This isn’t happiness.™ Peter Nidzgorski

Apes, capes, and marriage: the truth of it all.

Found on ffffound.com

1. Why do airports still have screens displaying arriving flights in the gate area when the only people who can go through security are people who are leaving? Please tell me what I’m missing here.

2. Can’t they figure out a better way to package eggs? By my estimation, approximately half of all egg cartons in the supermarket have at least one broken egg. This seems very wasteful.

3. If someone developed a fragrance called “New Baby Smell”, they would sell a lot of it.

4. Mini-vans should have sensors on the sides which beep when you’re too close to the side of the garage. Another option would be to make sure that the color of the van is the same as the paint color of the garage.

5. Don’t keep pet monkeys in your house. Seriously. Or this will happen.

6. Why does the water in the public-restroom sink only turn on after I STOP waving my hand in front of the sensor?

7. I read a statistic that 2% of people respond to SPAM. I’m dying to know who these people are and what they’re thinking.

8. Clorox Bleach-Free Hand-Sanitizer? Really? Sorry, Clorox, you can say “bleach-free” on the package, but Clorox = bleach, and I’m not putting bleach on my hands.

And those are the things I’ve been thinking about.

but I swear I’m not twelve…

Besides the normal Monday night programming I have recorded ( House, HIMYM, Big Bang Theory, Gossip Girl) here is what else is currently on my DVR ( in case you had any doubts about how cool I am)

Bridge to Terabithia (the new one – I’m a little nervous it will not be as good as the book or the original movie so I haven’t watched it yet)
Camp Rock (sadly, I’ve already seen this, but I recorded it anyways)
Hannah Montana
Hannah Montana
Hocus Pocus (Only, the best Halloween movie EVER – a muck, a muck, a muck, a muck)
Robin Hood (the cartoon – recorded 2/1/09, still waiting for my brother to come over and watch it with me – maybe Thanksgiving)
Shrek the Third
The Santa Clause
Wizards of Waverly Place
Wizards of Waverly Place
Wizards of Waverly Place

this is her new favorite expression…melts my heart…and makes me laugh…at the same time. who doesn’t love a little scrunched up nose and a gummy smile?

hehe…I will share some funny conversations below ^__^ and of course, I will not use the real name. It’s confidential hahaha…Enjoy it!!

Boss: so,P?what do you think?Do you want a business class or economy class?
P: Why do you ask me?of course, I would say business class… ^__^;;
Boss: But…I have to spent double for the business class…
P: So why do you ask me then?just buy me the economy class.
Boss: But I want to know what you think, would you prefer business class or economy class
P: ok,Boss…Just buy me the economy class then, no need to ask me @__@ *everybody will say business class??!!
In the end, P got business class for the ticket hahaha…

D: Ozone is like when the rain is over, the smell of the wet dirt is ozone…
P: ??what??no…no…ozone is the layer in the sky…
D: Nooo…it’s the smell of the wet dirt after the rain…
Boss: ok..ok…maybe in place where he lives, its called ozone
P: ok…A..if I ask you what is ozone, what do you say?
A: its some kind of layer in the sky which protected us from the sun.
P: ok…how about you,M?
M: same with A of course…
P: see????why does he keep saying ozone is the smell of the wet dirt??

Boss: I saw you limping from yesterday. What happen to your foot,T?
T: haha…It’s because I have uric acid and I ate seafood yesterday…
Boss: you are not kicking D in Apartment, aren’t you?

Boss: The customer would need the printer,C
C: ok…
Boss: I think I’ve seen the printer somewhere here…But why its not here?
C: I don’t know, maybe somebody has taking it to the another customer
Boss: You’re not selling them to the black market,right?

S: It’s 4 right?right?right?
A: S!!just tell me the number!!
S: It’s 4 right?right?right?
A: geez…why does he always say right?what about left?

P: Have you ever played paintball?
M: yes…we have one at home but never play it…
P: I think we should play before you go home, and ooh…we will make Boss as the target…
M & T: hahahahahaha…

I might as well not even date them anymore – I haven’t been very good at keeping this weekly, and today, everything I’m going to write is from yesterday, so really this is more like “My Thursday in TV” (to appease my sister, I’m adding this warning – this is all about shows from last night.  If you don’t want to know what happened, stop reading)

Community – I absolutely loved the scene that wrapped up all the story lines while Troy and Abed sang “Somewhere Out There” If you are not watching this show, you should be ashamed of yourself.

Parks & Recreation – I don’t usually like the multiple takes thing, but I about died when Leslie was trying to convince the Ranger that she shot Ron. I still can’t get over how much better this show is than it was last year.

Grey’s Anatomy – Come on. First we have to get use to the idea that McSteamy is a Dad and then they just throw in that his 18 year old daughter is pregnant. I don’t know if I can buy him as a grandpa. That’s just weird.

Private Practice – Reverand Camden as the philandering Captain. As much as I like Stephen Collins, I’m not buying this either. Way to bum me out this week ABC.

Most notable absence: Vampire Diaries – Big Shock – I didn’t even watch this one yet. I didn’t get home from work until almost 8 so I went with the comedies instead to lighten things up.

Cool News: Chuck – It may not be the best present I could think of for my 29th birthday, but I’m super super excited that Chuck is coming back on Jan 10th/11th instead of after the Olympics in March. Way to go NBC – this is totally worth having to revise the programming on all my 1Q buys (and that is saying a lot about how much I love this show)

I don’t really care, but you might: Lost is coming back Tuesdays at 9 on February 2nd.

Sochi 2014?

a new version of the history to our world.very funny and also interesting.enjoy it

Online banking is great, I can log in and check my account, make payments without writing checks or going to the bank etc… that’s awesome … But if ever you need to speak to a “human” (I use quotation marks not because I am NOT referring to the homo sapiens but rather some of the people that work at the bank are sometimes too dumb to be considered as part of our race, as you will see shortly)…

So I logged in and saw a debit which I could not identify (of only 49$, but still… I am referring to my commercial bank account) and picked up the phone and left a message for my account manager. 24 hrs later I get a call from her and she tells me she doesn’t know… (it took her 24hrs to figure that out?) and that I need to send a fax to another woman at the bank (in the SAME building) so she can call me back and give me the details of the transaction. Yes, yes, you read correctly: my commercial bank account manager at a bank (in downtown Montreal), is asking me to send a fax, to her colleague, who works 2 floors down from her, so that person can call me to tell me why I have an unauthorized debit in my account. Ok… so I keep my cool, and I write the fax: “Dear so-and-so, please call me I would like to ask a question about a debit on Nov 16, etc…”.

A few hours later that day, (still no call) I end up going at the bank to make some deposits, and the cashier talks to the person in question who recognizes me:

Bank woman- “Mr. Chamy, are you the one who sent me the fax earlier today?”

Anthony – “Yes, that’s me “

I have a big smile on my face since I realize that the issue will most likely be resolved in the next 30 seconds. I continue:

Anthony – “I wanted to identify this debit, but first, I wanted to know, is there no way for my bank account manager to reach you? I don’t understand why she called me and asked me to send you a fax for you to call me, I mean, it is… (and I was going to say ridiculous but I held back)…

Bank woman – “Well of course, Mr. Chamy, I mean, she is on another floor, she works in another department!”

…

My smile slowly fades away…

…

What I would have liked to say at this moment is: “You mean to tell me that it is simpler for her to pick up the phone, call her client (me), then have the client send you a fax asking you to have you call them back, and then you pick up the phone and call – instead of having her just contact you (by phone, e-mail, or just walk down 2 floors)?! You work in the same building for crying out loud! Are you serious? What freakin’ planet do we live on here? You guys are a major bank, how can you possible function properly this way? I am at a loss for words, this is insulting my intelligence…”

But I end up holding myself back (I assume thanks to Daniel Goleman’s book: Emotional Intelligence) since I know that to upset the ladies that deposit your company cheques must not be a good thing and I just swallow my anger and respond very calmly (with a new and improved smile of course):

Anthony – “Ah ok, well… what is that debit anyway, I did not authorize it so I’d like to know what it is”…

Bank woman – “Ah well yes, I was going to call you Mr. Chamy, to tell you that I do not know what this debit transaction is, you will have to talk to your account manager.”

My smile quickly disappears for good…

…

At this point I just squeezed my mouth shut so as not to scream any profanities, and walked away…

To be continued…

I won't mention which bank it is

something funny ) enjoy it

it makes me laugh cause the reality changes every day.imagine just some old people how are forced to work untill them life is finish.it’s not fair…what is your opinion about this?it’s good that someone to work untill 67 years old or not?

how do you imagine the school in 40 years?better then today or worst?
i think that the learners will be on the seat of the teachers )

I’m a brat when it comes to manicures. I always need my nails to be perfect and have a hard time finding a manicurist I love. It’s not only because I’m picky, which I am, but it has mostly to do with the fact that I used to bite my nails and, unless they’re perfect, I bite and pick until I have no nails or cuticle, and that’s yucky. My pickiness also extends to nail art. I’d never do it. ever. I just don’t like how it looks, but you have to admire the girl from The Daily Nail.

She not only finds creative ways to decorate her nails, but she does it every single day. Talk about sticking to something. She’s been at it since only September 30th and I wonder how long she’ll be able to come up with unique things. She has some quirky and hilarious nail designs. Here are some of the funniest ones.

Does it make me neurotic that I couldn’t stop thinking that her cuticles won’t survive this ordeal?

do you want something new?something interesting?with many advantages and not soo expensive?…here is the solution what do you waiting for? just…buy it!

he is my favorit actor.everytime i watch his movies i laugh with tears
enjoy it

…which means it’s calendar time! I love calendars. They are cheap art. Sometimes I save a page or two from past years’ calendars and use them as art. I’m a big fan. Here is the one I want this year:

That’s right. It’s the Cats Let Nothing Darken Their Roar calendar. And shame on you if you’ve never heard of it. Problem is, it’s $41 including shipping. So it’s very unlikely I’ll actually get it. If you feel like buying it for me though, you can do so here.

So what calendar will I get instead? While passing the calendar kiosk at the mall, I immediately saw this gem:

Yay! A Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog calendar! “What’s that?” you say? Click here and watch it. You will not regret it.

Last bit of calendar inspired news: When I was showing my mom the one I want in the store, we overheard a man say in a super hillbilly voice “I wanna get Junior one with a pig on it!” I know this was his real voice because everyone he was with also talked like this. He repeated his desire to get Junior a pig calendar several times as he purused the animal section. Rest assured, readers, his quest ended in success. Junior is one lucky son of a gun.