Hi There,

Well I hope your day has gone as great as mine . I have been having way too much fun. Actually it all started yesterday, when we had our family  Christmas. It was good to see the fam, and meet my little (she’s 15) nieces boyfriend (he’s 18!). Food was good except we forgot that we were supposed to bring the mashed potatoes (ooops).

After we came home and chilled for a while, we went to night service at the church. It was an awesome service! But right before the service started our friend, whose brother is working on our roof, asked for prayer. Seems friends’ brother slipped on a book while in our attic, and cut his leg. And now…it’s infected. So no working on our roof for him, for a while.

So anyways, this morning my little brother and I got up on our roof and finished laying the tar paper on it. By “got up on our roof”, I mean that it was only accomplished with fear and trembling. A lot of it. I am afraid of heights, any type of heights, so let’s just say it was a challenge. I got almost to the top of the ladder and froze, literally.  It was only after a few pep talks from my little brother, a lot of prayer, a lot of shaking, a little crying, and I made it up and down from the roof. I was actually shaking by the time I made it down.

That was just the start of my day. After wards came a birthday lunch for our adopted Grandma, at our favorite Italian restaurant. Then home to clean up after a busy weekend. I am now catching up on some writing, as I watch Christmas In Connecticut.  Well anyways like I said, I sincerely hope you are having as great a day as I have had.

Peace Out My Homies,

Helen Heard

Welcome to the eighth in my series of 10 blog posts. Stick with me for all 10 steps, and you’ll be armed with all of the information you need to get out there and purchase a home.

Step 8 Get Insurance

We wouldn’t drive our cars without insurance, right?

Most of us get health insurance to cover the doctor’s bills, right?

So why wouldn’t you insure your home? This is the biggest investment you’ll probably ever make. You need to protect it.

There are several types of insurance involved in purchasing a home.

Title insurance: This is paid for, typically, with an up-front fee at the time of closing. A title insurance policy protects the purchasers against any defects in the title (ownership) of the home. This compensates buyers for any damages resulting from undiscovered claims against the home’s ownership. A “lender’s policy” covers the amount of the mortgage. An “owner’s policy” covers that amount as well as the amount of the down payment.

Homeowner’s insurance: This type of policy covers fire, theft, and liability. Lenders require this coverage when you take out a home loan. It not only protects their investment in the home, but it protects your property. Many items can be covered under homeowner’s insurance; wedding rings, office equipment, and furniture for example.

Flood insurance: Generally required in high-risk flood-plane areas, this insurance is issued by the federal government and provides as much as $250,000 in coverage for a single-family home plus $100,000 for contents. Ask your Realtor if your chosen home is in a flood-plain and what choices in flood insurance exist.

Home warranty: Not necessarily an insurance plan in itself, a home warranty protects the purchaser in the event that things start to break in the home. Home warranties bought from third parties by home builders are generally designed to provide several forms of protection: workmanship for the first year, mechanical problems such as plumbing and wiring for the first two years, and structural defects for up to 10 years. Home warranties are typically 1-year service plans bought by the seller. If, within that year, something were to break that was covered under the warranty, the warranty company would step in and take care of it.

Your Realtor can point you in the right direction when it comes to getting information on home insurance. A good insurance broker can access rate quotes from several different companies and put together the best coverage that will meet your needs.

Now that you’ve learned how to protect this sizable investment, you’re ready to close on it! Come back next time and we’ll talk about getting your keys and moving on in!

I have now completed what I set out to do – face 100 fears in 100 days. You can check out The Awesome-ness of Fear to see how it all began. The last 10 days were especially important to me. Here’s day 91, 92, 93, 94, and  95.

My last ten fears that were faced…

Rats, truth, death, needles & heights coming in @ 10,9,8,7,6!

#10 FEAR OF RATS!

I don’t know who the jerk was in Halifax that told me degus were in the rat family because believe me, after holding a degu and now a rat, those two are nothing alike. Rats are vile. I thought degus were actually cute for a moment. There wasn’t a sliver of even a millisecond that I thought this rat was cute, cuddly, or any other synonym which portrays anything positive about the dirty rodents with skin tails. Just imagine a skin tail!!!! This fear only made me want to go shower after facing it. If we’re being completely honest, I never even got to hold the thing on my own, that’s how frightened I was and the lady thought I’d throw the thing on the floor and that’d be the last she’d see of it… whatever is what I have to say to her!! So I touched a rat.

#9 FEAR OF SPEAKING OUT

I’ve been liking the tangible fears that really give me this shot of instant adrenaline, like holding a rat/touching a rat, but then there’s that rush I get for sticking up for myself, speaking out, or just saying something I’d usually keep my tongue tied on. I value friendships, relationships in general really are very important to me, but there are most definitely times where I hold my tongue rather than speaking my truth. Perhaps I think it might be easier that way, or I don’t like confrontation, or I’m afraid my friend won’t like what I have to say. Why I don’t speak up all the time is beyond me. Of course there will be times when holding your tongue is the right thing to do, but when someone mistreats you, say something! They’re not worth it if you two can’t work through the argument. Arguments are healthy. It’s impossible to never have differing views on a topic and that’s okay. Point of reference – if you’re fighting all the time, maybe some self reflection and honesty with yourself might be in order, because that’s not healthy either, but an argument here and there is most definitely a good thing. Standing up for yourself is even better!

#8 FEAR OF DEATH

Perhaps morbid, but it is a fear of mine. I think it’s a fear in all of us. It forever looms over each of us, affects us all, and touches us at one point or another. It’s bizarre that every minute of every day death is touching someone, some way, somehow, and yet the world goes on, just as it did. I think that’s the hard part. Life goes on and we’re left to somehow unravel a way to continue on with our lives with this gaping hole, in a way we won’t forget our loved one. There’s no method for grievance, no preparing us for the inevitable, it’s a matter of life we’re all left to face. If I am able to prolong someone’s life, or even save it, I will. Today I signed up for One Match, a stem cell and marrow network.

A landmark moment for One Match from One Match’s website:

“2007 marks a major shift for the Unrelated Bone Marrow Donor Registry. Bone marrow is the home of ’stem cells’ which are the building blocks of blood itself. However, stem cells are also found in the peripheral blood stream (circulating blood) and in umbilical cord blood.

Canadian Blood Services supports the collection of stem cells from both the peripheral blood stream and bone marrow. Therefore, to better reflect the changes in stem cell donation and increase awareness and recognition of the organization, the Unrelated Bone Marrow Donor Registry is renamed OneMatch Stem Cell and Marrow Network.”

#7 FEAR OF NEEDLES

I gave blood today. I don’t know why it hasn’t become easier for me. Look at me, already making people nervous to give blood. In all honesty, it’s not a big deal at all; pretty sure it’s just a psychological thing, but it’s mind over matter, as I always say PLUS you get juice boxes and cookies! What could be better? Canadian Blood Services is an amazing organization with some unbelievable people who work for them. They are sure to make you feel comfortable the whole way through, whether it’s your first time giving blood, or your hundredth time giving blood. Their tag line is bang on, It’s in your to give, and it’s in such need. I’m still a little embarrassed to say that it took someone very close to me to be blood transfusion dependent before I starting giving blood, but I suppose it is one of those things, you don’t think about until you’re directly affected. My cousin Matt is this remarkable individual who was blood transfusion dependent and I think he is fearless. Facing the fear of needles is the smallest of support I can lend and I will, again and again. Please read the letter Matt wrote just over a year ago -HERE-. Save a life.

#6 FEAR OF HEIGHTS

Promise we looked cooler than that and didn’t even have a guide!!

This was amazing! My poor friend Dragana, who is deathly afraid of heights, being the good friend she is came along with me to face this fear! We went to a high ropes course in London where we got strapped in, then let loose at 40 feet in the air. If you’re unfamiliar with high ropes, think suspended obstacle course/tight rope walking; in other words, awesomeness. Before getting up there I wouldn’t have said I was afraid of heights, but many were quick to tell me, the fear of heights is actual innate (perhaps why bungee jumping and sky diving are still in business ?!), we’re all afraid of heights when it comes down to it! I’d highly recommend checking out high ropes for anyone and everyone! No pun intended! Mind you, the guys who work there might chirp you if you go slow… yes, they chirped me because those asshole 8 year olds were showing me up. Kids are fearless, ugh to be them!!

My last 5 fears that I faced are coming soon!!

@5,4,3,2,1 we’ve got embarrassment, cooking, spiders, ugliness, and singing in public… OH BOY!

The angels sing to shepherds to tell them of the Messiah’s birth. Luke 2.14 records the multitude of heaven’s army in Greek as:

Angels and shepherds from Cambodia

δόξα ἐν ὑψίστοις θεῷ
καὶ ἐπὶ γῆς εἰρήνη
ἐν ἀνθρώποις εὐδοκίας.

There has been a little trickle from Jim West’s blog via clayboy about how best to translate the song. Most of the problem is focused on the very last letter, the sigma, which is missing from the Majority Text. You can see the difference if you compare the NRSV translation (with final sigma) to the KJV (without):

NRSV
Glory to God in the highest heaven,
and on earth peace among those whom he favours.

KJV
Glory to God in the highest,
and on earth peace,
good will toward men.

Apart from the NRSV’s attempt at gender neutrality, the main difference is that the lack of final sigma forces the hymn into three phrases: glory, peace, good will. With the sigma, ‘favoured’ ‘men’ (of ‘good will’) get ‘peace’; without it, ‘men’ get ‘favour’/'good will’. The sigma changes the case of the word εὐδοκία (eudokia) from the nominative to the genitive case, making it belong to ‘men’ rather than being done to them. The trend of scholarship is that the ‘best witnesses’ have that final sigma, and there’s little more than can be said on that issue, except that a poet would tell you the three-line version sounds better.

I find it more interesting to look at a couple of correspondences in the Greek that don’t come through in most translations. The first word, δόξα (doxa), is the root of the last word, εὐδοκίας (eudokias), but if the latter is translated as ‘favoured’ or ‘of good will’ it no longer bears a reference to the ‘glory’ of the former. This top-and-tailing is characteristic of inclusio, a poetic structure used extensively in the Psalms, in which the focus/point comes in the middle of the text and is surrounded by a number of layers of paired, balanced phrases before and after. So, I would like to see a translation that connects the two. Although ‘glory’ is the standard translation of δόξα, that English word cannot be modified to cover εὐδοκία, so I would suggest the coupling of ‘praise’ with ‘well-praised’ or ‘praiseworthy’.

The other couplet that should be given some balance is that between the phrases ἐν ὑψίστοις (en hypsistois) and ἐν ἀνθρώποις (en anthrōpois). The obvious connection is the sound balance (en 2syls.-ois), which comes from their identical grammatical construction (prep. + dative plural). There’s a strong theological dualism between them: we have ‘heights’ and ‘humanity’. It would help in translation if we could use the same preposition in English to reflect the link, and I think ‘among’ is the best choice (‘to’ and ‘towards’, in that they suggest motion, should be avoided). So, I’m tending a bit more towards this translation:

Praise to God among the heights,
and on earth peace among praiseworthy humanity.

I have wondered whether the translation of θεῷ (theō), ‘to God’, being anarthrous, could be translated adjectivally as it probably should be in Acts 7.20 and II Corinthians 10.4. As a syriacist, I’m always interested to see how the Syriac biblical tradition has translated this:

.ܬܫܒܘܚܬܐ ܠܐܠܗܐ ܒܡܪܘ̈ܡܐ
ܘܥܠ ܐܪܥܐ ܫܠܡܐ܂
ܘܣܒܪܐ ܛܒܐ ܠܒܢܝ ܐ̱ܢܫ̈ܐ܀

Teshbuhta l-Alaha ba-mraume,
w-`al ar`a shlama
w-sabra taba la-bnai-nasha.

Glory to God in the heights,
and on earth peace
and good will to humanity.

This reinforces the Majority Text reading, traditional translations, and goes against my understanding of what the Greek might be suggesting. Within Luke’s gospel, this short hymn has a near parallel when Jesus enters Jerusalem in Luke 19.38. It repeats the phrase δόξα ἐν ὑψίστοις (doxa en hypsistois) and the word εἰρήνη (eirēnē), but the manuscript tradition is a little confused over it.

Peace and good will!

Welcome to the seventh in my series of 10 blog posts. Stick with me for all 10 steps, and you’ll be armed with all of the information you need to get out there and purchase a home.

Step 7: Make an Offer

So you’ve found your dream home and you’ve found a way to pay for it. Now what? Do you walk up to the seller with a check, tell him to wrap it up, and leave with your bright, shiny new house? Unfortunately, no, it’s not that easy. There is a process to follow. A good Realtor can guide you through it and make sure you understand what you’re doing.

Real estate contracts have a good deal of legalese involved with them. In the state of Tennessee, the standard real estate contract is 9 pages long. Not only does it name the price to be paid, but it outlines the terms out the deal. It provides deadlines for financing and inspections as well as contingencies that allow the buyer to back out of the deal if certain conditions are met (for example, the house is about to fall down.)

How much should I offer? Well, that depends on a myriad of factors. What is the condition of the house? What are similar homes in that neighborhood selling for? What is the seller’s situation. How much can you afford? The list goes on. That’s why it’s important to have a Realtor. He or she can counsel you on the market statistics, find out about the seller’s situation, and consult with you to develop the best strategy for getting you the most home for the least money.

To make an offer, you simply go out and find the house you want and then draw up the contract with your Realtor. They should go through it with you step by step and make sure you understand EVERYTHING. This is a very important document. You have to understand that by submitting the offer, you are legally binding yourself to purchase that property should the seller accept your offer. Along with the offer, you would typically send a check for a somewhat significant amount of money to show your willingness to purchase the home. This check will be applied to the purchase of the home. If you were unwilling to carry out the terms outline in it, you would be in default; meaning you’d probably lose that earnest money and you may even be sued!

The contract also sets up timelines for when things have to be accomplished such as loan applications and inspections. The closing date will also be specified in the contract. You’ve got to be on top of these deadlines, because failure to meet them will again result in default. We don’t want you losing your money and the house! Don’t fret, however, because a good Realtor won’t let that happen.

The next important step in this series involves you protecting your investment. Stay tuned for Step 8:Get Insurance.

Welcome to the sixth in my series of 10 blog posts. Stick with me for all 10 steps, and you’ll be armed with all of the information you need to get out there and purchase a home.

Step 6: Get Funding

This is a big purchase; probably the biggest you’ll ever make. How are you going to pay for it? Well, unless you have one or two hundred grand sitting in the bank, you’re going to finance it! Let’s not be afraid, everybody does it. The trick to successfully navigating the home financing process is knowing all your options! A good Realtor will talk to you about your options and put you in contact with a knowledgeable lender who can take you through the process and get you the best loan with the best terms.

What Kind of Loan?

There are all kinds of home loans available. Many factors determine what kind of loans you’ll qualify for:

How much do you plan to put down? If you can afford to put 20% down on a home, then you’ll probably go with a conventional home loan on the remaining 80%. If you can’t put that much down, the bank will require some outside assurance that you won’t skip out on the deal. This usually comes in the form of a VA Home Guaranty (if you’re a qualifying veteran,) an FHA loan, or private mortgage insurance. With an FHA loan you can put down as little as 3.5%. With a VA loan, you can get away with putting nothing down!

How is your credit? The better your credit, the better your rates and terms. To get the best loans, make sure you keep up with your credit report to make sure that there are no errors on it. Also, keep your credit card balances low and pay all of your bills on time.

Are you a first-time home buyer? For most programs, first-time home buyers are defined as those who haven’t owned a house within the past 3 years. Many states have special programs and incentives to help first timers buy a home with little down-payment money.

How do I get a loan?

A good Realtor will have you talk to a lender before you even go out and look at homes. The lender will complete a pre-qualification process with you that will tell you exactly how much you can afford. He or she will also outline all of your closing costs, necessary paperwork, etc. The will give you a qualification letter that you can use when submitting offers. Sellers love qualified buyers. After you submit an offer on a home and get it under contract, you’ll be going back to that lender (or another if you’ve been shopping around) and actually applying for that loan. It is important to get that process underway immediately because there are several steps involved in it.

Now that we’ve armed ourselves with a reliable source of funding (via a pre-qualification letter,) we’re ready to make an offer on that perfect home you may have stumbled upon during your search! (Step 7: Make an Offer)

Free call pick up and delivery.

No contracts required. One-time service / weekly service / monthly service (your choice).

Up to 50 Items of Clothing. Any of the following items: shirts, jeans,pants, skirts, blouses, dresses, linens, etc.

Please call 561-290-0432

Currently servicing:

Boca Raton
Delray Beach
Hillsboro Beach
Pompano Beach
Deerfield Beach
Coral Springs
Coconut Creek
Parkland
West Boca
Lauderdale Lakes
Wilton Manors
East Fort Lauderdale

Does not include:  South and West Broward, North Palm Beach or Miami.

No checks, please.

Well, it’s been a week since (what just may be) our annual snowfall here in Houston. Personally, I enjoyed the day and took some time off to walk around in the snow while it lasted. A good friend and I even got together that evening to play Christmas carols and some other tunes on 19th Street in the Heights for their annual “Holiday on 19th” celebration. We a blast playing for strangers in the holiday spirit and attracted quite a crowd of singers and dancers. Unfortunately, the overall turnout was a bit down from its usual commotion. I guess people didn’t want to risk it out there on the roadways. Oh well, better safe than sorry, I suppose…

I hope everyone had a great time nevertheless, and a wonderful holiday season. Merry Christmas!

Welcome to the fourth in my series of 10 blog posts. Stick with me for all 10 steps, and you’ll be armed with all of the information you need to get out there and purchase a home.

Step 4: Look at Homes

There is no shortage of homes on the market, especially right now. Millions of homes are sold each year. With so many choices, the challenge comes in finding the right property for your specific needs.

The housing market is complicated. The inventory is constantly in flux; new homes come on the market at all times of the day. Also, homes are put under contract and taken off the market in the same fashion. It’s like trying to hit a moving target. The best way to find what you need is to work with a good Realtor.

Know what you’re looking for! Homes are more than just a collection of bedrooms and bathrooms. Make sure your Realtor asks a lot of questions about exactly what you need in a home. You don’t want to waste your time looking at homes that don’t suit your needs.

Although there are plenty of homes on the market, there is not always one that fits your every desire exactly. It’s important to prioritize your needs. Would you trade a bedroom for a bigger kitchen? Would you trade a shorter commute for a bigger lot and a lower price?

Location, location, location! Every neighborhood has a unique feel about it. There are different types of homes, different people, and different environments to consider. You should make sure that your prospective neighborhood is a good fit for you. Neighbors make much better friends than enemies!

So how do you find the right house? Work with a Realtor! Realtors have real-time access to the local real estate inventory, as well as much more powerful tools to use in the search for your perfect home. A good Realtor can also set you up with valuable services to keep you up to date with what’s available.

Give me a call at (615)336-6638 and I’d be happy to help you find the perfect home!

Beginning this Friday, December 11, at 7:00 p.m. at University Heights Baptist Church, “From Cradle to Cross” will be presented.  The greatest story ever told is shared this year by an WWII  soldier at the Battle of the Bulge.   Having been mortally wounded, he is able to share the story of Jesus with the medic who comes to his aid.  Little did that medic know, this was a divine appointment and he needed that wounded soldier to help heal his soul.

The production has five performances thoughout the weekend.  Check www.uhbc.net for more information.

Here are some of the images you will see:

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Come experience the birth, life, death and resurrection of Jesus!  You will leave changed!

I think everyone is afraid of something. Some are afraid of spiders,  ghost, in the  dark, and etc.  Me? I have this disease called Acrophobia.

Acrophobia  is another fairly common fear, that of heights. I envy
those men who work on tall buildings, those people who can dare bungee jumping and sky diving, and all those people who are like Spiderman.
I am terrified of standing on the curb! And even watching this image gave me creeps.

When my friends invited me to go ziplining in Dahilayan Park, Bukidnon, I was excited and at the same time, nervous. I don’t want them to know that I’m afraid of heights, because I’m afraid that they will make fun of me.
The place was beautiful and breath-taking, it makes the rocky and dusty trip worthwhile. The place was full of pine trees, it reminds me of Baguio.

Dahilayan Adventure Park’s Zipzone! is the home of the longest zipline in Asia.

Fast facts about this zipline adventure in Dahilayan Adventure Park’s Zipzone:

- Dual Carrying cables each 840 meters long point to point

- Safety cable also 840 meters long

- Total length of cables: 2,460 meters

- Elevation drop: 100meters

- Estimated speed: 60-100KPH

- Launch point Location at 4000 ft ASL

When we were at the launching tower, all of us were excited. I just acted calm and cool, afraid that they will found out that I’m actually nervous. I was even more afraid that they will notice that I’m nervous when the girls said that they were excited, showing no sign of fear as they danced and took pictures. I prayed silently as I waited for my turn, asking God that he will help me and that everything will be O.K. When my turn came, I was trembling… And then, I was flying. Just watch this so that you will understand what I’m trying to say.

The experience was, unexplainable. I can’t explain my feeling. As I was flying, many thoughts came to my mind. I’m thinking that just one mistake, and I’ll be dead. Good thing God answers my prayers, and I reached the ground safely. After that, realized that it was fun, I said, “AGAIN!”. One thing for sure, I could conquer my fear. The experience was mind-blowing. I love it, and I want to do it again.

WE MADE IT!

Welcome to the third in my series of 10 blog posts. Stick with me for all 10 steps, and you’ll be armed with all of the information you need to get out there and purchase a home.

Step 3: Get Loan Pre-Approval

Very few people can afford to pay cash for a home. According to the National Association of REALTORs, 9 out of 10 buyers finance their home purchase. That means pretty much everybody is going to need to get some kind of a home loan.

The issue with financing your home isn’t really whether or not you can find a home loan. There are plenty out there if you aren’t selective about your terms. The challenge is to find the one that’s right for you. You want the lowest cost and the best terms.

That’s where a good lender comes in. Your Realtor can suggest one. Most likely, they’ll have you see the lender before you even meet to discuss your specific needs. It’s extremely important that you meet with a lender before you go out looking for homes. There’s nothing worse than finding that perfect house and finding out the next day that you won’t be able to afford it.

When you meet with the lender, be prepared. He or she will likely ask you for employment information(past and present,) tax information, bank account balances, retirement account holdings, etc. It’s good to compile this information beforehand to avoid and delays. Many lenders use an online form process, which allows you to provide all of this information from home; where it’s easy to find and compile all of the necessary numbers.

At the end of your meeting, the lender will provide you with a pre-approval letter. This letter is not a commitment by either party, but it does demonstrate your buying power and your ability to obtain the financing that will lead to a successful transaction. Many sellers will not accept an offer unless it is accompanied by a pre-approval letter.

If you need help finding a good lender, your Realtor will be happy to recommend a few. Herein lies another advantage to using a Realtor. They won’t recommend someone who isn’t knowledgeable and competent enough to do a good job.

A Realtor is in a much better position than the common home-buyer to identify a truly excellent lender. Ultimately, this means better options for you, lower costs, and better terms.

Next time, we’ll talk about actually getting out there and finding yourself a great house!

See ya tomorrow!

Welcome to the second in my series of 10 blog posts. Stick with me for all 10 steps, and you’ll be armed with all of the information you need to get out there and purchase a home.

Step 2: Get a Realtor

More than 2 million people in the U.S. have earned real estate licenses. Boil it down, and that means that 1 out of every 16 or so people you meet has probably gotten his or her real estate license. However, real estate is a tough business and a lot of people don’t actively help buyers and sellers.

The National Association of REALTORs includes, as its members, over 1 million real estate brokers and salespeople. All Realtors are bound by a strong Code of Ethics. They are also very well-trained in the variety of issues that surround real estate transactions. Realtors have the best understanding of the neighborhoods they work in.

Why does this all matter to you? Successfully executing a real estate deal can be tough. Doing it without professional help can be financially disastrous. You need someone you can trust to keep your best interests at the center of every deal. It’s easy to go online and looks through Zillow or Trulia, find the house you think you want, and press on.

Unfortunately, real estate is nothing like Amazon.com. There is a maze of forms, financing, inspections, pricing, and negotiations ahead. If you don’t have a professional in your corner to identify and explain each hurdle, you’re likely to trip and fall. That fall could cost you that house you wanted, your time, and worst of all, your money.

Now that you’ve digested and processed the potentially horrifying pitfalls of self-representing, you’ve probably decided to get some professional help. However, you’re now faced with another dilemma. Who do I choose?

*cough* Kenny Silva with Keller Williams Realty *cough*

Shameless plugs for my own services aside, you want someone who is going to care about you and your goals. When you interview a Realtor, make sure they ask a lot of questions and make sure they understand what it is that YOU want to accomplish? If you feel that you just spent an hour listening to some guy boast about his accomplishments and productivity, then that probably isn’t the Realtor for you.

Remember, this process is all about what YOU want and what YOU need.

So, congratulations, at this point you’ve decided that you need to find a Realtor and you’ve gone ahead and chosen yourself a good one (hopefully Kenny Silva with Keller Williams Realty a.k.a. ME!)

Stay tuned for my next post; where we’ll talk about the next important step to finding you a great house.

This morning it was 4 a.m. instead of 3:30. We were more tired than we were last week, so the sirens seemed like a dream. The helicopter didn’t seem real. But the crazy old Asian woman from four doors down running up and down the street yelling, “Yooooooohhh! Yoooooaaaaaaaaaaahhh!” finally got us.

“Who does she think she is, Paul Revere?” I asked Drew sleepily. Looking out our front window, there was nothing to see but a 4-foot-tall old woman in a stocking cap speed walking back and forth, yelling the same way she yelled when the city had to tear up the street in front of her house and accidentally killed some of her plants. But looking out our back window, there was this:

and this:

and this:

I hear no one was hurt, that it was another abandoned house, that no one knows what caused it, blah blah. It’s a little surreal to wake up once a week to a house behind you being engulfed in flames. A part of you thinks, where am I? Surely not a part of town where we paid twice as much for half as much house as we could have gotten in the suburbs, where no one is setting things on fire.

My photos would have been better, but Drew wasn’t keen on walking over to the scene with me to get better photos “for my blog.” He forgets that investigative journalism blood runs in my veins. This would have been the hottest story for me to cover since college, when I did a 60-second broadcast from the scene of a new restaurant that was supposedly being built over an Indian graveyard.

But my Drew, he’s always thinking. He said that in his sweatpants and stocking cap, he didn’t not look like an arsonist. And it was 4 in the morning. Who has time for police interrogation?

Obviously we didn’t start the fire. But seriously. Who did?

Skyscrapers of Melbourne City, taken from Rialto Observation Deck. Notice the 4 big banks (from L-R): NAB, Commonwealth, ANZ, and Wespac all fighting for a share in the sky scape.

f/9, HDR (-1, 0, +1): 6 secs, 3.2 secs, 1.6 secs tripod mounted

Each and every Saturday of the year the volunteers with the Ministry of Hope at Cross and Crown Church in Arlington Heights, Illinois, serve a feast for the homeless and low-income of the area. Approximately 50 to 70 people enjoy the hot breakfast and lunch each week. Many partake in the opportunity to attend a worship service.

The volunteers and pastors of Cross and Crown are a gift from God to the homeless. They live from their hearts, offering smiles, joy, friendship, hope and support to all who need. They serve delicious meals, give clothing, bikes, and more. They give transportation to and from the church in a church member’s van. The Ministry of Hope is NOT even part of the church budget–all costs come out of their own pockets!

The Ministry of Hope volunteers are absolutely amazing! I honestly don’t know how such a small church can do so much for so many! Some may remember that it was this same church that was vandalized around Christmastime. There was an outpouring of support from communities all around, including an awesome new Christmas tree to replace the one that was damaged by the vandalism.

I felt glad that this church was able to celebrate Christmas and feel the warmth of the community help that we homeless feel when we go to the Ministry of Hope on Saturdays. I hope to return the love and kindness someday by finding a way to help them myself, perhaps by finding them a new or used van of their own to give us rides in to and from the church. It would even grant the church the ability to give us rides to the church on Sundays so that we may attend the regular worship service–something many of us wish to do but can’t get to the church on our own.

View a pdf file about the Ministry of Hope.

What is a pet peeve, you may wonder?  A pet peeve is a minor annoyance that can instill extreme frustration in an individual.   In other words, something so simple that it can irritate the sh*t out of you. 

Below are Hottywood’s TOP 20 PET PEEVES.  Beware.  If you’re caught in the hills of Hottywood violating anything on the pet peeves list, be prepared to get your ass kicked something good! 

HOTTYWOOD’S TOP 20 PET PEEVES:

Socks and Sandals. This is the devil.  If you wear socks and sandals, then your feet should be used as a target for an archery class. 

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Morning people.  Sometimes you just want to punch the hell out of them.

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When a smelly fat guy squeezes his fat ass into the only available seat next to you on the bus.  Jump out the window while the bus is still moving.  It’ll be painful, but a quick way to put you out of your misery.

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People who txt during a date. Karate chopping would be my first suggestion, otherwise let them know you’re just as bored with them as they are with you.  Pinch your nose tightly until you pass out from lack of oxygen.

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Not having enough quarters to do laundry. When in doubt, crawl inside the washing maching and dance on top of your clothes, creating your own soap suds. 

Trust me, it’s more fun if you do it this way.  Just make sure your feet are clean.  __________________________________________________________

People who don’t wash their hands after using the bathroom.  I’m sure I’m not the only person who wishes that unsanitary person would punch himself in the face with his germ infested fist.  

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People who stink. Pee on them.  There’s no doubt they will take cleanliness a little more seriously after that.    

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People who drive below the speed limit.  I’ll tell you what; set their car on fire and make the slow mutha effer walk! 

Let’s see how long it takes ‘em to get to their destination now. 

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People who ride their bikes in the middle of the street.  There’s only one way to settle the score. 

STRIKE!!! 

If this doesn’t work, nothing will.

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Anyone who says “Hammer Time” after they’ve heard the word “STOP.” 

They should be put to an end just like MC Hammer’s career. 

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Jerks who take up 2 parking spaces.  

Karma’s a bitch! 

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People that pop and smack their chewing gum.  Throw a lighted match on their hair. I promise you they’ll stop popping their gum.  

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Anyone who does this in public.  It’s just wrong on so many levels. 

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When you can’t tell if someone is male or female.  We get it already, you like to play dress up.  But come on, there is a such thing as too much. 

Is anyone else confused about her him – THIS??? 

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People who leave the door open when they go to the bathroom. If you know anyone who does this nasty sh*t, flush them down the damn toilet, please and thank you. 

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When you’re invited to a party with people you have never met, and the host doesn’t introduce you to anyone.  

Personally, I’d rather shoot myself in the foot.  Next time, stay home and count your hair follicles.   

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When someone with a full cart of groceries gets into the 10 items or less line. This basic rule of grocery store etiquette was covered in the Grocery Shopping Handbook for Dummies. 

A good karate kick to the back of the collar bone will put an end to this madness.    

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When someone leaves their phone number at the end of a long message and they say it so fast you can’t understand it and have to listen multiple times to figure it out. 

Don’t bother to listen.  Simply toss the phone into the nearest trash can and keep on moving.  If it isn’t Jesus calling, the message can’t be that important.   

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People who chew with their mouth open.  Chew on this! 

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Anyone who gets on an elevator and stares at another passenger for a while, then yells “You’re one of THEM!” and moves to the far corner of the elevator. 

…for obvious reasons. 

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So there you have it, people!  Hottywood’s Top 20 Pet Peeves.   Please don’t get caught with your tail between your legs attempting to violate any of the above mentioned crimes.  Because if someone catches you, they are liable to tie you to a tree and use you as “bazooka” practice!  And if Hottywood catches you…well let me just remind you that he likes sharp objects and things that go BOOM! 

If you are by chance an idiot who is guilty of anything listed above, then you’d better get off your ass and make some changes.  You can do it.  90% of any effort is getting started. 

Quote of the Week:     “I don’t have pet peeves.  I have whole kennels of irritation.”

Follow me on Twitter at http://twitter.com/mrhollywood.2009

Friday night came around and I needed a cocktail in the worst way. Lately, I’ve found myself nearly completely intolerant of the general public without the help of a cocktail. Basically, the only thing keeping me from becoming a 27-year-old recluse is booze.

When Drew came home from work, we decided to be crazy and go to a new bar that just opened on Shepherd called Branchwater Tavern. Part of avoiding the general public is going to places the general public doesn’t yet know about. For us, that pretty much rules out any establishment with a street address of Washington. (For those not from around here, Washington Street near the Heights has been injected with some kind of Miracle Gro. Every day a new bar sprouts up, and every night, like magic, it’s full of guys in popped collars. It’s “If you build it, they will come” except with black lights and bouncers instead of a baseball diamond.) Branchwater Tavern is just off Washington, so we figured we were safe.

We were planning on going out to eat with my sister later that night, so we decided to sit at the bar to order drinks and snacks. We placed an order for pork cracklins and just as I was tucking in to a frosty gin gimlet, a woman appeared in front of Drew and I.

“I just want you to know, it’s OK for you to sit here for now, but we have some people coming in later who are going to be sitting here, so you’ll need to move when they get here.”

I take my cues from Drew in these situations. My judgment simply can’t be trusted. My answer is always for him to punch someone in the face, and he has his career to worry about. He shrugged and the lady walked away.

“Do we really have to move?” I hissed between gulps of gin.

“No. We’re sitting at the bar. You can’t reserve spots at the bar.” Drew calmly went on drinking his beer, and I felt better about the world. It’s nice to have a man who is in control.

Minutes later, the woman appeared again, this time with an authoritative stance.

“Ok, I just want you to know, your pork cracklins are out, and I’ve placed them over there, at the end of the bar. You’ll have to eat them down there because the people who are going to be sitting here have arrived.” I turned my head in the direction where she was pointing to see the dark, gloomy end of the bar. One guy was sitting down there with his head in his hands. Two empty stools waited for us, directly in line with the front door, which was intermittently being opened and shut, sending cold drafts over the stools. I looked at my gimlet, bathed in the warm glow of the lights above the stools where we were sitting.  Why couldn’t I have my pork cracklins unless I left the nice part of the bar? Why was I being sent to the end of the bar? Who was I, Rosa Parks?

While I was getting together coat, purse, and sloshy drink, Drew had already made it to the end of the bar. I heard him yell, “Hey T!  Some a-hole is eating our pork cracklins!”

I looked up to see three tiny men giggling as one of them happily shoved one of our pork cracklins into his gaping mouth. There were no apologies. There was no remorse. Just hilarity at the pilfered pork cracklin. I watched in further horror as the three men sauntered past us and plopped down in the seats from which we’d just been evicted. Not only did they get our seats, but they also got our pork skins.

I saw red.

“Drew! What are you going to do about this?” I demanded. “That mean woman made us take our pork cracklins at the end of the bar, and then those little guys stole them AND got our seats! And they didn’t even apologize! You don’t just steal other people’s pork cracklins! You just don’t!”

Drew shook his head.

“T, what do you want me to do?”

“Make them pay for our pork cracklins! Tell that lady we’re never coming back! I don’t know! You’re the one with the biceps!”

Needless to say, the only thing that happened was I went on a self-imposed hunger strike, because that would show them! If they are going to steal our chairs and our pork cracklins, I won’t eat anything at all! Don’t mess with old T-dawg! The hunger strike did not include a cocktail strike, unfortunately, and so I spent the entire weekend wishing for the Grim Reaper to come and take me.

I used to be able to hang. But now I’m old. And cranky.

No wonder I get sent to the end of the bar.

So who’s not psyched on amusement park rides? Come on…  I’ll give you a hint. (pointing both thumbs toward myself) Yep, you got it. Me!

But I should probably clarify what I mean by amusement park rides that I’m not psyched on, because I totally like to make up my own categories, because I can.  All right, so when I talk about terrifying amusement park rides, I mean old rickety ones and ones that are more than a story high, as well as ones that are being run by apathetic operators who’ve never heard the phrase anxiety attack.  Examples of these terrifying rides would include The Zipper, most of the roller coasters at Six Flags Great Adventure (except for the Runaway Train and Skull Mountain) and The Swings (Sigh. I used to dig this ride like you wouldn’t believe.)

Ok, so if you’ve read at least a handful of my prior posts, you know that this is where I say I either faced the fear or had to back down.  And today, I faced my fear known as the Toys R Us Ferris Wheel inside the Times Square store.  I faced it with my buddy Cody, who wasn’t freaked out in any way by the three-story machine.

It was crazy though, cause as soon as we took our seats in the M&M–themed car I started getting really nervous and recalling those news articles in which the ride stops and people get stuck and then they try to climb down and fall and die. By the way, thanks news. Glad I went to J school so that I could join the party.

But back to the M&M–themed car. I was somehow able to remind myself that fear is what you make it and how no two experiences can ever be repeated as the wheel started to turn.  I seriously love how just reminding myself of those two facts can kick down any hesitation.  So before I knew it, the wheel had gone round about 10 times with me feeling more at ease each time. That was until Cody was all like, hey, birthday girl, stand up so I can get a good shot of you with the huge Cabbage Patch face on the car behind us. So I stood up a bit, knees unwilling to unlock, and he snapped a photo of me sporting a super uneasy grin. Bam, facing fears like bloaw!

Featured Guest: Angie Boylan

Angie Boylan playing with Cheeky. Photo/ Ali Koehler

Angie Boylan has been a fixture in the Long Island punk and indie scene for a number of years now, drawing ears to hers and other females’ music abilities. She’s currently unleashing her talent on Brooklyn as the guitarist for Scantron, drummer for Each Other’s Mothers, and singer/guitarist of Little Lungs.  You can catch Boylan later this month when her band Cheeky, she’s on drums, plays its last show.

Listen as Boylan recalls a personal experience that took courage to face. An experience that when all was said and done, has led her to a community that’s instilled confidence in her, and creativity in her music.

Is she scared of flying, creepy crawlers, or heights?  Regardless of her phobia, help her overcome it (get creative).   If she’s afraid of heights, take her to the top of the empire state building and show her that her fears are nothing compared to how beautiful the city looks at night.

Photo from our archives.

I stand, just a little creeped out, at the center of the Williamsburg Bridge while the city’s skyline burns bright.

When I was 6, I wasn’t afraid of heights. I once made two holes in a plastic shopping bag and used a jump rope to tie it to the wooden guardrail of my bunk beds. Making sure one end of the jump rope was tightly knotted to the plastic bag and the other to the beds, I carefully slid my legs through the holes and with pure confidence – leapt from that top bunk down to carpeted floor. I’m not sure which broke first, the bag or the jump rope.

When I was 14, I still wasn’t afraid of heights. I once encouraged two friends to join me on a new and uber awesome attraction at Six Flags Great Adventure. The attraction was part of the ever-so-cool (at the time) bungee jump and human sling shot family. So the three of us strapped ourselves into this bungee-rigged flying contraption just in time for a crane to pull us as far back, and as high up, as it could. And right as we got as high up as we could, I (that’s right, I) initiated countdown, 3.. 2… tugged the chord – 1! We swooped hundreds of feet head first on our stomachs toward the ground. Nothing broke this time.

When I hit my early 20s, I heights started freaking me out. (I wouldn’t really say scared). It was more a slight sense of apprehension, they type that causes your stomach to feel as if it were shriveling up like a freshly salted slug. Yeah, I was – and have been ever since – apprehensive of heights.

So with stomach-shriveling apprehension, I figured why not walk over the Williamsburg Bridge, ‘cause that qualifies as doing one thing that scares me, right? The bridge is 135 feet high, after all. And it’s suspended over water. Did I mention I am seriously terrified of drowning? Well I am. Ok, so the bridge is high and it’s over water. Sounds like a scary mix to me.

 I know, I know, I am dragging this story out.  Sorry.  I promise, I’ll speed it up from here on out. So I got Matty V to agree to walk to the Sonic Youth/ Dinosaur Jr/ Cold Cave show tonight and to take the Williamsburg Bridge route, since it’s just on the other side of my neighborhood. (Psst … I asked him this fully aware that he is waaaaay more afraid of heights than I am. Yeah, I’m an awesome friend.) I was pretty solid for the first leg of the bridge trek, that was until we reached the center, where the ground below me started shaking – thank you, trucks – and when I looked up then down I got seriously dizzy. Oh and the cyclists with their fixed gear bikes. They totally added to that moment of fear. Like really? Do you really need to speed around bends on the bridge while pulling the widest turns ever?

But as you all can see, I successfully made it over the 1.4 mile bridge in one piece sans an anxiety attack. It probably helped knowing that I was taking the walk with someone who is even more apprehensive than I am when it comes to heights. So, yeah, you know the deal, I totally had to save face.

But seriously, I think it was having a little confidence and reminding myself to stop letting news stories get to me that helped me make it over the bridge. Honestly, when it comes to such things, you know like basing potential future experiences on past experiences, ignorance is bliss while preventive measures might as well double for iron restraints.