Sangama and Aneka invite you

to hear Susan Hawthorne in a lecture entitled (as her book is)

Wild Politics: Feminism, Globalisation and Bio/diversity

on

30th Nov. 2009 at Ashirwad 5 p.m

“Being a feminist requires optimism because the basis of feminism is a belief that things can change, that we are not entirely caught in a deterministic trap …“

Susan Hawthorne: Author, academic, activist, publisher, poet and performer.

will set out her new feminist cultural, ecological, and economic theory.

She draws on over three decades of feminist activism and theorising and looks at the tensions between globalisation and community, between disconnection and relationship and argues that the impact of globalisation on women has been disastrous

She unpacks structures of power and knowledge, law and international trade rules as well probes issues that intimately affect our daily lives

and suggests what we need is a new politics, one which puts biodiversity at the centre

In solidarity

Shubha and Manohar

La fundacin Axa de todo Corazón organiza un mercadillo solidario en el cual el 20% de beneficios irá destinado a la ONG Yamuna que trabaja en India y Madagascar para asegurar la integración familiar de los niños y adolescentes en situación de marginalidad, dotándoles de los medios necesarios para que gocen de una vida digna..
Axa de todo corazón es una asociación, creada con el fin de responder a las necesidades sociales existentes, tiene como objetivo colaborar con Asociaciones que se dedican a ayudar a discapacitados físicos y psíquicos, apoyo a la infancia, atención a los problemas derivados de la marginación social de nuestro entorno, fomentando su reinserción y tratando de paliar cualquier otra necesidad social de nuestra comunidad.

El evento tendrá lugar el Jueves 3 de Diciembre en las instalaciones de AXA en Sant Cugat del Valles.

CHARLOTTE NEWBERGER PRIZE FOR POETRY; Dec. 21 deadline; 100 lines max; $150 prize ; no entry fee

Info & entry here:  http://www.lilith.org/writers.htm 

So, I am aware that I have been rather over-emotional recently. This was evident when I started welling up at Hollyoaks last night. But during a Skype conversation with a good friend, I suddenly got very defensive. After showing him a picture of who I considered to be the weirdest looking couple ever, he decided to tell me what I needed. In his opinion, it wasn’t to get off Facebook and get a life, but a Good Man. You know, one who is good-looking, built, with a good job, who’ll look after me, and who, most importantly, isn’t a dick (the last point being a reference to my last boyfriend). I’m not sure what he wanted me to say to this.. maybe he was expecting a wistful  “ohhh, that’d be lovely”. But instead, I was suddenly overwhelmed with defensiveness.

For a while, I couldn’t work out why I was so insulted at the suggestion. I considered a variety of options: The first being, that the friend in question is one of those smug few, who have been with their girlfriend since they were 15. At the age of 22, he doesn’t know any other type of love, except the one he shares with her. This is great, I guess, if you’re lucky enough to find a relationship which grows with you. But it does leave the couple in question surrounded in an air of smug. The second possibility I explored, was the timing – after a year of being “on-off” with my ex boyfriend, we finally decided it was time to move on. I use the last part of that sentence loosely. Actually, HE decided it was time to move on, although didn’t have the balls to tell me. Instead, he let me assume that this was the case, leaving me to launch a full assault of interrogation over the internet (Facebook chat, no less. As he said, “this is a big convo for fb chat”).

I also checked the calendar, but it turns out that it’s not due to PMS.

So I soon realised that it was actually my inner feminist who was highly offended at the idea that all my problems were down to the lack of a Good Man in my life. I’m all for equal rights, but having studied all forms of feminism in a reasonable amount of depth, I came to the conclusion that I am not a feminist. However, I struggled to accept that all my problems would melt away as soon as I fell in love. For a start, why should I blame my shortcomings on the fact that I haven’t found anyone to settle down with? Secondly, in this day and age, why do I need a Good Man to take care of me? Can I not take care of myself? And for a finish, I’ve actually only just turned 21.

Instead of telling him how offended I was, I opted to bluntly inform him that I was a feminist. “In what way are you a feminist?” He seemed confused that I should make such a blaze remark, seeing that I have good personal hygiene and don’t wear dungarees. “I don’t need a male to make me whole”, I replied. Although as soon as I said this, I was instantly embarrassed. To save face, I blurted out “I’m lying, of course”. Although the response I got surprised me somewhat: “You shouldn’t be [lying]. I understand. You don’t need a boyfriend at the moment, but would like one in the long run to have kids, holidays, a house, to marry and to love.” No. You don’t understand. The above is not what life is about, and should it matter if ultimately I don’t get those things? Does that mean that I have failed in life?

Rather than broaching these questions with him, I decided it was best to keep my thoughts to myself, and finished the conversation with “ugh, I’m going to bed.” Articulate as ever.

• “Why Amurika is F*cked”- eight minutes and twenty-two seconds of youtube wtf interviews with people waiting in line at a Sarah Palin book signing
• In the UK a straight couple was denied a civil union because those are for the gays?
• Escalation in Afghanistan.
• “Dinosaurs are for Boys (Girls Allowed)“-  Sociological Images discussing androcentrism, “or the idea that boy things are good for everyone but girl things are only good for girls”
• On BPA in all our food packaging, how it’s effecting us, and who to contact to help stop it.
• Hillary Clinton and Obama in a caption-this-photo.
• Cats actually are evil.  I win.
• [Edit to include this sexist pig's shit:]  Glenn Beck is OK with a Beck-Palin 2012 ticket, but Palin-Beck 2012 is too rich- she should just get back in the kitchen where she belongs.

This list is short.  Sorry- most of what I’ve read this week wasn’t particularly share-worthy (imo) or filtered into my Google Reader at a time when I was just skimming.  Anyone have any links or stories to tell?

Also, hope everyone had a happy Thanksgiving =]

I have always, to some extent, always felt I was born in the wrong body. Sure, some things about being female-embodied are fun. Breasts, for example. It’s definitely nice to have these things. Although there are definitely days I would be happy to do without them, and I have always wished mine were smaller (even when they were, pre-baby). I like having them, but sometimes I wish I could keep them as accessories instead of permanently attached body parts.

However, there is one thing that I don’t think I will ever, ever get used to or learn to like. BLEEDING.

I hate it!

I have a friend who refers affectionately to this time of month as her “Moon Time,” and celebrates it by pampering herself with special teas and playing hooky from work. I have another who practices bellydancing (she calls it “Goddess Dance”), and claims that it has helped her feel much more strong and empowered during this transformative time in her cycle. I even know a lesbian couple that finds menstrual blood a turn-on and includes it in their sex play (something I will never, no matter how much you pay me, will do).

But I don’t get any of this romanticism of what to me, essentially just boils down to a homely, convalescent burp in my natural rhythms. I don’t understand it. I don’t want a cycle. I hate cycles. I hate watching my body change and do strange things I have no control of. I hate feeling the tides of lymph swelling up my tissues until my eyes look hung over and my pants don’t button. I hate staying up at night feeling tortured by cramps, upset stomach and nausea. I hate the ebbs and flows of breast sensitivity and weight. I don’t really get mood swings, but I get headaches and pain. I hate pain. And I really, really hate blood. In any form.

While I believe in a higher power, I am mystified by the existence of blood periods. I mean, couldn’t we women have been designed a little better? Why do we have to bleed? It’s so humiliating and degrading, to me. It’s not just some mysteriously enticing body secretion, it’s BLOOD: a bad-smelling substance that reminds us of violence, wounds, war—coming out of our vaginas, a part of our bodies that’s supposed to represent beauty, sensitivity and regenerative power. How undignified! How evocative of all the abuse and enslavement we’ve suffered over the aeons! It almost feels like something a really cruel man would invent as our ultimate humiliation. I mean, how would men feel if their penises bled regularly, and it hurt and made them feel ill? Would that make them feel manly? Is this really some kind of curse that we accepted, and never quite figured out… and learned to develop all kinds of romantic New Agey rationalizations for?

I don’t know. There are times I think that we women have punished ourselves by learning to bleed. What if we could teach our wombs to just chill out and stop producing that damn endometrium unless we actually were trying to conceive a child? I mean, do we need to be baby-ready 24/7? Is being a woman all about childbearing, anyway? To me, it is not. It is about a lot of things, but I think the idea of a woman’s body being eternally receptive to sperm seems instinctively wrong… like maybe we haven’t mastered some secrets of feminine biological power. (I also think it is possible for women to control conception without pills and artificial devices, just through the mind—but that’s a topic for another day.)

I’ve tried to accept the concept of bleeding, but the more I try, the more I just rebel against it. I don’t like calling periods “moon time.” It feels too complacent to me, too politically correct. There is nothing lovely and romantic to me about this time. To me, it’s just a PERIOD… kind of like detention. It’s a week out of each month—one quarter of my entire life—where I feel fat and achy, weak, and dirty. And for all of the old-school feminists of the world who find that last adjective offensive… let’s call a spade a spade. There is NOTHING CLEAN about menstrual flow. It’s blood mixed with mucous and pieces of the inside of your uterus, for crying out loud. Blood is what comes out of a raw steak. Blood is what comes out of someone when you knife them. Blood is what mosquitoes suck from our flesh. For exactly one quarter of our lives as childbearing women, we (biological women at least) have to sit around figuring out ways to clean blood off ourselves, and to avoid showing it to the world. There is no one that can tell me this isn’t gross—and somehow, just really, really wrong.

If it weren’t for my fondness for breasts and my revulsion toward surgery, I might have gone FTM a long time ago. And when I get a chance to pick out my next body, next time around I’ll probably return to a male form. Being a woman is so confusing to me on so many levels. There are some things I like about it—like the ability to cry, love boys freely, wear flowered shirts and be sensitive without being called a faggot—but so many more things I can do without. And bleeding is one of the biggest.

In the end, I just feel confused by femininity. I honor it, I respect it, but I feel so often like I’ve wandered into it as a tourist, and found that I’ve gotten into something that’s way over my head. And occasionally, I want out. Sometimes it’s hard for me to sort out what is true femininity—which to me, is POWERFUL—and the disease, the “curse” of female disempowerment that on affects nearly all double X-ers to some extent. There are days I could completely imagine living without breasts. There are other days I marvel at the fact that I’ve managed to bear and nurse a child. It feels so odd to think about this. I don’t want to do it again—once was enough. Even if I actually wanted a second child, which I don’t, I can’t imagine going through childbirth again. If being a woman is like a daily dose of culture shock to my brain, labor to me felt like being initiated into a secret society where you have to learn to eat worms and get tattooed by herds of fire ants. All I kept thinking during that experience was, “WT…F!!!!” It was strange… to put it mildly.
I don’t know if things will change once I hit menopause—that alone has its share of strange symptoms I am sure I won’t be thrilled about. I feel like what I dislike most about being a woman, is feeling my body is a usable commodity with an expiration date. A man is always a man, he is always the same, he is always manly at any age. A man can even improve with age. He is not stalled or even stopped in his tracks by the humiliations of blood and pain. He is not slowed down and weakened by pregnancies, nursing, hormonal fluctuations. He doesn’t have to focus on such gruesomely elemental concerns all the time. He can have one foot in the ether and one foot on the earth. For a woman, it is very hard to get that second foot out of the earth. Even if she never is able to bear a child, her body always taunts her with the prospect. Even if she never wants a child, she has to put up with this monthly bleeding. And if she does have a child, she cannot be left alone. She is weak and needs help and support.

I know it’s really not the feminist thing to do, criticizing our most sacred bodily function. But when I think about it instinctively, I just still feel like it is wrong, strange. And even if this suspicion of biological foul play ousts me from the inner circle of estrogen-worshipping goddess warriors, I’m going to be honest about it. I hate to bleed. And I question why a God who can create the aurora borealis, puppies and macadamia nuts couldn’t have figured this one out a little better.

And in my most painful moments, I occasionally wonder whether this was actually Her intention at all.

© Sarah Noack 2007

Robin’s article is here at American Thinker. (H/T ECM)

Excerpt:

Like for most feminists, it was a no-brainer for me to become a Democrat. Liberal men, not conservatives, were the ones devoted to women’s issues. They marched at my side in support of abortion rights. They were enthusiastic about women succeeding in the workplace.

[...]Then along came Sarah, and the attacks became particularly heinous. And I realized something even more chilling about the Left. Leftists not only sacrifice and disrespect women, but it’s far worse: many are perpetuators.

The Left’s behavior towards Palin is not politics as usual. By their laser-focus on her body and her sexuality, leftists are defiling her.

[...]The Left has declared war on Palin because she threatens their existence. Liberals need women dependent and scared so that women, like blacks, will vote Democrat.

And so the Left must try to destroy her. And they are doing this in the most malicious of ways: by symbolically raping her.

Just like a perpetuator, they dehumanize her by objectifying her body. They undress her with their eyes.

They turn her into a piece of ass.

Liberals do this by calling her a c__t, ogling her legs, demeaning her with names like “slutty flight attendant” and “Trailer Park Barbie,” and exposing her flesh on the cover of Newsweek.

And from Atlantic Magazine’s Andrew Sullivan “Sarah Palin’s vagina is the font of all evil in the galaxy.”

Nothing is off-limits, not actress Sandra Bernhard’s wish that Palin be gang-raped or the sexualization of Palin’s daughters.

As every woman knows, leering looks, lurid words, and veiled threats are intended to evoke terror. Sexual violence is a form of terrorism.

Read the whole thing.

Do conservatives oppose women?

Conservatives think that men and women should make good choices and do good things. That is why on this blog hardly a moment goes by without me praising women like Michele Bachmann, Marsha Blackburn, Jennifer Roback Morse and Trayce Hansen for making good choices and doing good things.

For example, here’s Michele Bachmann speaking out about National Adoption Day.

Adoption is a good thing. Conservatives support the choice to love and nurture vulnerable children. We don’t support the choice to kill an unborn person. Conservatives support good choices, and oppose bad choices.

asalaam aleikum

So my mom has been married to her husband for almost a year now. He’s quite lazy around the house. My mom cooks and cleans constantly and I will clean too. He does nothing, absolutley nothing. They both work jobs five days a week…sometimes my mom works more than he does. And since today is Thanksgiving she’s been cooking and cleaning non stop since yesterday. He  hasn’t offered to help, not once. All he has done is sit around and watch tv and eat. I don’t know if he holds old fashioned values…that it’s the womans job to cook and clean, or if he’s just lazy.

I didn’t realize I had feminist views until after my mom got re-married. It makes me so angry that he’s like this. I’ve noticed that he only does things that seem to be manly, such as taking out the garbage or carrying a peice of furniture from one part of the house to the other. I don’t like this at all. It bugs me that there are men out there that seem to think it’s the woman’s job to cook and clean and serve her man like she’s a maid or servant. I see no equality in that.

If I ever get married I will make sure it’s to a man that agrees to do equal housework and but also works and has no issue with me working also. If I later find out he’s not like that…divorce. I can’t be with someone that thinks certain things are “a woman’s job” and other things are “a man’s job”. Women can do the same things a man can do and vice versa.

So I guess I’m a Muslim feminist…is that ironic??

I’ve been writing a lot lately about women.  That’s because I generally write about what I’m experiencing.  While there’s certainly a lot to discuss about Beta v. Alpha traits in the workforce and normal social circles, without giving up too much information (I don’t want to piss off the matriarchy at my “gurl power” firm) I am going to write yet another post on the fairer sex.

I work with three teams of girls between the ages of 24 and 29.  I’m the department manager for two of the teams.  That means between work, lunch, soul-sucking Holiday parties, and mandatory community volunteering, I have personal contact with 19 women in that age group for at least 8 hours per day.

I listen to them drone on and on about their love lives or lack thereof – albeit for only a week or two at a time, since these girls can’t go two consecutive weeks without a man.

I never considered myself anti marriage until three years ago when I started working here.  The girls are all college educated, and come from a wide variety of backgrounds.  Their skill sets range from accounting to project management, sales and design…basically, the age, intelligence level, and background most men would consider attractive in the dating world.  By today’s standards, they truly are “good girls”.

Because of the line of work we’re in, none of them are fatties.  Every single one of them are cute to say the least, and several of them are just so fucking hot it hurts to look at them.

What started out with me working around these beautiful young girls, listening to them, watching them and thinking “That’s kind of shitty.  Oh well, that one’s just a little misguided” has slowly deteriorated into a true belief that today’s American girls are only worth the flesh they’re willing to give up.  If it wasn’t for the ever popular and easily obtained sport fucking, I wouldn’t even speak to an American girl.  Of course, this view has only been validated and reinforced by meeting their friends, having my own girlfriends, and making platonic girlfriends outside of work.  Mine is a pretty diverse and rather large sampling of American women in my opinion.

So here’s 15 of the top lessons I’ve learned from my experience with the “Average American Good Girl”.

1.  They don’t love you.  They’re in love with love.

Those doughy eyes that glow forth with a passion that could traverse the whole of space and time come as standard as seatbelts in a minivan.  It was already in them long before you walked into the picture.  You’re not special, you just happened to meet them when they had an opening.  They are determined to fall in love and be in love, and you simply fit the bill for now.  If they can get you to marry them, they win.  If not, they have yet another story of an immature man who was scared of commitment to bitch about.  Either way, they win.

2.  Billy Graham isn’t the only one who sings “Just As I Am”.

You must take her as she is.  Any due diligence, shit testing, or investigation on your part will be met with hostility most foul.  She is unique, special, more than you deserve, and altogether lovely.  You will take her just as she is, or you’re an inconsiderate immature asshole.  She’ll work on your numerous faults later, after you acknowledge this eternal truth.

3.  They think they’re smarter than you.

They know your faults, they know how much of a bitch your mom and sister are, and they know exactly what you should do about it.  They control the relationship, and you’re nothing but a pawn in their sick chess game.  Right now, the only game is to get you to commit forever.  After that, their unbridled wisdom will be granted to you on a daily basis and forcefully applied to every aspect of your life.

4.  Most of the time, they actually are smarter than you.

He may not always go down without a fight, but he usually goes down.  You wouldn’t believe the shit these girls get their guys to do.  Amazing, and sad.

5.  It is indeed your fault.

Every instance where she’s gone up against an Alpha with a backbone and lost (got hurt) is your fault, and you will pay greatly to ensure the remission of his sins.  Every argument is directly related to your lack of communication and understanding.  Even the 2% of arguments you think you’ve won are merely her granting you a win because of your stunted, ill man brain.

6.  There’s a difference between getting married and being married.

At a ratio of 1,000 to 1, I hear conversations about getting married versus actually being married.  She wants the party, the handsome groom, and all eyes on her.  She’ll have plenty of time to whip you into shape after the fact.  She owns your ass then, so married life should be a grand adventure for her and doesn’t require an ounce of thought from her pretty little head.  She can always leave you and take your kids and half your shit if it doesn’t work out.  So really, outdoing her bitch best friend’s ceremony and reception is all that matters.

7.  Sex is an important aspect of love…and lust…and boredom…and learning…and growing…and expression…and revenge…and power…and loneliness…and happiness…and sadness…and self validation…and tropical vacations…and down time between boyfriends…etc.

Need I say more?  Chances are your sweetheart is more than a few locker room stories.  I have learned that the “rule of 2”, which is dividing the partners a man claims by two, and multiplying the number the girl claims by two may not always hold true – many of them think they are still a virgin if they’re under 20 partners. However, I can certainly confirm that “blowjobs don’t count”.  So she may have “only” slept with 18 men, but that doesn’t account for all the dick that’s entered her body in one form or another.  Of course, you’d come closer to finding Jesus Christ in line for a Starbucks at the mall than you would finding out the truth about her cock intake by asking, so just listen for clues and form your own opinion.

8.  They show you off just as much as you show them off.

They don’t ask their friends “what do you think of him?” because they want an earnest opinion.  They ask because they want to make their girlfriends jealous.  If they don’t see the envy in their friend’s eyes, you’re gone, buddy.

9.  You will comply with her every wish, or you’re a selfish jerk.

50/50 partnership my ass.  Its her way or you’re out…once she has your replacement in her pocket, of course.

10.  Women give each other the worst dating advice imaginable.

I could write a book about the stupid shit I hear.  My favorite is that when you find a man who could be “the one”, hold out on him in the bedroom for three months.  Make him chase you for a while so that – and this is a direct quote – “he won’t think you’re trampy”.

11.  They lie.  My god, they lie.

The moment they feel something, it becomes truth.  The moment something no longer tickles their emotions, it becomes a falsehood.  They will lie, manipulate, and do whatever it takes to get what they want and honestly think nothing of it.  After all, it can’t be a lie or manipulation if they’re being true to themselves (thanks Oprah).  And as for how it affects the man, it matters not.  Remember, they’re smarter than you, and their growth benefits you too.  You should really thank her.

12.  They hate your single friends.

The most positive thing I’ve heard about a man’s single friends in my three years at that company is “he’s ok, I guess, but [boyfriend] needs to distance himself from him because he’s not going in the same direction we are”.  I could go on for ages with all the nasty things I’ve heard, and the plots to disassociate a man from a good friend he’s had since middle school.

13.  They hate their own friends.

As King of the world, I would ban women from talking about how aggressive and hateful men are.  Women are the most scheming, backbiting, twisted creatures on the planet.  They actually hate their friends and are overcome with jealousy when anything good happens to their peers.  I always have at least one trying to get the other fired…right before they go have their nails done together over lunch break.  This is really the only time I actually find myself afraid of women.  Their evil knows no bounds, and damn it, it scares me.

14.  They overvalue themselves.

Many women literally think that God Almighty himself stepped out of nowhere onto nothing and created the universe just for them.  They believe they are inimitable, distinctive creatures who should be referenced as a glowing and obvious example of all that a woman should be.  When they say “You’ll never find another woman like me!” they actually believe it wholeheartedly.  There is no one quite like them.  They are irreplaceable, and if you’re not smart enough to recognize it, you’ll undoubtedly live a life of solitude and regret before dying a lonely old man with no one to take care of him.

15.  Their perfect man will be greatly rewarded.  Then eaten.

From what I’ve seen, the poor Beta men who comply with this laundry list of horse shit are heroes and become the standard by which their girlfriend’s friends will judge their potential suitors.  But that only lasts for about two months until they get tired of his capitulating pansy ass and start longing for a real man to keep them in check.  Then they devour the Beta carcass and head out looking for an Alpha to treat them badly so they have something to bitch about again.

:a doctrine that advocates equal rights for women...

I don’t remember why this stuck with me specifically but I vividly recall my Humanities teacher, Katie Zonoff, laying out what it meant to be a feminist in laymen terms. In its most simple form to be a feminist is to believe that men and women should be treated equally and be afforded equal rights.  See, not so bad. You might have been lead to believe that feminism seeks to advance some super manipulative and hormonal ‘XX’ chromosome agenda or that you have to be a super butch lesbian to take any sort of interest in womens rights, but I’m here to tell you that it’s simply isn’t the case.  <–THAT is just something some asspinch macho man probably spouted after he thought you getting a little too uppity when you asked for equal pay for your equal work.  In actuality, feminism mainly focuses on gender equality and regression prevention on current issues.

• Equal pay for equal work
• Debates concerning Viagra being covered by insurance companies and birth control not being covered.
• Rape in some states being considered a pre existing condition for medical insurance
• Glass ceilings in the work place
• Asbestos in tampons
• Right to choice in matters concerning

Angela Davis: Black Feminist

Speaking specifically to those who look like me, black women, we happen to be especially important in the feminist movement. It has been said that the advancement of black women in America would be to the eventual freedom for all peoples.

“Black feminism argues that sexism, class oppression, and racism are inextricably bound together.[75] Forms of feminism that strive to overcome sexism and class oppression but ignore race can discriminate against many people, including women, through racial bias. The Combahee River Collective argued in 1974 that the liberation of black women entails freedom for all people, since it would require the end of racism, sexism, and class oppression.” {Information from Wikipedia}

It’s nearly midnight and I’m super jazzed about women’s rights. I hate when this happens (it’s not the first time, hah). My main point is that as a human race we’re so reluctant to attack gender inequalities for fear of being called a feminist. Well quite frankly I don’t give a damn what you call me. I’M A FEMINIST. I could only hope that anyone who reads this blog shrugs off the societal stereotypes, picks up the literal and figurative blood stained banner and joins the cause. GET ANGRY PEOPLE.

Daniel Charles
(via)

I’m going to keep this short and to the point.

Friday was Transgender Day of Remembrance and I attended the vigil in my area.  I had such an intense Thursday night, and got very little sleep going into Friday.  During the day on Friday, I had meeting after meeting and seriously didn’t now if I was even going to be able to muster up the energy to go to the event that evening.  I knew I would be something powerful, and since it was my first TDOR I figured I really did have to go.  I went home and grabbed my camera and went to meet up with some friends before heading over to the church.

I’m not sure if I purposefully distanced myself, but I went into complete photographer mode.  I didn’t really let myself process what was going on in front of me.  The service at the church was nice.  Completely non denominational, just a time for some community members to get up and speak.  After that, we lit candles and walked through Rita Hester’s neighborhood.  It was errie making that walk with all those people and all those candles.  It’s a walk I have made so many times, and I never thought about Rita or her death in combination with that

Brief descriptions of queerphobia, transphobia, racism, and violence follow.  Nothing too graphic.

I am queer by choice.  I am trans by choice.  I’m speaking for my experiences, and I know that some folks would like to argue with me about this.  I don’t mean to speak for anyone else.  I am interested in hearing others’ experiences, but I ask that others not speak for me.  A lot of people think of themselves as trans and queer genetically, or from birth, or socialization, or for a political statement, or that it doesn’t matter, and many other beautiful ways and reasons.  I affirm and honor others’ experiences, and I think that my experience of being queer and trans by choice are congruent and mutually affirming with others’ ways of being.

The world is built to pressure me into being a cisgendered straight woman.  As a person with white and normatively abled privilege, if I had continued to identify as a cisgendered woman and if I had identified as straight, my choices and identities would have been affirmed and upheld as natural, right, and true by my society and most of the people, cultural forms, and institutions I interacted with.  So, I do not have to be queer or trans.  If there is anything in this world I have to be, it is a cisgendered straight person.  I choose not to give in, not to concede to every pressure, every checkbox I don’t know how to fill in, every mispronoun, every street harassment.

I make the choice, against all of that violence and pressure, to be trans and to be queer.  That is sheer fighting bullheaded stubbornness.  Holy shit, that means I am really strong, to withstand a world that says I do not exist, or if I do exist, that I should not.  I am powerful, and I don’t give in.   Being queer and being trans is so beautiful and though it’s difficult, I feel blessed that I can choose to be who I am: is there anything else more wonderful?

My position as a trans and queer man is informed by my privileges, as a white, U.S.-born, normatively able-bodied person, and all of these things make it easier for me to be out, in comparison with a lot of other trans and queer people in the world.  Experiences of racism, colonialism, and ableism, among others, change the modes and probability of different kinds of queerphobic and transphobic violence, and I do not mean to say that my privileged position applies to all trans and queer peope.  I honor the needs and choices of people who are not out or who express their queerness in different ways, and I recognize their strength, as they work to survive.

Now, I know that a lot of queerphobic and transphobic rhetoric relies on queerness being a choice.  The argument goes,”Well, you choose to be queer or trans, so you should choose to be straight and cisgendered.”  A lot of counter-arguments  are based on the helplessness of queer people to control whether or not we turn out queer.  I have problems with that counter-argument, because it concedes the point: queerness is an affliction, but my goodness, we can’t help it, and so please let us continue existing.

My counterargument (and I’m plagiarizing a bit from my sister) is that yes, I choose to be queer every day.  Also, folks who think my choices should change can kindly fuck off.  I don’t go into their bedroom and attempt to convert them to the virtues of sodomy.  Now that I think of it, maybe someone should do that for them.

Story from the UK Daily Mail.

Excerpt:

Working women have long complained that their man doesn’t pull his weight on household chores.

But his lack of effort on the domestic front could actually be a myth created by his partner, researchers have found.

According to a major study, female breadwinners exaggerate their partner’s uselessness around the home because they feel guilty about devoting too much time to their career, and not enough to their role of wife and mother.

By nagging their man over his alleged shortcomings, women feel more feminine because they can control the traditionally female role of maintaining the home and family, experts say.

‘Working women who provide the majority of the household’s income continue to articulate themselves as the ones who “see” household messes and needs as a way to retain claim to an element of traditional female identity,’ said Dr Rebecca Meisenbach, professor of communication at Missouri University.

Dr Meisenbach questioned 15,000 American female breadwinners for the study, to be published in the journal Sex Roles this week.

I posted on a related topic recently, regarding a new study showing that children of working mothers live unhealthier lives.

A couple of years ago, after a trip to Costco, my mother came into my room and plopped a book down on my bed, “This was on sale, I thought you’d like it, it’s about vampires.” This book was big and black and had a person holding a shiny red apple on the cover. This book was Twilight. I looked it with much skepticism, wrinkled my nose, said “thank you” and put it on my shelf, never to be read.  As the fervor surrounding Twilight grew, the wrinkled in my nose got more pronounced and eventually turned into an eye roll followed by a mime of vomiting. I have no problem with the subject of vampires; I have no problem with chic-lit (I read lots of it with glee); I have no problem with frivolous reading, reading for fun or simply enjoying a book even though you know it’s garbage on toast. What I have a problem with is sexism and objectification and boy is Twilight full of it.

Originally, I crusaded against Twilight’s portrayal of Bella, a girl WHO LITERALLY CAN NOT LIVE WITHOUT A MAN. Seriously, he leaves and her whole world falls apart. Sure, their love for each other is romantic and heartwarming but her devotion to him must have Elizabeth Cady Staton spinning in her grave. I am not of the “Oprah Feminist” belief that men should wait on women hand and foot, nor am I one to scoff at women who choose to be house-mothers. What is important to me, what I think is the true message of feminism is the right for a woman to choose and be considered an equal of men. Bella doesn’t really seem to have a choice in all this, completely at the mercy of Edward’s whim. He leaves and comes back, decides what’s good and what’s bad for her.  She lives for Edward and Edward alone and when Edward leaves she falls apart because she has nothing else to live for. Is this really the kind of role model we want for thousands of young girls? I of course do not look down on the older set that reads this, I have many a friend who do, and I understand the appeal of the novel. My concern lies in the 12 year old demographic who aspire to BE Bella Swan, marry a man like Edward Cullen (have crazy, bruise causing sex and like it?) and pop out a strangely named child at 18. On one level, that is their choice, however uninformed.  On another it makes me cry.

Twilight is not just a setback for women, but also for men. Jacob is objectified just as much as Bella is, spending the majority of his time shirtless. Furthermore, he is a pawn in BELLA’S game, totally attached to her, hopelessly in love and completely used. As for Edward Cullen- lets just say there is a sparkly Edward Cullen dildo available for purchase on the internet (and you can put it in the freezer so it’s as cold and dead as him!). Interestingly enough, the second film (full of shirtless hunks) is directed by a man. The major complaint is that most film today is shot in the “male gaze” or from the male perspective (the white male perspective to be clear). This is the cause for slutty costumes, close-ups of breasts, male leads, the list of stereotypes continues. However, New Moon has a gaze that reeks of ‘the feminist gaze”- Jacobs lack of shirts for example (do they not HAVE those in werewolf land?).  To me, New Moon reeks of feminist stereotyping. A “this is what women like” kind of perspective, straight from the eyes of a  man. Telling us what we as females should like? Maybe. Reinforcing and proliferating female stereotypes? Maybe. Either way, there is too much objectification in this genre if you ask me.

And what does this have to say about Stephanie Meyer? Well, for one thing that woman can not write. As previously stated I have no desire to read her books, though I have glazed over passages out of curiosity. Forget the contrived plot, the wording has the depth and scope of a sixteen year old’s. This is literally one womans fantasy thrown up on paper and a blatant symbol of her indoctrination into the male hegemony. Reading the books for escapist fun is one thing but when they become an entire franchise, take over multiple nations, and preach sexism (of both men and women) to young impressionable girls (who need someone to explain that this is a FAIRY TALE, not a work of fiction), I have a problem. At least everyone is equally shallow- talk about equality for all.

I totally hope I don’t lose friends over this.

Nu är det så att vi (jag och rösterna) har ett stort avslöjande att komma med. Efter hårt slit och ett enormt grävande så kan vi här på DGsworld stolt avslöja att:

FOKI DISKRIMINERAR MÄN

Såhär ligger det till. För några dagar sedan så annonserade Foki ut att hon hade en tävling, där man kunde vinna en iPhone.  Inga konstigheter så långt.  eftersom jag är lite kåt på en sådan så ställde jag naturligt vis upp (i undersökande syfte naturligtvis).  Och sedan idag, så fick vi reda på vilka som vann.  Till min stora förvåning så var det 4 tjejer som vann :O

Av ca 4000 som tävlade så var alla vinnarna utrustade med bröst, hmm… Det börjar lukta feminist här.  När vi sedan tänker på att iPhone faktiskt är en teknisk advancerad pryl, och tja medeltjejen kan på sin höjd starta en dator…  Som enda killen i tävlingen borde jag vara en automatisk vinnare, men icke. Därmed är det vetenskapligt bevisat att Foki är femininst.

So an old friend of mine and I were having a lively discussion about abortion.  And this friend of mine is PRO LIFE, I capitalize this because this person gives no leeway for rape, incest or the life of the mother:  God’s will is God’s will.  I hope that abortion ends, not because I want Rowe v Wade overturned but because I hope the need for abortion ends.  I have always seen that taking that choice away from women would relegate us back to second class citizens who’s only role in society would be that of child bearer.  Then I began listening to his argument about how a lot of these procedures really do endanger women, and that the pill makes women more of a sexual object because we can be more sexual without fear of consequences to the man.

I then found this article, here’s the link http://serendip.brynmawr.edu/exchange/node/1845 and it has a very candid discussion about both sides of this feminist argument.  Taking out the moral implications of the fetus, whether it is alive or not, it seems to be that abortion, and the pill, and all that really does seem to serve a patriarchal society.  For a woman to compete in the workforce she cannot have children.  Companies put up this glass ceiling for women with children.  That’s why the pill seems so liberating, because a woman can wait to have children, and have a career.  But here’s the thing, when she is at the high place there is no room for her to take sick days for her child.  The man’s expectations about work still applies.  And with sex, children are seen as inconveniences to the man, that they aren’t ready for them, so women take these pills to not inconvenience the man.  It seems to me that the society we live in today takes away the one thing that makes women special and relegates it to “an accident” or a “mistake,” and that’s childbirth.  Women should be fighting together to help our situation in the workforce, open up doors for mother’s and wives and fighting through that glass ceiling as opposed to our great gift to this earth being labeled an accident.