I would drink his bath water…

It appears that as a rugby player there is an unwritten law that you must get naked at least once a year (unless your name is Jonny Wilkinson, then apparently you can never get naked – pfft). And it’s another reason why I fucking love rugby players.

Here we have young Delon Armitage in his little red pants.

And the picture that made my day. My crush on Danny Care is already pretty huge, I mean he’s 5′7 and I still want him, that has to be true love surely? Anyway after seeing this picture (and maybe squealing in delight) I am full on crushing on this young hunk of a man.

I want him. I want him now!! Guuuh!!

If ya’ll don’t appreciate the beauty of this man…something ain’t right with you…

These pictures seriously kill me. In a good way. A very very good way.

Incase anyone was wondering, this is what the other dude looked liked in the sexiest clash of heads ever. Not quite as sexy but still pretty damn hot.

I think it’s time I added a ‘bashed up’ catergory. I seem to be in the bloody mood lately.

Martin Palermo celebrates his goal for Argentina last night in the best way possible. I’m sure he got booked for this, but oh it was SO worth it.

It’s at times like this you realise rain isn’t all bad.

So Iker really doesn’t like being touched, no?

He is much happier to be alone. I love his glove marks – too cute.

Albi: So how big is Misty’s crush on you now?

Nando: Mmm, ’bout this big. Growing more each day..

Armani have revealed that Sir David of Beckham will no longer be stripping down and oiling up those fine, fine abs to pose in his pants. So who could possibly replace Becks? Oh yes you guessed it, I am so freaking excited by this news. The new Armani model shall be none other than the grease monster himself Cristiano Ronaldo.

Unff. CANNOT BLOODY WAIT TO SEE THE BUILDING SIZED PHOTOS OF HIM IN HIS UNDIES. Arrrgh. Brilliant. ARMANI WINS AT LIFE. One final thing: how the hell do I get a job as a photographer for them?

One other final thing: Does CRon want to BE Becks or something? He replaced him at Man United, then at Real Madrid and now as an underwear model. I really hope he doesn’t fall into the yukky beard trap.

Tomorrow, One Pretentious Bastard will host the first annual HOT DAMN! DAY. What is HOT DAMN! DAY? Glad you asked…

Back in College, whenever a number of us were upset, we would gather in the middle of a quad and yell HOT DAMN before heading off to IHOP or Perkins or some other late-night stop. The point was to just let go for a minute and just allow oneself to get through a series of rough or stressful times. We can’t really do a HOT DAMN! DAY on campus anymore, nor should people in large urban environments walk out into their neighborhood and scream HOT DAMN!

So I am inviting people–friends, fellow bloggers, acquaintances–to post a HOT DAMN tomorrow. A random yell may do us all a lot of good.

I’ve always loved Nando, he is a great player and so sweet, but I’ve never fancied him. Ever. Until this season. Black eyes, swearing, aggressively flashing his abs of glory. How am I meant to resist such things?

Score a few more goals and I just might doodle your name on my notepad.

I have no words. Actually no words. This mans abs were carved by angels. Perfection. (And very very smooooth, baby!!)

Just, unff.

Man, I love me some rugby players. Even the least attractive of men look doable once they’ve slipped into that rugby shirt.

That is all.

Today I was sent an email with the following pictures attached and the simple message ‘Bring back Tuesday Tottie’. Who am I to argue with such requests. Enjoy.

Ben Cohen. 6′3. 30. England and Sale Sharks rugby player. General hot, hairy pieca meat. Appearing in current issue of Attitude magazine.

Black eyes, badass swearing. There is only so much a girl can resist.

2 Pistols ft Nelly-Hot Damn

Miami 38 – FSU 34. Yes, that actually happened. I didn’t think my poor ‘Canes had a chance, but Jacory Harris was on a bitch! And now I get to act like a douchebag until Miami gets donkey punched by Georgia Tech next week.

* masturbates furiously *

* punches an elderly man *

* pops collar *

* gets a tan *

* watches Entourage *

* strikes this pose *

I don’t care if Miami’s defense was as leaky as Paris Hilton’s vagina or that Florida State managed that last drive like Charles Manson handles dinner parties, we’re 1-0 and you are a stoopid doo-doo head. Excuse me while I go bathe with Axe bodyspray.

Ooo!  How exciting!!! 

Guess what’s going to be released on September 25th?!

Umm… have you been living under a rock?!  It’s US Weekly Magazine’s The Sexy Stars of New Moon!

Check out these scans of the upcoming special edition magazine:

And if you were unfortunate in snagging your copy of the first issue of The Sexy Stars of Twilight, you can still grab it here!

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