I plan on watching lots of movies, listening to music, playing video games and generally doing whatever I feel like this week.

…in another dimension, maybe.  One where I don’t have six graduate school apps in the pipe and multiple projects and papers to finish.  A friend told me recently about a chart he’d seen once that compared factors that stress college students out – a death in the family was scaled as a 12, a divorce was scaled at 15, and applying to graduate school was an 80.  So that’s kinda how things are right now.

Had a great lunch with Kelly today and (as happens when you talk to him) had an involved and encouraging conversation about church history, scriptural authority and the often-overlooked Jewishness of Christ.  Studying and/or observing the Jewish Feasts as Jesus did is a concept I’m becoming more and more interested in.  It’s odd how much Christianity has tried to distance itself from Jewish tradition, and I don’t think it’s been a real big benefit to the body.

In other news, tonight I visited Happy Yogurt, the local frozen yogurt shop on Northgate, a couple of blocks from my apartment.  I’d driven by a few times before, but had never been inside – for what reason, I have no idea, because it’s now definitely my favorite spot in the B/CS area.  It’s probably the most appropriately named place I’ve set foot in for a while, because everything from the bright, colorful interior to the friendly owner (and her hilarious mother) puts a smile on your face.  The yogurt is great (they have food too) and it’s the perfect spot to hang out or work on homework since they’re open until…whenever you leave.  Seriously.

I mean, I like a coffee shop as much as the next college student, but the dim lighting and hipster atmosphere starts to get old after a while, don’t you think?  Happy Yogurt is a breath of fresh air, and it’s literally a stone’s throw away from me.  Go there right now and get some yogurt that’ll put a smile on your face.  They’re still open!

Huh.  Just looked at the clock and it appears that today is my birthday.  How about that?

For my final paper in my “History of Literary Criticism” class, I am reading Michael Berube’s Employment of English. When I read that professors in the 60s had three job offers by the time they had their PhDs in hand–that today’s graduates should have at least one book published, several scholarly articles, and a handful of conference presentations under their belt–that Yale actively busted its graduate student union, and that some community colleges pay $800 per course–I want to riot.

Berube agreed with Robert Scholes that graduate programs should cut down on their admissions in order to reduce the supply of labor. Hopefully, with a diminished labor supply, the performance bars will lower to a more reasonable level and graduate, adjunct, and permanent faculty compensation would improve. Access to education has been a crucial issue, and I think affirmative action has been effective for increasing the diversity of students and faculty at universities. Even those damn pinkos on the Supreme Court have ruled that there is value in a diverse student body. However,  I have a big problem with the elitism of universities, particularly with respect to class, and I see the limiting of access to graduate programs as a counterproductive measure.

I believe many schools have taken Scholes’s and Berube’s advice. I don’t really want to defame anybody right here right now for various selfish reasons.  I think there are a couple criteria that schools overlook in selecting students and that one of those is class. Making criteria for admission stricter through standardized exams like the Subject GRE and the supposedly meritocratic measure of grades makes it more difficult for some students to find their way into graduate programs.

The cost of the GRE might be an issue for some. The company that administers the test offers fee waivers, but offers no real explanation for who is eligible for them.  The subject GRE is only administered in a limited number of  areas, and hopefully, you have transportation to those areas. If you do not have a vehicle, you might be out of luck. Some schools expect you to include something in a personal statement about how you will pay for your education and having low or no income could cause you to be rejected on the basis that you might have sufficient income to complete the program.

While I disagree with Berube quite a bit on several issues, his book is the first time I really became aware of the widespread exploitation of graduate students AND faculty, even at an elite institution like Yale (which has a $16 BILLION endowment). Additionally, he offers a convincing and principled defense of English. I wonder about the real chances of getting universities to pay faculty a fairer or in some cases, a living wage, and then Berube’s proposals for institutional and curricular reform seem really not all that bad.

Corporate-style management of universities is here to stay, so the question is how future faculty will negotiate the changes. Yeah, the Carnegie Foundation for the Advancement of Teaching really fucked things up when they saw that faculty- run universities were more efficient than universities run like corporations, but decided to encourage the development of corporate governance anyway. But I don’t think there’s anything we can really do about that now, other than expose the stupidity.

The stakes are very high for me personally, but for United States society as well. Elitism at universities is a problem, but it is a benefit as well. Tenure allows scholars to undertake controversial work and tell the truth, even when it’s unpopular. The general management trend at universities has been to cut tenure positions and have graduate students and adjuncts pick up the slack.

The book is somewhat dated, but I think classrooms and universities are highly contested spaces. Amardeep Singh read Berube’s book in 2004 and still considered it relevant, even beyond Berube’s personal insights into the culture wars of the 90s.

While at Penn State, I took a class that Berube’s wife Janet Lyon instructed. I still remember her pointing out that the strange phrase “having your hand on all the ropes” in Howard’s End was nautical language. Was it the language of empire?  Oh, how I miss the days when I was care and debt free. If you’re considering going to graduate school to study English, you might want to read Employment of English first.

I like to keep an eye on my blog stats, especially where people come from and what terms they use to search. What can I say? I’m interested in how people look for and find things; that’s one of the reasons I became a librarian.

This post has always been at the top of my hit list, holding steady at a few hits per week, but today I noticed an unusual amount of recent hits and a new referring link.

That’s right: my post is required reading for a graduate-level class in information organization (taught by Candy Schwartz, no less!).  I think the course outline is well-rounded and addresses many of the issues I’ve described in that post and others since. I have no idea if my post is useful or used as some sort of discussion springboard for rebuttal, but if it’s helping students think about things in a new way, I’m glad.

I gotta say, though, it is a bit weird to see one of your blog posts cited formally, especially alongside Chan, Taylor, and the DDC itself! That’s some seriously intimidating company!

So, my mission for today, besides making cookies with Mom and putting together a package of Christmas presents for my grandparents, is to compile the things I need for the graduate programs to which I’m applying. It’s some sexy stuff. I’m making a list with the schools I’m considering and everything they require. It’s mostly the same stuff: the application, a statement of purpose, recommendation letters, transcripts (they’re going to shit when they see my stellar GPA), fees, and my portfolio. What I want for Christmas? All these application fees paid for. Did you notice what’s not on that list? Test scores, that’s what. Why? Because I’m only applying for schools that don’t require the GRE. What’s that? The Graduate Record Examination, a standardized test like the SAT only for graduate school. Why aren’t I taking it? You sure do ask a lot of questions…

I’d like to say it’s because I’m outraged at standardized testing and that it’s all pointless, and actually, to some degree, I really do believe that. But the truth is I just missed the deadline. You have to sign up for it months in advance and the only one I could take now falls after the application deadline for most schools. Dumb. But, really, if I’m going into creative writing, like 90% of what they judge me on should be my portfolio anyway. So I’m respecting the schools that ignore test scores…or something like that.

Anyway, the point is that Dr. Caldwell told me yesterday that I’m “competitive” insofar as like, I’m worth getting picked up by schools. It made my heart flutter. Besides being an amazing instructor and all around genius, she’s also an incredibly nice lady. Say what you will about big universities, I highly doubt any of those professors would take time out of their day to seek you out after they hear about your breakup to comfort you and let you cry to them. God, I love her.

But that brings me to something else: I recently had a talk with Raymond. Like, a good talk. Not a talk really, though, but a text-talk. Still, it was actually meaningful. I told Mrs. Brown the other day that sometimes I have these dreams, nightmares really, that I’m either married to or engaged to Raymond and he makes me feel awful throughout them but there’s no way for me to get out and all I can think to myself is “Why are you doing this?” She told me I need to, for lack of what she exactly said, triumph over those “memories.” So, when Raymond texted me out of the blue over the weekend I was ready to just go on ignoring him, but then I decided I may as well just talk and get it all out.

And it turned out all right. Because the truth is, I’m happy for him. I always wanted him to be happy–I did love him after all. That’s the reason why I almost went through with the whole marriage thing–I didn’t want him to be unhappy. Of course, that would have been the wrong reason, but it makes a kind of sense, in some crazy ass world. But I told him that I felt like he’d been purposefully saying things to make me feel like shit and that, in turn, would actually make me feel like shit–to think he wanted me to feel terrible. Anyway, whatever because as it turns out everything’s all good.

But that brings me to this: I went on a date. Two actually. And I called it my first date ever which is sad considering I’m 22 and 1/3 years old, but it’s kind of true; I was with Raymond for something like three years before he got his license and we could go places together, so that was really just like being with my best friend–no butterflies or anything. And after him, well, I don’t think going to somebody’s bedroom exactly counts as a date, does it? So, I feel like the Red Sox in ‘04. I did believe, for a while there, that bad things were going to happen to me because I had some something bad to someone else.

But it was worth waiting all this time for it to happen. And that’s all I have to say about that

My house is frigid even though the heat is on. Brrrrrrrrrrr. Before heading out to babysit, I made my quinoa salad minus the quinoa and cranberries. Basically it’s just cooked mushrooms, peppers and onions tossed with olive oil and chickpeas. Kinda boring if you ask me. I want to add something sweet to it but I don’t really have anything at the house. I think I’ll add the rest of the goat cheese for extra flavor. I forgot to mention earlier that my lunch salad had roasted edamame in it. Those little green nuggets add such a nice crunch and they only contain  two ingredients: roasted edamame and sea salt. Not too shabby. I also ate a banana.

I'm eating this now.

Tonight I am supposed to have another 8 o’clock library meeting cause one of our group member bailed last night. Total crap. I’m hoping it doesn’t take place even though we present on Thursday night and we have nothing prepared. The Queen of Procrastination is at it again.

I’m trying to explore different visual languages for the Keys You Trust Brand Book. Read more about my KYT idea here. These spreads are the ones I did over the weekend workshop, but looking at them now, they feel too generic and sterile. I tried to counter-balance the sparseness with personal stories of people’s keys through their own words. After I took a few photos of people’s keys in studio, I asked them different questions like, “what key is most important? which one is the most interesting?” etc. I used their quotes as captions to each keychain—a mini-story in every set. My idea is to have the majority of the book be real keys and real quotes from everyone in studio to reiterate how our keys are much more than just pieces of metal we lug around 24/7. They’re important to us, and they should be treated accordingly.

I really like the variety of voices in all the quotes, but it’s not visually engaging enough. I’m going to shoot for 3 distinctly different visual directions to try in the next week. I’ve also found some inspiration for the actual key blanks. I’d like them to be one color on the exterior and a different contrasting color on the interior taking my first set of inspiration from the Le Creuset cookware.

I love the color palette of Le Creuset pots and pans, and I associate quality , family and authentic care and craft with the brand. I think having keys in the colors similar to the ones pictured would be a good start.

So much has happened lately, a lot of which is just I did this for one class, and read this for another. I gave a presentation for one professor, and so on and so forth. I sometimes feel that being a graduate student drowns other things out of your life in certain ways.

But that’s not all! I’ve been cooking a lot lately, and falling in love with the strange fruits and vegetable available in this part of the world. In a sense, I’m setting myself up for over-priced asian grocery store dependency whenever I move away from East Asia, but I cannot say that I mind terribly much. The solitary other female vegetarian here and I have become friends and lunch-slash-dinner buddies as of late. I tell her that we would be doomed to companionship even if we detested each other’s company, so we are fortunate to have actually hit it off. Between the two of us, a lot of culinary magic is occurring around the time of day when you stomach starts to grumble. It is very good to have a partner in crime, because the overcrowded kitchens are not worth braving to cook a one person meal. The kitchens are a few kinds of horrifying, especially for we few of the vegetarian persuasion.

A few weeks ago there was an around the world at IUJ event where students set up booths exhibiting their region of the world, or nation in the case of a high enough concentration of students (such as Indonesia, Thailand and India). I helped with the Americas, because we didn’t have enough students from either North or South America for even a continental booth. We made friendship bracelets and helped kids (and the occasional adult) make cute crafty stand up Christmas trees, and to decorate them. The even was fun, but also very draining. There are a few photos by one of my classmates at the end of this post.

Some other recent events include a low-key birthday party for a friend’s boyfriend, the cooking of a magical miracle leftover collage improv dish (tasted great, but shouldn’t have), Trivia Night (my team actually won second, shockingly enough), an adventure to rival Lord of the Rings where we walked for 10 km in a few hours in search of a restaurant that was open, a brief but enjoyable trip to a nearby Zen Buddhist temple, a brief skype encounter with family in the low country, and the grand rearranging of my bedroom furniture. Well, and as always a ton of school. I wrote my Japanese final presentation on the Appalachian Mountains. ♥  I went to Tokyo this past weekend for a belated Thanksgiving dinner, and had an amazing and fulfilling time.  It was quite an event, and deserves a post all its own. I’ll get on that soon when I have time.

photo by Bobby Liang

photo by Bobby Liang

photo by Bobby Liang

And that’s all for now, folks. またね。

I used to not really care for Thanksgiving.  I mean, it was always just an “okay” holiday for me, never my favorite by a longshot.  As the years have gone on, Thanksgiving has really grown on me.  I now really enjoy Thanksgiving…mostly because I love spending 4 long days holed up at my parents’ house, eating tons of food and doing whatever. 

As much as I like Thanksgiving, there are a few Thanksgivings that really stick out  as being totally primo.  Here we go…

Thanksgiving, 1994
  I had hip reconstrutive surgery during the fall of my juinor year of high school.  Liz’s and my doctor, Dr. Kopits, worked out of St. Joseph’s hospital in Towson, Maryland, just outside of Baltimore.  I had to be out there during the Thanksgiving week for physical therapy.
  My family all came in to join my mom and me, and we decided to drive to New York to catch the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade.  They sprung me from the hospital before the sun came up and off we were, barrelling down the highway towards the bright lights of the big city.
  We got there and got a great spot for parade watching.  We all had an amazing time, and after the parade ended, we spent the day sightseeing capped off by a Thanksgiving feast at a local IHOP.  Certainly a very memorable Thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving, 2003
  Joe was living in Bristol, England and I was living in Dublin, Ireland, both of us going to graduate school.  Neither of us had been home or seen the rest of our family, and we were eagerly awaiting for Thanksgiving. 
  Liz and a few of our friends - McNally & Palmer – came over to stay with me for a few days before we headed off to Bristol for the holiday.  I had a great time showing them around my adopted city and introducing them to my new friends.
  On that Thursday, I ditched my afternoon lecture so that we could hop on a plane to Bristol, where Joe, Caroline and my parents were waiting, a deliciously smuggled-into-the-country turkey breast cooking away in the tiny oven. 
  We ate like champions, drank like it was going out of style – we even bought one of those HUGE bottles of Asti sparkling wine – and watched “Rosemary’s Baby”.  The next day we got up and took a train into Paddington Station in London and spent the next few days playing super tourists. 

Thanksgiving, 2004
  I was down to my last 5 weeks of living in Dublin, and my whole family was getting together to celebrate Thanksgiving in Paris.  Before the big meet-up, my folks came to spend a few days with me in Dublin, and we had a great time.  We did some shopping, some sightseeing, all kinds of fun stuff.
  Then we flew to Paris.  And Joe & Caroline took the Chunnel.  And Matt, Eileen, McNally & Liz flew in from Chicago.  And My godmother flew in from New York.  And Meggles flew in from Limerick.  And we had an incredible 3 days. 
  We ate “Thanksgiving” dinner at a restaurant where no one supposedly spoke English (we still think they were just messing with us) and ate fantastic, authentic French food.  We hit the Louvre, the Museum D’Orsay, the Rodin Museum, the Latin Quarter, the Latin Market, and so on and so on. 
  A weekend that we still talk about as being one of the best.  And when it was over, we all got on our separate modes of transport and scattered back around the globe.

Thanksgiving, 2009
  My dad got it in his head that we should volunteer for the Chicago Thanksgiving Day parade. 
  And so, this year, we did.
  And we got to be on National TV.
  And, despite all of the complaining and all of the standing around for almost 2 hours in the sleet and rain and dark and cold, it was actually a VERY fun time.

Many, many things I have to be thankful for…

On Wednesday we spent 14 hours driving to Philadelphia, where we proceeded to eat a lot in the name of patriotism and freedom. In the glorious tradition of Thanksgiving, we spent Thursday morning cooking and then we stuffed ourselves silly at 3 in the afternoon. To be fair, I actually didn’t do much cooking. While our hosts cooked turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, sweet potatoes, cranberry sauce, a pumpkin pie, and an apple pie, I lounged around on the couch and called all of my family members. “Family First” is my motto – especially when it means that I don’t have to cook. Our hosts seemed to have a lot of fun in the kitchen, though, and fun is really what it’s all about. If anything, I did them a favor by letting them brine and cook the turkey by themselves.

We had quite the Thanksgiving spread. I think Martha Stewart would have been proud, but I don’t know for sure because she refuses to answer my phone calls, e-mails, and text messages. Maybe she’s just a jerk with no Thanksgiving spirit after all. Prison has made her bitter and calloused.

The Death’s Head/Sickly Child contribution to dinner was a lot of butter masquerading as green been casserole. It was delicious for a few bites, and then we avoided it for the rest of the weekend because the mere thought of that much butter made us all nauseous. DH accepts full responsibility for the green bean casserole fiasco. Despite our contribution, dinner was a success, as evidenced by DH immediately falling asleep on the couch afterwards from the sheer satisfaction/pain of it all. When we finally roused him from his Thanksgiving stupor, we headed out for a walk, during which we groaned about our bellies hurting and being full. It was extremely cliché.

We walked along the path at Wissahickon Valley Park, and despite our stomach aches, the smell of horse poo, and the freakishly short benches that lined the walking path, it was a lovely stroll, and a great way to appease our guilty consciences for being such gluttons.

And just when we stopped feeling bloated and gross, we went home and ate two different kinds of pie – both prepared with love and care by The Mean Sister. Again, most of the awesome things at this Thanksgiving feast were not our brainchildren.

If I had the chance to do it over again, I would do it all the same – disgustingly rich green bean casserole and all. Okay, maybe one fewer stick of butter in the casserole, and it would have been perfecto. Our sincere thanks to the Mean Sister and That Guy for cooking for us and putting up with us. We love you guys, but would probably never say that to your faces because of our commitment to our “tough guy” personas. Thanks for putting up with us for four days!

For the last three weeks of Studio class, Ellen has asked us to design a Brand Bible for the product we came up with at the weekend Visiting Artist Workshop with Designer/Art Director Peter Buchanan-Smith. My Brand Book will be for my product, KYT: Keys You Trust. KYT shifts the commonplace key from it’s mundane existence into an object of compelling personal value.

Keys are an important part of our lives. It’s something you carry with you every single day and your set of keys can be like a snapshot of who you are and how you live your life. Each one protects yet allows access into the lifelines of our world. A key is much more than just a copy—that tiny piece of metal if often what gets you home every single day.

As it stands now, getting a key looks like walking into a Home Depot and handing over your key to an indifferent employee of the big box store. They hand back a flimsy sheet metal copy of your very personal keys. If you’re lucky, they’ll even put it into a small manila envelope for you. If you really want to get crazy you can pick from the dazzingly ugly array of keys covered in smiley faces and zebra print.

With my KYT Brand Book I intend to convey an aura of personal experiences, good taste and excellent craft. Stay tuned.

This year IARc’s Graduate School had a record enrollment of students. Due to the high number of attending graduate students, the diversity of the projects also has had an impact in IARc. Projects range from several product designs to museum exhibit development to historic preservation. For several months graduate students researched and developed a topic of interest for their field of study. All projects are unique, and the grad students have kindly shared their theory, process and development with us. The following three graduate students concentrate their projects around museum design, and building preservation.

[Ashley Boycher] The Hatchery: An Exhibition-Retail Collaborative

The Hatchery grew from a business proposal by a faculty member of the business school, Joe Erba, his vision is to create a space to exhibit and sell student work exclusively. The Hatchery would accommodate visual art, performance art, and design work form various creative departments on campus including art, interior architecture, creative writing, consumer and retail studies, dance , music, broadcasting, cinema and theater. The project intends to foster community while cultivating talent and encouraging cross-discipline collaboration to bridge gaps within the university and between the university and the city. The following images are of the graphic Ashley created to brand The Hatchery and following are a few precedence studies.

[Katy Brandt] Reinterpreting the Manufactured Home Archetype

Project theory and description. Project image courtesy of Katy Brandt.

Sketches and project development. Project image courtesy of Katy Brandt.

Individual parts. Project image courtesy of Katy Brandt.

Interior perspective. Project image courtesy of Katy Brandt.

[Vanessa Morehead]

In 1958 Lowenstein began teaching an innovative course in architectural design at NC Woman’s College (now UNC-Greensboro). Twenty-three female students designed a house, oversaw its construction and decorated the resulting structure, dubbed the “Commencement House” by the university’s public relations office. Through the use of exposed brick, wood and glass the interior design is integrated with the structural elements and exterior finishes. The free, spacious atmosphere is reinforced by use of a basic soft grayed green throughout the house. Accents colors offer vitality and interest as did accessories with the use of textured finishes such as grass cloth, wood, glass, plastic, cement and brick. The interiors were planned to create the largest space possible within a budget accommodate living requirements with a minimum of visual dividers. Family needs for privacy were handled without the loss of open areas required for general living purpose and entertainment. Glass walls in the master bedroom and living room overlook the garden from a generous balcony as a defining feature. The dining and family areas also employed glass walls that merge the indoor and outdoor spaces. Vanessa Morehead for her design will renovate the Commencement House into a faculty retreat house. The base of her theory for this design is based on Brooker and Stone definition of Intervention from their book rereading’s, Intervention is a procedure that activates the potential or repre sd meaning of a specific place. It only truly works when the architectural response of the modifications draw all their cues from the existing building. The designer will regard the building as a narrative, a story to be discovered and retold and through a process of uncovering clarification and interpretation will reveal and reactivate the place.

The original building provides the momentum for change; the designer’s localize and highly specific reading of the place will dictate the appropriate moves. In order to impose a degree of control or order, the building may need to be simplified, thus produce a new way of looking at or understanding it. The analysis and reading of the original building can often be destructive as it is constructive; the designer will strip away, remove, clarify, and undo in order to reveal new or hidden meanings.

Site. Images courtesy of Vanessa Morehead.

Current patio status of "The Commencement" House.

Current status of interior living room.

Proposed exterior development.

Proposed interior dining development.

We have arrived. This is it. Today is the day. My 23rd birthday is here. And so ends Twenty-Three. Before I begin my final post, I would like to thank anyone and everyone who has read this blog or this series. I understand that this, by and large, has not been the greatest quality, and I am certainly not deluded enough to believe that anyone gives a shit about what I have to say. I also owe a great deal of thanks to four people primarily: Pepsibones Krueger for doing a large part to inspire the series, and for periodic pep-talks throughout that gave me perspective and kept me going. Katiri Willaum for doing her part to get me blogging again, period, and for taking a continual interest in what was to come in Twenty-Three. Rachael Hayes for saving my ass with the last minute guest write and (likely) bringing a few more readers with it. Derek Sosnowski for putting up with over a month of Twenty-Three being the only subject that passed through my lips, for fielding phone calls to make sure my subject matter wasn’t ridiculous every afternoon, and for never judging the process.

Final Twenty-Three post commencing now:

I’m not sure if anyone has noticed, but 2009 has sucked pretty royally from about every angle. Where The Wild Things Are lived up to the hype and I thought it was great, but I’ve only seen it once and that opinion could be changed (or affirmed). Same goes for Coraline. Parks and Recreation started this year and I’ve thoroughly enjoyed that, along with Modern Family and The Middle. But, Twenty-Three isn’t the place to discuss such new things. Everything I’ve put in so far has been, somehow, tried and true. Has at least some kind of longevity behind it, proving that it doesn’t suck or isn’t about to start sucking.

So, perhaps because of my mood, I’m going to close out Twenty-Three with a reminder that this year has been bogus.

Aside from the few things I mentioned, I can’t think of anything good that happened with any media. Nothing was released or produced or started that seems to be worth writing about. Instead, we lived through the worst economic downturn in decades, watched the government give unrestricted bail-outs to companies that failed primarily because of a lack of ethics, had to hear about things like “Car Czars”, witnessed “Cash for Clunkers”, and thousands upon thousands of us lost our homes and jobs.

Oh, and there was still an unjustified war going on.

Doesn’t really matter what else happened. That sucked.

As a member of the class of 2009, I graduated into that bullshit. And, the majority of my friends are unemployed or under employed. If I’m not mistaken, the unemployment rate, when variables like the under employed and discouraged workers are factored in, is close to 20%. That rate is higher for my age bracket. They say that graduating into a recession hurts your earnings over your lifetime significantly compared with those who don’t. 2009 sucked.

Of course, that is a community based view of 2009 that leads me to believe that it sucked. The sucking doesn’t end there. If you know me, and many of you do, you know that 2009 sucked pretty hardcore on a personal level for me. One shit storm after another. Even at this very moment, 2009 is sucking the life out of me. Obviously, today is my birthday (!!!), and I’m hoping for some sort of fresh start. A chance to start 2010 a month early and have things stop sucking.

To be fair, just like 2009 has had a couple of good movies and television shows, 2009 hasn’t been without good moments for me. I graduated from college, I was accepted to the graduate school of my choice, and in spite of the terrible job market that I noted, I managed to land myself a ridiculously sweet gig about 10 days after I decided that I should try actually looking for a job. (Well, if you consider a sweet gig something that involves a future serial killer telling you that he’s going to cut you up and eat you for lunch). I’m also very thankful for a handful of  ridiculously great friends who have stood by me through the bullshit.

I think 2009 will go on the record books as one of those years like the bullshit early 1930s when everything sucked and bread cost twelve million dollars.

2009 sucked.

But that’s okay, because it’s that much more likely that 2010 will be significantly better as a result.

Thank you, for reading. Don’t forget that ps: you’re not dying will exist post Twenty-Three and watch out for Twenty-Four next year.

So, it’s been a while since I’ve posted on this blog. It has been busy since about May, since we got engaged. It’s been an interesting dynamic trying to plan this wedding. I feel like I need to make sure that I retitle this blog tales of a wannabe bride because in the end that’s what this is becoming. I’m tall and proud when it comes to my family, and his family dynamic is well….really different.
It’s largely because they have different priorities. They prioritize everything over family and it’s one of those things that I just can’t seem to get past. Its work over family. I’m just not used to it. Guess it’s something that just kind of happens a lot. But, wedding planning is progressing nicely, we’re working on getting bridesmaids dresses done, tuxes are chosen, I have a dress, a caterer, a reception hall, photographer, and a church. Now, I’ve got to pick a DJ, flowers, cake, you know it never ends.
Then of course there’s school. With the wedding approaching a lot quicker than I would like it too, I must admit that it’s an easy distraction. But, I’m not doing nearly as well as I should be doing largely because I’m distracted, busy, and well, busy. I feel like to a certain extent I’m doing too much and I need to sit down and pay attention, aka why I haven’t been writing this blog nearly as much as I should.
Thanksgiving was nice, and we hit the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in Cleveland. It was a fun trip and that museum is way too much to see in one day. The interactive displays alone would take one day. U23D was out of this world and made me feel better for missing their show this year in DC. Bruce Springsteen had 2 entire floors, with the history and dynamic of rock and roll taking up a good entire basement of the pyramid building nestled right behind the Science Center and next to the new Browns Stadium.
Its cold up here in them there hills, a lot different than it is in Maryland where I’ll admit, we’re still waiting for winter to come. I’m happy to keep waiting so take that for what it is. I’m going to end up getting parking for the winter, it might not be worth the price, but if it will save me the trouble when the ice sets in, I’ll be happy.
It’s an interesting change from when I used to post all the time. I think I was trying to avoid the pain of real life and the true reality that my sweetheart isn’t here, and until I finish this PhD, he won’t be. We’re not likely to stay in the DC area, and that although depressing will be an interesting and dynamic change. For the both of us. He’s got a much harder road to hoe than I do for a full time position, so I guess it all just depends on how you want to deal with things. I’m dealing with rough stuff now he’ll be dealing with it later.
Ah well, flights boarding. Guess I need to get going. I’ll try my best to stay updated. I’ve been really bad with it recently because things are so busy and I’ll admit that NaBloPoMo basically passed with me not missing it too much. Guess times change.

I am at a crossroads these days. In my final semester as an undergraduate. I remember the day I went to register for my freshman semester. I asked about the education program the school offered. There is a school of education at Hunter, QUEST. I didn’t even attempt to apply, for two reasons. After the first semester (of which I had a pretty awesome, for my standards GPA) you need to compete to get in. I don’t compete in something I really want, if I think I may fail. And the other candidates were more serious about getting into the élite education program than I was. The second reason I didn’t apply was because the school didn’t offer Early Childhood Education, which was the field I was interested in. I reasoned, that I could study whatever I wanted as an undergraduate and then get my Masters in Education.

On my way through college I officially (by the registrar) changed my major a few times. First, I declared English with a concentration in Creative Writing as my major. I took an introduction to creative writing class did awesome (by anyones standards) and figured I had what it takes. Then I took a fiction writing class and my dreams were shot to hell. I was very capable of making my life sound pretty and interesting, but not so good at creating a story about other people. I looked at my credits and realized without going backwards I could change my concentration from creative writing to Language Arts. Language Arts is mostly a second major for the School of Education students, but some were just people who like english a bit, but not enough to commit to the Comparative Literature or Creative Writing concentrations (which were full of Literature classes I hated).

In the meantime, I was taking a few Psychology classes and a sociology class and fell in love with both subjects. But scheduling made me choose only one to make my minor. I chose the former. There was a difference between the psychology classes and the english classes. The psychology classes was science based, but also included discussions and interesting observations about human nature. The English classes were free-for-all. Anything anyone said was never considered incorrect. Literature professors, were apparently taught to never outright correct a student. I liked always being right, but the Psychology classes were getting to me and my fear of certain math classes (requirements for the psychology major) were dissipating with each English class’ affirmation of my knowledge. [As unrelated as the two are, they made me feel smart.]

And then last fall, I had to take a class called, ‘Theory and Practice of Expository Writing’ to satisfy an English major requirement. It was basically a class that everyone should take that teaches more in-depth writing skills, especially for research purposes. I had an amazing professor. She often gave little quizzes on the reading, there were a ton of assignments, big and small, but I loved going to that class. The quizzes brought my grade up significantly and forced me to read the assigned homework. The major writing assignments had us thinking about concepts and topics that interested us and her feedback was immensely helpful.

I wrote my final paper on a comparison between two teaching methods for children on the Autism spectrum. I changed my major to Psychology right away. Now I had to add two  full semesters and one summer session to my college career, but it was worth it. I would have graduated this past June with no clue what I want to do, and no real world equivalent to a BA in ELA (and a Psychology minor).

I still don’t know what I want to do next. I still have this fear of certain subjects (think hard sciences) but I know two things; I want to work with children, and I want to love my job more than hate it. I see so many people who just work for the paycheck, and they are miserable. And then I see people who work because they love their jobs (Some do well and some struggle, but at least they love what they’re doing.)

So here I am, a few days away from registering for my final semester, not sure what I’m doing afterwards. And it’s not like I can just go and apply to graduate programs willy-nilly. If I lose interest in something I will give up, stop trying and I would definitely not hide the fact that I’m bored or miserable.

Since over the past few months I have become an active Blogger it has come to my attention that many people who read my entries are under the misconception that I am a writer. While I completely understand why people would make this assumption, since under the most liberal of definitions a kind person would consider my Blog to be actual substantive writing, I don’t really consider myself to be a writer.

This is probably partially due to the fact that I am exceedingly hard on myself, although you would probably treat your subconscious in a similar manner if you read some of the works that have been published by the real writer in my family, my sister Sarah.

Even though she is now in graduate school at Boston College, where she is tirelessly working to gain her advanced degree in Higher Education Administration, she still recently wrote a piece that was published in her old college newspaper.

During my sister’s 4-year career at Bradley University she quickly rose through the ranks at “The Scout” (BU’s campus paper) and became Editor in Chief for her senior year. My Dad used to email me her articles that were published in the paper and I always enjoyed reading them for their content and ideas.

While I always felt that she was a talented writer, and that her pieces were very well composed, it wasn’t until I read her recent work that I truly recognized the full scope of her literary abilities. The article talked about her experiences as a graduate student in Boston, and how she is seeing a different side of education and the educational process through one of her jobs advising student organizations.

She does a wonderful job in the article of contrasting her Bradley and Boston College experiences, as well as offering tremendous personal introspection on her feelings and struggles during her transition from school in Peoria to Boston.

It was after reading and digesting the message of her article that I began comparing her writing style to my own, since the composition and content of her work was very similar to a Blog that I might write.

After going over the piece a second time I was further impressed with how seemingly every thought flowed together even though her sentences were jam-packed with ideas, and all of her descriptions were crystal clear and well articulated.

My sister would probably react modestly to such praise about her writing because that’s how she’s always responded in the past, which is why I am taking this opportunity to compliment her in a more public forum.

The best way that I know how to do this is to encourage all of my readers to check out my sister’s latest published work at this link:

http://explore.bradley.edu/journalsfromtheroad/trips/2009/onward/

I promise you that after reading her article you will not only be impressed by her work, but also realize why she is the one true writer in our family.

Happy thanksgiving weekend everyone!

This year I am especially thankful for a spontaneous life, an amazing, fun, talented, and supportive family and community of friends, the privilege to join the vibrant Fletcher community and work towards a graduate degree in Law and Diplomacy, and last but not least, the most delicious, nutritious thanksgiving meal ever, falling just behind my mom’s annual spread.

Shout out to Baby Ace for partying like a rockstar on his first thanksgiving on earth with mom, dad, and the “R Street Hunnies Family Night Crew”!

Back in Boston the weather’s chilly and rainy, and starting to feel more like winter.  Thought I’d share some fall foliage and fun snapshots before the snow starts to stick.

The first few are from an annual fall festival called Honk!Fest – groups of “activist bands” – mostly horns, playing in the squares all weekend and marching from Davis Square through Somerville to Harvard Square in Cambridge on a gorgeous fall day in October.

Honk!fest comes to Somerville!

Each year Honk!festers set the Davis neighborhood afire with their shiny, bold brass and the sounds of horns honking throughout the streets.  I spent one perfect fall day off the grad school grid to follow the Honk! festival, enjoying the May Day -esque celebration, watching parade of political puppetry and listening to the activist brass bands.

Stick it to me baby: Health Care!

Carrying the dead

Funky Brass-town

Get it girl!

Kanye West Makes Appearance at Honk!Fest

Just what the doctor ordered!

Brazilian Style Drum Jam

One Example of Brilliance at Tufts

Lately I have been feeling very down about grad school applications. I just have this doomed feeling — I just keep thinking “I am not going to get in.” I feel like there is something about me that is designed to make me fail at grad school applications, and I hope I can blame it on genetics.

So, I have been feeling totally incompetent and I finally caught a break today — and that break is simply knowing that I am not the only idot in the world. Today I read in my blog stats that someone has viewed my blog because they searched the terms “personal history statement gay.” I feel better knowing that someone out there is wondering how to write a personal statement and how to actually sound like a good, interesting, intelligent, and diverse candidate (when really they are as lost and generic as I am).

Thank god for blog stats and google trends — proof that there are so many idiots, I am not alone.

Panza verde is the nickname given to Antigüeños in Guatemala. They are said to have green bellies from eating so many avocados. After my undergraduate schooling, I spent two years living in Guatemala, teaching preschool and learning Spanish. I returned in September 2009 (although I have been back for short visits a few times since then). I have created this blog to document my next adventure, a two-week educational tour of Havana, Cuba. The main goal of the trip is to learn about Cuba’s educational system. Additionally, I’m looking forward to some great food, great architecture, and great company.

Paz.

Aguacate