My mom is Jewish and my dad’s Salvadorean, that combo makes me a Jewtina. Thankfully, there is a clothing line for people like me but there isn’t a special restaurant that combines the two cuisines. Fortunately, this last week I had the best Jewish deli sandwich of my life and some great Salvadorean food.

There are some iconic LA restaurants that I am simply in no rush to try. For instance, it took me 5 years to try a Father’s Office burger. The reason for my hesitation is normally anticipated and then actual disappointment. That is not the case with Langer’s Deli. I have wanted to go for the last 5 years but their hours, never open past 4pm and closed on Sundays, have been a barrier for me. When Josie called and said that she was so sorry she missed roller disco and asked how she could make it up to me, I immediately had a resolution. I had to get my car serviced and suggested that she pick me up at Toyota and that we grab lunch at Langer’s. She was totally game and we arrived with rather large appetites. The location of Langer’s, in the heart of MacArthur Park, brings to mind smells of urine and memories of purchasing my first fake ID. We are tough girls and walked in to a packed lunch crowd. The hostess took down my name and said it would be a 20 minute wait. I spotted a seat at the counter and there was a second that appeared to be opening up quickly. A nice Jewish man was in the middle of the two empty seats offered to scoot down for us. He ended up chatting with the cute younger woman, soon to be seatmate, all about her upcoming wedding. Josie and I were thrilled and I told her that all of our Twitter friends said we must stick to the Number 19. We didn’t stray. Josie, not a huge rye fan, asked for sourdough and we decided to split an order of fries. The waitress was quick talking and clearly a New Yorker. When Josie asked me if we needed to clarify to the waitress about the order, since she didn’t write anything down, I stopped her. I could tell this woman has been doing this for years and had the order perfect and with no confusion. I was correct.

The number 19 has thick pieces of pastrami, swiss cheese, coleslaw, and russian dressing. In the words of Joe Jackson, “Nineteen Forever!” It was so OMG! Anyone that knows me knows that I am a huge bread snob and this rye was fresh and perfect. I think Josie ended up regretting her sourdough choice. I would normally be the quintessential Jew and complain about paying nearly $14 for a sandwich, but not here. It was so worth it. Those complaints can be saved for the always disappointing and overpriced Jerry’s Deli. I do not necessarily heart New York but I do love a good NYC deli where people come from all walks of life and chat over a good sandwich. That is what happened at Langer’s and it was all delectable! If you live in LA and have not been, this is a place that is not to be missed.

Josie and I share some Salvadorean blood but rarely do we eat the food together. We are far more likely to head to Highland Park together for huaraches and tacos or to San Gabriel for Chinese food (the other food of the Jewish people) than to seek out some pupusas. Although, we were asked at one point if we like to bump pupusas together. It’s on tape, in case you don’t believe us. Anyway, Josie is now on her 11th iPhone and while she was at the Apple store, or as she like to call it the home of her saviors, I handed her my BlackBerry (I am only on my 2nd) and told her to use the Yelp app and find us somewhere for dinner. She chose La Caravana, which is pretty far up Lake in Pasadena, nearly at the Altadena border. I agreed but walked in with very low expectations. After my first sip of the ensalada, a fresh fruit drink, I was sold. Never have I had such a refreshingly delicious beverage. As soon as I saw the menu I knew that I needed the Plato Tipico Loco, which translates to the typical crazy plate. We are Uncouth Gourmands how could we not order that? It came with your choice of pupusa, a sweet corn tamale, fried yucca, plantain, mixed rice and beans, a slice of queso fresco, and sour cream. I went with the chicken and cheese pupusa and Josie was torn between the zucchini and cheese and the loroco. Despite the vast amount of food, she ordered both. All the food was delicious and the plate was only ten dollars, which is a good deal considering an individual pupusa is $3. I know that it isn’t that much but I have a hard time justifying more than a $1.50 for a taco and more than $2.50 for a pupusa. All of the food was superb and Josie and I were screaming at each other to try this or try that. We had identical plates but that didn’t stop us from sharing.

Whatever your cultural background may be, might I suggest that you partake in gobbling its culinary roots. You will feel proud, satiated, and it is a good thing to be on the hunt for. Everyone loves finding the “Best” something and it might as well be something that your ancestors have loved and enjoyed.

Chuck always says to us, “Ladies, you have to lose in order to really appreciate the good.” This was one of those losing times for the UG girls. Here’s a recap of lunch at The Jonathan Club Beach and our entry for this year’s Tabletop Shootout.

It is without fail that every time we visit the JC Beach, Chef Benjamin always prepares a memorable meal for the UG girls. To throw a little surprise twist to the story, I met Chuck there on time. Anyone that knows me knows that on time for Josie usually means 15 minutes late, but this time I was early. Chuck summoned me in to the facilities and I got a private tour of the kitchen, which Chef Ben uses to experiment on us with new flavor combinations that never fail.

As always the meal started off with the JC’s famous zucchini muffins, bread, madeleines and, of course, fresh butter. From there we moved on to the first course which consisted of baby beets on top of heirloom tomatoes and two neat formation packets of coagulated yogurt and cranberry goat cheese served with a beet vinaigrette. The first course was light and airy. If any heaviness, whatsoever, could be identified it came from inherent qualities of the goat cheese and yogurt which delicately teetered on masterful. For the second course heaviness exploded, but only in that good way that can only be fully appreciated when you only have a few bites to savour and the fullness doesn’t leave you over satiated but rather, longing for more. We had a small piece of  veal osso bucco over polenta which was paired with a single wagyu beef ravioli over braised carrots. Beyond that, I, Josie did not get to try any of the desserts because this is where the plot was foiled. Apparently, our competition at our next stop, The Girari Tabletop Shootout, was not what we expected and our partner there said we would need more time than we anticipated. We were nervous! I left lunch early to assure our victory (maybe not so much victory). I heard that the girls at lunch: Dawson aka Miss SauceLA and Carina helped themselves to chai creme brulee and an assorted berry Bavarian cream florentine. The Jonathan Club Beach and Chef Benjamin delivered just like they have on our previous visits.

The Verdict:

Food: Thumbs-up

Service: Thumbs-up

Character: Thumbs-up

Ambiance: Thumbs-up

Uncertain of how to pull all of it together, I arrived panicked only to find out our team mate had already left because she was too embarrassed and didn’t want us to embarrass ourselves. We thought defeat without trying was more embarrassing, so we forged on. We decided to go ad hoc decorating and put together what you above. Constructed with less than $40, we used paper, paint, Taco Bell sporks, and recycled paper cups to build our display.  We aptly positioned it as an Andy Warhol inspiration and which we topped with what else, Campbell’s Soup and the new coke bottles. Much like Warol changed the way people saw art, we wanted to change the way people perceived the dining table experience. We wanted the people sitting at the table to be challenged and stimulated. We also find it necessary to mix high brow and low brow food and bring it to the masses.

The evening was great. We got to munch on snacks, drink fancy lattes, and mingle with some very talented party planners. Were the other designs better? The other designs were more traditional and showy and it was definitely apparent that we were by far the most “avant garde” competitor, but we were proud of our design because it fully encapsulated us as a young, modern, and uncouth brand. To some people the other pieces might’ve been better, but we were by no means, embarrased with anything we produced. If anything, we would’ve been embarrassed to produce something that didn’t fully represent us. This was us!

So I suppose it was one of those losing nights for these girls. We left the Luxe Hotel with a mix of emotions. We were happy, sad, disappointed, and proud all at once. Our lawyer once told us that we were the most persistent and relentless girls he’d ever met. With that said, the UG journey continues. That is, one meal at a time.

Unfortunately, UncouthGourmands.com didn’t have any gross revenues last month so I, Josie, had to return to my normal 9-5 gig. After my first day back, I left the office hungry. What, everyone doesn’t eat compulsively at their desk in corporate America?! I miss the UG headquarters but mostly, I miss Carina. The one silver lining was that I knew someone else was probably hungry as well… Ms. Ost. So I called my pal, Carina-Lu, and I was right.  She was starving. I guess my absence gave her the heartbreak diet because she hadn’t eaten all day. We decided to try out The Counter, as it  just opened recently in Pasadena and we’ve been hearing great things about it. Little did we know that the UG Girls would embark upon a Pasadena food renaissance.

The space was hip and thoughtful. There’s no stale artwork on the wall, but instead skateboards and colorful urban paintings. The staff is young and the “dineresque” warmth of the place is comforting and easy. A perfect first date place for those that want to just have a playful and unassuming time. Despite it being a Wednesday night, the place was packed with locals. We were seated at a small corner table and were handed a sheet of paper and a pencil. The fate of our burger was now in our hands. I opted for the very rare 1/3lb patty with caramelized onions, maytag blue cheese, garlic aoili, a fried egg, tomatoes, and wild arugula. The waitress looked at my ticket and said I had chosen the best mix on the menu. I felt proud! Carina also took the 1/3lb patty but medium rare with swiss cheese, grilled onions, sauteed mushrooms, mixed greens, and a dijon balsamic. Here are the brilliant burger options, what would you choose?

We split an order of  ½  fries and ½ onion rings. The french fries were no McDonald’s, however, it was the thin onion ringlets that captivated most of my attention throughout the meal.  A little too greasy, but in that good kind of way. You know, the “it’s so bad, it’s good” kind of pleasure – which for the UG girls has been consisting of more food less sex kind of experiences. *Sigh*

Carina, the bread snob, didn’t love the buns but I didn’t find them in any way offensive. In fact, I was in love! The 1/3lb burger was plenty large and ended up with fries and beverage being about $15 each. Like clockwork the UG girls got shorted once again when in this case, we showed up a day early. It was Wednesday and well despite being packed, the night to come to The Counter is Thursday. It is on Thursday’s that they have a DJ spinning and you can get their four mini burger sliders and four taster size beers for $12. Oh well, we left full and happy. I know that Comme Ca was the NY Times best pick for burger, but the UG girls disagree because The Counter produced exactly what these girls were in need of – a Pasadena food revival that would continue into the week at Louise’s Trattoria.

Thursday was a night of estranged friends. Our newest intern, Wendy, joined us in trying the newest menu at Louise’s Trattoria. The “new” Louise’s Trattoria features a new menu, new logo, and best of all, new lower prices. Our estranged Jewish friend, Nathan, who’s doing PR for the restaurant also joined us. I, of course, ran in late with my two complimentary Ice Blended drinks which Coffee Bean heavily promoted on Twitter. I heart Twitter! It turned out that our intern, Wendy, knew our friend Nathan. Who did we know at the restaurant?  No one. Leave it to the UG girls to recruit a more popular intern than themselves! Regardless, the meal started off well because we were handed a copious amount of focaccia bread and were set to order. The menu at Louise’s has dramatically changed for the better and we were eager to see what new inspirations we were about to try. I always judge a place by its caesar salad so I opted for that as my first course; I was not left disappointed. Carina on the other hand went for the house salad, which despite always being uninspiring at most restaurants, was a joy to eat at Louise’s. The house salad had goat cheese, sun-dried tomatoes and a lemon vin. “Yum” just doesn’t begin to describe it. Our entrees came next, I ordered the Chicken Pomodoro on basil spaghetti and Carina ordered the Chicken Balsamico, which was served with braised spinach and veggies. Both entrees were great deals at just $12. There was plenty of food and we laughed the whole time; we felt right at home. Carina kept it classy and left a bit of food on her plate, but not me. I finished the whole entree and, in fact, when the waiter came to pick up our plates, he was astonished when he saw I ate all my food. He remarked that he’s never seen a woman finish a plate of Chicken Pomodoro. I’m a remarkable woman – too bad the boy I used to love doesn’t see that. We finished off the Pasadena meal with a slice of hummingbird cake, which was a sweet end to our night.

Even though we had finished our meal, the staff was in no rush to hurry us along. We sat at the table for about an hour or so gabbing it up to Nathan about our newest UG developments. Before leaving Louise’s we noticed one thing, apparently the day to come in was Friday and Saturday. It is on Friday and Saturday that Louise’s has a 1/2 off a bottle of wine menu. It was Thursday! Leave it to the UGs to show up a day early every time. It’s no wonder we can’t make a buck.

Ever wonder what all these bloggers in LA look like? Are you annoyed that people critique food but might have no ability to actually cook? Do you wish bloggers would unite for a great cause over the holiday season? Congratulations, readers, you are in luck!

On Saturday, December 5th from 10 AM to 4 PM Zeke’s Smokehouse in West Hollywood will play home to the first annual “Eat My Blog” bake sale. There will be more than 800 baked goods and all reasonably priced between $1-$3!  All proceeds from this delicious event will be donated to the Los Angeles Regional Foodbank.

Want to know what the UGs will be making/baking? Stay tuned….

Here is a list of all participating bloggers:

Anjali (http://deliciouscoma.com/)
Diana (http://dianatakesabite.blogspot.com/)
Laurie (http://gmasbakery.wordpress.com/)
Pat (http://eatingla.blogspot.com/)
Ben (http://bsideblog.com/)
Hong & Kim (http://ravenouscouple.blogspot.com/)
Esi (http://dishingupdelights.blogspot.com/)
Lisa (http://lisatimmons.com/)
Ashley (http://www.placeandtaste.blogspot.com/)
Kate (http://savour-fare.com/)
Chrystal & Amir (http://duodishes.com/)
Jessica (http://www.eatsipchew.com/)
Cathy & Vernon (http://gastronomyblog.com/)
Elyse (http://ehoblogs.blogspot.com/)
Liz (http://www.foodshethought.blogspot.com/)
Gaby (http://whatsgabycooking.com/)
Sonja (http://www.activefoodie.com/)
Carol (http://www.hungrypassport.blogspot.com/)
Sarah (http://www.sarahthebear.com/)
LA Times Food Blog (http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/dailydish/)
Jen (http://www.domdivas.blogspot.com/)
H.C. (http://la-oc-foodie.blogspot.com/)
Jo (http://mylastbite.wordpress.com/)
Matt (http://www.mattatouille.com/)
Andrea (http://laeasymeals.com/)
Nastassia (http://www.theletmeeatcake.blogspot.com/)
Amy (http://theroamingbelly.blogspot.com/)
Anisha (http://foodismynish.blogspot.com/)
Erica (http://blogs.laweekly.com/squidink/)
Liz (www.whiningndining.com)
Mary (www.foodlibrarian.com)
Josie & Carina (http://uncouthgourmands.com/)
Jennifer (http://www.peteeatemall.com/)

We’ll see you there, go get your sweet on!

Josie and I have attended a great deal of food events this year. Sometimes we are on the list, sometimes we are not, and sometimes we volunteer just to attend. This was our first year at the Great Chefs of LA and we were more involved in this event than any other. We had the honor to be guest judges on the 944 Webfire Challenge webisode and got to give away two tickets in our contest. We somehow ended up with enough tickets, through being on the media list and after our investor already purchased us two tickets, that we got to bring dates. Shocking, I know. It has become clear that most of readers just assume we are lesbians. We are still photographed dateless, so let the rumors continue.

One of the first people I saw on the way in was Andee of LA Easy Meals. It was the first time we met her but she was our contest winner and one of the people we wanted to meet most. She was so sweet and looks identical to one of our good friends who is also a marathon runner and foodie. Our friend Lauren, Andee’s lookalike, can be seen in third picture on this post. Maybe it was her similar appearance or her food and business knowledge but we are sure that she is a new UG friend! Plus, she described better than anyone what it means to be a UG.

Carina’s Favorites:

We mention it all the time but Josie has an unfortunate allergy to seafood. It is not a problem for me, Carina, because it means I can always order it when I want her to not steal my food. Or I can have dates take me to my favorite restaurant, Boiling Crab, because I never get to go with my UG other half. I have to say that despite my attempts to kill Josie, read the Shrimp Incident, I am really saddened for her because she has to miss out on the best dishes like the scallop on the 1/2 shell from East. It was served with lemongrass sambal, wasabi crème fraîche, shiso dust, and cilantro and was one of the best things I ate all day. Totally fresh and perfectly seasoned. I even got to bare witness to when My Last Bite had her first bite of it and proclaimed it her favorite. Well, I more than watched this, I instigated the entire process demanding she try it immediately.

The other dish I loved was the mushroom soup. Maybe it was their display of fungi but my heart belonged to this creamy soup. This soup was from Giacomino Drago at Il Pastaio in Beverly Hills. Now if only I can find a man that would wear a “I’m a Fungi and people lichen me“  shirt.

Josie’s Favorites:

One of Josie’s favorite’s also had the mushroom theme. It was the delicious wild mushroom risotto from Cecconi. It was the richest dish of the day and it was so beautiful that every plate got shaved parmesan and black truffles only seconds before serving.

Josie’s other favorite of the day was the blood orange and brie panini from Bottega Louie. We have only been to the restaurant once for brunch but we will definitely be returning for dinner in the near future, if anyone wants to join us.

Yes, the main cause and focus of this event was that it raised money for the Southern California Kidney Foundation, an incredible organization, but it also turned the spotlight on the great chefs of LA. The chefs of other cities are sadly more celebrated than our own. It is rather unfortunate and Josie and I want to take a second and recognize our favorite chefs of the city. First off, the amazing Drago Brothers: Celestino, Calogero, Giacomino, and Tanino. These men bring Italian food in LA to a completely different and delicious level. They were all in attendance at the event and they all impressed us to no end.

Our second hats off is to Jorge Chicas from the Bazaar. The clientele may not be our favorite but the food is always so imaginative and a great addition to any event. Plus, I was thrilled to see that hot pastry chef Michael again. I am sure Josie was very happy to see Marcel once again. In case you don’t remember, let’s just say that our first time at the Bazaar brought out a great deal of carnal hunger from the UG girls.

We know that the very talented and funny George Lopez was the host of this event as this is a cause close to his heart/kidney but there were four lovely ladies that may have stolen the show. They were the Strawberrylicious cupcake girls from Leyna’s Kitchen. They were almost as adorable as their cupcakes were yummy!

After the event, my date and I needed a nap (insert wink emoticon) but I told Josie to hit up Laurel Tavern, my favorite bar in the area. It was a good choice as it turned out to be the unofficial after-party for the event. She loved the place as much as I do and raved about the chorizo fondue. Only Josie could want sausage and cheese after a day of eating.

The event was wonderful and we are so thrilled that we got to be so involved. We owe a big thanks to Slife PR and 944 for putting on this event. Another thanks to Girari for their furniture contributions and making us smile all day.

Here our some great recaps from:

My Last Bite

Weezer Monkey

Food Marathon

Food, She Thought

Shop Eat Sleep

A couple of weeks ago we were judges for Great Chefs of LA Webfire Challenge webisode series sponsored by 944 Magazine. The series is hosted by Candace Kumai, The Stiletto Chef of TLC’s “Cook Yourself Thin,” and is all lead up for when she will  be emcee for the big event: The 23rd Annual Great Chefs of Los Angeles.

The event will be on November 8 at the CBS Studio Center in Studio City. The whole event is going to a great cause the National Kidney Foundation of Southern California. Tickets are normally $150 dollars each but we are giving away 2 (a $300 value, for you math challenged). Here is what you need to do to win:

1. Post a comment below describing why you are an Uncouth Gourmand

2. Follow Great Chefs of LA on Twitter @greatchefsofLA and tweet “Enter to win 2 free tix to @greatchefsofLA on @uncouthgourmand -it pays to be a UG http://wp.me/poMGa-Ey”

We will choose the most uncouth answer and all submissions must be received no later than November 5th at 11:59PM.

To sweeten the deal even more there will be a gift bag for all attendees worth $250 and the chefs and wineries there will blow your foodie minds. These are the truly “Great Chefs”:

Our webisode has yet to air but here is some special behind the scenes footage including some great investigating by the UGs with our great chef of the day Jonathan Burrows. Take a look, it might give you some pointers on what it means to be an Uncouth Gourmand.

This weekend was filled with delicious food, wine, and fun. Saturday, after the night on the party bus, I woke up hungover and starving. Thankfully, I had received news that there was going to be a small food event practically in my backyard. I finally got out of bed in the early afternoon and headed to South Lake Avenue in Pasadena for their first annual Taste of South Lake. It wasn’t exactly that high-end but it was free and had the exact type of food I was looking for: free tacos from Rubios, mac and cheese from Magnolia (my favorite mac in Pas), and a $1 burger from The Counter. I asked the guy at The Counter when they would be finally opening their doors and he told me they have been open for three weeks. I was flabbergasted and said, “What?!?! I am a neighbor and a food blogger, how the hell did that happen so quickly?” He laughed and replied, “Don’t you follow us on Twitter?” I am the ultimate Twit but must have somehow overlooked that major fact. My $1 mini burger got me very excited and I look forward to going soon, anyone interested?

It was a nice relaxing time and I watched Chef Jamie make a pumpkin holiday risotto. The whole audience got yummy samples. I am very interested in hearing her radio show on KFWB after learning that an exercise guy was going to come on and teach a pumpkin workout. I think this is a genius plan for keeping in shape over the holidays, you just grab an appropriate sized pumpkin and lift it for a workout…brilliant!

On Sunday, both Josie and I headed separately to a much larger, expensive, and classier event in Malibu. It was the Los Angeles Magazine Food Event. It was very far away but so beautiful. As I was driving deep in to the Santa Monica Mountains and pulling on to the Malibu Family Wines property I saw a beautiful landscape, horses, and zebras. It was such an OMG moment. Josie and I arrived within 2 minutes of one another despite coming from completely opposite directions at different times. As soon as we were walking in we were honked at by the lovely Jo of My Last Bite, or as Josie and I refer to her, “Our Chef Groupie Idol”.

Enough about the gorgeous ambiance, let’s talk food. Josie’s favorites of the day were the risotto balls from Little Dom’s and the butternut squash fritter. She literally sent me up to get her some after she already had two plates. She also instructed that I only bring her back a plate with two balls on it.

My favorites were the spicy tuna in a tempura cone by Hampton’s in the Four Seasons and the crab cakes from Parker’s Lighthouse.

One of the desserts I really enjoyed was the black sesame tangerine terrine from Wilshire Restaurant. I mostly just enjoyed that the chef serving had to utter the tongue twister and watching them slice up the dessert.

Here were some other delectable bites we consumed:

It was a beautiful day, a super classy event for our uncouth selves, and a lot of fun. Towards the end of the event and a couple of glasses of wine in we parked ourselves in princess seating at the Karma Lounge for a Top Chef Panel hosted by Lesley Bargar Suter, the dine editor at Los Angeles Magazine. We listened to Betty Fraser, Chris “CJ “Jacobsen and Fabio Viviani talk about their toughest judge. No surprise to us, the honor went to the Uncouth Gourmands wet dream…Anthony Bourdain. *Swoon*

Josie has the ability to occasionally blow my mind. After making a 5 course birthday dinner for me and a group of people that I invited, which included an LA Weekly food writer, she still felt obliged to take me out. How is that possible? On Friday, after a long day that caused our investor to walk in to our office/conference room with a bottle of wine and gourmet nuts saying that we put in a good week, we still had some energy to go out. Josie let me pick the place and I chose 38 Degrees in Alhambra after reading great things on Yelp, especially from a Yelper that I used to date, and reading their weekly beers on tap from Food GPS’s LA Beer Blast. It’s funny because while I feel like I am in Alhambra all of the time to eat I never go to this downtown area and had no idea how bustling it was on a Friday night. Everyone was dressed up in their hoochie mama clothes and I felt like such a nerd in my stripes. They were letting a lot of drinks on draft run out because they were preparing for Oktoberfest the following day. Josie was still able to have a sampler and I began with a Framboise (girly, I know). We were hungry girls and I was in burger mode, which usually only happens once a month, and yes it is before that time of the month. I had the Smokehouse Burger and Josie had the Mini BBQ Short Rib “Sloppy Joes”. The food was well-priced and pretty darn good for any gastropub. Like a good Jewish girl I gave Josie the bacon from my burger and she said it was homemade and perfection. I had no complaints and we both cleaned up our plates quite nicely.

We talked to the beer sommelier and the general manager while eating and learned a lot more about this place and the concept. Basically, they wanted to bring the food from their favorite restaurants: Smitty’s, Parkway Grill, and Houston’s to Alhambra. We get that, but was most impressive was how reasonably affordable they were compared to the named restaurants. I am not that big of a beer connoisseur but my other half is and she was impressed by their selections. It was the same thoughtful selections that you see at Lucky Baldwins but are so often overlooked at the big chains like Yard House.  When Josie was busy chatting with management and ordering dessert, I had a long chat with the bartender. I was asking him if he had this amazing bottle of beer I once had, it was a white Belgian from Canada. I tried it once with the former bartender from Lucky Baldwins at Old Towne Pub. He ordered it for me because he knew my beer taste. It was love at first sip. This bartender knew exactly what I meant and pulled it out of the fridge and kept it on ice for us. So what is the name of my most favorite beer? La Fin Du Monde, which translates to the end of the world, and it is brewed by Unibroue. It is so good and I split a bottle with Josie who almost died when she saw that it was $19 a bottle. I am worth it, or at least I keep telling myself that.

After this delicious bottle it was nearly 1:20 and Josie suggested we go to the Langham for last call. I had a glass of bubbly and Josie had a beer more to her dark liking, an Old Rasputin. While Josie and I are virtually the same person and can even at times share a brain we do have some very strong differences. I am a Blackberry and she is an iPhone. I am Diet Coke and she is Coca-Cola Classic. Perhaps the image of a flute of champagne and a pint of dark ale is our best summation. Regardless, after her thoughtfulness and generosity I worry that the lesbian rumors about us may have to be forced into fruition because it will be impossible to ever find a man so caring and aware of my neurotic and constant mention of likes and dislikes. She keeps track and knows that I always want artichoke hearts, egg salad, and bamboo shoots. She also knows to always put mochi and yogurt chips in my fruity fro-yo. I know that she always requires extra dressing, a huge bowl of rice, and lemon slices galore. I make sure that she has granola and graham cracker crumbs in her tart, chocolate, or peanut butter fro-yo. We are building some type of lasting relationship and we are both equally Uncouth Gourmands, which is our strongest bond and allows us to toast regardless of what our glasses are or what they are filled with.

After a full work week and endless birthday surprises from my partner, I headed home to see the other woman in my life, my mama. I flew in to San Jose on Saturday afternoon and I began celebrating a long weekend in Santa Cruz with my family. My mom picked me up at the airport and I told her that all of LA is abuzz about a restaurant in Los Gatos called Manresa. Los Gatos is a small affluent town in between Silcon Valley and the beach town of Santa Cruz where I grew up. It is where I spent a lot of my high school days when I wanted to get away from my hippy upbringing and wanted to get in touch with my preppy side. I actually think that the reason I live in Pasadena is because it is so similar to Los Gatos except in a big city. Pasadena is equipped with a Bentley dealership, J. Crew, and an Old Town area just like that of Los Gatos. It is close to interesting areas (read: a LOT more culture)  but somewhere where I, as a girl, am totally comfortable living alone and walking freely at any time of night.

Manresa is closed from Monday to Wednesday so we made a reservation and showed up on Sunday night at 5:30 just the two of us as my brother had a babysitter. I told the babysitter that we would be back at 9pm at the latest. I know how tasting menus work and yet we didn’t even finish dinner until 9:40. My mom said when making the reservation that it was my birthday and upon walking in we were seated right by the window and there was a discreet birthday card waiting for me signed by all of the staff at Manresa. It was a charming touch. My mom and I both wanted the full restaurant experience from Chef David Kinch, who beat out Bobby Flay on Iron Chef, and went with the tasting menu. It was not cheap at $160 a person with no wine included. I had a few glasses of a sparkling riesling and my mom got a chardonnay. We were told by our fabulous waitress, Debbie, that the menu would start at the sea, go to the garden, go back to the sea, then to land with a poultry and a meat dish, and finish with two desserts. She mentioned that it changes over the course of the night and that it is best to get there early. The first thing we were served were some amuse-bouches.

The very first thing looked just like dessert but was actually quite savory. It was a black olive madeline and a red bell pepper gelee. The next thing we were served came on the waiter’s platter and was a foie gras croquette they recommended taking it all in one bite as it was hot and could squirt. I really am not trying to be uncouth/vulgar, I swear. However, I had to eat so quickly I forgot to take a picture and I was kindly asked by the host to not use flash, I apologize for the sub-par photo quality. However, this foie gras one bite was hot and delish, it warmed me up and definitely tantalized my palate.

The next amuses were a foie gras soup with a fried squash blossom on top and a soft boiled egg with sherry vinegar and maple syrup. It was all delightful little one bites and I could tell my mom was loving it but wanting something substantial. It was around this time they brought out fresh bread and butter. My mom has never been to France and I always tell her that the number one reason to go is for the butter. She has yet to have french butter but was going crazy about the butter they presented to her. She told the waitress and she mentioned that they have a cow in Watsonville and that they make their own butter. My mom used to teach special ed in Watsonville and was once again impressed by all of the touches.

The real courses began with oysters that were a little to salty for both of our tastes but I could tell instantly that they were extremely fresh. I wish they were plain instead of covered in seaweed and buckwheat. However, I heard the table next to us with a surfer remark that it was so salty it reminded him of just picking an oyster up and eating it on his surfboard. I think that is a great compliment. I have always been more a fruit person and my mom has always been a little bunny (it’s no wonder I am a funny bunny) that loves vegetables so she loved the Into the Vegetable Garden salad. We learned that they have 2 acres on a farm in the Santa Cruz mountains area of Bonny Doon where they grow everything. This sealed the deal. I was in love. It was like he was making and serving my backyard. Chef David Kinch even oned up his Bobby Flay victory when it was revealed that he lives in Santa Cruz. I knew I had to meet this man and the waitress arranged a kitchen tour for us at the end of the meal. I was now on my second glass of bubbly and was ready for whatever courses would be thrown my way. The next one was by far my favorite, it was an abalone soup with sea urchin and foie gras in a light gingery broth. It was incredible. Sea urchin has become one of my favorite foods and I was amazed that we had now seen foie gras in 3 dishes.

The next few dishes were black cod and a farmed chicken breast both were good but not mind blowing like that soup. The last dish once again won me over. It was a Napa Valley spring lamb and tongue confit with carrots with orange purée and exotic spice. It tasted very Moroccan to me and as someone that normally doesn’t love either lamb or tongue, I was truly impressed. I couldn’t get enough of this particular dish.

We asked if we could get both dessert courses at the same time as we had a babysitter to get back to and they happily obliged. I am quite positive that this is the kind of restaurant that never says the word, “No” unless of course it has to do with camera flashes. The dessert course was the The Flavors of New Orleans equipped with beignets, bananas, and pralines and then a pumpkin soup which was poured over ice cream. One of my other favorite touches was that the last thing brought out looked just like the first, except it was a regular madeline cookie with a strawberry gelee. It was the perfect bookend to an absolutely exquisite meal.

We were taken back to one of the cleanest and best run kitchens I have ever seen. The only one that compares is the Baazar and they have a much larger operation going. There was something so charming about seeing the chef working, knowing the area where their garden is, knowing where their cow and thus butter comes from that made this meal so enjoyable.

Chef David Kinch made sure we enjoyed our meal, which of course we did and I can honestly say it was one of the top dining experiences of my life. It was also so special for my mom to get a taste (pun always intended) of the food world that I have become such a fan and groupie of. The next day my mom made me lasagna and she was back in her own kitchen. We may not have had our napkins folded back in to a cone every time we went to the bathroom but it was no less of a great experience. I think 2 weeks is a long enough birthday celebration. I am done. I can buy my own food and drinks now, but thank you to all that joined in my festivities. I am sure that this will be a truly great year in my life.

In honor of Carina’s birthday I opted to prepare a romantic dinner at home. I got up early on Monday morning, picked up some flowers for my home, and laid out about 20 cookbooks across my always clean home. I set out to create a five course meal for my birthday sweet and told her to invite a few people. She did no such thing and decided to be “discreet” and announce the invite on Twitter. It’s ok though, it’s not like we have 900 “followers” or anything. What followed was a confirmation from a very elite guest, a food writer from the LA Weekly, Derek Thomas. What, a colleague of Jon Gold was coming to my house to eat a meal I prepared? I was nervous beyond words. I told everyone one thing before eating, “expect the worst and you’ll never be disappointed.” These turn of events led to one of the funniest nights in recent UG history. It was a labor intensive 5 course meal, aside from Carina impregnating some tomatoes, I did it all by myself. Here’s the menu and  pictures course by course.

I’m not surprised Carina liked the dessert course best, I did try to replicate one of the first desserts we had together at King Louie XV in Monaco or as we’d like to say, our first summer together. I must say, I was pleased by Derek’s enthusiasm over the food. It was probably not the best meal he’s ever eaten, but I’m positive he had a fabulous time. Dating Sensei, Margaret, rocked our little worlds. Attendees included: Margaret, Brian Breth, Derek Thomas, Zena warrior princess, Carina, and I. It was a night of uncouth talk, too much bubbly, and an endless supply of laughter. Here are some discussion highlights.

After 5 courses we all had the urge to walk it off. Fortunately, where I live in my parent’s back house there are 15 acres and 300 horses to walk around. I never imagined the day when I would see Carina in a tractor.

What we set out to provide and what we ended up with were at opposing ends. It’s so interesting that a night that was supposed to be classy ended up, in this case, with us running around like horses. At the end of the night, I felt proud and tired at the same time.

The following day our UG investor, Chuck, cleaned out the back most conference room at his office for UG brainstorming. He’s so sweet. In order to sound grown-up, we like calling this brainstorm “work,” but it hardly is. We still have yet to make a dime, our bank balances are quickly dropping, and there’s no end in sight. But in all honesty, there’s no other place than here, right now, with anyone else we’d rather be.

The day ended with us interviewing our first employee, Young Jin. Young Jin is actually an intern, but he’s a breathing body and we’ll call him whatever we want. Here’s us interviewing him.

On Thursday night, we headed to the Brass Monkey for karaoke. Even though I’m not good at it, it’s kind of become my new favorite thing. Here’s the conversation between our friend Bijan and Carina while I was singing:

Bijan: Clap when it’s her part.

Carina: Why? Is she bad?

Bijan: Just be a good friend.

I think you get the picture. The highlight of the evening was going to be that I would, alas, get to again see Mr. Fig. I know, I said I’d throw out his number, but I was feeling rather lucky and I wanted to give it one more shot. I’m a pretty passionate individual and when I see something I want, I tend to go after it. So Carina advised me to be direct and tell him how I felt. Did I get anywhere? No. Rejection, I suppose, is also a part of growing up. Here’s my Facebook status update the following morning:

Carina to Josie: You declared your love and he declared his like.

Here’s Carina and I while hopes were still high:

To Carina: There’s no one I’d rather be burning the midnight oil with. You complete me as a person and as a colleague. Happy Birthday, my dear.

Chuck: Many thanks to you. Your untrammeled optimism and faith is always un-fleeting. You are our biggest cheerleader.

Claire Best: Our agent and our Hollywood confidant. Thank you for all your persistence.

To Mama and Papa Mora/Mama Ost: Most of all we thank you, Uncouth Gourmand breeders. Your confidence and “support” in us means the world. We swear, this business school education will pay off one day. Want to buy a piece of Uncouth Gourmands? Everyone else wants equity, but you guys. Please be patient, we may not be ready to cut the financial umbilical cord. We love you.

The UGs have gone from a mellow holiday weekend in Santa Cruz, aka Santa Snooze, to returning to Los Angeles and being as busy as ever. Wednesday was one of the busiest days and we were oh so Toluca Lake as we went straight from a meeting at ABC to Mo’s Burgers for a late lunch. We’re still not “Hollywood” but we are working on it. After our late lunch I rushed to class and then as soon as it let out I headed to Downtown to celebrate one of the many Birthdays this month. What’s with all of you September babies? Your parents had to keep warm and close in the winter months and now you are  overbooking the UGs calendar with birthday celebrations. This day belonged to the lovely Veronica who we had the pleasure of shopping with last week in search of her birthday dress. Thanks to the suggestion of Sino Soul she decided to hold her 09-09-09 birthday bash at O Bar, a very cool downtown space, that is underutilized. It was great seeing Veronica, aka Legs, in the white dress I picked for her the day that Josie tried on that infamous wedding dress. Sadly, it’s looking like that will remain the only day that Josie’s body will ever sport such a costume. After all, the Quija board said that she wouldn’t marry until 35 and in chef Ludo’s words, “Josie, please! No more dating. It’s really not your thing.” Truer words have never been echoed. Sorry Josie, only 10 more years to go…However, she (and I) are in no hurry to wed. After all, we have an empire to build. Are you with us, uncouthies?

However, there was one person who was very missed;  it was Veronica neighbor/uncouthie and the UG proclaimed “Mayor of Downtown”, Arun. All ended well because this caused us to talk to more people. In fact, one lady who we’ve met at several events and are Facebook friends but with whom we never talk to (or maybe we were just to drunk to remember), Margaret. Margaret was the lady of the hour and we suddenly learned that she was a dating icon. She told us about her Match.com rejection email templates and how she scares men with her stripper pole. Josie and I listened intently like disciples listening to “the prophet.” We named her our Dating Sensei and she will now be the first person we talk to at any party. Love that girl!

Our next action packed full day was on Friday where I got reacquainted with an old favorite sport, throwing down tiles-of the Scrabble variety-with a group of friends at the homey Cafe Zephyr. Later Josie and I headed to Beverly Hills to meet our agent. We jokingly asked for Emmy tickets but they know us too well there and offered us something even better, fruit tarts and cupcakes. Upon a recommendation from a Jdater via text we decided to check out Tom Coliccho’s Craftbar. We had been wanting to go for a while and figured we were on the Westside and it was around Happy Hour time. I have one funny story about Tom, about a year ago I was in a Borders browsing and I saw a book called, Get in the Game, I thought it was strange that Tom Coliccho would have a book with that title. Upon careful examination I noticed that the man on the cover of the book was Cal Ripken Jr. and not Tom. Always a foodie never a sports enthusiast-after all, I just referred to Scrabble as a sport.

If it seems like I am ignoring the food it is because I am. Don’t worry I am getting there. Josie was a little cranky all day but upon entering Craftbar she was not. I immediately noticed a signature fragrance when walking in that I appreciated. Josie, the flower girl, immediately noticed the crooked orchids and couldn’t stop questioning or staring. She kept repeating, “Why the hell are their flowers crooked?” The restaurant, the bar, and the cabana area were virtually all empty and we, Eastsiders, were complaining how cold the Westside was. Josie was starving and I was not. She ordered a $5 beer, a braised pork sandwich and we split a flatbread with salami. I had a $7 cocktail and the calamari salad. I wasn’t hungry and found the dish to be fine, nothing great. The tomatoes in my salad were amazing and if I never had them before I would’ve been blown away but this is the way Bazaar makes them. They are blanched, peeled, and impregnated with a strong balsamic. If I love only one thing, I love vinegar. But again as much as I love these fruits of the man-made variety, they didn’t have the knock my socks off effect.

Josie, on the other hand, was not a happy camper. She hated her sandwich, yes, I am saying hated. It didn’t satiate her (keep in mind we are having a comic book written about us called, The Insatiatbles) and she just found it to suck. She thought the flatbread was okay and found the waitstaff to be flat and almost robotic. We always say context plays a big role and this was just not working for her. She wasn’t impressed by the decor, service, or the food and let me use a sports analogy, “Three strikes and they are out!” The bill came to $45 dollars and we got out of there as quickly as possible. In the car, Josie was questioning me on my thoughts. The truth is I thought it was okay but I couldn’t really justify anything and I definitely didn’t love the place. Nothing was incredible. I liked that the Happy Hour menu lasted for many hours, that  it was reasonably priced in this economy, and that it gives every Top Chef enthusiast a chance to try Tom’s food. I could justify dropping a little money there but Josie could not. Fair enough. I suppose she’s blown her chance at being a judge on Top Chef!

We went our separate ways a little while after that. Josie ate at her house, I got frozen yogurt and later she picked me up to begin our Friday night out. We stopped off at a going away party for our friend Lauren at Barney’s in Pasadena and then made it out to Blue Goose to see Enthusiast20/Ricky on his birthday day.

We first met Rick at a Yelp Elite event and have since seen him at a few of Sino Soul’s events. He always makes us smile when he calls Josie Eva Mendez. As clearly, she looks like no such thing. This time though he cracked us up when we were dancing with him and he said, “They’re mine” when his friends tried to dance with us. We’ll take it, for sure. We had no idea that Rick was such a party animal, but apparently after Blue Goose he was driving straight to Vegas.

We somehow managed to make it Library Bar just in time for last call and met up with Barrett’s brother. We then did an after party at Barrett’s house. This has been the location of many of Shabbat dinners but this time they didn’t do dinner at their house but they certainly did a lot of l’chaims. We left because our host and his girlfriend were occupying the bathroom and after so many l’chaims, I had to pee. Everyone seemed to have luck that night except me. It’s okay, I have had a great deal of luck recently and I was glad my other UG 1/2 had her turn. The next day I tried for the second week in a row to go to services at Chabad of Downtown Los Angeles. This time I wasn’t quite as lucky in punctuality. I missed services but arrived just in time for lunch and l’chaims (it is such a classier way to say drinks/shots). I said hello to all of the new friends I have made, was poured many l’chaims and grabbed the bowl of pickles and put them right in front of me. Uncouth. Jews are famous for their long goodbyes and time always flies. I had a Jdate at 7 that night at Liquid Kitty, which just sounded vulgar. It wasn’t open yet so the date moved to Don Antonio’s for margaritas. Keep in mind I had been drinking since around noon and the only thing in my tummy was a lot of kosher pickles and some TBG (tomato basil garlic) pizza. I have been a much more put together date in the past. I don’t think I was my charming self. Oh well. I called my new British friend that I met at Barbarella to see if he wanted to hang out since I knew he lived in Santa Monica but he was heading Downtown to the Edison. Well actually he thought he was going to Silverlake; it was like the first time I met him and he thought he was in Hollywood and I had to break it to him that he was in Silverlake. I was getting tired of the Westside even though I really wanted to go to Diana Takes a Bite’s birthday party and decided it would be best to go home and have Josie pick me up so we could go back to our favorite place-Downtown. The line at the Edison was insane but I did say hello or ello to the Brit. I was actually feeling exhausted and slightly queasy and Josie was hungry so we went to one of our favorite establishments downtown for food and/or premium cocktails, Church & State.

Church & State was packed and we took our seats at the bar. I needed food and for once I let Josie completely order. We got the mac and cheese and the salad. We both have interesting memories here. For me, it was when I was rude and stupid to a famed food blogger. For Josie, it was when she went on a date with the former bartender. Regardless it felt good to be back. We got to see our favorite and the best dressed sommelier in Los Angeles. We also were reacquainted with the charming bar back and we got to meet the new tall and handsome bartender from Amsterdam. We also had a famous guest sitting at the bar next to us, it was Elvis’ widow, Priscilla Presley. When you have incredible food at affordable prices, great service, and a nice atmosphere there is no point in going to somewhere like Craftbar. They now even carry Bitburger on draught, but on this night I was chugging water.

Josie and the staff all wanted to go to Tony’s Bar. I agreed but wasn’t really feeling it, it was my day to be a little cranky. Regardless of my not so good-drank too much early in the day- mood, I was still quite impressed by a great restaurant and a good bar. Tony’s bar is not really my style although Josie, the C&S staff, and Los Angeles Magazine disagree and all love it there. However, Saturday night was the most packed I had seen it, there was an awesome DJ, and even my exhaustion and crankiness couldn’t put a damper on the night. Give the UGs a restaurant where the waitstaff will party with them after hours and I will show you two bustling and buzzing little bees.

Do the unemployed get to celebrate Labor Day? The UGs hope so! I, Josie, have a hard time relaxing, which is probably why I am a chronic sufferer of so many ailments. However, this post is not for your reading pity (for those kinds of stories, please refer to the many posts below) but rather to fill you in on the progress of my recovery. Even though you may not see it throughout the blog, the UGs are rather resilient workers.  In fact, our most brilliant ideas come to us in bouts of insomnia. Speaking from the tongue of an entrepreneur, the UG journey is a mapless one. A journey in which the boundaries of our success lie only in our overflowing imagination. Given those grandiose macro-ideas, you can understand how we also find it exceedingly depressing when we don’t find time to relax. So when Carina invited me for a short and relaxing trip to her hometown, Santa Cruz, I quickly obliged. I was nervous because for the first time I was going to finally meet the parents. I was excited to meet the people and the city that shaped my partner’s past, especially given that our friendship has played a determining factor in our fate.

7AM was the call time and Carina drove the first half of the five hour trip. I slept for a while as I was exhausted from the 4AM end time of My Last Bite’s party the night before. As we drove into Santa Cruz, I was reminded of Ojai. My ex-boyfriend of eight years, who I’m super bummed won’t speak to me anymore, is from Ojai. We knew the family had a lot in store for the UGs. We had a Labor Day BBQ at Carina’s Godmother, Lisa’s, house and several mini trips of things to see. How on earth were we to do so much in so little time?

We walked into Carina’s house and were immediately bombarded by Carina’s little brother, Cody. He jumped out of a blind corner and scared the s$@! out of me. Later that night Cody, who loves wrestling, told me he could fiercely lift me. I didn’t let him, of course. I’m frail. From there we went to Lisa’s house and started BBQ’ing. I made the hamburger patties and for dessert we had chocolate fondue. Linda, who’s a shy friend of the of the family, started helping with the chocolate fondue. Linda who is  a self-proclaimed fire marshal was nervous about the fondue flame and ended up snuffing the fire. Carina, who is impatient about her dessert-especially when fruit is involved, looks at her and says, “Linda, you ruin everything.” Linda runs out of the room, grabs all her belongings, and storms out of the house in hurry blaming her leave on her daughter’s sickness. Uncouth! There was no harm and we went back to Carina’s house and got in the hot tub and sauna. It is totally the NorCal way and something I can get use to ending every night with; the UGs had no trouble relaxing.

The next day we had a Thai lunch with Carina’s 90-year old grandfather, Arthur. As soon as he saw the “new member of the family” (me), he asked me my name. I said, “Josie,” and he said, “That’s my mother’s name.” I laughed and told him I give all the cute guys I meet the same line. It’s a good one, too. When lunch was over we all walked Arthur, who’s in a walker, to the car. Carina’s mom, Janis, was busily talking and pushing Arthur at the same time. Janis shouldn’t have been allowed to do both because as we were all talking, Arthur started yelling and making a scene in the parking lot. We all looked down at him and asked him what was wrong. He just pointed down at his feet. Apparently in all the talking and pushing, Janis had run over his feet and his whole body weight was now resting on his left foot. Poor Arthur! He gave me many laughs and it made me remember how much I miss my own grandfather who passed about 7 years ago.

As we were leaving Carina gave me a tour of the infamous beach babe dudes and where they all change out of their wet suits. Man, there are so many cute guys in Santa Cruz. I’m thinking of renaming the place altogether to “the island of men so beautiful they make you weep.” In other words, after the tour I needed some cold water to pour on myself. Enough said.

My first visit to Santa Cruz was utterly relaxing. We didn’t get to all the things we had planned on, but it was ok. Between the afternoon naps, hot tub, sauna, and the verbal abuse of shy people, I’ve never slept better. Thanks, in-laws! It was wonderful to have finally met you.

I wished we could have stayed a bit longer, but the UGs had a prior engagement – a free meal! The UGs have been so broke nowadays that when offered the UGs are never ones to turn down free food. Hell, it’s the only reason we go on dates at all. Ha! Christina of the boutique PR company, InkFoundry, invited us to the Flemings downtown to sample their newest prime burger bar and Happy Hour menu, or as Fleming’s calls it “The 5 for 6 til 7.” The UGs have coined that Happy Hour is the new dinner so we were eager to try it out and report back to the rest of the UG nation, even if we had to drive five hours to sample it. Look what we’re doing for you world?

We got there early so we popped into Starbucks and “freshened up.” Still early, we decided to go in and drink. Our first visit to Fleming’s was a few months ago at their Woodland Hills location when Carina won us a steak and wine dinner for two on Twitter. Despite not being corporate restaurant girls, we had the best time in the world. The first time we were in a private room at a communal table with 20 strangers. Food was good, but service was impeccable. Our second visit to Fleming’s downtown was no different. We felt a bit out of place because everyone looked like they’d just come out of the opera and given that Carina had just finished changing in the car and I was wearing torn jeans and her dirty shirt, we sat at the bar. Our bartender, David, gave us the royal treatment. David had the manager come out, the chef, and even had the pastry chef make an impromptu dessert of berries and chantilly cream for Miss. Carina. Further proof that experience makes the meal that much better.

I’m a huge fan of beef carpaccio and since it was on the new HH menu, I figured I had to try it. I’m glad we did, as it was spectacular. Christina suggested we try the portobello fries, which sounded interesting but were merely alright. The UG way is to try at least everything once, so that’s what we did. For the sake of research, the UGs tried every single burger on the menu! Forget 2 Girls 1 Cup we were 3 Girls 5 burgers. Here’s the breakdown:

Ahi Burger: I am allergic so had to refrain but Carina and Christina went on and on about how this was their favorite of the night. Fresh fish and well seasoned ginger soy sauce made this a very interesting burger. It was definitely both of their highlights.

Fleming’s Prime Bacon Cheeseburger: One could understand why this is the least expensive of the five, as nothing about it stands out. Not bad, but not interesting. The lack of complexity of this one should be reserved for a the unadventurous man or woman that we all know, however as a foodie, this one is far from inventive.

Filet Mignon Burger: Hands down my favorite of the five. We ordered this one med-rare and given that Fleming’s IS a steakhouse, for me, this one is the way to go. Thumbs up!

Portobella Burger: Although never a fan of vegetarian options, sometimes the UGs crave light veggies. Today was one of those days for me, Josie. I liked the caliber of the goat cheese and a meaty lightness of a grilled portabella. I’d order it again.

Crab Cake Burger: Carina said this burger was  too salty. I am sure I, a salt whore, would have loved it but again it could have killed me. The Bartender, David, did say that the crab cakes were one of the most popular appetizers and that one cake is amazing but two may be too much.

Onion Rings: Come with every burger and since onion rings have been my new obsession, I’d have to say I really enjoyed these perfectly battered and fried ringlets.

The UG girls had a great time. We laughed all night. The festivities ended with a box of beautiful truffles. We loved sharing dating, food, and PR stories with Christina and seeing pictures of the bartender’s daughter. We felt right at home, which was a lovely addition to my week with the family. Yup, they may not know it yet but I am an honorary member of the family: The Ost family, Carina’s godmother’s family, the Fleming’s Steakhouse family, the Ink Foundry family, and anywhere else that will feed me well, allow me to relax, and treat me oh so kindly!

If this last week had any theme to it, I could only categorize it as very odd. One of the highlights was when Frenchy came back from his tour of NorCal and Vegas for one more night in LA before catching his plane. This was a Monday so Josie was at work and school that night. I had this whole week off from school and decided to take Frenchy out. I picked him up from Union Station as he was returning from his previous San Diego destination. It was midday and despite the traffic I was certain would arise later I decide to have us make a stop at my good friend Tony’s house in Boyle Heights for a quick beer. He and his band The Mo-Odds (speaking of odd) just got back from a multi-city national tour that lasted more than two weeks. Tony who is a Pole with no Jewish background was wearing a shirt that read, “Everyone loves a Jewish Boy”.

When Frenchy was in LA earlier there was only one thing he wanted to do and that was to head to Venice Beach. However, the traffic getting him there and the nearly 2hr bus ride kept him away, but this time I was determined to take him. We walked the beach and I ended up getting a text message from the Brit from Barbarella. He lives in Santa Monica and so I asked if he wanted to meet up that night. He suggested Cabo Cantina on 3rd Street Promenade. Frenchy wanted a party so I took him there. There was one problem I was now at a table with a Brit and Frenchy and almost everything was lost in translation. I tweeted that I was surrounded by foreigners and that I wanted someone else to show up. Paul who was our volunteer coordinator contact for when we worked Taste of the Nation LA arrived. I was now alone with three men. Not a bad place to be. Frenchy said he wanted to eat the best burger before he left. I am not all that knowledgeable on the west-side food scene but I knew that the Comme Ca burger couldn’t be as “perfect” as the New York Times said. Furthermore, I felt ashamed to say that I had never tried a Father’s Office burger. I heard they were good and iconic but I had never tastes one. Paul, a Santa Monica resident, vouched that it was pretty good and worth trying. The boys, excuse me, men, piled in my car and off we went. I was shocked by what a small space it was; it is also a gastropub as opposed to a burger joint. I always represent Pasadena and order a Craftsmen. Frenchy and I each had a burger.  The Brit who is a personal trainer stuck to a coke and Paul who said he already had a burger for lunch ordered some olives and mushrooms for the table.

My take on the burger: the meat was very good. Frenchy asked for rare and got rare.  I was not that impressed with the bun but I am a bread snob. I loved the sweet onion relish and arugula. While I am not kosher by any means I am not that crazy about cheeseburgers; I normally stick to hamburgers. I tend to like meat and cheese separately, with that said the mixture of blue cheese and Gruyere was quite nice. It was a good burger but not the best. Almost all sandwiches and burgers for me have a lot to do with bread first, meat second, and condiments third.

Over the course of this meal I learned that Paul competed in this year’s Grilled Cheese Invitational and, out of the hundreds of sandwiches there, I tried his asparagus and pear pairing…how bizarre. He gained many foodie points from me. I felt bad for Frenchy that I couldn’t find him any cute American girls for his last night before he heads back to Paris. Paul decided to walk home and I took my Brit and Frenchy to one of the few Venice bars I know, The Otherroom. Once again, we were surrounded by men. Why don’t Josie and I ever have this good of luck? Finally two cute young girls came up to the bar we were sitting at and I told them that this is my friend’s last night in America. One of the girl’s said, “Oh how cool, I used to know how to say, ‘I can’t speak French’ in French but I forgot”. It was too funny. I took the Brit home and Frenchy to his hotel by the airport and he will definitely be missed. As much as I love Josie it was fun to have a day/night of boy time.

The next day wasn’t quite as nice. My tooth, wisdom tooth, was killing me. When I complained about it months ago and questioned my dentist about whether it should be removed, he responded, “I don’t see why, you have a big enough mouth.” A loud Jewish girl with a blog that has a big mouth-shocking! Something in my mouth had changed and this pain was unbearable. My wisdom tooth was coming in slightly crooked and upsetting the rest of my mouth and hitting the bone. I made an emergency appointment with my dentist and he recommended that I get it removed on Thursday and prescribed me some pain killers. Josie was having a toothache of a day as well as she got in a slight accident while leaving her work causing her whiplash and strong back pain. She called me sad and heading to get her favorite chicken in Little Tokyo. I was also sad and in pain and suggested that we should be together. We have made it a habit to ask all food bloggers what their favorite restaurant is and since Josh of Food GPS said his favorite was Elena’s Greek Armenian we had been dying to go. He gave us some pearls of wisdom: At Elena’s, it’s soup, never salad. Order falafel with hummus, veggie grape leaves, lamb and lule kebab. We followed his first three pieces of advice but deviated on the main courses.

The soup was good but didn’t blow us away as we hoped it would. We still had to order our standard side of lemon slices to add to it. The pickled cabbage that comes to every table was something we had to ask for more of. The falafel and hummus plate was also good but not great. The main thing that blew our mind was the vegetarian grape leaves. It was stuffed with rice that carried a delicious risotto consistency and was our favorite part of the meal. When it came to the main course I had the quail and Josie had the chicken kebab. Neither was bad but perhaps if we didn’t stray from Josh’s choices we would be more in love. Also we are used to dining with a happier outlook and we, Uncouth Gourmands, know that mood plays a big part in the dining experience. The pain in Josie’s neck and back and mine in my tooth whenever taking a bite wasn’t adding any points.

For the UGs are Mediterranean/Middle East food heart still belongs to Cafe Bravo in Glendale but Elena’s had a good fight and we will give her another chance when the UGs are in better mental and physical spirits. Also, foodies/bloggers/readers we want to know all of your favorite restaurants in case we forget/forgot to ask. Please post them in comments and let us know if you will accompany us.

The next day we had something on our calendars that we were looking forward to for a long time, the Top Chef Premiere party at My Last Bite’s house.Tony, who I mentioned was back in town, and I have an ongoing plan to do tennis, wine, and movies on Wednesdays. However, due to both our schedules it rarely works out or happens as we plan. I was on pain killers and wasn’t feeling up to playing but I knew we had to bring a dish and beverage to this party.  Tony, who is an expert gardener and bread maker, I knew would be able to help me out on the cooking front as I was as loopy as can be. We headed off to the UGs new favorite grocery store, which he was the first person to introduce me to, Super King Market in Altadena.

At one point he suggested we either poison all of the bloggers in attendance or we stick out with a show stopper dish. I opted for the latter and it became similar to the 12 Days of Christmas song as I talked him out of first 30 quail and then 1 duck to finally agreeing on 2 chickens. We decided to stuff the birds with brown rice, raspberries, grapes, walnuts, and onions. We also proceeded to find aphrodisiac tea which we placed in the rice water to infuse the rice with love potion. If anyone got lucky that night you have us to thank. The dish became very similar to a medieval dish and Tony decided to name it, “Charles Martel Chicken” in case anyone asked. Tony taught me that cooking grapes was one of the yummiest ways to eat them. I was somehow under the impression that freezing them and/or having the peeled for you by Samoan men wrapped in a diaper like thing while fanning you down with palm leaves was the way to go. Since Tony did so much of the leg work we decided to invite Tony and his lovely girlfriend, Zena, to the party. We figured we were bringing two chickens to a party, we should be able to let two friends tag along.

When we got to the party one of the first things we heard someone say was, “Who brings chicken to a party?” The Uncouth Gourmand Girls responded the only way we knew how, by saying, “We actually brought two chickens.” The hilarity ensued. We saw many of our foodie friends: The Delicious Life, Food GPS, and Freshman in the Kitchen. We were most excited about meeting the famous My Last Bite, Jo, who is a Twitter celebrity and a chef groupie, I apologize I have no better word. Those are two titles we covet and she does it the best and effortlessly as there are pictures of her with Mario Batali, Wolfgang Puck, and Eric Ripert under her “Chef Photo” section. She is just so cool and a rockstar in her own right, after all, she performed one night only at The Whiskey. She and her husband have a sound proof music room, a tent in the backyard equipped with couches and a full bar, and multiple TVs in every room. They are just so cool and I was pleasantly surprised to learn that they are just as charming and sweet as you can imagine. My friend Tony was a little drunk and suggested karaoke, Jo, the awesome host found him the Wii game with a microphone and proceeded to sing Tom Jones with him as she hooked it all up. Also when Tony was leaving he attempted to grab a bottle of wine, I gave him the eye of shame and he put it back and grabbed a couple of bottles of beer from the fridge as has he grabbed our remaining chicken. I figured that was okay as he went on and on about how there was a beer at the party that had a very old recipe, like from the Egyptians, and that he read about it in National Geographic Magazine. When Jo and her hubby, Peter, saw this man carrying chicken and unopened bottles of beer they applauded him. Jo even offered him more and stuck bottles in his pockets and in his handmade leather purse. His girlfriend, Zena, was mortified at his uncouthness. Josie and I loved that the hosts approved of such uncouth behavior. We met a ton of people there that we only follow on Twitter but don’t personally know like EstarLA, Daily Wine, and Kevin Eats. One of our favorites of the night was Limer35 who knows what UG girls like and got us beer and some of HeySmell’s chocolate chip cookies whenever we asked. Those cookies were so OMG with french butter and fleur de sel. However, they retail for $4 at Artisan Cheese Gallery so we definitely ate at least $16 dollars worth of cookies for free and were delivered to us at this party, it was heaven. Also, I apologize to Mozza2Go, the maker of the truffle mac and cheese, and Eli of Freshman in the Kitchen, and Josie’s dress maker because over the course of the night I heard Josie take credit for making the pizza, the mac n’ cheese, the flour-less chocolate cake one bites, and her own dress (respectively). It was a great night and I am glad I Tivo’d Top Chef because I missed a lot of the show by talking and laughing with you fine folks.

Josie spent the night at my house that night and took me to my dentist appointment the following morning. I took a heavy duty pill called Triazolam an hour before we left and my dentist was correct it produced an amnesia like effect. I have zero tolerance for pain and asked to be sedated. I know drugs make me very emotional and warned Josie of this ahead of time because I remember once being hysterical with my mom that there was no steamed cauliflower after a dental procedure. Perhaps Josie should be typing on this episode but I am afraid of what she may say I said/did. I have no memory of coming home but I know Josie was here most of the time and then left to pick up my prescription and  to go to a doctor’s appointment of her own. When woke up I was alone and in pain. I called my mom who is on vacation in Hawaii and was crying because I couldn’t find a hair tie. By the time Josie came back I was making us papaya sorbet, not that complicated I have a VitaMix it takes 3 minutes, and she gave me the hair tie off her wrist. She then proceeded to do everything I wanted to do and was the best Uncouthy Bestie I could ask for. We watched discs of Will & Grace and, although it hurt, she made me laugh by logging on to Match.com and showing me her profile picture which was the two of us but the thumbnail that Match chose was just on my face. I laughed asking her if that is why she was getting so many virtual winks. She whimpered because it was sadly true. Josie is iPhone and regular Coca-Cola and I am Blackberry and a Diet Coke head but we compliment each other so nicely. The PR girl, Kat, from Formula Pubic Relations that we met at Blogger Prom sent us the new Coca-Cola bottles to try out and we loved them. Josie was into the modern yet retro design and liked that the inside was also aluminum. I, on the other hand,  was high on drugs and emotional and said something of the effect of, “How did she know that I was Diet Coke and you were regular Coke? I can’t believe she sent us both she must really know us and loves us.”

Friday, was perhaps the oddest of all these days. I finally understood why Josie was calling me Chipmunk, as I consciously looked into a mirror. We were still not at top form but as we mentioned a few weeks ago we wrote a treatment for a reality show basically our blog come to life. We have been getting a little Hollywood and have had meetings with people we couldn’t have imagined. A couple of weeks ago at a meeting with a TV executive we ended up spotting Harvey Levin at the table next to us at BOA. We have people interested in being our managers and we are learning a lot about showbiz. We also have learned the importance of connections as a friend of a friend passed our treatment on to a real Beverly Hills agent and we had a meeting on Friday afternoon. We were eating yogurt and bananas in my car on my way there. The valet laughed at the sight of banana peels in the cup holders. The woman we were meeting with was fantastic. Halfway through the meeting I looked at her and said, “Josie and I kind of share a brain and I just want you to know that I can say with all certainty and without talking to Josie alone that we both adore you.” She loved our stories of Frenchy and the Brit and it was a perfect match. Once again, why isn’t this happening in our love lives? Anyway, long story short we now have an agent. Who would have thunk it? We are represented by the lovely and best Claire Best of Marsh Best & Associates! We left the meeting stunned and thrilled and we learned from the valet guy that Brad Pitt’s office occupies he same building. When Josie called her aunt to tell her the good news, it was the latter half of the information that she was excited about. Again, it was a lovely but strange week of surprises. Claire, who is neighbors with Zack Braff, invited us to a party at her house that night in the Hollywood Hills with an interesting mix of fabulous women. The table was filled with lawyers, directors, models, and more from Australia, The UK, and Minnesota. Josie and I brought lettuce wraps with a ton of fresh veggies and fruit in a papaya seed dressing. It was a magical night and I really had to pull Josie aside and say, “Did you ever imagine that today we would be at a party in the Hollywood Hills with our new agent?” The answer was, of course, no. This will always be known as the week I lost my wisdom…tooth and we gained an agent!

Je demande le père et la benjamine…

Il restait de la brioche qui commençait à rassir, je crois qu’il n’est nul besoin de donner une autre explication

Friday began at a place where the UGs have no place being, the Jonathan Club Beach in Santa Monica. We were headed there to meet with our mentor, Chuck, and his actor friend, Dana. We’re always so conflicted when deciding what to wear when we go the Jonathan Club. After all, there is a strict dress code that Chuck emails to us in advance. The place reeks of money and since we have yet to generate any of it, we haven’t necessarily received our “Members Only” jacket. However, we dressed up second best to the jacket and actually looked like the nice businesswomen that we are. We were proud and thought we had done well with our attire.

In only UG fashion, we started off totally inept. Firstly, I screamed in mortification as Carina drove down the center divider on PCH to ensure we made it there on time. After almost dying, we proceeded to park our own car in the “Members Only” lot. We got only blank stares from the valet guys who informed us that there was no need to park your own car; after all, we were at the Jonathan Club! And if those series of “bumps” weren’t bad enough, when we got there (very classily dressed in the business attire we had spent hours picking) we were surprised to see a bunch of people having a grand ‘ol time in guess what? Bathing suits! When are we going to catch a break in this town?

***Side Note: Chuck’s favorite line about The Jonathan Club Beach is, “This is a very conservative club in a very liberal city.” Apparently, the city and the club are not the “nicest of friends.” This was later affirmed when Chuck gave us a tour of the newly added aquatics area, which the city of Santa Monica objected to and only obliged to because the JC agreed to line the pool room with sprinklers. Get it? A pool room with sprinklers! They must really hate each other, however, their unrest made our tour.

When we arrived we immediately ran into Chuck. He escorted us to the “nicest table in the club” and we sat down. Chuck asked us if we’d ever been there before (I think anyone who knows us knows the answer to that one). I responded to Chuck by saying,”Yeah, I’ve been here. However, I’m usually on the other side of the beach. You know…with the commoners.” He laughed and his friend Dana arrived. Dana Kelly is a theater, commercial, and voice-over actor that Chuck wanted us to talk to in regards to our new UG project. We were immediately impressed by Dana. He’s an actor so he, like us, was just as nervous about the facilities as we, uncouthies, were. In fact, legend has it Dana got kicked out of the club a few years back for sporting a rebellious pair of Chuck Taylors – but he insists that was in a previous life. By the way, in another previous life, Dana also kicked his girlfriend of 17 years out of HER own house – she then realized it was HER house and kicked HIM out. They are still together. Don’t fret ladies, after hearing Dana had a girlfriend of 17 years, we gave him the obligatory Beyonce “If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it” dance. He laughed and was in no way offended.

Dana was a funny cat himself. Dana, like us, has encountered many funny failures in his career. Like when he told the director of a Powerade commercial that he knew how to ride a horse and buggy when he clearly had never done so before. So you can believe he wasn’t surprised when the actor horse took off at full speed. Chuck reminded him that the pain was worth it because he was probably drying off his tears on the fat residual checks. Sadly, Dana had no such luck. The Amish Powerade commercial was pulled by Pepsi when Gatorade (Cola-Cola) sued. Dana and the UGs, when will you ever catch a break? Dana had the same good attitude that the UGs have about that kind of thing and we all laughed.

The lunch started off with little zucchini muffins that the club is famous for. We scarfed down about a million of the little heavenly zucchini muffins and the meal moved on to a special course that Chuck called in advance for the chef to prepare for our visit. Chuck is always so sweet and generous to us. He had Chef Benjamin come out to meet us and then specially prepare the oh so unctuous piece of foie gras you see below. It was prepared with seared pineapple and serrano ham. If God made butter….

For lunch I had my staple favorite – the caesar salad, which had lots of avocado and parmesan. Carina had the Jonathan Beach Club staple, the sand dabs. Dana had the crab cakes and Chuck the roast chicken, which he pawned off on us in doggie bag on the way out – or so we thought it was chicken leftovers. We enjoyed our lunch and Dana promised to help us out in any way he could. We heart Chuck and Dana and we had a wonderful time. After eating at the club, Carina and I had the grotesque feeling of still being hungry. I asked her if she really thought Chuck gave us leftovers. We reached out behind us and pulled open the doggie bag. To our surprise it was filled with the cute little zucchini muffins that we were ogling over a few hours prior. The surprise made us scream in hysterics down the 110 FWY, as we were elated bunnies.

I feel slightly disgusted (and embarrassed) for saying this but from there we went for round three! We headed to Carina’s favorite new spot, Cham Korean BBQ in Pasadena. Here’s Carina’s review on Yelp.

We had gone by the new “Korean Bistro” last Sunday but sadly, it was closed. I was both intrigued and impressed by the rich wood decor and I was determined to come back. We got there and we were immediately showered with Ricardo’s love. And by love, I mean welcoming exuberance. He was sweet, funny and oh so charming. He introduced us to the proprietor, the staff, and head chef. The head chef used to work at AOC on Third and came to Cham earlier last month. Her work at Cham has primarily been to fuse Korean BBQ with the ethereal complexities of French bistro cuisine. I was in love. From the light salads to the tasty beef that sparkled with residual robust bits from the cast-iron skillet, everything was fabulous.

We sampled a medley of small plates that could fit any budget. I especially liked the Korean rice cakes, which had a semblance to Italian gnocchi, but were in my opinion, much more delicate and intricately crafted. Below are some pictures.

Watermelon salad, potato of the day, rice cakes, bibimbap with bulgogi.

My favorite part of the experience was when Ricardo, who is half Panamanian and half Chinese, told us that his longest love affair has been with food. I can guarantee that the UGs will definitely be stealing that line. Perhaps the best vantage point in the restaurant is the view you get across the street where you can see the poor chumps on the treadmills at the Pasadena LA Fitness.

After the food comma we induced ourselves into, we decided to part ways and take a brief nap before heading to Art Center College of Design for the viewing of senior projects. A friend of mine, Owen Gee, of Nicely Observed invited me a few days ago and we thought it might be a good way to get in on what’s new in the art world. Plus, I’ve been looking in to the Masters in Media Design at Art Center. Anyone been through it? We got there late (of course) but managed to get through the product design, graphic design, and photography exhibits. Fun, fun, fun! I’ve never seen such a cross section of cute guys! Carina and I were in heaven. We tend to be attracted to a lot of the starving artists, who also don’t have a cellphone or a checking account. When will the UGs catch a break? Ha! No, we are committed to staying single. After all, we have an empire to build.

From Art Center, we moved on in to Koreatown for some Karaoke with Erin on her last night in LA. We got to Brass Monkey where, sadly, the party was dwindling for the downtown crew but picking up for the UGs. We didn’t karaoke, well because, we shouldn’t sing in public but we met up with Carina’s classmate, Jig.

Owen Gee knew of a sweet after party, so we trekked off to Echo Park. Side note: with every passing drink Carina began enthralled by saying “ONG” and telling everyone that he had the coolest name ever. We got to the party after several wrong turns and Owen Gee fearing for his life driving with a UG. The party was still in the works so we mellowed out and decided to grab a pre-party drink(s) with Jig at El Chavo.  We had only 20 minutes before last call and made it just in the nick of time.

We had the famous margaritas at El Chavo and Carina was mad that the Dolly Parton bar was closed. The awesome bartender, Chris, said that was the old people side that closes at 11pm, no wonder Carina loves it. We both polished off two margaritas and some tacos (which apparently was our bartender’s dinner – oops! ).  Carina shocked all the patrons and got our bar mates to leave after saying, “Who do you have to f@ck around here to get some more chips?” The people on a date next to her spit out their drinks and proceeded to leave as soon as the awkward turtle receded. At this point in the night, Ms. Carina was a bit drunk so she was incoherently rambling a bit. At one point, she turns to me and says, “I just want to be in love.” I responded by saying,”What? Do you think you’re a bunny in a meadow! Stop talking like that. You’re going to ruin our empire if you go falling in love like that.” She laughed and agreed. I have to keep that girl in line sometimes. I think I am going to make her sign a no love contract until we make our first few million.

Josie’s Tale:

Firstly, I’d like to thank everyone who wanted to come and witness my debut, but were sadly turned away due to a full house (I tend to have that effect when I sous:)) Secondly, thank you to those of you who not only made it out, but also opened up your pocketbook just to cheer me on. Thank you!

Friday started with an impromptu lunch at Carina’s old stomping ground bistro, Blair’s, in Silverlake. Carina wanted to talk business but I was tired and groggy. I had three hours sleep the night before and was wondering how the hell I was going to endure a long night of dinner service. I could’ve easily ducked below the table top and slept; the only reason I didn’t was because I wanted to show off the new t-shirt I scored in the Blogger Prom goodie bag (it says, “Born to” on the front and “Blog” on the back). Damn, those guys are smart. I had the gruyere panini and Carina had the barbecue chicken sandwich with a side of mac and cheese. I was unimpressed by my dainty sandwich, but Carina really enjoyed her manwich. All together we spent $60 for a pretty meager lunch. I was most disappointed by the $12 glass of below average white wine that came to me upon recommendation from the waiter. I swear, some people have shit for brains. I left indifferent with the food, beverage, and service. As we left, the couple coming into the restaurant looked strangely at us, or maybe it was my shirt…But I looked over at Carina and jokingly said, “When people look at you weird, do you think it’s because they recognize us?” She laughed uncontrollably and we got into my car. Like my perpetual self, I left late. I was supposed to be at Ludo’s at 4, but it was 2:30 and I was about to sit in some very mortifying traffic.

But now, my Ludo tale….

Bolstered with two Red Bulls in hand, I swept as quickly as I could through traffic and still managed to get there 30 or so minutes late (I am seriously incapable of being on time). When I did get there, everyone had already been working for three hours. So you I’m sure you could imagine how much of a putz I felt like for being so late. Nonetheless, they got me straight to work, but not before a little bit of teasing. I, like always, showed up in hair & make-up and wearing my “Born to Blog” tee. I’m a UG so I always like to look effortlessly striking anywhere I go…..

The French are known to be the biggest antagonists in history, however, I was delighted to see how wonderful an example Chef Ludo’s kitchen was of the contrary. There was no bickering, yelling or demoralizing. In fact, we laughed, ate, and drank! But make no mistake, his male and female teammates were playful, meticulous, and congruent.

Below is a pic of Ludo blaring Tupac Shakur and turning the lights on and off. He’s so silly!

Shrouded behind a tough guy persona, Chef Ludo is an interesting cook. He is sweet, funny, humble, but most of all, extremely talented. As a measure of his own craziness, the menu carefully changes everyday. In fact, he tweets the most random of thoughts throughout the day. This was one of @chefludo ’s latest tweets “I am not happy with my snails tonight. I will not sleep tonight because of the damn snails. Merde” but mid-service he retweeted “Snails are perfect tonight. I am so happy. I love my snails.” Too funny, right?

First thing I had to do was to mince a copious amount garlic. About 30 cloves into mincing, I turned to Ludo and said, “Why don’t you just buy peeled garlic? You’re giving me carpal tunnel!” He mouthed something in French and smiled at me. To which I replied, “Why do I feel like I am at the nail salon? I swear those Vietnamese girls talk and laugh about me and I think you’re doing the same thing.” He chuckled and told me to keep mincing. After that arduous task, I got to move on to guess what? Another arduous task. I sat behind a box (that seemed larger than I) and cleaned chanterelle mushrooms with a paring knife for what seemed like days. Upon finishing that, dinner service began…

I moved up front with my amigo who was in charge of first courses. I stayed there for the remainder of the night assembling tiny little treasures like salads, scallops, and ahi dishes. I did pretty well with the assembling, but my only mortification came from one thing: salt seasoning. As you may already know, I’m kind of a “salt whore”, so the task of under-seasoning took all the power and restraint in the world to hold back. Luckily, I managed to contain myself for the evening. Despite the fact that there were only three French nationals in the kitchen, I was amazed that almost everyone in Ludo’s kitchen spoke in French. In the restaurant world everyone speaks Spanish, even the Gringos! The Gringos speak “kitchen Spanish”, but nonetheless they all communicate in a similar language. In Ludo’s kitchen everyone speaks at a bare minimum “kitchen French.” I, despite having lived with a French man (roommate not lover-unfortunately) for two and half years never picked it up as well as I should have. I was really amused that everyone in the kitchen referred to Ludo as “Chef”; I renamed that night- I renamed him, “Saadam.” He didn’t like that so much, but it’s evidence of the fun we had all night. Even when he did speak English, I couldn’t understand him. He’d say something to me in English and I’d antagonize him by saying, “Can you please speak English?” he’d respond, “I am speaking English, silly girl!” Hehehehe.

Patrons flooded in at intermittent intervals, and there were lulls throughout the night, but we were mostly busy.  Last table seating was at 11P or so, which meant that we were going to get out of there pretty late after clean-up (1:30AM, to be exact).

Dinner service was rough. By the end of the night, my hands and feet were hurting. I don’t know how it is they do it? I just couldn’t imagine having the energy to that everyday. Ludo, you and your teammates are tough.

Carina’s Tale:

I was getting my car serviced at Toyota of Glendale and Josie picked me up for a quick bite. She was tired and nervous and I was starving. We ate lunch and in the car she told me this silly story about Christina of Hot Pink Manolos texting her and her thinking it was someone else. It was hilarious and it seemed Christina wanted to go to Ludo Bites to see Josie but was told the same thing I was-that they restaurant was completely booked. I had no doubt I was going to go and I texted Christina to see if she wanted to go anyway with me. She was totally down and as a Pasadena local we decided to carpool. I thought we should go to the restaurant at 9:30 and she agreed and would be meeting another friend there. I was sitting at home on my computer and texted Josie to see how she was doing. There was no response and I was slightly concerned for her. Around 6:20 I received two texts from her, that read:

Someone got yelled at 4 using the phone. I’m in the bathrm. Someone asked who I came in with last time and I said, “My baby mama.” haha. I am a riot here. Jokester has arrived. Tweet this for me, please! Gotta Go!

I was laughing but I listened to my master’s orders and logged on to Twitter. I couldn’t believe it as soon as I, a Twit, tweeted I noticed that Chef Ludo had just done the exact same thing. His tweet said:

@chefludo running late for service b/c Josie @uncouthgourmand was busy putting on make-up. girls….

Christina was tweeting to me as well to see if I could read all of this silliness and of course I could and could not stop laughing. I called Christina to see if she wanted to meet up earlier to check out a new wine bar in Pasadena that was going to do a soft-soft-opening. She happily obliged. She picked me up, I asked her for shoe advice, must I mention her blog name again-Hot Pink Manolos, and we headed on out. Noir Food and Wine is on Mentor just above Colorado Blvd. next to the Ice House and my favorite consignment shop, Ritz Resale, which is next to a medical marijuana store. Anyway, the $50 Dior skirt suit deals are made more entertaining by the pungent aroma that enters from their neighbors. We walked right in, got a seat at the bar, and were poured some of very nice glasses of wine by the sommelier, Jared. We were also introduced to the owner, Mike, who was part of  Vertical Wine Bar and opened Wine Bar 112 and Red Carpet Wine Bar in the past. It was clear that Mike knew two things: wine and the area. When Jared showed us his pride and joy, the wine list, he had to admit that most of the list was made by Mike. In case you haven’t gotten it yet from their name, Pinot Noir is their main wine. It takes up a good 4 pages of the wine list.

The whole experience was so enjoyable; we got some complimentary appetizers and upon talking to the staff it became clear that everyone had worked for Mike before in some capacity or at one of his older projects. This was also the first time I had hung out with Christina alone and she was cracking me up telling me about the texts from Josie and her inner dialogue saying, “I am not who Josie thinks I am…just please don’t text me anything dirty”. We left with more than a couple of glasses in our system and while we were exiting Mike was sitting outside with a man who was down on his luck. I asked Mike for a picture with him and the man, whom I am sure has not had a nice bite to eat or a fine wine to drink in quite a while, said that he would love to be in the picture as well. I was groped a little bit but it was all quite nice. Christina and I both mentioned what a kind gesture that was of Mike, and how we gained so much more respect for him. The restaurant will open sometime between this Friday and next Tuesday and I really can’t wait to go back. Small space but unusually friendly people and great wine.

I received another text from Josie saying that there had been some cancellations and to come in at 9:30 as planned. I texted her back asking her to put us on the list for 3. Christina and I got to LudoBites around 9:50 and her friend had been waiting awhile. I talked to Chef Ludo’s wife and told her we had a reservation. She looked perplexed and said, “Are you sure? I talked to you on the phone the other day and said that we were all booked up”. I said, “Yes, but Josie put us down for 9:30″. Josie peaked out from the kitchen and said, “Sorry, I haven’t been allowed to look at my phone.” Anyway, his wife is the best and said we could have a table in a half an hour. We ( Christina, her friend Elise, and I) all walked to Third Stop for yet another glass of wine. It was here that I said my funniest line of the night, “OMG, I am so hungry! I haven’t eaten anything since lunch…wait, is that normal?” The girls were laughing and Christina said that was definitely going in her blog.

We walked back to Ludo Bites and were so ready to eat. We ordered a lot, almost as much as Jonathon Gold did the first night we were there. We had the heirloom salad, the green bean and apple salad, the escargot, the lobster medallions, the polenta and the cod. The food was all good and the cod that I ordered was by far my favorite of the night. I really don’t want to complain as my other half, who is practically me, made it. Although, I did Tweet at one point, “Josie assalted my food”. The girl loves salt and at one point in the night she passed a note through the busboy Luis that read, “I am finding it difficult to control my seasoning (salt & pepper) Help! -J”

When Chef Ludo came out I told how much I liked our Australian waiter and the busboy, Luis, who was passing me notes from Josie and even drew me a picture. Chef Ludo laughed and said, “Okay, well then, I will keep him and you take her back (pointing at Josie)”. I laughed and he said she was a princess and was very messy. I can say that in a perfect French accent, just ask Josie but I have to be drunk for it to come out well. I told him she is not that much of a princess, I won’t even go in the kitchen. He smiled, shook his hand and head, and walked back in to the kitchen. Oh I forgot the best part. Josie was being blamed for dropping the last foie gras cupcake on the floor and thus not giving Christina her ordered dessert. We all believed that was the truth as it came from Ludo, the waiter, and more. Josie swore they were just blaming her and Chef Ludo brought out some panacotta with caramel and caviar on the house since they were out of the two desserts. I managed to drop this dessert multiple time on my leg. I literally had to lick caviar off my knee…talk about an uncouth gourmand. It was a great night and I was so proud of Josie. I got a ride back with her and we celebrated at Tony’s Bar until we left when the bartenders were locking up. I would say we had our first drunken sleepover in a long time but we are trying to dispel lesbian rumors which are running rampant!

Avant 30 ans c’était plutôt ça : « Hey les mecs on part une semaine. Pour la bouffe : budget 20€, on se fera des pates on s’en fou. Qui a pensé à la caisse de vodka par contre ? »

Depuis on chante une autre histoire. Une histoire d’amour et de calories, une histoire de traditions et de bon goût. Déjà parce que dans notre tribu on abrite un gourou culinaire, un esthète de la fourchette qui ne sort pas de Paris sans son guide Michelin, qui connait les spots de cuisine fusion au fin fond du Vietnam, de cuisine moléculaire aux tréfonds de Barcelone. Alors forcement ça aide, car s’il ne dédaigne pas un bon Mc Do les jours de flemme, il penche plutôt pour le burger au foie gras de Daniel Boulud à New York. Autant dire que la barre est haute.

Ensuite parce que les vacances et WE en tribu, c’est une zone libre. Une espèce de zone franche ou on ne compte plus les calories, ou on met entre parenthèses le sports et autres fat-burner. On vit. On est bien. On profite, du soleil, de la mer, de la piscine, des enfants (rayer la mention inutile). On se dira bien plus tard dans la voiture le train ou l’avion que oui vraiment c’est décidé :  la diète, le sevrage, le sport c’est pour maintenant. On a déjà le bronzage et l’air épanoui. Pour le reste on a la vie devant nous.

Alors depuis quelques années nos escapades ressemblent de plus en plus à une nouvelle de Philipe Delerm. On ne laisse rien au hasard. On cherche notre madeleine partout. On passe des plombes à errer dans les superettes des autochtones. On retourne toute la boutique pour trouver les langoustines qui vont bien avec la mayonnaise de notre maitre Sauces. On délègue notre caviste attitré pour dégotter des perles vinicoles dans la cave. On adopte les coutumes locales avec une mention spéciale pour la cuisine corse. On se régale, on passe 4 heure à table avant d’aller à la plage, et on revient affamé, et plein de nouvelles idées. Après tout il est déjà 16h, c’est l’heure de l’apéro.

C’est dantesque, c’est le Banquet, c’est beaucoup de fou rires et un max de calories. Notre journée type ferait défaillir le Dr Cohen.
• Lever, petit dej, Nutella, confitures, brioches = 1 500 calories
• Ballade sur les marchés provençaux = -200 calories, parce que porter les cabas c’est du sport
• Pré apéro dans les primeurs Corse, rosé et charcuterie, melon pour la conscience, les Corses savent décidemment recevoir = 400 calories
• Apéro au bord d’une piscine, et tiens si on sortait le foie gras le moelleux, puis la mayonnaise, les crevettes, des tartines ? Des anchoillades ? Des tapenades ? = 900 calories
• Déjeuner gastronomique du terroir : trop difficile à détailler = 1000 calories
• Vin = 1000 calories
• Le fromage qui fond sur la tartine de pain couverte de figues, sur le barbecue = 400 calories

• Sieste = -80 calories. Sieste crapuleuse = -200 calories. Choisissez votre camp.
• Escapade à la plage = – 300 calories, Escapade à la piscine = -200 calories.
Non, non je ne suis pas partiale, simplement, pour accéder à la plage qui va bien, il faut ramper sous le grillage après le grand pin, compter encore 3 arbres, tourner à gauche, sauter les dunes, ne pas regarder dans les dunes, car oui ce sont les cigales qui crient…

• Retour à la casa, debrief de la journée, comparationnage de traces de maillots, de targets, lecture des cahiers de vacances et autres carnets d’envie = -500 calories. Car oui refaire le monde est une activité physique à part entière.
• Prendre sa douche avec ses cops, muscat et chips à portée de main, rire à en pleurer, glisser, s’exploser par terre, briser les verres, rire à en hurler.
• Prendre un bain avec 8 cops, et une bouteille de champagne, chanter à tue tête pendant une heure pour tester la raisonnance d’un Ryad, glisser, s’exploser, rire encore = – 1000 calories

• Re apéro, re diner, re vin, re dijo, re-refaire le monde, re-refaire nos vies, tout changer sauf notre tribu, nos amis, nos amours, re-projeter nos meilleures années, nos meilleurs moments, ré-inventer les prochains, faire pleins de projets, des projet de voyage, des projets de partir, des projets de boulot, de vacances, danser, re-chercher des menus pour demain, des trucs qu’on a pas encore gouter, des trucs qu’on aimerait encore gouter.
= 1000+ 2000 + 500 + 100 – 500 – 300 -800 -200 calories

 Bilan des courses = 3 kilos par semaine, quelques bleus (rapport aux glissades), des courbatures dans les abdos, des traces de maillots, 3 tubes de Biafine, des caisses de champagnes, autant de souvenirs, 3 grinçages de dents, 1 compile de l’été, 1 ou 2 engueulades pour pimenter et des millions de miles au compteur.

Le bonheur… si je veux !

Similar to 80’s Prom 2 weeks ago, the UGs ran in to the bathroom not to smoke but rather take photos, check make-up, and scuttlebutt. Sometimes I am shocked we are not in high school; we still giggle incessantly, high-five over lollipop cocktail stirrers and have to spit out watermelon gum upon arriving at any event. We felt slightly nervous about attending Blogger Prom, after all everyone was equipped with cameras and the guests (all invite-only) had to Tweet in song requests to the DJ;  this was a high class event with “professionals”. In the last two weeks we have attended: the Yelp 007 party at the same beautiful venue, The Andaz Hotel; and we were just at 80’s Prom thrown by Drink, Eat, Play. However, Blogger Prom was a combo of the two and this was the big time. Our training wheels were off and we actually had to look the part…a blog was posted last week on Blogger Prom that was entitled “No Cheesy; No Entry: Strict Dress Code will be Enforced”…this sent chills down the UG’s spines. I found my dress the day before. On the day of I bought a new color appropriate strapless bra at my favorite Macys, the one on Lake in Pasadena. I am fortunate enough to live within 5 blocks of two different Macys, but always  chose the one on Lake Ave. because I can’t forget the incredible deals they gave right before they closed for the remodel. I looked horrible, unshowered, just ate a ton of my favorite pizza, the Lasagna Pizza at Dino’s in Burbank, and had been studying with my classmate all morning for our managerial economics midterm. I grabbed a bra and as I was walking out, I said hello to my favorite make-up girl, Angel, at the Benefit Cosmetic counter. I love the brand (as they are SF-based, very light natural looks and witty packaging). I love Angel because she knows her stuff, has been in the industry for a long time, gives great make-up advice, and as an artist uses people’s faces as her canvas. She asked how UG was going and I told her I was going to Blogger Prom later that night. She suggested I come back in an hour after showering and in my dress. I raced home, bathed, came back, and she worked her magic. Borrowing from the different counters she complied the best cheesy, but still meticulous done bright blue eyeshadow with blue mascara to match. She spent an hour with me, a half an hour past when she was supposed to get off work, and made something beautiful out of what I could have made clown wear. I recommend you go and see Angel as she is the angel of the make-up world!

I left with my hot look, got kisses blown to me on the freeway, and picked up Josie from work. I forgot the corsage; I suck as a prom date! She had a bag full of accessories and we began to get ready in the car. I drove and Josie did a complete costume change. At one point we were in Sun Valley and Josie said, “The guy in the other car is looking at us”. I laughed replying, “Maybe that’s because you just took off your clothes and put a dress on”. She replied, “Oh yeah”. We arrived at the beautiful Andaz hotel around 7:40 the event started at 7 and we got checked in and took the elevator up to the top floor where we were at the Yelp Party. The look of the venue was very different. This was a lounge as opposed to the James Bond casino themed tables that covered the floor for the Yelp event. However, the food, bar, and cheese set up was just about the same. We remembered the beef skewers were the way to go. However, at Blogger Prom the cheese selection by The Cheese Impresario and cocktails created by The Liquid Muse raised the bar to a level that we didn’t even know existed. There was only one thing cheesier than the cheese plates and that was the fashion…OMG!

There was a raffle that was going on at several different points in the night and one of the first times was right after this guy walked by and said, “Hey” in an oh-so Hollywood way. I laughed and looked at the girls next to me commenting, “Who does that guy think he is, Pauly Shore?!?!” I assumed he was just a blogger who thought he was hot hollywood stuff. One second later, I said,”Wait, is that Pauly Shore?”. The girl next to me said, “Yes, I thought you knew that”. Pauly was there to announce the raffle prize for some tickets to the Comedy Store. The UGs ended up pretty empty handed in the raffle until the very end. Josie won a sake set and I was empty handed with an empty drink and a mini cupcake wrapper in my hand.

However, by the end of the night I was definitely not empty-handed. Sino Soul gave me a shirt he won that said, “In space no one can hear you tweet”. We also got amazing gift bags equipped with sex lubricants, ear plugs, shirts that say “Born to” on the front and “Blog” on the bag, Big Bang Theory on DVD (love it-Pasadena based) and many more fun items. Josie was most excited about the shirts and got two of the born to blog and traded me the Tweet shirt for her sake set. Score. Oh and that bag of Sun Chips served us very well on the drive home.

Not to be completely cheesy, although it does fit the theme, but the best part about the whole event was interacting with all the other local bloggers. We met our blogger idols, foodemies, crushes, and people that we already feel like we know. Eating LA we had only met once before, prior to ever having our blog and it was such a pleasure to shake hands with her. Food GPS we have an upcoming dinner with but we had never met him either. We got to meet Gastronomy blog and I asked where her husband the astronomer is and he turned around and shook my hand. The thing about the blogging world is that while there is some anonymity these are real people that share their thoughts and opinions with you on a weekly basis. They are all quite charming and it was such a pleasure that we had the opportunity to meet them all at once. We, the Uncouth Gourmands, have three main values at our core and they are: Fun, Food, and Friendship. This Blogger Prom provided them all and in spades. We give a huge thank you to the prom committee for organizing this great event. H.C. you are our Prom King despite what vegetarian may have taken the crown. Here we are with Daily Gluttony, AV Flox, The Delicious, Hot Pink Manolos, and Let Me Eat Cake! For a list of attendants click here and for more pictures click here

Yesterday, was my day off from school and I spent the day with my dear friend Tony (or Toe Knee, as he is known to my BlackBerry). We had lunch at Nicole’s Gourmet Foods, Belgian beer, a tennis match in over 85 degree heat, popsicles, followed by several cocktails and wine at my house as we watched bizarre movies and listened to The Kinks and Buddy Holly. His girlfriend Zena laughed while at lunch I declared that Tony would be my stylist for the Bond themed Yelp Elite party that night. I had a gold dress in mind that I wore to my brothers sushi and disco party but Tony said absolutely not as I look like a choir singer in a black church. He demanded I wear a red dress that was actually a prom dress but we compromised on a gold and silver geometric dress. I was in a great mood when I picked up Josie to go to the party. I have waited over 2 years to be Elite and this is the first party I was able to attend. Josie was sleepy as she had been up since 5am and the Hollywood Bowl traffic made our yawns more contagious and more exhausting. However, upon entering the Andaz Hotel for the event and taking the elevator up to the exclusive poolside Panorama Room our mood magically transformed and we got a second burst of energy. We got our stickers and Josie went straight to the cheese table. The food was provided by RH restaurant located on the lower level of the hotel. Our favorites of the night were the beef skewers, the cheeses, and the mushroom stir-fry. We also learned that cocktails were all free but a soda water was 2 dollars. We had a great time and there was a villain look-alike contest, a bond girl contest, and then the award for best James Bond impression.

As with almost any event that the UGs attend the number one thing is the people we encounter. We met some great Yelpers and it is a group I am really proud to be a part of, Josie’s line all night was, “I married in to the Yelp family”. One gentleman we met referred to Josie as Eva Mendes, himself as Jet Li’s cousin, and he called Uncouth Gourmands -Haiku Fromage- causing Josie to spit out her drink in a fit of laughter.

The only lame people we met all night were Paris and Sarah Michelle. They were as boring as cardboard.

We are looking forward to attending many other Yelp events both Elite and Unofficial. Elite events are pretty great because of the classiness, free food, and free drinks but trust me the UG girls are not above the great taco truck crawl events. We caught up with some old friends. Thank you Tony C. aka Sino Soul for trying to get us dates and Javier J. for giving us some cash to tip our bartenders. We also met a ton of great new friends like, Charlie, who works for the hotel restaurant RH. We also were pleased to meet the French chef, Sebastien Archambault, at the RH restaurant who invited to enjoy a meal there in the near future. It was great event, the hotel offered a View to Kill (stole that pun from Dawson-sorry I have very few Bond references), and we are excited to come back for dinner and Blogger Prom! Please feel free to add me as your Yelp friend and don’t forget to review the event on Yelp.

As far as drama in the food blogging world in LA goes, there was no day quite as dramatic as this last Wednesday. As I am sure you all know, there was big controversy about Eater LA posting libelous claims against The Must Bar. This incident brought birth to lawsuit claims towards Eater LA, LA Times articles, thousands of food bloggers chiming and 160+ comment on the actual article. Josie and I often joke that we don’t play hard to get enough, but surely as soon as Sino Soul sent us a DM on Twitter asking us if we wanted to join him and a bunch of bloggers that night for dinner in Koreatown we jumped all over the opportunity. We wanted to eat, laugh, and make new foodie friends. Plus, we wanted an inside scoop on the day’s controversy. Josie arrived from work a half an hour late, but I beat her and was close to an hour late. Sino Soul thinks he’s so snarky and the badass in the food blogging world with his motorcycle and fancy camera, but he is really an extremely sweet guy. He introduced us to everyone (even though he mixes us up), organized the whole dinner, ordered for us, and helped Josie with her multiple UG spills of the night. Our restaurant that played host for the evening was, Jun Won, a modest homestyle diner of Korean food. The high-notes of the meal: the shiso/perila leaves, the eun dae gu jorim (black cod stew), and my favorite was the seafood pancake. One of the fellow diners, Amy of The Roaming Belly said it reminded her of a flaccid penis. I am actually blogging right now with Josie and I said, “I don’t know, I liked it.” She laughed and responded, “You would”. My response was, “That’s true, I do have a thing for limp fries”. The food was mediocre to good but the company was great and it was nice making some new food blogging friends and some new foodemies.

The other bloggers/food enthusiasts in attendence were:

• Teri aka TeriLA on Twitter
• Jessica of the very clever Eat, Sip, Chew
• Sook of Yutjangsah
• Steve of Infinite Fress -who I think hated us, as Josie kept saying, “He needs to watch The Secret“. Sino Soul even wrote this on his Twitter: dinner w @uncouthgourmand makes @infinitefress hit In N Out
  

We asked Steve what he thought of Ludo Bites after Sino Soul said that he had just been. Apparently, along with not liking us, Steve also didn’t like that hot hunk of a French chef of a man known as Ludo Lefebvre. He even entitled his review, Ludo Bites, using the name of the pop-up restaurant that Ludo runs at BreadBar for the remainder of the summer. We took his review with a grain of salt as we realized that Steve seems like a hard man to please and were very excited about visiting the restaurant that Friday. The reason we chose that day was because our food friend and cook book author, Eli of Freshman in the Kitchen, won a contest on Twitter to be Ludo’s sous chef for the night. We were running late as usual and arrived with our friend Jason who is helping us with the UG promo video. As we walked into Breadbar (Ludo Bites for the night), we were in hysterics because as I was walking behind Josie, I found a tag on her shirt which I pulled off while walking through the door. Eli looked up from the open front kitchen as he knew that there were only two girls that would walk in to a restaurant cracking up and with an uncouth moment. Only maybe 5 minutes after being seated we had the lovely Mr. and Mrs. Ludo come to our table and chat. I turned my head to the side and there walking in was Jonathan Gold. The tension in the air began to resonate. He had no reservation and took our Ludo away from us but only momentarily. We joked to our friend, Jason, that all of the most important food critics were in the restaurant that night. We asked Chef Ludo’s wife, who I am sure is tagged as the most hated woman in Los Angeles, to surprise us with some appetizers. She is actually one of the sweetest women and hooked us big time offering us the cantaloupe, chorizo, and cornichon cold soup and the heirloom salad.

Josie had the veal sweetbread with foie gras and asian pear. I had the hanger steak with black sesame miso and white asparagus. Jason went with the peanut crusted seared duck, which was very good.

Carina’s Review: Was it one of best meals? No, not at all. Was it one of my favorite experiences in a restaurant? Absolutely. When the first dishes arrived our whole table commented on what good quality balsamic and tomatoes were utilized in the salad. It wasn’t like the $10,000 machine that impregnates each blanched tomato with vinegar that they have at Bazaar, but it was pretty great. Similar to most French cooking, it is quality in simplicity. The cantaloupe, chorizo, cornichon didn’t really work for me. I liked the risk, it was unusual and different, but the cornichon/sweet pickle slush in the soup was a risk that, for me, didn’t resonate. Everyone knows I am lover of pickles, I packed a jar of cornichons in my suitcase from the South of France to LA risking pickle juice all over my clothes and luggage. However, the flavor components of this dish, while interesting, weren’t pleasant on my palate. The steak was good. I rarely order it so it is always a nice treat. Where this restaurant shined most was on service. Chef Ludo’s wife was just as charming if not more, than Chef Ludo. We got pecks on each side of our cheeks by both husband and wife and got invited into the kitchen to say goodbye to Eli. He was very happy with the way that Chef Ludo treated him, allowing him to plate, try everything as it was cooking, and giving him a big piece of foie gras upon entering. It was a fun night and I am grateful that Josie and I make people laugh and be silly with us. It was a great juxtaposition to Jonathan Gold outside who ordered everything on the menu but two items and made even us nervous. We left with big smiles, happy bellies, and a reaffirmation that food, chefs, critics, and restaurants in LA are truly great.

Josie’s Review: I fell in love with the place! Ludo Bites is a quaint spot with dismal lighting and fantastic food! I, being the truest commitment phobic, was in love. The cantaloupe and chorizo soup- a true tantalizer. At first, I didn’t know what the slush was (truth is, I hardly ever read about what I’m about to put in my mouth until after I’m swallowing) and in fact, as I chewed I grimaced and thought to myself, “what the f!@* was that?” However, after a brief moment, I was pleasantly surprised! The taste teetered on the balance of unfamiliar and exciting. Quick gratitude came to my mind and I thanked Ludo’s wife for sending it over and introducing us it. As for my veal, I loved it as well. My only complaint was that there wasn’t enough to satiate my robust appetite, but I need to cut down and start watching my waistline anyway, I suppose. Above anything, I felt a little French for the night. In true French fashion, the marriage of food, fun, and friendships rolled full circle. The process of eating was not only about fulfilling a desire to eat, but rather to get to know each other by conversing and laughing. The process of eating became almost ancillary, but not forgotten; mainly so, because the food at Ludo challenges you to do something a bit more ambitious than to put something in your mouth and swallow-it challenges you to think about what it is you’re tasting. It’s good to be reminded of such things in our busy fast-food everyday life. In short, kudos to Ludo Bites!

Afterwards we headed to Third Stop for a drink and for a shared nutella, chocolate, and berry pizza for dessert. It was good but we were still on such a high from Chef Ludo and our favorite sous chef, Chef Eli.

We have been very poor Uncouth Gourmands lately and sadly had to miss Pasadena Restaurant Week, but there was one event that we were not willing to miss…Taste of the Nation LA. It featured the best (high end) restaurants in LA, the best chefs in LA, and best of all it helped to end childhood hunger. The ticket price was too steep for us but we had an alternative, we could volunteer! As soon as our blogger idol, Eating LA, posted that volunteers were needed we jumped all over that. We had great, but always uncouth emails with the volunteer organizer Paul. He hooked us up with the book table area. We were thrilled; we love cookbooks, authors, chefs and combined is perfection. We grabbed our Starbucks and Noah’s Bagels (FYI-Josie wants you all to know that she thinks paying $3 for a bagel is atrocious) and were ready to take on hunger, ironically, by eating and helping to get cookbooks sold. Our new friend SinoSoul said it best on his Twitter, “Oxymoron: stuff your face @ Taste of the Nation so children can be fed. yet it’s hard not to have a blast…” We got our wristbands, shirts, and nametags and we helped to set up the cookbooks. Josie does design for a living and created a beautiful display that I helped implement. Our old friend (in our imagination) Jonathan Gold, aka the food god genius that’s “just not that into us”, was moved from our area to the LA Weekly booth. However, we were still going to be in the presence of amazing chefs and authors. Here is that famous shot of J. Gold uninterested in the Uncouth Gourmands to refresh your memory.

The cookbook authors were all extremely impressive. We met and helped sell books for Evan Kleinman (whose book was first published 19 years ago and is Executive Chef at Angeli Caffe), Mariel Hemingway (Oscar winner for playing Woody’s teenage girlfriend in Manhattan, healthy living expert, and granddaughter of Ernest Hemingway), Nancy Silverton (of La Brea Bakery and now Osteria Mozza), Michael Mina (world renowned chef who flew in from SF just for the event, we promised him we would visit XIV as soon as we had some dinero), and JoAnn Cianciulli (who will be speaking and cooking at Barnes & Noble in the Grove, just feet away from her inspiration, the Los Angeles Farmer’s Market, on the 24th). I know that for most of you these great chefs need no introduction but this is the uncouth version.

So all work and no food, didn’t the UGs get to eat? Let me put it this way, the chef at Border Grill walked up to Josie and said, “Everytime I have seen you, you have something different in your mouth and hands”. You better believe we ate. Since this all went to a great cause we will only discuss the great, but in all honesty we didn’t eat anything bad.

Carina is reluctantly Nobu obsessed. She doesn’t want to like it but loves it so much. The lettuce wrapped black cod was incredible. Josie is allergic to seafood so can’t comment.

Josie went crazy for the lambwich from Venice Beach Wines and by crazy I mean she ate more than two. Carina is not a big fan of lamb so shouldn’t judge such meat.

There were a few dishes that we both went crazy over. We loved the caprese salad with a big slice of a peach on it from Cube Cafe and Marketplace. Another dish we loved was the Reuben sandwich from bld Restaurant. This may be insignificant but I am obsessed with their logo and how it looks like a table and chairs, and stands for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. We haven’t seen a logo so cool since the u spork g for Uncouth Gourmands, relax, we kid. By the way, we have important news, I asked the owner if BLD is coming to Pasadena and she said, “There is some talk, how did you hear that?” I told her I read it on a Pasadena blog and she smiled confirming that it is in fact true. We are thrilled, we need some new restaurant blood in Pasadena. We ate a ton but it was so hot we mostly stuck to water and delicious iced lattes from LA Mill Coffee so we can’t really comment on the wine other then saying that there was a ton of wineries and breweries there. One cool drink we experienced was the Nitro Margarita with salt foam from Bazaar.

As with almost every eating event or experience it comes down to the people you are surrounded by. We are so thrilled that in the 6 months of having our blog we already have so many amazing foodie friends that we get to run into. Today we saw Tony of Sino Soul, Dawson and her Beer of Yelp LA, our friend and Freshman in the Kitchen author Eli, and Octavio of Palate. We even made a new friend, H.C. of the very popular LA and OC Foodie. I think we made some people angry when we took all the attention away from the authors as people came up to us and said, “Are you the Uncouth Gourmands?” Anyway, H.C. is very cool and we are so happy he approved us as guests for Blogger Prom.

Of course, when the UGs are in attendance at any event uncouthness is bound to ensue. We very much enjoyed the waiter race where some very quick and skilled waiters were doing the spilling, instead of us. Don’t worry we still had our share. At one point, Josie asked me to grab her another lambwich and I said, “No Josie, I just bought you a salad.” We started cracking up because all of the food was free and therefore my excuse sucked. All of the volunteers were kindly given a free pair of flip-flops at the end of the day. A man, concerned and out of breath, ran after Josie. Once he caught up with her, he tapped her on the shoulder and said, “Ma’am you left your shoes on the table”. I was in hysterics, there on the beautiful LA Mill spread was Josie’s flip-flops. Paul, the mathematician and volunteer coordinator, came up to us thinking that we were making fun of the shoes. Nope, just our own stupidity.

Anyway, it was such a truly great food event and we were so happy to get to be a part of it! I asked Josie in the car after we left, “If we would have paid $150 for the event would it have been worth it?” She said, “Yes, but we wouldn’t have been able to meet so many cool people.” That is true. Hopefully, next year we will be in the financial position to buy tickets but we still would want to volunteer to be part of this amazing event and cause.

On Thursday morning I was in bed taking care of business. No, not that! I was responding to emails on barely any sleep and following-up with the volunteer coordinator for Taste of the Nation about Josie and I volunteering for the event, in effort to save money. I was sleep deprived and uncouthly wrote, “we are at your disposable”. I Tweeted about this blunder and then read the greatest Tweet from InkFoodie offering a free dinner for two at Fleming’s for the first to answer this question: what year was Flemings launched in Newport Beach? Since I was still in bed, with a Blackberry in hand, I called Fleming’s in Newport and asked when they first opened. I received the answer right away, tweeted it, and was then declared a winner. I called Josie to tell her the good news and she was on her lunch break and said she just won a free Fro Yo at Ikea for filling out a survey. We were winners, for once. I had a plan to pick her up Friday night and head to our free dinner in Woodland Hills. However, in typical Uncouth Gourmand fashion something got in the way, I got a flat tire on the way there. It was my first ever. Josie rescued me. Of course, I chose dinner over AAA and just figured I would deal with it after a good meal and a couple of glasses of wine. Traffic was atrocious and parking was even worse. Neither one of us had cash for valet so we drove around forever. But hey it was our first free meal in a very long time and we were going no matter what. It was the Napa vs. Sonoma Dinner which meant a lot of wine. We were escorted to a private room with two large tables already filled with people on the first course, with a champagne flute down, and already on to their Napa and Sonoma glasses of Chardonnay. The first course was a seafood cocktail but Josie got carpaccio due to her allergy.

The second course was filet mignon with seared ahi and yukon potato balls. It was very good but I should have ordered mine rare. I looked at Josie and said, “Why don’t I ever eat steak?”. She said, “I know, it’s so good” We are not really steakhouse girls but that is mostly due to the ambiance which doesn’t always welcome our uncouthness. However, we are definitely meat eaters. It was around this time I was overwhelmed by how many drinks I had. I now had a Sonoma and a Napa fab cab to add to the drinks in front of me.

Our table mates were all tipsy and wonderful and were giving us dating advice. There was an engaged couple at our table with mom and dad. I grilled the son on where I can meet a nice Jewish man, like himself, as Jdate isn’t panning out. (Oh yeah, that is “grill” and “pan” in the same sentence and I am not even discussing food). Our favorite at the table was the husband and wife couple that was across from us. The husband is a writer for LA Daily News and the wife is on Twitter as well as being a cat lover and animal activist. We told them that we were thinking about going to The Hangover premiere after party later that night and the husband said, “I could have written that movie”. The wife was telling us how to meet a man and then said, “Maybe you two are soulmates”. We looked at each other and laughed.

The dessert was probably our favorite course. It was an apple cobbler with an aged cheddar. After the meal they did a raffle where every reservation group won a bottle of wine. It was my kind of raffle and I chose my favorite wine of the night the 2006 Picket Fence Chardonnay from Sonoma. I don’t know who won, Napa or Sonoma, but we definitely did! I kept getting the glasses confused and made them repeat a million times “Napa on the left and Sonoma on the right”. The best part of the evening was the company and the food but the $0.00 (say it like Dean Wormer in Animal House, zero point zero) check wasn’t too bad either.

It was a great meal and we want to thank Fleming’s for taking such great care of us and Ink Foundry for the opportunity to win. As soon as we got on the Freeway I called AAA so that they’d be at my car by the time I arrived. Of course, they weren’t. I listened to the amazing Denise Richards interview on Howard Stern while I waited; the wine from dinner also helped my impatience. Josie went to shower and change at her friends house and I met up with them later. It was very tricky not going over 50 on the freeway. I know it was National Donut Day but that doesn’t mean I wanted to drive on one! Josie’s friend, Krissy, ended up not wanting to go out, we decide to skip The Hangover after party at Elevate, and headed to Tony’s Bar instead. We hadn’t been there since the soft opening and our downtown friends were already there. The drinks were super strong, last time I went with beer so I couldn’t report on such things. Also the place was bustling, much more than the first time we went, and we discovered the ping-pong table outside.

Josie and I had our first date night in quite a while. I have to say that the whole thing was sort of put together by Twitter. I read on one of LAist tweets that Fiona Apple was playing a surprise show as a guest at Largo. I am a huge Fiona Apple fan; the Extraordinary Machine album was one of those life changing CDs for me. Josie is not much of a fan, so I purchased tickets first and told her about it second. She agreed. She was busy doing work on the Westside anyway so I simply met her down there after fighting through the always terrible drizzle traffic. I was having a very Josie-esque afternoon, dropping off my clothes at the cheapest fluff and fold (Spin Cycle in Highland Park-I will be forever indebted to Josie for telling me about this place), and then heading to Fashion 21 (the first Forever 21) to buy a raincoat as I was barely wearing any clothes in the rain. I picked up the tickets around 6:30 and while debating where to get some grub before the show Josie said, “Didn’t you tell me Nobu WeHo has a happy hour?” I did in fact say that because I read it on EatingLA’s tweet a couple of days ago. We both were nearly killed crossing La Cienega but it was totally worth it. I arrived at Nobu first and the bar was completely empty, business picked up greatly around 7:30. I had a couple of lovely $6 glasses of wine, Sophia’s Symphony, and began ordering from the Happy Hour menu. I started with the baby artichoke and leek salad and the ginger crusted scallops. Both were phenomenal, the artichokes were shaved and the scallops were amazing quality and were perfectly cooked/undercooked.

Josie has a very unfortunate allergy to almost all seafood. She had very limited choices and went with 2 bowls of rice and a hearts of palm salad which left her mouth on fire. It was delicious, but I am a girl that eats hearts of palm straight from the can on a regular basis. I was in food heaven and even commented to Josie that I could sit here all day and just order more and more. She laughed and said, “Wait until the bill comes”. I ordered some whitefish tiradito which I described as “insane good”. I am not that big of a sashimi fan and actually haven’t had it since I was in Tokyo for Christmas but this was out of this world. Super fresh, perfectly seasoned, and I was very glad I didn’t have to share. I think Josie was a bit annoyed. I was raving on and on and she got charged 7 dollars for a Sugarfree Redbull-with no vodka. Insanity. However, I was in food and wine heaven all night. I am still thinking about the food and wondering when I can go back. These kind of celebrity infused restaurants I really want to dislike or throw down words like “overrated” but the quality of fish and the flavor trumps all. I was really impressed.

I drove us to our next date stop slightly further down La Cienega. Tickets were $20 each and seating was assigned we definitely had princess seating, D22 and D24, in the small intimate theater. The first performer up was the charming and adorable Tom Brosseau, Josie said he reminded her of a cartoon character. The main performers, who have a monthly gig at Largo, was the Watkins Family. Comprised of brother and sister, Sean and Sara Watkins, formerly of Nickel Creek. They were amazing and apparently whoever is in town at the time joins them. Last night they had John C. Reilly (that’s right Dewey Cox himself), former Led Zeppelin bassist John Paul Jones on mandolin, and Fiona Apple. It was a great night of music from fiddles to cellos to mandolins.

No wonder Josie and I can’t get a date, we have too much fun together. Find me a man that can top Nobu and Fiona Apple with my bestie.

Last summer the Uncouth Gourmands ate and drank their way through Europe. Sadly, this summer we will be in town most of June. However, there is an upside, there are a whole bunch of cool food events going on this upcoming month. Here is our list thus far -we will be adding to it all month. Please let us know if we missed anything.

Gourmet 5 Year Old Party

Sunday, May 31st, 4:00-7:00PM

Tickets are $40 and the UGs love the concept. Think gourmet mac n’ cheese, sloppy Joe’s with Kobe beef, and everything else your gourmand belly would want if you were put back in kindergarten. We are unsure if we are attending this event, but we want full details if we don’t make it.

1st Annual Yelp Restaurant Week

Sunday, May 31st – Friday, June 5th

Take advantage of 3-course Yelp Prix Fixe menus specially priced from $25 – $30 (+ tax & gratuity)

Old Pasadena Restaurant Week

Monday, June 1st-Monday, June 8th

As Pasadena girls on a budget we will definitely be taking advantage of the discounted 3-course menus. Lunch is $15 & $25 and dinner is $25 & $35. The places we are planning on hitting up is Cafe Bizou and Red White + Bluezz. Also I was really impressed by our meal at Vertical Wine Bistro during DineLA week, so I may talk the wife (aka Josie) into revisiting there. We recommend skipping Pop Champagne and Dessert Bar, our last visit left us with a very bad taste.

Lummis Day Festival

Sunday, June 7, 10:30 am to 7:30 pm

It’s free with music, art, poetry, and dance. Plus delicious food in our favorite neighborhood-northeast Los Angeles. The headlining band is Wil-Dog of Ozomatli.

Top Chef Masters

Wednesday, June 10 10:oo PM on your TV

Okay, not necessarily an “event” but we love Top Chef and are very excited about the new season dubbed “The biggest foodie face-off”. Any predictions?

Taste of the Nation-Los Angeles

Sunday, June 14, 1:00-4:00 PM

The ticket price of $125 for general admission is a little steep for the UGs but it is for a great cause -to end childhood hunger in the US. There will be 46 of LA’s top chefs and an “Ask Jonathan” booth featuring our man, who has no interest in us, Jonathan Gold.

Yelp Dumpling Crawl

Saturday, June 27, 11:00 AM

I will definitely hit this one up. I was in a bad mood the other day and wrote this on my Twitter, “Trying to figure out how to turn my frown upside down..all I can come up with is dumplings”

et oui les voilà, en mai déjà, et elles ont déjà quelqeus jours!!!

merci la serre, les année d’expérience, les soins (bio!) attentifs et… l’industrie et l’agriculture capitalistes pour le réchauffement climatique et le co2 qui fait pousser les plantes plus vite (authentique)!

les premières fleurs de tomate (1), voyez comme ça marche bien les cages à tomates!

les premières fleurs de tomate (2)

c’est beau la vie!

ça va faire de belles salades pour les concerts du colporteur!

bien à vous,

nicogé, jardinier libertaire et pacifiste