Here is a nation of extremely fertile soil.  Stick a plant into the ground, oila!  It doesn’t merely grow, it thrives!

Only the vilest form of a madman could screw it all up.  From its days as a well-organized, efficiently-run British Colony,  Zimbabwe declared its independence in 1980.

For the last 32 years, Robert Mugabe has ‘led’ this reasonably-sized nation (390,757 sq. km, 150,804 sq. miles) of 13-million souls .  In comparative area terms, Zimbabwe is slightly larger than either Japan or Germany.

Mr. Mugabe has never been shy about what he thinks:  “The only white man you can trust is a dead white man.”

Lack of self-confidence?  Not Mr. Mugabe’s problem.  In an interview to mark his  88th birthday in February and to dispel rumors of his ill health, he said: “The day will come when I will become sick. As of now I am fit as a fiddle,” he said. “I have died many times. That’s where I have beaten Christ. Christ died once and resurrected once. I don’t know how many times I will die and resurrect.”

22 April 2010: Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is welcomed by Zimbabwean President Robert Mugabe at Harare Airport  (Picture: Sipa Press / Rex Features)

Though today, technically, Mr. Mugabe ‘shares’ power with political rival Prime Minister Morgan Tsvangirai in a fragile coalition formed three years ago, it is the kleptocratic, homicidal Mugabe’s ‘leadership’ that has notably propelled Zimbabwe in many ways, not least economically.

As of 14 November 2008, Zimbabwe’s annual inflation rate was 89.7 Sextillion percent.  For those to whom ‘Sextillion’ is not a household word, think ten to the 21^st power.

In figures, this reads 89,700,000,000,000,000,000,000%

The Cato Institute was following this debacle.  At one stage,  Steve H. Hanke, 
Professor of Applied Economics at The Johns Hopkins University wrote:

“Since mid-November 2008, the weekly update of the [hyperinflation index] has been put on hold. The market-based price data from Zimbabwe have deteriorated and, at present, cannot be used to update the [hyperinflation index] …. updates will be resumed as soon as the quality of the data reaches a satisfactory level.”

The peak monthly rate was 79.6 billion percent.  That equals  98% – per day – or around 7× 10¹⁰⁸ percent yearly rate.

At that rate, prices were doubling every 24.7 hours.

Around that time, a colleague in Harare intended to send me a Zimbabwe note denominated ‘One Hundred Trillion Zimbabwean Dollars’.

The Mugabe regime had to have these printed in Germany.  Why? No power to run the printing presses in Zimbabwe.  This mega-note was to be ‘The Answer’ to the problem.

Within a mere few hours, inflation surged upwards.  Zim$One Hundred Trillion plunged first to an equivalent of US$3.00 and then into trash.

Apparently, one of these notes was indeed posted to me.  Alas, it was stolen by a postal worker in Harare. Hope he enjoyed it, or while it lasted.

(That theft reminds me of my first jaunt to Nigeria in the mid-1970s.  I’d written a postcard to my bride.  Just as I reached up to drop it into the British-style pillar-box (mailbox), a kind local lady came running up to me shouting, “Don’t do that!”.  She then explained. “The postman always steals the stamps. He re-sells them for a discount.”  She advised that I take my card to the Post Office, hand it across the counter to a clerk and demand to watch him hand-cancel the stamp.  Welcome to Africa.)

Beyond the economy, Zimbabwe is a series of unseemly twists from another age or perhaps even another consciousness.

Two years ago, a Zimbabwean mother strangled her own 18-months old baby son to death.  Why?

To carve off and sell one of his ears (curiously, only one).

“She sold the ear to a traditional healer notorious for ritual murders in Mozambique.  She sold the ear for $20 (£13) but was given $10 with the balance to be paid later.”

More recently, this country known for its magnificent wildlife and safaris is known for hunting of another sort.

Would you believe “sperm hunting”?  (One just can’t make this stuff up!)

“Zimbabwe ‘sperm hunters’ picking up male travelers”

Gangs of women in Zimbabwe have been picking up male travellers to have sexual intercourse and harvest their sperm, according to reports.

Sisters Sophie Nhokwara (26), Netsai Nho…Sisters Sophie Nhokwara (26), Netsai Nhokwara (24) and Rosemary Chakwizira (28) leave Harare Magistrates court on November 29, 2011 after a pre-trial hearing for attacking male hitchhikers to collect semen for rituals. The women allegedly used different cars to pick up 14 other men and forced themselves on them. They were arrested early in October when they were involved in a car accident, and police found 31 used condoms in the boot of their car. Photo: GETTY

Susan Dhliwayo claims she pulled her car over recently to pick up a group of male hitchhikers and they refused to get in, because they feared they were going to be raped.

“Now, men fear women. They said: ‘we can’t go with you because we don’t trust you’,” 19-year-old Miss Dhliwayo recounted.

Local media have reported victims of the highway prowlers being drugged, subdued at gun or knife point – even with a live snake in one case – given a sexual stimulant and forced into repeated sex before being dumped on the roadside.

The sperm hunters first surfaced in the local press in 2009 but police have only arrested three women, found with a plastic bag of 31 used condoms in October. The attacks have continued since they were nabbed for allegedly violating 17 men.

“We do not have the exact number of confirmed cases,” said national police spokesman Wayne Bvudzijena.

“These cases occurred mostly when the victims were hitchhiking and boarded private vehicles. We encourage people to use public transport.”

The sperm’s exact use is not clear but is thought to be intended for “juju” or traditional rituals to bring luck – anything from enhancing good fortune, boosting business or preventing a criminal from being detected.

It is also not known why the semen is taken forcibly from strangers.

“It’s really an issue which is mind boggling,” said University of Zimbabwe sociologist Watch Ruparanganda, who believes it is a lucrative business. “It’s quite a big mystery. Obviously we know (it is) being used for rituals.”

Ruparanganda said he was astonished to discover seven years ago that semen appeared to have become a tradable commodity, while doing research for his doctoral thesis among Harare street youth who told him that businessmen would take them to hotels, give them new clothes and ply them with booze.

They were then told to pick a prostitute and to hand over the used condom after sex.

“It just shows there’s some big racket somewhere, some big guys driving everything, but they are in the background and using these ladies,” said Ruparanganda.

The Zimbabwe National Traditional Healers Association criticised the practice.

“We believe that this is a form of witchcraft. So we are totally against the idea,” said spokesman George Kandiyero.

“It has really frightened people,” he said. “It has really brought in a bit of shock because normally it was the other way round, normally we know of men raping women, not women raping men.”

A Zimbabwean women’s rights group has criticised the spotlight shifting to male rape victims, and paid for a newspaper advert to deplore that violence against women in the country is not met with the same degree of shock.

The three women linked to the case, meanwhile, have stirred much attention and public anger. Audiences pack into the dreary courtrooms each time they appear in the dock, and one of their lawyers said they have received death threats.

No law in Zimbabwe criminalises rape by women so the trio, arrested with one man, face 17 counts of aggravated indecent assault, though no trial date has as yet been set.

Dumisani Mthombeni, a lawyer for two of the women and the man, complained that five months after their arrest, prosecutors have yet to produce DNA test results, a charge sheet or witness statements but nonetheless have “paraded (the women) on national television as female rapists”.

“We have not been given anything – nothing,” Mthombeni said. “We believe they don’t want us to go to trial because they arrested the wrong people.”

The case has triggered a mix of shock, intrigue and humour – such as one newspaper cartoon showing a nude hitchhiker hoping to be picked up by a female driver – but also fear among some men.

“Of course we are scared,” said a 26-year-old hitchhiker on a highway south of Harare, adding he would not get into a car driven by a woman.

“Even if she’s old, we can’t.”

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The other cartoon which is going around Zimbabwe on this topic is here:

For any gentle-lady reader over, say, 75, you are as young as you feel.

Your mystical feminine powers and guile remain far greater than even you think they are.  (Not that that is a surprise to any of us chaps!)

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(NB: For those of a literary disposition, you may want to pick up a copy of the memorably-named Watch Ruparanganda’s even more memorably-titled “Genitals Are Assets?”.  I am not making this up.  See, LAP Lambert Academic Publishing, ISBN 978-3-8443-3080-9, paperback, 328pp, but pricey at €79, or say, £66, $105.  Amazon.com has it for $113.) [NB:  Quality or value for money may be an issue here. The text of LAP's books have been submitted for publication on-line by the author.  They are neither peer-reviewed nor even edited.  LAP is part of a German group, VDM, which, at no cost to any author of any 'academic' text, publishes the book.  LAP sells it wherever it can. The author gets one free copy.  You have been warned.]

Hat-tips to:  The Cato Institute http://www.cato.org/zimbabwe

Aislinn Laing, http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/africaandindianocean/zimbabwe/7866744/Zimbabwean-mother-kills-son-to-sell-ear-to-witch-doctor.html

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/9159992/Zimbabwe-sperm-hunters-picking-up-male-travellers.html