But I started the night with my true homeskillets, the democrats. That’s where the party was at anyway. Over 800 people milled around the Ames High cafeteria, discussing platform points and munching on the complimentary (ok, donation-based) meals of hot dogs, veggies, and Pepsi.

A mediocre but culturally diverse band played covers of John Lennon hits.

Nose-touchers not excluded.

I watched in envy as an Occupy representative stuffed six foil-wrapped, “donation-based” hot dogs down the front of his jacket.

The actual platform building process was quite lively as well, with people standing on chairs, holding up “Healthcare, Not Warfare” posters, and shouting.

The Occupy guy did all of these things while downing four bags of potato chips.

Around 6:30, I returned to my precinct’s GOP meeting point, which just so happened to be in the high school as well. The first thing I noticed was a lack of free food. The second thing I noticed was the silence: when I walked into the multi-purpose room, only a handful of the two dozen people already seated were speaking, and in hushed voices at that. They’re onto me, I thought, averting my eyes from what felt like a seething collective gaze.

The awkwardness attenuated very little as more caucus goers filtered in, but at least the quiet made eavesdropping easy. I heard one woman make the confusing declaration, “I never thought I’d end up switching to the GOP ticket, but I’ve just been so disappointed with the choice I made in the last election.” This woman was wearing a Rick Perry Shirt.

And in a whiny conversation about all of the telephone campaigning, I overheard, “…yeah, I got a phone call from some Hispanic girl named Maria, telling me to go out and caucus. What was that about?”

A man directly behind me told his friend about his quest to find the multi-purpose room, claiming that the greeter for the Democratic caucus only said, “Um yeah, those people are meeting elsewhere,” when he asked where he could find the Republican meeting area. His accusations of rudeness may have been valid, but it’s equally likely that he was just jealous of the hot dogs.

Despite all of this less than pithy political commentary, I honestly expected to see more Stephen Bloom stereotypes to lampoon: an infinite sea of meth heads, or platoons of drunk dudes in DayGlo jumpsuits. There was a fair amount of  hunting hats and Carhart overalls, but my so-called “unique” sense of style didn’t stick out in the crowd. Indeed, several other people seemed to be even more challenged than I in the art of dressing themselves. The man sitting right next to me sported shoulder-length hair, a track suit with “www.trailerdepot.net” advertised on the back, and a blue beret. The man next to him looked like a wooly sweater-marshmallow stuffed into an undersized tweed jacket. Several guys my age on the other side of the room were clearly still wearing the same jeans they wore in the 7th grade, as the cuffs stopped mid-ankle standing, mid-calf sitting down.

Not to my surprise, all of these people ended up being fellow Ron Paul followers.

Let me be clear: it is very unlikely that I would vote for Paul in the general election. While I strongly support some of his campaign (foreign policy), I adamantly disagree with other aspects of it (anti-abortion laws). Arguably his most important plank, economic reform, is something in which I have little expertise and cannot defend one way or the other. My reason for temporary Democratic traiterdom was twofold:

1) I want the 2012 election to be interesting. The chance that I’d vote for Ron Paul is slim, but the chance that I’d vote for Romney or Santorum is non-existent. I’d have to do some research and some deep thinking in the weeks preceding a Paul/Obama face-off. In any other case I’d automatically tick the Democratic box in the voting booth.

2) I wanted to do my part in boxing out the unacceptable candidates. Like I said, I want the 2012 election to be interesting, not scary. Ron Paul’s crazysauce makes me feel uncomfortable  the same way that chicken on my waffles makes me feel uncomfortable. Theocrats like Bachmann and Santorum make me uncomfortable in the same way that my pants being full of fire ants makes me uncomfortable.

Well, thanks to the hoard of poorly-dressed misfits, Ron Paul won my precinct by a landslide. Unfortunately, the state-wide votes are in, and it looks like PhD in Derpology Rick Santorum took the derptastic cake. C’mon, Iowa, have you seen this guy’s campaign photos?

I don’t think Iowa will be indicative of the rest of the race for GOP candidacy. Look at what happened four years ago–Huckabee had a similar profile, but he didn’t have much staying power after he won here.

No, I’m only upset about tonight’s outcome because Stephen Bloom is probably sitting in his “hiding place” in New York right now, chuckling to himself and saying, I told you so.

[Edit]: Ok, so technically Romney won. By 8 votes? Not enough to matter. I’m still disappointed in us.

Free dogs and chili from The Stand (but no beer)!

Dog and chili lovers rejoice! The Stand is coming to Frugal Festival Food! in LA on June 25 and bringing FREE samples of its tasty hot dogs and chili. Yesssss!

This local LA chain is famous for their super frugal Monday $1 dog nights. Now that is a deal you can’t beat! Make sure to get a free Stand Card to get the $1 dogs and 5% off all purchases. The Stand now offers a la carte ordering, so you can get any entree, sides, or fries on its own.

The Stand has locations in Encino, Woodland Hills, Century City, and Westwood Village. I used to eat at The Stand all the time way back when I was a reporter at the LA Daily News. You can’t beat local, tasty, and cheap!

Who’s excited for all the free food at Frugal Festival? Yozen Frogurt will be passing out free samples and Albertsons has lots of fresh fruit to share. Plus there will be free water, lemonade, and otter pops!

Get your tickets now!

I have been asked by members of the community if they can attend a Stonewall Meeting especially when they have great speakers even if you are not gay or transgender.

The answer is YES! Don’t hesitate for a moment! It takes our entire community to fight for equal rights. You can also make donations to the cause in order to support on the ground local activism by dedicated activists in our community. Straight but not narrow minded supporters are always welcome.

From the official announcement below:

The second Wednesday of each month is Stonewall Democratic Club of Southern Nevada’s general membership meeting

This month we have some very special guests: Former Congresswoman, Professor Dina Titus, Clark County Commissioner and candidate for Las Vegas Mayor, Larry Brown and Kelly Smith of QVegas Magazine

We hope you can join us this Wednesday, March 9th, at The Hot Dog Guy (http://hotdogguylv.com/) on 1122 E. Charleston Boulevard (cross street is Maryland Parkway) at 6pm

Reports will be given on the following:
-Transform Nevada and the Gay and Lesbian Task Force’s AB211 (Nevada’s employment non-discrimination act) phone-banking

-PLAN’s AB211 lobbying

-Testimony on SB180 (Nevada’s hate crimes bill).

-Volunteer opportunities for the Democratic Party and candidates

-Equality Days

-regular business (treasurers report, membership, etc)

We hope to see you Wednesday for some activism, fun and free hot dogs!

Well I’ll tell ya:

FRIDAY, JANUARY 14th, 2011

Start out nibbling on $2 Vegan Buffalo Wings at Food Swings in Williamsburg.  [Unbelievable].

Pre-gaming? Why not? Go get sloshed with some $7 Pitchers of Rudy’s blonde.  [Start your own party at the internet jukebox while you're at it.  Oh and don't forget the free hot dogs].

Cheap date? Try free pool or ping pong and $3 dollar beers/$5 dollar mixed drinks till 9 o’clock at Break in Astoria.

Get there early enough and you can enjoy a damn cheap PBR at Pete’s Candy Store. [Pretty damn cool music venue every night too in the back.  Banjoist, King Crow and his ladyfriend, Sarah King on at 9]. 

Oh, you say you’re drunk right now and want to munch on greasy grub? Nab some free tots at Trash Bar.  But, seriously dude, don’t abuse the privelege.

Feeling Olde Thymey? How’s about double fisting it with $5 Double Mug Dueceys at McSorley’s. [You can't go wrong with saw dust on the floor. Reminds me of the ol' Village Idiot days, gettin' plunked in the head with peanut shells..oh and the smell, I'll never forget that smell].

That’s right, Bill and Ted.  Strange things truly are afoot.

$1/2 HERE = 2 FREE

$1/3 peelie = .16 each

Also a good Fareway deal:

Van de Kamp frozen fish products 4.49 – BOGOF coupon HERE = 2.25 each FREE vegs wyb the fish  (These were $6+ for the fish and $2+ for the vegs at NF, but I PM’d and got both for 4.49!)

You can PM these deals at other stores: NoFrills (132/Center does not carry 12-oz package of hot dogs), SuperSaver, WalMart.

Our Savior Lutheran Church and School loves pool parties! They’ve already had two this Summer, one at Walter Fuller Pool (July 24) and the other at Northwest Pool (Aug. 7). They rented out these pools for the evening and told all the OSLC&S families to come out and bring their neighbors with them. They heard there would be FREE hot dogs and swimming and came running. The Walter Fuller Pool Party had a good turnout, but shortly into it one of Florida’s typical Summer afternoon thunderstorms crashed the party. Everyone huddled together for warmth and chowed down on a delicious chocolate cake by Debbie Murray and the Reitz ladies.

Steph W. was proud to deliver this cake to the church.

This past Saturday’s party at Northwest Pool went much more smoothly; the rained didn’t start until 7:00. Families were swimming together and playing with each other’s kids. Others took advantage of lounge chairs and talked the evening away. Jim Adams and Joe Niska were our Grill Masters and kept the hot dogs coming. Big kids lined up at the diving boards, while little guys, like my 3-year-old Alistair, watched them do cannonballs, flips and dives. Later the lifeguards hosted a game of Sharks and Minnows in the rain.

Dig in, Alistair!

The entire time, Pastor Burtzlaff, Pastor Drew and Mr. Crosmer made their rounds, talking to all the families about their summers and plans for the Fall school year. For the first half of the day, many of these moms and dads were busy painting, hauling, cleaning, and organizing the school. They really needed a relaxing swim after hours of hard work. Great job, Mr. Crosmer, teachers, parents and even grandparents! To see photos from the Work Day at Our Savior St. Pete, click here and to see the Northwest Pool party photos, click here.

Now that I’ve made you feel bad for missing out, I’ll tell you that there will be a third pool party this weekend. Please join us for our final night swimming and grilling at the St. Pete Beach Recreation Center, located at 7701 Boca Ciega Drive. We’ll be there on Saturday (Aug. 14) from 5:30p.m. until 7:30p.m. serving up hot dogs, chips and lemonade for the masses. This is a free event; just bring your swimsuit, towel and friends! If you have any questions, please contact the church office 727-344-2684.

For more details, call 941-408-8088.

If you live in North Port or Port Charlotte and want to ride with Joy, be at her house at 5:10 p.m.  (There are a limited number of seats in her van, so let her know ASAP if you will be riding with her.)

See you Friday!!!!!  And bring your friends!

Perfect Timing

Yes, it’s officially that special time of year again.  Memorial Day weekend…. the Super Bowl of auto sales.  Everyone who is looking for that “deal of the century” will either find it now or never.  The weather is perfect for Toyota’s Perfect Timing event taking place during North Hollywood Toyota’s Memorial Day Sell-A-Thon.  The two events combined spell one thing for savvy consumers… GINORMOUS savings!

Visit North Hollywood Toyota and Scion of North Hollywood this weekend and join the fun.  Free hot dogs, shaved ice, cold water, and sodas will be available during most of Saturday and Sunday.  Special savings on select new and used vehicles will be announced on the North Hollywood Toyota website at midnight tonight and the adwill hit newstands Saturday morning.

Stay ahead of the curve and make an appointmnet today.  There are two Sell-A-Thon hotlines.  Reach new or used dept’s at the numbers below:

• NEW CAR SALES – 800.800.6730
• PRE-OWNED and CERTIFIED USED CAR SALES – 800.731.8869

I admit, I’m not a big fan of hot dogs, but FREE is FREE and you can always donate these to a neighborhood picnic or food bank.

Visit http://kraft.promotions.com/ombeeffranks/ and register ASAP!

You might say that this post is posted out of context to my blog… but i really don’t care. Some of you smarter people may have had the life changing revelation that i don’t care what most of you think. So you might come back with a comment in retaliation to that statement such as; “why post a blog if you dont care what other people think?” My only response to that would be “Why not”.

“Yes… Yes i am real”