Demà dilluns s’acaba el plaç per presentar alegacions a la proposta de nou POUM de l’actual equip de govern.

El tema es prou important com per perdre cinc minuts (o hores!) per mirar-se la documentació que l’ajuntament posa a disposició dels ciutadans a la pròpia web (www.castello.cat). I prou important, per fer un plantejament crític i preguntar-se si realment necessitem un POUM d’aquestes característiques o no.

El redactor d’aquestes línies ho té clar: aquest POUM no cobreix ni les necessitats d’aquest municipi, dels seus veïns, dels seus comerciants, del seu teixit associatiu, de les seves espectatives, del seu futur. Ans al contrari, es convertirà en una hipoteca per al nostre futur col.lectiu, i com a tal, és important deixar constància de la oposició a aquest POUM per escrit, no només a la barra d’un bar.

Per això, us convido a reflexionar, una vegada més, i a analitzar des del vostre punt de vista individual si necessitem creixement desmesurat, més pisos petits, més creixement urbanístic i més especulació, o si primer hem de fer un rentat de cara a Empuriabrava, dotar-la de les infraestructures que li faltin, i de créixer, ja en parlarem d’aquí uns anys…. O no.

En aquest sentit, podeu fer una ullada al nou blog de la Plataforma Antipoum, a l’enllaç següent  http://aturempoumcastelloempuriabrava.blogspot.com/ i conéixer un altre punt de vista. Gràcies pel vostre temps!

I’ve tried counting sheep, listening to music, watching a movie… You name it and it’s been done. As i lay in bed having given up all hope of even remotely snoozing, my cat struts into the room. The door creaks as she let’s herself in. I think to myself ‘yes! Ill give the cat some love and I should probably pass out.’

It begins with quietly calling her name. To which she replies with a lingering yowl and sits near the edge of my bed on the floor. I invite her repeatedly to come up for some love but the most she can muster is a squeak in my direction as she lifts her leg for some serious butt cleaning. Her blatant disregard for my calling puts me back into my hopeless roof watching as I listen to her lips smacking from across the mattress.

As heavy eyelids finally find me, my veritable moose of a cat leaps onto my bed and startles the crap out of me! She decided that it was now a good time to get loved on and proceeds to prance on my chest. I give in. I can’t help it. I reach up to start petting her and the motorboat is kicked into gear.

It’s now a challenge to keep her satisfied with the petting while trying to wean her off so I can sleep. She scoots up to my throat and begins making biscuits on my jugular as I wince with every stroke. Next, the waterworks begin. Not mine, mind you… Although I can see where you might assume it’s me while I lay entrapped by a petting-crazed beast at my throat with 10 razor-like weapons gently digging into my flesh with rhythmic strokes. But no. The waterworks I mention is the intense drooling Bitty does when she’s severely enjoying herself. She manages to let it drip in the perfect places. Such as my neck crease or ears. Sometimes she even gets it in my mouth as I yell for her to remove herself from my person.

As I roll around, my cat is treating it as a log rolling contest and successfully stays atop my highest peak throughout the turbulence. Once I get situated, the purring subsides and I drift off ever so slightly… only to be stabbed awake by an ever-persistent Bitty who decided at that very moment she needed to re-adjust. So begins the purring, biscuit making, and neck crease drooling. I decide at this point to remain still and pray she stops. I crack open my eyes to see what she’s doing and in the dim light of my alarm clock reading 3:24am, I see that I’m now covered partially with tail on my face. Disgusted that my cat has laid her butt on my face to sleep I unravel my arms from the comforter. As I’m reaching for her

Pfft. Ffft. Ft.

Did my cat just fart on my face!?

The undeniable smell of post-processed cat food makes me angrier than I probably should have gotten. As I flew into an upright position, Bitty flew off. It was as if she new she had just committed an awful crime. My bedroom door has never helped Bitty exit my room until tonight.

Oh for goodness sakes, now I’m going to giggle and give them that knowing look every time I hear a cell phone ring!

Tonight was the night! We knew it was coming. We knew it would be BIG! We just didn’t know exactly when it would come. After 6 very long days, baby G finally pooped her brains out tonight — an epic bowel movement by all accounts. As expected, it took a tag team effort to change this diaper and believe me, it was not for the faint of heart.

I think mommy and daddy were more relieved than baby G in the end. I mean seriously, can you imagine what that must have felt like…post-explosion? She must feel like a brand new baby girl — “all cleaned out,” as Grampie would say.

The question still remains…why? We might never know the answer, but if it happens again, we’ll make sure to have all hands on deck for that diaper change. And yes, we have a lot to be thankful for this Thanksgiving…a whoooooole lot!

Well, the name-calling has reached new levels in my home.  Not to mention creativity.  A few days ago, I put my children to bed.  I let them have ’sleepovers’ in my son’s double bed (he’s 9 and she’s 6) they think it’s a blast, it’s like a sleepover with a friend, almost.  so I’ve put them to bed and gone downstairs to do whatever needs to be done.  When I tucked them in I told them no noise, and yet, I hear my daughter start crying and calling me.

When I get to my son’s room, she is in tears and climbing out of the bed. “Ok, what’s going on?”

“He called me a ….(sniff sniff) he… he….called me a (sniff sniff-more for drama than anything this time)….butt crack.’

“What???” I looked at my son, and I knew it was true from the shit-eating grin on his face. “Why did you call her that?” more grinning and some weak excuse.

“Ok, well, let me tell you both right now, if I ever hear that again, someone is eating some soap.’

Then I removed my daughter to her bed, not only because of the name-calling but because I specifically told them no noise. which instantly caused more noise in the form of crying.  But oh well, it’s all about follow-thru, right?

Which leads me to a time when I was a child.  I dont’ remember who it was that said it, I just remember my parents telling us about it.  I have a brother 3 years younger.  Just like my children, we were friends one minute and mortal enemies the next.  I dont’ know the exact situation, but we were young, early elementary school.  And one called the other a “fart face f**k butt”.  Yep.  Can you imagine how hard it was for my parents to keep a straight face?  It was hard enough for me with ‘butt crack’, but with a four-letter word to boot?  OMG!  I don’t think I mentioned, but it was really hard for me to not laugh when my daughter looks at me all watery eyed and told my what my boy had said.  I can’t laugh, that’s encouraging a behavior that is not acceptable. But dammit, that was really creative!

• He who articulated it, particulated it.
• He who denied it, supplied it.
• He who refuted it, tooted it.
• He who rebuffed it, fluffed it.
• He who ____________ it, _____________ it.
• He who darted it, farted it.
• ??

The Sydney Morning Herald has reported that the unsettled stomach of a 120-kilogram pig was to blame for a fumy false alarm near Bendigo on Tuesday night.  Fifteen firefighters and two tankers rushed to respond to a report of a strong smell of gas after their pagers sent an alert about 10.30pm.

The area has been identified as one of the state’s most at-risk of bushfires and residents are able to use only bottled gas, thus increasing the risk of a blaze.  But when the crews arrived at the house in Axedale 10 minutes later, the source of the offending smell was clear.

“When we got to the property where (the smell) was, these people had a pig; a big sow which was about 20 metres away from the house,” CFA captain Peter Harkins told Radio 3AW.  “I don’t know what they were feeding this thing but we certainly heard it.”

Mr Harkins said firefighters had “done the right thing” in responding to the call.  “Everyone’s a little bit toey with the recent hot weather we’ve had up here so we responded as we normally do,” he said.  “All I can say is we followed through with our call.”

Mr Harkins said he had captained the rural brigade for “a number of years” but it was the first time they had been called to a farting pig.  “We did hose it down a little bit. It was a little bit on the nose,” he said.

Many eyes looked accusingly at Private Yoshimura as he tried to pretend he hadn’t broken wind …

So Phinn and I got a package today! (if you’ve ever seen leagaly blonde, there’s this part that I always think of whenever someone says they have a package) It was from our shop; thank you, Bock, for sending it! Phinn picked it up from the mail room and when i went to see him (to ensure that he was still breathing and had left his room at least once during the day) he said it: “I .. have a package.” (I giggled a little at that point) So he let me into his room and sure enough, he was still in sleeping type attire so I was glad that i went to visit him.

He had already opened the box and said that there were little boxes of Hickory Farms (man food fa sho!) and calenders. He showed me his calender. I got a little worried when it was a Hooters calender that had his name on it. My first thought was, “Great. I may have a PlayGirl calender or something in there.” They love to play jokes like that. As we both had the same thought, Phinn assured me that this was not the case because he had already checked. We both got very nice Hooters Girls Calenders. Oi vay. The photography is stunning.  Really. Top notch photo compositions throughout.

So then on my way back to my B-Hut, i thought, “Why were our names on them if they’re the same calender?” The question nagged me a bit but I put the thought out of my mind because tonight was my favorite night of the week: Rock Band Night. My band, Chocolate Broccoli, effing rocked as per usual. And as a special treat to all our fans, we did a fantastic cover of Queen’s “Fat Bottomed Girls”. A song that is one of my all time favorites because of it’s unequivocal awesomeness.

At any rate, when I returned to my humble abode, I unpacked “… the package” and, after drooling a little … over the Hickory Farms, I began to flip through the calender. By flip through, I mean I casually perused each and every square inch of that beautiful piece of glossy goodness. After a few minutes alone (ahem) moments, i reached that month that had been included in this years calender especially for me. March 2010. And the gorgeous Lauren from Grapevine, TX was there to greet me. She was showing how much she cared for the environment by hugging a palm tree. The best part (and the reason for the names) was that somehow, those crazy bastards from my shop had gotten Lauren from Grapevine, TX to sign on that month which was reserved for her honor with a nice message .. just for me!

Now, a gift from my shop would not be complete without the clever message she wrote. “XOXO Lauren. 2: Molly Wish you weren’t gay!!! jk. Come see me sexy!!” Obviously, they showed her my picture. Otherwise, she wouldn’t have requested my presence all the way in Grapevine, TX. And obviously, they told her how amazing I was with the ladies. Or she wouldn’t have said the whole gay thing. Oh, Lauren from Grapevine, TX. One day, I may have to let you down gently. But for now, XOXO right back at ya!

Lauren from Grapeville, TX

Oh, if only I had the same amazing powers to discover such wonders as this young woman has found here. The astonishing display of Google Powers remind me of this one SuperHero.

Chic and trendy clothes galore

Two very young designers are slowly conquering the fashion scene and are getting the nod of fashionistas in Metro Manila. With their avant-garde style of designing and wide insight of the fashion scene, these sisters are making raves in the industry. Lets know more about their store F*ART and find out why people are excited about their designs. We had a chat with Viva Andrada co owner of F*ART.
Rodel: How did you come up with the name?
Viva: Actually it came out from nowhere eh. Happy and I were just brainstorming for a name for the store. We wanted a name that would instantly register to people. An instant recall effect is what we want. We came up with a lot of names some were funny and some sounds corporate-like, that we didn’t want. Then it suddenly came to us that since what were doing is a fusion of art and fashion, we decided to play with the words art and fashion hence the name F*ART. Though it connotes something vulgar, that is not our intention, it’s just the recall on people we want.

The hosts with Viva Andrada

Rodel: Since both of you are still in your twenties how was it starting with your own business? Was it trial and error type of approach?
Viva: Right now were almost into our first year in business and so far were doing pretty well in terms of customer turn out. As you can see, we have lots of clothes here and to tell you honestly in less than 2 month most of this will be sold to our customers. Some customers would constantly come to our shop to ask us to design clothes for them. What’s really exciting with our work is the pleasure we give to satisfied customers. When we see smiles on their faces that definitely makes our work worthwhile. Looking back the first year was equally fulfilling and challenging for us. Of course there’s always struggle especially in a start up business like us. We just consider it as a challenge.

Rodel: When did you guys start conceptualizing this?
Viva: We’ve dreamed of this since we were still kids. We would talk a lot about clothes and fashion. We save money to buy clothes then we decorate it with accessories. We have this taste for colorful clothes. We would read fashion magazines so we would be updated with the latest styles. This passion for our work gives us the energy and creativity to create.

Rodel: Do you believe that the Filipinos can compete internationally?
Viva: Filipinos is slowly making their mark in the world of fashion internationally. Filipinos are naturally gifted eh. The only problem is that we just have to be given good breaks so that people worldwide would notice. Exposure is the key for us to be known. Artistically we can go head to head with other nationalities. Another thing is that Filipinos should support other Filipinos as well sino pa nga ba ang magtutulungan kundi tayo.

Actual interview with Viva

Rodel: What do you sell in your store?
Viva: Aside from clothes we also sell accessories like earrings, shoes and bags which we designed. These too are bestsellers especially among teens and partygoers. And we sell them in a very affordable prices that teens with even small allowances can afford to buy. We also do reconstruction of clothes that means we can redesign your shirts and pants in a style you want. We can accessorize it or paint a design on your clothes or pants.

F*ART logo

(Aired on Bread n Butter Episode 8, September 17,2008

Address: Kamuning Avenue

An Eye for fashion

Kitt:We definitley enjoyed discovering new and fashionable places and trying new cloth design especially those made by our Kababayans like Viva and Happy Andrada. Young as they are they are already an inspiration to countless Filipinos who is aspiring in making it big in the fashion industry. It is amazing how their creative minds come up with those higly fashionable clothing and accessories. The sisters will definitely make it big in the industry in the coming years.

Well hello, greetings, salutations, what’s crackin and the like!

It’s been a while hasn’t it?  About 5 months by my count, and I can count to potato!

But thanks to the hard working um….workers?  of webpress….I gots my account back.

Thank you Anthony….I love you…

*tugs nipple clamps*

So…let’s see…so everything is about the same….for the most part….except I am currently sans job and living with relatives.  Wait no, that’s the opposite of ‘the same’ isn’t it?  Well, I’m just a big barrel of FUCK YOU today aren’t I?

So, a short update since my last blog:  I didn’t go back to school, lost my apartment, wife was put in a hospital and got a dog!

I’ll elaborate more a little later on…

So there I am eating my cordon blue (say it with a french accent or don’t say it at all, thank you!) watching a college game at the chew hole. Wisconsin v. Northwestern. Normally, I do not enjoy college games because, quite frankly, they aren’t very good football players. Let’s be honest, though. Should they be? Eff no! They should be reading a book or studying math. College is for learning still, isn’t it? At any rate, it’s a running play and ol’ boy is really chugging along here … until it happened. This poor referee who is scrambling to vacate the area that will soon be occupied by this 250 pound bohemouth turns and, as he does, is cornered and blocked in by one of the defenders from the other team. Like a poor, defensless, little baby cow about to be turned into veal. Then, BAM! (SHWACK!, POW! .. Thank you, Bats) Ouch! Right to the chest. And the reff falls to the ground, snapping his head on the well trodden field of battle. I have never seen a bigger swarm gather so quickly as every other zebra stripe did to that poor old feller. As I said, not very good players if they rough up the referees. Am I right?

Yes, it has arrived. Honestly, I’m not sure how awesome this is really going to be but sometimes I have funny stories and such that I’d like to share with my world .. of friends. Anyway I hope this ends up as entertaining as Yankdizzle’s.

The other day I was standing in the hallway.

Picking up my things after church.

My husband acted like he hadn’t seen me in ten years,

And had just found me through a Google search.

It had really only been a few minutes, but to him, way too long.

He quickly got the look on his face, “I am going to fix what is wrong.”

He put his arms around me and gave me the biggest hug.

And all of the sudden it squeaked out, like a tiny little bug.

Sometimes you can stop those things, or at least hold them in.

But in this instance there was no turning back, the lion had left its den.

He hugged me so tight in the hallway, it  forced the mighty wind to blow.

But at least nobody was walking by to experience the smelly show.

I laughed as I hugged him back, whispering that he’d just made me fart.

And when he kept on hugging me, I knew he loved me with all of his heart.

There’s something about seeing your baby do something for the very first time that just makes you feel so proud. I’m not talking about big things here either, just the mundane actions or movements that we don’t pay much attention to. And even if the other parent saw it but not you, a part of you will still not believe it until you see it with your own eyes. I saw baby G yawn a couple of times today and I felt so privileged to see it. These small little actions seem to assure me more and more that yes this is real — she is a real person. Of course, this also puts me at ease to know her body is doing things that I do, which leads me to something else that apparently both my daughter and I do.

So while G’s mommy was talking to a friend, I was sitting down with baby G in my arms. One second, she was content, moving around a little, but being good. The next second, I hear a LOUD BURST! What went through my mind next was the following:

• 1 second after loud burst – “Hey! That sounded like…”
• 2 seconds after loud burst – “Nah, it couldn’t have been!”
• 3 seconds after loud burst – “Yup, she definitely just farted loud and hard enough to send vibrations up my arm”

Everyone farts…even babies. I knew that, but for some reason the whole event surprised the heck out of me. When you’re holding this little bundle of joy and she’s making cute baby noises and looking adorable, the last thing on your mind is the sound of a fart. Maybe that was a sign to expect the unexpected! Nonetheless, I’m still proud of baby G — proud of her first yawn and her first fart!

One of my friends was playing around with his keyboard and some effects it had, like looping drum beats and having laughter tied to the synth part.  He recorded it and sent it to me, just to show what he had done.  It seemed to be lacking something, so I forwarded it to D.J. Funky Dogg, who added some music effects to it, along with various sound effects and vocal utterances (plus some, uhh, other utterances).   It’s quite funny, if you find flatulence funny.  So I’m providing the download link for those who enjoy such things.  Just so you know, the file is about 1MB and the song is about 1 minute long.

First, a couple of disclaimers:

1) Obviously, if you are offended by the audible passing of gas, you should not download this free MP3.
2) If you are around people who can’t handle “potty humor”, you should listen on headphones.
3) If you are at work in a cubicle farm, go ahead and crank it up on your computer speakers — it’ll make everyone’s day a little more surreal.    (Though if folks think you’re uncouth, that’s yo’ problem!)
4) If you hurt yourself laughing, you don’t laugh often enough.  Subscribe to this blog and review the archives for help with that.
5) If you laugh at this, you can forward the link to this post to your friends who also appreciate this brand of humor.  That’s all we ask.

Okay, with that out of the way, here’s the link: Test Rekkerd (Stank Drawz Remix).mp3.

This track is released to the public “as is”, with no warranty expressed or implied.  It is also free, and you cannot claim it as your own and try to sell it.  If you do pirate this recording, we WILL find out and we’ll call J.G. Wentworfth to get our money NOW!

If you would like to have D.J. Funky Dogg remix your track, he is available for an exorbitant fee, although sometimes he will do things for us for fun (because we’re so cool and he diggs this blog), so you can send it to us via our contact form and we’ll see what happens.

It’s only a short story, but this made me chuckle.

Footballer Levi Foster was going to get sent off before the football match had even started, as he farted in the ref’s face whilst having his boots checked before kick off! He managed to beg the ref into changing it into just a caution, however both sides were in hysterics. I bet the ref didn’t see the funny side of it though, Levi claims he had ate a curry the night before!

Funnily enough, he went on to get the man of the match award after the game.

must have been the curry...

Source: http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/top-stories/2009/11/19/football-player-gets-booked-for-farting-in-the-ref-s-face-115875-21832846/

She’s a real huntress
When she farts, crowds run away
Our pitch black kitten

…and it hurt.

so earlier this morning jayan wedged himself between our floor mattress and the futon | his secret hiding spot | his favorite place on earth | but even tho he looked super snug | he cried cause he couldn’t roll over | so i pulled his legs and dragged him gently next to donna so he could find a comfort zone | and the rest of the story goes like this…

3:29 – turns his butt to donna’s face (pampers on, but pajamaless)
3:30 – <wet spattering sound with aftershocks>
3:31 – donna wakes up in her groggy voice – “oh man jayan.”
3:32 – i reply – “that didn’t sound right.”
3:32 – donna asks if i can wash him
3:38 – <sound of warm water crashing in the tub>
3:40 – “got a little bit on the towel but the deed is done”
3:41 – donna thanks me
3:50 – <wet spattering sound>
3:52 – donna undoes his diaper but nothing
3:55 – <wet spattering sound again>
3:56 – donna looks at me
3:56 – that one had “your turn” written all over it

“Did you hear Jayan last night? He was farting up a storm.” ~ Donnalyn Denina

so as i rush out of the shower to dry off this morning | i open the curtains to a half-awake butt-naked little boy being carried by his momma | donna said she noticed a puddle on his pillow and thought there was a leak in the ceiling | but when she continued to change his diapers | the second wave hit and my little fart ninja peed all over his face | it was probably the earliest i ever showered together with my son | he turns a hundred and ninety today