London kind and funny
Archaeologists digging on a Pyramid in Egypt have found a mummy covered in chocolate and nuts. Experts believe it to be Pharaoh Rocher.
2 hours, 1 minute
My wife claimed that onions couldn’t make her cry providing she had a teaspoon in her mouth.
I told her that this theory was absolute nonsense and asked her to prove it. 34 more words
3 days, 3 hours
Looking forward to getting paid so I can finally buy some deodorant.
Roll on Friday.
4 days, 2 hours
A Banker, A Daily Mail reader and a refugee are sitting at a table sharing 12 biscuits. The banker takes 11 and says to the daily mail reader, Watch out for the refugee, he wants your biscuit.
5 days, 2 hours
I oink, therefore I ham
6 days, 3 hours
I bought my friend an elephant for his room.
He said, “Thanks”. I said, “Don’t mention it”.
I got arrested whilst chasing some long legged birds on the lakeside yesterday.
I said to the copper “What do you think you can charge me with?”
“Storking” came the reply
1 week, 3 days