San Francisco, CA
December 1, 2009

Approximately one year ago, Fleshlight introduced a signature Tera Patrick mold in their Fleshlight Girls line-up.  The amount of foot traffic around their booth at AEE 2009 was a sign of the wild success of the mold which also included an appearance from the iconic porn star.  In the past twelve months, Fleshlight has been busy molding some of the most well-known porn stars of the past decade.  The success of Fleshlight can be attributed to their high quality product and savvy business marketing and star power.  This past year, Fleshlight has introduced a mountain of new pussy molds and toys to keep us shooting loads well until next year.  Their newest molds include: Teagan Presley, Jenna Haze, Jesse Jane, and Eva Angelina (finally!).  If you have previously purchased a Fleshlight, most, if not all, are available to purchase as sleeves which saves you a $20.00 bill.  In addition, they have also introduced a new sex-toy-in-a-can product line-up.  Stock up on your stocking stuffers for the pervert in your life!

http://blog.mywetmonkey.com/

#1 Sex Toy of 2008 by sex expert Sue Johanson. The We-Vibe is a brand new adult lifestyle luxury product from Standard Innovation Corp. This sleek and sexy toy offers a new dimension in intimate pleasure. Not only does it function as a g-spot and clitoral stimulator, but can also be worn DURING penetration (with another toy or partner!).

Incredibly flexible, durable, and powerful, the dual, rechargeable motors have two speeds and are covered in medical grade silicone.

Fleshlight Offers – Sex In A Can – Succu Dry — hmm, interesting… 

Succu Dry’s unique Vampire mouth opening isn’t for the faint of heart. This exclusive Undead pale sleeve color is made from the same patented Real Feel Super Skin material that’s made Fleshlight the #1 selling male sex toy in the world. The amazingly detailed vampire mouth and fangs beg you to drive your wooden stake deep inside.

To ensure an experience all its own, Fleshlight developed a brand new inner texture for the Succu Dry called “The Fang.” This intensely stimulating texture has dozens of tiny fangs that will gently bite at you until you’re drained of every last drop. Quench your lust and prepare for the ultimate vampire fantasy, but beware, this can will suck you dry!

Eva Angelina Fleshlight Sleeves Now Available!

 

Eva Angelina - The Newest Fleshlight Girl – Get Her Now!

Eva Angelina – Lotus

Fleshlight and Skinworxxx Pictures are proud to offer the Lotus-textured Eva Angelina Fleshlight. The award-winning star of “Deviance”, “Upload”, and “Se7en Deadly Sins” is reporting for active duty to show her gratitude to the bravest, toughest and hardest amongst us. Your order includes a unique Pearlescent Fleshlight Case, autographed postcard and free 2-ounce bottle of Gun Oil H2O (water-based personal lubricant).

Click Here to see more of Eva Angelina!

Don’t Run with Scissors.

Recognized for her girl-next-door innocence and radiant sensuality, the lovely and fresh-faced Adam & Eve Pictures contract star Bree Olson will be cutting the ribbon to launch AVN Adult Entertainment Expo 2010! The ribbon cutting will take place at 10:00 a.m. on Thursday, January 7, 2010 in the front of Hall A.

Quote:

“If you, Jenna Jameson, aren’t a professional with oral sex, then who is?” – Oprah

“I wanted to be the number one porn star in the world. And I wanted to do it with dignity.” – Jenna Jameson

“I changed the industry for up and coming starlets.”  – Jenna Jameson

“We sell the movies. Women need to know they are an asset and they are the ones who should be making the money.” – Jenna Jameson

“Nobody wants to work with somebody who isn’t able to ‘do their job’” (context: get it up) – Jenna Jameson

“In the beginning it was new, it was fresh. I was young. I was crazy. Then, I ended up not really liking it, not having that connection… feeling kind of weird about it.” -Jenna Jameson

“I wanted it to be big…and massive.” – Jameson on her kitchen

“The BIG moment.” (erection) – Oprah

“When I very first started the adult films, the most important thing was having a boob job.” – Jameson

“You’d be really surprised how open women are with me. ‘The very first [thing] out of their mouths is, ‘You taught me how to give oral sex, and my husband thanks you.’” – Jameson

“It is a nonstop monstraziation  of your body.” – Jameson on mainting your looks as a porn star

“I never live my life with any kind of regret, but there are a few nights I lay my head down and I wonder if I made the right decisions.” – Jameson

“I know how incredibly capable I am.” – Jameson

“I knew I had a lot of options … but I knew that I was going to make a lot of money.” – Jameson

“That’s a big misconception about me in the industry. They think, ‘Oh, she’s had thousands of partners. She’s a slut. She’s a whore’. But in actuality, I had sex with my husband most of the time, and I think that that’s why my movies sell so well. You can see love.” -Jenna Jameson

“I loved the movie The Secretary.” – Jameson

Source:

Small Screen Scoop.com

Spankz and the crew will be attending the 2010 AEE.  Keep an eye out, we’ll be swinging from the rafters!

The AVN Adult Entertainment Expo (AEE) is the largest event for the adult industry in North America. If you are involved in anything ‘adult’ and want to sell or buy….this is the event for you! Close to 25,000 attendees and over 350 exhibiting companies make this show a must attend! Offering four full days to wheel and deal, you’ll find the most comprehensive collection of exhibitors covering virtually every market segment in the adult entertainment industry. This is your chance to see the latest industry developments, conduct your business and network among the best of the best.

Sponsored by AVN Magazine, the undisputed, premier trade publication for the adult entertainment industry and a segment of the AVN Media Network, AEE is the only adult-oriented trade show to capture the excitement and dynamics of the adult industry, encompassing all links in the business chain – from manufacturers, distributors, retailers – to the hottest adult stars and enthusiastic fans!

Spankz The Monkey

Spankz the Monkey is the suave and cool personality behind My Wet Monkey.  Spankz is the ‘Mayor’ of Jabooty, a fun and sassy adult social network (coming soon).  He is always chasing the proverbial warm cherry pie and always falling just short of getting it.  His Travels take him around the globe and he always has a story to tell or a lesson learned to share.  Spankz is always willing to hear your confessions and offer up all types of advice.

With all these (stupid piece of shit) movies like Twilight coming out, it’s no surprise to me that the sex toy industry would be trying to get into that market. One of the most promising new toys that came out (har har) is the Succu Dry by Fleshlight. This product will complete all of your vampire desires and can be your own little secret because of its soda can disguise. So for all you True Blood fans, go out and start fucking vampires! Or just vampire sex toys shaped like cans.

For those who don’t know much about this Fleshlight product, I would try checking out their website or read this funny review of their other products from Gizmodo.

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Breast Feeding Baby Toy

And On The Seventh Day God Created… Sex Toys?

Matagal ko nang nakikita ‘tong ad na ‘to sa internet nung late 90’s. Pero dahil hindi naman ako sigurado kung ano yun at bata pa ako at walang credit card, di ko ito pinapansin until last month.

May napuntahan akong website, isang online community para sa mga PLU and pinaguusapan nila kung saan pwede makabili ng Fleshlight sa Pinas. Pinaguusapan din nila kung saan pwede makabili ng mura pero original na Fleshlight. Dahil nacurious ako kung anong meron ang Fleshlight, kinonsulta ko si Pareng Google kung saan pwede makabili dito sa kinalalagyan kong lugar at syempapers, di ako binigo ng kumpare ko at ito ang nakuha kong info:

Fleshlight 101

Fleshlight dahil parang “flesh” yung feel nung laruan at mukha namang flashlight ang case nito. Kaya Fleshlight. O ha, bright kid kung sino man ang naka-imbento ng pangalan nito. Star Margarine baby siguro siya.

Isang adult male masturbation sex toy ang Fleshlight. Sa mas malaswang salita, isa s’yang laruan na ginagamit sa pagsasalsal para mas maging exciting ang jakol experience ng isang lalaki. Haha. Nasa 10 inches ang haba at nasa 4 inches naman ang diameter ng Fleshlight (kaya ‘wag kang epal kung sasabihin mong baka hindi kumasya ang etits mo sa Fleshlight). Syempre, bago mo ipasok ang pututoy mo sa Fleshlight kailangan ng konting preparasyon para sa mas masarap na pagtitikol.

Step 1:Tanggalin ang sleeve (yung “flesh” part) sa case.

Step 2: Ibabad ng 5-10min sa maligamgam ng tubig ang sleeve.

Step 3: Ibalik ang sleeve sa case.

Step 4: Lagyan ng water-based lube ang bukana (kung saan papasok si Junjun) ng sleeve pati na rin si Junjun para walang sabit ang bawat kadyot. Nyahaha.

Step 5: Ipikit ang mata at simulang imaginin ang kung ano mang nagpapatigas sa titi mo. Paghimas at pagkurot sa utong ay optional.

Maraming klase ang Fleshlight. Sa kulay pa lang, tatlo na agad ang pagpipilian mo: Pink, Mocha (brown… mala-mulatto) at Ice (translucent… parang si Invisibleman ang tinitira mo).

Syempre meron ding design ang pasukan (orifice) ng etits ng Fleshlight para mas realistic: Lady (kipay ng babae), Mouth, Butt at Stealth (para lang syang hati na pwedeng pasukin… para mas discreet daw).

Syempre para mas exciting, may iba’t ibang design din ang pinaka lagusan ng etits mo: Original (smooth canal, 3/4″ in diameter ang lagusan ng etits), Ultra Tight (smooth canal, 1/4″ in diameter ang lagusan ng etits), Super Tight (smooth canal, 1/2″ in diameter ang lagusan ng etits), Wonderwave (may mga textured waves sa canal, 1/2″ in diameter ang lagusan ng etits), Speedbump (may mga maliliit na massaging beads sa canal, 1/2″ in diameter ang lagusan ng etits), Super Ribbed (mas pino ang mga textured waves, 1/2″ in diameter ang lagusan ng etits) at Vortex (spiraled canal, 1/4″ – 3/4″ in diameter ang lagusan ng etits),

Mukhang ayos naman ang mga nalaman ko sa laruan na ‘to kaya nilabas ko ang etits ko credit card ko at ready to buy na. Nilagay ko ang mga detalye ng credit card ko sa online shop at ang delivery address. Fleshlight Butt Ice ang pinili kong bilhin.

Kinabukasan, na-i-deliver na agad yung bago kong laruan. Syempre, binuksan ko agad yung package at binusisi yung item habang nanginginig ang aking kalamnan.

Exciting! May kasama pang manual kung papaano aalagaan ang Fleshlight ko at may libre pang lube!

Kung anong adventures ang nangyari sa amin ng Fleshlight ko nung kinagabihan… Hhhmmm… Sa amin na lang yun (unless pipilitin n’yo akong magkwento, madali naman akong kausap, y’know…) basta, nanghina ang tuhod ko pagkatapos. Nyahahay!

Si Mariang Palad, the safest sex known to mankind, ay na-Double Up na!

Take a look at some of the action from the 2009 AEE!

Brought to you by AVN Media Network:

Eva Angelina – The Newest Fleshlight Girl – Pre Launching Now… It Has Launched!
  

Eva Angelina (born on March 14, 1985 in Orange County, California) is an American pornographic actress and adult model. She began her career at 18 and is known for performances in a wide variety of genres, including gonzo, and for wearing glasses when performing. She won several industry awards in 2007 and 2008, including the 2008 AVN Award for Best Actress (Video).

Angelina is of Cuban, Chinese, and Irish descent. She has said that she came from a “very wealthy” background, but that when she turned thirteen, her family “pretty much lost everything”. She entered the porn industry by answering an advertisement in the newspapers; her first scene was for the Shane’s World series.

Angelina is known for wearing glasses during sex. She had said on film shoots she gets sent home to get them if she forgets to bring them with her, and during a visit to one AVN Awards show she wasn’t recognized as she wasn’t wearing her glasses.

She took a temporary break from porn between May and November 2004 to accommodate her then boyfriend’s wishes, during which she returned to school and worked at Macaroni Grill in Valencia, California. Angelina soon after returned to adult films. In late 2005 Eva considered joining the US Navy but never did.

Angelina married pornographic actor Danny Mountain in December 2007. She gave birth to their daughter Silvi on December 9, 2008.

No, this isn’t a joke!  This is a symbolism of our commitment to bring you the highest level of products and services to be found in this industry.  My Wet Monkey is dedicated to servicing all walks of life and we have a wide range of products to MEET EVERY-ONES NEEDS.  Check out this flagship model in our line-up and let your fantasies run wild.  Spanks is confident that he has something to meet all your requirements.

NEZ is an elegant and luxurious pleasure object with an energetic buzz, crafted in stainless steel or 18K gold-plate. The metal, enticing and evocative against the naked skin, offers exciting prospects for users inclined to the sensual utilisation of hot or cold. Five pre-programmed stimulation modes and a virtually silent vibrator engine provide the basis for a multitude of enjoyable experiences. Her petite frame ensures discreet yet reassuring company, eager to sate daily desires.

INEZ is rechargeable and a 2-hour charge provides up to 4 hours of bliss. Comes presented in an elegant wooden gift box, accessorised with charger, manual, satin pouch for stylish storage and a 1-year LELO warranty

Find this device and others at ALL PRICE POINTS:

mywetmonkey.com

Jesse Jane Fleshlight Sleeves Available

 

Exclusive Digital Playground contract girl Jesse Jane is now even more accessible to fans with the November 2 launch of her Fleshlight sex toy.  The acclaimed star of bestselling Digital Playground movies Pirates II: Stagnetti’s Revenge and Teachers partnered with Fleshlight to mold an exact replica of her famously tight pussy using their patented technology.  Jesse Jane is the #1 adult star in the world, while Fleshlight is the #1 selling male sex toy in the world–a perfect combination.

“We are thrilled to add a superstar of Jesse Jane’s caliber to the Fleshlight Girls experience,” remarks Steve Shubin, Fleshlight creator and CEO of ILF Inc.  “We predict this being one of our biggest launches to date, with both consumer and wholesale demand mounting steadily in anticipation of the launch.”

“I jumped at the chance to work with a sex toy company the caliber of Fleshlight,” says Jesse Jane.  “With a great product, they’ve managed to successfully turn sex toys for men into a mainstream concept.  I get so wet thinking about all the guys that are going to fuck my Fleshlight every night while watching one of my Digital Playground movies!”

Fleshlight’s soft, pliable Real Feel Super Skin masturbation sleeves are made from a patented, high-quality material designed to replicate the sensation of penetrative sex.  The molded sleeve comes housed in an attractive and sturdy canister that resembles an ordinary flashlight, allowing for discreet storage.  It’s easy to use, clean, and 100% safe.  With proper care and usage, a Fleshlight product will give a lifetime of enjoyment.

Ladies and Gentlemen please allow me to introduce to you the Fleshlight.

Designed by a former police officer (and SWAT team member) Steven A. Shubin, who was going through forced abstinence while his wife was in a high-risk pregnancy. Let’s just say he discovered a great way to pass those long sexually frustrating nights. And for this wonderful invention was granted a patent in 1998 as a “device for discreet sperm collection”.

Made to look like an oversized flashlight this not so discreet wonder is the sole basis for many a man’s dream come true.

Just what makes this “The” perfect playmate? It would have to be the innovative material used for the inside sleeve. This not only feels like the real thing, for many of our customers, its better. The insert is not made from latex, plastic or silicone and the Fleshlight FAQ from their website claims the material is “a company secret covered by a series of US patents. So mum is the word on this one.

Available now at Honey’s Place! For a price please contact your sales rep today. Remember that they are the #1 selling Male masturbator of all time! So get them while you can, supplies are limited!

Jesse Jane – Fleshlight Girl – The Newest Addition

Jesse Jane is the newest Fleshlight Girl! Added today! The sleeve color is brand new also… Realistic Flesh Tone

Happy Find… Man Up Your Girly Boy This Halloween

Courtesy of the Onion News Network comes this gem.  What I like best is the part where they’re mean to the kids…

In My Brain While Sleeping… A Costume I Never Would Have Thought Of While Awake

Blah blah blah subconscious something something weird dream… I met a man wearing this costume and when I inquired about it, he pulled granite from his pocket, placed it on the last stair and said:

"I'm Rock Bottom."

Drunken Recollection… Two Gorillas Are Better Than One

My cousin Steve and I have matching costumes.  We debuted them last week at my brother’s party.  It was a blast.  The next day, I had another party to attend, but I opted to go as Hipster Jesus.  Another gorilla was there, and my heart broke a little…

Musical Musings…  How Do You Kill The Gill Man?

Is this a good song? No.  But does the Monster Mash really deserve being the only Halloween song? (Not counting Werewolf Bar Mitzvah, of course.)

(Lyrics available after the jump)

Awful Battle… Worst Halloween Costumes

Take your pick of this litter.  And by litter, I mean trash.  Not like litter of puppies or litter of kittens.  (BTW, they all win the Awful Battle.

InASense, Lost… This Sex Toy Bites

Ever hear of the Fleshlight?  Well here’s the Succu-Dry.  And it blows.

Do Not Vant

Coinkydink Or Coinkydonk? Did PB Max Get “Discontinued” For Peanut Butter Twix?

PB Max... PB Twix... hmm...

I loved PB Max almost instantly when it was released in 1990.  It was the companion candy to the caramel Twix bars I’d eat everyday.  (There was a 5¢ mail-in rebate deal on each wrapper, so I binged one summer, sent them all in, and received a $5 check 6-8 weeks later.  You can do the math.)

Anysweettooth, seemingly as quickly as the candy burst on the scene, by th mid-90’s, it was gone.  A couple more years passed and all-of-the-sudden there was a Peanut Butter Twix bar (and the original became Caramel Twix with a capital-C, as you candy C see).

There were claims that the PB Max didn’t make it because the Mars family hated peanut butter.  But lo and behold, they eventually made and continue to make the spin-off to their double-cookie-bar-covered-in-something-coated-in-chocolate classic.

Hibbidy-Wah?! What’s Wrong With This Kid?

The Shit To Just Shitty… The Adventure Of It All

Whatever happened to all the razor blades in apples and the kidnappings?  The night’s supposed to be scary for kids.  It’s like a PG-13 horror film these days.

Worth 1002 Words… My Old Halloween Costume Edition

Boxing Match

(lyrics to Halloween Survival Guide, you know, in case your ears aren’t working)

“Halloween Survival Guide”

written by: The Road

David:
Pop quiz!

Shane & Kent:
Pop quiz?

David:
Pop quiz, hotshot!

Shane:
Say what?

Kent:
Say what?

David:
Pop quiz, hotshot!

How do you kill Dracula? (Wooden stake!)
How do you kill the Wolfman? (Silver bullets!)
How do you kill zombies? (Head trauma!)

How do you kill the ghost? (Exorcism!)
How do you kill Frankenstein? (With fire!)
How do you kill the Mummy? (Brendan Fraser!)

So much better than Van Helsing
So much better than Van Helsing
So much better than Van Helsing
So much better than Van Helsing!

How do you kill witches? (Spring water!)
How do you kill Krueger? (Stay awake!)
How do you kill the Gill Man? (Um…)

Run him over!

So much better than Van Helsing
So much better than Van Helsing
So much better than Van Helsing
So much better than Van Helsing!

Apparently somebody came up with an extra naughty Halloween trick or treat that really sucks.  It looke like a kind of rubber vampire mouth.

Sucking vampire

They call it a Fleshlight.

Sex in a can.  Better than sex in the can…I guess

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