List of positive aspects about her:

• She generally is doing a good job, motivates students, helping our school with the Erasmus stuff, inspiriting students and introducing them to new opportunities.
• She is hard on me, because she really cares, I think she wants me to succeed as much as I do.
• She has a lot of knowledge. Although she’s not that young her attitude towards design is very fresh.
• She has this different personality than I have but thats alright we dont spend that much time anyway, so it doesn’t affect me that much.
• Because of her I shot a lot of rockets of desires.
• It’s ok, Im gonna finish that and I dont have to speak with her again;)
• This is just a project, that’s all I dont have to worry about that.
• Looking at her through the eyes of source gives me a sense of relief, with love and appreciation.
• Whatever she thinks it doesnt affect me unless I feel bad about that. If I don’t, it doesn’t change my point of attraction at all. Its completely irrelevant
• ALL IS WEL AND I AM LOVED

My co-workers were all beginning to feel the same way, so we did a focus wheel at work on Friday afternoon.  It was a bit tedious.  Realistically, we knew that life isn’t always perfect or even great. We knew  that we would always have times of adversity or resistance.  We also knew we didn’t want the negative things that occur around us to affect us so much. In other words, we want to be able to live and experience our lives, but not be so reactive in our life.

The focus wheel brought us to the realization that we all needed a “happy place” in our minds.  Someplace we could go, some song we could sign, some feeling we could muster. As our attention to the unwanted issue drifted to our happy place (or at least away from that which was unwanted) we felt better.  The mere distraction of thinking about something else was the key.  Now our focus was shifted, our minds had let go of that unwanted thing and we were able to breathe again.

As simple as this sounds, it is not always easy to do.  When someone is in your face it is a real challenge to simply think a better thought.  But a new piece to this puzzle was revealed to me in a dream the night after we did the focus wheel at work.  Think about gratitude. Just find something to be grateful for.  This is easy, quick and can be done even in a tense situation.  I can definitely find something to be grateful for even when I am talking to a grumpy customer or dealing with an office tension.

Try it.  The next time someone or something knocks you out of your bliss, try being grateful for something.  It is impossible to stay focused on the unwanted AND be grateful for something at the same time.

I am definitely one of the luckiest people I know because we talk about Law of Attraction at work EVERY DAY!  We actually have an “Abraham” meeting with the whole office every morning!  How amazing is that?!

I have taught everyone at work how to do focus wheels and they love doing them together at the office.  But none of these people do them at home alone.  Together, we have done many and so I know they all know the process.  But somehow or other they believe they can’t do them alone.  So maybe teaching the process isn’t enough.  Or maybe we all have to come to our own processes as we are ready or as we need them.  Either way, I am here to tell you that Focus Wheels work for me and I will get up and do them in the middle of the night when I am tossing and turning.

I have some Focus Wheels that are not even complete.  I just have focused on what I DO want in the center and done enough positive, downstream statements to support what I want that I get half way done and I can feel that my energy on the subject has changed and I am relaxed and feeling good and I just don’t need to go any further in that moment.

I encourage you all to try doing a focus wheel on a subject that has you upstream or frustrated or irritated or unsettled.  Write down the opposite of what you are looking at (what you DO want) in the middle of a piece of paper.  Then likes spokes on a wheel, come up with a sentence or two to support what you are wanting.

The key to this is to back up to a place where you feel good.  Do really general statements or affirmations first.  This allows you to feel good about the subject and be ready for the next best thought.

For an example, I will think, “I want to lose weight.” So in the middle of the piece of paper, I would write that desire in a positive way. “I want to lose weight” is not exactly the most positive way to say it.  I think I would use, “I want to feel and look good in my clothes.”  Something like that.  A statement that is truly a positive desire.

Spoke #1 would be something pretty general and positive to get me started like, “I know that Law of Attraction will bring to me what I am thinking about, and I love thinking about feeling good.”  This is a pretty easy, general statement that allows you to feel more positive than negative.  Then, do spoke #2, adding spokes until you have 10 to 12 or until you can really FEEL the difference in your desire.

Spoke #2 could be something like, “I love knowing there is nothing I have to DO.  I just need to FEEL good!”

Spoke #3: “I love looking and feeling good.  I love moving in the direction of what I am wanting.”

Spoke #4: “I know my body is constantly balancing itself at all levels.  I love knowing that I am always moving towards health and well-being.”

These statements are not drastic.  They just soothe me into a place of allowing.  I am not telling myself I have to limit calories, or run an hour a day.  The point is to focus on what I am wanting in a way that allows me to feel better and more hopeful than I did before.

Try a focus wheel or two!  When you get to the place that a thought has definitely made you feel better about what you are wanting, you will understand my enthusiasm for focus wheels.  They are definitely worth the time and effort.  Enjoy!

I know what I don’t want:
I felt overwhelmed and embarrassed with my pool performance last night.  I know I can shoot better than I did… I allow myself to get nervous, and the more nervous I become, the worse my game becomes.  I want to align with ease and clarity when I compete in pool.

What is it that I do want:
I love the feeling of alignment in all things I choose to do.  It’s so sweet to feel relaxed and in the flow in those moments when I release all tension and resistance and simply allow my talents to be fully expressed.

And around the wheel:

1)  I know that I play pool well; my stroke is getting straighter and straighter and I have a good eye.

2)  My teammate Eve is so awesome in the way that she offers encouragement and advice.

3)  I shot extremely well at league last week, I even beat a couple of people who have decades more experience at pool than I do.

4)  I made the most beautiful, complex, elegant 9 ball shot last night… my opponent literally bowed to me because he was so impressed.

5)  Contrasting experience (experiencing what I don’t want) is great for spurring me into action to attract the experiences that I do want.

6)  I love that Patty comes to league every week and beams with pride as I move around the table and sink ball after ball, whether I win or lose.

7)  Almost everyone that I get the opportunity to play in league is extremely encouraging and the always acknowledges how much my game has improved since the last time they played me.

8)  I totally believe in the law of attraction which keeps me turning again and again to the best feeling thoughts I can find on many subjects, which is really a great way to live life.

9)  I particularly love the experience of actually witnessing the improvement in my game in the moment that I’m thinking good feeling thoughts.

10) Seeing the direct, immediate, positive results when I turn to good feeling thoughts relative to my pool game strongly encourages me to focus good feeling thoughts in all areas of my life… what a blessing!

11) It is spectacular and affirming when Eve coaches/lectures me on using the law of attraction to improve my game even though (as far as I can tell) she’s never heard of the law of attraction as a practical approach to life… she just intuitively knows that positive thinking works.

12) I really enjoy meeting so many extremely talented, fun, funny people as a result of competing in a pool league… I would really miss this adventure if I quit.

*******************************************************

Mmmmmm…. I feel really good now.  That was sweet.  I’m going to go bask in this feeling for a while.  I think I like this linear focus wheel idea… I look forward to doing more of these.

Yeah, I know, it’s not poetry… but it sure feels good!

Trouble is, I’ve had some difficulty figuring out how to adapt focus wheels to this blog.  Patty and I hand write our wheels, and they are really kind of a stylized sort of diagram thing that is not very conducive to a linear left-to-right top-to-bottom format.  Well, this morning I’ve begun to think of focus wheels in a new way.  What if I think of focus wheels as a sort of structured poem?  I mean, they aren’t really poems, but there is something like structure to them.  I mean, they aren’t like haiku, which (in English) is typically approached as a 17 syllable poem in 3 lines arranged in a 5 syllable / 7 syllable / 5 syllable structure.  Focus wheels are nowhere near that constrained, but they do have their structure.  Let me explain how Patty and I approach them.

To start, along the top edge of a piece of paper we first write a brief statement of something that is going on that isn’t as good as we want it to be.  Examples of a typical opening statement might be something that we’re feeling annoyed about, something that we feel bad about, maybe something that’s causing us to feel guilty or angry or otherwise unworthy.  We make this statement brief and to the point.  Next, in the center of the page we write a thought or sentiment opposite to our opening statement.  For example, if I write “I feel depressed today” as my opening statement (the mood or attitude that I want to improve), then in the center of the page I might write, “I love it when I feel joy and happiness flowing through my whole body.”  Then we circle that center statement (the mood or attitude that we want to build on) and we go around the clock (so to speak) and write 12 statements in a circle around the center statement.  The objective is to write 12 statements, true to our real life experience, that support and/or build on the center statement.  If approached with an open heart and a genuine intent to improve our current state of mind, by the time we finish a wheel, we typically feel much better than when we started it.

Here’s an example of a real life focus wheel that I wrote this morning:

Click for high resolution image

By the time I wrote the twelfth statement around the center thought, I was feeling pretty good.  And it only took a few minutes to turn my crappy mood around.

So, if I think of the focus wheel as a poem (for the sake of doing focus wheels in a blog), I could create a poem structure in 14 parts.  The first stanza would be the mood I want to improve.  The second stanza would be my center statement, the mood that I want to build on, and then the next 12 stanzas would be the 12 statements around the clock laid out in linear fashion.  Yeah, I know, it’s a pretty loose definition of “poem”, but I think I can make it work for me. 

I look forward to being able to put some focus wheels here in my blog.

9 months…and counting

I’m one deep breath away from a hailstorming, late pregnancy breakdown.   I decide to take Frankie to the park because this option is maybe barely better than any other.  I’m too far into exhaustion and discontent to feel real hope that anything’ll make me feel better, but I am officially, and mind-bleachingly, bored with my own whine.  I feel like Bill Murray in “What About Bob?” when he finally gets himself onto the bus and asks the person next to him, “Hi, can you knock me out?  Just punch me in the face…”

No chance.  There was no one in my life that brave so I waddled onto the bleachers, trying to find a way to sit that didn’t hurt.  In front of me on the basket ball court Hispanic guys and girls were playing a hot, sweating game of flirt & shoot.  They were trim, mobile and happy, everything I wasn’t.  A sudden pang of longing to let a game carry me away took over my thinking.  Well, I knew I couldn’t move much, but maybe I could move my thoughts a little: I took out my pen and paper.

A focus wheel is a tool, I learned from Abraham-Hicks, used to shift your thoughts to a better feeling place.   I made a list on the side of the page of the yucky thoughts that were gunking up my engine, and the corresponding emotions.  I could see that I’d been focusing exclusively on everything I didn’t want.  Then I began the clearing work, slow going at first, but with each better feeling thought, a whole new world of better feeling thoughts opened up, I was climbing my way out, it felt like I was sprouting wings off the tips of my fingers holding me in that tenuous, delicate life-giving new land of slightly better-feeling thoughts.  I felt so, so… relieved.

Then I looked down at belly and remembered my impatience with my situation, so strong it had set the tone of my recent life, and I knew I needed to get deeper into my happiness, to become so much more familiar with it, so I leaned into appreciating.  I loved on the sky and cool crisp air, how I will always have a setting sun to marvel at like a portable art museum, how it renders everything a work of art, then I wrote:  ”I want you to find me here, I want you come play with me here because I can’t get to you right now.”

I didn’t know who I was talking to.  It felt good.  It was really what I wanted to say with my whole heart.  I wanted someone to play with.

I continued on with focus wheels, picking up real speed and was feeling downright chipper.  I had fully remembered how I will always land well because I know how to stay tuned in and follow the downstream steps.  As long as I’m happy, I’ll always have a home on the leading edge, and that’s what I was doing here, on these bleachers, making my home on the leading edge of thought.

Just then a little gorgeous brown boy runs past me, then backs up with a wicked light in his eye, “you, a…you, a…” He struggles for a moment, then finds it, “you a creator?”  I nod, after the shocked pause.  He laughs as if this is the best thing he’s ever heard, then dashes off.

Then a small darker  brown child suddenly appears in my armpit and grabs my pen out of my hand.  The first boy reappears and points at the smaller one then yells at me “make him!”   I think he wants me to draw a picture of the other boy, but I feel inept, a bad drawer.  He thinks I’m a creator.  I’m not. I’m just…

He reaches over and retrieves another pen from my hair and the two start a scribble frenzy all over my writing.  The first boy, Nana, is so intent that as the rest of the children from the family come over (scaling fences, racing through leaves) he seems to draw inward into the drawing.  He finishes it, a drawing of the smaller boy, Devon, a squealing sunshine of a human, and writes his name, then begins a drawing of the girl, 10 or 11, named Tikea, who sailed over the fence like a superhero.  She seems uncomfortable with me and keeps punching the boys who have cozied up and no longer want to play with her.  Lastly comes the baby, who just wants to hurt me, then laugh evily afterwards.  There’s lots to enjoy about this tiny thing in camo overalls and sandals furiously hurling handfuls of sticks and leaves at my head.  I jump over the bit where he seems to want to hurt me and scoop a pile of leaves and throw them high into the air.  They sail slowly down around us like a veil.  After a moment, his play softens and he begins asking  ”you weddy?” before hurling leaves at my face.  I nod.  I am weddy.

Nana shows me what he’s been drawing.  He explains the picture of his cousin, Tikea,  ”she’s like this, all at once” and does a rapid fire series of lip movements.  I nod, totally not getting it.  He sees this and scribbles some more.  Come to think of it, I can’t really understand any of them.  The baby seems to speak Swahili.  Finally, Nana’s done.  I give it the same not-really-looking-but-pretending-to cursory glance I often give to the plethora of kid’s art I receive each day, then I stop.  Full stop.  The welt of exquisite a spring air, the laughing children, this perfect moment – I just got in, and I’ll be damned if I duck out again by a silly habit of going on autopilot.  I wanted more invitations to go all the way in, fuck cursury glances – I really wanted to see what he was showing me.  On his drawing of Tikea, he’d drawn three simultaneously occurring mouths: a smiley, a frown, and a straight line. He explains, “all at once, she’s happy…and sad…and sometimes” then he struggles for the word for the word for the straight line, “She don’t feel nothing.”

Then the same rapid succession of facial gestures, happy, sad, nothing.  Then leaps off the bleachers into the leaves.  ”Nana”  say out loud after he’s gone.  I like the say his name feels in my mouth and ears.  When he returns, he’s eager for me to draw him,  ”make me now.”

I realize I want to draw him, to play with him in this way, I don’t care if I  can or not, what does that have to do with anything?  I’m beyond whatever shyness is.  I tell he has to sit still, then I begin to trace almonds onto the page, aching for my box of crayons at home to  try and capture some of his gorgeous skin color, the gold in his smiling eyes.   After 30 whole seconds he’s vibrating again; the rest of the crew tries to simultaneously hurl him off the bleachers and bully him into staying quiet for this drawing.

We all sense there is a gift present.  We don’t even know where it’s coming from or who it’s for.  But we’re all inside of it.  I love his wild hair, love drawing it around his cauliflower ears.  I keep tapping him gently when he moves, in an easy forever-knowing way. I say “stop or I’ll draw you like an alien”  He loves it, then the mother’s voice, strong and late-prego-tired, cuts through it all and they’re off.  I learned that she’s having a boy in a few days too.  I struggle to stand, Nana’s name on my tongue.  I want him to have the picture, he didn’t even get to see it.  I look down at the picture, then sit down and keep looking at it.  He’s still there.  His hair curing towards the sky, his ears twitching, his feet just about to leap…Nana didn’t need to see that picture.  I did.

I feel awful. The day after tomorrow a tiny part of my dream is to become reality. But what is going on?!?! First I caught cold, couldn’t rehearse well and now this! Last night I spent in “the little girls room” – my stomach was sick. Now I’m drinking chamomille tea and thinking what in hell can I do. Yesterday evening I was really afraid that I am not going to make it, but now I feel that there is a place in my heart that says: dont’ give up!

What about trying the focus wheel I have learned from Esther Hicks? Here is a short description from Ezine-articles:

“Draw a circle and create 12 spokes around it like the numbers on a clock. In the center of your circle write your ideal affirmation. Using our example you would write “I am a millionaire.” Now starting with number one, write down a statement that you know is true now, such as “the universe has infinite abundance.” Your second statement will be a little more specific to you such as, “I am open to this infinite abundance.” Follow this with statements like “many people are millionaires, there are infinite sources by which I can become a millionaire, I am now allowing all sources to becoming a millionaire come into my life.”

I don’t have a circle here so I will have to satisfy with making a list.

My affirmation:

“My performance on Tuesday is a great success, all my skills and capacities work at their very best and the audience is filled with love. “

1. I know all the lyrics by heart
2. I know the music
3. I have a beautiful and a powerful voice
4. The ability to express my feelings is one of  my best capabilities
5. The view at the operahouse is so empowering
6. The pianist, Ilkka Paananen, is really great and supporting
7. I have sung the songs many times before an audience
8. People say that my dictation is very good
9. I have still time to prepare.
10. I have rehearsed with the pianist without bigger problems
11. It’s gonna be ok
12. I love to sing

Yes, well this makes me feel more confident. And yes, there will be one more rehearsal tomorrow. I am sure I will get the power to make this a success. Winners usually do

My perception is clouded and negative and I have the sense that I must be close to a lot of personal content that has my personal defenses ringing klaxons. Again, to explain, defenses against me—the instigator of this change. Funny how we can resist change… It’s also interesting how early childhood survival patterns can become so entrenched that the patterns will attack the self they were originally designed to defend.

So, my goal for tomorrow is to live a day imbued with joy. Let go of the past. Change my expectations. Change limiting thoughts into unlimited ones. Live in the moment. Allow joy!

Let’s see how I do.

Wrote tonight from about 9:40 to 10:30pm. Spent the first fifteen minutes combing over some previous writing.

With my daughter not coming over this weekend it opens up the opportunity to get dig a little deeper on some tasks I’ve been wanting to get to: timeline stuff, naming of some characters and a few planets, etc.

Let’s see how much I achieve.

Just in the writing of this I’m already feeling more excitement, more joy, more hope and looking forward to a day of feeling good.

Let’s see how good it can get.

Just to share, earlier in the week I tackled this subject with another friend of mine. We decided to do a focus wheel on the subject. A focus wheel is when you put in the center how you would like to feel about a subject and then you fill in the spokes around it with things that are true today that support it. So here is the one I worked up on my lack attitude. (I am not going to be able to post in a wheel format, but you might get the drift), if you want to learn more, read up on it in the Abraham-Hicks’ materials.

I feel balanced in knowing that the universe always provides whatever I want and need – Center

Spokes:
I always pay my bills on time
I’ve never been bankrupt
I’ve never spent one night homeless
Whenever an extra bill comes along, somehow I always have enough to pay it
I have a wonderful home
I take glorious trips several times a year
I have beautiful clothes I get to wear
I take as many dance classes as I like
I enjoy it when unexpected income arrives
I love knowing that it always works out
It has always worked out so far
I am feeling quite good about how law of attraction works
I feel comfortable in knowing that I have always had just enough
I’ve been pushing my just enough to further places and I always still have enough
I’m getting better at understanding that there is always enough and then some
I’m excited to enjoy even more treasures in the future
I will be excited to see how it all works out
I am excited to see where my next source of unexpected income comes from
I like knowing that the universe always balances things
I like knowing that I am becoming more and more balanced on this and many other subjects
I feel good
Oh, I really do!

Revolutionary trainings and products in the exciting new fields of Dynamic Eating Psychology and Mind Body Nutrition that change the way we look at food, nutrition, body, and weight. IPE features innovative distance learning programs and free Teleclasses. Learn more at Institute for Psychology of Eating or copy and paste this link http://www.1shoppingcart.com/app/?Clk=3053131

You can also listen to the Interview we did with Marc David on The Indigo Room right here http://recordings.talkshoe.com/TC-33443/TS-31586.mp3 This Book has assisted me in changing my own ideas,  thoughts around food and I have lost weight and it has not returned.

We discussed the Focus Wheel Process from the Book Ask & It is Given on Monday. Dawn Halbowner one of our Members has found A Focus Wheel Video and PDF online and is excited as I am to share it with you all
“I found a great site with a fantastic video of the Abraham-Hicks Focus Wheel. The video explains clearly how to use the wheel and offers free blank wheels. It’s AWESOME!! How can we get this info to the whole network? “–Dawn

click the link below

http://thearvindsingh.blogspot.com/2008/02/focus-wheel.html

Love You All
Sydney

So,
my reality is shifting higher, higher and higher; better, better and better; purer, purer and purer.
it is shifting to my very liking.

Although I not yet know how it is going to shift, but by LOA, it should be shifting to what I have been vibrationally offering. It is Law, it cannot be another way!