London kind and funny
The guy I work with has really bad spots all over his face.
He has the nickname E9
It’s the london postcode for acne
1 day, 4 hours
My wife said she was leaving me because of my obsession with bodybuilding.
I could feel the weightlifting from my shoulders.
2 days, 5 hours
My girlfriend says I commit to things too quickly.
She sounds just like my fourth wife.
3 days, 5 hours
What’s the best way to prevent crying when chopping an onion?
Don’t form an emotional bond with the onion prior to cutting.
4 days, 5 hours
I asked this bird back to my place, and she was looking through my books.
“How come you’ve got so many copies of ‘War and Peace?’” she asked. 7 more words
5 days, 4 hours
Patient: Doctor, doctor. I’ve come out in spots like cherries on a cake.
Doctor: Ah, you must have analogy.
1 week, 1 day
A facebook friend has died.
We’re all shocked. It’s such sad news. He was brilliant on it. One of the best.
We’ll never see his like again
1 week, 2 days