

ANCHORAGE, AK–A group of committed writers have simultaneously decided to take a hiatus from society. Operating under the moniker The Pariahs, they have collectively rented out the full entirety of False Pass, Alaska, a community whose population typically numbers just 35. 204 more words

Quarks of nature

In matter-that-doesn’t news, the recent discovery of a four-quark something or other has triggered a new round of physics gang warfare.

The new particles go by the name Z(4430).  463 more words

Humor

That's Not Atheism

BY Humble Party

Brent Lin met with Pastor Bowser at First Evangelical Atheist Church to discuss becoming part of the congregation.

“So Brent, tell me about why you would like to join our congregation,” Pastor Bowser began, leaning over his tall mahogany desk. 556 more words

Fake News

Blackwood Gazette #4: Tragedy Strikes the Empress Theater in Oeil de Fleur

17/4-Today is a sad day in the history of the arts, as the Empress Theater, the oldest stage in the civilized world, was reduced to ash last night during a performance of Delando’s newest magnum opus. 153 more words

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Little Timmy Found Dead At Bottom Of Chicago Pothole

CHICAGO, IL—Residents of Chicago were devastated this morning to discover that Timothy Martin, known to the locals as “Little Timmy,” was found dead at the bottom of a pothole located at the corner of Franklin and Van Buren. 145 more words

Local

Violence Against Mannequins Erupts in Bahraini Malls*

Following the announcement of the possibility of increased advertising censorship dozens of mannequins in popular malls in Bahrain have been attacked and vandalized.

Local reports claim that most of the mannequins targeted were ones wearing lingerie and women’s underwear. 423 more words

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