We all do it, we go through a mental check list of what we want when we go out to eat. No matter what the type of food may be. What is it that makes us go to the places time and time again? There are many factors that go into where we chose to eat. I have narrowed it down to few key points.

The most important thing I pay attention to is taste. It’s a given you probably wont eat somewhere if it doesn’t taste good. When I chose a place to eat I will go back if the food was filling and nice for the taste buds.

Next is the price point. I am not saying that everything has to be inexpensive because I know I have dropped my fair share of bills on good food. My question, is what your getting truly worth the cost? No one is complaining if your noodles cost three bucks but if it was eight would you still buy them?

These next two go hand in hand to me, service and atmosphere. If I go to a place that has a great feel but the food took 45minutes. How do I feel? If the waiter was rude or unaccommodating. How do I feel? If the service or atmosphere isn’t on par chances are I am not going back.

The last thing I always look out for is cleanliness and a consistency. The places that I always come back to are the places that are a clean and well kept. It’s also helpful to know that what I order will be the same as the last time. Some days I am in the mood to venture out and try something wild. However for places I eat at on a regular basis, I like to know that the experience will be the same as the last time.

So the next time your eating out in the city think about why you went where you did. Maybe you will start to appreciate your favorite local spots a little more.

Choi Jin Shil                                                                                              Jung Da Bin

With my current obsession with korean music, drama and basically entertainment, there came that craze about becoming an actress or singer or celebrity or such. Don’t shake your head at me… because everyone has that dream at least one point in their life. Well, at least most of us. Watching Shinee, So Nyo Shi Dae, Wonder Girls, etc. you just get this craving to be on stage too and have people screaming your name and having fans that send you gifts and seeing you face on billboards all across Asia. That would be nice, wouldn’t it. But let us step back into reality, shall we?

Phase 1: The Training

First, becoming popular celebrity, half of it depends on your looks. That is just the luck of the draw. If you’re pretty and can sing… you’ll probably end up in the singing industry with YG, SM, JYP of maybe DSP entertainment. If you’re pretty and have a nice body line, but you can’t sing… you’ll end up in the drama/acting industry, of you could be like Kim Tae Hee and just do CF, but she’s special especially her acting skills… but that’s a story for another time. Focusing on singers… most of the trainees have to be able to dance or sing, more of both. Training lasts at least 2-3 years and in the process you will be forced to learn basic chinese and english and maybe even japanese. Day after day… more singing and more dancing and on top of that, you’ll probably be in high school and school work is not excused because you’re a trainee. Try that one on your high school teacher. But let’s say, like a lot of us here, that we could go through any hardship during the trainee for years of success and popularity.

Phase 2: Stepping Into the Spotlight

If you make it throught the years of training, without being kicked out or quitting. Yes, people quit because sometimes the entertainment industries can be very harsh. They are there to create Asian superstars and could careless about whether you’re tired or not. The rumors about SME beating their singers because of a bad performance, that’s up to you to interpret. But I’m pretty sure that they won’t let it go nicely. Many think that once you get into SME and make it through the training and make it to the stage, that’s your ticket to popularity. Mostly true. But there is always a chance that you or your group won’t be so successful. Of course SME doesn’t flaunt their bands that have failed. A girl band under SME named M.I.L.K. lasted for about 2 year from 2001-2003. Isak N Jiyeon was a two member duo that only lasted one year. You may recognize Jiyeon as Lina from The Grace. What is Isak currently doing? A DJ. After years of training, one fail and she is a DJ.

One you’re a celebrity, the entertainment industry controls you’re life. The company own you and you do what they say or you can leave and risk going back to square one. They pick the clothes you wear, the makeup you wear, what event you go to. That may not sound so bad, but they suck almost every cent of the money from the albums you sell. So you better be selling a hell load amount of albums to be getting anything. A lot of artists hardly get enough sleep and some end up fainting on stage or going on a sick leave (coughHyoricough).

Final Phase: The Backstage

Let’s forwards about… 5 years. Let’s say that you have enjoyed about 5-6 years success as a singer and now what? Will you still be as popular? Statistics please!

S.E.S.   (1997-2002)

H.O.T.  (1996 -2001) (the bottom portion)

Fin.K.L  (1998-2002)

Some of te hottest and most popular bands o fhte 1990s and where are they now? A lot of the singers turning to acting because they don’t know what else to do. If you’re lucky you’ll succeed as an actress/actor or maybe even as a solo artist. All these former celebrities are reaching their 20’s and by the 30’s, no one know about their success on the screen because they are being overrun by newer and prettier/handsome bands. Think about all the current celebrities from SNSD, Wonder Girls, Big Bang, Shinee, etc. most of them haven’t even reached their 20’s yet, still teetering around the 17-18 mark. Even if they last 10 years in the entertainment industry, stretching it) they’ll be 26-29 years old. What to do now? They have almost nothing. And don’t tell about the college education. Most of the celebrities major in drama and the arts (duh) so they don’t learn anything that’ll help them in reality.

For some, this a scary realization and others may criticize my analysis of the celebrity life, but no matter how you think about it, glory can only last for a short time period. After that, glory will just escape you like trying to hold onto a rope of sand. So let’s think before you jump into what seems to be an oasis but is really the beginning of a desert of illusions. Think about the people who gave up their life in what seemed to be the perfect time. To give up what was thought to be the perfect life.

EVERYBODY KNOWS …
You can’t be all things to all people.
You can’t do all things at once.
You can’t do all things equally well.
You can’t do all things better than everyone else.
Your humanity is showing just like everyone else’s.

SO …
You have to find out who you are, and be that.
You have to decide what comes first, and do that.
You have to discover your strengths, and use them.
You have to learn not to compete with others,
Because no one else is in the contest of “being you.”

THEN …
You will have learned to accept your own uniqueness.
You will have learned to set priorities and make decisions.
You will have learned to live with your limitations.
You will have learned to give yourself the respect that is due,
And you’ll be a most vital mortal.

DARE TO BELIEVE …
That you are a wonderful, unique person.
That you are a once-in-all-history event.
That it’s more than a right, it’s your duty, to be who you are.
That life is not a problem to solve, but a gift to cherish.
And you’ll be able to stay one up on what used to get you down.

“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about
itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. After all today is the
tomorrow you worried about yesterday.”

• कई काम दूर से बहुत कठिन दिखते हैं,लेकिन एक बार शुरू कर दें तो रास्ते खुद-ब-खुद बनते चले जाते हैं।
• असंभव कुछ नही होता। बस थोडे से अतिरिक्त प्रयास की जरूरत होती है।
• There is always scope for improvement.
• प्राथमिकताएं तय करना बहुत जरूरी है, अन्यथा काफी समय उन कार्यों में नष्ट हो जाता है, जिनकी जरूरत नही थी ।
• कब क्या किसे कह रहे हैं, इस बारे में बहुत सावधान रहना चाहिय। ना जाने कब कौन सी बात उलटी पड जाये ।
• Never React, Always Respond. तुरंत प्रतिक्रिया देने से बचना चाहिये। समय लेकर ठंडे दिमाग से सोंच कर अपनी बात कहनी चाहिये। (‘चक दे इंडिया’ में एक संवाद था, ‘हर लडाई उसी समय नही लडी जाती, कुछ बाद के लिये भी छोड देना चाहिये’।)
• Nobody is indispensable. हमारे पहले भी दुनिया थी और हमारे बाद भी दुनिया चलेगी।
• हर काम, छोटे सा छोटा, अथवा बडा से बडा, कुछ सीखने का अवसर देता है, बशर्ते हम सीखने को तैयार हों।
• Never ever believe things which looks too obvious.
• Never judge people, based on first impression or their looks. Take time.
• COMMUNICATE. विवाद कितने भी हो जायें, संवाद बना रहना चाहिये। अक्सर एक फोन काल कई सारी गलतफहमियों को दूर करने के लिये काफी होती है।

इनमें से कुछ सबक खुद ठोकर खाकर सीखे हैं, कुछ दूसरों को देख कर। ये बात अलग है कि ये जानने और दिमाग में होने के बावजूद अक्सर गलतियां कर बैठते हैं। यहां लिख दिये हैं ताकि सनद रहे।

सुबह सुबह किसी बात पर मूड खराब हुआ तो यह “कूडे के ट्रक वाला सिद्धांत” याद आ गया। कुछ दिन पहले एक ई पत्र में प्राप्त हुआ था। सार कुछ इस तरह से है।

क्या आप एक खराब ड्राइवर, किसी अभद्र कर्मचारी, किसी बदमिजाज दुकानदार के चक्कर में अपना दिन खराब कर लेते हैं? सडक चलते आपसे किसी ने कुछ कह दिया, कोई दुकानदार बद्तमीजी से पेश आया, रेस्तरां में गये और सर्विस अच्छी नही हुई आदि आदि? एक अच्छे/सफल इन्सान का गुण यह है कि वह किस तरह से ऐसी गैरजरूरी बातों को नज़रअंदाज करके अपना ध्यान जरूरी कामों पर लगाये। कूडे के ट्रक का सिद्धांत कहता है कि -

“कई लोग कूडे से भरे ट्रक की तरह होते हैं। वे अपने साथ साथ क्रोध, भय, घृणा, नैराश्य का कचरा अन्दर में समेटे चलते हैं। जैसे जैसे यह कचरा उनके अन्दर भरता चला जाता है, उन्हे इसे कहीं फेंकने की जरूरत महसूस होती है। ठीक कचरे से भरे ट्रक की तरह। हो सकता है बदकिस्मती से आज आप उनके रास्ते में आ गये और उन्होने इसे आपके ऊपर फेंक दिया।

तो अबकी बार कोई अपना कचरा आपके ऊपर इस तरह फेंके, तो इसे दिल पर मत लीजिये। सामने वाले पर तरस खाइये। मुस्कुराकर उसे नजरंदाज कीजिये और खुश रहिये। आप ज्यादा अच्छा और प्रसन्न महसूस करेंगे। और हाँ, ये भी देखें कि कितनी बार हम अपना गुस्सा दूसरों पर उतारते हैं और कचरे के ट्रक की तरह बर्ताव करते हैं।”

ई मेल में इसके रचियता का नाम था, David J Polly. थोडा गूगल किया तो पता चला कि “The Law of Garbage Truck” डेविड साहब का ट्रेड मार्क है। वे एक ख्यातनाम वक्ता और लेखक हैं। कचरे के ट्रक वाली कहानी विस्तार से आप यहाँ पढ सकते हैं, अंग्रेजी में। इस पर एक वेबसाइट भी है। यहाँ और यहाँ डेविड साहब के ब्लाग भी हैं।

सिद्धांत सुनने में अच्छा लगता है ना। भारतीय दर्शन पर नज़र डालेंगे तो हमारे यहां इस तरह का दृष्टांत भगवान बुद्ध के प्रेरक प्रसंगों में मिलता है। जब एक व्यक्ति बुद्ध को खूब गालियां देता है पर वो जरा भी विचलित नही होते। शिष्य के पूंछने पर उसे समझाते हैं कि भई जब वो गालियां मैने स्वीकार ही नहीं कीं तो वो तो उसी के पास रही ना। मुझे लगी ही नही। मुझे उससे क्या फर्क पडता है।

सो नया तो कुछ भी नही है, बचपन से पढते आ रहे हैं, जीवन में उतार सकें तो बात बने।