Full story…

1. I need to pray for patience because being stuck at home is driving me crazy.

2. OWN Network really is feel good television, and I have since added some of the shows to my DVR schedule.

3. It has been a really LONG time since I had time to update my blog, so maybe I should take advantage of this unforeseen downtime!

At any rate, be safe if you are in the path of this BITCH! =)

But seriously, where did all the time go!?! Yes, I know. You were pack full of excitement! My only son graduated from high school, decided on a university,  and then changed his mind at the very last minute and went with his second-choice! (SN: damn you, Sandusky!) However, I have to admit that I am happy he decided to stay closer to home.

By the way, I’ll never forget that financially irresponsible 4th of July weekend that we spent with family in Atlantic City, but my back account is still not happy with you for that one! I could just weep thinking about it though.

On a much happier note, you brought  us all of those Olympic memories , and the Made In America concert without incident.

At the end of the day, I said all this to say, I’m gonna miss ya man! Granted, I’m still a little bitter because I thought I’d be an empty-nester before you ended, but honestly, I don’t think I was quite ready yet anyway…so all is forgiven.

Photo credit: MSNBC

It was normal—much like today—and I had just dropped my son off at school. I remember being kind of excited because it was my day off and I could spend the morning pretty much doing absolutely nothing. At the time, I was finishing up my Bachelor’s, and school had just started, so there wasn’t much homework yet. I was actually going to have some me time….or so I thought.
I hadn’t planned on going back to sleep because I wanted to savor my “me time”, so I mindlessly hit the power button to the remote and headed to the kitchen to wash the breakfast dishes. Now, keep in mind, 11 years ago, the news was still the news and not the sensationalism that it is today! So when I heard a voice that was vastly different than the normal newscaster’s voice, I somehow knew the special coverage required immediate attention.
Still, based strictly on the visual, I thought a random plane lost control and had hit the tower because the second plane was still airborne. So I remember hoping for the best of this freak accident…until I watched in awe as the second plane went crashing into the other tower. I immediately knew, along with everyone else, that this was something very different than just a freak accident.
Even though the television was still on, I still needed confirmation. I didn’t dare turn away from the television screen, but the newscaster’s voice became white noise as I reached for my phone, the landline—cellphones as the primary phone wasn’t commonplace at the time. I called my boss for some reason, (I was bartending a few nights a week at the time and “my boss” was also one of my best friends).
Friday’s wasn’t yet open, so I had to call a few times before I could get her to pick up. After about 3 or 4 tries she finally answered, I cut her off midway through the mechanical TGIFriday’s greeting, and yelled “Where are you in the restaurant?” She said she was in the office doing paperwork, I told her to go to the bar and turn on the television. It seemed as if it took her an eternity, which probably took longer because of her continuous inquisition as to “why????” the whole way. But the shock and awe of her silence, once I knew she was finally witnessing the same reality as I, was all the confirmation needed.
For some strange reason, until I could hear the shock and despair in someone else’s voice, I somehow thought it could still be a bad joke; however, I had to accept that the impossible could happen…and had just happened.

I didn’t move from in front of the television, or hang up the phone with her, until the school called me to pick up my son because school was being dismissed early.11 years later, I remember as if it was yesterday.

That school of thought worked until this morning when the subject surfaced again on a Philadelphia morning news show where a radio personality, (who will remain nameless because her ignorance doesn’t deserve a place on this platform), actually tried to justify onlookers being angry about one misplaced strand of hair that initiated “hairgate” in the first place. I don’t care to rehash her diatribe, but because she chose to speak for all Black women when she said that “they” expected Gabby’s hair to be something “better”, she has forced my hand. As a Black woman, who can speak for herself, I could care less if Gabby performed bald! She! Made! History! At 16!!!! What were you doing at 16?!

Gabby Douglas, a young Black woman herself, pretty much feels the same way because after learning about this idiotic debate she offered her own opinion: “I just made history and people are focused on my hair?’ It can be bald or short, it doesn’t matter about (my) hair.” She went on to say, ”Nothing is going to change. I’m going to wear my hair like this during beam and bar finals. You might as well just stop talking about it. I don’t think people should be worried about that,” she said. “We’re all champions and we’re all winners. I just say that it’s kind of, a stupid and crazy thought to think about my hair.”

I couldn’t agree more!

While watching this video of Natalie Hawkins, Gabby’s mother, I had to fight back tears! Raising an Olympian you did…

photo credit: Huffington Post

I know I am so late with acknowledging these amazing young women, but better late than never right? Besides if I had congratulated the “Fab Five” before today, I would have been ahead of their new viral video, “That’s What Makes You Flexible.” Too Cute! Congratulations Ladies!

Photo credit: msnbc

I know every parent has been in this position of watching their little prince or princess perform, but I still thought this picture was absolutely priceless! You could just feel the anxiety of Aly Raisman’s parents as they willed her to “stick it.” (Too cute!)

Happy Monday!

photo credit: Girl Tank

It’s movements like Girltank that make me long to be back in education! I absolutely love its mission, so I thought I would let you know about an employment opportunity if you are interested in working with Girltank!
The organization is seeking a creative associate who can start ASAP to assist with some of its projects. Based on the description, the position is unpaid but you never know what it may lead to. And if nothing else, you will be doing a good deed.
Feel free to read Madame Noire’s interview with the groups co-founder, Tara Roberts if you would like to know how she helped bring Girltank to fruition.

A New Mexico woman is auctioning off her soul, but I’m not really sure what she wants the buyer to do with it. And get this, the “soul” purchase even comes with a Carfax report.

Apparently, the woman was severely injured after being hit by a drunk driver years ago and her quality of life has suffered since that time. Honestly, I cannot help but be sympathetic towards the woman who’s “at the end of her rope” , but I don’t understand how this will help. Unless maybe it’s an attempt to bring awareness to her problem.

What do you think?

As of yesterday, I have to live off of $40 a week. And before I can purchase anything—unrelated to my business—I have to ask myself the following question: “Are you buying this because you need it or because you want it?” If my response would be “yes” to the latter, I cannot purchase said item.

This whole financial fiasco will probably make more sense if I explain its origin. So yesterday morning, my son and I were purchasing a few items to complete my mother’s, his grandmother’s, birthday gift before taking her out to breakfast. And as we were waiting in the drive-thru of Wells Fargo so I could get some cash, (because God forbid my son spend any of his money), he asked me if I was up for a savings challenge.

Intrigued, I asked “What kind of savings challenge?” He went on to explain that he’s trying to save as much money as possible so he wouldn’t have to claim the “broke college student” title for any part of his freshman semester that begins August 28^th.  He believes that if we treat it as a competition it would motivate us both to be serious. So, “After today, we cannot spend any money that we do not have to spend!” Without even a thought, I heard myself saying, “Yes!”

Although my inner Suze Orman was beaming with pride, I should have added a few provisions before agreeing. For instance, we are spending the 4^th of July in Atlantic City. How exactly can I spend four days in Atlantic City without incurring any “unnecessary” expenses? Maybe, if I could in good conscious find a way to chalk playing blackjack up to being a business expense I’d be okay, but I can’t.

Hell, I’m having a problem with the challenge already and it hasn’t even been 24 hours! I want to go get a pedicure. It’s sandal time! And if you’re not a woman, then I guess you just wouldn’t understand. But because I can’t honestly justify a pedicure being a real need, I will just have to give myself one—which sucks because I don’t have a massage chair and I don’t know how to do any of the little cute toe designs.

Needless to say, this is going to be a very interesting 65 days! It does have a bright side though because I plan to use my savings to pay off some credit card debt that has been accumulating since the 2008 recession. I am actually spending the better part of tomorrow morning calculating what I owe to my creditors.  This will be a project in itself because in my head, my credit card debt should be no more than $7000(don’t judge me). But if it’s more than that, the wine I purchase will be logged as a NEED!

If you know anything about driving in Philadelphia, you know that 95 is not to be toyed with between the hours of 4:00 p.m. to 6:00 p.m. But no problem, the happy hour event started at 5:30 p.m., so I planned to head toward the venue around 3:30ish to avoid the traffic headache.

Well, it’s a good thing I didn’t get paid for planning this idea! In normal true Monday fashion something came up and I didn’t finish work until nearly 5 o’clock. I was bummed, but I decided to just use the time I was going to spend at the event, on actually viewing her first show.

Before I get into what I actually thought of the show, I was a little worried because when I looked on my DVR schedule I noticed that her show premiered in the same time slot as The View. Now, if the ladies of The View were on hiatus for the summer, like her talk show mentor Ellen, I could understand premiering a sneak peek show at this time…they are not. That said, I am still a little confused by her time slot, but I digress. Now, on to the show.

One of the things I love about Bethenny is that even though she’s had incredible success in the last few years with her Skinnygirl empire, I still view her as an underdog. I am always a fan of the underdog! Not to mention how real she is! Bethenny is so real that I stopped viewing Bethenny Ever After before the finale this season because the fights between her and Jason were painful to watch. (Btw, I never believed the divorce rumors)

For the fans who may have been swayed by the media, she pretty much opened the show clearing up the divorce rumors by stating that she and Jason are committed to staying together, which I’m happy about. However, I still don’t want Bethenny Ever After to return…sorry Bethenny.

I loved the new talk show though! Mostly, the Vanessa Williams interview, (I included part of it in this post). The sex talks were a bit much, but Bethenny’s nervousness, which I’m sure was just the result of it being her first show was what I loved most about the show. It’s nervous laughter and things like talking too fast, and cutting people off that make her so relatable and authentic!

What did you guys think of the show?

Don’t you just love dogs?

Now, back to Mr. Andre (Dr. Dre)Young! One of the items on my son’s list is Beats by Dr. Dre, um, call me crazy, but I didn’t know they garnered a price tags that hovers around $299.00! WOW!

Honestly, I don’t know what I expected them to cost, and considering I walk a fine line between being frugal and downright cheap, I fail to understand why the headphones cost so much.

However, I’m sure Dr. Dre, and the Beats stakeholders could care less that I will NOT spend nearly $300.00 on headphones because I’m not their target market.

Speaking of marketing, it was genius, as it relates to the Beats brand. Did you know that HTC paid over $300 million for a 51% share in the company!?! Damn, Dre…(Read More)

At any rate, I wouldn’t trade being a small-business owner for anything—stress and all. Besides, I can’t think of any stress free careers, so if you are going to have stress anyway, shouldn’t you be doing what you love? Of course you should!

When I decided to open Bring-to-Fruition, I expected stress and fear to be par for the course. So I knew I would have to find productive ways to “do it afraid” and ways to manage my stress. I have created myriad ways to deal with stress, but exercise—mostly cardio—keeps my head clear so I am able to focus on the challenges at hand.

Because we all have unique ways to win the battle against stress, I thought it would be interesting to see how a few extremely successful people micromanage stress.

photo credit: Planet Fashion TV

Sara Blakely, the creator of Spanx, believes you should “Hire your weaknesses.” Now granted, Blakely, didn’t actually say delegating responsibilities was a way she handles stress, but I definitely wanted to include her in this post. And I can all but guarantee that hiring Laurie Ann Goldman, a branding expert, because Blakely wasn’t exactly business savvy, did alleviate stress.

Madonna screams a lot. I have never tried this approach, but screaming your head off probably would relieve stress, huh?

photo credit: Oprah.com

Last but certainly not least, Oprah, one of my all-time favorite people, uses Transcendental Meditation to deal with stress. I’m not familiar with this kind of meditation, but I have tried “normal” meditation. It didn’t work though; I couldn’t turn my mind off to really relax, so I gave up.

How do you manage your stress?

Can I get mad at her for telling the truth? Of course not! My friend is absolutely right, I still SUCK at my work/life balance. Hell, I haven’t even updated my blog for nearly a week, so I can’t even hide it from you. (lol)

I will have you know though, I’m doing a little better this week. Yet and still, I’ve decided to blame my work/life balance struggle on Oprah! You all know that if “The Oprah Show” was still on the air, the majority of her shows would be dedicated to empowering women. And I know she would have had more than enough experts sitting on her iconic couch providing epiphanies directly related to life balance.

Well, even though “The Oprah Show” is no longer around to help me navigate this problem, I still have the “O Magazine” website to turn to for an impromptu “Aha Moment.” So for some afternoon tongue in cheek humor, I decided to see what Oprah’s site suggested I do to create my work/life balance.

“Feeling like your life is out of balance? Too much work on your plate? Too many demands from your family? No time to do it all—let alone do it well or steal an hour of ‘you time’?”

I’m sure you can tell from the last paragraph that Oprah’s website didn’t fail me.  I only typed “creating work life balance” into the search box and was immediately directed to “Balancing Your Career and Family”. The article was penned in 2006, but it has an evergreen feel to it, so I’ll see if the advice really works. Continue reading if you want to join in on the fun. Read More...

Honestly, I am a little bias because I LOVE Pinterest! However, it is such a time suck, but now I set a timer that goes off after thirty minutes to remind me to get back to work! If I’m focused on my bottom line though, this insight would also result in my choice being Pinterest.  There is just so much value in sharing resources, so although I think some of the other companies like Pinwheel and Airtime have promise, they could very easily be merge with other existing organizations. I feel the same way about Square, so my money is on Pinterest!  Read more…

photo credit: Psychology Today

Even though Moms run the world, it always seems like our kids, husbands, or work is running us. Well on Mother’s Day you are the only priority on your To-Do list! In fact, burn the damn To-Do list! And if the chaos of life has you out of pamper practice, here are 5 ways to get YOU back on track.

1. Indulge! On Mother’s Day, don’t you dare count calories. Actually, Sunday is my “cheat” day anyway, so I kind of feel cheated because Mother’s Day always falls on a Sunday…but I digress. If food or sweets are not your indulgence of choice, feel free to have a spa day.
2. Create a peace corner. When I worked in the Philadelphia School District, I would always create a peace corner for students to take a little time out when they needed it. But children aren’t the only ones who need a time out. So, visit your favorite Barnes & Noble and pick up a copy of 50 Shades of Grey, Let It Go, or all of your favorite gossip magazines and hide in your newly created peace corner. Don’t forget your journal and a glass of wine.
3. Make it a Netflix day. If reading seems too much like a chore, you can always make it a Netflix day.  Better yet, treat yourself to an actual movie at the theater. Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man was pretty funny!
4. Sleep. Sleep. Then sleep some more. I have a few new mothers as customers, and I know one of them is experiencing baby blues. The latter can be kept at bay in some instances by getting more sleep, according to UCSD experts. However, this is easier said than done, but it should be on Mother’s Day. Just tell your family to keep their money and reward you with a day off.
5. Splurge on beauty products. I love, love, love new lip gloss, mascara, and fingernail polish, but I am a bargainista, so my “splurge” may be defined a little different than yours. No need to fear, Oprah may not have a daily show anymore, but she always has someone at her magazine put a product list together. Feel free to splurge on some of the beauty products that received an O-Ward.

Personally, this is the first Mother’s Day where the matriarch of our family will not be physically present. My grandmother died two months ago, so I purposefully filled my schedule in the hope that I will not think about her too much. To be honest, I really think I did it to not dwell on Mother’s Day memories I took for granted when she was still here. However, the majority of my day will be spent celebrating other mothers in my life who are still here.

But when finished, I plan to have my own personal celebration.  I am going to finish Kristen Johnston’s book, Guts. She is so funny! Also, I need to finish Steve Job’s biography, which I’ve been meaning to finish since Valentine’s Day. I will then cap the night off viewing Jada Pinkett Smith’s Red Table Talks’ with a glass of wine in hand.

How are you celebrating Mother’s Day?

My son is just itching to spend his savings on his first car. Trust me, I GET IT! I can still remember purchasing my first lemon, I mean car. It was a fire engine red 2-door Ford Escort, and I loved that car with every ounce of my being. But in all honesty—it was a piece of junk!

The passenger window would only go half way up, it was a stick shift that had a seizure type episode anytime it was put in fifth gear, and it always needed a 10 minute startup prep session—not matter the season. Yet and still, I had an unconditional love for that car until it died, leaving me stranded, on the side of the road in the middle of nowhere.

Don’t get me wrong, I do want my son to have his own first car war stories, but we are relocating to the Midwest at the end of August, so I am pleading with him to just wait until we move to buy a car. Maybe I’m wrong, but I very seriously doubt if a $2000 car will survive a nearly 1000 mile road trip. Not saying it isn’t possible, but I’m being realistic—and I am a prisoner of optimism.

Even though I know I am right, we have been having this first car debate for about three weeks now. I get that he wants to try on his independence by making his first real purchase, but I really don’t understand why our children cannot just learn from our mistakes.

Granted, there were times when I received, what I now know to be, award winning advice that I treated as some sort of white noise. And if I had only listened to some of that advice that was soaked with wisdom and practice, I would have save myself some heartache. And while it’s true that pioneered experience also serves well as a teacher, I really wish he would listen to me on this one.

According to Jay McGraw, Dr. Phil’s son, I am supposed to discuss the reasoning behind my decision of wanting him to wait, in the hope that he will heed the advice, which I did. Didn’t work! I then made him create a pros and cons chart, which he manipulated in his favor. So, you know what? I am raising the white flag and I’ll allow experience to have her way with him.

I know my son is still a novice at life, and I am not naïve enough to believe that I will prevent every mistake he will make, but is my job to try and limit them. I can sleep well tonight knowing that I tried to do exactly that, but my gut tells me that I’ll get my chance to say, “I told you so.”

How are your teens at taking advice?

I love Jada Pinkett Smith, and I cannot wait to see the exchange between her and her family. Not so much in a “newsy” type of way, but in an “our stories are similar” kind of way.

It is so important that kids see celebrities as people who are really no different than they are, and I believe that’s the approach of the Red Table Series, well…based on the sneak peek.

While working in the Philadelphia School District, I would always integrate Smith’s children’s book, Girls Hold Up This World,  into our Media Literacy projects in an effort to boost self-esteem.

I’m sure Red Table will be a great way to end my Mother’s Day! Can’t Wait!

As of yet, Bailey has not heard from Perry. In fact, she does not even know if he is aware the billboard exists. But even if she never hears from Tyler Perry, spending her last $1500 on the billboard may have been a very wise investment.

At the very least, Bailey’s story has been given some legs. It has been covered by quite a few news outlets, and she even scored an Essence interview. Granted, she may never be Perry’s “leading lady”, but she’s bound to, at least, find work.

Jobseekers should borrow a page out of Bailey’s book. Hiring managers and recruiters receive countless resumes for job openings. When I was a Site Director for a youth organization; one of my responsibilities was hiring the instructors for the program. I received hundreds of resumes to fill 7 positions. So in an effort to save time, the first time we scanned through resumes, we didn’t look for reasons to keep them; we looked for reasons to reject resumes. Meaning, if there were any typos, ridiculous fonts, manufactured objective statements, or too many pages–your resume was headed straight to the shredder.

When trying to secure a position, the best job advice I received—that actually worked—came from Tony Beshara by way of a Dr. Phil episode. Of course, being the sucker that I am, I ordered his book, The Job Search Solution, after watching him on the show. However, using his advice, I secured quite a few interviews.

I don’t remember every jewel from the book verbatim, but basically, he suggested that you do what Racquel Bailey did and think outside the box. For instance, if I knew of a position that I was interested in; instead of taking the usual route and submitting a resume and cover letter like everyone else. Research the company a little bit until you find the name and contact information of the person responsible for the department you want to work in. When I would find it, I sent my resume and a personalized email directly to that person.

This practice worked about 70% of the time, and even when I sent the resume to the wrong contact, I would always get a response from the person, who would then point me in the right direction. I was HAM-bitious!

What is the craziest thing you ever did to get noticed?