130 Miles from Iowa, USA – Big Earl’s clubs in Iowa are putting a new spin on Thanksgiving stuffing, with a new twist on the big, beautiful woman scene and Tony Batman and Schevelle will be your master and mistress of ceremonies for the big event.

Friday, November 27 and Saturday, November 28, 2009, there will be no fluff as plus-size dancers take to the stage at Big Earl’s locations in Des Moines and Davenport, competing for the chance to win a $1000 prize.

Batman is looking forward to the event, “Friday we will hold the contest for the Des Moines ladies, then we move to Davenport for the second contest. This is going to be a huge event and Schevelle and I are happy to be invited. I stole this gig from my buddy, Ron Jeremy and I think he’s going to envy me the experience of a lifetime this presents. . . Kidding Ron!

“Seriously though, this is a great opportunity for girls that have wanted to dance, but didn’t think they could fit into the showgirl mold to start building experience and a following. Schevelle and I will be giving the entrants our full support during these two contests and I think Big Earl’s has a great idea in opening up to the BBW girls and their fans.”

This dynamic duo isn’t going to let the opportunity to spread good will end with the contests, and plan something more. “Tony and I are going to spend our day on Thanksgiving volunteering at a shelter, dishing up meals for people that otherwise wouldn’t have a Thanksgiving of their own,” said Schevelle.

Batman agrees, “Yes, we are doing some good works for our holiday weekend. Schevelle and I are scheduled for interviews with WGGO Classic Rock with Clutch, Kiss 107.5 and Lazer 103.3, where we will not only talk about the contests and our travels on the show circuit, but also about voluntarism. We are very happy that we have gotten so much coverage for our time here. In Iowa, three radio stations interviewing us is pretty much a media blitz!”

Big Earl’s Goldmine is located at 4745 NW 2nd Avenue in Des Moines. Phone 515-237-9902. Big Earl’s Amsterdam is at 643 East 59th in Davenport, Iowa. Phone 563-468-4653.

Read more of Batman and Schevelle’s travel logs at www.tonybatman.com.

Here is me and my mum with our much improved cossack hats, I saw some really fluffy ones in River Island this week and would love to make on with a pile that is at least 4 inches deep. Im sure i could make them for less than £29.99.

I think they have worked really well and i have even got an order, courtesy of mum of course, just need to find some Brown fur fabric.

Well, there were good times and bad times. The grad school ended up taking all the profit, because they apparently were under the impression that I was “donating” the cupcakes.

That’s okay though, because Cakeybake cupcakes did end up selling out, within just an hour of setting up! So, success on the purchasing part, fail on the bank account!

Here are some pics of the baking and the ingredients I used.

This is high quality stuff right here.

I like to use brown cage free eggs because I personally feel like they taste better. They are a tiny bit more expensive, but at Bruno’s or Publix it is usually only 2.50$ for 12 eggs.

I only use Pure Vanilla extract, and to be honest I don’t feel like the brand makes that big of a difference, but the fact that it is 100% Pure Vanilla Extract can make or break the cakes AND the frosting.

Never put your flour and sugar in first.

I personally like to have the butter melted, not just softened, when I am making frosting. I think it creates a smoother effect. Surely fancy pastry chefs will disagree, but just put my cupcake in your mouth and be happy.

One rule I ALWAYS follow is to put wet ingredients in your mixture first. I also like to bake in small batches at a time to find out exactly how many small batches it takes to make the perfect amount. This way there is never a ridiculous waste of ingredients. I find that three small batches of frosting puts a nice amount on each cake for a dozen.

This was actually a learning experience for me, because I was unhappy with the amount that two batches of frosting yielded for the cakes.

Nice, light and fluffy

The first batch and second batch of cakes came out perfect. Unfortunately, the chocolate batch of cakes was a wee bit dry for my taste, but because of the time constraint, I had to finish up. I’ll know for next time to check twice every time!

All in all this was a good learning experience. It was my first bake sale and the pressure got to me a little, especially when I found out I was not going to make my money back.

Alas, the baking will go on!

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The once peaceful Kitten Island is being invaded by creatures from another world! These pesky aliens have set up traps loaded with tempting kitten goodies. Free trapped kittens using your creative matching skills. Use the goodies you acquire from the traps to keep your rescued kittens happy or they may just wander off and get captured again! Your kittens will love the food, drink and warmth you provide for them… rescue your first kitten today!

It Takes Just A second To Say Thanks,

It Takes Longer To The Work On This.

Kitten Sanctuary

Hai, service goodz here?

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1.  Cleaning

2.  Keening

3.  Meaning

Our Family Activity this morning was cleaning the Fish Tank.  Flossie, Floppy, Fluffy, Zizzy, Sulky and Coupon are all still going strong. Floppy last part of his tail and it has grown back.  Betcha didn’t know that happened.  Sulky and Zizzy have put on a bit of weight.  So telling them apart from Floppy and Fluffly is… not possible. Coupon has grown in confidence, and no longer lives shivering in the Bog Wood.  Sigh.  Whole New Worlds into which my children have taken me.  Anyway. The Man has a new sucky siphon thing which he used to hoover the gravel. He cleaned the filters.  I caught snails, because The Man won’t touch ‘em.  I caught 10, and put them in a plastic tub, where most were flattened in a single squelch by the curious and chubby index finger of Son 2 aged 2y 2m.   

Then we went crabbing. This was down to The Man.  Yesterday, having a quiet cuddle with Son 1 aged 5y 1m, he said idly: “What time’s your party?”  Oh dear, wrong in so many ways.  I had accepted an invitation to Little Classmate’s party. And then I had to ring back and say he couldn’t go. I explained all this to Son 1, and he’d protested, but then forgotten. The Man dredged it all up again. And then said, to calm the wails: “Don’t worry, we’ll go crabbing instead.”  Son 1 was thrilled. “Darling, there’s a Force 10 coming through, and the Coastguards are asking people to stay away from quays,” I said. A cubic metre of water weighs a tonne. My new fact of the day.  More wailing. Today the sky was blue, the water was flat, so we all went down to the Quay at the end of The Terrace, and caught bucketsfull.

The Aged Aunt has died, and I am strangely unsettled. She had a stroke while we were on holiday, and has been in hospital since. Eldest Brother was her carer, and I’d spoken to him last weekend to see how they both were.  Younger Sister rang this morning; she’d died in her sleep.  The Aged Aunt was my late father’s elder sister.  There was another brother, shot dead aged 19 by a German when he parachuted into Normandy in 1945.  I feel as if a link with my Dad has been cut.  We took the boys to see her in June journeys so at least we have pictures to show them later.  I watched Son 2 load pigs, sheep and people onto his Playmobil tractor. He knocked it over. “Oh Deer. Wos ‘appen ‘ere.”  The light caught on his pale white face, his skin smooth, his eyes shining.  In 1924 my Grandmother may have sat, with the same adoring expression on her face, watching the Aged Aunt play.

Tags:

I have just been considering what constitutes a popular blog. I have noticed that a popular blog needs to contains posts which people can either strongly relate (which includes humour) or find useful. I saw a blog written by a woman who claimed to be a hooker, which became popular beyond belief. It is the quintessential pop-blog. Key topic: Sex. A topic everyone can relate to. And lets face it, how many women have wondered what it would be like to be a hooker? And how many guys have considered hiring one at some point. So this woman created a blog which appealed to the sexual curiosity of millions, and did a very good job of it. No wonder it became so popular. She got a book deal and became deservedly rich.

Now contrast it with this blog – the pseudo-intellectual musings of some weird guy. Who can relate to that? Not many. Which is fine because popularity isn’t my goal for this blog. But I would love to create another blog based around a pop-topic and persona, and then try to make it super-dooper popular! It would be a fun social experiment… and… with some luck… it could make me rich!!! Well, I can dream. Maybe I will try it someday

Okay … now this is my latest girlfriend … what a sweet little face!

Movie Poster 27x40

 

Creepshow is an American horror-comedy anthology film directed by George A. Romero (of Night of the Living Dead and Dawn of the Dead fame), and written by Stephen King (Carrie, The Shining, Misery, The Stand).

It was considered a sleeper hit at the box office when released in November 1982, earning over $21 million domestically, and remains a popular film to this day among horror genre fans. The film was shot on location in Pittsburgh and the suburb areas. It consists of five short stories referred to as “Jolting Tales of Horror”: “Father’s Day”, “The Lonesome Death of Jordy Verrill”, “Something to Tide You Over”, “The Crate” and “They’re Creeping Up on You!”. Two of these stories, “The Crate” and “The Lonesome Death of Jordy Verrill” (originally titled “Weeds”), were adapted from previously published Stephen King’s short horror tales. The segments are tied together with brief animated sequences. The film is bookended by scenes, featuring a young boy named Billy (played by Stephen King’s own son, Joe King), who is punished by his father for reading horror comics. The film is an homage to the E.C. horror comic books of the 1950s such as Tales from the Crypt, The Vault of Horror and The Haunt of Fear.

Buy this Title on Blu-ray

In later years, the international rights of the film would be acquired by Republic Pictures, which today is a subsidiary of the Paramount Motion Pictures Group, itself owned by Viacom. The film’s UK rights are owned by Universal Pictures.

Trivia:

• Stephen King carried a toy figure of the character “Greedo” from Star Wars (1977) on the “Creepshow” set for good luck.
• Cameo: [Joe Hill] (son of Stephen King) The young boy featured in the beginning of the film (avid reader and collector of “Creepshow” comic books).
• Rice Krispies were used as maggots on the corpse’s eyes in the first story, “Father’s Day”. In addition, real maggots were also utilized.
• The marble ashtray (which plays a major role in Creepshow’s first story, “Father’s Day”) is featured in all five of the film’s stories if you look closely.
• The wrestling match Jordy Verrill is watching on TV in the second segment, “The Lonesome Death of Jordy Verrill”, was being called by Vince McMahon (Chairman of the WWF – now WWE). The wrestlers in the ring were then-current WWF Champion Bob Backlund and The Samoan No. 1.
• A sign leading to “Castle Rock” (Stephen King’s trademark fictitious town) appears at the very end of the segment “The Lonesome Death of Jordy Verrill”, among other signs.
• Ted Danson, who played Harry Wentworth in “Something to Tide You Over”, said in a T.V. interview that his daughter was on the set during the scene where his character returns from the dead encased in rotting flesh and seaweed. He purposely tried avoiding his young daughter out of fear of scaring her. Finally, despite his best efforts, she went up to him, looked at him and simply said, “Oh, hi Dad.”
• It is rumored that Max von Sydow was originally slated to play Upson Pratt in Creepshow’s final story, “They’re Creeping Up On You!”.
• In a “Creepshow” special feature from the pages of “Cinefantastique” magazine around the time of “Creepshow”’s release, Stephen King (screenwriter) and George A. Romero (director), revealed that if the film’s final story (“They’re Creeping Up On You!”) had proven to be too difficult and ambitious to film, it would have been substituted with the King short story “The Hitch-Hiker”, which ended up being the final story of the film’s sequel, Creepshow 2 (1987), directed by George A. Romero’s cinematographer on the original Creepshow, Michael Gornick.
• Originally, in Stephen King’s first draft 142-page screenplay for the film, the stories “The Crate” and “Something to Tide You Over” switched places. Making “The Crate” story number 3 and “Tide” story number 4. This is also how the Berni Wrightson Creepshow graphic novel adaptation turned out.
• In Stephen King’s original script for the film, the final story, “They’re Creeping Up On You!”, originally took place in a lush, carpeted penthouse apartment. However, because with roaches this would have been unworkable, Romero opted for a more empty almost hospital room-like set for the story.
• Two of the characters featured in the film, Tabitha and Richard (The new professors at the faculty reception at the beginning of the fourth segment, “The Crate”), were named after Tabitha King (Stephen King’s wife) and Richard Bachman (his ghostwriting name), according to the author.
• In the film’s second segment, “The Lonesome Death of Jordy Verrill”, the film playing on Jordy’s television in the background is A Star Is Born (1937), according to director George Romero’s commentary on the UK special edition DVD.
• The prop 10-cent “CREEPSHOW” comic book featured in the film was drawn and inked by veteran artist ‘Jack Kamen’, one of the artists for the original E.C. crime and horror comics of the 1950’s. Creepshow was a tribute to these comic books. Jack Kamen also created the comic book-style poster for the film, which was also featured on the front of the Plume “Creepshow” comic book adaptation (which Bernie Wrightson, another prolific horror comic artist, drew and inked the interiors for). Originally, (‘Stephen King (I)’ wanted Graham Ingels, another EC artist (famous for his work on the title “The Haunt of Fear”) to do the artwork for the film’s poster, but he refused. It was head of EC comics ‘William M. Gaines’ who then suggested Jack Kamen do the assignment. Kamen accepted.
• A screen capture of the “Creepshow” comic book featured in the film reveals that the letters page has letters from “Brian Hall of Ann Arbor, Mich.” and “David Graves of Spruce, Maryland”, among others. Spruce is the maiden name of King’s wife Tabitha. David Graves is the name of King’s late brother-in-law (married to wife Tabitha’s sister, Catherine). David Graves lived in Maryland (although not “Spruce”, Md), until his death in 2000.
• The on-set nickname for the monster in the crate in Creepshow’s fourth story was “Fluffy”, as named by director George A. Romero. The creature’s creator (and makeup artist on the entire film), Tom Savini, was the shorter garbageman featured near the end of the film.
• Why does Aunt Bedelia’s father come to life after 7 years in the first story “Father’s Day”? Not because of the lucky number it turns out. If you watch closely you will see Bedelia spills whiskey on the grave. In Gaelic, the word for whiskey is translated as Water of Life, and is likely a nod to James Joyce and his book “Finnegan’s Wake”. In the story a builder’s laborer falls from a ladder and breaks his skull, but is revived when someone spills whiskey on his corpse at the wake. The story of Finnegan’s Wake is in turn written based off an old Dublin street ballad.
• At the end of “The Lonesome Death of Jordy Verrill”, on the signpost is the town of Portland, Maine. This was Stephen King’s home town, and King is the star of this segment of the film.
• Adrienne Barbeau was still married to John Carpenter when Creepshow was released. Carpenter would make the film version of Stephen King’s Christine (1983) the following year. King wrote and makes an appearance in Creepshow.
• The housekeeper in the “Father’s Day” sequence is Mrs.Danvers. The malevolent housekeeper in Alfred Hitchcock’s suspense film Rebecca (1940) is also named Mrs. Danvers.

Because i did!

Mwa haHahaHa! any ways so i’m reallllllllllllllly bord and i didnt have much to say so i’m up right now and i have a half day tomarrow so bing boing boop

Oh that reminds me my school has a play thursday!

You SEE timmy i’m not fat i told you!

For some reason i want cheese……….

Holy crap! Did you guys know about this!?!?!

I have a dog that thinks it’s a cat……..

ラッキーボードやガチャガチャアイテムでコーデ♪
今日はしゃねるちゃんからLiriopeさんのガチャガチャのヘアーを
頂きました♪ハットとフラワーがカラーチェンジ出来ます
短めヘアーが＿|￣|●ﾎﾟｯ｡o○(ヵヮｨｨ…)
しゃねるちゃんありまたお♥


今日FLUFFYさんのガチャガチャでGETしたファーのティペットが
か、かわいいー＞＜ｂ
ティペットをリボンで結んだタイプとリボンをほどいたタイプの
がちゃがちゃがあって、両方やって散財　ｳﾊﾊ･･
全色揃えたいっ!!１０カラー中８カラーGET♪
bambi柄が出ない；；
リボンのカラーチェンできて、ボンボンをOn/Off出来ます


ﾁｮｯﾄ前にラッキーボードでGETしたMNKのスカート
秋色カラーが可愛いﾃﾞｽ♥

そして靴ははるかちゃんが教えてくれたLiNeのピックギフト
タッチでカラチェン出来るリボン付きのフラットシューズ♪

:I’m wearing:
hair::Liriope: MOG plum_gatcha
tops:turtleneck
Crochet:*::UM::* Crochet [White]
skirt:MNK*SHOP Retro skirt pumpkin2_luckyboard
socks:Oo FLUFFY oO Knit & Net Sox
shoes::::LiNe::: Pabbuc MultiColor_pic gift
Tippet:Oo FLUFFY oO Fur Tippet – tied string – Multi_gatcha

FLUFFY
http://slurl.com/secondlife/Logray/172/100/46

MNK
http://slurl.com/secondlife/japan%20canvas/179/30/46

LiNe
http://slurl.com/secondlife/Jaguar%20Mountains/175/119/22

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Well it is time to start bloging… I had a blog in the past but I removed it mainly because It looked more like some random teens  daily journal. With so many different topics mostly of consisting of things people do not want to read about.
This blog however, will be different it is going to be about my family and Christianity.  Hence the name of my blog “My Christian family” (Or MCF for sort).
So why not introduce my family and myself in my vary first MCF posting

This is my vary beautiful wife “Luz”. Or as we call her “darling”.

I meet her online. At that time she wanted to go on missionary missions all over the world. I think that was what really fascinated me about her at first. Well not the missionary missions themselves but really her dedication she has for doing Gods work. Anyway’s to make a long stories short I married this vary smart, faithful and attractive women.

This is Fluffy my first corn snake and the snake that has lead me into my new love for reptile. (It’s a boy)

This is Sparta. He is my newest corn snake. Who by the way is the first snake to bite me.

Then there is me

My name is Brandon and I currently work at a local children’s hospital here. I am also the Arthur of this blog. I am a nondenominational Christian.

That is pretty much it for now. I may include other family members as well as friends into this blog.

i iz sheepdog

Uz an imposter! Iz da reel ting.

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Ok folks. Here we go. The results of the Scavenger Hunt I set as decided (with great deliberation) by wifey. Oh and all photos are hyperlinked back to their pages of origin. Have fun:

1. Surprised wild animal. This offering from Poolagirl gained 5 points from wifey. And it sure does look surprised!

2. A Red Plant. Bluesleepy took this impressive specimin. REEEEED!

3. A pirate flag. Well there are so dang many good results, but this one from our Cocoabean leapt out immediately at wifey and took the prize:

4. Something fluffy. Only our Poolie could find a fluffy cactus!

5. My Senior Moments (Terri T) certainly produced the most unusually coloured food. Wow is all either of us could say.

6. Casa Rosie’s person waving is an instant hit. Who doesn’t love Mariachi?

7. Oh lord were there some good, original and unusual entries for three fruit together. But I guess it shows the general base level of British humour that we just couldn’t pass up on Cocobean’s offering:

8. There were some really good entries for something on fire, but this was particularly impressive. I think the flame itself looks like something from a James Bond opening sequence. Nice one Terri!

9. Clown trousers. Photographed by Rosie, modelled by Poolie! I think I know why wifey chose this. You see, I wear similar trousers and I call them my clown pants! Worryingly, I have also owned that hat, and it disappeared about a year ago. I wonder if it crossed the pond and wound up in SD?

10. Terri’s Bagel wins the bagel entry. Perhaps it was the artistic slicing. Or the juxtaposition of the modern technology of laptop with the ancient technology of bagel?

11. Someone dancing. Bluesleepy doing the clown shoe shuffle as immortalised by Poolagirl!

12. I don’t think anyone will argue that Terri’s sealions playing is a beauty. Aren’t they cute.

13. Terri also netted the figure of authority prize for this imposing fella! Who are LPSD anyway. Lounge Police San Diego?

14. We pretty much both agreed while roaring that bluesleepy absolutely ran away with the tacky statue. Must be tough, considering the size of it!

15. was hard fought. Garish colours? Good grief there were some garish colours. But Casa Rosie took 1st with this:

16. Bluesleepy’s princess must be the most unusual. It certainly hooked wifey anyway.

17. Bluesleepy also caught this magnificent pirate lass for someone asleep. Is it Anne Bonny do we think?

 18. At last… Yankee Chick walks away with one. Not coz of the quality of her photos I might add, but there being only a few. I think she was having too much fun to photo. A ‘thinking outside the box’ version of aircraft in flight, but wifey was very impressed with it, and I think so am I!

19. Cocoabean’s wool was, we felt, the most artistic. Wifey gave it top marks. And I’d have loved to see the original purple sheep. We only having boring black and white ones over here.

20. Last, but certainly far from least is a javelina. And this being a real, live porker having been caught in the act, absolutely ran away with that. This is the javelina that started the hunt and so deserves this win! I think I shall call her Sharice…

So by the list that wifey gave me and my own not considerable powers of calculation, I make that:

Yankee Chick with 1 win for 5pts  and 6 photos for 1pt each = 11pts

Zen and Chocolate (Cocoabean) with 3 wins for 15pts and 20 photos = 35pts

Poolagirl with 3 wins for 15pts and 20 photos = 35pts

Casa Rosie with 4 wins for 20pts and 17 photos = 37pts

Bluesleepy with 4 wins for 20pts and 20 photos = 40pts

My Senior Moments (Terri) with 5 wins for 25pts and 20 photos = 45pts

And so Terri… The winner and final champeeen!

There is a prize, and wifey and are will be organising it and working out winging it over to Terri in the next week or so. Intercontinental prizes take some working out!

Needless to say, I’ve bookmarked all these pages so I can pop over and have a giggle or a guffaw at any time, as there were just so damn many good photos. If you’ve just dropped by, I urge you to go visit these ladies and gawp with awe at their photos and their blogs!

Thanks guys. That was fun. Who knows… maybe next time I’ll take part and someone else can set one!

Back with normal mundane things tomorrow, like naked fat men, bald tires, gunge and sleeping sickness.

Ciao all.

 DISCLAIMER: Our new place isn’t as bad as you’re going to read below – im just stretching the facts for a tall tale is all – and i kinda like my own wit! So although drive by’s happen from time to time on this street; and YES the police DO get called out here often and the HELIOCOPTERS do fly over here nightly- it’s NOT as bad as i’m portraying it in this post – there is NO hooker hotel and NO “shooting gallery” next door (that i know of anyway) and when people pass out in front of my driveway…i just run over them – (since the cops don’t stop here that much I figure i have about a 50/50 chance of getting in trouble….)

Some of you know we had to move because of our Fluffy.  I suddenly realized I hadn’t really gone into DETAIL about my new place, my neighborhood and the surrounding area. Just pretend for a moment I’m writing a REAL real estate rental ad. (Don’t worry, if it were really THIS bad, i wouldn’t be living here…).  

FOR RENT!

Cozy duplex  located in the Del Paso Heights neighborhood of Sacramento, Ca. Del Paso Heights is a ‘working class’ neighborhood with a high demand for rental housing. The property is located on a moderately quiet street with a large park, grocery and other amenities within walking distance. 

Please allow me, the renter, to add a few more details… 

 About the property

This duplex  is located right smack dab in the middle of Del Paso Heights - an infamous suburb of  Sacramento, Ca.  The duplex is too small for more than one couch, yet affords ample access should your neighborhood home invader choose to engage in a  “spur of the moment home invasion” - so convenient for last-minute gift ideas!

 This building was constructed during the  1940’s, during that era of “we trust in our government” – when whacking your neighbor and burying the body under your own porch was still a future endeavor by a yet-unborn John Wayne Gacey. 

Meet your neighbors and check out the neighborhood!  

The dwelling is situated at such an angle as to have a 24 hour unobstructed view of the neighboring house – and it’s activities.   One won’t have to spend much time at all before guessing that the aforementioned structure serves as a hooker motel by day – with quite an extensive patronage. The client base is large enough that resident parking becomes scarce at an alarming rate by  by 11 a.m. each day.   Those clients possessing vehicles seem to have been given a special “group rate” discount for ”massage” services -  as they all seem to arrive at the exact same time – parking their cars, motorcycles and sometimes bicycles in front of the duplex’s driveway ..for hours.  And the festivities next door only grow more festive once darkness  hits  –  when the hooker hotel is magically  transformed into a “shooting gallery”, catering to another type of customer – that of the corner drug dealer – who is also the day time pimp, by the way.  Although this clientale appears to have lost the ability to drive a while back, strangely enough they’ve retained the skill of parallel parking – and do so bodily as they manage to pass out at just the right angle to block the driveway for the rest of the night.   

Adjacent to this duplex is a large, deceptively peaceful-looking apartment complex that’s home to a multitude of colorful  ”border brothers”.  The unforgettable  drive- by hootanannies  (complete with loud threats,  cursing in spanish – and all to the tune of happy mariachi music being played on CD in the background)  commence nightly and without fail  between the hours of 8 -10, Monday through Saturday (with Sundays off for Mass).   

Economic demographics

The street itself  is one of a few located in this “working class neighborhood” – named this for several reasons: 

1. Residents living on this street are always “working” to dodge stray bullets that fly without warning at their heads, sometimes “just for no reason at all – boredom maybe…” (quoting one resident gang member) 

2. After about a month of  living here, most residents suddenly find a renewed interest in working  -  and therefore get two, sometimes three jobs which keep them busy and out of the house for most of the year. 

3. Since technically drug dealers are generating an “income” of sorts by selling crack and prostituting their mammas at night   – right  after she makes cooks them a meal and washes the dishes of course – it stands to reason they be counted in with the “working” class”.   Although the finances gained are sometimes at the expense and safety of others, it’s been determined to be legal ever since the government set this very precendent into motion years before.  

The Environment

The street IS moderately quiet…once the gunfire has stopped,  and the bodies have been photographed, tagged, bagged and hauled away.  As policemen rope off the last of the crime scene, and the crowds fall away a moment of quiet settles over the HOOD.   As the tired public servants sullenly head back to their black and whites to make the drive back to Dunkin Donuts, they hold out  no hope of finding that their maple bars and coffee will still be on their abandoned table when they return. 

Security

Yes!  The police station is only a half a block away, and the squad cars can be spotted cruising up and down this very street many times during the day – but the occupants won’t be stopping by for a personal visit again anytime soon – at least not until the next media-driven local crime wave forces their appearance at the scene.   

Our beautiful park! 

The street is located next to a large golf course/park where the muggings and rapes – anal and regular – start without delay at 3 pm on the nose every day, rain or shine.  At 3 pm the instigators have already been out of their coma for an hour and have shot up a couple of lines of puta.  They’re hopping, hopped up, and raring to go !   

Convenient shopping!

The local convenience/grocery store down the street is unique in which a trip there often results in one being robbed two times for the price of one!  The first assault occurs upon ENTERING the store and finding sky-high prices on just the things you stopped in to purchase. The second attack occurs as your LEAVING the establishment still bitching about the prices. This time it’s not milk or hotdogs that are administering the beating,  but one of the many angry homeless panhandling gangs native to this region.  You’ll find you’ve been under close surveillance the instant you informed them you had “no change” to give them  – YET..you were observed going into the store to  buy groceries. Very interesting. These gangs take special offense at being lied to. 

No matter which gang a panhandler belongs to he shares a few common traits with his brothers of another mugger.  Each member has an empty package of cigarettes in his pocket, carries a moldy wiffle bat in this right hand and a cracked coffee mug stating “Number 2 Dad” or “Kittens are cute”  in his left.  Every gang is accompanied by a fat and smelly female whose apparent job is to sit on her fat ass, laugh and point while the robbing and mugging is going on.  To add insult to injury your one un-bloodied eye will often retain enough vision to see that she’s stuffing her face with the remnants of the last box of vanilla zingers the store had to offer – the very reason you stopped at the inconvenience store in the first place, after spending hours checking in all the stores in the “normal areas”.  

Pet-Friendly!

On the upside – restricted breeds such as rottweilers, pit bulls, American Staffordshire terriers and the like are welcome with open arms here – in fact, most residents have a set of them!

I have always liked cats more than dogs, but recently I have started to love certain breeds of dog, especially these two:

Samoyed puppies – they are a bit like a husky, but as far as I am aware only come in white and cute and fluffy:

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Pomeranian puppies – adorable, they look like miniature versions of the Samoyed:

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I have not updated for a few days. Myself, Ryan, Lauren and Vawn went shopping in Maidstone on Saturday. I had not been shopping there before, and there are some great shops. I bought some new hot-pants from Zara, the ‘Jamie’s America’ cookbook, which accompanies the ‘Jamie’s American Road Trip’ series, my Halloween outfit, some cosmetics and yet another large hot chocolate from Costa. Lauren took some photos, and these are my favourites:

Awesome

Halloween was quite fun at work. I took some photos of myself (my hair was bigger than this at work) :

So that is what I have been up to. Watching Grand Designs this evening; the Huf Haus episode, and it is one of my favourites, the end result is beautiful!

Jenn x

Tumble dry, low heat No iron
Dry flat, Iron is needed

da wash masheen iz fun!

Picture by: Crystal Caption by: shepmom via Loldog Builder

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