Anyways, in case you don’t know about the Harvard-Yale Regatta, it is the oldest intercollegiate sporting event in the United States. They started racing each other in 1852 which, for those of you who know your US History, was before the Civil War began. With the exception of not racing during times of war when the US was fighting, the race – “The Race” – has been run every year since 1859. Initially it was rowed on Lake Winnipesaukee in New Hampshire but it’s more permanent home is on the Thames River in New London, CT. (Unlike the river that runs through London, England, this one is not pronounced “Tems”. It is in fact pronounced just as it’s spelled.) There are two campsites along the river that act as the training grounds for each team and where they bunker down for a week or more to prepare to race each other. Yale is at Gales Ferry and Harvard is at Red Top. There are four races all together – the varsity (4 miles), junior varsity (3 miles), freshman (2 miles), and combination (2 miles), which is a boat comprised of rowers from the 3V8+ and 2F8+. The winners of the combination race earn the right to paint their team’s colors on the rock at Bartlett’s Cove the next day, which also happens to be the most popular spot to watch the races as they come down the river (as evidenced by this picture from yesterday).
Harvard is currently sitting atop the leader boards with an impressive 94-54 record, having won the varsity race for the last six consecutive years and 13 of the last 14.

I can’t remember if I’ve posted this video previously but I think it gives a good look at the regatta, it’s history, and the traditions surrounding the week leading up to the race.

Now, this is some Woodward and Bernstein level shit. My mind is blown; they may as well be selling birth control during Lent instead of delicious snacks. But now the can of worms is open. Who else is hiding something? Here are a few that I’ve uncovered through assorted nefarious channels.

ESPN3 was originally launched as a YTMND joke to run persistent loops of Stuart Scott saying “Booyah!”

This plan was scrapped when ESPN discovered it would be cheaper to use the network for NHL and MLL games than to pay royalties to Scott.

The reason Fox is cancelling House is because Hugh Laurie actually developed an opioid addiction.

In a case of life imitating art the television star took his method acting to the extreme by intentionally breaking his fibula after season four of House and forcibly becoming dependent on prescription pain medication. During the season six detox arc Laurie quit he pills cold turkey and nearly died from the withdrawal symptoms.

The League of Nations still exists as an underground rap community.

The group, “disbanded” after World War II, has switched gears from peacekeeping to music.

The Harvard-Yale Regatta has a pre-determined outcome.

The winner of the annual rowing race is actually decided weeks in advance via a chairman vs. chairman beer pong game. The truly unfortunate part of this is all of the money I have wasted betting on something whose competitive spirit is on par with the WWE.

Brad Pitt is playing us all.

Consider this: Brad Pitt played Billy Beane in Moneyball. He also played the alter-ego of Edward Norton in Fight Club. Edward Norton is a friend of Cal Ripken Jr. Cal Ripken Jr. is a member of the Baseball Hall of Fame, along with Joe Morgan. Joe Morgan thinks that Billy Beane wrote Moneyball. Brad Pitt is Billy Beane, so Brad Pitt wrote Moneyball and then portrayed himself in it. Brad Pitt.