I mentioned Benjamin WREN of Framfield, Sussex yesterday, so what better reason to show you a picture of his gravestone, photographed back in May 2009 when I visited Framfield.

There is some writing around the top of the stone, which I can’t make out, but the main part of the inscription is very clear:

OF
BENJAMIN WREN,
WHO DEPARTED THIS LIFE
DECEMBER 21ST 1852
IN THE 50TH YEAR OF HIS AGE
ALSO OF
CHARLOTTE, HIS WIDOW.
WHO DEPARTED THIS LIFE
NOVEMBER 19TH 1882,
IN THE 83RD YEAR OF HER AGE.
IN THE MIDST OF LIFE WE ARE IN DEATH.

This handsome looking young man is my 2x great-uncle Ernest Arthur TROWER. He was the son of Ebenezer and Annie TROWER, who was born in Sayers Common, Sussex in 1895. He was baptised in the parish church at Sayers Common on the 13th October 1895. His life was tragically cut short when he was killed in action in France on the 23rd September 1917, aged 22 years old.

To my knowledge there are three memorials that record the name of Ernest Arthur TROWER and the sacrifice he made. Two of these I have not seen in person and one I have visited and photographed several times.

The first and most obvious is the memorial that I have already mentioned at Tyne Cot Cemetery in Belgium. Maintained by the Commonwealth War Graves Commission, Ernest is listed among the thousands of men with no known grave. It is my goal to visit Tyne Cot in the next couple of years and pay my respects, maybe even next year.

Secondly there is the war memorial inside Sayers Common parish church. I have not yet seen the memorial, but according to the Roll of Honour website it is a wooden plaque inside the church with the names of six men who died in the First World War and seven who died in the Second World War.

Interestingly of the six men who died in the First World War who are commemorated there, I have connections to at least two of them, and probably a third. As well as Ernest there is also William James GASSON another 2x great uncle, and Albert Edward SEYMOUR would probably have been the brother-in-law of my 2x great aunt Edith Ellen TROWER had he still been alive in 1923 when Edith married.

The third memorial is also in Sayers Common, Ernest is remembered on the gravestone of his sister Mabel Annie TROWER, who is buried in Sayers Common churchyard. I have previously featured this photo as a Tombstone Tuesday post.

The gravestone of Mabel Annie TROWER and Ernest Arthur TROWER

There is of course a fourth place where he is remembered, and that is in my family history. So long as my research survives the memory of Ernest Arthur TROWER and his sacrifice will also survive. Hopefully now that these four posts are out on the internet the life of Ernest will never be forgotten.

Down from the church where etched names had faded to leave numbers.

Two years old. Six months old. Twelve years old.

The valley spread out before them as was and will be. Nothing here has moved. Nothing is moving still.

And the cars are lined up at the bottom of the hill, passengers bowed and the engines muffled. Surrounding what is, ridiculously, a roundabout. What was, before, and is, somehow, a monument. A lone pillar. And a circle of us. Watching.

Names here etched and not faded. Not in stone and not in memory. Each syllable on the lips of the blue blazers, with red poppies and a row of shined metal.

And the bugler blows as the signal for it to begin. Silence, then. And still nothing moves.

School children in yellow jumpers hold flags and know that something happened, but the generation has slipped. It’s not Grandad now. And it’s an ask to make them understand it. You can see that, you can see there are less each time.

But there is enough, today. Ironed. Pressed. Combed. Each year to relive what was. It is a shared burden. It is a kind of death, still.

And the church bells ring as those chosen lay wreaths at the foot of concrete to remember.

And then the army major screams his order and the drum beats the march and the procession turns and marches up the hill.

The church waits, as it always does. It’s doors always open to receive those who always will end up there. Names that soon too, will fade to leave numbers.

I went back to my home town to place some roses on my grandma’s grave. I haven’t been to her grave since she was buried in November 2004. She passed away 1 November, 2004 – All Saint’s Day (I’m Lutheran, as was grandma). She was hospitalized after a stroke and died about a week later. On Halloween 2004 (the day before she died) I was so sad I decided to go to a funny movie in order to get away from my grief. I went to “Shaun of the Dead”, which was the best movie I could have chosen haha. My mum called me early the next morning to tell me grandma had died, I went to the hospital to sit with her one last time; the room was plain, much unlike my beautiful and lively Norwegian grandma, but I wasn’t afraid to be alone with her. I am glad I sat with her alone, the final time, for a few minutes that seemed to last days and  but also felt as though it were no time at all. I no longer go out on Halloween, rather as a tribute, every 31 October I stay home and watch “Shaun of the Dead” in her memory.

I miss my grandma (and gramps, too) so much sometimes it aches to breathe. She was a wonderful and sweet and kind and strong lady; and I think about her every single day: how her skin was always cool and smooth, how strong her hands were, and how she used to pop her dentures out for me when i was little (because I thought it was the COOLEST thing ever when she did that); or how when she died my mum told me she wasn’t sure if she could live without her parents, that she always thought she would die with them, the roses engraved on her casket and how she looked small in death. I remember a story my mum told us all at my grandma’s wake, about how grandma became fed up with grandpa’s drinking (he was Irish) and she took off for Norway for an entire summer haha. She was this altogether soft and brilliant woman who loved pink and Princess Di and collecting china; but make no mistake she didn’t take any shit from no one. There are so many wonderful memories I have of her and I wish I were little again so I could relive the time I spent with her and gramps. But alas, we are, “one equal tember of heroic hearts / made weak by time and fate” (Tennyson).

How I wish you were here.

I also placed a stone on her and gramp’s grave site. I know placing a stone on a grave is Jewish tradition, but I always wondered what this tradition meant (other than the obvious). I researched it and here is the reason why: It was to tell future visitors that others have came to respect the dearly departed. Back in olden days (haha), when the tradition began, grave monuments were mounds of stone; visitors added stones to “the mound” to show we are never finished building the monument to the deceased. I think that is a beautiful tradition.

I wandered through Spring Hill Cemetery in Easton, Maryland, this past Sunday afternoon and came across this gravestone, which reads “In Memory of William Hayward, Born Feb. 10, 1876, Died June 8, 1880, from the effects of a cruel accident.”

Willie Hayward's Gravestone

I’m usually drawn to the gravestones of children anyhow — it’s saddening to think they died so young and you can’t help but wonder about the circumstances. This stone’s engraving really piqued my interest. My morbid curiosity got the better of me — I simply had to try and find out what happened.

Unfortunately, there isn’t easy access to old archives of the Easton, Md., newspaper (The Star-Democrat) online. What I can access from my computer at home only goes back to 2005. I tried a couple of searches in Baltimore Sun databases, thinking that a sensational incident might have earned coverage in that paper, but didn’t have any luck.

Next, I tried the archives of The Denton Journal, through the web site of the Caroline County Public Library (I’ve done research there and so my library card code works on their site as well). Really noteworthy Easton-based stories often made this paper, even though the events happened in the neighboring county.

Searching for “William Hayward” in quotes between 1880 and 1881 didn’t return any results, but when I removed the quotes, I found what I was looking for.

The article was actually about “little Willie Hayward” (luckily, the name William appeared elsewhere on the same newspaper page). The headline says it all: “Gored to Death by a Bull.” The article gets pretty graphic. I’m only including a portion here.

Masthead

Gored to Death by a Bull

“Gored to Death by a Bull,” The Denton Journal, 12 June 1880, p. 1, col. 3; digital images, Caroline County Public Library Electronic Databases (http://www.caro.lib.md.us : accessed 25 October 2009), The Newspaper Archives of the Denton Journal.

The article simply placed Willie in the wrong place at the wrong time — the bull was being driven down one of the streets of Easton, and after becoming spooked, charged and gored the little boy. Willie’s injuries were so grievous that he died a few hours later.

Rocco Siciliano, 1885-1925 Hermitage, Pennsylvania

“One distinctive aspect of the Italian American cemeteries is the ceramic photo images imbedded into memorial stones. [...] One writer commented that it was good that few Italian Americans could afford such stone portraits. He stated that if ‘there was much of this, our burial grounds would become ghostly indeed.’ [...] Another writer noted that the photographic portrait was ‘not merely the likeness’ of the deceased. It was ‘the very shadow of the person lying there fixed forever!’ These memorials became a staple in the cemeteries of other ethnic groups from eastern and southern Europe, no matter what their religion.” – Meg Green, Rest in Peace: A History of American Cemeteries

Vincenza Piccini headstone, Hermitage, Pennsylvania

Many Italian Americans made Western Pennsylvania their home at the turn of the 20th century when the coal mines and steel mills were flourishing. I’ve explored two of these cemeteries, though I’m sure there are many others for me to discover! These are Economy Cemetery in Ambridge, PA and St. Anthony/St. Rose/Italian Cemetery in Hermitage, PA.

Left and Center: A priest and Anna Popik, both in Ambridge. Right: Anna Wesko, Hermitage.

Both cemeteries not only include the Italian American grave stones with ceramic photographs, but also those of Eastern European families, such as Ukranian or Slovak. (I’m really only good with the Italian translations, so if I’m wrong about the ethnicity of those stones, let me know.) Because these two ethnic groups arrived in the States around the same time, worked the same types of jobs, and were generally treated the same by the larger American population, the two groups of immigrants often stuck together, forming Italian-Slovak societies, interchanging customs, and intermarrying.

Left and Center: A Slovak girl and Antonio Incerto, both in Hermitage. Right: Ibah Aennhko in Ambridge.

Today, having a photograph mounted to a gravestone is rather common. Some people even have their image laser etched onto the marble itself (which in my opinion can look a little creepy, and I can’t imagine what it will look like if the stone begins to wear). At the turn of the century, however, ceramic grave photographs were mostly confined to the Italian and Eastern European cultures. For historians and genealogists, the photographs offer a unique opportunity to see photographs from the early 20th century and match them up with the names and ages of who they belong to.  

Two very similar gravestones in Ambridge, PA. Silvia Lepre (left) and Maria Palladini (right)

Most of the gravestones that have ceramic photographs belong to children or young men and women. One explanation is that parents were more likely to endure the extra expense of the ceramic photograph as a result of their grief of losing a loved one “before their time.” Another explanation might be that a large number of children and young people died during the the time period when ceramic photographs were most popular (1900-1940) due to disease or tragic event. I suppose I’ll just have to do more research on that topic.

Antonio Catanzariti (left) and Bettina Rinaldi (center) in Ambridge. Francesca Paola Perry (right) in Hermitage.

One creepy part of looking at ceramic gravestone photographs is the occurance of post-mortem images. Most of the time, post-mortem images are of infants and children, so if the image of dead babies disturbs you, beware. Most of the time, the photographs are studio photographs taken by a professional photographer in a prepared setting. And most of the time, the children are photographed to look as though they are sleeping. (Mourning or Memorial Cabinet Cards were also popular in the mid to late 19th century. Search for some on Flickr to see some.) Why in the world would a parent allow their lifeless child to be photographed in such a way? I’m sure every reason is different, but one probable reason is that they were too young to have their picture taken in life.

WARNING: The following are some photos that may or may not be post mortem.

A brother and sister (left) in Ambridge. Sisters Angiolina (center) and Margretta Santelli (right) in Hermitage.

The cemetery in Patrica, Italy.

Recently, my husband and I travelled to Patrica, Frosinone, Italy. Patrica is the town where most Italian American immigrants settling in Ambridge, PA originated. My own paternal grandparents are from there. The cemetery in Patrica is very different that most cemeteries in the United States and even in other places in Italy. No one is interred in the ground. Instead, everyone is buried in the walls, and the walls are built up upon different levels of a hill. The owners of the plot do not own it outright, but instead rent or lease it for maybe 80 years… the family has the opportunity to renew their lease and bury other family members there. Sometimes, bones are moved to a smaller plot, and when the bones are completely deteriorated, they are removed and discarded in some fashion, though I’m not exactly sure how. All I know is that the oldest grave in Patrica was maybe 1908 or so.

The burial plot of the Ferrari family, Patrica, Italy

The gravestones of the Patrica cemetery nearly all had ceramic photographs, although often time there were more names engraved on a stone than photographs. There is a greater occurance of photographs of elderly people, but there also was a lot of post mortem infant photographs as well that dated into the 1960s. Another thing about the Italian graves was that many of the post mortem photographs were not made to look as though they were asleep at all. In fact, some of the children in photographs had their eyes open.

Well, it’s been a while since I last blogged, so I figured I was way past due.  Actually in my defense, I’ve been out photographing—spending some time in England, and most recently this past weekend in West Virginia freezing my rear off in unseasonably bad weather trying to capture iconic autumn images.  The colors were not great this year, but those complaints are best left to another blog posting. 

As a follow up to my last post about Little Gracie Watson at Bonaventure Cemetery, I wanted to share a recent experience I had a few weeks ago while visiting London’s most infamous cemetery, Highgate.  I promise my next blog posting will be a little lighter. 

Highgate is widely considered to be one of the spookiest Gothic Victorian cemeteries in the world—with a colorful past that is rumored to include occult ceremonies and even sightings of the alleged Highgate Vampire.  Bram Stoker was reportedly inspired to write Dracula after visiting.  Hidden behind a tangled web of overgrown ivy and briar, where even the light gasps to find air, I can only imagine what Stoker must have been thinking as he quietly sat among the eerie Gothic monuments, vaults and catacombs strewn throughout the dark forests of Highgate. 

Highgate is not only one of the world’s most notorious cemeteries, it’s also one of the most exclusive—especially if you are a photographer.  The more ominous West Cemetery can only be accessed through guided tours, and tripods are strictly not allowed—which can be extremely challenging in the dim light conditions (the East Cemetery is self guided and much more accessible to the general public).  After weeks of back and forth email correspondence and much pleading, I was able to secure exclusive permission to photograph on the west side.  As an aside, I did provide a donation to the cemetery historic trust, which I was more than happy to do to help maintain this storied landmark. 

While I was only able to visit for two hours, it was an amazing experience—conjuring up my imagination in so many ways.  I’ll admit that the spooky aspect of the cemetery was one of the reasons I wanted to visit Highgate in the first place.   Yet despite its colorful past and almost mythical outward facade, I could not help but think that there are real people with real stories buried in this cemetery—families, fathers, sons, daughters and lost loves.  There is a certain tragic irony in only looking at a place as a distorted caricature of itself.  But underneath the thick overgrown ivy, hides the true essence and poetry of this place—visible to those who are able to see its rare beauty.

Entrance to Egyptian Avenue

The Boxer and His Loyal Dog Lion

Circle of Lebanon

Egyptian Avenue Tombs - HDR

Tomb Door

A few weeks ago, I went out with a friend at night to get some snaps. We first stopped in a graveyard where I took the picture below. Upon uploading to my comp I noticed in the space between the tree and the tombstones are what appears to be two eyes looking at the camera. I’m sure they’re not eyes and I’m sure there’s a perfectly normal explanation for what they are, but I’ve looked and looked and can’t figure it out and wondered if anyone else had any ideas as to what it could be? Thanks for reading.

Leonhard and Katherine (Protz) Seybold stone

My 2nd great grandparents, Leonhard and Katherine Seybold, came to America from Germany in 1857. They settled on their homestead in Brillion Twp., Calumet County, Wisconsin in 1864. They are buried in Forest Home Cemetery, which is a few miles from where they farmed.

1893 Plat Map of Brillion Twp. showing the Seybold Homestead and Forest Home Cemetery (Click to Enlarge)

St.Simon & St.Jude Roman Catholic Cemetery

Grande Anse, New Brunswick, Canada

Laurette BOUDREAU (m. Theriault)

1959

Laurette Boudreau

1885 – 1959

Epouse de

Theophile Theriault

1874 – 1960

Genealogy Notes: Theophile Theriault and Laurette Boudreau were married on April 24th 1922 in New Bandon (Grande Anse). Source: New Brunswick Vital Statistics: RS141B7 Index to New Brunswick Marriages, Number: 1785, Reference: B4/1922, Microfilm: F19681.

Related Posts:

St.Simon & St.Jude Cemetery – Grande Anse, New Brunswick

Cemeteries

I was down at Lewes, East Sussex again today. Apart from a brief visit to the East Sussex Record Office I also wanted to visit Lewes Cemetery. I knew there had to be relations buried there, and wanted to get a feel for what the place was like and what would be involved in trying to locate them.

I had taken a peek at an aerial view of the cemetery on Google Maps and knew it was big, but I hadn’t quite appreciated how big it was until I actually got there.

It was obvious that I wouldn’t be able to check every gravestone in the time I had, so I just wandered around the cemetery scanning as many headstones as I could trying to pick out any family names. Obviously this wasn’t going to be very successful, but I did come up with a few GEERING gravestones including that of William and Emily GEERING, my 2x great grandparents.

Two GEERING graves at Lewes Cemetery

There were three things that really stood out for me about Lewes Cemetery, that made me fall in love with the place straight away. Firstly was the position, it is on a south facing slope (they should be growing grapes there) with fantastic views across to the South Downs to the east and west.

View of the South Downs from Lewes Cemetery

Secondly, there was the condition of the cemetery. It was immaculate, all credit to the Lewes District Council and their contractors, there was hardly a blade of grass out of place. I was expecting to find some areas overgrown and abandoned to nature, but no it was all well trimmed and very neat and tidy, so no scrambling through the undergrowth needed.

Thirdly, and this made me smile because it was totally unexpected. They have their own public toilets. In my limited experience of cemeteries I have never come across one with a toilet, admittedly most of my ancestors were buried in small rural cemeteries or churchyards so my experience of large town cemeteries is very limited. It was a shame I didn’t need to use the facilities at the time!

One of the memorials at Lewes Cemetery

There’s a new (to Panasonic) ‘High Dynamic’ option on the ZX1 camera, and here are a couple of scenes from my favourite churchyard in Berkshire that illustrate what happens:

Off

On

Pros: shadow detail is enhanced (see the church wall in the background and to some extent in the hedge behind the gate on the left

Cons: the gate pillars look a bit anaemic with the dark contrast of the flint watered down somewhat

Side by side

This shot is against the sun rather than with the sun behind me, and the High Dynamic option seems to rob the scene of its contrast, washing out the highlights.

Select Cemeteries of Quebec & New Brunswick

-  A Canadian Family Photo Archives: Headstones -

 Anctil/S-Jean, Jean - 18th century

Aube, Agnes – 1923

Berube: Riviere-Ouelle Memorial Headstone

Blanchard,Olivier –

Boudreau, Laurette –  1959

Deschamps – 1783

Doucet, Alexander – 1931 

Doucet, Marie – 1920 

Dugas, Christine – 1938

Dumas, Philomene – 1942

Emond: Riviere-Ouelle Memorial Stone

Legresley, Elisabeth, 1977 

The Levesques of Riviere-Ouelle  - 18th century

Levesque, Marguerite –

Luce,  Evelyne  – 1976

 Luce, Philip – 1892

Melanson, Elizabeth 1943  Most Recent!

Pinet, Gertrude – 1938

Riviere-Ouelle Memorial Headstone: Roussel

Theriau, Anastasie

Theriault, Antoine – 1949 

Theriault, Emma – 1953

Theriault, Dominique – 1933

Theriault, Georges – 1933

Theriault, Israel - 1939

Theriault, Marie Priscille, 1947 

Theriault, Sylvestre – 1915

-  Articles  -

“Good night, good night! Parting is such sweet sorrow …”

St.Simon & St.Jude Cemetery (Index) – Grande Anse, New Brunswick

Note: Headstones are added on a weekly basis.

Many of you think we do a lot of senseless whining here at YourBoro. Well for once, we’re writing about something we’re totally psyched about. Something we should all be proud of:

Our cemetery – quite possibly more inspired than 95% of the artists on campus.

Honestly, though, I’ve never seen a cemetery like this, and I recommend each and every one of you to check it out. Make sure you go all the way to the back of it. That’s where you’ll find this awe-inspiring treasure trove of unique gravestones. The most famous of which being this:

Yep. That is Yoda, famed Jedi Master from the Star Wars saga. I saw this headstone for the first time a few years ago, and honestly wasn’t that shocked by it. I thought these kinds of things were commonplace. There must be thousands of people with Star Wars themed headstones, right? Then, today, I checked out Google. I seriously searched dozens of terms; “star wars gravestone, star wars headstone, star wars cemetery, star wars tombstone,” etc. The only terms that came up with anything were “yoda tombstone” and the only applicable results were images of THIS VERY STONE. This website and this website do not show you the backside, however.

Of course it’s silly to put etchings of someone’s favorite sci-fi movie characters (and aircrafts) on their tombstone. But obviously, Mr. Scarlett’s family would not have done it if they thought it would not make him happy. And that seems to be a running theme throughout this part of the cemetery.

…

A number of the gravestones are etched with portraits of couples, like these two examples. People always talk about loving each other “til death do us part”, but I really think this is a lot more romantic. Your lasting image of yourself to the rest of the world, and you’re sharing it with your husband/wife? It’s heart-warming and heart-breaking, all at the same time.

Others are simply tributes to someone’s personality. Virginia Kraus seems like she was awesome. Just look at the attitude in her face. I love it.

And there’s Michael Onda! You know him from the scenic Mike Onda Beach, directly across from the cemetery on Route 99.

Don’t know how to feel about this one.

My point in all of this is to explain why I think the Edinboro cemetery demands admiration, awe and respect. The departed souls of our town rest here, and the images on their graves tell deep and beautiful stories. Unlike graveyards of generations past, with large monoliths and ornate sculptures of choirs of angels and multitudes of saints, this cemetery embraces the idea of the self. These headstones are tiny legacies; beautiful, slighty tacky, at times geeky, but ultimately still beautiful.

]]> http://photodelusions.wordpress.com/2009/10/13/joshua-north-swallowfield/ Tue, 13 Oct 2009 08:00:00 +0000 Howard http://photodelusions.wordpress.com/2009/10/13/joshua-north-swallowfield/

A headstone in a somewhat overgrown churchyard in Swallowfield, Berkshire

I was driving today and flipped to WXCY, the local country station.  I grew up listening to country music, but I’ve moved away from it the last several years.

Song- “I’ll Wait For you” Artist- Joe Nichols

This song came on the radio.  I just cried.  It brought back so many memories and thoughts.

One of my huge fears was that John would die while I wasn’t there.  I hated to leave him.  I remember sleeping on the air bed downstairs while he was in his hospital bed.  I’d wake up from a sound sleep afraid something had happened to him.  I didn’t want to wake him.  When John was sick, he often slept for just a few hours at a time and never got enough sleep.  I’d sit there and watch till I could see he was breathing and then I’d go back to sleep.

I hated when he was in the hospital and he sent me home.  He didn’t want Nathaniel to be without a parent overnight.  He worried that Nathaniel might wake up with a bad dream and not have a parent to hold him and comfort him.  I could understand, respect, and honor that, but my heart wanted to be with John.  I knew Nathaniel was in good hands.  I was always terrified something would happen to John and I wouldn’t be there for him.

I can’t tell you how much it meant when AFD stayed with him for his IL2 treatments to make sure he was okay and always had a familiar face when he was receiving his treatments and suffering from the wicked side effects.

John’s last night was the only night he allowed me to stay in the hospital with him.  It was getting late and I asked him if he wanted me to stay or go.  In a small, weak voice he said he didn’t care.  I lingered and asked him again.  He said very quietly and softly, that he wanted me to stay.  I’m so glad that I did.  Neither of us knew it would be our last night together.

There is a gravestone at the cemetery that gets to me.

Brookview headstone

It’s not because Brown was my maiden name and it’s not because the wife’s first name is Mary.  What gets to me is the difference in the dates of birth.  The husband passed away in 1903.  The wife lived till 1951.

Now, I don’t know Mary or Elwood’s story.  In my head I picture a devoted wife living alone for 48 years.  Forty eight years of sleeping alone in a bed.  Forty eight years of being lonely.  Forty eight years of missing her husband.  Forty eight years of sadness.  Left with just memories for forty eight long, lonely years.

Who knows what the true situation was.  Perhaps Mary Emily Brown re-married and just chose to be buried with her first husband.  Perhaps Mary Emily dated frequently, was the life of the party, and always happy.  Who knows.

I just picture Mary Emily spending forty eight lonely years alone.

Here is John’s parent’s headstone

Dave & Ann's headstone

Ann lived almost ten years as a widow.  I loved his mother dearly, but we rarely spoke of intensely personal things.  I was too polite and respectful to ask and she didn’t volunteer.  Only on very rare occasions did she tell me how much she missed Dave and I think that was after her terminal cancer diagnosis.  It just wasn’t something that we really talked about.  But, I often sensed that she must have been a different person before Dave died.  I could tell that there was still a great sadness and that she missed him very much.  For most of the time I knew her, she slept on the couch, rather than to sleep in their bed.

I think about my own life.  At this point in time, I have no desire to ever be married again or even considering dating.  John was the love of my life and he still is and always will be.  John was a very special man- one in a million.  Honestly, I don’t think anybody else could ever compare and when you’ve had it good you don’t settle for second best.

At the same time, I do hesitate to say never.  But I do think that with confidence I can say, highly unlikely.  I think that John is probably it for me.  When you’ve had the love of your life, nobody else will ever compare.

John had told me that if I wanted to I could re-marry.  The man just had to be rich and handsome.  lol…  Leave it to John to always have a sense of humor.

I do feel with great confidence that John would want me to be happy and that he trusts me to do the right things and to always put Nathaniel first (while he’s growing up)  in any decisions that I make.

I hope to live a long time… hopefully at least another forty eight years… but, even though I may be alone, I don’t want to live in sadness.  I want to smile, enjoy life, enjoy my son, my horses, spend time with friends and family, and always fondly remember John.  Through some inner strength that I never knew I had, I think I’m doing okay with that most of the time.

I’ve learned, we never know how much time we have.  I think it is important to live each day to the fullest.  I don’t want to look back at my life and find that I wasted it with such nonsense as bad moods, hatred,  or grumpiness.  I hope that when I look back upon my life I will find that I had few regrets and can say that I lived a good life and was happy.

All that being said, back to the song…  I disagree with the last part of the song.  I don’t want John spending (hopefully) many years waiting outside Heaven’s gate.  I hope that he went right through the pearly white gates, checks on us from time to time, smiles at us, laughs at me like he always did, watches over us and protects us from harm, and I hope that he enjoys himself up there- watches the Ravens play from seats that are better than our club level PSLs (and helps them out from time to time), goes on fire calls (just good ones- no BS calls), and has lots of time to ride his bike (with the wind at his back and effortless climbing), and hopefully he’s getting all of his World of Warcraft out of the way now!

When my time comes, I hope he’ll come find me and that we can be together and that we can be just as happy (if not happier- it is Heaven after all)  up there as we were down here.  But for now… I don’t want him waiting alone outside…

I think back to the movie, “The Lake House.”  Where basically two people fall in love but are trapped in different times and not able to connect.  Or at least that’s how I THINK the movie went… I fell asleep and had to watch about 3 times on “on demand” before I was able to catch the whole movie… lol…

I don’t understand how the ‘whole heaven thing’ works, but I certainly hope he’s not trapped waiting for me while I’m trapped missing him.

I’ve not owned a macro lens before and this one came to me as a surprise, attached to an ‘untested’ camera I had one on eBay. It’s a nice lens, very sharp and able to get in really close on its subjects.

Headstone from the 1920s, All Saints, Swallowfield

Stain glass detail of the dragon, Hinton St George parish church

Shadow of the ivy, All Saints churchyard, Swallowfield

Scanned using an Epson V500 > ACR > PSE7

Az elmúlás és emlékezés európai kultúrkörbe ágyazott tárgya néhány rendhagyó hetet eleven budapesti helyszíneken tölt:

Látogass el bármelyik helyszínre és küldd be nekünk a legjobban sikerült fotót, csoportképet, készíts kollázst, gyújts mécsest vagy bármely más módon mutasd meg HOGYAN EMLÉKEZEL! e-mail: aivanka@ivanka.hu A legjobbakat közzétesszük!

St-Étienne, Köln, Pozsony, Tourcoing, Milánó, Palermo, Kortrijk, Bécs után végre itthon láthatod az IVANKA legújabb fejlesztését, a Maurer-Klimes Ákos és Kucsera Péter által tervezett SEEYOU Síremléket. Ess eső, hullj felevél. Állj meg elhaladó. Tapinthatod, megérinthet.

Helyszínek:

1. A Bazilika előtt, 1051 Budapest, Szent István tér

október 2.–november 4.

2. Gödör, 1051 Budapest, Erzsébet tér

október 2–11.

3. Iparművészeti Múzeum, 1091 Budapest, Üllői út 33-37.

október 5.–november 22.

K 14:00–18:00, Sz, P, Szo, V 10:00–18:00, Cs 10:00–22:00

AFTERLIFESTYLE – Stop for a minute and think about passing

In front of the Basilica / Gödör / Museum of Applied Arts
1051 Budapest, Szent István square/ 1051 Budapest, Erzsébet square/ 1091 Budapest, Üllői avenue 33-37.

After Saint-Étienne, Cologne, Bratislava, Tourcoing, Milan, Palermo, Kortrijk and Vienna, the most recent product of IVANKA, the SEE YOU headstone designed by Ákos Maurer-Klimes and Péter Kucsera is exhibited in Hungary, as well. The object of passing and remembrance can bee seen at three Budapest locations during this exceptional week. Send us your best photograph, prepare a collage or show us in any other way HOW YOU REMEMBER!

Organised by IVANKA

I believe gravestones are more than markers.I believe they are a tribute to our loved ones who have passed on.

The stone should show how much we love and respect that person. Good upkeep is a wonderful expression of that. Here at Gravestone Care I provide that respectful upkeep your loved one deserves.

Our first stop in Yorkshire was the fine city of Leeds. It reminded me a lot of Perth or Adelaide back in Australia.

The highlight of Leeds was the Art Gallery with some great modernist and surrealist stuff. We also checked out Amazon World, which was quite surreal in its self; cold and wet outside and tropical inside.

We went to check out SNO!zone, an indoor ski field at Xscape, Castleford. Exhausted by the flurry of energetic misspelling, we just sat and watched. It was pretty expensive but looked like fun – I miss going skiing. I managed to pick up a cheap Burton jumper at the ski shop, I wonder how anything survives there because it does look like a bit of a ghost town.

While in Leeds we stayed just outside at Maustin caravan park. There were nice toilets and showers (yay), no kids (double yay) and free WIFI (3 yays with a sprinkle of hurrah). This place gave us very high expectations for caravan parks around the UK, expectations that were consistently shattered after that point. Most other places either didn’t know what I was talking about or thought WIFI was some magical, limited resource that they could charge copious amounts of money for.

This was also where we met our adoptive Scottish family. More on them in the blog post about Edinburgh.

We took a walk down The Shambles in York amongst locals with peculiar accents whining about “bloody tourists”. I made sure to take extra photos in front of them and block their way on the footpath.

Shambolic

We purchased some tooth-stingingly sweet fudge and sat down to an indulgent Yorkshire cream tea.

Scone frenzy

We stayed overnight at a beautiful seaside town called Whitby. The ruins of the abbey were high on the hill overlooking the town.

The Abbey

There was also a small chapel with a bunch of ancient gravestones. Many were so eroded you couldn’t make out the inscription.

Graveyard

I pondered poignantly over how even the memory of your existence does not last forever, was nearly shat on by a giant seagull and then had some fish and chips.

Shitehawk!

As we sat down in the car, a bunch of the buggers came and perched on the bonnet. They tried to eat our chips through the windshield but were unsuccessful.

Winners of the Hungarian Design Awards, managed by the Hungarian Design Council, are announced for the 30th time this year. The prizes are awarded by a jury of acclaimed artists and experts in four categories – Product, Visual Communication, Concept and Student Work – for the most outstanding Hungarian design achievements. The exhibition containing some of the most outstanding entrants of the competition gives an insight into the most recent processes of Hungarian design culture.

october 5. 17.00 Museum of Applied Arts 1091 Budapest Üllői avenue 33-37.  Exhibition: October 5.–November 22. Open: Tue 14.00–18.00, Wed, Fri, Sat, Sun 10.00–18.00 Thu 10.00–22.00

Péter Kucsera, Ákos Maurer Klimes, András Rudolf Ivánka

Ivánka András és Dr.Manherz Károly felsőoktatási és tudományos szakállamtitkár

Award Winners 2009: Az Oktatási és Kulturális Minisztérium különdíja – Kulturális Szakállamtitkárság Special Award from the Ministry of Education and Culture – State Secretariat for Culture TERMÉK kategória PRODUCT category “SEEYOU” síremlék “SEEYOU” gravestone Alkotó / Designer : Maurer-Klimes Ákos, Kucsera Péter, Ivánka Katalin, Ivánka András Rudolf Gyártó / Manufacturer: IVANKA Beton

Péter Kucsera, Ákos Maurer Klimes,  Katalin Ivánka András Ivánka

The Hungarian Design Council celebrates the 30th anniversary of the foundation of the Hungarian Design Awards with an award ceremony and a poster exhibition.

Ezt egy életen át kell tervezni…
Magyar Formatervezési Díj 2009: kismamaruhától a sírkőig
Budapest, 2009. október 5. – A designszakma három évtizedes, legrangosabb hazai kitüntetését hat díjazott és négy különdíjas vette át ma délután az Iparművészeti Múzeumban. A három évtizedes múltra visszatekintő elismerés mellett most először mutatkozott be a Design Management Díj, mellyel a formatervezést céltudatosan alkalmazó intézményeket mutatja be a Díj alapítója, azaz a Magyar Formatervezési Tanács. A kerek évforduló alkalmából az Oktatási és Kulturális Minisztérium Életműdíjjal jutalmazta Király József belsőépítészt.
Magyar Formatervezési Díjasok 2009-ben
262 pályamunka, 4 kategória, 6 díjazott és 4 különdíjas. Ez a Magyar Formatervezési Díj 2009-es története számokban. A beérkezett pályázatok matematikai összesítéséből kiderül, hogy a termék, terv, vizuális kommunikáció és diákmunka kategóriák közül az első kettőben taroltak idén a pályázók (73, illetve 87 pályamunka), míg a vizuális kommunikáció területe (37 pályamunka) bizonyult a leginkább alulreprezentáltnak. A hazai tárgy- és formakultúra egy színes szeletét mutatja be a 2009-es Magyar Formatervezési díjazottak és különdíjasok palettája: a nyertesek között éppúgy megtaláljuk a kismamapocakot hangsúlyozó, de nemcsak a leendő anyukák által kedvelt és viselt Ille-Olle ruhákat, mint a fantáziadúsan “PILOP”-ra keresztelt készségfejlesztő gyermekjátékot. A Mediso Kft. nemzetközileg is elismert orvosi képalkotó műszere, az Any Scan és a 21. század egyik tabutémáját feldolgozó “Seeyou” design sírkő is bekerült a bírálóbizottság favoritjai közé. A formatervezőink élhetőbbé, élvezhetőbbé teszik az életünket a bölcsőtől a sírig: joggal állíthatjuk tehát, hogy a design elemei végigkísérik a mindennapjainkat. Ezt támasztja alá a Je Suis Belle legújabb, a téli erdő kuszasága inspirálta kollekciója, és ebbe a logikai menetbe jól illeszkedik az eScart is, ami egy több funkciós elektromos roller: közlekedhetünk vele, teherszállításra is alkalmas, de akár utánfutóként is csatlakoztathatják a kerékpározás szerelmesei. És ha már a közlekedésnél tartunk: egy műrepülő is helyet kapott a listán. A Corvus Racer 320 km/h-s sebességre képes, és a kifejlesztésében egyetemek és egy jól ismert hazai pilóta is aktívan részt vett. Az idei nyertesek között figyelemre méltó a tradíciókhoz való visszatérés. Jó példa erre egy kecskeméti kesztyűsmester portékáját népszerűsítő átgondolt csomagolás, vagy a Görömbei Luca nevével fémjelzett, kemencében olvasztott, majd kézzel csiszolt üvegelemek. A vizuális kommunikáció kategóriában a letisztult, fekete-fehér kombináción alapuló Merész Fotó arculata lett a zsűri kedvence.