or: How’s he doing so far?

I have been putting off this piece for a while because I have wanted to hold off criticism until President Obama reached either a key decision or his one year mark, whichever came first. Unlike many of my opposing party opponents I have fought hard to reserve judgment, giving Obama a chance to begin to get his head around the true scope of all of the issues that faced his administration from day one. Sadly we have come to the ‘key decision’ moment as of Tuesday with the troop surge in Afghanistan, and now I feel we can rightfully look back at his track record and begin to cast a vote, as a supporter, on what direction I feel that we are moving in; at this point we can now piece together the puzzle of what Obama may intend with his administration, and the manner in which he is coming to, and executing, the courses of action his administration is enacting. From the controversial ‘public option’ and flawed ‘cash for clunkers’ program, to his ‘Bush Doctrine’ surge approach in Afghanistan, and doomed-from-the-start decision to bail out car makers and to a lesser extent the lending and banking market, Obama seems to be garnering little favor within his own party, across the aisles, or in the public sector, with every decision he makes.

Barack Obama basically campaigned on the same platform that every party opposing the presiding party does, more change and less of the same. There was nothing very different in his campaign than any other candidate may have spoken of. What set Obama apart was his rhetoric about transparency, ending the war, and better living conditions in America for the middle class. He spoke of lowering taxes, saving the economy, putting people back in to jobs and ending the kind of things we had become accustomed to under Bush. One of the biggest things, to me, was his willingness for open debate before massive bills were set in motion; periods of time where the public could weigh in and really get a sense of what was going on. Many of these things, and of the myriad of others, have either failed to come to fruition or are stalled in action.

First I want to address one situation where he seemed to have the best of intentions and caused a firestorm of controversy, the “cash for clunkers program.” It seemed innocent enough, give Americans a credit for a new car if they brought in an old vehicle that was less safe and fuel efficient than what was on the market today. This was seemingly a great concept, an innocuous situation for Americans to upgrade to a new car. The idea was two-fold, get older, fuel inefficient cars off the road, improving emissions, and to give the car market, which was floundering, a much needed boost. I think it was more than two fold though in the down side. What it did was get a lot of cheap cars, that could have been paid for in cash for people or young drivers to have as first or alternative cars. Then it also got a lot of people deeper in to debt taking on a car payment that they might not really be able to afford, and certainly did not have before, further straining the budget of Americans. Lastly it had one last, unforeseen outcome, the most popular car sold as a cause of the program…Toyotas.

The program had good intentions, a program to improve safety and emissions while boosting the economy, which is not a bad idea. The result of putting struggling Americans deeper in to debt for something they truly did not need by dangling an irresistible deal in front of them seems to really further corner us in to difficult debt to income ratios. This coupled with the job market continuing to fail, after the program closed, has probably resulted in a lot of missed payments and repossessions crushing many of the people that thought they were getting a great deal, blinded by 4,500 bucks. The program was wildly popular, almost too popular, and resulted in great criticism of its planning and execution, but it never exceeded the approved funds Obama requested, only the initial investment after it went too well. As we will see, this lack of thought of the repercussions of his ideas in how they affect the middle-class American long term is symptomatic of a slight disconnection in what we really need, not what he thinks we want.

One of the largest decisions, and one of the first, was the all-too-unclear bailout program to keep large industry and banking afloat in a terrible economic crisis. This is a massive, complicated, and unfinished issue with a long time to go before we can really judge the effects. This spending is still going on with more money to go out, industries just starting to see the effect it has had, and so many ways of looking at it my head spins just trying to tackle the lot of the issues. As complicated as it is, I think there are a few clear facts I can sift through. We have, to date, spent about 3 trillion dollars, total, according to CNNMoney.com, 73 billion of which has been paid back. This 3 trillion is only part of the total 11 trillion that was approved, but so far the repayment has only been about 2.4% of what we shelled out.

I did not want to go in to the private sector and buy up GM, did not support it one bit. I think that the government should not really own, with my tax dollars, any assets of a private corporation that has failed to compete with a good business plan. I know this is controversial, but getting bailed out only keeps bad companies afloat where new ideas, business models, and smarter men and women could step up and run things right. You cannot give money to a failing company and expect the same people who ran it in to the ground to make better choices. This is the definition of insanity, to do the same thing repeatedly and expect a different outcome. Even despite our best efforts companies still claimed bankruptcy! So we threw money at them, and wouldn’t you know it, failing companies that were making bad decisions made more bad decisions; gee wilickers.

I can kind of see the need to bailout car makers, they are a huge part of the American economy and employ tens of thousands of Americans on living wage salaries, so to let them fail would put a lot of people on the street quickly. So I see the move to give them operating capital to absorb toxic assets and market share losses. Where the bailouts lost me was capitalizing the likes of AIG and Fannie Mae directly without providing relief to the people that were struggling to pay these people off. I agree completely with an idea Jon Stewart mentioned on more than one occasion, to send those funds to the people who could then give it to the companies. Look, if I got a check for $15,000, you bet your ass I was sending 90% of that to those people I owed money to. I would pay off every credit card and cut huge chunk out of the principle balance on my student loans. As a result I have felt relief on my monthly expenses, cut down on my debt to income ratio, and the lenders got their money anyway. In this scenario everyone wins, not just the industry, but the people who needed it. As it stands I am still crazy in debt, the economy is still struggling, and no one has won.

The other concept I liked with the likes of paying off the banks and helping the American people in the process would be for the government to have taken that money they provided with the condition that the funds be spread out across the board at 10% of the principle balance on every loan or credit card. The money now goes directly to the company and I still feel the relief. My monthly payments go down, the industry now has liquid assets again, and we all win in this scenario as well. Obama didn’t need to send every American a check, but the effects of that money, those billions and trillions that have gone out to support the companies should have had a direct effect on those that fuel the economy, the people. The amount of money I owed, my monthly payments, or my debts completely should have disappeared when, now, not only my payments were going to the lenders, but my taxes I paid the government, were going to the lenders. I was double and triple paying Fannie Mae! This is symptomatic of a much greater issue this country’s people face, industry trumps people. The government is quick to support the industry, to keep the machine going, without any of the effects or cash going directly to us, the Americans who work to make this country move, those of us that are working and are paying taxes.

So here we are coming to the economy as a whole, something I won’t even begin to try and dissect in any manner other than philosophically. To be honest I really don’t get the minutia that comes with being an economist, so I am not one, but I do think that I can speak on some ideals we seem to hold to, despite the failing efforts they produce every day. The stance I take is that there needs to be some form of regulation, especially with the money we poured in to it, and the companies that got are money, we get to decide how it gets spent. I am disgusted at the news of massive bonuses with my tax dollars, you failed you blood sucking bastards, I was taught that bonuses are for successes, and you have had NONE! I also think that a free market can be only so free before corruption and greed cloud the eyes of everyone in it. Investors, quick money guys, and those that ignored the signs of failure and denied that growth would end, should not be allowed to continue to work without severe regulation and oversight to secure that it does not happen again.

As far as I can tell the money these people have gotten has been abused, misspent, and in some cases has disappeared without explanation. To the limit of my understanding the market is getting better, but a lot of industries are still slowing drowning or are gaining little ground on where we once stood as a relatively stable country. The President just started handing out blank checks without many, or any strings. When you give a ‘loan’ like this with money that isn’t yours to people that fucked the real earners of said money, you had better have a ton of strings. You cannot leave these screw ups to their own devices as you have given them a get out of jail free card; there is going to be the same orgy of misuse and BS that got them to the point they needed my, our, help. Regulation in the free market is necessary. When you take your dog out in public you have to put them on a leash because it is for their safety if they get too excited and dart in to traffic, and the safety of others as they may end up incidentally or accidentally hurting someone. This is simple civic responsibility and this kind of basic regulation, even those 20 foot retractable leashes, is necessary for the free market big dog to avoid horrible tragedies as the one we are trying to overcome.

Health care reform was a massive platform Obama spoke from. He wanted affordable health insurance for all Americans. This is quite vague but it is basically what he campaigned on. However, the reform he is putting forward is far from what he promised, intended, or will even get, as this thing makes its way to a vote. There are many items that he should have included, he said would be included, but has failed to come through on. One of the major items he campaigned on was passing the Freedom of Choice Act, the lack of reproductive health care at the ‘heart’ of the act, and among many others the importing of prescription drugs and a list of items pertaining to the elderly and those on Medicare, all of which aren’t in there. What he has put forth, as far as I can tell, is such a watered down version of what he promised that it barely resembles what he set out to get, and it still won’t garner enough support to pass. With this bill he has failed to address a lot of key issues, the debate of the insurance companies failing upon passing, the ridiculous ‘death panel’ phrase which is total bunk, and the idea of rationed care and killing your grandmother have made this an outlandish cartoon despite the fact that it is not nearly as partisan as he would like.

So many issues in relation to health care and insurance companies stems from people’s fears. I think they are largely unfounded and apocalyptic at best. Far too many think that the public option is anything but an option, as if setting this forth would force people to take the health care. His optional plan is just that, an option, you do not have to use this health care. Private industry will be just fine, if it were to pass, simply based on the fact competition is good for the marketplace; this is the sole reason the free market works as it does. If there was no competition there would be a monopoly by one company, and a monopoly is bad for consumers since they can do what they want and you have no choice but to take it. Competition drives down prices and improves services and goods because they are fighting for your business. Do you think insurance companies operate in a way different from this model? They fight for your business just as hard as any TV maker fights to sell you the best product at the cheapest price. It is in the interest of survival of a company where the customer wins.

Where does this fear come from? Well it may come from news outlets sensationalizing ideas and rumor as they twist small words and phrases in to the death nell for grandma. The news industry is where the average American is going for their info as there are few, if any, Americans that actually sit down and read the health care bill. This breeds ignorance, a lack of fact finding on our own, and what happens is the news outlets feed us what they think we should know, scaring all of us who don’t know any better. This nation is scared, and it is easy to whip us in to a frenzy right now because we are all so ignorant, coupled with a blind trust of our media outlet of choice, that we can be easily imprinted with suggestion. It is not totally the fault of news media, it is also our general ignorance, or warped misinterpretation, of history and true definitions of things like ‘communism’ and ‘fascism’ that let those around us convince us that the ‘public option’ is the linch pin in Obama’s quest to realize Mussolini’s Italy.

I love the idea of health care reform. I don’t have health care, so you can put as many bureaucrats as you want between me and a doctor, as long as I eventually get to see the doctor. I am one of those who need to see a doctor, a dentist, and an oncologist, because I could you a tune up, but I am also one that thinks that there may be another way to get me there than those that are being presented as the clear cut options. My feeling is that we can work within the system we have with some regulation, incentive, subsidizing, and careful analysis that can insure everyone, strengthen competition, and NOT provide a public option (government health care) at all.

My first idea is kind of three fold in that there are multiple items that need to be enacted, and they can be done so incrementally, while still keeping the system relatively unchanged. The first step in my process, let’s call it ‘Plan B’, is to go to insurance companies and decide which policy fits for you as an individual or family. You decide how much coverage you want and with which insurer you want to do business. The caveat is that you must get quotes from three different insurance companies to find the best deal. The legwork on this front is done by the people wanting health insurance just as if they were going to buy it themselves. The second step is done by the government as they determine what your financial assistance needs will be. This can be determined in the same manner as section 8 housing; taking in to account your income, tax bracket, average monthly expenses, assets, credit score, number of dependents, etc. The government decides how much assistance you qualify for; in some cases this amount you qualify for may be more than the policy you want/need, so you may be able to even get better coverage than you shopped for, and for others the short fall of the difference between assistance determined and cost of the policy is then covered by the individual.

What I think Plan B provides is many positive things. Number one, there is no government interference. They simply determine what coverage amount you qualify for and then, if you want more coverage, you cover the difference. It also allows for the consumer to shop the best deal and get whatever coverage they want, in whatever configuration. Thirdly it works within the current system, actually increasing the customer base of insured Americans and therefore making those in the industry richer without cheap government competition. The competition will continue to be between insurance companies, which will benefit consumers with better, cheaper services as the competition for dwindling amounts of new customers gets fierce. Imagine how hard they will fight for the last uninsured American, they’ll give him the moon!

This plan works within the constraints of the current model. It also hinges on Americans that pay their taxes, so illegal immigrants without SS#’s or tax returns can’t get the service, which will please the group of people that fear insuring non-Americans. No one can argue that it does limit government meddling in this sector of the free market, increases insurance company revenue (imagine the stock increases), and provides the American people with assistance as well as the option to get more coverage than the government determines you can be afforded. In all I think it eliminates the public option, the most feared and heated topic of the current bill, and will probably cost the US government less than the current plan, as well as insuring every American on some level. As far as I can tell this might be the best course of action we could take to please everyone.

I do have another option, similar to the last, but definitely different enough to warrant calling it ‘Plan C’. This is the option where the government gives tax breaks and incentives to companies that reach out and provide a service of their own on state levels to insure all Americans. A bit more ambiguous and open to criticism, the government would placate those insurance companies willing to lower premiums and extend a health care plan of their own designed on a sliding scale based on criteria similar to that the government would use in Plan B. So the insurance company determines that you should be able to afford a specific amount, and will credit a portion, or all of it to you, the consumer. If you want further coverage then you can buy it by spending the difference. So if the insurance companies design their own, low income/uninsured plan on a sliding scale/case-by-case basis, then the government will provide them with tax breaks and maybe subsidies on more expensive procedures, in return for taking the initiative to insure all Americans.

There are pros and cons to this one though, that are not present in Plan B. The incentives mentioned hinge on the fact that insurance companies that want these breaks would not be allowed deny coverage or discontinue coverage for anyone…ANYONE. They can no longer break policies or play the little games to deny coverage or drop policies, without government oversight. This means that once insured, if the companies want the incentives, they need to prove that they are humanitarian in nature and will not leave anyone in the lurch for any reason but non-payment. Also, incentives would stipulate that lapsed plans based on non-payment are still effective until 6-straight months of non-payment based on hardship. If someone loses their job then the insurance company covers them for up to six months, allowing a grace period of coverage for a person to get the means to continue paying, and still being covered in the interim in case of incident. In addition it does allow for some fraudulent companies to create loop-hole filled policies for these new customers, but with regulation of the industry I think we can avoid this.

As I said, Plan C is a bit more complicated and malleable as to exactly how ‘need’ is determined, the amount of government oversight, and as to how these plans can be expedited in to existence, but I think it still is better than a government run health care system as it continues to work within the constraints of the current system while insuring many, and with the proper amount of oversight, can keep them insured. Both plans B&C are not without flaws, but if Obama were to present either one I think he would be pleasantly surprised as to the amount of support he may get.

The insurance and prescription drug lobbyists are all too powerful and influential in Washington. I would go as far as to say that they are scary for politicians to cross, even for the good of the people. But if we can convince them to play ball and be the shysters they are while helping the people, then they may not even realize that they are doing a good thing, going along with it given that either plan is more money for them and minimal government interference. Can you even imagine a world where every citizen of the US is insured through a private insurance company? It is total market saturation for the insurance companies, what’s not to love about that Obama? Whatever does come out of the health care reform, it will not be Obama’s vision, or anyone’s for that matter, but I think we can get a lot closer to the idea of ‘every man, woman, and child’ being insured if we work to reform, not overhaul from scratch.

Unlike these past topics that have been addressed in some manner, for good or ill, there is one section of the population that has been largely, if not entirely, ignored, the gay community. Obama during his campaign was a champion of the people and a lot of those people were gay and lesbian. He got massive support and endorsements form the national and local organizations working for gay rights on different issues. To date though, Obama has done nothing for them, except reassure them that change is coming at a dinner they held in Washington, coupled with a rally, some months ago. Obama had, really, three major platforms for the gay community, basically giving them everything they wanted from a ‘rights’ perspective.

Obama said he would repeal the ever fiery policy of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell”. This policy has seen hundreds of gay men and women booted out of the military; some from positions as invaluable as translators in the middle east to men and women on the ground doing the fighting and dying. This policy has undermined the very status of the soldier, fighting for the country and freedoms that they don’t even have, while trying desperately to hide their identity in utter danger for the likes of you and me. Obama also spoke of ‘bullying’ states in to treating same-sex couples with full equality to all of the same rights in family and adoption laws. Basically, every right a heterosexual couple has, which would be a huge step forward for this community and this country. Third major platform was a big one, to repeal the Defense of Marriage Act which opens up all of the same federal rights that heterosexual couples have, to every civil union and legally recognized union in the gay community.

These three things alone would be a great milestones for this country, but taken as a whole, if he accomplished all three of these campaign promises would place the gay community at nearly eye-level and give them an openness and security to truly pursue happiness in this country for the first time in their history. Imagine not being able to marry the person you love, or being able to visit them in the hospital, or being able to adopt a child, or even just be open about who you are at your core. Can you even fathom having to hide a big part of you while you die for the rights of this country, some of which don’t even extend to you? No, you can’t, unless you are gay, and then I am preaching to the fabulous choir. Any one of these items would be great, Obama, just pick one. DADT could end tomorrow, DOMA could be done quickly, and pressure on the states would take time, but repealing DOMA would definitely open up the flood gates at some state levels.

Not one of these has been addressed in any real manner. All of them are ‘stalled’ or ‘not yet rated’ according to Politifact.com; not yet rated means he hasn’t done anything at all to rate on the subject. The White House is not using strong language on the subject, deciding instead to push those decisions ‘down the road’ as the President has ‘a full plate’. Well no shit, he is the president, his plate will forever be full. There will never be a time in any president’s tenure where they will be bored, there is always multiple things to do, multi-tasking is the life’s blood of a presidency. A full plate is no excuse, it would not take much time to draft legislation to repeal these laws and them file them with congress for a vote. The amount of effort is less than the health care legislation and requests of fund for bailouts. In comparison these little things are weekend projects, there is little to do. Hell, we’re not even writing new laws, we’re just erasing old ones, it could not be simpler, and yet nothing is done. Good luck getting re-elected if nothing is done on the front of gay rights before your next campaign.

One area where I think Obama has shined is reaching out to the world and repairing bridges to create at least the illusion that we again want to work to create a better world over all. Obama has visited more foreign leaders and countries than any other president in history in his first nine months in office. His missions of good will and garnering friendship throughout the world are a testament to his willingness to create a stronger America through diplomacy and shared interests. Now I don’t care how low he bows or what you may criticize are his follies in these visits, he has yet to throw up on anyone, and he has spoken of creating lasting relationships and even human rights in places like China. Obama has done a great deal to show his appreciation for international foreign policy, and he has to, we owe a lot of people a lot of money, especially the aforementioned China. Our debt to other countries as they have financed much of the work we have done to repair this nation and fund our wars has garnered a need for him to travel and sit face to face with the people we owe billions to. So as much as his visits are of good will, they are really for selfish reasons of working with nations to whom we owe a favor and a deepening debt.

Though these trips have an ulterior motive in them more often than not, his work with the UN and other international agencies is not without merit. His trip to Copenhagen was much for the pledge to limit emissions, and he has spoken on more than one occasion against nuclear programs in hostile countries as well as measured criticisms of bunk elections and human rights violations. Obama has done more to be vocal on an international level than many before him, which is both a blessing and a curse. One could argue that he is simply trying to garner favor in lieu of actually doing anything specific. He is out there, jet setting the globe, to position himself to be Andy Taylor in Mayberry as he works to squash terrorism. Really, in essence it may be a simple rebranding of the same agenda, he seems to be trying to get support on being such a ‘good’ guy. But I feel it is more a genuine hope that as we meet and understand one another, a face to face promise or meeting gets him a support on subjects that may earn him a sneer and hesitation if he were less accessible, and this seems to be part of the legacy he wants to leave; a President of the US in service to not only his country, but those that agree to conditional help in times of crisis.

This brings us right to the reason for this piece, the heart of the matter as it were when I began writing this thing three hours ago, Afghanistan. Now I have refrained, to date, from writing even a single piece on the war in Iraq and Afghanistan because I feel it is for far greater minds than mine to contend with. I feel that in my short life of 25 years I have neither the experience to draw on, or the scope of first hands accounts of watching a war unfold, to truly speak as even a moderate authority on the subject of our current predicament. Though I research, read, and watch documentaries, on many conflicts and scandals of the past, I feel that my opinion is that of a true idiot savant and is taken with nary a grain of sand. I do, however, feel that this damn incursion in the middle east has gone on long enough, and the situation we are in is our fault in the first place, so we do have some responsibility for cleaning it up; but it simply is not that simple.

I tire of writing this piece, it has gone on too long and has covered far too many subjects, but I need to press on as we are now getting to the most important part, the climax, as it were. There are two major, driving forces that have led us to the quagmire we find ourselves in at the moment. I won’t go over how we got here from day one at 9/11, it has been milled through far too much already. The basic cause was a thirst for blood, we were offended by the audacity of the attack and we wanted revenge. Revenge is no way to start a war…wait, I said I wouldn’t do this, so I’m not. The first driving force is that we will never win. There, I said it, so let it sink in. Not only will we never win, but we can’t ever win. We are fighting religious zealotry with diplomatic and military force, one does not connect to the other. You cannot eliminate terrorism that is born of a misuse of a religious doctrine unless you eliminate the religion…and that sends us right back to the Inquisition, or worse, the Crusades. That is not our stance after all, we are all about religious freedom, so let’s face the fact that as long as these different peoples exist, and we, the US, exists, they will hate us and plot. It even goes to deeper issues of the holy land, chosen people, racial suppression, as well as a control of regional resources. We can never hope to end the fighting unless we want to just nuke the place and start over, for as long as there are generations being born, there will be those that take things too far.

This is what this is all about anyway, taking things too far. We have been at this thing called the “War on Terror” for eight bloody, intractable years with no end in sight. While I am here, I think I have said this before, but I’m saying it again, you cannot win a war on a ‘noun’. A war on the feeling and weapon of ‘terror’ is like declaring a ‘war on sadness’ or a ‘war on happy’, a losing battle with no clear enemy or foundational strategy. What now, oh yes, the second driving force, it was fucked up when we got here, and we only fucked it up worse every time we’ve left. Think about it. Corrupt Karzai is a man of our making in Afghanistan, and little known fact, we put Saddam Hussein in power! We appointed him, or at least created the situation where he could take power. Follies of this kind on our part, backing the wrong ponies, goes all the way back to Vietnam at least, maybe further, and span the globe.

The middle east, every time we have touched it, is worse off than before we showed up and our activities in, and occupation of, those countries has only fueled anti-american sentiment among the populous. As far back as the Afghan-Russian war, or Kuwait, et al, we have really just messed it up more than need be. Every time it seems we back the wrong horse as well, creating terrible situation that are only different, not better, than the last one. We really owe this region an apology, if it weren’t for all the oil and money in the region we really would never have shown up, but Allah put you on top of our God’s oil, so we gotta get us some. Our meddling has only made things worse, from providing arms, to removing governments, we have made one misstep after another, like we have so often in the past. I would argue that our last great foreign policy decision was crushing the third reich, and we had to level whole countries in the process to do it.

Our involvement overseas is happening, no matter how much screwing up we’ve done, we’re here now, and motives be damned, we need to figure out how to relatively stabilize the region enough so we can get out. Obama’s speech was just like every other president’s war speech, and far too close to Bush’s for my liking. So I’m not gonna break it down, it’s been done, check a website. But I will comment that 30,000 is the exact amount of troops Bush, I mean Cheney, sent to Iraq during the surge. I guess it worked ok, so Obama is doing the same. One good thing is a time table, we cannot afford financially, or through the cost of life, to fight a protracted war so I appreciate a final date. Obama is following through on his campaign promise he made to redirect troops and resources to Afghanistan after he took office. After careful consideration and what seems to be a very measured approach, he is doing so with naysayers on all sides of him.

This is typical, the republicans are criticizing a democratic president when he is doing the same…exact…thing…Bush did, literally down to the number of exactly 30,000 troops, and he still can’t win with these people. I see the wisdom in Obama’s move, let’s get the initial goal accomplished, quell an Al Qaeda uprising in the Pakistani/Afghani border region, give the Afghani government a trained fighting force and a foot hold in their country, and then bring our boys home after beating the bajeezas out of what may be left of the terrorist networks we let get out of hand. I can see this, and I appreciate him trying to get out of Iraq and trying to finish the job in Afghanistan, and I even more greatly appreciate that in his speech he never said the word ‘win’, because we cannot and in all actuality we never would or will, win. This is a losing battle simply based on the fact that kids will grow up to be extremist and we can’t be wiping out generations of kids, so they will be back and better than ever, eventually. Shit, kids own AK-47’s, this mixed with shi’ite/Suni & Jewish/Muslim hatreds are going to breed some seriously badass, bat shit crazy SOB’s. Period. All we can do is kill who is around now and reload for when those kids hit puberty.

I know this seems like a defeatist attitude, but I am simply a realist and the war and bloodshed in that region will continue long after we have left, and gone back in, and left and gone in again, and then probably still be going on after we go in again and limp out one more time. The cycle of violence and hatred will never be broken because the fight is not just between us and the extremists. They declare war on everyone, so they fight amongst one another, against countries, religious peoples, racial groups, etc. They care not for our involvement, if we leave it just means they have more bombs for the markets they would have used on our humvees, so no, I am not optimistic about building a lasting democracy in the middle east. There is simply too much for us to contend with, and even if we kill every single ‘terrorist’ we cannot shoot racism, we cannot bomb prejudice, and we just can’t eliminate the threat of battling for the holy land. I don’t expect you to win Obama, I expect you only to get us out one day, because no republican or democrat can command a military to turn back the clock on more than 2,000 years of blood soaked sand, and it’s not our place to try.

Indeed. Ten pages later and now we are here, together, both exhausted and a little flustered by this spine-jarring journey from one wretched idea to the next. If you are still reading this then I sincerely hope you got something out of it, if not then I am sorry, you just wasted a portion of your life on me and my screed; there are no refunds! It is not my contention here that I know better than Obama, or that I don’t support him, it is simply that I disagree with the execution of certain acts and policies that have had, what I believe, were foreseeable consequences that seemingly no one saw in the planning. This man was given an impossible task with hopes of a large portion of this country weighing heavily on his shoulders even before he took office. In no way do I think he has failed as a President, he has plenty of time to address many more issues and bring this country in a better direction. What is next for America only Obama knows, I think I see a glint in his eye like a half-mad Willy Wonka. At some point he will grab us, tip his hat, give us a topsy spin, and as our heads clear we can look around, at the path we took, and the now-clear genius of every orchestrated step that seems so logical only now that we are in the magical place he knew was our only plausible destination the entire time.

Epilogue:

Then again, if he ruins this country, it’s better than the alternative, and as such I am stating that I would rather be fucked by a young black man than an old white guy. Here’s to you, Obama.

The Duncraft Facebook page referred to this blog on 5 Ways to Winter Bird Watch with Kids which has super suggestions. Check it out!

Daisy and Zeke recently visited Grandma and Grandpa for Thanksgiving. They had a great time visiting and enjoying the larger house to run in, spoiling from Grandpa, and long daily walks with Grandma. They also had turkey and sweet potato Kongs on Thanksgiving and enjoyed grain-free treats from the new dog bakery…

All went well overall, except for Daisy eating Grandma’s chocolate, Zeke’s bully stick, and a muffin. Zeke did really well with the kids, which was also a great relief since he isn’t around them much.

Grandpa spoiling:

Zeke enjoying his “pupcake”:

Daisy enjoying her “pupcake”:

Our holiday/wintry photo shoot:

Visiting with Cousins Wyatt and Maggie:

And here’s our Ruby:

And here’s “mouse vision” as Grandma calls it:

And our handsome, yet anti-social Ricky:

And images from a beautiful, fall day:

Here’s our precious Paco’s grave–may he rest in peace:

Things I’m missing out on because of my job:

-Balanced meals on weekdays-sleep-social life-exercise-time to pamper myself-reading books-stained glass-my garden is suffering-a love life.

I don’t mean to be miss complainer, but my job is hard. It’s a job meant for a single man. If I were to explain what I do it would “sound” really great, and it is kind of great. It’s just that the downfalls of the job are starting to become landslides.

Oh well, Let’s keep it positive!

I have acquired some fabulous new ornaments for our tree this year….peacocks and dragonflies. AND I’m bringing home two Picasso Poinsettias this week!

Yesterday I hit a huge bump while driving and some boxes of Christmas greens fell over in the truck….right on top of some of my Amaryllis. Oops…I get to take one home now

Last weekend I took a last minute trip to Canada to see my new niece, Quinn. Since I’ve left Winnipeg, I’ve never had the slightest desire to move back until now. Yup, blame it on the baby. But I’m sure it also has a little something to do with how crazy up and down my life has been this last year. It just feels safe being back home with my family, like sticking your head in the sand.

The baby is beautiful and I admire and look up to my baby sister for having the balls to be a Mother.

Once again, I’m a blond.

It seemed to get dark earlier today than usual. Of course, the darkness always settled in early in the winter, but today seemed especially gloomy. The clouds were heavy and a small wind whipped up the leaves that had settled on my scruffy little yard.  I sighed. I really didn’t want to make the trip to see Grandma today, but I knew I should. The more I thought about it the guiltier I felt for even considering missing our date. It was a drive of an hour and a half during which I thought a lot about Christmases past.

I always went to Grandma’s house at Christmas time when I was a little girl. It was a tiny house on a cramped lot in a busy city, but I loved it there, mostly because she always brought out a glass dish full of her favorite seasonal treat—ribbon candy. At her house, I could eat all of it I wanted and most days I’d have one sticky piece after another while Grandma and I would play games or cook or bake. Lately, though, it was harder and harder to find the really good thin, authentic ribbon candy shaped in an endless “S” with two or three colors in it. It seemed to be fading out of existence, just like Grandma was doing.

As I drove toward the nursing home, I felt heavy with emotion. This wasn’t her home, not really. This is where residents shuffled themselves through the hallways in their wheel chairs. Sometimes they yelled out or cried piteously. I hated going there, but I was the only grandchild around and no one else was going to visit her. After all, Christmas was a couple of weeks away and I wanted to preserve one of the last vestiges of nostalgia that I could. She wasn’t doing all that well and I wasn’t ready to let go of my grandma of the past, either.

This would be my first Christmas as a single adult in over 20 years and I wasn’t ready for that. My husband had left because he decided he would rather be living with someone else and although my daughters were older, they didn’t like it nor completely understand. So, they grumbled and fought. They complained about the house we lived in and about what they needed and wanted. They didn’t like the warm winters in Southern California and complained about it not being cold and snowy like it was when they were little and we were one big happy family making snowmen and cocoa at this time of year. They would say things like, “How can it be Christmas when it’s 72 degrees outside?” or, “Why did we ever move here?” I would give them some easy assurance that everything was fine and this was going to be a great Christmas, nonetheless.

By the time I got to Grandma’s room, someone was feeding her a dinner of pureed vegetables, mashed potatoes and something else that didn’t look a bit appetizing. She was perched on the side of her bed and smiled at me when I walked in. I told the attendant that I’d take over and sat down with her. “How are you doing today, Grandma?” I said as I picked up her spoon and dipped it in the potatoes.

When she was younger, Grandma was 5 foot 10 and bulky. Almost all my life she was the tallest woman I knew and had a vibrancy about her that I was drawn to. Now she was smaller than me with pale pink skin and white hair. She smiled sadly, “I’m so glad you’re here, honey,” she mumbled. “Mrs. Peterson, my roommate left a few days ago and I’m all alone. But I think they’ll move someone in here in real soon,” she said in a soft Texas drawl.

“Oh, did her family come and take her home?” I asked

“No, Darlin’, she passed away.” Grandma turned her head a little and nodded towards the empty bed. “It’s just as well. Nobody ever came to see her anyway. But they let me keep her little Christmas tree.” She pointed to a 12-inch tall fake tree with tiny blinking lights next to her bed. “It’s kind of cute, isn’t it?” I smiled hollowly. It all seemed so contrived. This wasn’t where Grandma belonged; this wasn’t Christmas.

Grandma used to be young with fierce red hair and an attitude to match. Winters used to be cold and bundling up by the fire was cozy.  The children used to be small and filled with wonder and easily pleased with inexpensive gifts. I used to be married and have family around. It was all so different this year. I just wanted to go back! Back to when life was simpler and my dad would whoosh me up the steps to Grandma’s kitchen door and inside there’d be cousins and sisters and a big tree smashed up next to the front window. And ribbon candy in a pretty little glass dish on the coffee table, down low where all the children could reach it.

I only stayed a little while after dinner and then headed out to my car ready to drive home again.  I clutched my light coat around me as the wind blew past. It was completely dark and colder now than when I had arrived. “Well, at least it will feel more like Christmas!” I said to myself and thought that maybe the dip in temperature would make the girls feel better, too. I started out for home.

The freeway interchange confused me for a moment, since I was lost in thought about Christmases past, and I found myself headed south when I should have been going north. I was quickly in an area of town that I didn’t know, but I reasoned that if I just got off the freeway, there had to be an onramp close by and I could get going in the right direction. So I took the next exit, but there wasn’t an onramp and I began to wander through town. Follow the main road and head in the general direction you want to go, I told myself. There’ll be an onramp soon enough.

The houses were getting smaller, darker, drearier and more cramped. Corner liquor stores had bars on the windows and cheap flashing lights that spelled out “Merry Xmas”. I was paying full attention to where I was, now, and looking hopefully for an onramp when a young girl on the sidewalk caught my attention. The street light showed me that she was skipping. And singing and laughing and having a great time playing in the wind, apparently without a worry over what she wore or what she owned. The little house behind her seemed gray and forlorn, and there was a splash of warm light spilling out from between the front window drapes that weren’t completely closed. It was only an instant, but I got a sense of twinkling lights and coziness, and yet, destitution.

I didn’t mean to be judgmental, but I knew right then and there that for all I didn’t have, I still had more material goods than this girl did.

Maybe she was anticipating Christmas, maybe there was a great big Christmas tree at her house smashed up against the window. Maybe there were sisters and brothers and a grandma inside playing games; maybe there was one pretty glass dish filled with ribbon candy and they could all eat as much as they wanted. Maybe….

Almost immediately an onramp loomed up on my left and I quickly got back on the freeway heading home. I was looking forward to getting there and seeing my family again. I began to think of a few things I’d like to do for Christmas, like flying with the girls out to my sister’s place in the Tennessee hills for a wintery Christmas and what I could make or buy the girls as presents.

And then, astonishingly, something else happened. It was a flutter, just a bit of fluff, but I saw it: snow. In southern California. It was snowing in San Diego! Little drifts were accumulating along the edges of the freeway and in the median. I saw it illuminated in my headlights for a brief two miles, and then it was gone. But it was enough to remind me that as wonderful as Christmases past might have been, it’s my Christmas present and future that means the most.

Being satisfied with where I am in life—here and now—makes all the difference in the world. When I get home, I told myself, I’m going to hug my children, whether they want me to or not; I’ll ask them to play games, we’ll talk about going to Aunt Terri’s house and then… then I’m going to go out, find ribbon candy and put it out a little glass dish, even if I’m the only one who eats it!

“Ribbon Candy” is a fictional short story written by Jann Gentry (except for the part about snow in San Diego, that really did happen….)

Well, the family has been busy being sick. Just the highlights…

Grandpa gave us quite a scare a few days ago. He was brought in after collapsing at home. He was losing blood without a known cause. The severe lack of blood caused a heart attack. They couldn’t find the bleed because the hip surgery he had just went through had required the use of the dye they needed to find the bleed. Using the dye so closely together would have caused liver failure in his already weakened liver. We were pretty sure we were going to lose him… but he pulled through once again!

Mom was scheduled for her final chemo treatment last week, but they had to cancel it because her blood counts were down too low. She went in yesterday for it and they had to reduce the dosage to about half because she wasn’t feeling well. So, lucky her, there will be another session next Wednesday. She’s so sick of taking the pharmacy of pills and feeling lousy.

Grandma has been getting her cataracts dealt with. They were getting to the point that it seemed to hurt her to have her eyes open. She was constantly using eye drops. She kept putting it off because of Mom, but mom convinced her to get it done before they got unrepairable. She had surgery on one eye last week and the other eye today. It sounds like that should go well.

My friend Gretchen’s mom is not doing well at all. Her cancer has spread so far and so quickly that they just couldn’t get control of it. The lesions are in her brain, so the family has to deal with the unfortunate side effects… confusion, memory loss, and clumsiness. It has been very hard on Gretchen. She is pregnant with her second child and due in April. She had hoped her mom would live to see her grandson, but now they just pray she makes it to share one last Christmas with them.

Please help me to keep them all in prayers.

I was sent to bed by my husband around 9:00.  I slept until 1, almost 2 o’clock in the morning.  I got up and worked on scrap-booking.  I’m making presents for everyone this year.  My grandfather is getting a tribute to my grandma in scrapbook form.  The whole idea was that her recipes word be preserved.  She was an excellent cook, but the problem is that we don’t have any recipes she made because they were all in her head.  This may prove to be a problem.  I am continuing to work on the project because I have her favorite Sara Teasdale’s poems and songs she always sang to us.  I have a few pictures I can use, and an article about my grandfather’s purple heart.  How does that sound to you?

The title of the album is “delight yourself”.  Although she was not a believer until the end of her life, she had the quote, “Eat what is good and delight yourself in fatness” on the refrigerator  She said there was something for everyone inside the Bible.

She loved the hymn “Amazing Grace” and “The Garden” “(I come to the garden alone, where the dew is still on the roses”)  I think “Bridge over troubled water” was possibly her favorite pop song.  She loved “Goblin Market” because it reminded her of her sisters.  Both of them preceded her in death and she mourned for a long time.

Here is a bit of Goblin Market.  My grandma told me you can only understand it if you have a sister.  I only have one brother, no sisters, and it’s not that I don’t like it, I just see it from another angle.  The sister sacrificed herself for the sake of her sisters.  She is clearly a Christ figure, she immerses her self in temptation and sinful people to save her sister’s life.

“

Tender Lizzie could not bear
To watch her sister’s cankerous care,
Yet not to share.
She night and morning
Caught the goblins’ cry:
“Come buy our orchard fruits,
Come buy, come buy.”
Beside the brook, along the glen
She heard the tramp of goblin men,
The voice and stir
Poor Laura could not hear;
Longed to buy fruit to comfort her,
But feared to pay too dear”

I think you should read this poem.  It’s online, just type in it’s name.  Also, Christina Rossetti was printed in Playboy.  Just wanted to add that.

Now that I have your attention, I want to let you know that you can survive mania.  I promised not to leave the house except for talking Small to and from school, and to her play rehearsals.  We’re going to get our family photo today.  My hair is greasy because I haven’t washed it in three days, but it looks horrible it’s first day so I might just keep it this way.  I’m remembering to eat, taking almost twenty pills one sip of water at a time.  I got a pill stuck in my throat once, so I am more careful now.  I’m not flirting with men online (I don’t do that often).  I’m going to try and get chores done, but that most likely is not going to happen.

Other things to do to respond to the mania:  Take very hot baths or very cold showers.  Stay away from sweets.  Yesterday I felt like I was going into shock because I was eating cookies at a Christmas party, so don’t do that.  Eat regularly.  I find that to be especially difficult as I reach for the potato chips instead of a real meal.  It’s too easy to do that, but eating makes me feel oh so much better.  I crave alcohol at this time, but am good at getting away from it.  Mr. Malakoa has hard cider in the refrigerator and that is hard to resist, but I try not to think too much about it.  (I am a borderline alcoholic.)  Do try to get some sleep.  I’ll try to go to bed early but probably can’t.  If I wanted to take a nap now I couldn’t because it’s too early in the morning.  I wish I could because Small is at school and I could try and sleep un-interrupted. But I can’t.

The Bible warns about this, though.  It says, “A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest-and poverty will come on you like a bandit and scarcity like an armed man.”  I’m not too worried about it right now.  We’re already border-line poor.  I don’t know the p.c. way to say that.  I know I should get less sleep, but it’s a necessary part of treating my illness right now.  I am sad that things like this don’t seem to be something I can strive for.  There are other commandments or warnings in the Bible and I’m better about those.  I had four hours of sleep last night, but I don’t think that is what the Holy Spirit mean as He wrote those words.  He doesn’t want us sick, He wants us to be inspired and joyful.

That’s enough for today.  Thanks for reading.

“Mix together in a mixer eggs, sugar, chocolate. Add to fruit and nuts, add spices, molasses, whiskey and flour to make stiff batter. Fill pans 3/4 full and bake in slow over for 3 or 4 hrs.” — Kay Amorelli, my grandmother, explaining her fruitcake recipe

I was going through recipes to find a few party favorites and ran across my grandmother’s fruitcake recipe. She typed it, who knows when, for my dad, I guess.

Grandma, Popeye, Aunt Diane & Dad

In the middle of frantic Christmas party preparations — stacks of cookbooks, printed out recipes from friends, recipes scribbled on everything from construction paper to the back of receipts, and my laptop with epicurious.com at my ready — I stopped when I came to this one. The house is a disaster. The project of organizing the kids’ area upstairs will either require the rest of the day’s attention or a match. But for just a few moments, I stopped to remember one of my favorite people in the world. I put the piece of paper to my nose, enjoying the feel of the thick typing paper of the past and hoping without reason there would be some scent of her on the paper after all these years. Would I even remember her scent?

Grandma died when I was a freshman in college. We visited her in Las Vegas, where she lived with her second husband, fairly often it seemed. She sang to me, cooked for me, wrapped me up in her arms and Hawaiian moo moo. I slept with her when I was there and remember her once singing me to sleep. The only lyrics I remember are, “God will take care of me, in everything I do. God will take care of me, I know He will come through.” She told me a story once of how, when she’d lived someplace exotic with my grandfather (Popeye), she woke up one morning with a giant spider across her face.

Grandma & Sam

Grandma loved to cook. I have a painting of hers I want to frame for our kitchen. It’s her family, gathered around a table on a beach, I assume in Hawaii. I want to hang it above our dining room table — my grandfather’s table, around which I’m sure many of her meals were enjoyed and where my family eats dinner every night.

Grandma had many problems I wasn’t aware of as her granddaughter. As an adult, I could ponder her faults, what they did to my dad, my aunt, my grandfather. But I usually don’t. I sometimes wish she were around, as my Dad says I remind him of her and I wish I’d known her better. But maybe it’s best I’m left with only a child’s memory of her, a few beautiful photos, some paintings.

And a fruitcake recipe with just enough information to remember how much people loved it … but sketchy enough so it would be hard to recreate it exactly. Maybe, though, some recipes are better when they’re a little fuzzy around the edges.

My two great-grandchildren have never come to my house before to make Christmas cookies, but this year their mother thought they were old enough at 2 and 4 years to have the fun she used to have with all the flour and butter and cookie cutters.  Here’s their mother baking cookies when she was nine years old.

I supervised as great-granddaughter measured flour and sugar, and even broke an egg.

The two-year-old wanted to do anything his sister was doing and got right into the spirit.

Great-granddaughter soon caught on to the art of rolling cookie dough….

….and great-grandson let his mother help him, his only comment being, “Bite, bite” for bits of the cookie dough which we didn’t want him to have.

They each brushed milk and sprinkled colored sugar on a sheet full of wonderful cookies.

We used the same recipe from all those years ago – it’s a good one.

Grandma’s Sugar Crisps

Raving is alive and well.

Get your dance moves from this amazing granski just in time for the holidays.

To prepare for my trip to Puerto Vallarta, Mexico, I went to the public library to pick-up some beach reading. I hadn’t visited the library to check-out books unrelated to school since before J-school, instead borrowing books from friends or family, and sticking mostly to a diet of news. Stepping inside a public library always brings back memories of the library in Lancaster, California with my Grandma Barry (a children’s librarian who this blog is dedicated to).

There was story time, sitting in a circle on the deep red carpet decorated with the alphabet and numbers. Then, there was the stamping of books, my favorite part. I would perch myself next to Grandma as she checked-out library books.  Grandma would look at the patron’s library card, open the flap of the book, take out the card and file it, grab her date stamper, wheel to the correct month, date and year, ink the stamper up in black and press firmly on the lined page inside the book. It was about a five minute process that was fascinating as a four-year-old in pigtails and overalls. Today, when I visited the small neighborhood library in Fairfield, California, the friendly librarians like Grandma Barry were no more. Instead, there were automated checkout machines.

So simple, even little kids were using the machines. Scan the barcodes on your library card and books, and you’re done. I checked out “Caramelo” by Sandra Cisneros, “Chocolat” by Joanne Harris and “Animal Dreams” by Barbara Kingsolver, in about 30 seconds flat. Boy would Grandma Barry get a kick out of that!

Here’s an example of the library scanner I used as seen at the San Jose Public Library, from their Flickr Photo Stream.

My Plain Grandma passed away unexpectedly five years ago tomorrow.  I spoke at her service and this is what I said. I’m sharing it because I want it out there how amazing she was, how she loved with every fiber of her being, how funny she was.  I want everyone to experience a tiny bit of the wonderful Grandma I had.  I was lucky and I know it.

Grandma when she was younger

A little history on her name.  We had a Great Grandma and a Grandma Margaret, but our other grandma was so special and wonderful, that all she needed was to be called plain grandma…and it stuck and she became Plain Grandma. When I had the girls, she became Great Grandma and my mom became Plain Grandma.  That ended with her, but it started with my Plain Grandma.

12/3/04

Saturday, I took a nap and was using one of the quilts my Grandma made for me to keep warm.  As I was lying there, thinking of all the memories I have of my Grandma, I realized most of them were of her keeping me warm, one way or another.

Both my Grandma and Grandpa have always been a warm, comforting place for my sister and me to go, in their home and their hearts.  She has given so much love to so many people; in the amazing things she made us, the talks she gave us, all the times she was there for us, taking care of us, was all showing us how much she loved us.

These are the things that remind me of my Grandma:

• The smell of Dove soap [that’s why I use it!]

• DELUXE Kraft Macaroni & Cheese [we only got it at her house

when we were kids]

• Egads!  [Her favorite swear word]

• Her squeak when you tugged her ear when she was lauging

• Sewing patterns [We owe half our childhood wardrobe to her]

• Life cereal

• Pictures where everyone’s head got cut off!

• Ground beef tacos  [of course, with lettuce and tomatoes

chopped up]

• The comics section of the newspaper used for wrapping paper

[because it was the only section in color!]

• Her singing a lullaby to

Michelle and I were little. I loved the

sound of her voice.  It was one only she sang, and I sang it to my girls.

I remember my Grandma always being there for me.  Even though my Grandma is now in Heaven, her quilts are like her hugs, and I will always be warmed by them.  I know she’s with her Mom and Heidi, taking walks.

The best way we can honor her is to remember all the love she gave us and celebrate her life.  She wouldn’t want us to grieve the loss of her, because she will always be with us in our hearts.

…………………………………………………

Twelve days later, my Mom joined her in heaven.  I feel them both with me at times and we’ve had some very interesting experiences that I know are them.  Every day I think of them and miss them terribly.  But I can hear Granny saying, “Don’t worry, be happy” as she often did.

I love you Granny and I miss you more than you’ll ever know.

   ———————————————–

       Em                                                            D
          She’d been drinking too much egg nog
                                                             G
          and we warned her not to go
                                                          C
          but she forgot her medication
                              G                                    D             G
          and she wandered out the door into the snow

      
          When we found her Christmas morning
     
          at the scene of the attack

          there were hoofprints on her forehead

          and incriminating claw marks on her back

[CHORUS]

Now were all so proud of Grandpa

he’s been taking this so well

see him in there watching football

drinking beer and playing cards with cousin mel
         

          It’s not Christmas without grandma

          all the familys dressed in black

          and we just cant help but wonder

          should we open up her gifts or send them back !

[CHORUS]
         

          Now the goose is on the table

          and the pudding made of fig

          and the blue and silver candles

          that would just have matched the hair in Grandma’s wig

         
I’ve warned all my friends and neighbors

          better watch out for your selfs

          they should never give a license

          to a man who dirves a sleigh and plays with elves !

[CHORUS]

Bought a grandma or grandpa themed gift last year and now you wonder what to buy this year, then think about purchasing a practical gift to use around the house. Do you have an older loved one who still lives at home but is finding life a little difficult? Then these suggested gift ideas for around the house can help make life a little easier for them. The gift of independence is sometimes the greatest gift of all!

As we all get older our eyes seem to grow weaker, and in fact some young people just have poor vision to begin with. That is why we LOVE these large print items! The Large Print Address Book lets you look up information faster when you can see it better. Also includes more space/line so you can include every bit of information you may need in the future. The Large Print Calendar is easier to view and use. Larger squares mean you can enter more information/ multiple events if need be. The Large Print Weekly Planner is great for the busy senior. Keep all your appointments and important dates in order in this easy to view and use notebook style.

Does your special senior have mobility issues? Well keep them coming and going in ease with this Easy Open Door Knob Lever. It easily attaches to any doorknob to give your senior greater leverage. Comes in handy, especially when trying to open a door while carrying something.

Is grandma your favorite cook? Want to keep her happy in the kitchen? Then consider this ultimate in kitchen gadgets for seniors gift box! The Kitchen Helpers Gift Basket, includes the EZ grip jar opener, which helps senior open jars without straining their hands, a box top cutter for opening those tough to open cardboard food boxes, a set of big number measuring cups and a set of big number measuring spoons, with easy to see numbers, the Magic chopper, and a hands-free can opener, which helps seniors open cans without holding the cans. This gift box is an amazing value and would be of great use to any senior in their kitchen. Help make life a little easier for that special older loved one in your life!

Taking pills and other medicine becomes a fact of life as you age. Help keep things straight and organized with this Large Size Pill Organizer. The easy to read days of the week are great for people with low vision, and the large container size is easier to hold and open. Want to keep you medication straight and not mix them up when it comes time to take one or the other? Then the Pill Bottle Magnifier could very well be a life saver!

Want to make life a little easier for a special elderly person? Consider purchasing talking items. When an item talk to them that means less eye squinting and less twisting and turning to see something. One of our favorites is the Talking Thermometer. It tells you the temperature reading before the number can disappear from those typical tiny digital displays you see on store models. This item is also great when dealing with small children. The Talking Calculator is also another great item. Enter your numbers and let it tell you the exact amount you’re looking for. Looking for another life saver? The Talking CPR Rescue Flashlight can be of help in an emergency situation. This unit walks you through step by step how to perform CPR, as well as acts as a flashlight. This mutlit-use tool could save a life one day.

Over the Thanksgiving holiday, my sister-in-law, Meghan, decided she’d like to create a photo album of her new daughter, Liliana. Meghan, who lives in Virginia with Liliana, wanted to offer this album to our Grandma, Carol, for Christmas. See, Grandma lives in Upstate New York and has not yet had the chance to meet her great grand-daughter who recently turned 10 months old. Fortunately, I’ve had several portrait sessions with this little baby since her birth. So we sat down, Meghan and I, and edited all the pictures that I’ve taken over the past few months and years. After several hours of editing, we had our top 65 pictures.

The best advice came from my step-brother-in-law, Matt, when he suggested that we use iPhoto to create our photo album. Having considered the cost of printing these images on our own and buying a separate photo album it really did make sense financially to have iPhoto make the book for us. So with a few drags and drops, our book was ready to be shipped!

I cannot wait to see Grandma’s reaction…a REAL book with pictures of her family?!? A dust jacket, hardcover and over 30 pages of family moments! I am already planning to have my point and shoot at my side so I can record her opening her gift. (She still gushes about the scarf I knit her 4 years ago that matches her winter jacket “perfectly”, and in my opinion, this album knocks the socks off that scarf!)

By the way, our Grandma is 88 years old, sharp as a tack with the memory of an elephant! This is going to be priceless!

grandma, your shoes are on sale!

for a small price

call it fate…they’re reduced to just over $1,900.  but don’t think of shipping them to california as they’re real snake skin and that’s not allowed in sunny ca.

My grandma died last week. She was 92. She’d had 3 husband and a number of adoptive families throughout her life, was taken in by nuns at one point, and went by 6 different names at various different times (most before her mid-20s).

I took some poor photos of photos from her old album, something about the added fuzziness of the copies seems apt – memories, identity, loss – all that.

Something she left behind: a book of poems, written in perfect copper-plate hand-writing, in a way more personal than any photo. Or maybe i just think that because I am a ‘book person’ and have pile upon piles of sketchbooks from over the last dozen years?

So long, grandma. We miss you.

Just because you’ve reached a certain age doesn’t mean you have to stop living and having fun, just ask any senior citizen you know! However, mobility and vision issues may pose a problem as some people do get older. Taking this all into consideration we have compiled a list of great gifts for active seniors. Whether physically or mentally active we all know that keeping one’s mind and body in shape helps towards a longer and happier life.

When looking for gifts for an active senior we recommend these games. Also don’t forget to consider any hobbies they may have.

Grandma Golf Balls or Grandpa Golf Balls make the perfect gift for the grandparent who likes to tee off. Golfing is a great way to spend time outdoors while getting some physical exercise. Need golf balls to celebrate a special birthday? Look at these 50, 60, 70, and 80 themed golf balls.

Does your special senior like to go to the casino? Love to play cards with friends or alone? The Large Screen Poker Game and Large Screen Solitaire Game make perfect gifts for grandma or grandpa to keep up on their skills. Perfect to play with at home or easy enough to take along anywhere they go. Want to share the fun? Large Print Playing Cards make it easy for seniors to see the hand they’ve been dealt.

In this day of video games and computers board games may be a thing of the past for this generation’s children, but the past is what these board games mean to capture! With games like the Reminiscing Game and Life Stories players get to reflect and tell stories about the past. Great to play with friends and especially family!

Who doesn’t love a good puzzle? Now Grandma and Grandpa can enjoy the art of the puzzle with these large piece, low vision, puzzles. The larger pieces are easier to handle and the puzzle art appears larger. Great for seniors and children! The perfect gift for grandparents to share with grandkids!

Does your active senior want to stay that way? Keep them in shape and in the holiday spirit with this special edition of the Sit and Dance DVD series. Need an exercise video grandma or grandpa can use throughout the rest of the year? Then consider this Sit and Be Fit DVD. Both DVDs show easy and safe ways to exercise.

One of the biggest concerns facing the elderly is their ability to remember and retain information. Keeping the brain active and healthy is just as important as physical body work as you age. The Healthy Brain Kit is an easy way to get started on the road to good brain health. Games can be especially helpful when working to exercise your brain muscles. The 20 Questions Big Screen Game gets you asking questions and generating answers. Perfect to play alone or in a group, see who can stump the machine. Fun for play with grandchildren too!

Love all these ideas but just can’t choose? Then consider the Senior Games Gift Basket. This Activity Basket comes with some of the above suggestions and then more! Makes a great Christmas gift in its holiday themed box.

Looking for a Grandma Christmas Gift? Check out our new guide to Grandmother Gifts!

Looking for a Grandpa Christmas Gift? Check out our new guide to Grandfather Gifts!

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Matthew thought that Isabelle would like to go up to the mountains for her birthday because she loves the mountains so much, so we planned a trip up to Arrowhead. Boy were we surprised when the forecast said snow! We invited both our parents and we had a super time.  It snowed and was beautiful up there.  The kids got to play in the snow and we all had a great time.  It was perfectly relaxing and quiet and beautiful.  It was also not too much snow so we weren’t in any danger of being snowed in.

This was Lily’s first trip and first snow trip, but she slepted it away.